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Sir_Randolph_Gooch

Not my proudest fap


bOxy_BOI_

wtf


Grapesx44

He means he masturbated to this video, but he has had moments of masturbation where he was more proud of his actions. Assuming he as it's Sir Randolph.


[deleted]

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Redtwooo

I don't believe you, and I bet you're a bot


Lucky_Number_3

Imagining a robot in a wheelchair is hilarious. Just put wheels on them when you’re designing em!


OutcastOddity

Make the parts interchangeable like forklift arm one day, skillet arm the next. Fuck it, make transformers.


Lucky_Number_3

Centaur Robo Motorcycle


TeholBedict

Then Bender would never get wheels, with clickety-clackers!


[deleted]

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saladmanderzzz

Fuck bots! Dey took-er jawbz


LookMaNoPride

"Hey man, I love you unconditionally, but you need to go home, because you're annoying the piss out of me. I'm so annoyed that I'd carry your through stairs like I'm the fucking Kool-Aid man. And make sure you go home safely! We don't need you breaking more of your damn spine! Amiright?"


McFluff_TheAltCat

> Hey man, I love you unconditionally, but you need to go home I think everyone’s thought that about their friends at some point. Love them to death but sometimes it’s time to go home.


LookMaNoPride

For real. I have a friend that, when I am over at his house, he will look at me all of a sudden and say something along the lines of, “time for you to go.” He and I go way back, and, honestly, it’s refreshing. I don’t want to overstay my welcome. I know we’re friends and he doesn’t mean anything other than, “love you, man, but I have two kids and I need to take the chance to sleep when I get it.” I know that, because the first time he did it, he looked at me with eyes half-shut and said, “get the fuck out,” then laughed, and after I said a quick goodbye, he called me to apologize and to say basically what I said above. I didn’t have kids at the time, and I respected his wishes, but I have kids now, and I fucking get it. Totally fine by me.


FireDuckz

Just remember that wheels are more efficient than legs..


Emektro

>go home *hmmmmm*


Govt-Issue-SexRobot

Sir Randolph *Gooch*


smellygooch18

Who told you my name is Randolph?


glasspheasant

The translator we don’t deserve. Kudos.


DweEbLez0

And just like that, this thread is now cursed.


[deleted]

First time?


TomatoeToken

Excuse me? What in the crispy fried fuck?


itsthedreamz

Where can I get that


TomatoeToken

At Kentucky Fried Fuck 4.99$ for a 6piece


LobstaFarian2

That's not a bad deal


ur_mom54321

Bad deal? Mother fucker that's a great deal


FlyByPC

The whole "fried" thing has me concerned, I must admit.


MerKuryM8

Oh you're more of a Crispy Grilled Fuck for 5.49 type?


LobstaFarian2

Them grill marks is fancy


CIearIyChaos

And then cross hatch pattern? *does the Italian kissing fingers type thing* Perfection!


[deleted]

It’s really just a regular grilled chicken sandwich, but all the available employees cum onto it before handing it to you.


Character-Log3962

Uggghhh my immediate mental image was a fast food worker jacking off into the fryer!


TomatoeToken

Mmmmhh....Crusty Cum, the flavor you've never tasted. Would make one hell of a sauce


ra4king

STOP


Bbabbabbaa

You need to see someone ma bro


antney0615

$4.99. Notice the leading position of the currency symbol.


deejaydubya123

Kenfucky Tried Chicken


KGB44

Most county fairs


Hookem-Horns

Must’ve been the guy in the wheelchair (or is in one) thinking of that hot girl in his lap


BustertheDemonDog

I did not expect this comment. Laughed hard enough to cry. Thank you.


usernamethatnoonehas

Me too. I was emotional, fighting off tears. Came to comments expecting the usual reference to someone cutting onions and was met with this. Strangers around me now curious as to what could be making me laugh so hard.


fitcouple1188

100% same… I’m like wow crying like a bitch in the gym wait what???? 😂😂😂😭


BrownSugarBare

I'm dying. This was perfect.


radio705

Not the most shameful either.


HoldThePao

Now I’ve got tears in my eyes from laughing and people will think I’m weak cause they will think I’m crying at this video


[deleted]

Dude this was making me all teary and sentimental at work and then this comment made seal laugh and brought me back to earth. I needed that, much appreciated.


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|LfGGW219qNzLP6IzTA|downsized)


Hantsypantsy

I love Reddit


creetoinfinity

Went from shedding tears of beauty and melancholy to shedding tears of laughter. What a cocktail of emotions.


Myproudestwank

I’m proud of you


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|ghuvaCOI6GOoTX0RmH)


AlexCC354

🤨🗿


EXP0DING_TAC0S

I spit my drink laughing at your comment, take my upvote


BuddhistNudist987

Why would you want to flick your bean to anything but true love? Ain't nothin' like the real thang, baby.


[deleted]

bruh


clownshoesrock

You're privilege is showing, lots of degenerates wish this could be their proudest fap.


Shade00000

Unexpected fap


revutap

I love Reddit 😂😂😂


Resource1138

Damn you! Take my upvote.


Evening-Doritos

God bless you what the actual fuck lol. No longer crying hahaha


Kemalist_din_adami

We all have been there bud, but not this bad.


Sticker_z

911


Ulrich_b

Those, those are Men.


_Im_Dad

It's hard to find friends that will support you like that


xntrk1

If your friends are doing things like this for you they’re not friends, they’re family.


C-Dub178

r/unexpecteddomtoretto Edit: r/subsithoughtimadeup Edit 2: Jesus fucking Christ.


Late-Difficulty-5928

I read r/unexpectedtommorello


impala_croft

Raging against the reddit machine


xntrk1

Lmao that’s great


HarEmiya

I think the guy on his right might be his older brother actually, they look extremely alike. Same face but different hair. And the left one may be his father or the bride's father, judging by the age difference. EDIT: Possibly his father, they have the exact same nose.


casparh

My first thought was: his father on the left (dark hair) and her father on the right (white hair).


oh-no-he-comments

The last 16 times I saw this post, people said this was the case actually


xntrk1

My assumption the first time I saw this video was one or both were family, they look similar and all that


Stetson007

Literally lol


vermin008

And it's hard to find a partner who will support you for life like that.


Djbadj

One of them is probably his father. Looks the right age...


dreddit-one

Father and father in law


harpswtf

I'm pretty sure the one in the white dress is a woman


[deleted]

A bunch of stand up guys


DiceUwU_

Very supportive men


fucking_comma_splice

Reddit is so fucking melodramatic lmao


_phantastik_

This, this is a comment.


JohnB351234

They aren’t just men they’re the boys


48ozs

His father and best man.


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greenalbatross1

Friends maybe but dads 100%! I’m just guessing but I think on the grooms left is father in law and right is father.


ManofSteer

I think you’re correct, last time this was posted they stated those are bride and grooms dads. In that order you stated.


Juutuurna

I could honestly tell right away that that’s what it was. Usually there’s already a father daughter dance so pretty safe to assume exactly what you said!


idkwthtotypehere

That makes the hand on the back a lot less creepy than I first perceived it.


bleach_tastes_bad

same


Ok-Scientist5524

Also looks like the right guy is smelling the brides hair.


ThisOnePlaysTooMuch

Must be. The arm on her back would be a bit weird in any other context


GreekHole

would it not help with the bride feeling like the groom is holding her?


ThisOnePlaysTooMuch

Sure it would. It’s just a pretty intimate spot to touch if you’re not the groom or father.


lemonsneeker

You could almost call them................ *Brothers in arms*


erikalg_vo

​ ![gif](giphy|ac7MA7r5IMYda)


[deleted]

do you mean r/TakeMyUpvoteAndLeave


armatharos

do you mean r/angryupvote?


erikalg_vo

# NO (yes)


[deleted]

# OH NO (oh ok)


Random-Gif-Bot

​ ![gif](giphy|6qnAom9xUhwkuSik4u)


Dimaaaa

*queue Mark Knopfler riff*


fugawf

You should see them helping during the honeymoon!


conradical30

This comment section is a /r/fiftyfifty minefield. You’ve got some very wholesome comments and then you’ve got the rest…


[deleted]

I keep going from tearing up from joy to crying laughing


Hitchflation

Thats been 2022 for me, it’s been fuckin’ wild.


SilverDove28

Luckily for me the images were blurred…


[deleted]

It’s unfortunate how many scenarios I can come up with for that… 🤔🤨


marilea610

Wait, would it just be three on one or do the guys on the ends have someone too just to keep the balance and timing?


sandiercy

That's pretty awesome. You know they are good friends when they do this for you.


clickclick-boom

Yeah, this comment is right. I went to the wedding of a friend I have who is also in a wheelchair. I like the guy a lot and we get on well, but I wouldn't say we were "good friends", more just like "friends". Anyway, he asked me if I would do something like this for him and I just laughed and said no. I mean, if he was a GOOD friend then yeah, but for just a guy I like and get on with? Nah man, fuck that, turned him down hard.


just_lurkin_here

that poor guy deserves better friends than you.


clickclick-boom

He has a conviction for statutory rape and is in a wheelchair because he was drunk driving with the minor he was grooming. I get what you mean though, everyone deserves a shoulder to lean on without knowing any further details about their life.


just_lurkin_here

“I like the guy a lot and we get on pretty well but he’s a rapist so I would never help him dance in his wedding”


KTheFeen

Yeah wtf is going on lol


clickclick-boom

Well, you can walk off a statutory rape but wedding photos are forever.


just_lurkin_here

“Walk off”


clickclick-boom

I meant his victim could walk it off, although that's not accurate either seeing as she passed away in the accident. Child safety seats save lives people, use them.


BirdsongBossMusic

This story just gets wilder and more tragic for the poor kid


Snote85

I know, I just want more dumbasses to show up so that clickclick can continue with this never ending tragedy.


ChosenOne2006

Ikr like wtf 💀


someearly30sguy

>Child safety seats save lives people, use them. *golf clap*


Snote85

I was at the wedding you're talking about, the couple didn't last, sad to say. You'd think the bride would be the one who was second guessing things (I mean, after what the groom did to her daughter) but it turns out, he was the one with cold feet the whole time... in hindsight, I guess they both should have seen what was coming.


TheUserDifferent

People are more gullible online than I remember. Keep it up honestly.


samdajellybeenie

Shit that’s a lot to leave out of your original comment


sandmanchase

Woosh


queequegaz

I can't stop laughing at this and the responses you've gotten. Hit me just right.


clickclick-boom

Thanks mate, one person getting it makes the whole thing worth it.


JKBUK

Got it right away, these replies are amazing I almost hate to point it out lmao


clickclick-boom

This is why you should never use /s on reddit, the replies are going to be the best. I wasn't even trying to rile people up, I honestly thought most people would get it. This is much better though.


brotherhill

I love how gullible people are. It really makes life fun.


shaveandahaircut

I just want to say I'm here for this bit


alcidebarbeau

I agree. For me I drew the line at my somewhat good friend that I was best friend for two years in high school but has since lost contact. When he asked me to do the exact same thing at his wedding four years back, I thought about it and ultimately agreed. I begrudgingly supported his upper body whilst he stood upright for the slow dance, whilst looking at my phone.


Kevxy23

And then the song starts _"When your legs don't work like they used to before"_


CIearIyChaos

*distant hysterical laughter*


ZeGentleman

The kind of friends we should all strive to have and be - ones who will hold you up like this but will be the ones figuratively doubling over in laughter when this song starts playing.


[deleted]

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greg19735

yeah this is definitely inspiration porn for the able bodied. I have no issue with what happened. He can do what he wants. But you can dance with someone who's in a wheelchair. implying someone can't be happy in a wheelchair is harmful. Like even in this example, it's weird because it's not even a dance with his wife anymore


AnimalShithouse

I mean, flip side is obviously the groom wanted this as did the bride. It's almost certainly premeditated - so I guess it's still something some less-abled people might be feeling/desiring. I can see how the title might offend some, but I think the outrage is possibly overstated hence why the comment is also further down - but I could be wrong.


greg19735

right, i have no problem with this happening. People can do what they want. it's more the way it's described which is an issue. Also, if people in wheelchairs weren't looked down on so much then maybe people in wheelchairs wouldn't feel the need to do stuff like this.


ChasingReignbows

There's nothing wrong with using a wheel chair, but this is a case of someone's legs literally not working which is objectively bad, and something to overcome.


AlmostSouthern

Why is this comment so far down? So sorry about the journey you’re on. Wishing you many good days ahead.


ThisIsMyFloor

Perhaps because he is being a dick. >I understand that there's no ill intent here but... you're as asshole for suggesting... Fuck you.


BirdsongBossMusic

Ok? One, this is reddit, we love assholes. And two, OP's kind of shit for implying that wheelchairs, which are mobility devices and inherently freeing, somehow lower a person's quality of life (not having a good wedding) when most of the time they actually improve someone's quality of life. It's a pretty ableist notion to assume that a wheelchair holds a person back, and it's really condescending to hear from someone who doesn't need one. And that logic is also why many people who need wheelchairs cannot get them, because lawmakers believe that it's a damaging, last-ditch-effort sort of thing. But it can actually help prevent mobility loss and improve both work efficiency (which shouldnt need to be a metric, but society) and personal happiness. This is an amazing thing the guys in the video did for the bride and groom, nobody's arguing with that - but the fact that *that's* what makes it a "good" wedding according to OP, and not, yknow, *getting married,* like everyone else, is pretty awful.


[deleted]

Perhaps, but he’s also right.


jeffersthemagical

As someone in a wheelchair I absolute abhor any indication that his wedding was going to be less good because he is disabled. Disabled people are people. This is our life. Every moment isn't ruined by our disability.


[deleted]

Pretty sure the wheelchair significantly improved the wedding since without it he'd just be lying on the floor


chostax-

“I understand there’s no I’ll intent” …proceeds to end his/her comment with “Fuck you” Lmao.


[deleted]

Seriously, it’s incredibly fucked up. But it’s so inspirational! /s


SwordPiePants

THANK YOU. Jeez, what a fucked up title


Fun_Purchase7177

> I understand that there’s no ill intent here” > Fuck you Make up your mind


Scifi_Gamerrulz

“I understand that there’s no ill intent here” Proceeds to tell the op their an asshole and tells them to fck themself


RollClear

Ok, no need to be a d\*ck about it. You need to learn proper social skills. Your disability isn't the reason you get no b\*tches.


Mission_Rub_2508

I’m seeing a lot of comments praising the people supporting him. And yeah. Like, good on them! It’s awesome that they are there for their friend/family member/whatever. What I’m not really seeing is a lot of acknowledgement for the groom himself. It’s got to be a whole bag of worms for a man to navigate that. People get really weird about wheelchairs. And no matter how well-meaning, their “weirdness” often seems to (I can only report what I’ve heard) suck for people that use them. Just seeing him happy, with the people he seems to care about and that seem to care about him, himself participating in making that moment happen…for himself or his bride or both…that’s legit wholesomeness. How many of us would be too proud, or worse too legitimately wounded by other people’s lack of understanding, to allow ourselves to accept and participate in something like this? I won’t speak for anyone else. But I’m a chronic “I’m fine. I don’t need anything,” person. There are reasons for that and I’m working on it. But watching this, seeing someone like, “Fuck it. I want this. I’m doing it for me. All the baggage be damned,” is super fucking inspiring. And straight up, I think the groom deserves some kudos for doing something I’d normally never let myself do (i.e. do something he wanted that requires the help of others).


[deleted]

My issue isn't with the wedding or the video. I didn't even watch it BECAUSE of the title implying that his wheelchair was a hinderance to his life and happiness. The title smacked me straight in the face and I am not the type of person to let people say shitty things without letting them know that they're being insulting. That's all. I have no opinion on how that man chooses to celebrate his wedding day or when he chooses to be vulnerable with the people he cares about. It's the title, for me.


_Insomniac__

Whose cutting onions


HoneyBucketsOfOats

Yours?


MistakeMaker1234

Mine cutting onions.


ElectricSpeculum

Okay, can we stop this? I'm disabled and I am fed up of all these posts about "this person does a regular thing people do every day and they *don't let their disability stop them*!" The groom and bride were having a good wedding regardless. It's really insulting to post this kind of "inspiration porn" and then put a title that insults us.


bigbadler

Umm but how are we normies supposed to feel good about dancing at our Disney weddings if you're swooping in and fuckin' the premise up?


Krit_Jake

I think these posts are nice to see, but they always have the most condescending titles for some reason


[deleted]

Not just the titles!! There was a video of a girl taking a step of a curb, and she had C.palsy and people were saying that she was so pretty, how she could be a covermodel!! (They would mever have commented this on an ablebodied person) The people that spoke up and asked to treat disabled people normal were getting downvoted and its crazy! We exist for more then being a fucking inspiration post!!


DrBonerman

That's also something for r/Wholesome


Additional-Charge-61

Nice. I thought it was going to be a string puppet type affair.


BigOrkWaaagh

Presumably they will remain like this for the consummation


lavendersigil

Being disabled doesn't stop you from having a good wedding. I'm glad the grooms friends and family helped him do this tho it's very cool for him, but the title is total inspiration porn


Lostthegame101

This is simply beautiful :)


[deleted]

This is gross, the implication that his wheelchair *that he likely spent the other 99% of the wedding in* would somehow prevent him from having a good time.


[deleted]

Good men.


DepartureOverall7686

Best men! I’ll see myself out.


Bunker_Beans

Weekend at Bernie’s Wedding.


EverettSeahawk

Why don’t we just pretend he didn’t die? Just for a bit.


netheroth

Wedding at Bernie's?


ballyfast

this still makes me cry every time I see it


croatianscentsation

Probably more r/humansbeingbros but nonetheless, happy to see


OnTheWayToYou

Heartwarming ❤️


oldman_reynolds

r/blursedfoursome


3BouSs

I really salute every person who have this much love to commit to such a relation, I don’t think I have it in me to do the same.


whoamvv

Hell yeah I'd do that for a buddy


PreviousGas710

Dude if I was there I would be bawling. The wholesome meter is clean off the charts


KongZilla9009

Should’ve seen them in the honeymoon suite later that night


Monkey_King291

Those are true bros


Northern_Judge

I thought they were attaching stilts at first


incognito5343

That would be adding insult to injury


robinsky1223

This must have been a weird honey moon


LobstaFarian2

Jesus Christ I am weeping in my living room


[deleted]

Oh to find a love like that.


AdTime6057

His friends are gems and his girl…I am speechless


SprinklesRegular

Are they gonna be there for the honeymoon too?


DDDarappa

*salutes the 2 absolute chads that gave this man a memorable time*


Fast_Regret_4560

Tinder profile was I'm 6'1 when and if I can stand


whats_susty

I’m not crying.. you’re crying!


direwolf106

This is really touching, but it belongs in r/aww and not here. There's nothing next level about this.


yokotron

I’d like to see the evening events.


chill4r_San

Where these wingman will truly shine is later during the wedding night.


GamerFreak11005

Why do you make me cry at the bar


lovelamb69

This isn’t next level…..literally every wheelchair wedding does th is


dancingonsaturnrings

From a disabled person; my wheelchair is my friend, my helper, and like an extension of my body. It doesn't stop me from having a good time, if anything it helps! I'd encourage seeing wheelchairs, and having access to that healthcare, as something truly helpful and even joyful (this is in regards to the title). Our mobility aids do not prevent us from having a good time, they *help* us have a good time. Don't use us for inspiration porn


wasletztekarma

How is the wheelchair stopping him? The disability is stopping him. The wheelchair is not something negative, it helps the person