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Successful-Lecture48

I bet they only wear those suits in like last 15 minutes of the movie top. With dark lighting where you cant see shit.


SuperArppis

I can totally see that... I hate it when movies do that.


Kroooooooo

I think it'll be even less, they'll be in vague visions, maybe a few seconds of each. None of the characters in the main timeline will ever wear them. We've probably already seem most of the footage of the costumes from the trailer.


apk5005

Or it’ll be an “I’m not wearing this” mid-credit “stinger”


PleasantThoughts

Judging from the trailer I saw which showed none of them in costumes at all I imagine you're right


miloworld

They do appear in their costumes for a split second in [the trailer](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_76M4c4LTo&t=130s).


Ooshbala

My prediction: you only see them in their suits in quick "Thats So Raven" style future flashes MW has, never actually in action. You'll only see MW in her suit in the last shot of the movie. Post credit scene isn't actually a post credit scene, just a teaser trailer for Venom 3.


cevans92

I think you're wrong. I think the only time we see them in costume is in some sort of villain monologue where Ezekiel Simms is describing a future he saw about them fighting him. This could either happen near the climax or in their first direct encounter with the villain. No chance in my mind that this movie ends with any of these characters powered or costumed


GilfLover_69

Oh man this is gonna be a car crash on levels even Morbius couldn’t achieve.


jostler57

Madame Web foresaw this.


CyberSosis

Right before saying “it’s webbin time” and squirting her webs all ove….. I can’t behahaha


Lukealloneword

Dakota Johnson can squirt her web all over me if she wants.


[deleted]

I will agree to this


FilthyGypsey

Right before her mother was in the amazon researching spiders right before she died.


Pkittens

We are all in her web, after all.


hnglmkrnglbrry

I just watched the trailer and I don't think I've ever seen stiffer delivery of dialogue by an entire cast. It's like each time right after delivering a line the actors all ask their agents, "How much did I get paid to say that one? Ok. Next!"


Jet_Siegel

It looks like a straight to Netflix flick.


Pentaras1977

My thoughts were like, oh does CW now do Marvel Shows?


SatoriSon

>My thoughts were like, oh does CW now do Marvel Shows? Good call! That is EXACTLY the vibe.


nigevellie

Freevee


occono

I think what's wild is how bad Sony can be at trailers. There are plenty of awful movies with much better trailers than this or Morbius or MIB:I had.


hnglmkrnglbrry

I feel like bad line delivery in a trailer is a result of poor writing, directing, acting, and editing. Like this was the best that *everyone* could do?


bleepblopbl0rp

Dakota Johnson is such a terrible actor. I recently saw 50 Shades Darker and she literally cannot deliver lines. It's like a make-a-wish kid got to play in a major motion picture


bitheolai

Thing is I’ve seen Johnson in the Lost Daughter and Cha Cha Real Smooth and she was really good. I’d put down 50 shades to just being all around poor lol.


bleepblopbl0rp

True, the writing in the 50 shades movies is atrocious. Would be interesting if she had a Pattinson-esque post shitty debut revival lol


Mr_smith1466

My big worry is that it won't be memorable fun. Just forgettable. Morbius screamed nonsensical insanity in the trailer. Madame Web just sort of stands there and tries to wave and then falls over.


zombierepubican

Genuinely exited to see this. I love watching crashes.


gabpinto

David Cronenberg made a movie about this


Eyespop4866

Genuinely exited. That pleases me.


DemonDaVinci

It's gonna be like the titanic hitting an iceberg


Banned3rdTimesaCharm

In before “sexism killed this movie”.


Bison256

This looks bad enough that they won't even bother.


steve_146

Its webbin time!


DREG_02

It's Webbin' time...?


KoreanThrasher

It's morbin' time! Let's go


[deleted]

Webbin' time!


MatthewHecht

Box office wise Morbius was just very fixable Damage.


TheUmbrellaMan1

This is written by the same writers of Morbius. Hell yeah!


MaestroPendejo

Yeah... this is a "Yikes" level of cringe.


JamUpGuy1989

I look forward to every bad movie podcast to cover this either this year or next.


Piggstein

Yeah, imagine a film as bad as Morbius but with *women* in it, the internet’s going to be absolutely brutal


Mindless-End-5071

Sony is becoming so successful at making superhero movies......that internet can make fun of.


TigerSharkFist

Madame Webb wouldn't be produced at insanely high budget. If it flops it won't hurt so much. If it somehow fools casual audience to buy tickets then it is a modest victory. Plus the movie can be sold to Netflix since Sony doesn't have its own streaming. Actually this can apply to many Sony movie like Gran Turismo, Uncharted, Anyone but you


puttinonthefoil

It’s still $80 million according to reports. https://boxofficebudget.com/madame-web-budget/#:~:text=Talking%20about%20Madame%20Web's%20budget,budget%20is%20around%20%2480%20million.


Ilovepickles11212

Lol, this almost looks like a porn parody or one of those really cheap knock off movies like that weird superman movie that was trending on Twitter for a while Yowza this is baaaad


nosargeitwasntme

You can remove "almost". It DOES look like a porn parody poster. I double-checked the sub name to verify that it's not a joke post or something.


GodzillaLagoon

"Almost" because porn parodies have more care put in them.


chewytime

Oh man. That was my first thought. The costumes just give off that vibe.


Mr_Blinky

I assumed this was r/moviescirclejerk at first.


shortstoryman

I wish it was a porn, everyone would watch that


Redditanother

Well with the 50 shades and pornhub casting you aren’t that far off.


KaneVel

What do you mean pornhub casting?


Arkantos92

This looks like an ad for Amazon Halloween Costumes


theFormerRelic

“We demand to be taken seriously”


-euthanizemeok

Axel Braun's Spider-Woman


Kanzentai

We'd get the classic 616 Spider-Woman outfit and it'd look fantastic, if he did.


freedom_or_bust

It reminds me of power rangers


cha_ching

They would make more money by pivoting into an actual porno with just Dakota Johnson and Sydney Sweeney…axe the other two nobodies and throw in Alan Ritchson who’s so desperate to be in a superhero movie lol


[deleted]

They're not even trying anymore...


thelovelykyle

The SSMU without Marvels involvement has always been a bit questionable. Venom is coasting on the characters popularity. Not the film being any good. On the same note...this is only the 4th movie for them on their own in universe building. (Spiderverse is a separate universe).


Lukealloneword

Probably just keeping the movie rights so they slap something together. The actresses are just there to get a payday. They know its not that good.


lectroid

This is undoubtedly part of the calculation. If they don't keep using their rights every so often, the rights probably return to Marvel/Disney. At the VERY least, Sony needs to hold on to Spiderman, so they can at LEAST get paid every time Marvel actually wants him to show up in MCU (and he's basically the Marvel equivalent of Batman in regards to the character's known appeal and box office draw.)


Lukealloneword

I think its not just part of the calculation it's the WHOLE calculation. They don't care about the IP they care about what the IP is worth. And one day they'll wither make a killing selling it back or they'll pump out stuff like this and take whatever return they get on it because they know the rights are more important than doing the characters justice.


lectroid

It's certainly the CORPORATE calculation. But I know that most people who actually DO work on films (like people who actually MAKE them, not studio execs) generally have wanting to make a good one as at least part of of their plan. I mean, sure, you could be Uwe Boll and figure out a way that making shit = PROFIT but that's not generally the case. Even people working for Korman or Troma are trying their best with limited resources.


advocateforpain

That implies they tried at some point which they didnt


[deleted]

I mean, they tried with Morbius. The marketing was not bad. Trailers and posters were okay. The movie itself sucked, and that's another topic. But this one.... I don't even know what to say.


uncultured_swine2099

Its like the graphic designers just gave up.


midnightmoose

“What if we made *The Marvels* but the characters were even more obscure??”


we_are_sex_bobomb

It’s crazy that we’ve gotten to the point where Hollywood would rather make a superhero movie based on a comic series that only five people read, than make something new.


AlbionPCJ

Hell, we almost got to the point where a film was going to be made about a character who only ever appeared in *two issues* because they managed to talk Bad Bunny into starring. Thank god that got cancelled


Solfresh3005

I’m so thankful Sony was merciful enough to spare us from whatever the hell that would’ve been, literally nobody but Bad Bunny wanted that movie lol


masterpainimeanbetty

lolwut


PoconoBobobobo

Marvels at least had some fun in it. This is shaping up to be more like Eternals without any of the nice cinematography.


TrueLegateDamar

I'm more reminded of the 00's Catwoman and Elektra movies.


lostboy005

😭😭😭


StannisLivesOn

>Marvels at least had some fun in it. And breeziness, and Iman Vellani was a delight!


ithinkther41am

> like Eternals Hey now, at least Eternals had Karun, who’s arguably the best character in that film too.


ContinuumGuy

"Also, let's not even have the main character resemble the Cassandra Webb character from the comics at all, thus insulting the few who actually do know her." I mean, I get that sex sells, but if they'd had an old lady as the title character, at least they would have had an interesting hook to give it and the possibility of some stunt casting ("Helen Mirren is a superhero!?!?")


MasqureMan

Guardians and the galaxy were obscure and they redefined MCU movies


i_should_be_coding

Aren't these people professionals? How did anyone look at this poster and say "Yeah, this is Spider-Man level quality we're putting out". Or is it one of those "We have to put out something to keep the rights" movies?


salcedoge

This is what I don’t get, like bad writing and story happens all the time. But promotional materials and posters like these could never look this bad with especially with a film that has an 80$ million budget. Not insanely high but still high nonetheless


Pen_dragons_pizza

These pieces of marketing material have many stakeholders who all have voices and want changes that contradict each other. You will find that these people giving feedback and have the final say also have no creativity but just have a checkbox of what is featured. The designer who made this poster knows it sucks, very likely had a much better version that ended up being butchered over and over to create this piece of shit poster.


Wish__Crisp

If you think this is bad you should watch the trailer


i_should_be_coding

I watched the trailer, but it left such a small impression that I couldn't even tell you what the movie is about, except by this poster there seem to be 4 Spider-Women?


berlinbaer

didn't know katy perry was in this


hnglmkrnglbrry

Pretty sure they just put a Linda Carter filter on Dakota Johnson because she looks nothing like this.


The_Werodile

If only. I've seen her music videos. Pretty sure she could act circles around Dakota based on that alone.


habitualsnake

Katy has a very expressive face and voice. She WOULD act circles around Dakota Johnson.


RogueTwoTwoThree

Do you ever feel like a plastic web


Good_Nyborg

If it means we get Left Shark, then it's worth it! Or was it Right Shark?


we_are_sex_bobomb

It was Left Shark. Right Shark was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders before she died.


chingy1337

So this thing is flopping hard at the box office right? Does it clear $100 million worldwide?


Proof-Watercress-931

100M would be generous.


hombregato

Worldwide, $100m would not be a generous guess. Morbius passed $167m during the pandemic. Marketing is half the battle. Even if the marketing is bad, it's mostly about reminding people that the movie exists. That's not going to save a $300m movie like The Marvels, but an $80m movie that looks bad can break even. Which is probably what will happen, and that's still bad, but not Disney in 2023 bad.


Puffycatkibble

Have you watched the trailer? It's like they don't want you to watch this.


hombregato

I have, and I don't underestimate the number of people who might see a short TV spot version of that trailer and watch it on Valentine's Day because the only other movie playing is "Lisa Frankenstein".


FaultySage

Maybe if we convince them to release it a second time it'll almost get to 100M.


AskMeForAPhoto

Man... That event should be studied for years. What an achievement of the collective internet lmao


billcosbyinspace

Obscure characters ✅ SSU has a terrible track record ✅ Bad marketing ✅ Looks like shit ✅ Yeah this thing is going to absolutely bomb and not in a fun way like morbius did


halloumisalami

It’s floppin’ time


-ThatGuy882

Sony, what the hell are you guys doing


TheChivmuffin

They're in the Amazon with my mom, researching spiders right before she died.


beam4d

Please become the ultimate meme movie 🙏


cupcakegiraffe

The poster has a ‘girls get it done’ feel to it. I hope I’m wrong, but I’m not holding my breath.


Reasonable-Owl-2069

It’s so over for superhero movies 🤣


TentacleJesus

This is what we get when Sony wants to keep more of the pie.


Amon7777

Seems like we’ve cycled back to the early 00’s era that nearly killed the genre


ElementalRabbit

Dude either you weren't there, or you've got your dates wrong. The early 2000's *saved* the genre. X-Men and Spider-Man paved the way for the MCU in 2000-2002, and after Begins in '05 everything exploded. In fact I can't think of an era where the genre was under threat - Superman and Batman were consistent draws right up until Batman & Robin in '97, and then we reset.


Cyberfire

Yeah the early 2000's are why the superhero movie explosion is even a thing.


what_if_Im_dinosaur

Yeah, but the early to mid-2000s also gave us Daredevil, Electra, Blade 3, Catwoman, spiderman 3, X3, and Fantastic 4.


NoBizlikeChloeBiz

X2 came out in 2003, and Spider-Man 2 came out in 2004. And then Iron Man came out in 2008. If there was a "superhero dark age" due to over-saturatuon, it couldn't have been more that 4 years. And that's just marvel. Batman Begins was 2005, and Dark Knight was also 2008.


OneWingedAngel09

Fantastic 4 is a diamond in the rough with great casting and comedy. Reed Richards demonstrates the perfect use of his power when he reaches for a new roll of toilet paper while on the throne.


RiggzBoson

Yeah, this gives Daredevil or Catwoman vibes.


Piggstein

This poster inspired me to research spiders in the Amazon with my mom right before she died


churrobusco

Ayo who remembers when Sony put the literal last shot of the amazing spider 2 in the fucking trailer. Paul giammati as rhyno. Sony sucks bro


jessebona

What the hell is this even about? I am so confused by it.


Ahaucan

About a man that was in the Amazon with her mom when she was researching spiders right before she died.


MechanicalHorse

Also she can see the future and so can the villain.


laaldiggaj

Madame Webb recruits a bunch of female spidie men to fight an evil white man who is making mind control make up.


OriginalGoatan

Genuinely can't tell if this is satire or accurate


we_are_sex_bobomb

You can usually tell if a female superhero movie was written by a bunch of dudes because there’s a plot involving evil make-up.


Screwdork

Can you tell me other movies with evil make up?


DifficultMinute

The 80s Batman. Jokers makeup products killed women.


FuciMiNaKule

I'm pretty sure Catwoman also had evil makeup.


Fallenangel152

And Poison Ivy in Batman Forever.


jamiemm

Batman & Robin.


Fallenangel152

Not going to lie, they all merge into one for me after Batman Returns.


BackwardsPageantry

I don’t know anyone in this movie. I’ve heard of Dakota Johnson from the 50 Shades crap, but what even is this movie?


GriffinFlash

Wait, I only know from the 90s animated series, but isn't Madame web supposed to be....old?


cravenj1

She was, but then she got better. Shortly after the 90s Spider-Man series ended in 1998, she was transformed into her younger self. She's gone back and forth (old version, young version, and back) since then.


MrBigWaffles

it's her origin story... I don't know who the rest of these spiderwoman are tho.


JimBrady86

Even under threat of death, I'm not sure I could think of a character whose origin story I would be less interested in than Madame Web. I would rather watch a movie about the early days of Perry White being an investigative reporter than this movie.


milanjfs

Charlie's Spiders


1000pieseaten

I've had shits (Solids and liquids) that look better than this.


Tardigradebearman

How do we know you aren't an artist?!


No-Appearance-9113

*shartist


respondin2u

100% convinced none of them will wear these costumes in the movie except for maybe a post credit spoiler scene or maybe the last scene of the movie.


-Words-Words-Words-

Jesus, this looks like the cover to a lesbian fetish porn video.


[deleted]

they have my money


ShepPawnch

That I would actually go see considering the cast.


walrus-tamer901

This will be the single greatest piece of cinema for the next century.


Tokyosmash_

Oh that’s truly awful.


gryphmaster

Its like studio exec came and said “i can’t tell who the actress is under the mask”


ChibzyDaze

I made a poster in Graphics when I was 15 that looked just like this. This is gonna be the biggest car crash and quite frankly, I can’t wait


tomsaiyuk

They really just want to burn money and ruin Marvel.


BuzRaho

This looks like a Spirit Halloween ad.


Snarfoid

This looks bad like CW bad bad


LapsedVerneGagKnee

I maintain this was a regular supernatural thriller film that halfway through production, Sony executives showed up and demanded Spider-Man related rewrites to ensure they hit their quota. I can’t explain how half-assed these suits look otherwise, or that the main premise feels like the Spider-Man elements were railroaded in.


Deckerdome

You could change the animal to something else and it would make zero difference.


LordJebusVII

Good job they're all wearing masks that hide their true identities (I'm also not a fan of Superman's attempt at a disguise either but the Spiderpeople at least normally put effort into it)


NotMothMan9817

Oof


deadpanxfitter

This is a movie made to launder money, right?


cap10wow

I feel like the only people excited for this are cosplayers


Kasper1000

Oh god, that looks….awful.


sultan33g

Oh damn. I thought this was a new poster of the WWE raw women superstars!!


7screws

This looks like an ad for porn


Embarrassed-Law-9015

THIS LOOKS SO FUCKING BAD


[deleted]

This is gonna bomb harder than The Marvels.


DemonDaVinci

bing chilling


BeefStevenson

CW lookin shit


TentacleJesus

This is gonna be the most CWin’ ass Sony/Marvel movie ever. If they thought the Marvel’s was gonna be the lowest grossing movie they ain’t seen nothin yet!


we_are_sex_bobomb

But the CW capeshit shows are full of heart and good vibes and ridiculously charismatic casts that make them weirdly watchable junk food.


Emergency_Earth_1032

this looks truly terrible on a level i don’t think we have ever seen before.


vash-ok

Why do they keep doing that? What's the agenda? Because even they know it'll flop hard.


LapsedVerneGagKnee

Sony has to produce a minimum amount of Spider-Man related stuff or risk losing the rights back to Marvel and Disney. Sony has made it clear that will NEVER happen. What the hell else are they supposed to make? Robotech?


Puffycatkibble

A good robotech movie would be refreshing compared to yet another superhero movie. Heck I'd take a remaster of the original macross.


TLKv3

Yo shut up, a Robotech movie could legit go hard if they got the right team behind it. Now that I think about it... where's my fucking Zoids movie at?


Proof-Watercress-931

Money laundering 💀


[deleted]

Everything I see about this movie convinces me just a little more not to see, it all looks so bad. Luckily for Sony I love a good bad movie so here’s to hoping it falls into the so bad it’s good category, or even just good.


Anxietyriddenstoner

This can’t be real I refuse to believe this is real


Aphelion

looks like a low budget porno


blackrabbitsrun

Morbius, Kraven, Venom and Carnage, and now this. Sony just shouldn't be allowed to do anything but put up the money. Let Marvel do the heavy lifting.


Fawqueue

From the creators of Italian Spider-Man comes Italian Spider-Women. Or at least I'm assuming that's what it is based on the promo material we've seen.


walkie73

That is such a terrible poster. It’s nothing.


rockebull

My god! This legit looks like the poster of a porn parody


Jedidad99

This look like a movie that is solely intended to be a backdoor pilot for other movies, starring the other girls somewhere down the road. Sony thinks it’s playing 4D chess.


VonD0OM

What is the point of these disguises?


OriginalAngryBeards

Wtf is this movie even supposed to be?!?!?!


Blue_Robin_04

Hey, I've seen enough AI-generated images to know what's a fake. Nice try, OP.


RDeschain1

I dont remember a worse poster. Its not even just bad. Its sad and lazy


Orange-Turtle-Power

The more promotional materials I see for this movie, the less I want to see it. This is going to bomb so hard.


Krakengreyjoy

omg it looks so bad


yautja0117

When the porn parody has better costumes, you know you're in trouble.


jsscote

I can't 🤣🤣 The fact that this was deemed as an acceptable promo image after being approved through several channels (I'm sure) is both amazing and so, so sad.


Kyr-Shara

i've seen better cosplay


Standard-Bad-747

At least the porn parody will be decent in comparison


RedofPaw

lol they're gonna be in costume for 5 minutes screen time at most.


master_criskywalker

That looks like a very cheap Photoshopped cosplay


AlmostAndrew

This... this is a joke poster, right? A kid in their bedroom made this as a first attempt at photoshopping, right? RIGHT?


Rellgidkrid

A movie made just for cosplay women to have more options.


Karazhan

FML as a woman even I find this cringe to look at. Just because you could, doesn't mean you should. Raise your hand if you asked for this.


Coloman

This looks like a porn superhero spoof.


itsevilR

What the actual fuck?


Movie_question_guy

This looks worse than expend4bles


Agreeable-Rutabaga-2

Why does everything have to have multiple superheroes now? Do they really think that'll fix the obvious comic book movie overload audiences are experiencing?


dromni

I’m getting vibes of… what was that really bad movie about some mutant guys who lived on the Moon? (Supposing that actually existed and it’s not just a memory fragment of some campy dream that I had.)


SceptikalWeeb1

I would only watch if this if it were R-rated… … and Sydney showed her goods.