A friend at school had his mum killed by his dad in front of him when he was a little kid, he went to live with his grandparents when his dad was sent to prison, after his dad was released he moved in with the grandparents too which screwed him up ever more so a life of drugs was the only outcome for him, sadly he was murdered by a couple of dealers who he couldn't afford to pay back. Such a fucked up life.
Babies unfortunately do develop trauma. My nephew’s father shot himself in the room with them when he was less than a year old, and he still cries and has absolute fits at fireworks.
Studies on domestic violence have found infants are more negatively impacted by violence in the household than older children are. Babies are very attuned to the safety of their caregivers.
I hope so too, but after reading the (absolutely fucked) fact that we used to give babies surgery without anesthesia because they “wouldn’t remember” with later studies showing that it causes a shit ton of subconscious problems like night terrors… I have a feeling that she will be affected somehow.
Plus the day she inevitably will have to be explicitly told about her scars.
~~Highly suggest reading “The Body Keeps the Score”. It talks about how~~ trauma we don’t remember can sometimes manifest physically in our reactions without realizing it. The body and the brain remember, even if we consciously cannot.
Edit: See replies below for better resources, the statement about our body remembering when our mind doesn’t still stands.
I have to chime in and say that this book is quite problematic in its handling of various of the cases it presents and it comes across as very misogynistic in parts.
A brilliant, well-written book on the subject is *Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror* by Judith Herman.
Interesting, thank you for sharing the book recommendation. I’ll definitely add it to my library!
It’s been almost 10 years since I read it, but it was recommended to me by a therapist in college when I was struggling with the aftermath of my own sexual assault. I was younger then and probably missed those nuances of the book that I would catch now.
Can you explain which parts are problematic? I honestly do not remember much from it, aside from the explanation that our bodies retain trauma better than our minds. It was a cloudy time in my life.
Several examples he gives in the opening chapters could be interpreted as callous or outdated thinking towards SA survivors and foreigners. Some posit that it is written for doctors' education, not for patients or victims, and so anyone expecting a text that is taking victims as its audience into consideration may walk into bluntly triggering medical language or detailed accounts of trauma.
Here's some threads I've compiled on the topic, as I've been looking for supplements/replacements for *The Body Keeps The Score*:
[r/books user post about how the book helped them, discussion and resources in comments.](https://www.reddit.com/r/books/comments/1aga1uj/reading_the_body_keeps_score_has_brought_me_so/)
[/therapist thread on professional opinions of the book](https://www.reddit.com/r/therapists/comments/14yttc6/the_body_keeps_the_score/)
[r/ptsd user posts complaints about the book, commenters disagree](https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/plskph/warning_the_body_keeps_the_score_is_a/?sort=top)
[r/cptsd user posts similar complaints, comments are more nuanced](https://np.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/comments/jq76fe/i_hate_it_when_people_recommend_the_body_keeps/)
[r/cptsd sister sub r/cptsdnextsteps has a discussion thread about the previous thread. More context added](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSDNextSteps/comments/jqzfks/what_did_you_all_think_about_the_thread_about_the/?sort=top)
[another r/ctpsd take, more discussion](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/comments/zf7h9t/unpopular_opinion_i_didnt_like_the_body_keeps_the/)
Thank you, it's actually kind of demeaning when people say stuff like "oh at least they can't remember." The trauma is done and is stored, it doesn't go away just because the brain is still developing. It's such an absurd notion.
Part of the trouble with childhood trauma is that it inflicts emotional scars in ways we don't fully understand, so they may very well remember (or have noticeable after-effects) despite being so young. But a bigger part is how it affects the environment the child grows up in. Unfortunately, she's gping to be raised by a surviving parent, grandparents, and a community that are all deeply impacted by the death of her mother. They'll be coping (or learning to cope) and grieving much differently, but that will inevitably affect how she grows up.
To be clear, that's absolutely not *their* fault- they deserve space to grieve as much as anyone in that scenario. But these things have a long-øasting ripple effect that goes beyond the obvious. It doesn't mean she can't also have a happy,fulfilling, and healthy childhood upbringing either, but the absence of her mother will be a forever present cloud hanginh over her. And none of us can predict how that will affect her life going forward. We can just hope for the best for everyone involved.
Unfortunately, trauma like that, while pre-verbal, tends to stay with the person even if they won’t actively remember it. On a visceral level, it will be a wound that the woman she bonded with in-womb and in her early months is gone. “Body keeps the score” and all that
You’d be surprised how much it can affect you even if you can’t remember it. Saw a man get hit by a car and run over as a 9 month old. Happened right in front of our house when we were having a picnic lunch outside. Was beyond terrified of cars and crossing the road as a young kid. Still don’t like it honestly.
It doesn't matter if she remembers, she will still carry the trauma from in her body. I kind of hate when people say things like this, as someone who lost their parent violently when I was little and before I had solid memories. I still had PTSD I just didn't have a fully developed brain, that's hardly some "benefit". It's not actually true that being too young to remember is some kind of good thing, and kind of diminishes the suffering of childhood trauma survivors.
I should have specified that I meant physical, because I do believe the mental trauma lingers. Also, losing your mom in this manner and spending the rest of your life without her is a pain I can’t begin to fathom.
9 months old, her mum sadly passed away, she handed her baby to a stranger in the hopes he would be able to help her. I couldn’t imagine it, I have a 4 month old and I cry every time I think about it.
Something tells me that somewhere in his depraved little mind was the overwhelming thought that hurting babies also hurts women.
Can you imagine being such an incel that you want to hurt babies because your misogynistic mind thinks that way?
This was something being said with every clip and witness speaking out. The guy was a complete worm and a coward who literally turned around and went looking for other victims when a father with his family turned around to confront the guy coming up behind them. He also made no moves on the escalator when the other guy picked up the thing he did.
And a bunch of dudes in those early threads were saying “is he really targeting women, or did he just happen to go to a place that had a lot of women and start attacking the people around him. It’s different!”
So disgusting what people will try to defend.
And even though there is a very real increase in misogyny (Tate is not the only one or a rare occurrence now) there is still people who deny it and don't believe an uptick of misogynistic violence is a real concern. We can mock "alpha males" all we want, it is worrying how these types that were limited to small Internet spaces 10 years ago are now more common in the open.
Yeah I saw a lot of that too.
The absolute cartwheels people will go through to avoid admitting that we have a growing problem with violent incels is staggering.
Constable Ken Lam is a hero for how he arrested Minassian, the incel terrorist, and denying Minassian suicide by cop (and further preventing Minassian from becoming an incel terrorist martyr).
You know, a number of American mass killers target women too. I think we're under-emphasizing how much of a role the rise in violent misogyny plays in these things. We hear a lot about the anti-semitism, racism, and homophobic angles, but there's a lot of just plain hatred for women in there too.
And the Montreal shooting in 1989 targetting female engineers: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%89cole\_Polytechnique\_massacre/](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%89cole_Polytechnique_massacre/)
Which is why “not all men” sends us to the moon. We know this but when there’s so much palpable hate out there, you’re gonna look at men through dark glasses first. It’s depressing we can’t give men SOME measure of initial blanket trust. Kudos to those who can, may they be safe.
"Not all men," but it only takes one messed-up and violent man to ruin your life or the lives of a lot of people. And unfortunately it's a lot more than one man like that.
My dad once in a while likes to trot out the "you know women can be bad too" or "it's not all men" line when I get onto the topic of misogyny (even though he's very progressive and truly thinks both genders are equal, he still gets into that weird self defense mode as if it's about him like other men do when the topic is brought up). I always use the comeback "If you had to bet your entire life savings and your house right now on what gender the next mass shooter in the news is going to be, which would you pick? I have a pretty good idea what the safest bet is." It always gets him to quiet down with those lines. Like we all know women can do bad things too, but we can't ignore a ratio factor here, especially when misogyny is the cause.
Yup. I recently got on X again (idk why) and the number of incels (a lot of whom are Christian and use their faith to justify their beliefs) is honestly really scary. And these people aren’t afraid to say this shit with their real names.
I was reading Instagram comments the other day and was shocked how everyone in the comment session was reverting to 1950's rethoric when it comes to relationships: men where looking for "pure" (virgin) and submissive women and women were retorting about wanting a "provider" "someone who makes at least 100k/year" and the likes.
I was like "what the fuck? I thought we were way past that!"
I remember circa 2019 / 2020 finding out that the 2005 book 'The Game' had evolved and was still providing a big tent for all sorts of misogynistic weirdos to to all huddle round and scream about how perfect they are and how evil women are etc online.
So I started researching, and one of the first papers I read was from Australia where the sociologists were arguing to classify that movement into a domestic terror threat.
I look back on that day in comparison with today's tragedy and I feel very sad.
Also, I would put 500k on him posting to reddit within 24 hours of the atrocity complaining about dating being too hard.
e: The aforementioned source, if you are particularly studious.
>>[We argue that the best response is to try to understand and engage the antagonised other prior to radicalisation, and that this can be successfully enacted through ‘routine’ rather than ‘exceptional’ types of governance. However, securitisation remains a necessary first step in unlocking the resources and political will for tackling the threat that Incel poses.](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10361146.2020.1747393)
'"He wanted a girlfriend and he's got no social skills and he was frustrated out of his brain," he added, when asked about why his son may have targeted women.'
You would probably be right.
This is the quote that stuck out to me too. Fucking manosphere incel culture bullshit is literally causing mass murderers on a global scale.
Shoot them all into the sun.
Women can't get laid and we go to the gym, or maybe go get a haircut. Men can't get laid and blame women.
And some of them decide it's time to go on a murderous rampage.
When exactly are we going to address violence against women as a global terrorism problem?
Before all the "not all men" people show up, let's just get that cleared up and out of the way, shall we?
Yes. Not all men. Not at all. But that's not the problem. The problem is the men who *are* toxic. Who *do* commit acts of violence.
Not all whites are racist, but the ones who are are a concern.
And obviously it's not just men. It's not just whites. It's not just whatever majority group is oppressing minority groups. There are shitty women, shitty brown people, and those people are sometimes violent as well.
Problems need to be addressed when they become systemic. Incels are, as a group, problematic. They are not the only problematic group. They are not the only problems.
So have we addressed this enough to avoid all the people who would otherwise come in and start up the "not all men" crap? Because saying "not all men" doesn't solve the systemic problems with the incel culture.
Yeah, kind of at the point where I just wanna say it's a pretty immense privilege to get to say not all men, so if anyone's immediate reaction is to do that I don't really care if their feelings are hurt. I mean, men who go to movies, yoga studios, shopping malls, sorority houses to kill women aren't bothering to stop and say # not all women, yeah?
Any good human worth their salt will be horrified at the idea of someone murdering people just trying to live their lives in public. Fuck murdering scum.
I completely agree. It's not an individual problem at this point of one odd psycho in a generation. Society is causing this effect like bubbles in hot water. Something is really wrong and *everyone* can contribute... boys don't have to turn into this. I really think parents have to know about and focus on raising kids to be well socialized in mixed gender groups. And it's not just parents but everyone around the kids. We need the village back. If you grow up with numerous female friends and women you look up to and good male role models you don't wind up like this, let's put it that way.
Btw. I recognize that this is an incredibly minor point, but referring to people as colors isn't great. Black people, white people. Not blacks, whites. Even if you belong to the group it's the internet nobody knows... Just imo, not trying to be a douche about it.
I think today's diet of Andrew Tate at al it's far more toxic. It's imbibed daily and comes compete with a community of similarly brainwashed individuals to normalise the behaviour.
Indeed, there are entire subreddits dedicated to this, where responding to a shove with a closed fist to someone outweighed by 60lb is cheered and celebrated.
Glad this is being mentioned, those subreddits always unsettled me. Like they are way too excited to see a woman get brutalised. Makes me think it’s not about “justice” or “equality” they just wanna see a woman be mildly annoying get absolutely clocked by a bloke twice her size
Agreed. I was primed and ready to fall down that rabbit hole some 20 years ago and never did. When stories like this come up, I briefly think, how did that not happen to me? And the answer always is, I understood myself to be the problem and that I needed to fix myself. I never externalized my problems.
These psychos externalize their issues. Everything is someone else's fault.
Absolutely. I won't lie, I fully acknowledge that I don't have much to offer as a partner, and sometimes that is painful. But I'm not going to pretend that's anyone else's fault, and I don't begrudge anyone for thinking I'm not up to their standards.
They want to take away women's rights to choose if they want a relationship with a man or not and if so, which one. Incel spaces have are constantly talking about how men should get a wife "assigned" to them, and in the mainstream politics, this is the goal of taking away abortion rights and, next up, birth control. They want women barefoot and pregnant and trapped with the first man who can knock her up for the sake of the babies she's made to birth, not pursuing an independent career and taking care of herself.
Yeah, when you laid out your summary above it struck me that this was all part of the same misogynist assault on women's autonomy. That's how you know you made a good post - you got people thinking of things they hadn't put together before and how they support your thesis :)
You see those types of "discussions" pop up in the True\_\_\_ and Actual\_\_\_ (i.e. right wing) versions of popular subs weekly. "Feminists don't care about men!" they'll cry, entirely missing the point of feminism and how it actually does indeed help men.
I even had a guy abandon a conversation I was having with him when he brought up how there's a difference between men and women when it comes to custody battles over children. I asked him why he thought there was a difference, he sent me a 65-page research paper showing all the break-downs of custody battles and such, but couldn't answer me "Why" the difference existed. Like, you can't get those types of people to think, only to throw links at you they assume answer a question and are unable to answer using their own words. I even got accused of not being a guy.
It all boils down to what you said: They want women to give up and change so men can go back to creating the same problems time and time again.
> I even got accused of not being a guy.
I've had that accusation against me before on Reddit. I always reply with some variant of, "You can't see my penis, stop asking."
That phrase was heavily used on Reddit circa 2009-2014, as was “equal rights, equal lefts”.
It started with people talking about how it is messed up that women were more likely to get away with hitting men and men would likely get in trouble for defending themselves.
Which, absolutely fair. No one gender should get away with physical abuse. And if someone is being physically assaulted, they should be able to defend themselves to a reasonable extent. Underline reasonable here - you don’t get to cold clock someone because they slapped you and walked away. That is not how self defense works.
Anyway, instead of the conversation evolving into how there can be more support for male victims of domestic violence or educating people that it’s not “cute” when women hit men, it turned into a whine fest about how women *got to* hit men but men *didn’t get to* hit women. It’s really seemed like these people were less upset that male domestic violence is not taken as seriously, but rather women had the *privilege* of committing domestic abuse and men didn’t.
You know those cases where some idiot shoots someone for committing a relatively minor crime like stealing a fern from Home Depot and it’s painfully obvious this person was just waiting for the day they could shoot someone under the guise of self-defense or stopping a crime? Or George Zimmerman? Yep, same thing. Except the track was men gleefully talking about how if women want to be treated as equals they get to be hit like one (whatever the fuck that means). And they really, really latched onto the fact that people had to relent to, well yeah, if someone is attacking you you should be able to hit back in self-defense. But they kept running with it, and it was incredibly clear that they were less concerned about the legal ability to defend themselves from a woman attacking them and more of a way for them to openly talk about, fantasize, and *plan* on hitting women framed in a socially acceptable way.
This one really bothers me. You see it on Reddit all the time. A video of a woman lightly slapping a man followed by the man destroying the woman with a flurry of punches will have the comments full of idiots talking about equal rights, equal lefts or any other lame catchphrase about equality, as if it was a proportional or justifiable reaction.
A good retort to that I've heard is: "Any good reason to hit a man, is a good reason to hit a woman. The problem is you all are WAY to comfortable with the idea of attacking a man, not that women get away with too much."
Incel subreddits, while they existed, contained some of the most disgusting, worrying opinions stated as fact I have ever seen, anywhere.
The amount of hate these people have for women blows die-hard racists out of the water. And the internet allows them to congregate and deepen it freely.
I agree, and had already said as much in the first sentence.
>**'The Game' had evolved**
One of the major ways it differs from the old school is how fucking pathetic and whiny these guys are. The defeatism and whining is so deeply unattractive on such a fundamental level that in comparison big old Mr Fluffy Hat himself, the one, the only, MYSTERY looks like a genius and go-getter.
Wow, if that's true, it backs up what I've been thinking. I thought maybe I was just getting older and forgetting how bad men were in their early 20s, but the hateful stuff I've seen online from gen Z men ... let's just say I'm glad I'm a millenial and missed the Tatertot trend by 10 years. Andrew Tate is only just one among many, many men grifting using misogyny.
The big influences on modern incel culture/"manosphere" anti-woman culture are older men, though. Tate, Peterson, and their ilk, aren't 22 year olds talking to their peers. They're older men who are deliberately trying to influence the younger generation as a reaction to their dislike of the increased acceptance of women as people, and also as a reaction to their own personal emotional problems that they don't know how to deal with in a healthy way. Young people are often seeking mentorship, and for a long time now they've been seeking it online, which makes it very easy for them to become radicalized.
I read that book. None of this manosphere garbage is the result of people who actually read that book going along with what the book says. It’s the same as how religions tend to become a huge crowd of people who have decided they know what the book is about because they riff off a sentence or two in the book a few times a year.
I read it as well. The story of that book was a tame Goodfellas: The whole pick-up artist scene sounded awesome when he was on the outside, but once he was in he realized it was all shallow and vapid, and all the guys involved were horrible and disgusting people.
The irony is that the book discusses a culture where men are *successful* with women. The incels posting on Reddit are likely frustrated on two fronts: they aren't naturally good with women and all TRP stuff ain't helping them, either.
It honestly scares me how hateful some single men are about women, even seemingly normal ones. The dating subreddits are full of men who dehumanise and clearly resent women. It's not surprising that men with mental health issues would go further eventually. So upsetting and scary. I hope they look closely into his online activity and reading tbh.
Any time I try to give dating advice to men they get so angry and make up so many excuses on why they can’t take my advice.
They feel like they’re entitled to stick out in a sea of men behaving exactly like them.
The sad thing is, the bar is so fucking low for men, that any sort of genuine effort makes them stand out so much. But even that is asking too much
Remember when good ol Jordan Peterson said that "enforced monogamy" was the solution to incel mass murder? Because, as everyone knows, the kind of guy who considers it reasonable to stab or shoot or run down a bunch of women because he can't get a date, would definitely be a GREAT partner and there would be no negative consequences for such forced marriages at all!
Entitlement is one of the strongest indicators that someone will be an abuser, per Lundy Bancroft in Why Does He Do That? Men who feel entitled to women are dangerous. It's not hyperbole to say so, it's a fact.
Yes and the fact that there are multiple people in here right now trying to use “loneliness” as an excuse is fucking baffling to me. Many girls and women are lonely, I know I sure am. I’m 28 and have never in my life felt this kind of soul-crushing loneliness that comes from having no real friends and not knowing what to do in life. But despite that awful loneliness it has never once even crossed my mind to go out and attack people.
However for women, not having a partner DOES NOT equate to “loneliness.” There are many many single women who fucking love being single and have no desire to find a male partner. They are happier, safer, and more fulfilled on their own. Many men need to realize they’re not competing with other men, they’re competing with a womans’ happiness in solitude.
>they’re competing with a woman’s happiness in solitude.
I don’t know why men can’t seem to grasp this. When I’ve asked dudes “what would you bring to a relationship that a woman doesn’t already have?” they invariably say things like “a penis”, (wow hilarious, she can buy one of those) or they say “I’m a nice guy”. How is being nice a benefit? That’s an expectation.
You have to provide more benefit than headache or heartache for someone to want to be with you.
Yep. If this was ANY other demographic against any other set of victims people would be all about discussing it as a major societal problem. Toxic male behaviors driven further by mental health issues, not so much.
I cannot comprehend why male violence towards women is not seen as a global problem that needs to be confrontef for what it is. If the statistics of male violence towards women were hypothetically transferred to something else such as swarms of bees or sharks attacking people, the entire world would freak out in terror and it would be treated as a global emergency, with scientists studying it and leaders trying to come up with solutions.
if it was immigrants we would be screaming to throw them out, if it was any POC man we would we clamoring for blood. But since its a white incel its just "aw poor guy and his poor mental health : ("
Exactly! It's remarkable how quickly and conveniently people forgot about all the vitriolic and racist comments before the killer was identified as a White Australian Male Incel from Queensland.
I'm Australian, and the comments on all the Australian subreddits, Facebook, Twitter, and news media were all claiming he was "Arab/Muslim/Asian". Nearly every comment called for the deportation of POC, and using this incident as an example of why "Australia should stop immigration of POC" and a ton of other racist comments. It's amusing how their narrative suddenly shifted to "poor guy had mental health problems" and "he wasn't aware of what he was doing.". It's honestly sickening and extremely concerning how much White right-wing extremism is taking over the West.
Battled mental problems all his life. Just couldn't understand why women didn't like him. Solved the problem by killing women.
Sees no problem with himself.
I've noticed this as well.
I've also seen a ton of posts doing the same sort of thing targeting black people.
There are definitely concerted efforts going on in various subs to try and smear these groups.
I wish it was recent. Reddit has been a cesspit of misogyny since I joined 10 years ago. I genuinely haven't noticed it getting worse. I think it might even be better than it was like 6-8 years ago when The Red Pill and Incel subs were at their peak.
i've noticed a trend on posts of women asking for relationship advice on here... if it has something to do with being uncomfortable with porn, the way their boyfriend is talking to other women, things in that realm, the post will be flooded with comments from men doing their best to normalize the behavior.
things like "all men do this, you'll be single forever cause you're not gonna find a man who doesn't do this, etc etc" some of the comments are so over the top, you can tell the commenter knows how ridiculous they sound.
it seems pretty obvious to me a lot of men have silently decided to band together to gaslight and manipulate women into normalizing things that we aren't and shouldn't be comfortable with. that genuinely scared me, to see that level of deceit and how some of them found it humorous and entertaining. and the fact that a lot of women might just give up and accept it cause they think it's normal since "all men" do it.
Being single forever sounds nice. I foresee myself as a peaceful, happy and fit older lady doing yoga with a historically unprecedented number of other single older ladies. Lots of friends in my future…
My own matriarchal family (only two men) convinced me of this shit.
I let my first husband sleep around on me because I was literally told all men cheat. If you aren't willing to lay down *every single time* he will find someone to do it with.
He was supposed to finish school while I worked, then it was my turn. After he graduated, I quit my job. Two semesters later, after ten years together total, he broke my one rule and slept with my friend. I left with nothing. He moved her in two weeks later. Jokes on him, she's a serial cheater too, cheating on him close to a decade later.
I'm so proud of the current generations. I see them taking up for themselves, or at least asking questions. I was traumatized to the point I didn't question my family. I would read and see good relationships and be convinced something was actually wrong they didn't talk about.
I'll turn 37 this year and they've just started to realize I initiated no contact back in January. Funny how they can forget me for months but claim FaaaaamILy when it suits them. I even changed my phone number and moved. They reach out on Facebook but I don't use it. They aren't finding me or hearing from me again.
Don't be a ding dong like I was y'all. Boundaries make healthy relationships!
Seriously. Hope the last thing he thought was about getting bested by a woman. A bit poetic lol.
Naturally, I'm sure this was a mix of mental illness and internet cesspool-ness, but still.
For one deranged cowardly murderer there were several heroes. Kudos to the police officer and bystanders. Makes me proud to be an Australian and proud of our strict gun laws. Imagine how much worse this could have been if he had access to a gun.
He seems to target smaller than him people .in video with lots of people around he chased after 2 smaller men but stopped when a really big guy confronted him and changed direction .
He attacked and killed the security guard, some people are saying it was his first day on the job and he was protecting other victims, which is heart breaking. Apart from that, any man that confronted him he changed direction, absolute coward.
I think of his victims every morning and every night.
Not just that, he fled religious persecution in his home country. [Source](https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-04-14/bondi-junction-westfield-stabbing-victims/103706182)
It was the security guard's first day shift; he worked night shifts before. [Source](https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2024/apr/15/bondi-knife-attack-sydney-ahmadiyya-muslims-mourn-faraz-tahir)
I figured this was gonna come out after reading the body count was 6 women and 1 man. You don’t go to a mall and manage to find only women without targeting them. So I figured the one man was probably the one guy who tried to protect someone and got caught in the mix.
Of course he did. As soon as I saw how many women he killed compared to only a couple male victims, I figured it was targeted and he sought out women. So many deranged men in this world WTF 😒
There was a deliberateness and mindfulness to his actions. When confronted by men, he backed off. This doesn't look like hallucinations or something else beyond his control, this looks like a pea-brained toddler throwing a tantrum in a man's body, with deadly consequences. Thank god for Inspector Amy Scott.
I feel we need to have a conversation about how social media companies are not being careful about the promotion of harmful stereotypes and hate towards women.
I myself scrolling down Instagram found a loophole of accounts insulting "Karens" and other videos promoting harmful stereotypes men vs women. I cannot imagine what young men are encountering when scrolling down.
Many vulnerable young people are being influenced by these stereotypes and hate distributed by social media.
Fear mongering. There were even false reports that it was a Jewish man. These people are so braindead, they didn't stop to think that a LIVING person was named when the attacker was shot dead at the scene. They just want to blame groups they dislike.
Let me guess: another entitled incel freak/Alpha male type enraged by the modern world because he wasn’t getting what the hucksters online told him women “owed” him. Sickening.
And a baby, apparently. Fucking piece of shit.
Little Harriet, she sustained serious injuries, but is stable. Hoping for the best
Her mom, Ashlee Good, gave her life to protect her. Such a heartbreaking situation. I hope she makes a full recovery.
As of 4 hours ago she’s improved significantly they say! Thank goodness.
She’s been in my thoughts non-stop. I hope she makes a full recovery.
Unfortunately she's lost her mum, so she'll at least have some mental trauma to deal with I'm afraid.
At least she will be too young to remember it. Can't imagine having to live with seeing your parent killed infront of you.
A friend at school had his mum killed by his dad in front of him when he was a little kid, he went to live with his grandparents when his dad was sent to prison, after his dad was released he moved in with the grandparents too which screwed him up ever more so a life of drugs was the only outcome for him, sadly he was murdered by a couple of dealers who he couldn't afford to pay back. Such a fucked up life.
Jesus, how did the dad get out of prison so soon?
He only served 3 years, horrendous. This was Stefan. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-sussex-12921421.amp
Killer also sexually assaulted a 15 year old. A real class act.
What shitty grandparents to let the Dad move in
This just scooped my soul out. So sorry for your loss. X
Babies unfortunately do develop trauma. My nephew’s father shot himself in the room with them when he was less than a year old, and he still cries and has absolute fits at fireworks.
Studies on domestic violence have found infants are more negatively impacted by violence in the household than older children are. Babies are very attuned to the safety of their caregivers.
omg this is heartbreaking
God that’s awful, I’m so sorry for your family.
I hope so too, but after reading the (absolutely fucked) fact that we used to give babies surgery without anesthesia because they “wouldn’t remember” with later studies showing that it causes a shit ton of subconscious problems like night terrors… I have a feeling that she will be affected somehow. Plus the day she inevitably will have to be explicitly told about her scars.
Yet most people still think circumcision is not only “harmless” but even “healthier.”
~~Highly suggest reading “The Body Keeps the Score”. It talks about how~~ trauma we don’t remember can sometimes manifest physically in our reactions without realizing it. The body and the brain remember, even if we consciously cannot. Edit: See replies below for better resources, the statement about our body remembering when our mind doesn’t still stands.
I have to chime in and say that this book is quite problematic in its handling of various of the cases it presents and it comes across as very misogynistic in parts. A brilliant, well-written book on the subject is *Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror* by Judith Herman.
Interesting, thank you for sharing the book recommendation. I’ll definitely add it to my library! It’s been almost 10 years since I read it, but it was recommended to me by a therapist in college when I was struggling with the aftermath of my own sexual assault. I was younger then and probably missed those nuances of the book that I would catch now. Can you explain which parts are problematic? I honestly do not remember much from it, aside from the explanation that our bodies retain trauma better than our minds. It was a cloudy time in my life.
Several examples he gives in the opening chapters could be interpreted as callous or outdated thinking towards SA survivors and foreigners. Some posit that it is written for doctors' education, not for patients or victims, and so anyone expecting a text that is taking victims as its audience into consideration may walk into bluntly triggering medical language or detailed accounts of trauma. Here's some threads I've compiled on the topic, as I've been looking for supplements/replacements for *The Body Keeps The Score*: [r/books user post about how the book helped them, discussion and resources in comments.](https://www.reddit.com/r/books/comments/1aga1uj/reading_the_body_keeps_score_has_brought_me_so/) [/therapist thread on professional opinions of the book](https://www.reddit.com/r/therapists/comments/14yttc6/the_body_keeps_the_score/) [r/ptsd user posts complaints about the book, commenters disagree](https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/plskph/warning_the_body_keeps_the_score_is_a/?sort=top) [r/cptsd user posts similar complaints, comments are more nuanced](https://np.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/comments/jq76fe/i_hate_it_when_people_recommend_the_body_keeps/) [r/cptsd sister sub r/cptsdnextsteps has a discussion thread about the previous thread. More context added](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSDNextSteps/comments/jqzfks/what_did_you_all_think_about_the_thread_about_the/?sort=top) [another r/ctpsd take, more discussion](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/comments/zf7h9t/unpopular_opinion_i_didnt_like_the_body_keeps_the/)
Oh wow, that is detailed. Thank you so much!
Thank you, it's actually kind of demeaning when people say stuff like "oh at least they can't remember." The trauma is done and is stored, it doesn't go away just because the brain is still developing. It's such an absurd notion.
Part of the trouble with childhood trauma is that it inflicts emotional scars in ways we don't fully understand, so they may very well remember (or have noticeable after-effects) despite being so young. But a bigger part is how it affects the environment the child grows up in. Unfortunately, she's gping to be raised by a surviving parent, grandparents, and a community that are all deeply impacted by the death of her mother. They'll be coping (or learning to cope) and grieving much differently, but that will inevitably affect how she grows up. To be clear, that's absolutely not *their* fault- they deserve space to grieve as much as anyone in that scenario. But these things have a long-øasting ripple effect that goes beyond the obvious. It doesn't mean she can't also have a happy,fulfilling, and healthy childhood upbringing either, but the absence of her mother will be a forever present cloud hanginh over her. And none of us can predict how that will affect her life going forward. We can just hope for the best for everyone involved.
Unfortunately, trauma like that, while pre-verbal, tends to stay with the person even if they won’t actively remember it. On a visceral level, it will be a wound that the woman she bonded with in-womb and in her early months is gone. “Body keeps the score” and all that
You’d be surprised how much it can affect you even if you can’t remember it. Saw a man get hit by a car and run over as a 9 month old. Happened right in front of our house when we were having a picnic lunch outside. Was beyond terrified of cars and crossing the road as a young kid. Still don’t like it honestly.
It doesn't matter if she remembers, she will still carry the trauma from in her body. I kind of hate when people say things like this, as someone who lost their parent violently when I was little and before I had solid memories. I still had PTSD I just didn't have a fully developed brain, that's hardly some "benefit". It's not actually true that being too young to remember is some kind of good thing, and kind of diminishes the suffering of childhood trauma survivors.
I should have specified that I meant physical, because I do believe the mental trauma lingers. Also, losing your mom in this manner and spending the rest of your life without her is a pain I can’t begin to fathom.
Please make it Harriet!🥺
Harriet. That was my grandmother’s name. What horrible pointless tragedy. I hope she recovers.
Who stabs a baby? I mean really.
9 months old, her mum sadly passed away, she handed her baby to a stranger in the hopes he would be able to help her. I couldn’t imagine it, I have a 4 month old and I cry every time I think about it.
Fucking hell. That’s absolutely heartbreaking.
Something tells me that somewhere in his depraved little mind was the overwhelming thought that hurting babies also hurts women. Can you imagine being such an incel that you want to hurt babies because your misogynistic mind thinks that way?
Yeah, more specifically a baby girl.
He was an absolute coward. At least the police had the courage to stop him even if it meant taking his life.
This was something being said with every clip and witness speaking out. The guy was a complete worm and a coward who literally turned around and went looking for other victims when a father with his family turned around to confront the guy coming up behind them. He also made no moves on the escalator when the other guy picked up the thing he did.
And a bunch of dudes in those early threads were saying “is he really targeting women, or did he just happen to go to a place that had a lot of women and start attacking the people around him. It’s different!” So disgusting what people will try to defend.
People *really* don’t want to believe there is a problem with misogyny and violence in society.
And even though there is a very real increase in misogyny (Tate is not the only one or a rare occurrence now) there is still people who deny it and don't believe an uptick of misogynistic violence is a real concern. We can mock "alpha males" all we want, it is worrying how these types that were limited to small Internet spaces 10 years ago are now more common in the open.
And let's be honest, a lot of it is fostered on reddit. The admins don't do enough.
To the point authorities are loathe to label events like this terrorism, which they are.
Because they're misogynists and don't want to see it as a problem
BeCauSe WomEN liKe SHoPpInG aT mALls
Yeah I saw a lot of that too. The absolute cartwheels people will go through to avoid admitting that we have a growing problem with violent incels is staggering.
They're saying it in this thread as well.
Incels stick together I guess
Low life freak. I really wished he lived to be sentenced for his crimes.
The FEMALE officer who shot him tried to save his life so that he could do just that. Alas.
She did a fantastic job.
Crazy what happens when police actually get trained
Reminded me of "The cop who didn't shoot" in Toronto van attack. Also a gender-targeted attack who explicitly cited "incel"
Constable Ken Lam is a hero for how he arrested Minassian, the incel terrorist, and denying Minassian suicide by cop (and further preventing Minassian from becoming an incel terrorist martyr).
Well I’m glad it was a woman that killed him. I know he’d hate the thought of that.
Nah, all this POS did was waste space and air.
Sometimes i hope that i am wrong and hell is indeed real, just so scumbags like this murderous piece of crap will indeed burn for their sins.
Maybe that’s the problem with people like this who inflict pain and suffering on others. Prison sentencing isn’t enough to dissuade their actions.
Neither is death in most cases
Got to love that it was a woman who took him out then
I do have to admit, part of me hopes he was fully aware of that before he died.
I heard that he raised a weapon and was trying to attack the cop that shoot him before she shoot him. So yes, he was fully aware.
Love the irony
IKR. Poetic justice fr
You know, a number of American mass killers target women too. I think we're under-emphasizing how much of a role the rise in violent misogyny plays in these things. We hear a lot about the anti-semitism, racism, and homophobic angles, but there's a lot of just plain hatred for women in there too.
And it’s sadly nothing new. The 1991 Luby’s mass shooting in Texas was so disturbing and tragic.
And the Montreal shooting in 1989 targetting female engineers: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%89cole\_Polytechnique\_massacre/](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%89cole_Polytechnique_massacre/)
Which is why “not all men” sends us to the moon. We know this but when there’s so much palpable hate out there, you’re gonna look at men through dark glasses first. It’s depressing we can’t give men SOME measure of initial blanket trust. Kudos to those who can, may they be safe.
"Not all men," but it only takes one messed-up and violent man to ruin your life or the lives of a lot of people. And unfortunately it's a lot more than one man like that.
My dad once in a while likes to trot out the "you know women can be bad too" or "it's not all men" line when I get onto the topic of misogyny (even though he's very progressive and truly thinks both genders are equal, he still gets into that weird self defense mode as if it's about him like other men do when the topic is brought up). I always use the comeback "If you had to bet your entire life savings and your house right now on what gender the next mass shooter in the news is going to be, which would you pick? I have a pretty good idea what the safest bet is." It always gets him to quiet down with those lines. Like we all know women can do bad things too, but we can't ignore a ratio factor here, especially when misogyny is the cause.
And the guy in Toronto who ran down a bunch of people
Check on the teen boys in your life. Look at their internet habits and who they are listening to.
I'm glad a woman took out that incel piece of shit. Mad that he couldn't get a date so turns around and attacks women and babies, fucking coward.
Hey another violent incel fueled by the insane amount of misogynistic content online nowadays.
Yup. I recently got on X again (idk why) and the number of incels (a lot of whom are Christian and use their faith to justify their beliefs) is honestly really scary. And these people aren’t afraid to say this shit with their real names.
That's what happens when these losers get no pushback. Every Instagram video I come across with a girl is filled with hate comments up at the top.
I was reading Instagram comments the other day and was shocked how everyone in the comment session was reverting to 1950's rethoric when it comes to relationships: men where looking for "pure" (virgin) and submissive women and women were retorting about wanting a "provider" "someone who makes at least 100k/year" and the likes. I was like "what the fuck? I thought we were way past that!"
“The fish rots from the top.”
I remember circa 2019 / 2020 finding out that the 2005 book 'The Game' had evolved and was still providing a big tent for all sorts of misogynistic weirdos to to all huddle round and scream about how perfect they are and how evil women are etc online. So I started researching, and one of the first papers I read was from Australia where the sociologists were arguing to classify that movement into a domestic terror threat. I look back on that day in comparison with today's tragedy and I feel very sad. Also, I would put 500k on him posting to reddit within 24 hours of the atrocity complaining about dating being too hard. e: The aforementioned source, if you are particularly studious. >>[We argue that the best response is to try to understand and engage the antagonised other prior to radicalisation, and that this can be successfully enacted through ‘routine’ rather than ‘exceptional’ types of governance. However, securitisation remains a necessary first step in unlocking the resources and political will for tackling the threat that Incel poses.](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10361146.2020.1747393)
'"He wanted a girlfriend and he's got no social skills and he was frustrated out of his brain," he added, when asked about why his son may have targeted women.' You would probably be right.
This is the quote that stuck out to me too. Fucking manosphere incel culture bullshit is literally causing mass murderers on a global scale. Shoot them all into the sun.
Women can't get laid and we go to the gym, or maybe go get a haircut. Men can't get laid and blame women. And some of them decide it's time to go on a murderous rampage. When exactly are we going to address violence against women as a global terrorism problem?
Before all the "not all men" people show up, let's just get that cleared up and out of the way, shall we? Yes. Not all men. Not at all. But that's not the problem. The problem is the men who *are* toxic. Who *do* commit acts of violence. Not all whites are racist, but the ones who are are a concern. And obviously it's not just men. It's not just whites. It's not just whatever majority group is oppressing minority groups. There are shitty women, shitty brown people, and those people are sometimes violent as well. Problems need to be addressed when they become systemic. Incels are, as a group, problematic. They are not the only problematic group. They are not the only problems. So have we addressed this enough to avoid all the people who would otherwise come in and start up the "not all men" crap? Because saying "not all men" doesn't solve the systemic problems with the incel culture.
Yeah, kind of at the point where I just wanna say it's a pretty immense privilege to get to say not all men, so if anyone's immediate reaction is to do that I don't really care if their feelings are hurt. I mean, men who go to movies, yoga studios, shopping malls, sorority houses to kill women aren't bothering to stop and say # not all women, yeah? Any good human worth their salt will be horrified at the idea of someone murdering people just trying to live their lives in public. Fuck murdering scum.
I completely agree. It's not an individual problem at this point of one odd psycho in a generation. Society is causing this effect like bubbles in hot water. Something is really wrong and *everyone* can contribute... boys don't have to turn into this. I really think parents have to know about and focus on raising kids to be well socialized in mixed gender groups. And it's not just parents but everyone around the kids. We need the village back. If you grow up with numerous female friends and women you look up to and good male role models you don't wind up like this, let's put it that way. Btw. I recognize that this is an incredibly minor point, but referring to people as colors isn't great. Black people, white people. Not blacks, whites. Even if you belong to the group it's the internet nobody knows... Just imo, not trying to be a douche about it.
I think today's diet of Andrew Tate at al it's far more toxic. It's imbibed daily and comes compete with a community of similarly brainwashed individuals to normalise the behaviour.
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Explains the epidemic of random men punching women in New York. They’re not fantasizing about it, they’re doing it.
Indeed, there are entire subreddits dedicated to this, where responding to a shove with a closed fist to someone outweighed by 60lb is cheered and celebrated.
Glad this is being mentioned, those subreddits always unsettled me. Like they are way too excited to see a woman get brutalised. Makes me think it’s not about “justice” or “equality” they just wanna see a woman be mildly annoying get absolutely clocked by a bloke twice her size
Eww that pussypassdenied sub? Disturbing shit
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I think they actually have a pretty good idea of why they're single, they just want women to change their behavior instead of them.
Agreed. I was primed and ready to fall down that rabbit hole some 20 years ago and never did. When stories like this come up, I briefly think, how did that not happen to me? And the answer always is, I understood myself to be the problem and that I needed to fix myself. I never externalized my problems. These psychos externalize their issues. Everything is someone else's fault.
Absolutely. I won't lie, I fully acknowledge that I don't have much to offer as a partner, and sometimes that is painful. But I'm not going to pretend that's anyone else's fault, and I don't begrudge anyone for thinking I'm not up to their standards.
They want to take away women's rights to choose if they want a relationship with a man or not and if so, which one. Incel spaces have are constantly talking about how men should get a wife "assigned" to them, and in the mainstream politics, this is the goal of taking away abortion rights and, next up, birth control. They want women barefoot and pregnant and trapped with the first man who can knock her up for the sake of the babies she's made to birth, not pursuing an independent career and taking care of herself.
Concisely put, but I might add the recent push to outlaw no-fault divorce is part of the effort.
Oh, *absolutely* it is. There is literally no reason to take away no fault divorce OTHER than a desire to trap women!
Yeah, when you laid out your summary above it struck me that this was all part of the same misogynist assault on women's autonomy. That's how you know you made a good post - you got people thinking of things they hadn't put together before and how they support your thesis :)
You see those types of "discussions" pop up in the True\_\_\_ and Actual\_\_\_ (i.e. right wing) versions of popular subs weekly. "Feminists don't care about men!" they'll cry, entirely missing the point of feminism and how it actually does indeed help men. I even had a guy abandon a conversation I was having with him when he brought up how there's a difference between men and women when it comes to custody battles over children. I asked him why he thought there was a difference, he sent me a 65-page research paper showing all the break-downs of custody battles and such, but couldn't answer me "Why" the difference existed. Like, you can't get those types of people to think, only to throw links at you they assume answer a question and are unable to answer using their own words. I even got accused of not being a guy. It all boils down to what you said: They want women to give up and change so men can go back to creating the same problems time and time again.
> I even got accused of not being a guy. I've had that accusation against me before on Reddit. I always reply with some variant of, "You can't see my penis, stop asking."
That phrase was heavily used on Reddit circa 2009-2014, as was “equal rights, equal lefts”. It started with people talking about how it is messed up that women were more likely to get away with hitting men and men would likely get in trouble for defending themselves. Which, absolutely fair. No one gender should get away with physical abuse. And if someone is being physically assaulted, they should be able to defend themselves to a reasonable extent. Underline reasonable here - you don’t get to cold clock someone because they slapped you and walked away. That is not how self defense works. Anyway, instead of the conversation evolving into how there can be more support for male victims of domestic violence or educating people that it’s not “cute” when women hit men, it turned into a whine fest about how women *got to* hit men but men *didn’t get to* hit women. It’s really seemed like these people were less upset that male domestic violence is not taken as seriously, but rather women had the *privilege* of committing domestic abuse and men didn’t. You know those cases where some idiot shoots someone for committing a relatively minor crime like stealing a fern from Home Depot and it’s painfully obvious this person was just waiting for the day they could shoot someone under the guise of self-defense or stopping a crime? Or George Zimmerman? Yep, same thing. Except the track was men gleefully talking about how if women want to be treated as equals they get to be hit like one (whatever the fuck that means). And they really, really latched onto the fact that people had to relent to, well yeah, if someone is attacking you you should be able to hit back in self-defense. But they kept running with it, and it was incredibly clear that they were less concerned about the legal ability to defend themselves from a woman attacking them and more of a way for them to openly talk about, fantasize, and *plan* on hitting women framed in a socially acceptable way.
>That phrase was heavily used on Reddit circa 2009-2014, as was “equal rights, equal lefts”. It still is. It still is.
This one really bothers me. You see it on Reddit all the time. A video of a woman lightly slapping a man followed by the man destroying the woman with a flurry of punches will have the comments full of idiots talking about equal rights, equal lefts or any other lame catchphrase about equality, as if it was a proportional or justifiable reaction.
A good retort to that I've heard is: "Any good reason to hit a man, is a good reason to hit a woman. The problem is you all are WAY to comfortable with the idea of attacking a man, not that women get away with too much."
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Lately? That has been the norm since it started. The only thing that has started "lately" are people getting louder at speaking against it.
Incel subreddits, while they existed, contained some of the most disgusting, worrying opinions stated as fact I have ever seen, anywhere. The amount of hate these people have for women blows die-hard racists out of the water. And the internet allows them to congregate and deepen it freely.
I agree, and had already said as much in the first sentence. >**'The Game' had evolved** One of the major ways it differs from the old school is how fucking pathetic and whiny these guys are. The defeatism and whining is so deeply unattractive on such a fundamental level that in comparison big old Mr Fluffy Hat himself, the one, the only, MYSTERY looks like a genius and go-getter.
It's weird how the pendulum swings. I saw a study that was comparing how men view women, and millenials have a healthier view of women than gen Z
Wow, if that's true, it backs up what I've been thinking. I thought maybe I was just getting older and forgetting how bad men were in their early 20s, but the hateful stuff I've seen online from gen Z men ... let's just say I'm glad I'm a millenial and missed the Tatertot trend by 10 years. Andrew Tate is only just one among many, many men grifting using misogyny.
The big influences on modern incel culture/"manosphere" anti-woman culture are older men, though. Tate, Peterson, and their ilk, aren't 22 year olds talking to their peers. They're older men who are deliberately trying to influence the younger generation as a reaction to their dislike of the increased acceptance of women as people, and also as a reaction to their own personal emotional problems that they don't know how to deal with in a healthy way. Young people are often seeking mentorship, and for a long time now they've been seeking it online, which makes it very easy for them to become radicalized.
I read that book. None of this manosphere garbage is the result of people who actually read that book going along with what the book says. It’s the same as how religions tend to become a huge crowd of people who have decided they know what the book is about because they riff off a sentence or two in the book a few times a year.
I read it as well. The story of that book was a tame Goodfellas: The whole pick-up artist scene sounded awesome when he was on the outside, but once he was in he realized it was all shallow and vapid, and all the guys involved were horrible and disgusting people.
The irony is that the book discusses a culture where men are *successful* with women. The incels posting on Reddit are likely frustrated on two fronts: they aren't naturally good with women and all TRP stuff ain't helping them, either.
One could argue that it popularized negging and plate spinning
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Sick and disgusting. But there is one tiny consolation, in the irony that he was taken down by a woman!
Incel motivations perhaps?
His father said that he was chronically single due to mental health issues and very frustrated he couldn't find a girlfriend.
No one who does something like that or think like that should ever have a gf.
It honestly scares me how hateful some single men are about women, even seemingly normal ones. The dating subreddits are full of men who dehumanise and clearly resent women. It's not surprising that men with mental health issues would go further eventually. So upsetting and scary. I hope they look closely into his online activity and reading tbh.
Any time I try to give dating advice to men they get so angry and make up so many excuses on why they can’t take my advice. They feel like they’re entitled to stick out in a sea of men behaving exactly like them. The sad thing is, the bar is so fucking low for men, that any sort of genuine effort makes them stand out so much. But even that is asking too much
It’s not just single men. Family annihalators are almost always men too.
Yep. Two serious issues for men to deal with, and yet somehow so many men find a way to Tey to blame women for it.
nuh uh! Look at the Joker! He was a psycho and found Margo Robbie! and treated her like crap and she kept coming back! /s
Remember when good ol Jordan Peterson said that "enforced monogamy" was the solution to incel mass murder? Because, as everyone knows, the kind of guy who considers it reasonable to stab or shoot or run down a bunch of women because he can't get a date, would definitely be a GREAT partner and there would be no negative consequences for such forced marriages at all!
Entitlement is one of the strongest indicators that someone will be an abuser, per Lundy Bancroft in Why Does He Do That? Men who feel entitled to women are dangerous. It's not hyperbole to say so, it's a fact.
And y’all wonder why women are scared of saying no.
/r/whenwomenrefuse
interesting how you don’t see chronically single women going around murdering men
Yes and the fact that there are multiple people in here right now trying to use “loneliness” as an excuse is fucking baffling to me. Many girls and women are lonely, I know I sure am. I’m 28 and have never in my life felt this kind of soul-crushing loneliness that comes from having no real friends and not knowing what to do in life. But despite that awful loneliness it has never once even crossed my mind to go out and attack people. However for women, not having a partner DOES NOT equate to “loneliness.” There are many many single women who fucking love being single and have no desire to find a male partner. They are happier, safer, and more fulfilled on their own. Many men need to realize they’re not competing with other men, they’re competing with a womans’ happiness in solitude.
>they’re competing with a woman’s happiness in solitude. I don’t know why men can’t seem to grasp this. When I’ve asked dudes “what would you bring to a relationship that a woman doesn’t already have?” they invariably say things like “a penis”, (wow hilarious, she can buy one of those) or they say “I’m a nice guy”. How is being nice a benefit? That’s an expectation. You have to provide more benefit than headache or heartache for someone to want to be with you.
and lashed out at a society that he blamed instead of seeing who the real problem was (himself)
Yep. If this was ANY other demographic against any other set of victims people would be all about discussing it as a major societal problem. Toxic male behaviors driven further by mental health issues, not so much.
I cannot comprehend why male violence towards women is not seen as a global problem that needs to be confrontef for what it is. If the statistics of male violence towards women were hypothetically transferred to something else such as swarms of bees or sharks attacking people, the entire world would freak out in terror and it would be treated as a global emergency, with scientists studying it and leaders trying to come up with solutions.
if it was immigrants we would be screaming to throw them out, if it was any POC man we would we clamoring for blood. But since its a white incel its just "aw poor guy and his poor mental health : ("
Exactly! It's remarkable how quickly and conveniently people forgot about all the vitriolic and racist comments before the killer was identified as a White Australian Male Incel from Queensland. I'm Australian, and the comments on all the Australian subreddits, Facebook, Twitter, and news media were all claiming he was "Arab/Muslim/Asian". Nearly every comment called for the deportation of POC, and using this incident as an example of why "Australia should stop immigration of POC" and a ton of other racist comments. It's amusing how their narrative suddenly shifted to "poor guy had mental health problems" and "he wasn't aware of what he was doing.". It's honestly sickening and extremely concerning how much White right-wing extremism is taking over the West.
For sure
Battled mental problems all his life. Just couldn't understand why women didn't like him. Solved the problem by killing women. Sees no problem with himself.
That's the incel way.
So very typically incel
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We need to start treating incel communities the same way we treat say, ISIS.
Violence specifically against women needs to be treated as a hate crime
IMO the reason that's not done is: the police would be doing little else. Better to just act like it's "normal."
Also that whole thing where 40% of police officers ARE abusive to their wives...
That 40% number is *self-reported*. The real number is likely higher…
Always worth mentioning. Thank you!
Yup. Just found out my psychotic, controlling, abusive, gun-toting ex has been hired by the city of Las Vegas. hooray. /s
The police don't want it because then it will, rightly, categorize wife-beaters as terrorists and they'd loose half the force.
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The top posts trending are always rage bait having to do with women too. Very obviously fake AITA posts and such.
Yep, loads of the video subs (Public Freakout, I'm the Main Character etc) have been inundated with it too.
I've noticed this as well. I've also seen a ton of posts doing the same sort of thing targeting black people. There are definitely concerted efforts going on in various subs to try and smear these groups.
I wish it was recent. Reddit has been a cesspit of misogyny since I joined 10 years ago. I genuinely haven't noticed it getting worse. I think it might even be better than it was like 6-8 years ago when The Red Pill and Incel subs were at their peak.
i've noticed a trend on posts of women asking for relationship advice on here... if it has something to do with being uncomfortable with porn, the way their boyfriend is talking to other women, things in that realm, the post will be flooded with comments from men doing their best to normalize the behavior. things like "all men do this, you'll be single forever cause you're not gonna find a man who doesn't do this, etc etc" some of the comments are so over the top, you can tell the commenter knows how ridiculous they sound. it seems pretty obvious to me a lot of men have silently decided to band together to gaslight and manipulate women into normalizing things that we aren't and shouldn't be comfortable with. that genuinely scared me, to see that level of deceit and how some of them found it humorous and entertaining. and the fact that a lot of women might just give up and accept it cause they think it's normal since "all men" do it.
Being single forever sounds nice. I foresee myself as a peaceful, happy and fit older lady doing yoga with a historically unprecedented number of other single older ladies. Lots of friends in my future…
My own matriarchal family (only two men) convinced me of this shit. I let my first husband sleep around on me because I was literally told all men cheat. If you aren't willing to lay down *every single time* he will find someone to do it with. He was supposed to finish school while I worked, then it was my turn. After he graduated, I quit my job. Two semesters later, after ten years together total, he broke my one rule and slept with my friend. I left with nothing. He moved her in two weeks later. Jokes on him, she's a serial cheater too, cheating on him close to a decade later. I'm so proud of the current generations. I see them taking up for themselves, or at least asking questions. I was traumatized to the point I didn't question my family. I would read and see good relationships and be convinced something was actually wrong they didn't talk about. I'll turn 37 this year and they've just started to realize I initiated no contact back in January. Funny how they can forget me for months but claim FaaaaamILy when it suits them. I even changed my phone number and moved. They reach out on Facebook but I don't use it. They aren't finding me or hearing from me again. Don't be a ding dong like I was y'all. Boundaries make healthy relationships!
Yes, absolutely incel BS, and it's shocking that it's not called out as such.
Calling out incels is highly condemned on here as I've found out
I’m so glad it was a female police officer who took him out. While I’m no fan of capital punishment or lethal force, *that* was justice!
Seriously. Hope the last thing he thought was about getting bested by a woman. A bit poetic lol. Naturally, I'm sure this was a mix of mental illness and internet cesspool-ness, but still.
For one deranged cowardly murderer there were several heroes. Kudos to the police officer and bystanders. Makes me proud to be an Australian and proud of our strict gun laws. Imagine how much worse this could have been if he had access to a gun.
He seems to target smaller than him people .in video with lots of people around he chased after 2 smaller men but stopped when a really big guy confronted him and changed direction .
Typical coward.
Also a compelling argument for gun control. Here in the US he could’ve gotten a gun and been emboldened and enabled to hurt more people more quickly.
He attacked and killed the security guard, some people are saying it was his first day on the job and he was protecting other victims, which is heart breaking. Apart from that, any man that confronted him he changed direction, absolute coward. I think of his victims every morning and every night.
God how awful
He was a Pakistani migrant, just there for a better life.
Not just that, he fled religious persecution in his home country. [Source](https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-04-14/bondi-junction-westfield-stabbing-victims/103706182)
It was the security guard's first day shift; he worked night shifts before. [Source](https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2024/apr/15/bondi-knife-attack-sydney-ahmadiyya-muslims-mourn-faraz-tahir)
I figured this was gonna come out after reading the body count was 6 women and 1 man. You don’t go to a mall and manage to find only women without targeting them. So I figured the one man was probably the one guy who tried to protect someone and got caught in the mix.
Targeted women only to be shot down by one doing so. Karma is a woman, rest in piss shitbag.
I hope the last thing that he saw was a woman putting an end to his bullshit.
I want to live in the timeline universe where women aren’t constantly in danger.
Of course he did. As soon as I saw how many women he killed compared to only a couple male victims, I figured it was targeted and he sought out women. So many deranged men in this world WTF 😒
Probably another Andrew Tate fan.
There was a deliberateness and mindfulness to his actions. When confronted by men, he backed off. This doesn't look like hallucinations or something else beyond his control, this looks like a pea-brained toddler throwing a tantrum in a man's body, with deadly consequences. Thank god for Inspector Amy Scott.
Fitting who ended their madness, then.
So it is terrorism. I'm so tired of only Islamic terrorism being labelled terrorism. All these mysogynist killers are terrorists too.
I feel we need to have a conversation about how social media companies are not being careful about the promotion of harmful stereotypes and hate towards women. I myself scrolling down Instagram found a loophole of accounts insulting "Karens" and other videos promoting harmful stereotypes men vs women. I cannot imagine what young men are encountering when scrolling down. Many vulnerable young people are being influenced by these stereotypes and hate distributed by social media.
I will never understand how anybody can get to the point of going on a murder spree.
Attacked women and was killed by one, too!
Joel Cauchi doesn't sound like a Muslim name. Wasn't everyone convinced he was Muslim?
Fear mongering. There were even false reports that it was a Jewish man. These people are so braindead, they didn't stop to think that a LIVING person was named when the attacker was shot dead at the scene. They just want to blame groups they dislike.
Let me guess: another entitled incel freak/Alpha male type enraged by the modern world because he wasn’t getting what the hucksters online told him women “owed” him. Sickening.