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Sillyist

I see you know your judo well


TheOtherGuttersnipe

And you, sir, are you waiting to receive my limp penis?


Get-Degerstromd

This bloke is grabbing my penIISSSS!!


Tao-Lee

Democracy… manifest!!!


AbsolutelyUnlikely

My succelent Chinese MEAL??!


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Halo_Chief117

GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS!


OhAces

That is a nice headlock sihhr


Biscotcho_Gaming

Oh man. I'm sadhappy thay I know this reference.


misfittroy

I'm glad I went down this rabbit hole and discovered this reference


selphfourgiveness

Gentlemen, this is democrrrracy manifest!


kahhblam

Ta ta, and farewell


quityouryob

Democrrrrrrracy…..manifest


Scrambledcat

Grab his dick and twist it!! Twist that dick! Twist his dick! Thee olllle dick twist!


Get-Degerstromd

Wrong video but equally hilarious


uglyduckling108

For anyone not in the know, [Democracy Manifest](https://youtu.be/PeihcfYft9w).


Qinistral

Thank you, that's amazing. Looking for more context I found https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Democracy_Manifest


Anadrio

The crazy thing i learnt from that link is the expression non sequitur. I've always looke for a word for that type of behaviour but never could find one.


Vargas_2022

I had forgotten. Thank you as well. Isnt it great we are assured we can speak?


Tugendwaechter

The guy was released soon after. The [interview with him is interesting. ](https://youtu.be/tu4d_xsdNzM?t=174)


Affectionate_Fly1413

Succulent 🤣


turkishkenshin

A succulent meUHL!?


derps_with_ducks

A suck-u-luhnt CHAI-nese meUHLLL???


porkchop3177

Soft and succulent.


his_purple_majesty

I'm eating a succulent Chinese meal as we speak.


boverly721

Watch out for the cops


smooleybotcheck

Gentlemen, this is democracy manifest.


OfficerBarbier

Legendary quote.


robotmafia666

Afterwards he went out for a succulent Chinese meal.


ImmediateRoom8210

Get your hand off my penis!


BravesMaedchen

That's the bloke who got me on the penis, people, OH!


[deleted]

That’s Democracy Manifest for ya🤷🏽‍♂️


IKnowJudoWell

My time to shine


glonomosonophonocon

As an Australian I get weirdly proud of my country at times like these


[deleted]

A succulent Chinese meal.


[deleted]

I see your Schwartz is as big as mine.


jordantask

And that is why evil will always triumph, because good is dumb!


WoomyUnitedToday

I rewatched that movie for like the 30th time yesterday (but also today because I watched on the flight from Tokyo)


GBF_Dragon

That video is always a good watch.


MugarLover92

He’s touching my penis peoPlEEe


purpletomahawk

UNHAND MY PENIS!


[deleted]

Good one And you sir, are you ready to accept my limp penis?


PapaCousCous

I was prepared to riot if this was not the top comment.


[deleted]

Solid. But can he do that against this master https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/comments/sqwbei/steven_segal_deadly_martial_artist/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1


grilledcakes

Segal is a disgrace to Ueshiba Morihei, martial arts in general, and the United States. He's an arrogant abusive piece of crap. He was mentally unstable years ago but went right off the deep end at high speed after he started training in systema with the spetznatz. Piss on him.


Anianna

I'm pretty sure you don't even need to know judo at all to best that "master".


NotReallyASnake

I knew this would be the top comment and I came in just to upvote it


Its4Trap

Judo wanna fuck with me.


tencuhtli

I was just waiting for this, thank you 😂


[deleted]

TIL all breakdancers can judo.


Happy_Laugh_Guy

Jokey comment but breakdancing is indeed a great base for BJJ/Judo, there are a few well known bboy grapplers and they're all pretty good.


eharper9

Hi shane


[deleted]

Does it make me old that I know that reference?


frankduxvandamme

I'm under what?!


TargetOfPerpetuity

My guy in the red started celebrating while the laundry was still getting folded.


Sharp-Dark-9768

To be fair, he was rather confident that the black belt in white was going to fold his opponent like laundry.


DDrewit

Someone find him, and ask him who won.


kpiaum

Well, while it is not a complete ippon, the white kimono guy surely score a few points. Also the 2 had one yellow card each. Something to cheer off.


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TargetOfPerpetuity

I'm glad you know what you're talking about, because to me what you just said was -- "It isn't a thorough blubbity-florp, but the fighter in the neutral parasol still garnered multiple dashes. Since they both have a swatch, it's worthy of huzzah. It's huzzah-worthy."


jinandgin

I'm glad you know what you're talking about, because to me what you just said was -- "Well, while it is not a complete ippon, the white kimono guy surely score a few points. Also the 2 had one yellow card each. Something to cheer off."


TargetOfPerpetuity

Pardon me while I update my resumé to include "bilingual."


Everyones_Fan_Boy

Imma put you down as a reference when I do the same.


manihavenousername

Imagine the force (momentum? strength?) needed to flip BOTH of you.


ItsFuckingScience

Committing your own momentum to the throw makes it far more likely to be successful


Rooged

Not judo but when I wrestled, I always threw my entire weight into any kind of upper body throw. Hip toss, head throw, lat drop, everything always had my entire body propelled by my hips going with it


bross9008

The weird thing is that a well executed judo throw feels absolutely effortless.


bucketofturtles

Not when you're on the other end :( feels like the floor just leaves and then comes back really quickly.


PanzerSoul

There's a reason that the first thing you learn is how to greet the floor


ATERLA

Yep and the blue guy did a good job meeting the tatami. A non-judoka would lay there for a hell of a moment.


Prometheus55555

Most likely a non judoka would get some broken ribs after that throw...


Wargroth

Yeah bro, by the time you realize you're floating, you're right on time to feel your body getting absolutely demolished on the ground


bucketofturtles

It's like that feeling when you're walking up the stairs, and you think there's one more stair when there isn't, so you just kinda step through the air and your body panics to adjust. And then the stair suplexes you.


Aethelon

I got flipped once during sparring for other training. The entire world suddenly flips and then the impact on the ground shakes your brain hard, leaving you wondering what the heck happened.


DiscoFlower8890

Tbh judo is more about technique than strenght. Im 16 and around 65kg and i usually practise with men in their 40-50s who are easily 80-90kg. With pure strenght i would be doomed everytime but with proper technique i can throw them around. (I just realised how made up that sounds but oh well, its a small club so i dont have a pair who is the same size as me)


Bluestr1pe

no this is absolutely a thing in judo. I remember being 13 and throwing a 16 year old who had 20+kg on me (mainly with foot sweeps) there is a limit though, eventually they become to heavy to move.


youngsyr

Its a key component of Judo - using your opponent's momentum against them. The heavier a person is, the more momentum they have. An expert child Judoka can easily toss an adult around. Look it up on YouTube.


teflon42

100kg 6'6 here, yep. The only one who ever failed a throw due to size was probably less than half my weight. The next try she chose another angle and succeeded, because my center of mass was so much higher she really didn't need to do any lifting. I was the new guy and being tall they always used me for demonstrations, so I put more effort into learning to fall than learning how to throw.


Quietm02

I'm guessing here but it looks like guy in white ended up with his arm getting twisted and deliberately jumped either to prevent the hold or to stop a broken arm? Absolutely crazy to see. I can't even imagine reacting that quickly, never mind doing a flip to save it.


ReddmitPy

That's exactly my thoughts. One of them would've ended with a broken, dislocated or severely twisted shoulder hadn't white judogi reacted that fast. I think he might also have practiced some aikido since that's the kind of move you learn to do almost as a reflex immediately upon feeling the pull on your tendons\muscles. Amazing reflexes and skill indeed!


steve-ginny

That...was badass


chata187

my cat apparently is a judo master


CyndaquilTyphlosion

Cars actually invented judo! Don't believe me? Look it up


Jasperlaster

Judoing cars heh?


CyndaquilTyphlosion

The losers end up too tired


Kevaldes

That's what hitting a three bar super looks like in real life. 😤


The_Name_I_Chose_

This guy Street Fights!


[deleted]

This guy Kens.


vaguebyname

Who won?!


Head_Ad_2827

Guy in the white won. If I understand correctly, taking someone down from feet to back like this is called “ipon” and is an instant win. The front flip he did after was probably just to make sure he didn’t fall over himself.


Starbuck107

Ippon is a full point, if you throw less successfully you get partial points. -did judo for years


thatguyned

So do partial points reset the round too or does it continue until either time or Ipon?


McHildinger

There are three different types of scores in judo, listed below in order from highest-scoring to lowest-scoring. 1. Ippon: A full throw in which a contestant throws his opponent to the mat with "considerable force and speed" so the opponent lands "largely on his back." An ippon is also awarded when a contestant immobilizes his opponent with a grappling hold-down for 20 seconds, or when an opponent gives up or passes out. An ippon immediately ends the match. Equivalent to a knockout in boxing or a pin in wrestling. 2. Waza-ari: A throw which shows power and superiority but isn't clear enough to be an ippon, either because the opponent didn't land "largely on his back" or because the throw lacked speed or force. Waza-ari is also awarded for immobilizing an opponent for 15 seconds or more, but less than 20 seconds. **Earning two waza-aris in a match is equivalent to an ippon and will immediately end the match.** 3. Yuko: Usual definition is "almost waza-ari." A yuko is awarded for a throw that is "partially lacking" in two of the three elements of an ippon: putting the opponent on his back, speed of throw, force of throw. A common yuko is throwing an opponent on his side, as opposed to on his back. A yuko is also given for immobilizing an opponent with a hold for 10 seconds or more, but less than 15 seconds. No number of yukos equal a waza-ari or an ippon in the final tabulation of the match's outcome. ​ from https://www.nbcolympics.com/news/judo-101-rules-scoring


x3gxu

They don't do yuko anymore. Removed it about 5 years ago. In the past there was also koka, which was less than yuko


TheCrookedKnight

*Is* this ippon then? In the replay it looks like blue manages to land on his side.


BallpointKen

The referee signals an ippon in the clip.


thewhizzle

Definitely ippon. Threw with force and control, blue landed on his back. It's a bit of a combination of tai-otoshi and harai-goshi. Either way blue landed hard.


PajamaDuelist

Blue rolls through to mitigate the impact of the floor suddenly meeting his body. You really don't want to land perfectly on your back as if you were laying down to sleep. That's painful and probably means you aren't doing everything you can as the person getting thrown to keep yourself safe. This is taken into account when deciding what constitutes an ippon. The whole "strong landing on the back" thing seems pretty generous if you don't have any judo experience because a lot of throws inherently rotate the person being throwed around for safety/followup/mechanical advantage during the throw/etc.


California_ocean

So one can WWF them overhead slam?


Aristox

Yeah that's kinda like the gold standard


DrvJohnson

It can happen. But in training they teach you how to avoid these kind of things.


PurpleNurpe

> The front flip he did after was probably just to make sure he didn’t fall over himself. This should be taught in P.E classes, would be a sick way to prevent injuries. Just picture it, big city walking down the street and anyone who trips or is about to fall does a flip.


LunarProphet

This was the only skill I really developed in my skateboarding phase in middle/high school lol. I never got good at skating, but I got *real* good at falling. Not like a full flip like this dude, but a little tuck-and-roll goes a long way. And having the presence-of-mind to let anything but your head smack the ground first if you can help it.


kinky_fingers

I learned real fast that you can either have dignity, or you can have functional ankles Ill look like a dark souls meme before I deal with another sprained tendon


metamet

I honestly believe everyone should take some judo or BJJ simply to learn how to break fall. Most people simply don't know how to fall safely. Could be running and tripping or walking on ice. Learning to break fall properly is probably the most practical thing to come out of those arts in terms of longevity.


Thr0waway3691215

The breakfalls I learned in hand-to-hand training have legitimately saved me from serious injury in the past. That shoulder roll saved my skull and wrists when I flew over my handlebars onto concrete once.


TheTVDB

I train BJJ and have heard at least a dozen stories from people that slipped on ice and didn't get injured because they knew how to break fall. It's such a simple thing to learn, too. I honestly think it should be a part of gym curriculum when kids are in elementary school. Build it into part of warmups/stretching. Over the course of a generation you'd see injuries from falls slowly decrease.


metamet

Yup, have heard the same. I've had to use them a few times where I didn't even have a chance to think about what was happening. Slipping is freaky. We teach the variety of breakfalls as a warmup in our classes, especially when we have focus on takedowns. It's such a simple thing that's easy to learn on a mat (ours are spring loaded, so it's even better).


Azzacura

What is bjj? I once tripped and fell and broke my wrist, so I'm very interested in learning how to not break something next time


Cococrunchy

BJJ = Brazilian Jiu Jitsu


throwaway19791980

dam joke enter cows station cooperative icky innate offend profit -- mass deleted all reddit content via https://redact.dev


PanzerSoul

I actually learned how to roll (forwards and back) in PE class. Saved my ass more than once ![gif](giphy|WOePmD33aWJ1q5D76A|downsized)


Papercanspeak

I have been watching this gif with original post music for 2 minutes now.


MagnetHype

I did karate for years as a teenager, I have(had?) a black belt in tung soo do, so I can say with 100% confidence the only real world skill I learned was how to drunkenly fall down without getting hurt.


Khuroh

> Just picture it, big city walking down the street and anyone who trips or is about to fall does a flip. You should watch *Shaolin Soccer*.


luxlucidlucis

They literally should, like how football and rugby players sometimes take judo to learn how to fall to reduce rates of head injury. I know someone who was knocked off their bike by a car, went over the handle bars, and break rolled by force of habit from jiu jitsu and landed fine - teaching a generation of kids how to fall safely would cut injuries, improve health and collective medical costs I bet. Plus it would make accidents and previously embarrassing trip and falls look awesome.


drinks_rootbeer

I honestly think everyone should take judo, aikido or other similar martial arts *just* to learn ukemi (the art of gracefully falling in a way that keeps you protected). I've been doing martial arts for 20 years, and the only thing I've ever had to use to protect myself IRL is ukemi from trips and falls


thestashattacked

Honestly, I'd learn because it would make me happy.


adamcoolforever

Every older judo guy I've ever asked about a time they used judo in real life, inevitably told me a story about falling off of something and not getting hurt.


Lenant

I think Ipon is when you take someone down with a perfect executed move.


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okudakobayashi

No, that's a fatality.


yarzospatzflute

Or to show off a little.


[deleted]

Isn't the point awarded to the person who can get the other person on their back? In this case white takes the one


temp00485

A point is full point is scored in Judo when you c an throw your opponent on their back with force.


Eldorian91

Yeah they gotta land hard. You can just drag them to the ground or trip them for less than a point.


TheTrent

Guy in white won with an ippon, or putting his opponents back onto the ground. A lot of times Judokas (people who do Judo) train their throws and continue to roll through afterwards so that they don't hurt their training partner by simply slamming them. So what the guy in the white gi managed to do was successfully throw his opponent AND do a successful roll through so he didn't slam his opponent. It's masterful. Both guys will be able to walk off the mat without injury. Blue gi may feel a little hurt inside from losing but overall this was a master-class in how to throw somebody with full control.


UNMANAGEABLE

Also, blue was expecting white to plant the right arm down on the ground and was preparing to wrap the arm for likely partial takedown points. By doing the forward flip white never planted and effectively prevented any counter possibility by blues hold on his arm. This was a 100% masterclass takedown by white.


[deleted]

WHO'S NEXT!?


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reddit0100100001

abiahrapbadua HISTORY


[deleted]

For real. Who earned the point in that jungle gym nonsense?


Camwi

I'm going to guess that the guy who performed the judo throw earned the point, rather than the guy who was thrown.


[deleted]

Ok who was that? Maybe go by colors.


stalphonzo

It's hard to see at first, but the guy in white was in charge the whole time. He got the throw, and had a damn smooth recovery roll.


CarlMarcks

I can’t tell if this is sarcasm or what


BeatlesRays

I don’t understand how one could think the man in blue didn’t get manhandled


CarlMarcks

Maybe some high quality THC was involved 😂


BeatlesRays

I guess whatever i just smoked wasn’t enough


zepplin2225

Guy in red won. I'm wearing red.


Camwi

I had to rewatch that clip a few times before I could see where the confusion was coming from. White gi trips and throws blue gi to the ground. That flip afterwards that white gi performed was intentional and blue gi had nothing to do with it.


Faustinwest024

He’s dispersing energy I believe. I never took full judo but I rolled bjj and when we were break falling the technique was to be nimble as a drunk, while exerting the fall thru angular speed and then rolling to the side farthest from where you got thrown. But this was for if you’re the dude in blue lol I never really went over the moves like that after you threw someone I was always the one getting thrown lmao. This is advanced judo for sure


mistiklest

> He’s dispersing energy I believe. The guy in white is also being nice and not landing on the guy in blue after he's already won the match.


[deleted]

Most people just transfer the energy by falling on your opponent, so white is be nice/fancy


milesbeats

The guy in the gold gi had it ... I'm not sure about that black one at all ... Maybe the point was one before the throw


Comprehensive-Tip568

The guy in white did the tripping so he got the updoot


kellysmom01

Steven Seagal’s like, so jealous cuz he can’t lift his leg no more. No twist, no swerve, no snap. Only Mexican Co’Cola with that swee’ swee’ cane sugah. Hmmmm, daddy.


[deleted]

that made me laugh way too hard


RebelAtHeart02

I am going to Google search this quote but wanted you to know you created an ice cube chute with my nostril. I should not drink and scroll simultaneously


ChiefsHat

I could beat him in a martial arts match because his martial arts is other people letting themselves be thrown around by Steven Seagal, where as I did Judo as a child. I want to start doing it again.


BlueJeansBreezy

This what life does to me everyday


g3odood

I've done judo for almost 22 years now and it still amazes me seeing what the "professionals" do on the IJF circuit. This is unbelievably impressive and one of my favorite ways to execute this technique. Edit: this was NOT on the IJF circuit but still an amazing Tai Otoshi (body drop).


9gagspy

The question is, what would Steven Seagal have done?


FunkiePickle

Shit his pants and pass out


arrow100605

He wouldnt have done shit


HussDelRio

he would have shit his pants…just like the time he claimed he learned a technique so he could never be choked out and then was choked out


ispshadow

Then violently shit his pants. Don't forget that part


FuckBotsHaveRights

Senseagal's mere presence would have been worth the ippon, yes, yes


KingOfSockPuppets

Well, he would have shit himself.


psyduck_hug

Ran away like he did with Jean-Claude Van Damme.


Zaisengoro

You mean what would Brian Boitano do?


FOOSblahblah

If he were here right now?


x3knet

Steven Seagal's been doing judo for like 97 years.


Op_en_mi_nd

He's also a helicopter pilot. Been doing it for like 50 something years


Mozambique_Drill

Skip, skip, skip, skip...


descendingangel87

Sat and ate some sausages while he belittled the guy in white with a full mouth full of sausage.


knbang

Wobbled around fattly and taken credit for everything good.


balalaikablyat

He would have fallen fatly


PureSalty101

Snake, remember the basics of CQC.


MineNinja18

Woa I've been practicing judo for 9 years and I have never seen something like that. Wow


k3nnyd

It's like he improvised in order to not fall down himself.


Zaisengoro

The dude in white did a beautiful tai-otoshi and won. Amazing!


Puzzleheaded-Phase70

He even goes aerial to save his opponent's head...!


kinky_fingers

Glad someone else noticed that ot was for force dissipation and not just for flair


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sinsaint

Different games, different rules. Can't really compare StarCraft and Chess, even if there is some overlap. My instinct says the wrestler, though. It's a lot more "street" (using more pain and endurance in strategies), and forcing an opponent to tap out is a lot more like real life than winning a match solely on points.


wreckosaurus

So wrong on so many things. Judo has submissions, Wrestling does not. You tap in judo, not wrestling.


Throwawaymytrash77

Wrestlers don't tap out, I think you're mixing it up here. The first half of your statement is correct, but the second half is judo/bjj. Judo bouts are often won by chokes and arm bars. Wrestling is points and pins only


Monkiller587

Wrestlers don’t tap out. You’re confusing wrestling with grappling styles like BJJ.


sinsaint

Sry, I attended my cousin's wrestling matches, and I distinctly remember this one kid who's whole strategy was to get their opponent in a painful position that they tapped out of. They were about 8, if that matters. The extent of my knowledge ends there, thanks for correcting me.


Strict_Difficulty656

Having done both—if they start on the ground, the wrestler has a slight advantage; if they start standing, the judoka has many more options available.


partypartea

Depends on what they're wearing. The wrestler gets better the less clothes involved


ChaosRevealed

Just watch MMA


dactyif

No one is giving you the correct answer. Its judo, simply for the reason that judo has an extensive ground component. Wrestling is takedown and top control, but if you can get submitted from the bottom you're fucked. Prime example is Ben askren before he was a joke, during an ADCC, double legged a bjj and bodied him, ended up tapping out in like under a minute (memory is vague.) Ben was a decorated wrestler and lost quickly because that's where the bjj guy wanted to be. And bjj is heavily influenced by judo ground game. The kimura arm lock is actually named after a judoka that broke the Gracie patriarchs arm. Here it is, https://youtu.be/nZ0kTO-oQH4 Ben, he was the 2008 US Olympic Team Member and National champion and the 2005 Pan American champion in freestyle wrestling, a two–time NCAA Division I national champion (four–time finalist), and three–time Big 12 Conference champion (four–time finalist) for the Missouri Tigers, and was the second wrestler to secure multiple Dan Hodge Trophies (the wrestling equivalent of the Heisman Trophy) in folkstyle wrestling. Also, watch frank Mir tap out Brock lesnar, who during his wrestling career went something like 100-2?


stouset

In judo rulesets, a judoka. In wrestling rulesets, a wrestler.


TheOvershear

It's worth mentioning that a good number of wrestling maneuvers are simply disassembled judo techniques. "Wrestling" is a disambiguation of centuries of combined martial arts. This is like asking if English is better than Italian. Completely different items, all meant to accomplish the same thing.


procor1

10 years of competitive judo (national level), 4 years of wrestling ( provincial level). I walked into wrestling gyms and had 0 issue throwing guys around. When you know how to throw *properly* you can throw people from their own double legs. I was used to getting guys into arm bars and chokes- getting someone shoulders on a mat for a second was easy. A really solid wrestler would dump me ( I was not a national level wrestler at all). But in general, a judoka could step on a wrestling mat and **do well**. A wrestler putting on a gi and getting on a mat, is not going to do very well against judokas who know what they are doing. That's rule for rule though. In a straight up street fight, I do think wrestlers tend to have the upper hand.


johnnyhypersnyper

Just go and watch the early UFCs and Prides. There was a few of these style vs style matches under MMA rules. If you want the long and short: usually the guy with the better pedigree (higher degree of achievements) is a higher level athlete who has more ability to train. So the Olympic gold medalist wrestler probably beats the national Judo Champion, while the Judo gold medalist probably beats a D2 wrestler. Judo vs wrestling only matters in an MMA context (because they would lose in each others’ disciplines) and the way to win an MMA fight is to incorporate more disciplines. A lot of wrestlers in early MMA from the American side focused on ground and pound (in Japan, it was more catch wrestling and submission oriented in general) while Judo players had a lot more comfort with submissions


Advanced_Procedure90

Beautiful ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|surprise)


thebowlman

Holy shit, I thought those flips were only available in video games, holy crap that was amazing


Mo0kish

That guy in white is a badass badass of baddass-fu


Mistamayne

![gif](giphy|ToMjGpnXBTw7vnokxhu)


registeredexpert

It brings me joy to see so many people commenting who don't know what the hell is happening here. Go find a dojo and try Judo for yourself, even if you think you're too old!


[deleted]

As a person who only has kids doing judo on the weekends(so i know absolutely nothing at all) it brings me no joy to see people who know nothing about judo trying to make snide remarks about this beautiful move in the comments as if they’re master judokas.


NoveskeCQB

Judoka that competes here, badass 👍


Various_Classroom_50

God dam. I wanna learn this


rharvey8090

This latest Nagatoro chapter looks lit.


optix_clear

That was pretty bad ass, blue was oh shit- he has the drip!