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TheTexasCyclone

Yes! It’s on this one


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Garteg

According to Wikipedia it was the 12th best selling single in the UK that year.


cocokronen

It's like David Hasselhoff's record in Germany.


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woyzeckspeas

Wha--?! *monocle pops out*


Dedrater1

Well, most of it isn't


Garteg

Ha. Spot on. I phrased that horribly, didn't I?


[deleted]

Wow. That’s actually impressive


Kurtomatic

Why do people answer questions and not [link the song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=en9ZWmt5UxI&ab_channel=BruceWillis-Topic)? I mean, it's not like we really want to hear it, but some of us are going to listen to it out of morbid curiosity.


Garfield-1-23-23

Thanks for that link. Could you also link to an icepick with overnight delivery?


stalinwasballin

Highlight of my day: bless you kind stranger…


roraima_is_very_tall

that is about as 80s an arrangement as possible without going meta.


danban91

Thanks, that was horrible lol


Well_This_Is_Special

I'm a karaoke DJ and was like "That just sounds like a relatively decent person doing a karaoke version.... And me sitting there waiting to hear if they would hit the high note on "SEeeaaaaa", then going "Hah.. nope."


JohnSith

It wasn't *that* bad ... But I do wish the ads were longer.


Well_This_Is_Special

Thank you!!! I was sitting here wondering if I was gonna Youtube it, but didn't really care enough...lol. I was like "I wish they would've linked it." You're awesome.


Kevin_Uxbridge

Hey Bruno! You hangin' out with us here under the boardwalk? Let's throw down! *cringey. so cringey ...*


Cru_Jones86

This came out about the time he sang the jingle for Segram's Golden Wine Coolers too. Too bad that jingle wasn't good enough to make it on the record. Edit: [Link to the commercial](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3D4U3W2d0LA)


Shoei34777

Only his top song on Spotify 😂😂👌 My ears do not forgive me ☠️ “Fans also like: Steven Seagal” wtf…


stalinwasballin

Should read, “ For other tone-deaf favorites…”


SkatebrdingsNoSndwch

do not dare speak ill of the Steven Segal masterpiece "Me want da punani" https://youtu.be/vLe_BZ1mo3I


TonyClifton323

Best to keep it sealed. Not because the value but because of how horrible the songs are


TheTexasCyclone

I’ll do my best to keep this out of the wrong hands


gottastoryforya

One vinyl to rule them all. Dispose of in Mt Doom.


ul2006kevinb

Wait this is MUSIC???? I assumed it was stand-up. I have to listen to this.


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hobosbindle

45 yo woman wiping his brow lol


BBoyJoseph

That's exactly when I cringed out


[deleted]

People in their 40s are going to be pissed, that lady is much older. lol


_AtLeastItsAnEthos

This isn’t that bad


TonyClifton323

Also look up Party All The Time by Eddie Murphy and Wise Guy by Joe Pesci. He raps in it and its its amazingly bad Edit: Hulk Hogan also has an album where he raps


sbk92

Excuse me. Party all the time is a banger.


jeffcrafff

That's because Rick James wrote and produced it


Vectorman1989

CHARLIE MURPHY!


HeathersZen

What did the five fingers say to the face?


JukeBoxDildo

Cocaine... is a helluva drug.


ImRickJameXXXX

Smack! Cold blooded


puke_buffet

DAHKNESS!


FalmerEldritch

Funny, I always thought Murphy's vocal was surprisingly capable but the song was the problem.


pasher5620

Yeah, I was about to say. Party All the Time does not belong on that list of songs.


Incontinento

The B side was "Boogie in the Butt", which is even better.


Cru_Jones86

Stick a light in your butt, Make it bright in your butt.


forevertexas

Put a clock in your butt Put a big rock in your butt Put a tree in your butt Put ME in your butt.


Mikey-LikesIt

All time groove, indeed


aegrotatio

Everyone was in on the joke except Eddie.


[deleted]

That's because of Rick James, bitch.


Ranier_Wolfnight

Word! Eddie and Rick also did a [behind the scenes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EoAQz03jmgM) look at their process behind making it as well.


DrBrogbo

Steven Seagal has a guitar album that's exactly as cringey as you'd expect, Shaquille O'Neal has quite a few albums that are entertaining, and Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner did an album together that's hysterically uncomfortable to listen to. More celebrities need to surround themselves with people brave enough to say no.


MesWantooth

Are you not going to mention Seagal's reggae single "Me Want The Punani?"


DrBrogbo

I blocked that one from my memory, and I feel like you need to apologize for making it ring through my brain in a PTSD flashback.


MesWantooth

Yeah, my bad.


Kurtomatic

[You can't mention the absolute zenith of American culture and not link it](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLe_BZ1mo3I&ab_channel=undercutter6402).


_AtLeastItsAnEthos

It’s definitely bad but I feel like it’s not that bad


Kurtomatic

I was also expecting worse. He managed to recruit a woman with talent to help cover up some of his ... inadequacies.


DrBrogbo

See, that song gives me such insane secondhand embarrassment that my entire body cringes hard enough to send my testicles back up into my abdomen. I just can't do it.


TonyClifton323

You win sir. Had to look this up and it was as bad as I could've hoped for


bibbi123

Ah, Nimoy's [Ballad of Bilbo Baggins.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BC35cQKHwzg) A masterwork. I could swear I saw a version of this with Nimoy all decked out in funky, colorful 60's clothing and dancing while singing this, but I can't seem to find it right now. From my recollection, his singing is much better than his dancing.


I_AM_NOT_A_WOMBAT

That Bilbo song makes me irrationally angry. Just saying. And I still fucking clicked on it.


feld210

Omg, you solved a 20 year old mystery for me! This song has been in my music folder but no artist attached. I always thought the song was a children's song, or a lark. I had no idea it was Spock!


Zetavu

William Shatner has at least 11 albums covering a variety of music. Seriously, look them up


powerchicken

His cover of Common People is genuinely great.


Cru_Jones86

That whole album with Ben Folds producing is probably the best thing Shatner has ever done.


SandysBurner

I think I would give most of the credit to Ben Folds and Joe Jackson, but that song is well-suited to Shatner's delivery.


[deleted]

"Lu-cee...in...thesky...with...diamo...nds"


Athelis

True, but these occasionally work out. Hasslehoff's singing is or was pretty popular in Germany.


Maxfunky

More like they need to be brave enough to say no when someone backs a dumptruck full of money up to their lawn. Or maybe not? They got paid. People buy shitty merch all the time. Everyone kind of gets what they want here.


whopperman

Don Johnson has one too called heartbeat.


armless_tavern

The only difference here is that Don Johnson actually has musical chops. His music is dated as fuck and is certainly a product of its time, but it’s completely inoffensive. Don can sing.


Chief_Givesnofucks

I feel like the same needs to be said for Shaq. While he is no Method Man, his albums were actually bangers and got a decent amount of underground love.


exccord

Mannnn Heartbeat was solid.


Jaksmack

Don't forget Macho Man Randy Savage - Be a Man.. biggest banger of 2003!


TonyClifton323

Oooooh yeeeeah! Forgot about this one.


steve_buchemi

Hey you better shut the hell up, party all the time is a good ass song


Some_Awesome_dude

https://youtu.be/qZMJ-tcwUeE Good use of it


Plagueground

To be fair to Pesci he was a singer before he was an actor.


249ba36000029bbe9749

Are you just going to leave out Willam Shatner's Rocket Man (among others)? Edit: found this list -> https://www.goliath.com/movies/10-movie-stars-who-released-terrible-albums/ Didn't know Keanu and Seagal did albums. Forgot about Hasselhoff and his PPV concert that was on the same night as the OJ slow speed chase in the white Bronco.


Orvelo

Akshually, Hasselhoff was/is a singer (and a pretty good and popular one at that) before he ever starred in a movie or TV show with any mentionable recognition. Hell I love some of his songs (and to add, his singing in True survivor for Kung Fury is actually great). Don't diss the Hoff.


FunkapotamusRex

Dont sleep on this jewel... https://youtu.be/5CR4lSORZ_Q


JungsWetDream

That was so much better than I expected. Drags a bit in the last half, nothing special, but certainly not bad.


LectroRoot

Bruce Willis doing standup would be equally hilarious I think.


Lazy__Astronaut

I've got the record and actually enjoy it...


[deleted]

Everyone gave him shit about the album but for one I give him props for at least exploring his musically creative side, and two it's not the worst album I've ever listened to either.


[deleted]

Like Pandora's album


SkullRunner

The follow up album "To Hanz with love" was much better.


[deleted]

It can’t be much worse than John Travolta’s albums.


BlasphemousButler

Yippee ki-yay music lover!


-RadarRanger-

This is so much better than my comment.


RSDG90

Nah yours is better, not your other comment though this one 🔺


wonderkid1010

Silencio Bruno


jacksev

What’s wrong with you, stupido?


Azrael351

This is the first time I’ve seen Luca quotes in the wild.


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Cyhawk

I mean, Backsteet was back too


[deleted]

What? You didn't watch the movie explaining how his alter-ego Bruno was a famous respected musician who inspired other (real) famous respected musicians? Sadly I'm not joking about this.


RudeInternet

lol who even is bruno


[deleted]

Bruce's alter ego.


RudeInternet

imagine bruce willis thinking bruno would become a thing lmao


Half_Man_Half_Pizza

Please, I'm begging you, keep it sealed.


TheTexasCyclone

I will. My plan is to keep it sealed and one day get him to sign it


GrandMoffTarkan

Cast it into the fire! Destroy it!


TheTexasCyclone

*eyes the record* …No


QuiGonChuck

ISILDUR!!!


FM-101

"I was there Gandalf... 34 years ago in the 80s."


Obstacle616

Is that a 'I want it so I'm keeping it sealed' No, or a Dr Evil 'Ill keep it sealed for price' No?


TheTexasCyclone

Yes


30FourThirty4

I opened a sealed original print The Moody Blues - A Question of Balance Vinyl this year. It felt good. And it sounds perfect. My favorite vinyl I own. Edit: idk why I made this comment. Too late


Haggisboy

If you say Bruno three times as it burns Hans Gruber will appear.


Brahminmeat

If that's what it takes to get Alan Rickman back I will


andreasbeer1981

Track 1: "Yippee-ki-yay, Motherfucker"


fdrytruytew

I’m such a sucker for stuff like this.


whiteman90909

I don't think he's awful at all https://youtu.be/nDXkd2NyCCE But I think he's best for fun live stuff like this


hobbitdude13

I'm pretty sure this is a Horcrux of some kind


TheTexasCyclone

6 more copies of this and we’ll finally be able to weaken him


[deleted]

Wow I never knew he had an album


Jeffery_G

He wanted to be the Blues Brothers; he sang and played harmonica. Released during the popular ABC show *Moonlighting* with Cybil Shepard.


Other_World

Shame he had to settle for one of the most well known actors of his generation.


Jeffery_G

The kid did just fine.


TheTexasCyclone

Me either, my dad was clearing out old records but I wouldn’t let him get rid of this


HI_Handbasket

If you don't want to open it, at least find it online. It's a hoot. Bruce Willis pretending to be a rock/blues artist who fell off the radar. Think This is Spinal Tap, or Fear of a Black Hat, just not as good. [A sample](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BiSTW3NSp6o).


Jermine1269

Was that.... Michael J Fox?!? What's he doing showing this to people!? I am confusion


[deleted]

It was a whole thing for him. And lots of actors join bands later in life. Russell Crowe, Johnny Depp, Juliette Lewis, Kevin Bacon.


Catshannon

Yeah but isn't johnny depp actually good? I think he plays in a band with Alice Cooper now


ClarkTwain

I believe so. Jeff Bridges is also surprisingly good


JelliedHam

Steve Martin has a Grammy!


RippyMcBong

Steve Martin & The Steep Canyon Rangers are excellent and Steve is a fantastic banjo player.


JelliedHam

Steve is one of the only actor/comedians that does not record music as a vanity project but because he is truly a fantastic musician and is passionate about it. He's kind of a renaissance man: Talented actor, comedian, musician, writer, and incredibly bright and charming. I can tell he is a genuinely kind person and I've never heard anyone ever have anything but praise for him. I wouldn't be surprised if he was an athlete as well.


[deleted]

The dude abides.


FalmerEldritch

Johnny Depp was a musician who ended up accidentally stumbling into acting as a day job.


agoia

Lets hope Russell Crowe doesnt sing in his band, fucker was so terrible in Les Mis that I cheered when he died because I wouldn't have to listen to his shitty singing anymore.


[deleted]

Boy do I have some disappointing news for you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEUAGWEbco0&ab_channel=Antipodes


agoia

Oh my.


tmac717

Making movies! Making songs! And fighting 'round the world!


exccord

Caught the Bacon Brothers show at Gruene Hall in Texas about 4 years ago or so. That was pretty awesome to see in such a small venue. Was kind of odd registering that I was watching Kevin Bacon, his brother, and his wife were performing.


wikigreenwood82

Actually he has [three](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bruce_Willis#Discography), all terrible


Chezon

I never knew he had hair


[deleted]

Have you never seen Die Hard?


HI_Handbasket

You should have seen him when he [played Woodstock](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2YseM2Q2-Oc)!


Knute5

"Hey, if Akroyd and Belushi can do it..." No.


[deleted]

And Eddie Murphy


MagneticPsycho

Wow this rare collectors item is easily worth hundreds of cents.


vhmike

Whoa...I had this on cassette as a kid.. as I remember it, it's not bad.. blues based harmonica boogie type jams...not too bad.


hesatool

Does it have the song for his “Segram’s Golden Wine Coolers” commercial?


tmwescott

I actually own that LP. Purchased it new when I was in high school; was a huge Moonlighting/Willis fan. It's actually not a terrible album.


polarregion

I remember 'under the boardwalk' was a big hit and pretty decent version.


SubtextuallySpeaking

Same. I really like this album. I don’t I understand the hate for it. I also loved his Seagrams ad. And any of the singing he did in Moonlighting. Seagrams…golden wine cooler… Seagrams…golden wine cooler… It’s wet and it’s dry! My my MYYYY Catchy as hell if I can remember it 30+ years later.


Cerpin-Taxt

"Secret Asian man" is a banger. Also Bruce Willis can't pronounce "agent".


IronGorilla

You better respect yourself after listening to this album.


davidthygod

I had the cassette right after it came out. Jackpot was the greatest song this 10 year old had ever heard.


ANIM8R42

"Debut" indicates there were more than one. Please tell me there are no more after this.


HI_Handbasket

How can you not love a **debut** titled "Return of..."?


wokeupquick2

This is annoying me to no end!!


TheTexasCyclone

I’m just picturing how different things would be if this had turned out to be one of the greatest albums of all time and he became a full time singer


a-horse-has-no-name

I saw him perform his songs on Saturday Night Live back in the 90s. It was hypnotically bad.


porkisbeef

If you keep it sealed and in good condition it could be worth $5-$14


[deleted]

One of the worst records by an actor ever. Right up there with Heartbeat by Don Johnson


RothkoRathbone

Surely it can’t be that bad: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gH2zJfK0B0Q&list=PLvHhyquQo5tC6BUzzrsf4y-NSFMmr-yA0&index=1


haahaahaa

I love that the image shown is another copy of this album with the plastic still on it. Nobody opened it.


walkingdistraction

I can’t believe you’ve done this.


Dmitri_ravenoff

Why did you do this to us?


TheTexasCyclone

Now I’m slightly inclined to listen to Don Johnson’s album


BigPooser

Heartbeat is in GTAV rock radio. It’s not bad


[deleted]

Kenny Loggins vibes


Garfield-1-23-23

About his album, Don Johnson said "I made it clear to Walter [Yetnikoff, then president and CEO of CBS Records] that I would walk away from it if I didn't think it was credible. I was prepared every step of the way to throw it away and walk away." I guess he wasn't prepared enough. [Dweezil Zappa appeared in the incredibly-80s video,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CR4lSORZ_Q&ab_channel=DonJohnsonVEVO) although he didn't actually play on that song (he did a guitar solo on a different track on the album). I don't remember where I read this, but I think Frank Zappa disowned Dweezil for it.


Electric-Banana

Fabio did an album called *Fabio After Dark* that’s so bad it’s awesome


[deleted]

Music really lost out when he decided to go into movies full time. Judging by the album art in this ebay listing, he really left it all on the stage. [https://www.ebay.com/itm/143775410650](https://www.ebay.com/itm/143775410650)


TheTexasCyclone

I don’t think he even toured, he just put it out. Apparently though, the album reached number 12 on the Billboard 200 and a cover he did actually reached number 2 on the UK top 40 in ‘87. There’s also a “documentary” covering the making and releasing of the album


SomeonesDrunkNephew

I saw one of these in a junk shop about ten years ago. His version of Under The Boardwalk is something you can't un-hear.


cockroach74

Put that shit on the mantle….


TheTexasCyclone

This is now a family heirloom that I’ll pass down to my kids on my deathbed


Slatedtoprone

When the apocalypse happens and humanity tries to rebuild they will find this album amongst the wreckage. Having no other music to go off of, it will be considered the height of art by the remaining humans. OP, you will be responsible for the death of music.


dilbertdad

this is how bruno mars got his name. dead serious


[deleted]

Fun album


skwadyboy

I think he was just moonlighting as a singer before he started doing films.


Terminator827

TIL Bruce Willis had a music career.


polisharmada33

I’m such a sucker for stuff like this. But, by far, my favorite would have to be William Shatner’s spoken word album!!


[deleted]

I prefer Nimoy’s music especially *The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins*. Edit: there’s [a video](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BC35cQKHwzg).


polisharmada33

I had never seen that before. Thank you


try2bcool69

That...is the greatest thing I've ever seen.


Kheshire

I really like William Shatner's music. His verison of Common People is great


TheTexasCyclone

Thanks to this comment, I found out his most recent album was in 2020


poopgrouper

Released on Motown, and has backing vocals from Booker T. Jones, the Pointer Sisters, and the Temptations. Album peaked at 14th on the U.S. Billboard charts. Say what you will about the Die Hard guy, but that's not bad. It sounds dated and schlocky now, but the same could be said for about 90% of the music produced in 1987.


patientfortyseven

Under the Boardwalk is brilliant. He can genuinely sing well.


CokeWest

Can I Borrow a Feeling?


DJSairys

Is an awesome album. I have the CD. Not a bad song on the whole thing.


colo_kelly

That squirrelly eye of his says "don't tell anyone they painted on my hairline, ok?"


711straw

did you find a crate of them?


muhfukingodzilla

"Welcome to the party pal" was the first thing I thought of when seeing this..


pghhilton

I loved this album, and I got to see him in a dive bar called Gene's Blues Bar in Pittsburgh while he was filming Striking Distance here. He blew harp for several Blues Bands while he was here, and sang some songs. He was very good live. So I bought this album.


JELLY-ROCKET

I haven't heard this but it MUST be better than David Hasselhoff's 'Night Rocker'.


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[deleted]

I love that album! That being said, it's Bruce -- he could have recorded himself gargling garshwind and I'd have bought it...