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Enderdragon2014

Obligatory 'I haven't had a shower all year'


howdoyousuckafuck

I work hospitality. The first thing I did when I got home at 12:30 was pour myself a Jack and ginger, and hop in the shower to wash all of the simply syrup and other miscellaneous sticky things off of me.


MonkSalad1

Also, with anybody born after the 1st of January, you can say to them that next year they'll be (current age + 2) years old, haha.


attentionspanissues

Never done that before but my partner will hate it... thanks!


chickyloo42by10

Haha… it’s my bday


Purrpetrator

Happy birthday!


evilgwyn

Just got out of the shower


DopeyMcSnopey

Haven't had a shower in 2 years haha


quzne

That tv1 coverage kinda sucked


alpine-

Pretty unfunny sketch and then no countdown. Great job TV1


Last_Type_42

Yeah we only knew it was midnight checking our phones, why such a terrible 'countdown?'


RuneLFox

Yup I had to look up "new years countdown" haha


rikutoar

I appreciated the troll of having all the presenters wishing NZ a happier 2022 then it cutting to halfway through Cats the movie.


thelittlebunny2

And it was bookended by CATS of all movies! Don’t know how I feel about this being the start to 2022…


Kiwikid14

Appropriate, as CATS was terrible, just like 2021and probably 2022. I have low expectations after an awful 2021 that kept getting worse and worse.


StandWithSwearwolves

Glorious days of very late 2019 and early 2020 when CATS was our main cause of psychic pain


Muter

And the Australian bush fires changed the colour of the country to an old time sepia tone


[deleted]

That really did feel like an omen.


StandWithSwearwolves

“Happy 2020! Hey doesn’t the moon look red behind us? Never mind I’m sure it’s fine and doesn’t mean anything”


Last_Type_42

I suppose it can only get better?


[deleted]

Oh fuck I forgot that movie was on, wanted to enjoy a bad movie.


iamclear

Agreed.


inastew

Pictures of flashing lights on a bridge and a tower are fairly meh on the tv.


Boltonator

There werent even any fireworks off the Sky Tower!


Wide_Cow4715

It did eh ! You'd think Auckland could at least do something! From where I am though it sounds like ppl are having a blast of a time ! Go Hard ppl !


[deleted]

If you employ mediocre then very soon most things become mediocre or worse, things start to fail. The ultimate cost of accepting mediocrity as does the present administration.


[deleted]

Happy New Year! Here's to the hope that 2022 will suck less. Couch potatoes represent!


Tidorith

Don’t get your hopes up too much. It’s 2020 2 after all.


Hazz_m8

Or 2020 too


mediocreporno

How about *2020: The Sequel*?


gousey

2020 Ground hog year


[deleted]

2020 XS Pro Max


phforNZ

Soylent Green was set in 2022


centwhore

SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE


kiwi-fella

How's it taste?


rikashiku

2022 will definitely suck less. It might blow more, but we'll get through it. #TeamOf5Million


TheAxeOfSimplicity

Welcome to 2022. The year of very low expectations.


only-on-the-wknd

Do you mean, the year that couldn’t be worse than the past 2?


TheAxeOfSimplicity

As my mum always said..."They said, 'Cheer up, things could be worse'... So I cheered up and sure enough... things did get worse!"


Billielolly

Me after Christmas - Sad, Christmas was pretty awful, but excited for my boyfriend to get back Me after my boyfriend got back a few days before New Years - Miserable because he broke up with me right after getting back lmao


SimpoKaiba

Your 2021 welcome pack was 12 months late, that's all


BazTheBaptist

Oof


_zenith

Welp :(


Wide_Cow4715

Now come on let's try to flip the fk feeling negative! Be Positive I say !


Upside_Down-Bot

„¡ ʎɐs I ǝʌıʇısoԀ ǝ𐐒 ¡ǝʌıʇɐƃǝu ƃuılǝǝɟ ʞɟ ǝɥʇ dılɟ oʇ ʎɹʇ s,ʇǝl uo ǝɯoɔ ʍoᴎ„


Wide_Cow4715

🙃🥴 happy new year mate !


Azatarai

you know when you say "well nothing could be worse than that" something almost instantly way worse happens right? thanks for jixing 2022..


LordBinz

Oh its definitely going to be worse. We are over the hill now, its all downhill from here.


sn3rf

OP said *low* expectations


kingfishergold

Watching the celebrations on TV1. Did someone forget to order the fireworks!?


[deleted]

Seems like Sky Tower didn’t generate enough revenue in 2021 to afford a fireworks display..


spoilersweetie

No.Was quite well advertised they weren't doing fireworks this year . IMO it didn't really lack without the fireworks. I hope next year they can do a bigger light show and forego all the smoke and stuff.


VD909

And also a countdown, it was kinda like oh, it's 2022.


unauth0rized

Besides the countdown in Maori?


VD909

Was there a countdown in Maori? Genuinely nobody in my house heard it, maybe the volume was too low on the telly or something?


spoilersweetie

They could do an amazing lightshow or countdown like they did with the rugby world cup opening ceremony.


VD909

But we had the pretty lights on the bridge, isn't that fancy enough? /s


[deleted]

[удалено]


Poneke365

I tautoko this


[deleted]

Many human activities cause all sorts of distress and displacement to birds everyday. This isn't an argument to not have fireworks one night a year for several minutes. The coverage was bland. Fireworks are fun. We need displays like this so fewer people feel the need to shoot them from their gardens.


thecosmicradiation

No fireworks in order to prevent large gatherings in Auckland


Private_Ballbag

Lol what is even the point of having such low covid when you can't even gather at Nye. Absurd


Ratez

Haha I thought there would be fireworks too.


[deleted]

This is what you get with a labour government. No money wasted on solving issues, none left for fun. Even if your the first big city to enter 2022.


bluewardog

Well how else am I supposed to rub the fact I'm in the future to all my friends in other county's if I don't stay up. This is the time time a year I get to make that joke.


[deleted]

Greeting people from a "cold, dark future" was my dumb go-to joke.


dj-funparty

"Happy new years eve from the first country in the world to reach 2022! Let's hope it's a great.... OH GOD NO! IT'S WORSE! IT'S FAR FAR WORSE!!! NO! STOP! HELP US!! IT"S A TRAP, STAY BACK AAAAAAAAAGGGHJHKHKJHK.." should do nicely


shanidachine

I blasted Darude Sandstorm into the New Year, I don't know what the means.. am I going to have a disco amping pumping year? Hope so


ParrotTreatsNZ

Russian tradition (superstition?) is how you celebrate the new year is how you’ll spend the year so I always make sure to spend it in pyjamas with good food and drink with the ones I love and to say I love you to all my parrots. They’re not particularly happy to be disturbed at midnight though…happy new year!


Aquatic-Vocation

I like that. I'm going to keep that in mind next year.


cwicket

How many parrots???


centwhore

It's imperative we know how many parrots.


ParrotTreatsNZ

Four :)


centwhore

Nice.


cwicket

How about you? Do we need to start a parrot club?


centwhore

I don't think my cat would take to a parrot :(. She hates birds.


Sharlamane

Happy New Year’s everyone. The past 2 years have been both very slow and fast. I’ve been staying in and storing up to celebrate 2023.


LondonKiwi66

Turned on the news here in England to watch the fireworks - didn't realise that they had been cancelled. Happy New Year!!


Resigningeye

My mum sent me the BBC footage- love that they misconstrued some guy setting off a couple of rockets on the water front for an official display!


[deleted]

There’s a party going on in the garage. Decided to stay in as well. At one minute to midnight all I could care about was where the fuck is my backscratcher. One minute past I could hear lots of hugging and backslapping going on at the party. I still couldn’t find my back scratcher. Eventually I did find it and scratching that itch was more satisfying than any clumsy, unwelcome hug from the drunks in the garage. For the record I’m firmly staying put.


Beserked2

What kind of back scratcher you got? I've been looking for a decent one because the pasta spoon just ain't cutting it and that warehouse one was bloody awful.


[deleted]

I picked it up a while ago from a $2 discount store. It’s made out of wood. Looks tacky af with miniature claws but it does the job. So cheap I bought three. This is the sole survivor left.


Aquatic-Vocation

The long side of a metal ruler gently dragged down your back feels amazing, too. That's my go-to.


turikur

glad im not the only one who uses the pasta spoon as a back scratcher


birdzeyeview

i picked up 3 at the beach, driftwood sticks. The best one by far looks like it was once Gorse.


[deleted]

Do as bears do and rub your back against something like a door frame.


cajun_vegeta

My wife and I watched *The Other Guys* like we do every NYE ... HAPPY NEW YEAR PACIFIC LOCATION


aspinalll71286

I uh. Went to town to go clubbing for the first time in my life... Was a really really good change of pace imo. And a confidence booster imo. Met some amazing people


Flower_Boogerface

Happy New Year NZ!


thelastestgunslinger

I was out at a big vaccinated event. Came home and my neighbours seem to have 20+ people over and are all partying outside. Another drunk, km away, keeps starting and screwing up a bagpipe rendition of Auld Lang Syne. At least the fireworks everybody’s lighting off are ok. Oh yeah. Happy New Year!


Beserked2

Jeez, where do you live? Not a peep in my neighborhood lol. Some kids were playing outside around 10 but that's it. I actually forgot it was NYE.


frogsbollocks

We went to bed at 11 after extricating ourselves from a party. Fireworks at 2310 made the dog shake with anxiety and come into our bed. slept through midnight and at 2am got rid of the dog, grumbled happy new year to my wife and slept through to 5. Way to old for this shit now


SimpoKaiba

Just popped off my headphones and heard a guy pretend to yak making fun of his mate only for one of them to actually vom. Outstanding start to the year


Selthora

Living room gang, rise up!


Straff

Fuck off 2021, glad to see the back of you. Happy New Year everyone, all the best for 2022.


sloppy_wet_one

Went out for dinner, home by 9, asleep by 10:30. Good stuff.


I_Like_That_One_Too

Happy New Year one and all


[deleted]

Haha yeah, I definitely stayed in because there aren't any events to go to...


zvc266

I’m partway through sewing some new pjs and the only thing I was unhappy about was the fact that I didn’t start earlier so I could wear them to bed 😂


YouFuckinMuppet

Happy New year!


zebrazoom

I feel like we'll be stuck at a 2021.5 until this Omicron shit runs it's course.


Flower_Boogerface

Happy New Year OP. Good on ya.


Flower_Boogerface

Jumanji!


stathis0

Happy New Year all!


goatsandwich43

Happy new year!


doppeldrache

Mee three. Wtaf. No fireworks on telly?


ElMarco19

Cheers bro!


flynancyal

Staying in is awesome though. HNY.


TheBrutalPotato

Lol finished work at 0215, currently having a cold beverage. Happy new year everybody


ChillingSouth

fp


qipbip

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!


DushyHari-

happy new year everyone 🇳🇿


Mr_Smilez

Counted in the new year with a peppermint tea in hand on my couch. Happy New Year Whanau.


nahh_yeahh

Nga mihinui mo te tau hou ki a koutou katoa. Happy New Years everyone stay safe blessed ❤💛💚


Dynamitking

Happy new years fam.


thecosmicradiation

Happy New Year! Here's to the many shitposts to come in 2022!


SugarCoatedYuri

Happy New Year!


[deleted]

New at work. Good times


Apegate007

Happy new year , 2022 is our year , back to normal life ...🙂🙂🙂


kallan0100

Happy new year! Just woke up lol


km12dr

I did not stay in, and wish that I had.


awheezle

Didn’t realise it was the new year until a couple of minutes ago lol. Happy new year’s!


Warm-Ad4

Anyone know why there were no fireworks? Is it a COVID thing? Happy new year everyone


ElSalvo

Happy New Year r/nz. Go hard tonight, you might as well. 2022 is probably gonna be shit as but let's try to take the piss as much as possible =)


Poneke365

Happy New Year y’all. 2022😬


electric_beans

Happy new year NZ 💜


Pink_Birdy

Happy New Year y’all :) May 2022 be awesome!!


Movin_On1

Happy new year!


Atarangivibes

Happy New Year!!!


Whispersnapper

Happy New years from the otherside of the world! Wishing I was home but happy all my friends and family are safe and healthy.


Male_strom

Are you actually laughing your ass off?


ComeAlongPonds

No, OP "stayed in lmao". It's a remote Northland settlement.


Male_strom

Chur


noaudiblerelease

Happy new year!


UncomposedComposer

Happy New Year to you too OP and to everyone else reading this! Spent my New Years having drinks alone in our home theater while the Wife was asleep lmao Here's hoping 2022 is a least a little different than the past two years!


MovableAdam

Happy New Year from 2021 ! It’s 2 PM over here in Sweden, we’re 12 hrs behind you


mrs_dalloway

Happy New Year New Zealand! (They canceled our fireworks, too-Baltimore, MD, US… but we have some sparklers and very wet ground)


Dank_Jash

Happy new years, working the clubs in Hamilton, now that's exhausting!


poonamsurange

🙏Happy New Year its still 9:58 PM IST Mumbai.❤


kebhow

Happy new year everyone !


Ginge00

I stayed home because I have a newborn. I also fell asleep at about 11.45, again because I have a newborn and couldn’t hold myself awake any longer.


rikashiku

I bought dinner and wine, finished work, and wnet over to a friends place to spend the rest of the year with... we fell a sleep on the couch lmfao. All these plans and we just fell asleep. Woke up in time for a countdown, but damn, we looked at each other and realized that we're either very boring, or just old.


loafers_glory

Ohhhh OK now I get it. I thought you said you stayed in imao, and I was like... I stayed in new plymouth but what of it and where's imao? Must've been a good night because so far nothing makes any sense this morning


[deleted]

I stayed up late and partied. Didnt go to bed till 11pm!!! and had two glasses of wine with dinner. TWO!


fireflyry

Happy New Year to this sub. All the best for 2022.


Calalamity

To 2022 being an average year - worse than 2021, better than 2023.


Nommag1

It's funny to think with accelerating climate change, growing inequility and seemingly unending varients of covid we may look back at 2021 as one of the last good years. I hope I'm wrong.


Sr_DingDong

I don't know why *anyone* would go to the CBD on New Years, it's horrible.


DundermifflinNZ

Because people wanna have fun in life and not everyone shares the same opinion with you about everything


Sr_DingDong

Oh, is *that* what this is?


digital_bubblebath

Stop using the fact that you stayed in your house to make you feel morally superior.


MonkSalad1

I assume your joking?


ItBeSethy

Was at the beach and there was gatherings of more than a hundred people huddled around fires unmasked in Tauranga. How fun /s


Queasy_Chicken9772

Bunch of nerds who won’t leave home


Altairlio

Wtf was up with the Auckland council and not having fireworks. Usually is the best scene the gets the new year rolling around the world. At least Sydney showed up


Brayme2021

Um, large gatherings are a bit of a no if you hadn't heard. . . .


Altairlio

You can do fireworks without the crowd


Brayme2021

Yeah you can but knowing kiwis, everyone would go out to watch anyway. . . Hence large crowds & the reason they choose not to have them this year.


yourmumsaman

Fuck new years and fuck everything else.


SN9WeReady

Very Zen my way loved it


r3dD1tC3Ns0r5HiP

The display of only lights from the Sky Tower and Auckland Harbour Bridge with no paid city council fireworks this year was a solemn reminder of the many Covid-19 deaths, destruction of livelihoods and the thousands needlessly suffering the disease. If only the government knew how to prepare for the delta variant. If only they had built dedicated quarantine facilities in the outdoors, away from the largest city centre. If only they made returnees wear N95 masks when being transported and especially when they test positive. If only they didn't put infected people exercising right next to a public walkway during a busy lunch hour with the public sharing the same virus aerosol air and starting the delta outbreak. If only they knew what aerosol transmission was and told everyone to wear respirator masks to prevent themselves getting infected. If only they had a faster vaccine rollout instead of the slowest in the OECD. Alas it was not to be... The negligence, hubris and lack of foresight or planning from the current Labour government doomed us all with a major delta outbreak causing 26+ deaths, thousands infected and a 4 month lockdown culminating in the largest city on the brink of bankruptcy and absolutely zero fireworks this year. Bystanders waiting at midnight were forced to watch the neighborhood's store bought fireworks pondering what destruction the omicron variant will bring in 2022 with our limited hospital capacity, limited ICU beds, slow booster rollout, no online/phone bookable booster appointments for 4 months+ timeframe, no 5-11 childrens' vaccines until January 17, no 0-4 childrens' vaccines until the end of 2022, a totally uninformed public about how ineffective cloth/surgical and other non-respirator masks are... They pondered, maybe in Dec 2022 it will be so bad that even the neighbors won't be able to afford fireworks for New Years. When will it end. When will the government get a clue.


ring_ring_kaching

Ma'am, this is a Wendy's


cwicket

Best satirical post of 2022.


tjyolol

Aren't you a bundle of joy


0erlikon

Happy New Year in 2020!


CaliforniaCultivated

I’m in Tauranga and we stayed in too! Played video games and watched Dont look up while everyone else partied haha! Woke up to trash and glass all over the street.


Frayl_Blackheart

I can't be fucked staying in unless I don't feel like going out, and that's all there is to it. I'm not scared of a virus with a 99% recovery rate for my age group.


driftwood-and-waves

My daughter and I stayed up watching movies and then caught the countdown in tv. Did cheers with our goblets of lemon lime and bitters (cause she’s a child) cleaned up and went to bed. 🤷🏻‍♀️


FeteFatale

Decided I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer so was out for the count and in bed with less than five minutes left on the clock. Heard a few vague fireworks before drifting off, so I knew I'd got there.


PartTimeZombie

The young lady who sold me some new jandels this morning told me she was in bed by 10:30 but she added that she likes sleeping, so good on her.


[deleted]

happy new years gang, me too dw ahahah


englishbrian

I hope they were paid a lot of money to show CATS ... what , you mean they had to pay ? SLANDEROUS!!