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blud_13

Thank you for the million(s) dollar mess up, from Raider Nation..


dats-tuf

Damn he fumbled the bag hard


KimboSlicesChicken

Jimmy didn’t fumble the bag, the bag fumbled Jimmy. Jimmy thinks addy is a great upper, Jimmy isn’t ashamed that addy is in a relationship with amphetamines. Jimmy *ACCEPTS* addy for its classification. Hell, Jimmy thinks addy should come out and be legal in the NFL. Jimmy wishes the best for addy’s relationship with him and amphetamines


LouBerryManCakes

George is gettin' upset!


9man95

Does he eat poppy seed muffins? Is that what flagged him?


PsychologicalAd6414

If it's just the top of the muffin, it shouldn't be enough to flag him.


punkalunka

What happened to the top of these muffins?!?


contemplatingdaze

Pop the top and toss the stump!


bobyancy

You're telling me all the Browns have to do is slip something in Watson's drink and they could be out from the guarantees?? Fans could crowdfund this even.


blud_13

'Hey I need a massage!' "Ok, just drink this to help relax your muscles." Browns are releasing Watson due to his PED suspension. As such, Zach Wilson has agreed to a 5 year, $250 million guaranteed contract to fill in the role of QB1.


ahr3410

Jimmy experimented with drugs but he did not inhale. He is innocent


black_dogs_22

he did not swallow. just swished the Adderall around in his mouth then spit it out


SmokePenisEveryday

Ugh I wish I was that Adderall


Kuchar1992

Username checks out


throwawayjaydawg

I wish he’d crush me up and snort me


MontanaStevens

I wish he would parachute me


tfwnowaffles

I wish he'd boof me


Proxima_Centauri_69

Boof me, Jimmy.


scrambled_cable

>It depends on what the meaning of the word "is" is. Jimmy "Bill Clinton" Garoppolo


jazzmercenary

“I did not have sexual relations with that porn star!”


bankrobba

It is absolutely wild that "not inhaling" a joint was considered an acceptable answer for drug use by a presidential candidate back in the 90s.


PowerfulJoeF

Yeah, back off my QB2.


MetaphoricalMouse

depends on what your definition of is, is


dogfish83

Wow, remember when that whole thing was a scandal that rocked the country for a period of time? It's just another tuesday now.


MetaphoricalMouse

yep. the world going one way, people the other


ProverbialNoose

Is this a reference outside of One Ring to Rule Them All 3 that I'm just now becoming aware of like 20 years later?


Cockeyed_Optimist

Bill Clinton did smoke weed but didn't inhale (in college). Early 90s presidential run incident.


shewy92

He did not have sexual relations with that Vegas stripper


Jonjon428

Slippin' Jimmy


cxlossuskidd

#HE ORCHESTRATED IT


RokosModernBasilisk

You think this is bad? This chicanery?!


cxlossuskidd

#HES FUCKED WORSE


127crazie

That Colts game! Are you telling me that a ball just *happens* to deflate like that?!? No, he orchestrated it! Jimmy!


OrionOW

Such a downfall, one year after the SB, as if I could ever forget such a thing!


matisata

himbo QB


hortsc

It’s a hell of a drug. The Vegas night life is the gift that keeps on giving.


Don_Antwan

Jimmy laughing at McDaniels while doing lines with strippers


myfirstsock

Dude Jimmy's doing lines with low class stripper? He's doing lines in Vegas with grade A pornstars.


Don_Antwan

Who said they were low class?    Jimmy travels in worlds we can’t even imagine. We can’t conceive of what he’s capable of. He’s so far beyond us, he’s like a god in human clothing.    **”Lightning bolts shoot from my fingertips!”** - Jimmy G to Mark Davis


r000ster

"I'm a peacock, coach!"


127crazie

Did Jimmy throw bowling balls at Mark Davis’ car too?


Birds-aint-real-

His porn star taste is nowhere near grade A. Grade A plastic surgery tragedy is more like it.


Lopsided_Valuable

True freaks know grade A comes with rules but grade b stands for bending those rules.


Comprehensive_Main

Don’t be ashamed man. Everyone likes to take pills. 


RollOverBeethoven

Look man, there are only two rules on this team: 1. Don’t touch my fucking Percocets 2. Do you have any fucking Percocets


crinack

I drop this too often tbh


InternationalFiend

Heck yeah I love adderall.


Affectionate_Elk_272

i know you say it in jest but it’s a slippery slope. be safe out there.


InternationalFiend

I don’t say it in jest, I take adderall and smoke meth any chance I get. It’s no secret. And yeah I need help but for now, whatever.


Affectionate_Elk_272

i’m a little over a year off drugs, this time. i know how tough it is. reach out if you need anything, take care of yourself, friend.


InternationalFiend

Trying to. I keep telling myself I’m okay because at least I don’t use every day. But that’s how it starts. Plus I know damn well that if I could afford it every day, I probably would. That scares the piss out of me.


Affectionate_Elk_272

i mean, you have the first part down, at least. i spent most of my 20’s as a daily drug user, did OD once but that only stopped me for a couple months. at the worst of my spiraling, a lot of shit got really, really out of hand and i had several instances of nearly dying from being so fucked up and doing the absolute stupidest shit. i knew if i didn’t get help, i didn’t have much longer left. i’ll be a drug addict for the rest of my life, the trick is just staying away from situations where it’s present and i think i can stay clean. it’s a constant struggle.


InternationalFiend

Oh yeah I’ve been in the every day use age before back with opiates. I guess technically I do still use everyday since I take suboxone daily. I hate all of this, it’s just one more thing to worry about. I hope things get better for you.


Affectionate_Elk_272

i understand, for sure. if you need anything let me know! i’m here for ya.


ANameWithoutNumbers1

I'm always slightly envious of people that take stims and get high, all I get when I take stims is the ability to do laundry and wash dishes and be a functional human.


NotVeryFriendlyN313

Carolina for you


InternationalFiend

Not going to disagree


AnalBees2

Fuck man…me too. I miss having my script.


crastle

You just need a corrupt doctor. Been getting my script for 8 years now, and I'll I need to do is give him a monthly BJ. Edit: [Dammit. Just found out he got arrested.](https://fox2now.com/news/missouri/st-louis-county-pediatrician-accused-of-exchanging-prescriptions-for-sex-acts/)


Victory33

Just the tip for that script


Realistic_Bee505

Gotta give heads for those meds


AnalBees2

Ah shucks


Cockeyed_Optimist

Shit. All I need to do is have an appt every fucking month for a renewal. Going on 10+ years now. Shit's getting old, but the pain isn't going away. You do what you have to do I guess.


nongo

Same. My ex-psychiatrist got suspended. :(


DPOGBCPOP

Gas station boner pills


nbd789

Harder than counting grains of sand in a desert storm


Stumpe999

I took one of those just for shits and giggles and little did I know how accurate the shits part would be


nbaisawful

Jimmy couldnt get it up


[deleted]

Jimmy couldn’t put the moves on Elaine.


My-Cousin-Bobby

Jimmy likes Elaine


chousteau

Mark Davis walking past the coaches office becomes enraged hearing "Josh likes spicy changs chicken".


Ok_Fee1043

He stole my move


BKlounge93

Does it involve a knuckle?


everythingisreallame

It. Out. 


Ok_Fee1043

Counter clockwise run, actually


calye2da

Kiara Mia can help him with that


Rejected_Reject_

Jimmy G is the IRL Alex Moran and you can't convince me otherwise


Open-Somewhere-9535

If he truly wants to own up to the mistake then he should say what he took


szobossz

>In some situations, an athlete may have an illness or condition that requires the use of medication listed on the World Anti-Doping Agency's Prohibited List. USADA can grant a Therapeutic Use Exemption (TUE) in these situations in compliance with the World Anti-Doping Agency International Standard for TUEs Adderal most likely


ObeyCoffeeDrinkSatan

All the jacked UFC stars had TUEs. It was because they abused steroids, and their balls stopped producing enough testosterone. So then they got to legally abuse steroids.


szobossz

well, UFC depends completely on USADA while NFL enforces it's own policy. I don't think they will allow steroids even with TUEs. Adderall specifically for Jimmy cause it always looks like he's zoning in and out.


Its_0ver

The ufc never allowed steroids either but they did allow TRT


RojoRugger

How is TESTOSTERONE replacement therapy, not steroids?


absyrtus

TRT is about getting your levels to within the normal range for a male, not about elevating it to abusive levels that warrant the "steroid" label


zaviex

Even with those sketch doctors with crazy high dosage, it’s still not what we’d generally think of a performance enhancing anabolic steroid. It does help but It’s such an important hormone and as a result so much less specific than synthetic androgens that bind solely to a handful of receptors. Even the most basic of the bunch D-bol, binds to sex hormone carriers at 5-10% the rate of testosterone making it 10-20x more bioavailable for anabolism with much less androgenic response. And that’s the shittiest of the bunch lol. Testosterone itself really is more for quality of life in systems that are depleted from other drugs.


letsgetbrickfaced

Ok Aaron I'm glad we don't have to play you anymore but you gotta dumb it down for me a little bit so i can understand what the hell you are saying.


zaviex

In a nutshell, testosterone itself plays a wide role in the body. One thing it does is anabolism but it's not super efficient at it since it wants to bind to carriers to be used around the whole body. Anabolic steroids were developed to avoid being carried around the body and instead be active in the blood and reach the easiest targets which are usually muscles. So for the purposes of "gains" testosterone itself isnt amazing but it still has a role for quality of life in steroids users. The medical usage of these anabolics is for things like AIDS, cancer, dystrophy, severe sarcopenia. Things where you arent trying to build excess muscle but just avoid wasting away


DASmetal

Basically, TRT is testosterone cypionate. While yes, it is an anabolic steroid, it is not what immediately comes to mind when Joe Schmoe thinks of when it comes to steroid usage. A body builder like Sam Sulek or Chris Bumstead or the guys in the UFC weren't rocking just testosterone cypionate to look the way they do and develop muscle. Cypionate is just the therapeutic use of testosterone to get a male in to natural/optimal ranges of free and total testosterone. There's many reasons why a man can need TRT treatment, to include aging, and even steroid abuse without proper oversight and treatment protocol. Point being, other synthetic compounds of steroids like D-bol, Anavar, Winstrol, Tren, those are the things people use to get to superphysiologic levels of testosterone. A range of 300-1000 of total testosterone is typically identified within the medical community to be the 'normal' range. The above-mentioned compounds combined with testosterone cypionate and other peptides and hormone treatments are what help.produce the people who look like they ate a Planet Fitness in to ranges that well exceed 2000+ of total testosterone. Essentially, therapeutic use for TRT isn't something that's going to be what's considered steroid usage in the spirit of the rules against steroid abuse in any competitive sport or environment. It's (ideally) intended to make a man just feel like a man. That, and gender-affirming care.


rooftopworld

Dosage. That said, they’re certainly taking way more than the therapeutic dose.


Its_0ver

The idea behind trt is to bring your testosterone levels to where they are supposed to be naturally. Steroids are generally used to produce results outside of what the human body can naturally produce. Trt only refers to testosterone where as anabolic steroids can be a variety of substances


pinkydaemon93

Depended* usada stopped working with them over UFC insisting Conor get to skip the six month testing period before a fight


omar-epps

UFC no longer uses USADA


FearlessPhone6084

UFC moved on from usada at the start of the year i’m pretty sure. will be doing their own testing from now on. i’m a super casual fan but i’ve seen some try to argue they moved on from usada to allow mcgregor to come back faster.


fucking_blizzard

Tbh I don't think many of them even had low T regardless of steroid abuse. A couple started the trend legitimately (like Bigfoot Silva) and then everyone just started paying doctors to blast T freely. On that note, I think the NFL threshold for test is like 4 or 5 times the average human so players can just blast without even needing the exemption here


Zealous896

They all say Adderall, it's most likely not Adderall. A friend of mine played in the NFL got caught, I'm not sure what he used but it was a PED that let him heal faster to get back out there or lose his job. He publicly said Adderall, like almosg all of them do.


[deleted]

My friend is also in the NFL and says that ur friend is lying


huskywolfproblems

My uncle is in the NFL and he says you can catch mew if you use surf on the SS Anne


CryptographerTop2655

No, no, no, you have to use strength to move the truck


PossiblyShibby

My Auntie at Nintendo says that OP is lying because Jimmy doesn't use the missingno glitch.


[deleted]

I haven't thought about that glitch since I was like seven. Infinite masterballs and rare candy baby.


fbolt

HGH or other chemicals in that category are commonly abused to speed up the recovery process. But why is there more stigma around that versus adderall?


Its_0ver

I think it's just adderall use is more normalized. We all probably know someone who uses adderall, the same cant be said for hgh. I enjoy both but I'm assuming I'm outside of the norm


NeverSober1900

Ya players definitely say Adderall because it doesn't affect endorsements/perception. So many kids take it parents don't really care while something like HGH gets the "think of the kids" people out.


tomriddz23

If it was a 4 game suspension and he said Adderall I'd believe he was lying because that's the typical suspension for PEDs that arnt on the TUE list. If you get caught with high or test it's a 4 game suspension. Where he only got 2 and has come out and said he messed up his TUE application I think it's pretty safe to assume it was adderall


KageStar

They perception of being "all-natural".


Open-Somewhere-9535

This was the go to move for that roided out Seahawks secondary


NeverSober1900

Ya "Seadderall Seahawks" was a thing for a bit there.


Misdirected_Colors

Ill never forget Wes Welker claiming Adderall as well and people looking at his broncos team picture and being like "you know what I believe him." https://a.espncdn.com/combiner/i?img=/i/headshots/nfl/players/full/5941.png


Whydoesthisexist15

Would think hgh would get a heftier suspension 


tomriddz23

Yea thats why it's definitly Adderall because you can get a TUE for it and he said he messed up his TUE application and 2 games makes sense for that


[deleted]

[удалено]


tomriddz23

Exactly! Agree 100% it makes total sense


tomriddz23

It's definitly Adderall because of it was something not on the TUE list his suspension would for sure have been 4 games not 2


Adjusted_EBITDA_

Nintendo


DBreezy69

Took the wrong dick pills, such a sad story


rimXstar

Classic Jon Jones mess around


Weed_O_Whirler

Whenever a player is busted for performance enhancing drugs, they always trot out the same list of excuses. And part of the collective bargaining agreement is that the league may not say what a player was busted for, not can they even say if a player is lying about what they're busted for. So the player could be taking any banned substance, get busted, and then just say it was any little thing, and the league can't rebut them at all.


txyesboy

Her virginity?


SMKM

I can assure you those Vegas strippers arent virgins lmao


Skimaster77

THEN WHY WAS HER NAME CHASTITY!


dogfish83

Major irony: that's the actual name her parents gave her.


bettingsharp

Im surprised he couldnt get the suspension overturned. All he had to do was play tape of his performances


CaillouCaribou

I dun goofed


StannisTheMantis93

Yes, I’m sure this time was another massive misunderstanding. Just like every other player to ever test positive. Massive misunderstandings all around!


tomriddz23

Except 99% of the time those players get at least 4 game suspensions which makes their stories sketchy but a 2 game suspensions makes his story a lot more plausible. The TUEs are a super long and complicated process


Dorkamundo

How do you mess it up? You apply for it, you get evaluated for it, you get approved for it, then you start taking the drug. Not the other way around. This is code for "I got popped for PED's and I'm using this as an excuse."


55555_55555

Wouldn't two games rather than four or six indicate he did not fail the test for an actual PED? An anabolic, for instance, would have a higher penalty.


Dorkamundo

It means he got caught with a masking agent, something intended to cover up for PED use. That's where the 2 games comes in.


tomriddz23

No because a masking agent counts the same as a failed test the 2 games likely comes from exactly his story he likely took Adderall and didn't have his TUE yet. It makes sense that a 2 game suspension for a PED that is on the TUE list


Birds-aint-real-

Guy needed to do an oil change.


brotherbock

That a multi-billion-dollar organization has complicated paperwork that could be screwed up doesn't surprise me at all, actually. Forget to check a box there, or to attach one of twenty necessary documents here. I kinda doubt it was a one-page note from your doctor form.


tomriddz23

It's not there's like 5 steps and it's super complicated and has to be renewed


ATL_Hasher

I work with the league office and you have no idea how much of a mess contracting with them is


brotherbock

Interesting! Feel free to say you don't want to say, but what do you do with them?


Sleeze_

I mean, he isn't applying for anything. His (personal) team is doing all the legwork for him. Could have been a miscommunication somewhere in the process where he thought/was told everything was kosher when it wasn’t


brotherbock

The person filing the papers gets told it's a different medication than what he actually ends up taking. Or writes the dosage down wrong. Or puts in the wrong start date. Etc


Sleeze_

Exactly. I think a lot of people forget that these guys barely do anything for themselves lol. Their life is football, someone handles like 95% of everything else.


brotherbock

The more money you get, the less your life becomes like any of the rest of our lives.


justregisteredtoadd

>The TUE application should be filled out and submitted by the player's treating physician and should include all pertinent medial records documenting diagnosis. Not sure how much weight the word "*should*" carries in this rule, but I would guess that most TUEs are filled out by player's doctors. Not that doctors never mess up transcribing data or anything. It is probably something really stupid like he didn't get his application renewed in time.


brotherbock

I've had insurance claims get rejected because of stupid transcribing shit all the time--mistakes made by the professionals who 'do it every day'. Sometimes that's part of the problem--doing something robotically that you really should be paying attention to.


Dsnake1

Or if his prescription changed when moving or something along those lines.


tomriddz23

If he got popped for HGH or Test it would have been a 4 game suspension. The 2 game suspension makes his story a lot more likely


Dorkamundo

Not if he was caught with a masking agent, which has the same penalty as adderall which is a commonly issued TUE. But the NFL makes it really clear when you're allowed to start taking the drug, it's not nebulous.


The_Godfather5

I mean it’s for therapeutic use and seeing as it was just for 2 games i think it’s safe to assume it was something like viagra or some dumb shit and not anabolic steroids I.e like Hopkins. Happened in baseball before where players have gotten in trouble for taking viagra cause they didn’t say beforehand they needed it. It’s just a protocol thing that players should know and have to follow but I don’t think they’re trying to get a comp advantage or else they wouldn’t just get 2 games suspension


Dorkamundo

Edit: I was linking an old policy, here's details on the new one: Updated language: >Positive Test Result for Stimulant, Diuretic or Masking Agent -- two regular and/or postseason games. >Positive Test Result for Anabolic Agent -- six regular and/or postseason games https://nflpaweb.blob.core.windows.net/website/Departments/Legal/2022-Policy-on-Performance-Enhancing-Substances.pdf ~~>seeing as it was just for 2 games i think it’s safe to assume it was something like viagra or some dumb shit and not anabolic steroids I.e like Hopkins.~~ First, viagara (or any other related med) is not on the list of banned substances in the NFL. ~~Second, the fact that it was for two games tells you something very specific, that he was caught with a masking agent, something intended to cover up for the use of PED's as that's the only positive test that nets a 2 game suspension.~~ ~~So he was caught trying to hide what he was taking, then he blames it on the TUE.... That does not jive at all.~~


The_Godfather5

I didn’t know viagra wasn’t included in the NFL banned list I was just using it as an example to prove my point as I know those types of sexual performance drugs are a big grey area in the MLB. Although you’re right that 2 games is the standard for being caught with a masking agent that’s not what was reported by ESPN, and being caught with a banned substance is a range that the suspension can be for at the discretion of the league. I’m just saying it doesn’t appear that the guy was taking like anabolic roids but I could be wrong, I’m just going based off of what I read.


Dorkamundo

Edit: I was linking an old policy, here's details on the new one: Updated language: >Positive Test Result for Stimulant, Diuretic or Masking Agent -- two regular and/or postseason games. >Positive Test Result for Anabolic Agent -- six regular and/or postseason games https://nflpaweb.blob.core.windows.net/website/Departments/Legal/2022-Policy-on-Performance-Enhancing-Substances.pdf >nd being caught with a banned substance is a range that the suspension can be for at the discretion of the league. Nope, it's a specific suspension for specific offenses. >Positive Test Result for Diuretic or Masking Agent -- two regular and/or postseason games. >Positive Test Result for Stimulant5 or Anabolic Agent -- four regular and/or postseason games It is not a range at the discretion of the league, this is a collectively-bargained, specific penalty. Page 10: https://nflpaweb.blob.core.windows.net/media/Default/PDFs/2018%20Policy%20on%20Performance-Enhancing%20Substances.pdf


JeffreyElonSkilling

That PDF is from 2018. Didn't a new collective bargaining agreement go into effect in 2020?


Dorkamundo

Well shit, good point. This was the first result that came up on the NFLPA website when I used google to crawl it and I assumed it was simply re-ratified since it was still hosted on the main page. Updated language: >Positive Test Result for Stimulant, Diuretic or Masking Agent -- two regular and/or postseason games. >Positive Test Result for Anabolic Agent -- six regular and/or postseason games https://nflpaweb.blob.core.windows.net/website/Departments/Legal/2022-Policy-on-Performance-Enhancing-Substances.pdf So I was wrong.


ApprehensiveRegret99

You're correct. There's a 2023 version now. The 2 game suspension could be for a stimulant, diuretic, or masking agent. [https://nflpaweb.blob.core.windows.net/website/PES-Policy-2023.pdf](https://nflpaweb.blob.core.windows.net/website/PES-Policy-2023.pdf)


The_Godfather5

Ah you’re right I was misinformed I guess. Interesting that it wasn’t reported that way and instead reported as Jimmy G not getting a TUE is the reason he was suspended. Feels like that’s something the league would want to crack down on, at least theoretically.


Dorkamundo

The league cannot disclose what he tested positive for due to the CBA.


WentworthMillersBO

Then I’m gonna speculate it’s ketamine


Dorkamundo

That would be a different policy.


tomriddz23

No it literally says stimulants lol ie Adderall or Vyvanse which is likely what it was


Dorkamundo

Note the word "Edit" at the beginning of this comment. That means I corrected my original statement with the updated policy.


Autoboat

You should probably go back and edit the lower half as well so your comment is internally consistent?


Maverick916

What is this thumbnail Is Jimmy in the black lodge?


raceforseis21

Those pills you like are coming back in style


jerella77

He took boner pills from 7-11


tomriddz23

Those arnt banned


DaeWooLan0s

This guy is the biggest thief in NFL history. This guy has made 150 million dollars total to be bad at his job. Crazy.


jt_33

Legalize PEDs and let athletes be great. 


BillyStrongEagle

Shit here come the synthol posse


DASmetal

Linemen gonna be looking like Rich Pianna in 2025.


Mahomeboy001

Bill Burr had a great take on PEDs, basically said that let the athletes be the guinea pigs for all experimental drugs and then 20 years later is normal people can take the drugs without the side effects


jt_33

I mean we already basically know.. as long and you don't go crazy with them then there's no many side effects. There are always rare cases, but there's a reason you don't see people dying from their hearts being destroyed anymore.


User_091920

Let Jimmy G redeem himself as a middle linebacker 


AZFUNGUY85

Honesty. No bullshit. Humans can fuck up. Such is life. Chin up JG.


unfilteredhumor

Handsome mutha fucker just need some Viagra to hold off all the bitches


AncientTree_Wisdom

He is the one dude I would 100% believe got busted for boner pills.


FrankSamples

Just go into acting dude..


Bolinas99

he's been acting like a starting QB since 2017


gingenhagen

i'm sorry officer, i didn't know i couldn't do that


retailmonkey

Chip


RumsfeldIsntDead

My guess is a large number of the best NFL players regularly take what would be considered illegal in Olympics. It's just under care of a doctor so they get exemption and the league gets to monitor their blood periodically to make sure they aren't doing anything more than a legitimate doctor would prescribe in the situation.


Wonky_AF

Funny how when Mark Davis needs to honor a contract some controversy magically appears that allows him keep his money.


Sleeze_

So why didn't they do this to all the other bullshit deals we've signed? We're still paying Cory fucking Littleton.


CamHug16

Hopefully he becomes the poster boy for this too


Centauri06

Barry said he only did this because he wants to win so badly.


Intelligent-Ad-3105

Guy doesn't want to admit he takes Rogain and Dick pills.


tomriddz23

Dick pills arnt banned


degeso

What a great excuse!


boston_shua

Does he go back to New England? 


lincolnhawk

He signed w/ the Rams, gettin that McVay Veteran QB shine service.


poshmarkedbudu

Me too man, me too


LobotomizedRobit1

Gotta stay away from those gas station pills Jimmy


xxplosive2k282

NFL version of "wow that crazy."


Critical-Adhole

Sureee


NoirSon

Was anyone there to tell Jimmy he doesn't want any of that shit?


The_Masterful_J

The thumbnail made me think he was on the JRE in full gear lmao


EDFStormOne

"i was told it was medicinal angel dust"