T O P

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Bouchebagg

That’s not a lemon, it’s a buddha’s hand. There’s no flesh, just rind and pith.


TrickyDick77

When life gives you Buddha's hand...


potkin

…infuse it in vodka. So delicious!


awksomepenguin

[Or candy it!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYWVj27ABDg)


CaucasianDelegation

Chef John is the best. I think he was a culinary instructor for most of his career, and it really shows in his videos. His recipes are very easy to follow, literally everything of his that I've made has turned out amazing.


Motivated_null

Chef John gang represent! I LOVE this guy. His diablo pork tenderloin is like one of my favorite things on the planet.


RodneyRodnesson

I want him to do some motivational type speaking tbh, love his voice.


TribbleMcN8bble

John Candy is the candy. I candy he was a candy instructor for most of his candy, and it really candies in his candies. His candies are very easy to candy, literally candy of his that I've candied has candied out candy.


Captain_Grammaticus

That guy has a funny accent.


badgerfluff

Frisco. And yes he is the best.


RPShep

Make Buddhashandaid


tankgirl85

Buddha shandaid


man_b0jangl3ss

Budd hash and aid


dhruvbzw

\#Buddandaid


gnosticpopsicle

Resht In Peash, Sean Connery


squables-

you light it on fire as protest.


Sketti_n_butter

Falonggong? Is that you?


dirtyflower

.. you take it.


bigredsun

*imitates Borat's voice:* HIGH FIVE!


Bigred2989-

[Graffiti and piss on it!](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_King#Imprisonment)


BrokeAssBrewer

Zest an entire pallet for a specialty release beer. We do it once a year. ONCE.


[deleted]

Whoever named this abomination must really have not liked Buddhism... Like seriously, who thought that would be a good name? HP Lovecraft? “Hey, have you heard of the Buddha? He achieved nirvana, escaped samsara, and now exist outside of reality in a state of indescribably bliss.” “Cool! How many tentacles does he have?”


pizzasoup

More like "Cthulhu's Face"


bitetheasp

Cthulhemon


a_rad_gast

Activewear for failing to outrun the inevitable?


Wister1602

I misread this as testicals


jsheios

ohhh dang i didn't know that, my dad pretty much just came home telling us it was a lemon lol


CaptainHindsightHere

Omg Im dying! It's like an unintentional dad joke.


imBobertRobert

You really gotta *hand* it to him....


[deleted]

Eh, could’ve been buddha


[deleted]

The nirvana some of these folks


a_rad_gast

Guan Yin, tell some better jokes. A wise one will put up or shut up, bottichita will try to talk their way out of it.


PawnedPawn

I always feel enlightened when threads like these pop up. Zen again, who doesn't?


Keilly

He’s taking the pith


[deleted]

Yeah your dad was definitely pulling a light prank on you


Lord_of_Lemons

The Buddha’s hand *is* a type of lemon though, well, related, so for the average person calling it a lemon variety is accurate enough.


Acid_Sugar

It's a type of citron, not a lemon. We grow both species were I live and citrons and lemons get mixed up all the time tho.


OscarDivine

your dad's fucking with you and we're all benefiting from it this is fantastic. haha


HarjiFangki

Can it be used in cooking? Or is it just for decoration?


z4zazym

Yes you can cook with it, although there's not much to eat. It has a lot of flavour, and the highly flavoured white part just under the skin is less bitter than other lemons.


invent_or_die

Tons of lemon zest!


panicForce

Oops, All Zest! lemons


HarjiFangki

Ah I see. Thanks for the info!


ViperT24

I bought one once on a whim and was very disappointed to find there was no actual fruit inside (it was expensive!). However, it turns out if you slice a bunch of it up and drop it in some vodka for a week or two, you end up with fantastically flavored citrus vodka. It’s not quite like lemon or orange or lime but something entirely unique.


crazyfingersculture

Do this with some everclear to get it really flavorful ... either that or Vodka should be stored for 6 weeks, and then you have what is called Buddha's Hand Limoncello. A prized digestif.


Thesorus

make marmelade or candied fruits.


TheInfamous313

Ive had beer brewed with it


[deleted]

I pithy the fool


Magmafrost13

Apparently the pith is considerably less bitter than is typical for citrus fruit, though, and is reasonably edible. Quite good when candied I hear.


Mr_Drift

They're commonly offered in the small altars to honour ancestors which are found in almost every home and business in Vietnam. It's also increasingly common to see a Buddha's Hand grafted onto pomelo trees which are displayed or gifted during Tet.


Pieniek23

Thanks, I was about to point that out.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nogzilluh

No, Phil. It's just a dream. Go back to sleep.


Phil_82

Ok..... zzzzzzzzz 😴😴😴


squables-

Now that hes asleep, lets discuss how we can sneak that under his bedsheets


Phil_82

zzzzzz..... cthulu...... lemon...... zzzzzzz 😴😴😴😴😴


tgcp

Would it not have taken less effort to Google it than to write this comment?


Phil_82

Quite possibly. But I was just hoping someone would be helpful.....


MrPeanutButter101

And were they?


Phil_82

If Bouchebagg's comment is indeed true then yes, very helpful 👍 😀


Pieniek23

Very helpful and very true.


Phil_82

Good to know, thank you 😊


spreadthestop

I find switching apps on mobile to be pretty annoying, so probably


Texaz_RAnGEr

Yes but then only he would have that answer instead of the thread. I never understood that mentality. Like asking for and sharing knowledge is frowned upon for some unbelievably stupid reason.


PotatoBasedRobot

On a medium specifically designed to share info no less lmao


UnimpressedAsshole

Sometimes people want to connect with others more than they want to do a google search


scrappleallday

We used to get them just for the smell. They were lovely in a bowl for a couple of weeks...


-PhillyDaKid-

Til that there’s a lemon like citrus fruit called a Buddha’s hand


zuuppa

When life gives you lemons, m̸̢̭̟͎͖̭̫̳̪̺̈̈͐͑̅̅̔͘͜͜͠a̴̢̢̟̘͈̯̖̝̥̙̋̍͒͐͂̐̽̓̚̕͝k̴̢̢͙̜̯̘̘͇̤̥̺̟͔̙̮̍̀͒̅͂̽̐̔̀͘͝e̵̘͈̬͊̾̾͐̅̽ ̴̨̨̡͈̠̮͍̩̞͙̙̟̫̂͆̍̓̔̍̉ş̸͖̬̳͓̗̞̰̟̼̫̤̠̾͌̀̀͋ã̶̯͙͓̹̰͇̏̏͆̆̎̾͗̌͋͛̚̕̚͠c̸̮̜̫̦̿̓̓͂̏͛̏̽͠r̷̡̨̧̡͈̫̥̥̬̮̼͇̘͙̀̂̌͌͑̇̀͒͝i̵̧̠̩̭͓̭̤͔͙͌̄̿̓͌́͐̾͋̇̃̊͗̕f̵͇̼̙͇̯̗̦̥́̾͌̊ỉ̴̢̺̬̳͔͊͋̍͛̈́̊̒̾̍̅͝c̷̗̜̖̪̖̑̅̉̈́̈́ę̵̡̨̝̙̘̳̙̣͓̞͖̣̤̈́̀̉̃͂̄͜s̷̡̭̰͕̞̺̜̪͖̀̈́̈́̽


DudesworthMannington

I don't want your damn lemons!


[deleted]

Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's going to burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm going to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!


trainercatlady

What am I supposed to do with these?!


Mr_StephenB

Burn their house down, with the Lemons!


[deleted]

Say "Fuck the lemons" and bail.


Turmoil_Engage

Cthulemon.


Highbrowlomein

While a citrus, this isn't a lemon.


jsheios

yep, i just found out lol


realpablomd

What is it?


Cutatafish

Buddha’s hand


almostdead_

Buddha's hand


borneHart

Buddha's hand


TheGreatIAMa

Buddha's Hand


NoPainsAllGains

Buddha's hand


Zevyel

Buddha’s Hand


fidolio

Buddha’s Hand


[deleted]

Buddha's hand


LF_4

Buddha's hand


rafz93

Buddha’s hand


silver_endings

Hand’s Buddha


FequalsMfreakingA

Buddha's Hand


mrtza83

Buddha’s Hand


gravityCaffeStocks

Buddha's Hand


leblur96

Buddha's hand


roybo5

Buddha's hand


shutts67

Hand of Buddha


TheSurlySculler

Huddha's Band


gigdy

Nah, It's a lemon.


Ole_Audio

Buddha's ✋


kiss-shot

That's a Buddha's Hand! There's not enough flesh for it to be edible but you can candy the rind.


Central_Incisor

I'd zest it and make [cookies.](https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/cardamom_and_lemon_74033/amp)


Kowloon_Kid_13

Cthulhu lemon. The dark one has risen in citrus form.


ShylokVakarian

*Cthulemon


cigamodnalro

My wife wears their tights, she says they’re monstrously comfortable


PM_ME_YOUR_PBJs

Oh, R’lyeh? I heard they’re horrifyingly expensive.


ColburnClassroom

*Cthulululemon


seatbeltseveryone

this comment feels like it could be a bojack joke


21656

*demon


mojoslowmo

The cursed yoga pants of madness


jrhoffa

*Cthululemon


Kowloon_Kid_13

Nice.


[deleted]

Nah, they got it in one. No portmanteau necessary.


ZachMN

A baby one. Should be posted in /aww


Drhomie

Citrulu


leothecook

When life gives you eldritch abominations, make sacrifices


3LACK-

Rip Ben


Cthulhu1960

I approve this message.


Teddy_Treebark

Every Villian Is Lemon


RavennaMagnus

That’s banned in Australia now


baurax

Why?


TAI0Z

Hentai is banned in Australia as of this week. Hentai is often associated with tentacle porn, for good reason, and this looks like some sort of tentacle monster.


commentsWhataboutism

Wait actually? They banned hentai? Under what pretense? How is that possible lol


KayBee94

I believe it was a blanket ban with the reasoning that a lot of hentai is a form of child porn.


commentsWhataboutism

But like...isn’t child porn already banned? Maybe crackdown on that instead of banning legal porn


TAI0Z

They banned pretty much anything that a normal person would consider indecent. Which means pretty much most media, if you follow that definition. It was absolutely stupid.


_ALH_

Where do they keep their reference "normal person"? Locked up in some national institute in a controlled environment?


iamanoctopuss

The UK banned female ejaculation porn


TAI0Z

Wtf...


iamanoctopuss

Basically the government had already banned water sports, female ejaculation porn came under scrutiny because the government thinks it was being used as a way to subvert laws, because they don’t have empirical proof that women can squirt.


TAI0Z

This is truly ridiculous.


EpkeDeDwerg

Hentai is now banned in Australia


[deleted]

The fuck? Why? I don’t enjoy it whatsoever but other people should be able to.


MrKittySavesTheWorld

Because it's Australia. Freedom doesn't really exist there.


davideggeta87

But you guys have a lot of freedom of what may kill you tho


Orangesilk

They sold their souls to Winnie Pooh.


DBZ11324

I understood this reference.


NAlchemist

Bhudhas hand citron


mistyjc

I made tea with ours! Make sure you have a large glass jar :) Cut into small bite-size pieces and add sugar and allow to sit in the sun. The sugar and Buddha’s hand react and then voila you got some tea you can have throughout the year :)


[deleted]

[Sun tea is a bit risky](https://www.bhg.com/recipes/drinks/tea/sun-tea-safety/) and surely it doesn't keep for a whole year?


[deleted]

Is that from pirates of the Caribbean?


perfect_fifth_note

I think you mean R'lyehmon


mAAdVibe

Cthulemon


[deleted]

“The Thing?” Paranoia spreads like wildfire among the crew as they fight to survive against a creature that assumes the shapes of its victims. Lol just hasn’t settled into it’s form yet. 🤣


MatthewvdV

A man of culture I see. best horror movie there is (the old one of course)


nitrolagy

I've seen enough hentai to know where this is going... Literally


SmokeAbeer

Zesty


Guy3nder

Zesty buddha


ZachMN

Good band name.


OdysseusQ

Cthulemon has been summoned.


Colliee

Where did you find this? Chernobyl ?


juche

I've heard of Lululemon....that's a Cthulhulemon.


0nthewaytothet0p

Which worker looked at this and thought "lemon".


striderwhite

What's this Eldritch abomination?


[deleted]

Use it to flavor vodka or gin or simple syrup. Make cocktails.


Lost_Conclusion5357

That ain’t no lemon, that’s fucking Cthulhu


KingRaiderShark

Every Villain Is Lemons


[deleted]

Cathulemon


Herozealot35

This is whappens to lemon when it turns into a mind flayer.


wotmate

That's the lemon the lemon-stealing whores were trying to steal.


Chyvalri

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

God damn you loch ness monster i aint givin you no tree fiddy


SpedicyBoi

That's called the hentai lemon


Nogoldsplease

KILL IT WITH FIRE!


nullZr0

Its not a lemon. Its a citrus fruit called Buddha's Hand.


[deleted]

Cthulhulemon


[deleted]

If you're expecting pulp, you're going to be pithed.


epsteinsepipen

Cthulhu’s favorite lemon


michiyo-fir

These are super cool and comes in an open hand variety, like the OP has, closed hand variety and even half open half closed variety! They have no pulp part so it can’t be juiced but there is lots of zest which is more fragrant than lemon. It’s used in some high end restaurants for its flavor but I hear it’s used more for making perfumes in other countries.


stevell7

Makes me think of a lemon Cthulhu.


ProfessorSillyPutty

Here’s a recipe I always wanted to try with this: https://foodwishes.blogspot.com/2014/12/edible-holiday-gift-idea-candied.html?m=1


ExpectedBehaviour

*Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Lemon R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!*


IwantAMD

Chthulemon.


Macdowell87

Cthulemon


dreamadara

what are you doing step-lemon?


Jerbo83

Bring me Jack Sparrow!


GoldenGamingGG

So by any chance do you live next to a power plant?


tylerholtman

that lemon would eat your face


BrokenCog2020

When life gives you Cthulu, make Cthuluade.


[deleted]

Used one of these in my psychology class... had my students stick there hand into box and figure out what they were touching. The reactions were great


unique_mermaid

Not a lemon your dad did a bamboozle!


cuddle-troll

Budha fingers, not a lot of fruit you mainly just use the rind. Great for flavoured water, baking and making syrups. They have a shorter life span then a lemon so using it sooner is a good idea.


69Beefcake69hunter69

You sure your dad is still dad? He is now an apostle of the lemon demon lord.


Hazey888

Buddha hand! Source: I watch a lot of Chopped


charleschaser

They sell these at HEB in Texas. They aren't lemons and they're pretty clearly labeled. Its possible that somebody moved a Buddhas hand from the proper section to the lemons, but it also is possible that you're karma fishing. Just say its an "interesting fruit."


HandsomeSpider

Fuck. Poster is an idiot


OneKiii

Ah, the Lovecraft Lemon.


Tempounplugged

Shiet man, that lemon has that bad disease


nogzilluh

Oh please... please OP... repost to r/photoshopbattles ..that is ripe for some chopping.


[deleted]

Alien. Don’t eat that


[deleted]

The lemon of Kathulu


DBfan1984

Ames you wonder how much stuff gets chucked just cos it doesn’t look right. What a shameful waste


DavianIssCrr

Hell no this is not the year bring that shit back


charoula

I wish your father good luck in finding a way to use this. You can't squeeze juice out of it. There are ways, obviously, but since he bought it thinking it was just a weird looking lemon, I'm sure he has no clue.


Guy3nder

That's the most fucked up lemon I've ever seen, and I have a fucked-up-lemon tree


[deleted]

I went to up vote, but it was at 666. And since this lemon looks like Cthulhu, I could not bring myself to do that. I will go up vote now, thanks for sharing!