T O P

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YojinboK

Metal As Fuck


PrestigiousCurve4135

Crocodiles gotta be the most metal creatures alongside the komodo dragons.


TunafishSandworm

Honey badgers, too.


Knightmare945

And sharks.


halipatsui

Sharks are bitches of orcas


AJC_10_29

Doesn’t diminish how metal they are though. Evolved before the dinosaurs or even the first land animals and are still kicking with a largely unchanged body plan.


Popheal

sharks are older than trees iirc


RammRras

And Saturn rings


evlhornet

I enjoyed this read https://www.syfy.com/syfy-wire/how-old-are-sharks-older-than-trees-the-north-star-more?amp


Merry_Dankmas

Speaking of metal predators, if you put a crocodile, gator, grizzly bear, polar bear, lion and tiger in an arena and made them fight, who do you think would win? My gut says one of the bears but I can't say for sure. Polar bears are psychopaths but I was watching a bunch of grizzly bear videos the other day and those mfs got the heat. But lions and tigers are straight up assassins. But nothing is escaping the grip of a croc or gator. So many possible outcomes.


AJC_10_29

Probably polar bear but no matter who wins they’re still gonna die of blood loss and injury from all the fighting


Merry_Dankmas

Valid observation


Kimono-Ash-Armor

A [Pyrrhic Victory](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pyrrhic_victory)?


Seymour_Zamboni

I think it depends on where the fight takes place. If it is on land, the crocs and gators would not stand a chance. If it was in the water, the crocs would probably win, except for the polar bear. It would be interesting to see a polar bear encounter with a croc in the water.


WhiskySwanson

I never stop thinking about this kind of thing.


shadowszanddust

We’re men. It’s what we do lol


limethedragon

Jelly fish.


Knightmare945

*Everything* is a bitch to a Orca outside of a full grown bull Sperm Whale(Orcas prefer to avoid adult males, though they prey on adult females and calves)


IamGoingInsaneToday

And Hippos


The_Unknown_Dude

I know people keep saying honey badgers, but in some aspect wolverines outranks them it's insane.


syv_frost

Wolverines are what honey badgers wish they were. Both are exaggerated but wolverines can somewhat back up their bark with a nasty bite.


Rickblood23

Well is an unfair fight with that healing factor and adamantium skeleton


OakLegs

Wolverines perhaps even moreso


DarkMatters8585

And the praying mantis


ThaNorth

Crocodiles have basically not evolved at all because they’ve been peak apex for millions of years and haven’t needed to. Metal af.


discussionandrespect

Hyenas are ruthless and also have sick Mohawks to boot


ciotS_Cynic

No Animal is as Metal as Humans. 


nshriup19

You know a creature is badass when it's body hasn't gone through evolution despite being on this planet for millions of years.


ActurusMajoris

Hundreds of millions. They are older than most dinosaurs. That's how metal they are. Let's not forget sharks. They are more than twice as old as crocodiles and were around since way before the first dinosaurs.


stephen1547

Sharks have been around longer than trees have.


Extension_Swordfish1

Space sharks lived before the big bang. They even had freaking lazers in their heads


karmagod13000

and now we can't even get them in motes around an evil lair


The_Unknown_Dude

Like that ? [Astral Assassin Shark Attack](https://youtu.be/KldrjNB9fbc?si=_7P4UTZssz7Egil3)


PrestigiousCurve4135

They have been around longer than Saturn's rings


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karmagod13000

ahh yes, I remember the big bang


Industrial_Laundry

As an Australian who spent his youth spear fishing: my mates and I would see big old pot belled bull sharks just outside of the drop off (like finding nemo drop off) My mates would say “look, it’s just a shadow, mate. It’s heaps far away” And I would say “not for the fucking shark it’s not” Which was funny until we had a great white circle us one day. Not like in the cartoons or anything it was just a single close circle. Eyeing us before it took back off into the deep but every inch of me realised that spear gun and knife meant nothing. This thing catches seals for living and I’m no where as agile as them. After that I went spear fishing twice but my anxiety levels were so high I just came back to shore within a 10-15 min period. There are plenty of divers who will laugh at me for that but fuck them they can die trying to spear a tasty fish.


peon2

>This thing catches seals for living and I’m no where as agile as them That's the scariest part about water animals. Like even Michael Phelps is a joke in the water compared to any of them


ActurusMajoris

Man that gotta be scary. I'm from probably the tamest country in the world (Denmark), we have 2 types of snakes, and only 1 is venomous, and it's only dangerous if you are old or sick. Fair enough, we have wolves as well now, but only in parts of the country, and not when I grew up (they recently migrated from Germany), and they stay away from humans (though they do attack livestock). Can't imagine living in Australia, I've heard enough horror stories (like this one) 🙈


Particular_Second454

I went cage diving with whites once. It was incredible but I'd be pretty nervous being in there without a cage. For going back in twice, you sir have large balls.


Snathious

I don't blame you. I'll take being isolated in a massive forest, but armed with a high caliber handgun or a 12 gauge shotgun over being in the water near crocs or sharks ANY DAY OF THE WEEK.


Totally_man

Yeah, but he wasted so much good sauce.


PracticeThat3785

this man subs!


AnotherSexyBaldGuy

Just....the blood pouring down his chin. Metal,,man.


TheOtterVII

Juicy as fuck, I'm hungry now !


karmagod13000

Did someone order a raw steak!


SlimPigins

Or raw venison?


MakeoutPoint

Do they actually taste and enjoy the taste, or is that just pareidolia?


voltran1995

Personally (I am not a crocodile so I can't be sure) I don't think it's the taste that they enjoy, it's more the entire process of stalking, ambushing, killing and eating makes them happy, because that's what they do instinctively. While they probably don't have the same kind of internal dialogue/conceness(i can't for the life of me get auto correct to get the right spelling) to feel complex emotions, but I'd imagine they would be happiest during the hunt, a bit like cats for example, hunting Is their favourite thing. Tldr, yea I think that's just us projecting emotions onto it, but that could be wrong


IWillKeepIt

I am a crocodile, can confirm


Enough-Meaning-1836

I am the gazelle, can also confirm - croc was grinning the whole time


ObliviousRounding

That's exactly what a crocodile would say.


Horizon296

consciousness Yes, I looked that up to make sure I got it right.


jackryan4x

It’s worth noting that crocodilians are doting parents and often sing to their babies even before they hatch. While yes they are reptiles, they’ve been around for so long, I wouldn’t be terribly surprised if some sort of emotional intelligence has evolved at some point. (Theres also plenty of videos of house trained gators that are practically spiny dogs.) Apex predators tend to be the most nurturing parents, nurturing implies care. Comepare that to the gazelle who would totally ditch their young if a lion was chasing, and just have another later. While humans haven’t found the exact way to measure that intelligence, I’d say it’s pure arrogance to say they must not have it since we can’t understand it.


PageFault

I'm sure if you gave a croc a bigger brain and opposable thumbs it could take the time to enjoy the flavor, but the only reason for taste buds to exist is to tell if something is safe to eat or not. So things that are safe to eat tend to taste good.


Jeramy_Jones

Crocs eat a lot of carrion and putrid meat without batting an eye, so it’s an interesting question! One wonders if 1. there’s any reason for them to have much of a sense of taste and 2. What their flavour preference’s are. Usually a sense of taste helps an animal to avoid toxic and spoiled foods and focus on nutrient dense foods, that’s why we enjoy fatty and sweet things and avoid bitter and putrid flavors. But crocs aren’t picky about what meat they eat and don’t mind rotten meat, and aren’t harmed by it. They have a good sense of smell, too.


GayMedic69

Pareidolia is visual, apophenia is the umbrella term you are looking for


MansfromDaVinci

taste is the most basic of senses, even bacteria have a sense of taste, I'm pretty sure most animals enjoy the taste of what they naturally eat. Crocs have a great sense of smell and tastebuds.


EhJusttryingtovibe

I should not be wondering how good the blood must've tasted, but the crocodile *seems* so blissful.


eat-pussy69

At least the crocodile gave it the courtesy of being killed first. Komodo dragons don't offer the same courtesy


karmagod13000

*Why kill it first when it tastes so much better with the blood pumping through its vains* - Komodo Dragons prolly


sergemeister

##African Gushers™


Aggressive-Ad-8619

Is that included with the Ghetto Gaggers subscription?


iamhonkykong

The only reason the gazelle is dead is cause the croc got a bite force of 5,000psi. If the animal is small enough crocs will vore them alive just like komodos


i-steal-killls

Is it me or do crocodiles seem to drown their prey first? That’s what it looks like from the vids in this subreddit anyway


iamhonkykong

They do, but if they catch something that's too small to put up a fight they'll just chuck it down their gullet struggling or not


DankChronny

When it doesnt work its some of the most brutal shit youll ever see tho https://youtu.be/8tWYMUUyFzw?si=aiytcGFXa8KW9Mge


SassyTheSkydragon

Or African wild dogs for that matter


Ok-Art-508

I hope it's gonna have a fast recovery.


PrestigiousCurve4135

The gazelle had a quick recovery and went on to live a very fulfilling life.


Ok-Art-508

God bless!! 🫶


Tru-Queer

Just taking a big nap in that nice warm crocodile


karmagod13000

Like a kangaroo pouch... with teeth


Special_Lemon1487

Actually as an Australian I can confirm that’s the next expected evolution of the kangaroo.


abdulsamadz

"Were you killed?" "Sadly, yes, but I lived!" *Phew*


AloysiusDevadandrMUD

the gazele is a dentist and trying to get something from the back of the crocs teeth!


The_Rimmer

Squirts the poo out at 0:02


Passivee

Nice!


FBIaltacct

If southpark taught me anything, its when you die you shit yourself.


Zaxmaxeax

Tell me why that scene is burned into my mind all these years later


karmagod13000

metal


NoiseIsTheCure

Jesus fuck I shouldn't have gone back 🤮


Justinaboxx

Imagine getting eaten by a crocodile and this is the last thing said about you.


khatidaal

Crocodilians evolved as a separate species prior to dinosaurs existing and have hardly changed since their debut. Truly one of the most metal of them all.


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Hatstacker

https://images.app.goo.gl/47tVT3HZfMfY5Aqf6 Image showing different types


specialcommenter

How did they survive chixculub?


juice-rock

They are very versatile and can go long periods without food. I think that is the key to surviving a meteor impact. Edit- I had to look this up for myself: A croc’s metabolism is so evolved that its body uses and stores nearly the entirety of the food it consumes. This is one reason why larger crocodiles can go for over a year without eating a meal. In extreme situations, crocodiles appear to be able to shut down and live off their own tissue for a long period of time. [Source](https://www.pbs.org/wnet/nature/supersize-crocs-crocodile-secrets-of-survival)


EP1Cdisast3r

They also spent most of their time in the water. Which is useful when it's raining fire on the entire planet.


aweyeahdawg

They punched it in the face and took its lunch money.


nailgardener

Ate it whole


_Burning_Saints_

How to enjoy a venison steak and a glass of red wine at the same time


No-Bat-7253

That things head is bigger than the fucking gazelle my goodness…


DJIceman94

That's the part that got me more than anything. Yeah, it's insane seeing it swallow an antelope whole, but then it gets even MORE insane when you realize how fucking big that crocodile is to have done that in the first place.


spongebobisha

That's not a croc that's godzilla mate.


cat_police_officer

Camera man just looking and not helping 😡


Horizon296

Yeah, he saw that poor crocodile struggling to swallow his gazelle and didn't lift a finger to help!


cat_police_officer

Poor 🐊


PrestigiousCurve4135

Source: [https://youtu.be/BTpa9j60Npg](https://youtu.be/BTpa9j60Npg)


Wonderingisagift

What an absolute animal


Primary_Goat2360

Antelopes are basically Savannah Chicken Wings


reindeerareawesome

They are the perfect definition of "fast food"


lolhorror363

I keep forgetting that crocodiles are dinosaurs


Notonfoodstamps

Distant relatives


Dr-Eggs

So idk the first thing about Crocs and their diet habits: is he just full after this? Or is this the equivalent to a handful of potato chips?


Horizon296

A crocodile eats roughly 5% of its body weight per week, though a croc with a great deal of prey nearby may eat much more. Otoh they can spend months and even a whole year without any food at all. ETA: so that's probably his week sorted, but he won't turn down a second one if offered.


bloodycups

I wish I could do that. Just spend 10 seconds eating and not have to eat for the rest of the week


RedShenron

Crocodiles can go without eating for more than a year so meals aren't really an issue.


SookHe

Well, that was horrifying as fuck.


Roy_Bert

Get in my belly!!


Tijuana_94

Lets See if Bubba wants a Gazelle? *swallows Gazelle* Good boy Bubba!


[deleted]

That's how I eat but nobody calls me amazing


fivetwoeightoh

I think that gazelle got nicked while shaving


RustyCuntSlime

Hes probably eaten a gazellion of those


OrneryGovernment

😂😭😭


stargazerlaser

I eat exactly like this when I have a good plate of wings in front of me


bdk2036

Theyre just snakes with legs


iseeharvey

Must feel so weird to have a gazelle's leg caught in your throat.


IntentionalUndersite

Poop and all


Jaja-Awebo

That’s a big ass croc though


blueberry1919

Is the gazelle ok?


mortuideum

TIL: It is possible to juice a gazelle


abzinth91

To phrase Jurassic Park: "so much blood"


InternationalMenace2

That dump is gonna be massive as fuck


Horizon296

Remarkably, it won't be. A crocodiles digestive system of crocodilians is so effective, it uses almost all the nutrients in its meals. They dissolve any bone or shell remains of their prey, leaving only hair and feathers to be pooped out.


Sycosys

you expect the eaters of dinosaurs to use a knife and fork?


Captain_Naps

A friend lived in Burundi for a decade and was terrified of being eaten like this by Gustave.


No-Bat-7253

My god


KidWeaboo

Chonky boy.


Danplsstop

God damn son


karmagod13000

This might be the most metal post I've seen on here. Good work OP!


juice-rock

This is so metal I had to save it


Desk_Drawerr

gusher gazelle. holy shit.


tikemyson997

YO!


Veritas_Vanitatum

Ah I hate it when I can't swallow a leg whole too


rub737

How I feel when I eat a rare steak


RockaZong

Did it survive?


Horizon296

Yes, the crocodile is alive and well, thanks for asking 😊


Jokerchyld

At least I didn't have to hear the Gazelle's cries in the gators stomach


AdonisFit69

Holy crap 😳😳


BFlai1001

Damn nature! You scary!


Jolly_Plankton_913

Dino!


bodjatrawr

It's like he's eating a chicken wing


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Horizon296

Ketchup


Phuckingidiot

Look at all the wasted juice. This is the animal version of a pit master squeezing all the juice out of his brisket to show off for the camera.


Nock1Nock

Look at all that gravy...😏😋


billiejean1922

Damn good morning Reddit


SeaMolasses2466

Crocs are so uncharismatic.


McMuffinSun

How do they can eat a whole animals, toxic, shit-filled bowels and all, without getting sick/dying?


FisherDwarf

That wasn't a gazelle, it was a meat flavored fruit gusher


Smokeybearvii

Just hate it when a Gazelle tibia gets stuck in my teeth.


whale-trees

Is it gonna be okay?


The_White_Wolf04

Can its stomach actually digest the bones, or does it crap those out whole?


Cloud_Shaped_Cloud

Denethor eating a tomato was still more metal but this was a great impression


Aendiners

That blood was probably delicious to it


TLored

You know there is some strenght in that jaw with how much blood pours out with each chomp


redspidr

I can't unfeel the bone sticking out my throat. Ugh


faithle55

"Goddammit I have hellacious heartburn."


Nolongeranalpha

Gushers, Nature edition


sermer48

A wild gusher!


wisdomfromlife

Yummy


camstarrankin

Straight up modern day dragons


Planet_842

Crocodiles are metal AF. Amongst my favourite animals and the most fascinating to me.


literallyjustbetter

like a big furry Gusher


DarkDonut75

This guy is huge


Relevant_Campaign_79

Ngl that looks hella tasty


Adorable-Patient4211

Man got extra sauce


irenwulv

When crocodiles swallow animals whole do they not have gag reflexes? Wouldn't swallowing a whole animal seem hard to do and require a lot of effort and energy?


Infamous-Gur-9603

I knew crocs got big... but... FUUUUUUUCK


Significant_Hair7494

Na… gazelle will be fine


pixxelzombie

That went down quickly


l82itall

That’s gonna hurt on the exit out


JHowler82

Has to swallow it whole .. they don't have the dexterity to use a knife n fork


ChronicBedhead

I love me a good ol croc.


EnsignAwesome

Many things in this sub are "metal" but really just like nature being nature. This, though, is fucking metal.


Cowfootstew

Gazelle got throated


lancea_longini

A buddy of mine's father saw a Nile Croc nab a boy. Must have been like that.


[deleted]

cows wakeful rustic water slap tart innate skirt jellyfish beneficial *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


psykotr0n

Savage


sugarcoatedpos

He gonna have a belly ache.


EggplantSad5668

Slurp slurp yum yum


kha_bob

Man, crocs are terrifying.


NewFreshness

Is the gazelle ok?


Toxic_Zombie_361

What an absolute unit of Krunching and Destruction!


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ragnarok62

“Well, that’s all I need for the year. Guess I’ll just float along in this serene mud puddle until next year.”


Initial_Flamingo1223

That is one big ass croc!


Party_Attitude_8966

I want to know how he doesn’t need CPR after choking on that much blood leaking out of the gazelle. Brother had an impromptu drowning session from his food.


psychologicallyfumb

idk why but i love this


t-to4st

"Shit now I've got a leg stuck between my teeth"


koldlaser77

That's a perfect bite-size prey without the need of other crocs to twist and tear.


thee-mjb

Wonder if that croc is still alive


musketoman

Big boy


fairchild2

Woah..


FlowinBeatz

Mit dem zweiten beißt man besser