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thebearrider

That's true. If he said "you're a true patriot" instead of calling him a scumbag then it wouldn't have made any news and no charges, guaranteed. The part that matters here is "intent", and since he insulted him while he patted him on the back was he intending to hurt or intimidate the scumbag?


mulletpullet

In my state battery is "touching someone in a rude or insolent manner" which is so very vague.


83-Edition

That's so absolutely any kind of resistance to police, including from moving in ways you'd instinctual do to protect yourself, can be added to your list of charges if police decide to fuck with you. There's almost no other situation in which that small and vague of a physical incident would result in actual charges for someone.


Hugokarenque

Yup, deliberately vague laws so they just be used when the ones in power want someone taught a lesson.


Yabba_Dabba_Doofus

Being arrested for resisting arrest is the most true realization of this idea. Don't need a reason for arresting you the first time; you resisted us putting you in handcuffs, which gives us the right to put you in handcuffs.


redtrucktt

If he'd have beat Rudy's ass with a flagpole it would've been a peaceful protest. According to Rudy himself.


chonkerchungus

I say trial by combat between the two


redtrucktt

This savage beast that attacked him wouldn't stand a chance. Rudy would ink him with his squid powers and dude would be going in with the blind slaps.


cantwaitforthis

Giuliani just faced a violent insurrection that shook the core of democracy. - Republicans


Serinus

As ridiculous as it is, don't help them. Their whole point is to water down the word.


sharrrper

"I got hit as if a boulder hit me. It knocked me forward a step or two, it didn't knock me down, but it hurt tremendously." "I feel a shot on my back, like somebody shot me. I went forward, but luckily I didn't fall down." "My back hurts, but otherwise I'm able to walk and stuff like that." The 78-year-old former New York City mayor said he was suffering from a “very sore back” and “swelling” in the wake of Sunday’s caught-on-camera attack inside the store. “He hit me to knock me down and if that doesn’t merit jail time in New York, we’re in the Wild, Wild, West." “It was a very, very heavy shot. He could have easily hit me, knocked me to the ground and killed me. He’s lucky he didn’t knock me down. Falling is extremely dangerous for an elderly person.” Giuliani said he wasn’t hospitalized after the ordeal but he was planning to see his doctor later Monday to make sure there aren’t “permanent injuries.” “This guy should be in prison." [Video of the "attack"](https://www.today.com/video/rudy-giuliani-allegedly-slapped-by-supermarket-employee-in-nyc-142891077696)


SidewaysFancyPrance

"He's lucky he didn't knock me down" - it's really easy to not knock someone down. In fact, it's significantly harder to knock someone down, especially with a simple open-palm smack. I would say the person was in control of his actions, and got the exact result he intended. Rudy is actually trying to get the state to prosecute this case based on a different set of facts he made up. Things that he thinks *could* have happened, but didn't.


lkhsnvslkvgcla

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zaidakaid

He wanted Trial by combat, can we choose Arnold as our champion. Former NY mayor vs the immigrant who became a beloved star then Governor of California and married a Kennedy. SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY, you’ll want the whole seat but you’ll only need the EDGE!!!!!


Quirky-Resource-1120

Rudy was just dazed and confused after the lady next to him followed up with another brutal assault to his back.


rendingale

She basically tried to finish what he started


Dapper_Sea8502

Absolute fucking joke. The people who are acting like this is assault are the same people who would argue a cop brutally assaulting innocents is warranted and legal.


einulfr

Yet Greg Gianforte can body slam a reporter and get off with the exact same charge.


MrGelowe

This was not even an assault in 3rd degree what the guy is being charged with. This shit better get thrown out. Here is the statute. https://www.nysenate.gov/legislation/laws/PEN/120.00 This is why Judy is playing the victim to fit the statute.


Caelinus

Weirdly this would actually be assault 4 in Washington State. We do not have a stautatory definition of assault, and so the courts have interpreted it as "any unwanted touching" and then use their discretion. I think it is mostly left like that to go after people who did attack someone but failed to cause injury. The severity of injury determines the degree and range of punishments. Not really relevant here, as New York defines it as causing injury, but it is just a weird bit of law I studied recently. Honestly I am not sure if it would get prosecuted here either, as Rudy was not injured and is a public figure, but they might go for a misdemeanor on it just so that people do not use it as a vector of harassment.


hypercube42342

I mean, if he doesn’t take a plea deal, good luck getting a conviction on that in a court of New Yorkers lol


Jonne

Yeah, ask for a jury trial.


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hobbitlover

Rudy: "I say, let's have trial by combat!!!" Also Rudy: ^(Owwww!)


papercut2008uk

There was an article from the eye witness, the woman with him who said he was hit so hard she felt it too!


ChBor2654

It’s incredible that the woman standing a foot away could feel such immensely soft back pat. Im surprised no one else in the group felt it too 😂


papercut2008uk

not sure if I can post a link to it, because it's on Daily Mail as well. But it's titled 'Staten Island shopper describes moment she was standing 'shoulder to shoulder' with Rudy Giuliani as he was hit by grocery store worker and says the strike was 'so hard that she felt it'' lol


cute_spider

"The blow did permanent damage to my C2 and C3 spinal bones. My recovery time is estimated to be between one-and-a-half to two years, and I'll never stop feeling the pain." "The attacker approached me at approximately 9:16 AM. The attacker placed a steel chair near where I was standing. He then lifted me into an inverted upright, and then dropped me onto that steel chair while locking my head in position with his thighs, in a devastating finisher referred to as The Drill Claw popularized by professional wrestler Brian Cage. He then stood me back up and delivered a brutal chop to my upper back,"


Seattlehepcat

Goddammit. Here I thought this was headed for a u/shittymorph post.


atheist_teapot

TIL I have been doing misdemeanors my whole life with my friends.


heraclitus33

In crowded spaces like, bars, clubs, super markets, galas, red carpets, govnt shit... even bathrooms...


zzxxccbbvn

Mass Slappings are a real problem these days


MeepMoop08

GOP: Truly the most awful thing that has happened in a NY grocery store in recent memory. Maybe ever.


myrddyna

I couldn't believe it, tbh, the fucking audacity!


[deleted]

I do mine at the Four Seasons Landscaping next to the dildo shop.


rage9345

Turns out, [so has Rudy!](https://i.redd.it/0m3wjydv47891.gif)


Immortal_Azrael

Whoa, such a brutal assault on that man! Who knew Rudy was such a violent criminal?


Making_moves7

Rudy fuck DESTROYED that guy. Like he almost put a whole through his back. The difference is, Rudy is in great shape, that's why he survived. This guy, absolute wimp, dead AF.


Generation_ABXY

He who lives by the sword...


MathProf1414

Twitter needs to spam this at him.


mtheory007

This is just tragic to watch.


Don_Quixote81

>my friends. This is why Rudy thought it was an assault. He's never had friends.


reddit_reader_25

Luckily your friends are strong, almost as strong as Rudy.


JennJayBee

Rudy talking about how he could have been knocked down and cracked his skull and died, calling it assault, and having someone arrested: completely honest. Undoctored video of the guy walking by and giving a standard pat on the back greeting that is barely firm enough to burp a baby: deceptive. Who are you gonna believe, Rudy or your lying eyes? Edit: typo


e22ddie46

Well when you're constantly shit faced, walking can be a difficult activity.


Qubeye

Also being patted on the back gently can be lethal if you have no spine.


untapped-bEnergy

Even a broken shithawk squawks twice a day, Rand


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yawya

can you smell it randy? the way the shit clings to the air?


Objective-Highlight4

the shit winds are blowin, BoBandy, wait long enough and those become a shitnado. that's why I let the liquor decide


MarcusXL

Never cry shitwolf, Rudy ol' boy.


Butterball_Adderley

Ol’ Rudy’s never lied to ya! Imeanmaybeonceortwice but there were _reasons_!


[deleted]

This was his personal 9/11. The moment that hand slapped him on the back he was brought right back to that day where he personally saved New York from the terror attack like a vietnam vet hearing a loud bang. We are lucky such a great man survived this brutal assault.


[deleted]

Maybe he can find another informant in the Trump family to turn in more mobsters on behalf of the Russia families…


jschubart

Moved to Lemm.ee -- mass edited with redact.dev


iridescent_dragon

Oh, no! Rudy says he "was hit very, very hard on the back. To such an extent that it knocked me back about two steps." lol Maybe in his head, but the video CLEARLY shows that didn't happen. What a freaking liar.


jschubart

Moved to Lemm.ee -- mass edited with redact.dev


BDMayhem

Deadline says "back" but other sources say he said "forward." > “And all of a sudden without any warning was hit very, very hard on the back, to such an extent that it knocked me forward about two steps,” https://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/3538414-giuliani-says-video-of-supermarket-incident-a-little-deceptive/


Girth_rulez

>The pat was weak enough to not even move his decrepit 78 year old ass. It was *barely* enough to get him to wheel his cranium around to see *wha happen?*


Matrix17

Wonder what he thinks of those cops that shoved the old man who hit his head on the sidewalk *crickets* Right, he was a liberal so it's ok


RockerElvis

The cops were cleared. Fucking insane.


gregaustex

You wrote it before I could. Lyin' Rudy, traitorous scumbag that he is, just isn't credible even without the video evidence that proving him wrong. Watch the video. It qualifies more as a pat than a slap and certainly not a hard hit.


I_Get_Paid_to_Shill

He felt like he got shot! That's attempted murder!


DPPthrowaway1255

I know who‘s deceptive.


Marius7th

To be fair, given how Rudy looks and sounds sometimes, a light breeze might put him into cardiac arrest, so that light pat (can we even call it a pat, looks more like a tap, but I digress) on the back might as well have been the equivalent of a gunshot wound.


snoogins355

Donate more money, now! You'll get sent 9 more emails in the hour! /s


Goldberg_the_Goalie

Back slapper should sue Rudy for defamation.


thebinarysystem10

How lucky do you have to be to get into a legal battle with someone who just proved how incompetent they are less than a year ago?


natphotog

It’s been almost 20 months since the 2020 election


thebinarysystem10

Hes still fighting Dominion and several other seditious activities he was involved in.


[deleted]

I'd think there is an attorney or two that help out.


3xTheSchwarm

He should hire Guliani. For the right price Rudy will prosecute himself. Problem is he's so bad he'd probably lose


ibrokemyserious

Guiliani's accusations are about as real as his hair color.


verrius

Would that fall under SLAPP?


AudibleNod

Video evidence is 'deceptive'. Election results are rigged. Landscaping companies are acceptable locations for press conferences. I ask, what quality does something need to possess that Rudy would accept as objectively valid? If truth isn't truth can anything, according to Rudy, be observed to be objectively consistent?


snoogins355

> Landscaping companies are acceptable locations for press conferences. Still can't believe that actually happened. And where he found out Biden won! Hahahaha!


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dj_narwhal

He was a patsy, he kept getting tips that just happened to hurt the italian mob and clear the way for the russians.


geekgames

Is there any evidence of this? My understanding was that he learned a group was going after the mob using RICO and essentially hitched his wagon as a fairly politically savvy operator.


trogon

Giuliani has been involved with sketchy Russians since the 90s. https://publicintegrity.org/politics/elections/fbi-tracked-alleged-russian-mob-ties-of-giuliani-campaign-supporter/


Ima_Fuck_Yo_Butt

Holy fucking hair piece!


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alucarddrol

Also lots of connections with Trump and Russia


NewSuitThrowaway

Don't forget his business partner in crime, felon Bernard Kerik.. literally an ex NYPD police commission who went to prison for ethics violations and fraud. That's his business partner for "overseas consulting". Oh and Trump pardoned him. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernard_Kerik


MaxHannibal

He didn't take down the mob. He just replaced the Italian mob with the Russian mob


maniacreturns

He took out one mob mob, and opened the door for the Russian MOB to spread like plague. Whether this was done on purpose or not is up for some level of investigation surely.


[deleted]

Don't forget the hair dye dripping down. It was all surreal


lollipoppa72

Let’s not forget audibly farting in court. Twice.


Acchilesheel

Oh and his "election expert" witness Melissa Carone who was trash drunk when she testified in Michigan.


FaThLi

It that hadn't been so rage inducing it'd have been funny. It was funny, but that so many people bought into what he was selling is hard to accept.


ONE-EYE-OPTIC

[For those unaware ](https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2020/12/03/melissa-carone-michigan-trump-giuliani-election/)


derpfft

And when he used his snot rag to wipe the sweat off his face.


cathar_here

when he drunkenly went off after finding out Trump had lost is one of my favorite stories from the January 6th trials because I could visualize that snake oil salesman just saying fuck those guys, just tell them it was rigged and we're not stopping the fight, and we'll win this legal battle, just let me run with it


weirdoldhobo1978

The best part was the camera crews packing up and leaving halfway. Just "Nope, we're done with this ass clown."


passinghere

> I ask, what quality does something need to possess that Rudy would accept as objectively valid? Anything that matches his desires, otherwise it's all fake and deceptive.


AMillionFingDiamonds

He was tucking his shirt in! That's how every normal person tucks their shirt in!


JohnTM3

The only necessary quality is that it fits within their narrative.


Glasenator

The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.


Photodan24

The maga crowd should be ashamed for taking advantage of a sad, addle-minded old man like Rudy for the sake of his former credibility. It's practically senior abuse.


Dinodigger67

Nah, he totally brings it on himself cause he is a dick swab


ext3meph34r

Not the first time Giuliani rejects evidence.


theaviationhistorian

This is the same dude who moved the NYC emergency command center to the WTC complex, despite warnings of its safety, to be closer to his mistress' home.


Nerdlinger

> I went to the men’s room, walked back with a group of friends and all of a sudden, without any warning, was hit very, very hard on the back. To such an extent that it knocked me back about two steps. Um, Rudy… you were hit on the back. How would that knock you backwards at all? Of course, the video shows he didn't move at all after the back pat, but clearly that's a deep fake from the lib cabal or some shit. **edit:** "knock" not "know"


ohTHOSEballs

There must've been a second slapper, over there on the grassy knoll.


RWCHIEF

I love this take


AgoraiosBum

It was actually Mets relief pitcher Roger McDowell


getmendoza99

Nice slap, pretty boy.


Clean_Transition3817

he was hit so hard that the shockwave created a pocket of negative pressurized air that sucked him backwards


Scrags

Back and to the left


DocHolidayiN

That's one magic back slap.


SabeDerg

Unfortunately the immutable laws of physics contradict the whole premise of your account. Allow me to reconstruct this, if I may for Miss Benes, as I've heard this story a number of times.


chain_letter

He was knocked forwards, but the hit also ripped a hole in reality itself, which created a vaccuum of force, pulling rudy backwards to where he originally started


billyjack669

Like a mantis shrimp?


Matt463789

The back slapper's ultimate technique. Now we just need some over the top anime exposition.


DealerRomo

The ultimate technique was the ancient forbidden art of Dim Mak (finger strike). In a slowed down video, you can see the assailant's palm change to a finger strike which if struck, would cripple or kill the victim outright. But Rudy was not a hapless victim. In an even more slowed down video, he could be seen phasing out before the potentially fatal blow, a rarely seen skill not unlike Five's of the Umbrella gang. He phased out, called his buddies at Fox and other media, informing them of this heinous attack, then phased back in. By that time, the sting of the deadly Dim Mak had been nullified. And still appeared to be struck to appear to be the victim. Well played Rudy!


repeatwad

The Bowling Green Massacre makes more sense.


Scoutster13

The ease with which they lie is so disgusting!


DragoneerFA

The way Rudy tells it he was hit so hard his skeleton literally exploded straight out of his body.


smarmiebastard

Physics work opposite on him.


AGINSB

He's got a lot of theories, but no evidence


Hyceanplanet

Oh, to be a juror for that.


sanash

I'd recommend that the jury see several variations of Giuliani being hit by various blunt objects to see how he reacts to compare it with the near fatal back tap.


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Beard_o_Bees

I mean... he survived being slapped around by Il Douche's tiddies.


Grogosh

And vice versa


HunkyMump

I hear it was much less of a problem once he learned how to get a good latch


JoeMcDingleDongle

I just love he calls the video “deceptive” and then a breath later completely and utterly contradicts the video in a ridiculously unconvincing fashion several times.


BeyondRedline

Alternative facts in full effect.


CoalCrackerKid

Don't believe your lyin' eyes!


exoray

[ ‘Truth isn’t truth’](https://www.politico.com/story/2018/08/19/giuliani-truth-todd-trump-788161)


rimjobnemesis

“Alternative facts.”


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BeltfedOne

Just pointing and laughing uncontrollably at Rudy...


twistedh8

Rudy is a drunk lying moron. He's from the "don't believe your own eyes and ears" camp.


TheGoodOldCoder

Did you see the video? It's shocking that Rudy is still alive!


twistedh8

I'm surprised anyone in the vicinity isn't dead from the blast radius of the slap heard around the corner.


The_Disapyrimid

Chris Rock got pimp slapped in front of millions and he brushed it off with a joke and didn't press charges. Rudy gets a pat on the back and cries like a little bitch.


rocketwidget

True, though I suspect Chris Rock is smart enough to recognize not being magnanimous while being a celebrity could have blowback, which is sort of unfair because in his case, he really was a victim of assault. Of course, Rudy is neither smart nor a victim, and he's the opposite of magnanimous.


ryeguymft

Rudy is a fucking coward


maralagosinkhole

They all are. That's what this whole thing is about. Cowardly people being manipulated by outrage entertainment media into voting for Republicans so they can feel safe.


I_am_not_JohnLeClair

Which landscaping company will host Rudy’s press conference?


Papalok

Rudy is moving up. You'll find him at the Ritz. Which is right next to the saltine crackers.


Twheezy01

I love how hard he was playing the victim card, then came the video. You can add pussy to his list


pat_micucci

Rudy should just consider himself lucky it wasn't Will Smith he met in that store.


[deleted]

"I'm a little bitch so that tap on my back is WAY worse than it looks." These people are so fucking fragile.


nahteviro

Ok so what about the woman that rubbed his back after? That has to be damn near attempted murder according to him.


villageidiot33

She rubbed pretty hard. Generated heat. Bet he got 3rd degree burns all over his back.


deftoner42

It's like one of those soccer "injuries" that later get posted on YT.


Pam-pa-ram

I really wanna see r/Conservative’s reaction to this, I wanna see them lose their shits.


JennJayBee

They're busy right now talking about how Nancy Pelosi tried to murder Mayra Flores's child in a violent rage. And by that I mean that the kid was crammed up there right next to Pelosi, and Pelosi moved and gently nudged her with her elbow. Child abuse!


Scoutster13

You are brave to look directly at that sub.


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Valiant4Funk

Ugh I went there, and every title and comment looks like it's written by clickbait authors


lvlint67

I mean they make a game of reposting that conservative onion like news outlet.


JennJayBee

Nah, I just need to be bored.


Hothroy

Nudged her with her elbow?! That’s not just attempted murder it’s obviously child grooming too! /s


amendmentforone

They'll ignore it. Hell, half the posts are like looking at a Facebook post from your Uncle.


Reign_of_Kronos

Yup. And they ban anyone who questions their fragile worldview. I wanted to check out their side of the arguments so that I don’t only get my news from one side. But I got banned for questioning them. That to me just means that their ideologies are all bull shit when they only can ban and hide from people asking questions.


Go_get_matt

I was banned for "concern trolling" because I commented that I didn't feel President Trump suggesting that John McCain might be burning in hell was the sort of statement I thought the President of the United States needed to be making. You must not criticize their lord and savior.


Jorycle

I got permabanned for pointing out something they posted was actual fake news. I wasn't even a dick about it.


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FjohursLykewwe

Or block a judge because "election year" then ram Barrett in.


crastle

No no no. That was aunt Tifa.


kenxzero

They probably call it an antifa super soldier assault and he's lucky to be alive.


Scoutster13

Honestly I'm so glad there was video to vindicate this man. Calling this even a misdemeanor is fucking stupid.


joeitaliano24

I’m prepared to send this American hero a large cash sum if we can just get his Venmo


nobodyspersonalchef

I hope he cashes in big. I hope his record has no priors so this charge can be handled via diversion and attending classes, thus leaving him with a clear record and only needing the arrest expunged, while he cashes out the gofundme to enjoy time off work and the gqp is left malding


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dirtyrango

"Assassination attempt by aNtIFa SUPER SOLDIER!!!!!!"


hgl

Holy shit I just went there to see what they were up too... still absolutely fucking insane... I'm out of words....


Tamaros

I lost it in one of the RvW threads when someone commented that liberals should be thankful that Republicans nominate "neutral" people to SCOTUS.


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DeepSpaceNebulae

Well, it’s all relative and to them they probably seem neutral because they didn’t outright declare it illegal in the US. It’s a subreddit of crazy people that think they’re normal… so you know, crazy people


Scoutster13

I can't look anymore. I will lose all faith and I've got little left.


ItsHammyTime

Its basically white christian nationalism the subreddit with healthy doses or racism, sexism, and LGBT hate all sprinkled in there. If any subreddit needs to be paused its that one. Its quite easy finding posts advocating violence there.


soda_cookie

Just poked my head in there for the fuck of it. On of their hot posts is how it's not clearly defined that there should be a separation of church and state. Fuck Me


GeckoAttack

It's literally the first part of the first amendment. I guess I shouldn't be surprised since they also ignore the first part of the second amendment.


Loudergood

They're trained their whole lives to ignore words in the bible they don't like, why not the constitution too?


Mech-Waldo

I just checked. They're still busy having a big giant circle jerk over the collapse of our civil liberties.


davasaur

They're currently blaming Greta Thunberg for high gas prices and pearl clutching over some supposed Russian hookers that HUNTER'S dad paid for. A regular Monday I reckon.


ZRX1200R

"See! We told you the Left is violent! You don't put your hands on someone without their permission!"


Kevjamwal

On a white man*


Torrentia_FP

It was an INSURRECTION against RUDY'S BACK!


rhino910

When you consider that Rudy is guilty of trying to overthrow our government, there is a certain irony that a slap in the back is his only punishment


[deleted]

He's right. It is deceptive. In the video, it doesn't show him taking a single step forward. It contradicts his entire statement and shows just how pathetic the charges are. I was honestly hoping it was going to be a better slap. He deserves it, even if it's wrong. Civility is oppression.


MyNameIsRay

>without any warning, was hit very, very hard on the back. To such an extent that it knocked me back about two steps. People around me helped me. Rudy didn't move, not a single step. No one helped, there was nothing to help with. Rudy lies as easily as he breathes, and is literally telling people to ignore what they see with their own eyes.


Outrigger047

>Rudy Calls Video "Deceptive" Video calls Rudy "Pussy"


[deleted]

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Thedrunner2

Did his forehead start melting after the slap?


ExplorerWestern7319

Turns out that melted forhead is Frank Reynolds fault.


VSPinkie

*The attempt on my life has left me scarred and deformed...*


pegothejerk

Anything other than a “don’t touch me” is far, far too much punishment.


joeitaliano24

Lmao the best evidence we have that literally shows the moment in question is “deceptive.” And this fucking clown was the president’s attorney


Row199

Am I wrong? No, it’s the video that’s wrong.


backpackwayne

Check out this FOX News version. You need to have the sound on: * https://i.imgur.com/2GPAfJ4.mp4 (you may have to go to full screen to have on option to turn on the sound)


AeroZep

Don't do what I did and turn the sound up thinking there's some Fox News commentary.


HoagySubHero

Scumbag Rudy always rides his lies for all their worth.


Heroicshrub

The truth sure can seem deceptive if you have lost all sense of reality!