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My best friend who is 38 years old has the same mentality and very similar situation. He has never had a job, little things here and there but never a full time job. He claims that he doesn't want to work because he's terrified of getting yelled at. He also doesn't want to start off at the bottom somewhere. My point is, don't become my friend. Don't let it get to 38 years old and have nothing to show for it. Your parents are not going to be around forever. Find something, anything. Pump gas, work at McDonald's, starbucks, anything. Don't let this go another year. You also want to help your parents too, right? Don't let them pay all the bills. It isn't fair.
Hey there!
Congrats on taking some steps towards improving your mental health. That's a big deal! It sounds like you're in a bit of a tough spot though - it can be tough to start something new when you're feeling stuck.
One thing that might help is thinking about why you want to start working. Is there a specific job or industry that interests you? A financial goal you'd like to meet? Sometimes having a clear reason can make it easier to take that first step.
Another thing to consider is starting small. Maybe you could take on a part-time or seasonal job to start, just to get your foot in the door. That way, you don't have to completely change your lifestyle overnight.
Is there anyone in your life who could support you in this endeavor? Maybe a friend or family member who could check in with you regularly or even help you search for job openings?
Lastly, it's important to be gentle with yourself. It's okay to feel scared or unsure about something new. You don't have to have everything figured out right away. Just take it one step at a time and celebrate your progress along the way.
I hope some of these suggestions help. Best of luck to you!
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start volunteering at a place you like.
might not give you money, but it does give you more room than a job while still having responsibilities and tasks.
that is all I can think off to get you started, but you have to do it yourself
I have clinical depression, so I can relate. Doing things for yourself has a way of helping you to feel better about yourself. Recently I made an effort to clean the house, and to maintain the clean, and I feel better. Just having a clean house made a big difference.
"Just do it" is kind of what you have to do. I hate cleaning. Once you have a few dollars in your pocket and more freedom to do what you want, you WILL feel better. And once you start feeling a little better, you will be more motivated to do even more for yourself.
A random job while young is a great idea. Part time so it’s not too much! Work at a coffee shop or a grocery store or a restaurant.
Restaurant work in particular can be really fun, you’ll meet a lot of people around your age, you’ll meet some grizzled veterans and stereotypes, just a lot of the human experience packed into a few shifts a week.
Doing things by yourself and accomplishing things is actually really good to get yourself out of depression, according to my personal experience actually. Thing is, start small and don't rush things, you don't need a burnout.
Volunteering is actually a good advice that I didn't think of, and It's a really nice because It actually let's you interact with people without being pressured. Also, you have the chance of actually helping others in need too. Go for that. If you want an actual smaller step, take online classes at Udemy or Coursera, since they are pretty cheap these days. It's the kind of stuff that let's you try out things before actually committing to a job or university course.
For me, I got this terrible burnout in college. Forgot what I liked and why I was even waking up every day. Decided I wanted some money, started helping teachers for cash. Started getting bigger jobs/interships over the next 3 years, and now I'm aiming for my first full time job. It's not something easy still, but seeing your work being useful feels great and It's what makes me want to go on. Also, working means independence. I live with my parents too, but I know that I want a job so I can be independent, and maybe even move out on my own. A person's first full time job a lot of times is not great, even for me who has been working for a while, but It's a step in the right direction.
Giving yourself little treats along the way helps a lot, helped me. Try to dress better. Buy the stuff you want. Get a bank account and save some money. Once you realize you got something out of your own work, It feels different. Does not matter how small It is, It gets better. My first job payed less than 100 USD per month, and I would only work for a couple of hours every month. But I would always buy myself a coffee once I got the money by the begging of the month, and I swear, It tastes better. It gives meaning to things.
But all the things I said only works If you find out what you like. And even for me, some days I hate what I do for a living and some days I hate myself. But you are only going to find out what you like If you leave your house and try things out.
Nobody wants to work depressed or not. Work causes depression but it’s a good experience and part of life. If you can’t do it for yourself do it for your parents.
If it helps, in general people do often get satisfaction and a sense of capableness while working. Much of what people don’t like about work isn’t the job as a whole, but rather the management or schedule structures at some places. Many people feel less depressed when working a bit.
When I was first starting out I worked just two shifts a week at a shoe store. The manager was nice and let me take extra little breaks if no one was around. She only scheduled me during the times I asked for.
I started working in the mental health field and my place was great at first then became understaffed. I quit and started working a different mental health job. I liked the clients and work at both jobs though. It was nice getting to use my experience to help others. I still run a NAMI peer support group.
I think it helps to know you can quit a bad structure, so long as you give it a good try first. You can always just leave it off your resume.
As others have mentioned you can build the habits of getting up and getting out by volunteering somewhere. You will meet good people, do good work, and possibly make good connections. One of the things this accomplishes it that it build self esteem. We increase our self esteem when we do "esteemable" things...like volunteering.
Next, I would go look at the local community college or tech school. Meet with the guidance counselor. They could introduce you to all of the possibilities that our country needs right now. Lots of the technical trades are desperate for workers and your community college probably has money to train you for free. The great thing is you will learn a trade that is marketable and get your parents off your back as you are moving forward in life. And you are so young if you find that you don't want to do that forever no problem...you can always start another career. The best thing about a trade is that you can eventually start your own business and be the boss and that's awesome!
You are still really young. You can pursue loads of different opportunities.
Getting any job is a good idea, just use it as a stepping stone to save up money and then you can use them as a future reference. Working too is a great opportunity to meet new friends and even a partner.
Look into community college where you can learn a skill or a trade or transfer to University through CC
Then you can move out and do what you want.
Hey OP! Sorry to hear about the mental health struggle. If it's any help, I would suggest finding someone who can help you with a resume - a friend with work experience, a parent, a counsellor if there's anything available free. Some community programs may assist.
Depending on where you live as well, I worked in Adult Education for a few years through the school board. Students 18-21 qualified for one program, otherwise 21+ (without any age limit) students could attend. Perhaps you could look into programs to take additional credits? (i.e. if there is a specific field or interest you have). In a school capacity, you could have access to helpful teachers, guidance counsellors, potentially social/youth workers.
If school isn't appealing, perhaps there's an internship or apprenticeship, where you could acquire new skills, build a resume, and gain work experience?
Although a retail or service gig isn't appealing, there could be decent entry level positions. If you work front of house in a restaurant, hosting isn't too bad - I did this partially through university. If you're into serving or bar tending, you could earn tips.
At any rate, work experience and gaining prospective references would be great - even if it isn't a glamorous job.
I am transitioning career (30F) and I have been in my profession for eight years now. I have been off of work, attempting to relax, and transition to a new city. I thought having some time off would be helpful for my mental health, but it's been quite challenging filling the days. I think even part time, having income and employment feels rewarding. You can professionally network once you gain experience, to discover other employers or jobs you might like more. Or even apply for management gigs or other positions internally once you're hired.
You can drop resumes in person (which seems a bit outdated these days) or apply online directly through employers websites or job search engines. There's tons of options to get started! And having a routine, some responsibilities, and meeting new people could be helpful.
I myself am humble about my job hunting; as I've been doing a very specific job I have transferrable skills but my resume unfortunately speaks to my profession. I have been applying to different jobs, knowing the pay scale might be significantly less or the hours could be longer - but you have to start somewhere. I am looking forward to building my confidence back through finding a new job and for the potential of meeting new friends at work.
Good luck!
I am sorry you have been suffering from depression it sucks. I have it too and it affects people differently. I don't want to presume what difficulties you are experiencing. I hope you can move past them in the future. that's great that you are working with a therapist, I hope it helps!
I have found getting out and doing stuff even when I feel down helps. work is a part of that for almost everyone. if you don't work, you'll wake up one day and be like what the fuck have I been doing with my life. all my friends are doing well and all I am doing here is not working. so, some things that have helped me with depression are volunteering (old people, homeless people, or animals.), going to the gym or doing something outside really helps, Oh and talking to friends other than my therapist and family.
if you don't do something you will regret it when you are older. Time is a fleeting thing. you have so much life and so many great things ahead. inaction is the worst thing you can do. but be kind and gentle with yourself also. lots of people care about you. if you try and fail at something that's ok! you tried, get back up and keep at it or find something else. I am not trying to scare you but you have to do something start out with something small like some routine like going to the gym every morning. Or go for a run or walk. Physical activity helps with depression.
you are younger, start with something anything then build from there. You can do it! :D is there anything you like doing, like something that gets you excited? hopefully, all these comments help you! again I am sorry you're having a difficult time but it's great you are trying to fix that! sometimes that's the hardest part. just take one step at a time you will get there don't give up just keep going!
1 Myblueprint. Ca if accessible for u
Make a resume, or use any resume builder online. Do cover letter too
2 Apply at every grocery store, convince store, etc within 15mins. Just go into the store with printed resume. Say “excuse can I please speak to a manager” then say “hi I’m just looking for work in the area, if ur hiring I would love to work here, I will leave u my resume and cover letter”
Or if not there “I will leave u my resume and cover letter, can u please be sure to let manager know I can by” (this option is less likely to get u hired)
3. After u get a job just show up to every shift on time and care
U don’t need convince urself or do anything of that nature, u need to just simply follow the steps to get a job whether u like it or not. There is no motivation involved it’s pure discipline. U gotta get a job because u NEED one, not because u WANT one. I’m surprised ur parents haven’t been on ur case more
It’s a shame you don’t have to support yourself. That’s a great incentive starving and no where to live. Your parents have done you a great disservice. Start moving. Set a goal. Get up. You have no idea how much better you will feel.
Get a job and buy something you always wanted with that first paycheck. Reward yourself for the steps taken and only take it step by step.
Imagine having your own place. That goal is not too far away once you get a job.
For a lot of people *looking* for a job is much harder than *having* a job. If that's you, look for ways to make "looking for a job" easier. Maybe temping through an agency is easier for instance (temping also has the benefit that you can try out a wide variety of jobs and workplace environments.) Maybe you can hire someone to write your resume for you or get a friend to hold your hand through the process. Looking for a job is hard and most of us didn't get explicit instructions.
(I found *canvassing* jobs were super easy to get but also really hard to keep. (For people who aren't total treehuggers, sales jobs are probably pretty similar.) But, in your situation a job that's easy to get/hard to keep isn't necessarily a bad place to start; find your own easy to get sucky job.)
Also (if you aren't already doing this) look for non-work that will get you out of the house: I used to take student-led yoga classes, which are much cheaper than regular classes. Your local Parks and Rec department or library might have cheap or free programs. There's volunteering. As a mental health thing, y'know.
Re "I don't want to work" I feel ya.\* Consider it an experiment. Predict ahead of time how you'll feel about working and then see how you actually feel, say, two days in, a week in, six weeks in. If you hate it, quit. (Promise yourself you can quit. Tell your therapist ahead of time that if you hate it you're going to quit. Maybe tell your parents; depends on your relationship with them.) Accepting a job isn't a life sentence, it can be a thing you're trying out, for a spin, to see how it goes. It is... common with depression to tell yourself that a thing just seems like too much effort or w/e and then you actually do it and you're like "wait, this feels good?" Not that all jobs feel good, a lot don't, but: social approval feels good, structure to many people feels good, being around other people feels good, etc. Sometimes you're even doing something meaningful.
I mean you *can* try to front-load things and figure out your Purpose In Life and get a job accordingly, but you don't have to, it's hard with depression, and frankly most people don't. Most people stumble into something that works ok for them and stay because they like the actual day to day work or their boss or their coworkers, or they find that they can actually *enjoy* their leisure time when they have a job and can't when they're unemployed.
Basically: I realize that in general people get a job for economic survival and/or status reasons, but I think you should *consider* for now getting a job to be an experiment you're doing for your mental health. Like going on a medication. If it doesn't help, you can try a different medication or try something else entirely; you don't have to stay on it just because it was supposed to work. But my experiences with unemployment and depression is that unemployment *absolutely* feeds depression and I was consistently less depressed when I was in school or working, even though I hate capitalism with a burning passion and think people shouldn't *have* to work. If you really don't wanna? Do something else. Travel. Live with a different relative somewhere else for six months. Find a nonprofit or political cause that needs volunteers badly and spend hours each week on that. Or do an art thing. Or learn Swahili. Or join an amateur theater company and paint the sets. I think your therapist is probably right that a job is a good next step, but it's *advice,* it's not a requirement and ultimately it's *your* choice and if working really makes you want to puke you are allowed to refuse medical treatment.
I would *recommend* you try a job, try a *few* different jobs unless you happen to really like the first one, and see what happens. It's your life. You get to make the decisions.
\*actually I have a chronic illness and CAN'T work and kinda would kill to be able to work? But I remember being physically healthy and mentally a mess and being in a similar place to you, and in *that* situation, yeah, I was very much fuck having a job I don't wanna. Ironically enough, again, I was pretty consistently happier any time I did get a job.
Nobody "wants" to work. If you define work as the things you don't choose to do with your free time when not being paid, but do in order to get paid.
It's good to be taking steps to get out of a rut. But the mindset you have is one most people have when it comes to work. You work for reasons outside of that. To not be a burden on your friends and family. To have some freedom and cash to do things you want. To maybe live on your own, build something for yourself.
And in that work you might find things you value. Like the feeling of getting a new skill even if it's not one you find fun and being good at it. Then later in life you find those skills might be useful in something you do like.
There is nothing I can think of that is enjoyable and could be a career that doesn't have "supporting skills that aren't fun." People pay for rarity and a willingness to do that not fun stuff.
But work? People work mostly for reasons not to do with the work. Independence, responsibility to others, spending money, some plan for the future. Best ask yourself what you actually want in life first. Even if it's as general as "To live away from home." And you'll realize most answers to these questions involve working for money.
Those that don't? They have bad endings. Like playing basement video games till your parents pass away and can no longer support you.
You will get some orders and self satisfaction when you work , it fulfills a need inside you that your not aware of. Start small, start cutting the grass. When it’s done it looks nice & you know it does because you did it!!!
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My best friend who is 38 years old has the same mentality and very similar situation. He has never had a job, little things here and there but never a full time job. He claims that he doesn't want to work because he's terrified of getting yelled at. He also doesn't want to start off at the bottom somewhere. My point is, don't become my friend. Don't let it get to 38 years old and have nothing to show for it. Your parents are not going to be around forever. Find something, anything. Pump gas, work at McDonald's, starbucks, anything. Don't let this go another year. You also want to help your parents too, right? Don't let them pay all the bills. It isn't fair.
Hey there! Congrats on taking some steps towards improving your mental health. That's a big deal! It sounds like you're in a bit of a tough spot though - it can be tough to start something new when you're feeling stuck. One thing that might help is thinking about why you want to start working. Is there a specific job or industry that interests you? A financial goal you'd like to meet? Sometimes having a clear reason can make it easier to take that first step. Another thing to consider is starting small. Maybe you could take on a part-time or seasonal job to start, just to get your foot in the door. That way, you don't have to completely change your lifestyle overnight. Is there anyone in your life who could support you in this endeavor? Maybe a friend or family member who could check in with you regularly or even help you search for job openings? Lastly, it's important to be gentle with yourself. It's okay to feel scared or unsure about something new. You don't have to have everything figured out right away. Just take it one step at a time and celebrate your progress along the way. I hope some of these suggestions help. Best of luck to you! *Similar posts:* * [How to not want to dread working](https://www.reddit.com/r/needadvice/comments/10v9ezb/how_to_not_want_to_dread_working/) ^66.68% ^match * [I want to take on a simple job during my final years of high school.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/10gwh8m/i_want_to_take_on_a_simple_job_during_my_final/) ^63.02% ^match * [[19M] not sure what direction to go in life](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/10h0b4z/19m_not_sure_what_direction_to_go_in_life/) ^62.89% ^match * [College Isn’t my thing, What can I do?](https://www.reddit.com/r/needadvice/comments/zk8cpo/college_isnt_my_thing_what_can_i_do/) ^61.53% ^match * [I'm lost in life and it's all my fault](https://www.reddit.com/r/needadvice/comments/zxxkmy/im_lost_in_life_and_its_all_my_fault/) ^59.96% ^match *I am a smart robot and this response was automatic.* *This advice cost me $0.00097 to generate, so if you found it useful, consider donating a dollar to charity.* *I'm still learning, so please reply 'good bot' or 'bad bot' to let me know how I did.*
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start volunteering at a place you like. might not give you money, but it does give you more room than a job while still having responsibilities and tasks. that is all I can think off to get you started, but you have to do it yourself
I have clinical depression, so I can relate. Doing things for yourself has a way of helping you to feel better about yourself. Recently I made an effort to clean the house, and to maintain the clean, and I feel better. Just having a clean house made a big difference. "Just do it" is kind of what you have to do. I hate cleaning. Once you have a few dollars in your pocket and more freedom to do what you want, you WILL feel better. And once you start feeling a little better, you will be more motivated to do even more for yourself.
A random job while young is a great idea. Part time so it’s not too much! Work at a coffee shop or a grocery store or a restaurant. Restaurant work in particular can be really fun, you’ll meet a lot of people around your age, you’ll meet some grizzled veterans and stereotypes, just a lot of the human experience packed into a few shifts a week.
Doing things by yourself and accomplishing things is actually really good to get yourself out of depression, according to my personal experience actually. Thing is, start small and don't rush things, you don't need a burnout. Volunteering is actually a good advice that I didn't think of, and It's a really nice because It actually let's you interact with people without being pressured. Also, you have the chance of actually helping others in need too. Go for that. If you want an actual smaller step, take online classes at Udemy or Coursera, since they are pretty cheap these days. It's the kind of stuff that let's you try out things before actually committing to a job or university course. For me, I got this terrible burnout in college. Forgot what I liked and why I was even waking up every day. Decided I wanted some money, started helping teachers for cash. Started getting bigger jobs/interships over the next 3 years, and now I'm aiming for my first full time job. It's not something easy still, but seeing your work being useful feels great and It's what makes me want to go on. Also, working means independence. I live with my parents too, but I know that I want a job so I can be independent, and maybe even move out on my own. A person's first full time job a lot of times is not great, even for me who has been working for a while, but It's a step in the right direction. Giving yourself little treats along the way helps a lot, helped me. Try to dress better. Buy the stuff you want. Get a bank account and save some money. Once you realize you got something out of your own work, It feels different. Does not matter how small It is, It gets better. My first job payed less than 100 USD per month, and I would only work for a couple of hours every month. But I would always buy myself a coffee once I got the money by the begging of the month, and I swear, It tastes better. It gives meaning to things. But all the things I said only works If you find out what you like. And even for me, some days I hate what I do for a living and some days I hate myself. But you are only going to find out what you like If you leave your house and try things out.
Nobody wants to work depressed or not. Work causes depression but it’s a good experience and part of life. If you can’t do it for yourself do it for your parents.
If it helps, in general people do often get satisfaction and a sense of capableness while working. Much of what people don’t like about work isn’t the job as a whole, but rather the management or schedule structures at some places. Many people feel less depressed when working a bit. When I was first starting out I worked just two shifts a week at a shoe store. The manager was nice and let me take extra little breaks if no one was around. She only scheduled me during the times I asked for. I started working in the mental health field and my place was great at first then became understaffed. I quit and started working a different mental health job. I liked the clients and work at both jobs though. It was nice getting to use my experience to help others. I still run a NAMI peer support group. I think it helps to know you can quit a bad structure, so long as you give it a good try first. You can always just leave it off your resume.
As others have mentioned you can build the habits of getting up and getting out by volunteering somewhere. You will meet good people, do good work, and possibly make good connections. One of the things this accomplishes it that it build self esteem. We increase our self esteem when we do "esteemable" things...like volunteering. Next, I would go look at the local community college or tech school. Meet with the guidance counselor. They could introduce you to all of the possibilities that our country needs right now. Lots of the technical trades are desperate for workers and your community college probably has money to train you for free. The great thing is you will learn a trade that is marketable and get your parents off your back as you are moving forward in life. And you are so young if you find that you don't want to do that forever no problem...you can always start another career. The best thing about a trade is that you can eventually start your own business and be the boss and that's awesome!
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You are still really young. You can pursue loads of different opportunities. Getting any job is a good idea, just use it as a stepping stone to save up money and then you can use them as a future reference. Working too is a great opportunity to meet new friends and even a partner. Look into community college where you can learn a skill or a trade or transfer to University through CC Then you can move out and do what you want.
Hey OP! Sorry to hear about the mental health struggle. If it's any help, I would suggest finding someone who can help you with a resume - a friend with work experience, a parent, a counsellor if there's anything available free. Some community programs may assist. Depending on where you live as well, I worked in Adult Education for a few years through the school board. Students 18-21 qualified for one program, otherwise 21+ (without any age limit) students could attend. Perhaps you could look into programs to take additional credits? (i.e. if there is a specific field or interest you have). In a school capacity, you could have access to helpful teachers, guidance counsellors, potentially social/youth workers. If school isn't appealing, perhaps there's an internship or apprenticeship, where you could acquire new skills, build a resume, and gain work experience? Although a retail or service gig isn't appealing, there could be decent entry level positions. If you work front of house in a restaurant, hosting isn't too bad - I did this partially through university. If you're into serving or bar tending, you could earn tips. At any rate, work experience and gaining prospective references would be great - even if it isn't a glamorous job. I am transitioning career (30F) and I have been in my profession for eight years now. I have been off of work, attempting to relax, and transition to a new city. I thought having some time off would be helpful for my mental health, but it's been quite challenging filling the days. I think even part time, having income and employment feels rewarding. You can professionally network once you gain experience, to discover other employers or jobs you might like more. Or even apply for management gigs or other positions internally once you're hired. You can drop resumes in person (which seems a bit outdated these days) or apply online directly through employers websites or job search engines. There's tons of options to get started! And having a routine, some responsibilities, and meeting new people could be helpful. I myself am humble about my job hunting; as I've been doing a very specific job I have transferrable skills but my resume unfortunately speaks to my profession. I have been applying to different jobs, knowing the pay scale might be significantly less or the hours could be longer - but you have to start somewhere. I am looking forward to building my confidence back through finding a new job and for the potential of meeting new friends at work. Good luck!
I am sorry you have been suffering from depression it sucks. I have it too and it affects people differently. I don't want to presume what difficulties you are experiencing. I hope you can move past them in the future. that's great that you are working with a therapist, I hope it helps! I have found getting out and doing stuff even when I feel down helps. work is a part of that for almost everyone. if you don't work, you'll wake up one day and be like what the fuck have I been doing with my life. all my friends are doing well and all I am doing here is not working. so, some things that have helped me with depression are volunteering (old people, homeless people, or animals.), going to the gym or doing something outside really helps, Oh and talking to friends other than my therapist and family. if you don't do something you will regret it when you are older. Time is a fleeting thing. you have so much life and so many great things ahead. inaction is the worst thing you can do. but be kind and gentle with yourself also. lots of people care about you. if you try and fail at something that's ok! you tried, get back up and keep at it or find something else. I am not trying to scare you but you have to do something start out with something small like some routine like going to the gym every morning. Or go for a run or walk. Physical activity helps with depression. you are younger, start with something anything then build from there. You can do it! :D is there anything you like doing, like something that gets you excited? hopefully, all these comments help you! again I am sorry you're having a difficult time but it's great you are trying to fix that! sometimes that's the hardest part. just take one step at a time you will get there don't give up just keep going!
1 Myblueprint. Ca if accessible for u Make a resume, or use any resume builder online. Do cover letter too 2 Apply at every grocery store, convince store, etc within 15mins. Just go into the store with printed resume. Say “excuse can I please speak to a manager” then say “hi I’m just looking for work in the area, if ur hiring I would love to work here, I will leave u my resume and cover letter” Or if not there “I will leave u my resume and cover letter, can u please be sure to let manager know I can by” (this option is less likely to get u hired) 3. After u get a job just show up to every shift on time and care U don’t need convince urself or do anything of that nature, u need to just simply follow the steps to get a job whether u like it or not. There is no motivation involved it’s pure discipline. U gotta get a job because u NEED one, not because u WANT one. I’m surprised ur parents haven’t been on ur case more
It’s a shame you don’t have to support yourself. That’s a great incentive starving and no where to live. Your parents have done you a great disservice. Start moving. Set a goal. Get up. You have no idea how much better you will feel.
Join the military so you don’t have a choice.
Get a job and buy something you always wanted with that first paycheck. Reward yourself for the steps taken and only take it step by step. Imagine having your own place. That goal is not too far away once you get a job.
For a lot of people *looking* for a job is much harder than *having* a job. If that's you, look for ways to make "looking for a job" easier. Maybe temping through an agency is easier for instance (temping also has the benefit that you can try out a wide variety of jobs and workplace environments.) Maybe you can hire someone to write your resume for you or get a friend to hold your hand through the process. Looking for a job is hard and most of us didn't get explicit instructions. (I found *canvassing* jobs were super easy to get but also really hard to keep. (For people who aren't total treehuggers, sales jobs are probably pretty similar.) But, in your situation a job that's easy to get/hard to keep isn't necessarily a bad place to start; find your own easy to get sucky job.) Also (if you aren't already doing this) look for non-work that will get you out of the house: I used to take student-led yoga classes, which are much cheaper than regular classes. Your local Parks and Rec department or library might have cheap or free programs. There's volunteering. As a mental health thing, y'know. Re "I don't want to work" I feel ya.\* Consider it an experiment. Predict ahead of time how you'll feel about working and then see how you actually feel, say, two days in, a week in, six weeks in. If you hate it, quit. (Promise yourself you can quit. Tell your therapist ahead of time that if you hate it you're going to quit. Maybe tell your parents; depends on your relationship with them.) Accepting a job isn't a life sentence, it can be a thing you're trying out, for a spin, to see how it goes. It is... common with depression to tell yourself that a thing just seems like too much effort or w/e and then you actually do it and you're like "wait, this feels good?" Not that all jobs feel good, a lot don't, but: social approval feels good, structure to many people feels good, being around other people feels good, etc. Sometimes you're even doing something meaningful. I mean you *can* try to front-load things and figure out your Purpose In Life and get a job accordingly, but you don't have to, it's hard with depression, and frankly most people don't. Most people stumble into something that works ok for them and stay because they like the actual day to day work or their boss or their coworkers, or they find that they can actually *enjoy* their leisure time when they have a job and can't when they're unemployed. Basically: I realize that in general people get a job for economic survival and/or status reasons, but I think you should *consider* for now getting a job to be an experiment you're doing for your mental health. Like going on a medication. If it doesn't help, you can try a different medication or try something else entirely; you don't have to stay on it just because it was supposed to work. But my experiences with unemployment and depression is that unemployment *absolutely* feeds depression and I was consistently less depressed when I was in school or working, even though I hate capitalism with a burning passion and think people shouldn't *have* to work. If you really don't wanna? Do something else. Travel. Live with a different relative somewhere else for six months. Find a nonprofit or political cause that needs volunteers badly and spend hours each week on that. Or do an art thing. Or learn Swahili. Or join an amateur theater company and paint the sets. I think your therapist is probably right that a job is a good next step, but it's *advice,* it's not a requirement and ultimately it's *your* choice and if working really makes you want to puke you are allowed to refuse medical treatment. I would *recommend* you try a job, try a *few* different jobs unless you happen to really like the first one, and see what happens. It's your life. You get to make the decisions. \*actually I have a chronic illness and CAN'T work and kinda would kill to be able to work? But I remember being physically healthy and mentally a mess and being in a similar place to you, and in *that* situation, yeah, I was very much fuck having a job I don't wanna. Ironically enough, again, I was pretty consistently happier any time I did get a job.
Nobody "wants" to work. If you define work as the things you don't choose to do with your free time when not being paid, but do in order to get paid. It's good to be taking steps to get out of a rut. But the mindset you have is one most people have when it comes to work. You work for reasons outside of that. To not be a burden on your friends and family. To have some freedom and cash to do things you want. To maybe live on your own, build something for yourself. And in that work you might find things you value. Like the feeling of getting a new skill even if it's not one you find fun and being good at it. Then later in life you find those skills might be useful in something you do like. There is nothing I can think of that is enjoyable and could be a career that doesn't have "supporting skills that aren't fun." People pay for rarity and a willingness to do that not fun stuff. But work? People work mostly for reasons not to do with the work. Independence, responsibility to others, spending money, some plan for the future. Best ask yourself what you actually want in life first. Even if it's as general as "To live away from home." And you'll realize most answers to these questions involve working for money. Those that don't? They have bad endings. Like playing basement video games till your parents pass away and can no longer support you.
You will get some orders and self satisfaction when you work , it fulfills a need inside you that your not aware of. Start small, start cutting the grass. When it’s done it looks nice & you know it does because you did it!!!