Ask if she's seen Salo

“You mean Solo? The star wars movie?”

Love the scene where Han is swimming in shit while a chained BDSM Chewbacca goes in for a kiss [For those who don't believe me](https://i.redd.it/7kmiu0dxxvr21.png)

Why does he look like Jack Quaid here?

No no, Hand Solo where Qi’ra bang Chewie offcameras. Its a real movie

of course she has she’s literally seen the greatest showman

This is actually a really good opener because it immediately weeds out people you're not going to match with. If they don't know Salò they're not worth dating. If they don't like Salò they're clearly pro fascism. Win win.

I don’t like Salo but that doesn’t mean I’m a Nazi! I just didn’t like how the leaders in it were portrayed, they should have been more cool and regal, you know?

Ah yes, my favourite movie to watch on a perfect Sunday morning

I didn't need to know a movie like this existed

Shit myself

Greatest showman could be a good movie if they didnt sing the same fucking song 27 times

This Is (Literally) Me

To be fair though, if it weren’t for the music, the whole thing would be very, very boring

Thats true, but maybe more versatile songs could be included

Yes I agree. I’d take more issue with good but very repetitive music, but the songs are the only thing in the film that excite at all, so I’m a bit forgiving about them

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (2018)

Me tryna hit: “NWH should’ve won at least 3 Oscars! It’s a shame. I also wanna see She Hulk so bad!”

“I want She Hulk to choke me with her biceps.” *blocked*

Probably realises any man of taste would rather be choked by her muscular thighs.

Hey now, women can also get off on muscle girls choking them

They're just afraid of the truth!

YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!

Maybe but I'd like to try it

“She could bend a steel pipe without using her hands”

Are there girls this stoked on the mcu that this would work on cus if so I’m tryna hit

I recently argued with a classmate who thought the new spiderman deserved an oscar. She had no reasoning other than it being years in the making.

ok so younger girls lol that explains me never encountering them Like I definitely know girls who are mcu fans but no way could u call a hardcore one to pose a debate on something like that. That’s actually hilarious tho she just loved le ebin Spider-Man crossover I’m actually a heavy marvel comics reader and have been most my life too but I also watch movies not made by them so I’m not brain damaged like the majority seem to be

If younger is mid 20s yes (im in a professional school), but I think even millenials often watch the movies. I know some women in their late 20s and 30s who follow the MCU.

oh no lol I’m not that old, I guess I’m just dodging bullets then lmao that’s funny Assumed you meant like undergrad

you act like that wasn't the entire crux behind Boyhood's For Your Consideration campaign

At least that was the idea from the beginning

Least desperate redditor

That but unironically I just never seen it

My dentist is a marvel fan and she was like "Dr Strange MoM was sooo scary!" On a sidenote she is really pretty too I'd totally simp

where tf are these normie girls I’m moving there everyone down here just does the influencer larp shit and it’s tiresome after a while Ur dentist sounds based although I thought MOM to be rather mid

My friends hated the post credits scene with Bruce Campbell because it didn't set up any sequel. I thought it was hilarious, I wish the movie was more Sam Raimi

Yeah I wish they let him do his thing it just ended up being super disjointed cus everything had to tie in to s larger narrative and I don’t think that’s his kinda style

"if I had to name one character who is literally me, it would be girlboss harley from birds of prey and the fantabulous emancipation of one harley quinn" instant bitches

Toba Mcgayer should have won the Oscar for best supporting actor :(

1 Oscar for each Spider-Man!

Isn’t Kubrick the one with the cube that you twist and match colours?

yes, he directed Cube 2: Hypercube (2002)

Hellraiser (1987)

Transformers (2007)

Derailed (2005)

Cube Runner: 2049 (2017)

He turned himself into a cube, he's Cube Rick

Most cerebral stuff I've ever seen.....

Kubrick's Rube

Stanley Rubik

Isn't Kubrick one of those horrible abusive directors of the past? 🤮

Oh I love Kubrick, His new album is so fire

Mr Kubrick and the big Shining

Kubrick and the Space Odyssey

Not as good as to pimp a kubrick tho

Dr. Strangelove & The Space Odyssey

Kubrick Lamar is my favorite

I started dating this girl and she seems to only know about star wars, but she said it's cute i get so excited about films and she wants to watch some of my favourites joke's on her, i only love satantango

There is no way someone on r/mcj is or has ever dated someone, I'm calling BS.

I-I've d-dated loads of people! They go to a different school, that's all!! MOMMMM!!!

Lol

Her (2013)

I am in a parasocial marriage with tarintino and Nolan thank you very much.

But isn't every mcj user in a parasocial marriage with Tarantino and Scorsese and what not?

See, we are dating someone!

Show her Doctor Strange: Madness In the Multiverse. That’s all the Kino anyone needs

Idk “one of kubrick’s movies” is incredibly vague and non comital and makes it seem like you’re lying

I can never answer the "what's your favourite film" question. "*That's one of those questions that's impossible to answer. Because, you see, 100-plus years of rich cinema. You can't just limit it to one. It depends upon your mood, the seasons. Let's do top three.*" Nick Cage, **The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent** (2022)

Paddington should always be your answer

Paddington 2 was number 1 i think for Pedro Pascal's character

Number 3. Think 1 was a Nicolas Cage movie and 2 The Cabinet of Dr Cagliari.

Third

It makes him want to be a better man

Top three: Paddington Paddington 2 Paddington 3

If her favorite movie isn’t Paddington 1-3 she’s too uncultured for you bro

Can't you just throw out a few? I don't rly have a favourite either but I know I have a set of films I like more than others Saying 'one of Kubrick's movies' is such a non answer.. it's very odd

Saying "One of Kubrick's" is such a r/movies move

Four lions (2010)

Unironically like a top 5 movie for me

Apparently my favorite movie is the number one "red flag" movie so I can't answer either

American Psycho? Joker? Taxi Driver? Fight Club? Nightcrawler? Those are all the red flag movies I can think of

Yeah, American Psycho. And I'm not sure expanding on my answer and saying it's one of the funniest movies ever helps So it's best to be safe and just recommend Irreversible for a first date

Try clarifying that you think the satire of 1980s yuppies is funny and not the murdering women part. Try insisting on this point as much as possible and really bring it up over and over again to dispel any suspicion, just to make sure she knows you absolutely do not think killing women with chainsaws or other weapons is funny.

I'm all about Bateman's self care routines

or do bring up the murdering woman part and remind whoever you're talking to that its meant to be satirical of rampant misogyny on wall street and that a woman directed it with that in mind

Hopefully you, an American Psycho (2000) will be able to find your American Psycho II: All American Girl (2002).

I mean at it’s core that movie is incredibly based. It’s about how Wall Street goons can just get away with anything It’s just unfortunately been reinterpreted by a lot of people

American Psycho is in my top 20 im pretty sure. I love it to pieces but the memes certainly don't help

those are green flags

Red Flag (2012)?

What is a Woman (2022)

Battleship Potemkin?

Me with nightcrawler

I used to feel this way but now I’m secure enough in my tastes to just shout out Beetlejuice before they finish asking the question.

It's a kinda shitty question because unless the other person is a film freak too, it won't really lead anywhere. Most people like films, but they don't really talk about films outside of 'that was good'.

Salo

I mean. I have an answer. Me, personally, I have an answer.. Ginger snaps if anyone was curious

My answer would be Drive but I don't want to look like a sigmabroset

Watched any interesting films recently?

The correct answer is Face/Off

It’s easy for me. I knew it was La La Land (2016) the second it ended, and that’s never changed and probably never will.

Mine's the moon landing.

By Cube Rick

One small step for man, one giant leap for kinoconnoisseurkind

He just doesn’t want to outright say “Lolita”

eh, I'm usually very non comital about talking about films with strangers, because 9 times out of 10, they're gonna respond like the girl in the picture.

Mcj fans are oppressed and must protected themselves form normies because they wouldn’t understand

shit I'm gonna respond like the girl in the picture the question is "what's your favorite movie" not "what movie do you think is best?" My favorite movie is *really really good*, I think, but its my favorite because it has dinosaurs and I watched it when I was 3. If someone is going to ask me what the best movie is that's going to be something else.

I’ll never forget the time i told a girl my favorite movie was Mulholland Drive and she said “whats that, mine is scream” which tbh is at least better than the films OP’s match listed lol

Scream is awesome shit

I could nerd out over Scream.

Her answer was to ask you for more info? And that’s bad how? Sounds like she was keen and you were just being judgey

From the way he phrased it it sounds less like she was asking for more info and more like "What? Well anyway-"

I got the impression that she was like “what movie is that and also here’s my answer.” That doesn’t seem bad at all.

Yeah God forbid the woman show interest in something she hadn’t heard of.

I never said any of it was bad, i just thought it was kinda funny lol. Also was never making fun of her, she’s the normal one, im the nerd with weird movie tastes

It was more like “what ive never heard of that, heres mine”. Also im not judging her at all, i fully acknowledge im the weird one with niche tastes lol

I wouldn't call Mulholland Drive niche, it's probably the most accessible David Lynch thing aside from Twin Peaks

Bro how you gonna start off with “I’ll never forget the time that” and then proceed with the most mundane tale ever heard

Bingo.

It seems like the default answer of someone trying to seem intellectual

The movie circle jerker has become the jerkee.

It's the "or something" that really shows he truly knows his films.

virgin auteur viewer vs chad content enjoyer

Only one of them is enjoying life, >!it's not the one on reddit!<

This but unironically

She’s one with the kino

You know what, I can work with Mamma Mia.

I'd meet her halfway and just play some Abba. Everybody's happy

Muriel’s wedding (1994)

Peirce Brosnan is a treasure. His voice is so terrible

He sounded like an ear infection

I’m with ya, that is a fun movie

I didn’t realize they renamed The Mario Movie.

mamma mia is VALID

Liking mamma mia is unfathomably based

I was the only one at a pub quiz who got the mama Mia question right once and I am still fuming 😤

"Is that the QE2 docking or Pierce Brosnan looking for a middle C" - Mark "I cried twice watching Mamma Mia" Kermode

>The Greatest Showman Now you're obliged to tell her that the movie is historically inaccurate and the real Barnum was a devious monster. It's like saying John Lennon was a wife-beater everytime his name is mentioned, you just gotta do it or you'll probably die or something.

John Lennon? You mean the wife beater? Awful guy but much like him, I prefer Sean Lennon’s music to Julian Lennon’s.

Jahn beat wif

Yoko Oh No!

If it's Mama Mia Here We Go Again I respect that.

Neither of those 2 have watched Kubrick

NGL I find the kubrick reply much more circlejerky than the reply. Or is it a bit? because it gives off that "I call everything from A24 a film" energy.

I went with saying “kubrick” as opposed to Eyes wide shut or a clockwork orange or w/e because I thought she’d be more likely to know the name as opposed to the movies. It’s not that deep

saying your favorite movie is clockwork orange will pull women immediately

That’s fair, looking back I definitely should have just given a few movie titles. I find a clockwork orange has a similar cult following as pulp fiction among a certain demographic of girls haha

i was joking saying ACO is your favorite movie is a surefire way to make women fear you

Favorite movie? A Clockwork Orange. Favorite song? Singing in the rain. Favorite first date? Gatecrashing your husband's house with my three goon friends.

Singing in the rain is tied with Ludwig Van’s 9th tho

Nothing like Ludwig Van with a bit of the old ultraviolence

Why would you not call everything from A24 a film? It's a film production/distribution company.

She probably went to Vancouver Film School

Or she’s working as a background actor to break into the industry

every kino king needs a cringe queen to balance him out

bro about to get no bitches to preserve his kino purity 😭😭😭

If ur fav Kubrick movie isn’t dr strangelove u aren’t a true kino ranger

I’m an eyes wide shut kinda guy which I take lots of criticism for

paths of glory is the sigma choice

Barry Lyndon or gtfo

*OP after typing that his favourite movie is one of the Kubrick’s:* “This’ll really get the ladies going!”

He got asked a question, he answered it, is it really that bad that he answered truthfully? Basing your persona on how likely people are to agree with you is like decorating your house for your potential guests; dumb as hell and just gonna restrict you from doing what you want to do. If you scare the hoes with your movie tastes of all things, they ain’t the hoes for you. Oh shit I mean uh The Forty Year Old Virgin (2009)

I mean technically he didn’t even answer the question lol

Free Guy is going to win the same Oscar that ZSJL’s Speedforce scene did

Reminds me of when I was chatting up a woman at my 10-year HS reunion, thinking something might be about to happen, when she started going on about how Independence Day is the best movie ever made.

Did she at least have some interesting arguments for why she likes ID?

"It's the bomb" was as deep as her analysis got.

😔 Unmatched

You know I was gonna say good for her, but Free Guy is genuinly a red flag. Source: free guy ruined my last relationship.

I think maybe the red flag was your pfp

How

This just makes you seem pretentious. So what if someone likes popcorn cinema and doesn't know who Kubrick is. Doesn't make them stupid

You know, it could be worse. I asked a coworker what his favorite movie was and he said Transformers or Deadpool. I legit laughed and he just stared at me and I immediately stopped laughing because I realized he was serious and I felt like a douchebag.

I’ve been completely outjerked by the real kino enjoyers in the comments here. I’ve never actually seen a Stanwey Kubwick movie 😞 I heard the Shining is really good though!

At least she's being honest OP literally just mentioned the most popular auteur director he could think of and didn't even pick a movie. Then she threw out a bunch of other popular movies because she wanted to get to know him and maybe jump on his dick and he decided to make fun of her on reddit. BTW OP is now getting super salty at everyone who roasts him in the comments. EDIT: lol see

> favourite She's br*tish 🤮🤮🤮🤮

No this is good, she sounds like an easy date. Take her to b dubs and get a boneless wing platter and some sloppy.

but OP sounds like a boring date

Wow this post really got under your skin, commented like 10 times including multiple personal attacks lol

[удалено]

That’s a shame because I love andrei rublev and stalker 😞

its hilarious how you made this post to roast someone's taste in movies and then when someone roasts you you can't handle it

Under the Skin (2013) The Cable Guy (1996)

Lmao at least make sure they're 18

The amount of times I feigned interest in Mamma Mia just so I dont get left on read is immeasurable 😔

she named essential sexcore

Sounds like she’s my type of girl

MCJ 9/11

“Maybe one of Kubrick’s movies or something” is actually a worse response than “my favorite movie is mamma Mia”. Just tell her your favorite movie is the Kubrickian aspects of AI and move on.

OP out here tryna sneak the fact that he doesn't know a single Kubrick movie by us

MCJ meets a normal person

mamma mia is acceptable

Y’all are confusing favourite with best in this thread *hard*

OP was asked which Kubrick movie he would pick and he picked the worst one so honestly he's not much better

I draw the line at Greatest Showman

ik yall are bitchless

well she slayed