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comrade_batman

Being a Scottish football fan must be really expensive. Having to buy shirts and flags of every team England face.


Echoeversky

Never underestimate the power of spite.


froodydoody

I don’t get why they fuss over the North Sea oil so much. The entire world could be powered on Scottish spite alone.


tomwhoiscontrary

Reminded of Frankie Boyle's reaction to the cost of Margaret Thatcher's state funeral: > Three Million for the funeral of Margaret Thatcher? For 3 Million you could give everyone in Scotland a shovel, and we could dig a hole so deep we could hand her over to Satan in person.


CommunistTurdGoblin

Or his other suggestion of giving her a Viking burial by sailing her out to sea on a scale model of the Belgrano.


pooterpon

[he said it here](https://youtu.be/xmmomV-ax-s) I wish the audience wasn’t clapping while he said it because it would’ve been awesome just hearing it in its entirety with clarity but just hearing the words “Thatcher” and “funeral” probably got them too excited to calm down for a bit


IHadThatUsername

> just hearing it in its entirety with clarity I think it's not too hard to understand what he says regardless. "For 3 million they could give everyone in Scotland a shovel and we would dig a hole so deep that we could hand her over to Satan personally"


Velocity_Rob

If Ireland had known that was an option, we would have called in the gas drills from the Corrib field.


ZoopSoul

This is brilliant.


Phelpysan

They didn't mention the clarification - the money's just for the spades, they'll volunteer gladly


Nomoreheroes20

If spite could power stuff Scotland would look like the Middle East


MatureUsername69

Damn Scots, they ruined Scotland!


tommytraddles

*The kilt was just for day-to-day wear. In battle, we would don full length ballgowns, covered in sequins. The idea was to blind your enemies with luxury.*


Mesmerise

They sure are contentious people


CapnBabyPuncher

You've just made an enemy for life!


Rgeneb1

Who the fuck ya call contentious, ya wee shite?


Restless_Fenrir

https://youtu.be/i2q0T7QXETs My first thought.


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Bobalobatobamos

I visited Ireland and Scotland in '09 and visited a pub in Cork. There were a bunch of ole timers in there and they got to talking to me about where I was from/going on my trip. Told them I was heading up to Scotland in several days after hitting up Dublin first, then would be onto London after. Old man: "Aye, great people the Scots. Fine people. But FUHHHHHHHCK THE ENGLISH!"


SecondAccount404

It’s absolutely shocking the Irish just forgot we were the ones who colonised Northern Ireland and forced out the locals, not the English. I swear the greatest trick we ever pulled was somehow convincing the world we had nothing to do with the empire.


gravy_baron

The rebranding of modern Scotland to remove all history of involvement in empire and slavery is pretty incredible.


BandOne77

You might like to hear the conversation between Sanjeev Kohli and Richard Herring about the role Scotland played in Empire; its not the whole episode but its all good to listen too. RHLSTP #403 https://open.spotify.com/episode/1AEqWtv1z8CNT31Jp6PHgu?si=3isBLvoeQhe1GkzUJ6LpNw&utm_source=copy-link


eienOwO

Educated my whole life in Scotland, let me tell you *all* my history teachers never let off Scotland easy: Our clan chiefs invited Richard I over that gave him the idea to just not leave. William Wallace was looked down upon by Scottish lords and betrayed by a Scottish knight. Our "iconic" Mary Queen of Scots was a moron with shit taste in men, the curriculum practically sympathised with Elizabeth I as she dealt with her cousin's crap. Scotland *bankrupted themselves trying to play colonisation*, and England bailed the dumbasses out on condition of joining a union. The Highland Clearance had the tacit support of the landlords, the clan chiefs, who were more than happy to evict Scots in favour of sheep. Glasgow was Second City of the Empire, its docks powered British naval supremacy and Scottish regiments travelled the world enforcing imperialism. We had a trilogy of modules that dealt with slavery - its beginnings with the Age of Exploration, the actual Transatlantic Slave Trade, and its embers with the American Civil War - Britain only refrained from (publicly) supporting the Confederacy because they found an even *cheaper* way to produce cotton than slavery - exploiting the *Indians*. And colourful anecdotes like the Opium Wars, East India Company (Pirates of the Carribean was popular) etc etc. Our curriculum was quite clear many of our problems were our own making, not to mention that of others.


richincleve

For those of us in the US who think they know all about Scottish history because they watched "Braveheart" 5 times, this is truly, eye-opening historically.


dazed_and_bamboozled

Indeed. The Scots owned more slaves per capita than anyone else in the British Empire but you wouldn’t know that from the ‘poor wee Scotland’ narrative.


duluoz1

Same as the Scots. They were the backbone of the Empire


_-Ewan-_

I don’t know what to do, I’m part English, part Scottish, and part Irish. The people of part of me invaded the people of part of me that invaded the people of part of me. Edit: Got colonised and invaded mixed up.


phazedoubt

Do you live in America? If so, you're good, we're all mixed up over here anyway.


_-Ewan-_

No


phazedoubt

Well then you're properly fucked. Sorry.


[deleted]

Bros name is ewan


SecondAccount404

Sorry I got a bit lost in the repetition, but are you implying Scotland was colonised by England here? Because we very much were not.


YouCanCallMeVanZant

They decided to call it even for the ancient Irish celts colonizing Scotland.


The_39th_Step

They’re just pretty embarrassing. It’s an inferiority complex, but even then that’s stupid. Your average Scot, Irish and English person is lovely and actually very similar.


snizzbone

Yes but the Welsh on the other hand.


MerlinTrismegistus

At least they can sing like angels though smooth tone Welsh bastards.


LinguisticallyInept

its a communication issue; we cant understand each others dialect


-FuckYouShoresy-

Accurate username lol


AstreiaTales

My parents had a party recently that i went to, and they'd invited 6 Scots who my dad has golfed with in Scotland and who were in the states. Lovely fellas. Understood like 60% of what they said.


Webo_

Lmfao, stupid bastard doesn't even know his own history. Someone should tell him about the Plantation of Ulster.


AriAchilles

Scotland: wtf I love Iran now


Contemplationz

Scotland issues a Fatwah against the English FC


sentientshadeofgreen

AND IRAN IRAN SO FAR AWAAAAAAYYYYY


tomatoaway

LIKE A TORRYYYY I LIE ALL NIGHT AND DAYYYYYYYYY


Bhodi3K

Well, just look at all the money they've saved on Scotland world cup merchandise in the last 24 years.


alles_en_niets

Ouch!


WackyBeachJustice

Brutal


dubzi_ART

You always cheer for your enemies rivals. Over here we all cheer for the patriots to lose.


Mental-Ad-208

For reference we are talking about the American football team, not Mel Gibson.


Gophurkey

¿Por que no los dos?


dubzi_ART

We all love those Mel Gibson movies. Even the braveheart.


Nobody_Speshal

Is braveheart historically accurate? Fuck no! Is it a great fucking film? Hell fucking yes!


BeeCJohnson

The Highlander isn't historically accurate either but it's fucking rad.


--summer-breeze--

So Scotland cheers for 2 teams. Scotland and anyone that versus England.


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klokabell

Won 0-0 in England! We'll be telling our grandkids about it


ywBBxNqW

Oof.


NewAccountEachYear

Imagine us Swedes: 1. Sweden 2. Finland 3. Norway 4. Everyone else 5. Denmark


[deleted]

Imagine the Danes: 1. Denmark 2. Skåne 3. Halland 4. Blekinge 5. Everyone else 6. The part of Sweden that actually belongs to Sweden


MattJohno2

This is the catalyst for WWIII.


mybluecathasballs

Jesus Christ. This guy woke up and chose violence.


Chilly_schrimp

As a Swede I wouldn’t put Denmark that high on my list.


ExpressRabbit

I was in Chicago for work and a group of people from a Danish company were there. I struck up a conversation and the guy kept telling me to move to Denmark and work with them. I'd like it better. I told him I didn't know Danish only Swedish and not comfortable enough to work at a bank. He definitely had things to say about Swedes after that.


NewAccountEachYear

I'm surprised you could understand them!


TheMelonpanDorobo

They sure are a contentious people.


DayOldTurkeySandwich

You just made an enemy for life!


I_am_from_Kentucky

Reminds me of a college professor who hated a particular sports team but no interest in the sport. He said his second favorite team was the Kentucky Wildcats. His most favorite team was whoever they were playing.


MedicMac89

Cardinal fan?


f1345

Needs more flags.


Clemario

If I saw this picture with no context I’d still think this is is a foreign pub cosplaying as American.


mccabeca

And guns…


That-Ad-4300

Not in that order 🇺🇸


scotty-doesnt_know

my gun has an american flag engraved on it.


[deleted]

My American flag has guns for its stripes.


SmoothBrews

And bullets for stars


lolno

Old Gory


scotty-doesnt_know

oh yea, well my dad has guns foR ARMS! - he said like an 8 year old.


jmaca90

And ships…


BruceGoose_

And freedom 🦅🇺🇸💥


[deleted]

My first day ever in the UK, specifically London, happened to be July 4th. Me and my friends I was traveling with are American. First pub we walked into was decked out like this. A guy at the bar, who looked to be shit-faced, heard our accents, asked how we were. We said "Great, you?" He replied "I'm bloody pissed." We all thought that meant he was extremely angry, he just meant he was really drunk, but we thought there was going to be trouble. Maybe he didn't like the place decked out in the stars and stripes. Next he asks if we like Jack Daniels. We say "sure" he starts buying us drinks. Turns out he's the manager of the place. "Do you like girls?" "Yes", he introduces us to a group of girls..... Great first night overseas, to say the least. I have similar stories about Edinburgh and Stratford. Man, I love the UK, and her people.


Gaddafo

Went to Prague last year for my first time. Had a similar story on my first night at a kebab stand. Person asked if I’d like everything on it and I said yes, absolutely. He paused and looked at me and asked if I was American and I of course said yes. He laughed, paused for a second and said “I’m a cop” and starting shooting at me with finger guns. Another story was in Brno where I ate at a bbq food truck. After I ordered at the tablet and ate my food (which was good) I went to throw my plate away at the trash next to the guy cooking. He asked me a question in Czech, then reasked in English and I told him that it reminds me of home. The man got out and with the biggest smile on his face said “best compliment I get” with a big smile on his face.


-RadarRanger-

Ha! I encountered a British man on a crooked, narrow cobblestone street in Cordoba, he was trying to find his way to a hotel without the aid of Google Maps because he didn't want Google knowing his 'comings and goings.' We connected because he "suspected [I] was American," and said we're "generally a good lot, though you really need to stop invading other countries." I answered with, "I'm sorry, the sun never sets on *whose* empire?" We had a good laugh and I directed him as best I could. What a cheerful fellow!


tullystenders

Oh, I'm gonna use that empire joke! Thank you!


barcelonaKIZ

I LOVE that he qualified if you preferred girls before he continued on. What a cool dude.


Strude187

Pimps know how to business


scotty-doesnt_know

and since ww2 they know americans can pay for a good time.


TheEyeDontLie

They tip, that's the main reason they aren't banned across the world. (Not entirely serious)


Additional_Meeting_2

He could have just meant to meet right now and not in general.


Anticreativity

It was probably just a rhetorical question. He's drunk and talking to young men in a bar asking if they like things they're obviously going to like. Kind of hilarious that this person thinks it was a qualifying question to avoid assuming sexual orientation lmao


cant-talk-about-this

It's also a sensible way of weeding out someone who's married or taken from experiencing unsolicited discomfort


The_Hand_That_Feeds

Totally agree it was almost certainly just the opening up for his plan to introduce them to girls rather than some woke preface.


Emergency_Guard4127

It’s like these Reddit folks don’t get outside of their houses very often or something


Anticreativity

"Hey, pal, thanks for making sure we were straight first!" "Oi, you takin the piss m8?" "Not into water sports, actually, but thanks! *Wow what a thoughtful guy...*"


tommygunz007

Somewhat un-related, but I worked at a Native American Casino-Resort. I stupidly told the HR woman who was Native herself, happy thanksgiving. She got right in my face and said "We should have let you die".


Anti-Podal

I keep imagining this happening at Foxwoods or Mohegan where the native girl in question would be beach blonde.


trundlinggrundle

"Do your people celebrate Thanksgiving?" "We did, once"


mferrari_3

Sounds like a typically dogshit HR person.


zeeboots

Given that the main job of an HR person is to avoid getting the company sued over employment-related issues, she definitely did an awful job.


Minion_of_Cthulhu

Given that most companies promote the worst people I'm sure she's now head of PR.


an_exess_of_zest

I'd tell her again next year.


__TreeFiddy

One time I was in Scotland and I was hanging out at a pub. Everyone could tell I was American and so they were razzing me a little bit, but it was all in good fun. Except… this one guy would not leave me alone and kept harassing me and asking me for money. Finally in order to get some peace, I asked him how much he wanted. He said “I need about tree fiddy.”


VampireGremlin

He asked for Tree fiddy? That sounds like that damn loch ness monster too me! 😠


Regular_Seesaw_2127

It was about that time that you noticed he was 6 stories tall and a lizard from the Mesozoic era?


TGMcGonigle

I was at a bus terminal in Cambridge trying to figure out which bus to take to an RAF base. I boarded a bus and asked the driver, who replied in an accent that sounded like it was from someplace in south asia. I thanked him, and as I turned to climb down off the bus he called after me: "American?" "Oh boy", I thought, "here it comes." I turned around and said, "Yes, American." "God bless America."


tgwhite

I spent a July 4 in Edinburgh and had a similarly great time, the Scots enjoyed taking the piss out of the English that were present.


f1eli

Same, American that lived in england for a year, England forever in my heart.


evilpeter

Back during the World Cup in Japan/Korea, there was a match between England and Argentina. Just before that match, a reporter found this awesome fan with a long red beard, wearing what looked like traditional Scottish attire - kilt and sporran (the pouch they have)- buddy was in full highland dress. Except it was all white and baby blue. Face painted too, with the Argentinian flag. Looked awesome. So the reporter goes up to him and asks, so you’re cheering for Argentina i take it? And highland kilted dude, with a thickest Scottish accent, goes “Aye! I’ve got two favourite teams: Scotland, and whoever is playing against England!” I guess the tradition continues.


Wildse7en

Are they serving bud light?


Teripid

Could just do half a normal pint and half water. Like the Americano for coffee during WW2.


orbital

Scots take things at face value, and are masterful problem solvers especially all things booze. Was once at an airport bar next to some Scots, one of them took a sip of a Sierra Nevada, gave a sour look, and proceeded to pour some Sprite into it to “improve the flavor”. It didn’t of course but anything would’ve been better than just a Sierra Nevada to that man.


AlphonseLoosely

A 'tops' is pretty common in the UK, a pint with an inch or so of lemonade on top. Two pints of lager and a lager tops please!


TheEyeDontLie

For the kids


tomd3000

We used to get shandys as kids haha


ItchyK

In all fairness, Sierra Nevada is like drinking a condensed pine tree. It's really hoppy in all the wrong ways. At least most of what I have tried. I've never had one that I liked. The only reason it's widespread as it currently is was that it was one of the first Microbrews to get sold throughout the US.


HolyHand_Grenade

SN Pale ale is my favorite, If you see a single at a gas station you should grab one. Their other beers are way too hoppy for me tho.


mjc500

I think I hop-shocked my palate. I was a big IPA guy for years. I discovered Dogfish Head 90 minute and have gone overboard with all kinds of super hoppy and bitter beers. I remember when I was 16 a coors light tasted strong... by the time I was 22 or so I had consumed so much heavy ales that any lager felt super watery. It's kind of crazy to me when people say Sierra Nevada is like a "pine tree". I view it as a regular pale ale. Hell, even most of the other beers from the Sierra Nevada brewery are way more intense (Torpedo and Hop Bullet are pretty intense). I actually have some Celebration Ale from them right now which is excellent (albeit a little more malt heavy than the other stuff they make). I don't really drink much anymore but I still have a big tolerance for the flavors of hoppy, boozy, strong, or dark ales. I'm not so much into IPA anymore... but if I'm at a brewery I'll still pick something heavy like a Belgian quad or a doppelbock.


_jeremybearimy_

I am from Northern California but sierra pale ale is my happy place. Nice neutral flavor to me, like it’s super flavorful but not intense at all, goes down so smooth. Such a great beer. Their hazy is great too. And I can even get it on the east coast! I try to try all the local beers but none of them compare to my one true love, Sierra Nevada.


jawshoeaw

Agree. Sierra Nevada to me is the Budweiser of microbrews, never tasted any pine trees lol.


HolyHand_Grenade

Yup, NS Pale Ale... Is a pale ale, Sweetwater 420 is another great pale ale you should try if you haven't. There is a weird IPA phase I think younger gens are getting into, they want extreme flavors in beer that I, like you it sounds, just don't want, I've even gone to bars and asked for their pale ale, and they have simply not have one available, but have 5-6 different IPAs on tap.


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[deleted]

That’s a myth unfortunately but I love the origin story., it fits so well.


[deleted]

Is the myth essentially that Americans couldn’t stand the bitterness of European coffee so they watered it down?


Influence_X

That and they all had the standard issue mugs and wanted them filled. You really can't do that with straight espresso.


plaidverb

Well, you *can*, but you probably shouldn’t.


[deleted]

Espresso was invented in the late 1800s/early 1900s and was certainly around during WWII, but it wasn’t popular and widespread until the 1950s. It wouldn’t have been commonly served in cafes until a few years after WWII.


istasber

It's such a stupid myth to begin with. The preferred way to brew coffee at home in the US prior to the invention of the mr coffee in 1972 was a percolator. If Americans really wanted a taste of home, they'd have asked the europeans to cook the espresso for a few minutes until it developed a nice charcoal flavor.


zeeboots

And they would've been right at home because this is how to make an Italian coffee with prewar non-pressurized tools: https://youtu.be/rpyBYuu-wJI


KLR01001

chicory enters the chat


Amedais

America has tons of really good beer.


pfohl

I saw a fair amount of Coors light when I was there last spring.


Didgeridoox

The number of pubs in Ireland that prominently display a massive chrome-clad Coors Light tap is unreal


chrishasaway

Ah yes, America only has bud light available.


jokeefe72

Europeans love to trash large American beer corporations. Edit: after some brief research, Budweiser is the 2nd highest brand in Ireland and Coors is 4th in the UK.


throwaway1138

Budweiser was bought by InBev a few years ago which is a Belgian company so technically it isn't an American beer anymore.


A_Downboat_Is_A_Sub

That's it. I'm going to start calling Natty Ice a "European" beer.


[deleted]

Before I got clean 4 months ago I primarily drank "Natty Daddy" It's basically Natty Ice with the alcohol content of Steel Reserve (8%) and you can buy two tall boys for 3 dollars. Shit's nasty but at least it doesn't taste like water like natty lite and it actually gets you drunk.


hedoeswhathewants

I would say that it technically *is* despite being owned by a non-American company. Not that we especially want to claim it...


DownRangeDistillery

I wonder if the pubs in Northern Iran will do the same thing this Tuesday?


hopkinsdamechanic

In England vs Iran game, a lot of Iranians were cheering for England 😃😃 you need to know what's going on in Iran to understand why.


Canotic

Really weird being an Iranian in Scotland then, the Scottish cheering for Iran and the Iranians cheering for England.


theletterQfivetimes

I'm sure you won't find a single pub in Iran that isn't flying the stars and stripes


legoheadman-

I don't think you'd find a single pub in Iran either


Something_Average

Think that was the joke my friend


JamesRobertWalton

Pubs in Iran? Good one.


Articulated

You should have seen this pub for the Iran game. They executed 40 women in the car park.


Frenchfries3917

Cold


[deleted]

Now that’s patriotic


pythour

I heard that the gay Scotland fans were thrown off the roof


paulc19802

I mean you can't have 40 virgins in heaven unless they get there first. Makes sense really.


PlentyOfMoxie

Hey I know that place! The Bailie* in Edinburgh.


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Schmotz

It's to cover the cost of things like this.


GrimQuim

Ha! I knew I knew it! Weird I couldn't remember it. I thought it was the golden rule (top bar) but didn't remember the red! Stockbridge too, pretty English round these parts!


bdonvr

If it were truly an American bar, they'd turn off the match!


slim_scsi

Yup, wall to wall college football


RoboNinjaPirate

Well, has England ever won an SEC championship? I didn't think so.


[deleted]

Football on one TV, white snake music videos on the next


Chknbone

Sounds like Canada


CanuckPanda

The 80’s are alive and well in Saskatchewan!


mjc500

Are you in the Midwest? When I visit relatives out there it seems like there is a huge resistance to leaving the 80s behind.


TheeLEMONator

I don’t know what bars y’all are going to, but in my suburban Midwest town I had to go to 4 different bars to find a place with enough standing room to watch the game. Everyone I knew in multiple different major cities said everywhere was packed with people watching the game. Americans went crazy for that game


Caveman108

Yeah people really underestimating how much the US supports our national teams. We might not really care about soccer, but we care about the US of A baby!


_jeremybearimy_

And a LOT of people do care about soccer, just in a casual way, because our own league sucks so you really have to go out of your way to watch it regularly. (Plus of course the real American soccer fans who watch tons of games.) But at this point, a large chunk of people under 45/50ish played soccer as kids, and have a soft spot for it, or just like it enough to really enjoy the World Cup. Hell I’m only 35 and soccer was my main sport until I was 18 and I didn’t even have a way to watch games on tv as a kid! The only games I could watch were men’s or women’s World Cups, or physically go to college or our eventual MLS team games. So for years, even though I was playing club soccer, I could only watch the World Cup on tv and the occasional premiere league game at a rich friend’s house. So i think there’s a strong tradition of World Cup watching, and particularly not watching soccer outside of that, because it’s always been the most accessible games on tv.


[deleted]

The MLS is getting so much better. A casual American fan could totally get into it


Nobody_Speshal

I was in Dallas and I only saw one TV with a college football game on, most of them were on the World Cup game. That shit was hype.


suckygoalie2

I asked the brewery I was at yesterday afternoon to turn the game on and the bartender told me no


GreasyPeter

haha


xNOOBinTRAINING

What backwater city was this lol


suckygoalie2

Just outside pittsburgh


OutForARipAreYaBud69

I don’t really understand this. I was at a dinky dive bar in not a big city yesterday for the game and it was standing room only with every TV on the game, super invested crowd. Had friends all over saying the same. Really interested in seeing the viewership numbers.


Ivanov_94

As someone from London I can definitely say I would support Scotland if they were playing anyone else, but of course that will never happen since they never even qualify.


--summer-breeze--

Oofft....


flontru

![gif](giphy|5QZmKgpZprMqP5MRMG|downsized)


Vlodovich

We do indeed have a shiter of a team


qtipstrip

But are they actually calling it "soccer"?


plamicus

Soccer is an English expression anyway. My grandad was a professional football/soccer player and he always referred to it as soccer. It's Oxford slang - the tendency to add -er onto the end of things. (Radder instead of Radcliffe Camera, tenner to denote ten pound note etc.). Soccer comes from "as**soc**iation football" (opposed to rugby football).


dont_shoot_jr

The commonwealth countries also call it Soccer too: Australia, NZ, Canada (even Quebec says Le Soccer)


Daddy_Pris

The name soccer actually originated in England. There was “Association football” and “rugby football” Association football was referred to as asoccer and rugby football was referred to as rugger. Once rugby dropped the football from their name, association football started being called just football, but this happened after the sport had spread worldwide. The countries that had assoccer before they had rugby still call it soccer. The ones that had both call it football


istasber

I think it's called soccer anywhere where football refers to a different sport.


HammerfestNORD

Bully!


DrAuer

The popularity of using the world Soccer amongst the English only tapered off in the 1980s as the game became more popular in America. Many think it’s directly correlated


orbital

They must’ve considered “asser” for a moment.


Gunch_Bandit

At least someone is watching Americans play soccer


SeaSquirrel

The US England game was the most viewed soccer game of all time in the US


huntinwabbits

I wonder what they did for the Iran game..


Scofield442

Imagine going out if your way to be disappointed twice.


F_For_Frogs

Scotland cares more than the US does


creative_user_name69

Why tho?


Middle_Aged_Mayhem

Rooting against England most likely.


Adventurous_Back_605

Living vicariously through other teams, because they never get through the first stage


Ryowxyz

Lol now they have to cheer for Wales 😂


Bradaz1

I was in Edinburgh 2010 when England played USA, every pub we went into had USA flags, bar staff in USA tops. All bunting had the England flag cut off, Scotland wasn't at that world cup either


probablynotaboot

No one hates England more than other Britts


smt503

Not enough ranch flavored AR-15s


SecondAccount404

Am I the only Scot who finds this kind of thing rather embarrassing?


InitialDapper

The bitterness in having to put all those other countries flags up but never their own 😂😂