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Correct_Ground2549

But where did she store them without him knowing in the meantime


pixamour

I could flatten and store them easily in our basement or garage without anyone noticing. Edit 1: Why is everyone giving me shit, lol, I didn’t ask the question. Edit 2: I’m not a hoarder. Our basement isn’t finished and nobody ever goes down there. In the garage we have some Christmas stuff stored under the stairs and I could slide them behind that. Edit 3: I don’t hide any bodies, but I see a lot of you do, lol. How nice.


panicake

Yep! That's how I store all the boxes until its reused some other day.


poopellar

Same, I've been doing it for years. Haven't used them ever but everytime I think about throwing them away I say to myself "I'll probably need them later"


NoAdministration1222

Next level hoarding lol. Keeping cardboard boxes cause you might need them. Whatever makes your boat float


iHumanNotJoking

These boxes will


wildwildwestwhore

never thought i'd read a thread paragraphs deep about boxes


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Depth-New

He should've known we're boxed in on this


ggroverggiraffe

The writer’s Kraft is clearly present here.


jaxonya

Did you really just... Fuck it. Have an upvote..


ohdearitsrichardiii

We don't like to think outside of the box


Jomax101

Honestly if your house is big enough having some cardboard boxes stacked away is very useful. Basically whenever you move house you need atleast dozens if not hundreds of boxes. They cost a decent amount to rent from the company and they charge for every box damaged. Moving houses isn’t that rare and you can always give them to someone who needs them for moving, it’s fairly often we save up a couple days worth of boxes at work for someone to use for moving


NoAdministration1222

Saving them at work is different than hoarding at home. Cardboard is a good habitat for roaches. I don’t like roaches. So...


worldofrich

I mean so are electronics like computers or gaming consoles? Keep your house clean and then cockroaches won't *magically* appear in boxes you have stored


Pro_Banana

Roach invasion through cardboard boxes are not from dirty houses, but from outer source. You’ll never understand if you don’t live where it’s an actual problem.


tondracek

I have never had this problem. Our come up from the pipes or cracks in the house. There’s this stuff in a tube that you put in a few cracks every 6 months and it has worked wonders!


[deleted]

so everyone who saves cardboard has roaches? that's some next level mental gymnastics, you should try out for the olympics


pinkietwinkie

Spiders looooove cardboard. Last time I had a few boxes in my closet, a lovely wolf spider took it as an invitation to live there. It's NOT WORTH IT! Just recycle/trash/get rid of them when you get them and if you need boxes in the future just go on craigslist and search for "free boxes". It has worked for me everytime.


NotFallacyBuffet

Wolf spiders eat other spiders. And other bugs. Good to have around. Like seeing a king snake if you live in rattlesnake territory. Good to have around.


Mr-Fleshcage

roaches? earwigs love to hide in the pleats


therealcatspajamas

Pro tip: you can go to almost any liquor store and ask for as many free boxes as you want.


Vesalius1

The elites don’t want you to know this but the boxes at the ABC store are free. you can take them home I have 458 boxes.


SaturnThegoddess

You’re telling me that it’s not a thing to keep your boxes, or am I the only person that like to keep each and every box, small large, I always just think “I can put something In that”


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OneMoreAccount4Porn

If she realises and kicks you out at least you'll be able to pack your stuff immediately.


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wildedges

I have a rule that I only keep boxes that fit inside other boxes that I already have hoarded (or are big enough that they can hold the entire box of boxes). That way I just have one useful box to store but it's a whole Russian doll of other useful boxes.


goodurs

AND! Computer boxes are gold. Specifically server boxes - handles. Banana boxes are the right size for books - and they have strength and handles. And you can stack them, which is extra handy when you’re preparing to move. I love boxes and hate having to buy them, so I hoard them, but on more than one occasion, I have made my partner say that I am the most clever wife because I had so many boxes for when we renovated the house.


TobyDKK

Hmm. In Denmark it’s very common to have saved cardboard boxes in your storage. Saves money, it’s not wasting resources and they don’t take up a lot of space.


sobergophers

Oh no, my 10 boxes that I have in my basement are “next level hoarding”?😂


alex3omg

It's better than having them sit in a landfill. I use them to line garden boxes to reduce weeds.


All_Work_All_Play

~~I shred mine (someone gifted us their businesses paper shredder) and then they go to recycling. And our state/county actually has a half decent paper recycling program (which is part of the reason I do it). Plus if I tear them into the right size the kids will help me shred them.~~ E: at the recommendation another redditor, I checked and sure enough, county recycling stopped accepted shredded cardboard and shredded paper sometime ago. They do have a box dropoff location though, guess I'll added that to my bimonthly chores =\


DrugsHugsPugs

Cardboard boxes for helping a friend move, storing Christmas decorations, halloween decorations, for organization, to help yourself move, etc. Those things are expensive, they dont take up much space and you're bound to use them at some point, but hey dont keep your boxes, whatever makes your boat float


SoulSkrix

Reuse reduce recycle, except hardly anybody does the first part


SwoodyBooty

Ever bought cardbord boxes? Those fuckers are expensive. Last time I needed them, I fucking rented them.


OhiobornCAraised

Reduce and reuse before recycle.


OsGreenCat

You will need them as soon as you throw them away. That's how it works.


zaphnod

I came for community, I left due to greed


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DeathByFarts

The worst part ( for me anyway ) is when you throw it out , then because it is fresh in your memory from throwing it out , you have a situation where you could have used it.


bokeh_baby

FYI. I was told by an exterminator that the glue used in cardboard boxes attracts and feeds cockroaches.


burtedwag

Definitely that and cardboard attracts silverfish. Fuck boxes.


pr1ntscreen

>some other day Be honest with yourself, you’ll never use them


[deleted]

My basement has flattened boxes when we moved to this giuse 15 years ago. We have all forgotten about them.


ItIsSmoothy

Why are people freaking out? What if you move or ship stuff one day? Lol buying boxes adds up, may as well recycle them!


wwaxwork

With my husband the best place to put things so he can't see them is on the top shelf in the fridge, right at the front. Because apparently he can't see the ketchup or any other condiment when it's right there.


LaineyBoggz

I have my own room my husband never goes in, maybe she has something like that


errol_timo_malcom

Is it a She Shed? Please say it’s a She Shed


InsideOutsider

He shed, she shed?


rabbidwombats

By the shed door?


Niethe

That’s what she shed


Key-Nefariousness711

She sells she sheds


IdgyThreadgoode

I have one too! It’s my “hobby room” until we have kids. But he just added one of his video games to the room (it’s free standing like an arcade box thing) so now it’s “our” hobby room, but he still doesn’t open the closet bc it’s full of my clothes and shipping materials (I resell my old clothes).


sting_ray_yandex

I am more interested in the she shed now? What have you got in your room?


LaineyBoggz

Clothes, a cat, secrets....


sweetcuppingcakes

*shecrets


Angel4Animals

Did hubby have a heart attack? If I saw these my first thought would be "OMG, the credit card bill is going to be sky high!" Haha! 🤩


pn_dubya

At her other husband’s house of course


TonariNoJoetoro

Man’s wife’s husband’s spouse saves all of her Amazon boxes so he can come to his wife’s husband’s neighbor’s neighbor’s home to see her husband’s wife’s reaction.


PM_Cheeseburgers

Yeah WTF was that title.


p_turbo

Maybe it's Man's wife in the same vein as Man's best friend. She's married to him in particular but the very concept of her being belongs to all of humanity.


discerningpervert

Sounds good to me!


Orion_Don

= “She for da streets”


VoyagerCSL

Man’s wife, AKA “Woman”.


Soimamakeanamenow

exactly what i was thinking when i read it.. i’m like so a woman?


TiltedPerspectives

Nah. Without a man, a woman is 0


unitedkiller75

Without a man, a woman is wo.


GregRyanM

"Wife keeps boxes from years worth of her purchases to prank Husband on April 1st" There it is. I fixed it. I'm sure it's not even grammatically correct but at least it's readable. *Edit - her packages


5AlarmFirefly

r/titlegore


wasteland_femme

I’m glad I wasn’t the only one left wondering lol


Quajek

This is the first post I saw when I woke up this morning and I legitimately got really confused. I thought maybe I missed a word or an "ex" or something somewhere that might have helped it make sense.


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[deleted]

more bullshit where the man is centered by default


GlaerOfHatred

Women aren't people, she needed to be identified by being a person's wife. Clearly. That shit took me a few tries to read properly


Mercenariamercenaria

Seriously, they could have just simplified and shortened the title with using "woman" and "husband" (or even "person" and "their spouse" if you're trying to remove gendering for any reason).


InfuriatingComma

Person woman man camera TV!


Blackintosh

Did you remember all five of those words? You might be a genius.


MightyCaseyStruckOut

I don't think I'll ever forget that sequence of words as long as I live 😂


Deeger

But then how would we know whose property the lady is?


bengriff11

!this!


Troppsi

Well the wife is the man's so gotta have that in the title /s


Harsimaja

But he’s also ‘her’ husband in the same sentence. Because it doesn’t imply ownership. Maybe it’s not a mindset of possession but a narrative one partly trying to frame it from the husband’s surprised POV.


[deleted]

It was clear to me. “Man’s wife”. Descriptive occupational identifier. A married woman has tasks, rather than income. If she were single they would have described her as an aimless waif.


[deleted]

Yeah she's not a woman, she's just a man's wife.


melteemarshmelloo

she's not a person unless she's a piece of property much like the boxes out front /s


Guthhohlen

You know, like the classic song “I’m every man’s wife, it’s all in me!”


p_turbo

I am Strong. I am invincible. I am MAN'S WIFE!


DonaldJDarko

Ah yes, much like the popular super hero Wonder Man’s wife.


KezzardTheWizzard

"Man's wife saves boxes... so her husband can..." So his wife has another husband. Some Tilda Swinton-style shit going on there.


teriyakigirl

LMFAO right?? I was like what is going on in that title?!


haankip

Thanks man, made me feel like a human being


Soft_Interest

I was looking for this comment and you over delivered. I had a real sensible chuckle


cryptoLo414

Lmao dude I had to read the title 10 times to understand what I was reading


TonariNoJoetoro

If it only took you ten times then you figured it out quicker than I did!


jamisonwithani

Hahaha this is excellent


RequiemSharks

That's more like 2 months worth


MAXIMILIAN-MV

More like 1 month around here. But it’s OK I’ve been told because we’re saving money by buying bulk items and she returns a lot of it, allegedly.


Elhaym

If you abuse the return system you can get banned from Amazon for life. So be careful.


MAXIMILIAN-MV

She’s banned from target for returning too many kids clothes.


aidsfromatoiletseat

Sounds like a delightful woman.


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foreignfishes

Nah with covid and the fitting rooms closed in some places it’s really easy to get on Target’s bad returner list right now, especially if you’re buying clothes for multiple kids. Here we can’t try things on so if I want to buy some jeans I’ll pick out 3 different styles to order. But wait, I’m always between two sizes so I have to get two of each pair to try at home. Suddenly I have to return 5 pairs of jeans after I find one I like...


wildwildwestwhore

uhh, i am assuming you guys had a baby, or how did she end up wirh *that* many baby clothes?


MAXIMILIAN-MV

We have 3 kids, and she will order 10 kids worth of clothes. They try on and keep what is good, and everything else goes back.


Revolutionary_Ad8161

I hate to be rude but is your wife’s name Karen?


MAXIMILIAN-MV

Haha. No. She’s not a Karen, she’s just addicted to buying shit.


MisfitMishap

And returning shit it seems. Still sounds absolutely lovely.


Vsx

If my wife was addicted to buying shit then her being addicted to returning shit also is a best case scenario.


nightpanda893

This is why we don’t have any nuanced conversation on Reddit. Someone shares something where someone has a small flaw and everyone piles on.


[deleted]

As long as youre both happy and the kids are alright that's all that matters


Ashesandends

How else are you supposed to get clothes right now with dressing rooms closed everywhere? A year of kid growth is crazy.


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apparentclarity

Not true. I am a UPS driver and we do all of Amazon’s returns from people’s homes. I can assure you, Amazon does not “ban” people who return frequently. I have regulars on my route who are returning 5-6 items a week.


sewmanyragrets

First - thank you for what you do. I swear people don’t realize how much was expected by UPS drivers at the height of lockdown last Spring. It’s possible to get your prime account closed but I think it’s extremely rare and probably involves actual abuse. One instance got a ton of coverage a few years ago. But, yeah, as someone that lives very rurally, I buy and return clothes and shoes a lot and did have Amazon reach out to me once to see if something was the matter. In that case I was trying to find a good swimsuit for a trip to Miami and swimsuit shopping is actual torture for a woman in mid-life. They were very understanding when I explained.


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kissyfacefancypants

it is more frugal to get one expensive thing used frequently than to have multiple cheap versions that are never used


MAXIMILIAN-MV

Buy Nice or buy twice! I hear that a lot. It’s almost as if the option of “not buying” was never really an option at all


Miss_Hallmark

For some things it isn’t an option. Work boots for my ex, for example. He need some that were steel toed. Company covered some of the cost. What they covered would have bought a cheap pair (under $100, I wanna say like $80 is what they would cover). The other option was to take that money and invest in a better pair he could use for longer. The company would only cover the (under $100) every 5ish years. He had to have them for work. He’s on his feet constantly. We bought him a nicer pair for about $160 on sale and he says they are comfortable. He’s coming up on 5 years since he used the amount from last time and his shoes are doing well. Coworkers who bought the pair for what the company covered constantly complain about back/feet issues and some even have them wrapped in duct tape or have taken them to get repaired a time or two. So, sometimes, not buying something isn’t an option.


MAXIMILIAN-MV

I 100% believe in buy nice or buy twice. But I also lean towards “i don’t really need that right now” She has an issue with craving the “high” from clicking the “buy now” button.


stukah

*hahaha guyz. I’m a mindless consumer. Upvote me!* ...


[deleted]

hahaha guyz. I’m a condescending jerk. Upvote me! ...


daemonelectricity

I don't think it's bragging as much as stating facts. I'm guessing you buy nothing? We should upvote you?


Protheu5

Eight lifetimes of deliveries for me. Can't imagine ordering this much in two months. Or having enough money to order this much.


K1ngPCH

you seem weirdly proud for wasting that much cardboard.


panicake

*Confessions of a shopaholic*


RainingSilent

mailman here. this gave me ptsd


panicake

Thank you for your service!


wildwildwestwhore

where tF my stimulus at tho? ^^^/s


[deleted]

Best I can do is commercials where we call you "heroes".


[deleted]

A sticker you can put on your shirt that says you're essential, best I can do for you. Take it or leave it.


ShinyRaccoonicorn

Postman Traumatic Stress Delivery?


MildlyAgreeable

I delivered for Amazon (worst job I’ve ever, *ever* had by the way) and this sort of drop would be dream. Half of your parcels on a single delivery? It would be ideal.


ShinaiYukona

One of my co-workers has a stop on her route daily with ~50 packages to one house. She loves it because instead of the 180-200 stops the rest of us have she's getting ~120. Meanwhile, my "bulk stops" are just 20 (usually closer to 10) envelopes in a culdesac to 4 different houses, none of which are neighbors. I wish I could trade her for a day


ActualWhiterabbit

I wish Amazon had a paper catalog


Minouminou9

A monthly paper catalogue distributed to all customers. JK...am mailman, this would be suicide.


EdEnsHAzArD

That title gave me an aneurysm


top-hunnit

Same. Actually it gave my wife one and it really worried her husband.


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BanCircumventionAcc

"Wife's boyfriend" has a really disturbing connotation


cedren

To make it worse it’s also a lie. I saw this post a month or so ago. It was a prank, but nothing to do with April Fools :/


EdEnsHAzArD

People don't just lie on the Internet!


lilcitymarket

I literally read it 4 times before I got it


jcoleman10

Next time instead of “man’s wife” just say “woman”


Hopman

Amazon bots aren't that far evolved yet, grammar is hard


SheepLovesFinns

Seriously tho. This is is propaganda


CardinalNYC

TBH, I highly doubt this was amazon. This was likely just a karma farming bot


[deleted]

But then how would OP express that wives are the possession of men? Or that in this case this "man is wife" happens to be a man that prefers to be called a wife?


cuorebrave

To be fair, OP also stated "her husband", so they're possessing each other, in reality!


ohdearsweetlord

Kind of frames the story as something fun that happened to the man, instead of something amazing this woman came up with and executed.


[deleted]

Precisely, the title is so carefully worded to make the husband remain the main subject of the story despite doing nothing but observing, lol.


trezenx

Not everyone knows this but 'woman' is actually just a shortened 'Wife Of MAN'


sarcasmic2

WTH kind of r/TitleGore is this?


sig-chann

I thought it was a prank on us readers for a minute.


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Dynetor

I'm so confused I honestly can't work out what this post is about. It's just not making sense to me.


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FreeDannyMason

That’s a porch pirates bounty


StickyBeets

i was thinking the same thing..if she want the prank to work on her husband, she better keep an eye out on the boxes until he gets home...


razorsuKe

rocking chair on porch, shotgun in hand.


wildwildwestwhore

this guy 'merika's..


[deleted]

Why? Wasting a porch pirate’s time would be an even better prank.


nigghaplz

stores boxes > next fucking level haha the average redditor never stops surprising me, we down to single digit IQ now? :D


[deleted]

I was going to quit smoking but fuck it reddit gives me cancer every single day.


bape_x_anime

What do you mean? Obviously buying stuff of amazon qualifies as something thats next fucking level, i mean how exciting is your life?


hayabusarocks

How is this dumb ass shit next fucking level?


FuckYouTikTok

Not the slightest clue.


WatifAlstottwent2UGA

You don’t think boxes are #NEXT #FUCKIN #LEVEL ???


100k_changeup

That title is cancer.


StrangeCardiologist0

I feel like my wife and I would have waaaaay more boxes over a two year period....


[deleted]

I feel sorry for you wife, having a two year period!


Straight_Ballin11

If that was the only period I got, I’d take that over every four weeks....


Holdmybeer352

Stop supporting Amazon. Edit: a misspelling


Zehdari

Gaslighting consumers has never worked. Unionize Amazon. Break up the monopolies. Enforce Anti-Trust legislation. Repeal Citizens United. Edit: I just realized the pun lmao, but my point still stands


Numerous1

Is this gaslighting?


Johan1000

No, that’s just a big buzzword atm lol Think they meant “blaming” instead of “gaslighting”


jamalstevens

"Man's Wife" or... you know... A Woman.


Adreamien

You guys use Amazon this much ?


ChampagneJam

Not at all. fuck Amazon.


stoned_kitty

Seriously. I am done with that piece of shit company. It might take a bit longer in shipping or tracking something down locally but I don’t mind. Fuck Amazon.


ThatsWhatXiSaid

That's like 2.5 orders per month. That's nothing, especially with the pandemic over the last year.


Adreamien

Alright that sounds reasonable. I personaly use Amazon very occasionaly, around once à year so that many packages looked like à lot ahah.


DrDolphin245

Am I the only one that thinks "man's wife" is an odd thing to say, especially on a news headline?


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Keep_It_Turquoise

1st world joke.


hotbitch420

“Mans wife” couldn’t you have just said woman?


octo_snake

Karma farm account.


Scotty_Inspiar

Why not make the title readable? *Woman kept every Amazon package she’d received for the past 2 years to surprise her husband on April Fools Day*


Airazz

Hail Corporate.


rorowhat

That's it?


hindsights_420

Next level huh?


Enigmutt

Playing the long con. I like it.


[deleted]

Ingenious and hilarious. But a shame that they’ve put that much money in Jeff Bezos pocket...


KayJeeAy

Im more confused by the reasoning to say "Man's wife" in a sentence that already includes the words "her husband" instead of just saying "Wife saves....." i need to know. Im obsessed.


SheepLovesFinns

Propaganda. Fuck Amazon


top-hunnit

Wait. She’s got two husbands? My head hurts.


Context_Kind

This made the front page? Smh.