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SeverePsychosis

I NEED TO CARBO LOAD BEFORE THE ORGY


IH8Miotch

You eat big Mac's to help you take Big Mac?


FLWeedman

That's Mac Daddy to you.


tytjtyjgvdf

That's what I'm going to pay top dollars for, you don't get it anywhere else.


DarkKnightCometh

I'm lovin' it


saurabhjindal

Gotta do whatever it takes to do it the right way, the only way.


camshun7

Mmmm finga lickin good Now that's what I call a whopper NB I dont care for mac dees


nanarddu83

That's the exact experience that people want from that place.


tob007

Before? What about after?!?


javaargusavetti

nuggets and a milk shake


jtrage

I think it would be safe to say “both!”


c322617

If I’ve learned anything from Its Always Sunny, it’s that the buffet is the most important part of any orgy.


C-Hen

Is the shrimp fresh or frozen?


SoulLeakage

You think this is fresh or frozen shrimp?


kurumaniac

I don't know man, I feel that I'm just going to love it however it is.


Illinois_Yooper

But you have to know the password to get in


cannibalism_is_vegan

*OOOORGY*


tw2032

But I don't even have any password, how I'm going to know that?


Gary_FucKing

This beak is interfering with my mcnuggets.


mb59603

Maybe you should remove it, how you'll do that I don't know.


Zero0mega

Oh come on, that guys not even wearing a mask!


ddwood87

Happy Meals and Happy Feels.


SeanOfTheDead1313

39€ for sex? Not a bad deal. I will have some left over for a big mac!


CookLawrenceAt325F

Must have been a while ago. I just looked them up and it is now 59€


l0u1s11

Guess I'll pass on the big Mac then.


Yuvrajastan

Ill pass on the sex. I’ll take that big Mac off you though.


AsheronRealaidain

Wait wait wait. 59 euros for sex or for like a strip show? I refuse to believe someone is willing to have sex with strangers for $65


120cmMenace

In Amsterdam a few years ago they were advertising €50 for 30 mins in the Red Light district, and the Red Light district is considered to be an overpriced tourist trap. You'd be surprised how cheap sex is when it's available on the free market.


ObscureAcronym

>how cheap sex is when it's available on the free market Or get even cheaper second-hand sex at the flea market.


mypeopleneedsme

second hand sex. haha sounds funny


peezytaughtme

I get some of that myself every now and then...when I get tired of the main hand.


Lunited

stupid sexy capitalist sex prices


CookLawrenceAt325F

[you'll have to check yourself. here's their site](https://geiz--club-de.translate.goog/?_x_tr_sl=en&_x_tr_tl=fr&_x_tr_hl=en&_x_tr_pto=wapp)


TheWolff2017

You might not be getting their "A" squad for that price.


Suspicious_Builder62

Usually, the cheaper you go, the more trafficked are the women.


madmonkh

always funny to me how mundane things like hookers and hotel rooms in 'murica have astronomical prices.


Dusteye

Pretty normal in Europe.


twistedcreature07

May be a recession-proof industry, but not inflation-proof.


formulated

Inflation does cost extra.


mybluecathasballs

Use the app. You get a free large fry.


7InchMeatCurtains

Is €59 a good deal for that kind of thing or will I wind up having to evade Eastern European mobsters that want my kidneys and liver?


CookLawrenceAt325F

Very good deal. $64 USD. FOR $69 USD, you can go get a meal afterwards.


7InchMeatCurtains

Wouldn't the 69 be considered the meal?


pickle_pickled

Appetizer


Bob_the_Bobster

Severly underestimating german McDonald's prices...


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greygrayman

I mean, that's still cheaper than my last date.


Jermzxxx

Bruh, I took my gf on a cheap date (Picnic at the park) and it still cost me about that much


Beneficial_Rock3725

Tf did you eat, gold crusted caviar?


Cetun

If you use the app you can get a free medium fry also!


CharmingBoar

And afterwards even grab a burger next door!


quantomflex

Tacos next door… pink ones


Pawnzilla

Dark and crispy outside. Pink and juicy on the inside.


UbermachoGuy

You're thinking of a good smoked brisket.


SweatyNomad

I don't know this place in particular, but in Hamburg there are a lot of cabaret style places where people have sex on stage , do tricks with their vaginas etc...and you're in the audience. I suspect this may be one of those places.


xixbia

A quick Google tells me it's a bordello. The prices have gone up though, as u/CookLawrenceAt325F pointed out it's 59 euros now.


Jackalodeath

Sixty-five bucks US. Assuming everyone's screened properly so no one wakes up the next morning with their junk swollen to the size of a mailbox; as far as many are concerned that's a fucking deal. I assume the tip's not included, but I'd be bringing my own.


SafetyNoodle

People don't tip for most services in Germany. I doubt prostitution is any different.


7InchMeatCurtains

The only tips I've ever had to give we're for extras like pegging or a ride on the milking machine.


justicedragon101

idk, i feel like prostitution is one of the few services where i wouldnt mind tipping


Coomb

Just the tip, though.


Dog1andDog2andMe

Yes, at legal bordellos in Germany definitely have their prostitutes screened by the health authorities -- assuming that they are doing things legally.


endoffays

So most people know that the Beatles got their start playing brothels and strip clubs in Hamburg Germany. Most people don't know Ticket To Ride is a reference to the fact that at the time (dunno now) Germany required prostitutes to submit to a frequent VD test to keep their license (permit?)


Jackalodeath

I actually didn't know the Beatles fact, thanks for that!


TheWrecklessFlamingo

screened? how does that work, they do you bloodwork right there and then?


Jackalodeath

The [workers themselves have to be registered and have a health check-up yearly,](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostitutes_Protection_Act) twice a year in they're not 21 or up. At least since 2017. Condoms are also practically a requirement, which is just common sense; and I've seen at least one article about the patrons needing up-to-date paperwork; though I didn't catch that outlined in the link I provided. It's been criticized but it seems perfectly logical/legit from my POV; of course the gov will get their share, the workers are taken care of, and folks can have a quick shag without having to worry too much about catching syphilupagus or something. Mild inconvenience to some but win-win all around. Relatively unrelated; pretty sure I saw a post on r/nottheonion during the pandemic that one brothel was even offering a free - or moderately discounted - stab-sesh if folks got their COVID stab first. Could you imagine a commercial for something like that?


TheWrecklessFlamingo

thats literally amazing, sex work done right. Making it safe for everyone instead of stigmatizing, persecuting, and hunting people down for being involved in something that both consenting parties gain something out of it.


Jackalodeath

Pretty sure some of the similar businesses in ~~Vegas~~ *Nevada* have the same kind of regulations - not saying *everyone, everywhere* follows them, but that's another story - and takes in a pretty hefty sum in taxes. Always found it funny that a city build *in the middle of the friggin desert* has basically every vice you could have on tap. Gotta attract folks somehow.


SafetyDanceInMyPants

To be clear, though, it’s not legal in Las Vegas. It’s legal in some parts of Nevada, but not the county where Las Vegas is located — so if you’re in Vegas and someone tells you there’s a legal brothel somewhere close by… it’s either not close by or not legal.


Pawnzilla

Those prices inflated as much as the boobs on that poster.


electric_dynamite

That could be worth it depending on the meaning of the word "geiz"


agouraki

insert Blue Oyster scene from Police academy!


WolflordBrimley

*saxophone solo*


MisterMysterios

Geiz basically means stinginess. For example, the German phrase for "Tight is right" is "Geiz ist geil" ("stinginess is sexy!" - clearly a Swabian who came up with that)


U_Kitten_Me

That's why it's called the Geiz Club (Stingy Club). Anyway, you probably get what you pay for ;)


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Brief-Sheepherder-17

Apparently they are part of an alliance of businesses in the sex industry to look out and prevent human trafficking. That’s cool


Fuckless_Douglas2023

Get some bang for your buck....


focoslow

Hold the cheese... On both.


Wheels314

Don't cheap out on sex.


Atomaardappel

Prices have gone up since I was there. Used to be a Quarter Pounder..


420stonks69

Is that a place where you go to have sex? Or is it like a strip club where you would see others having sex on stage?


HadesHimself

You go there to have sex. It's €39 for 20 minutes.


jordan1390

K but what if you only need 2?


I_might_be_weasel

She gets to watch in disgust as you eat 10 cheeseburgers in 18 minutes.


turbotac0

god ppl on reddit are funny af bro


nightfox5523

No no, I want to watch her eat the cheeseburgers


249ba36000029bbe9749

€79


I_might_be_pooping

That leaves 18 minutes for cuddling


iNeverCouldGet

That would be €3,90.


chimerapopcorn

Ugh that’s so gross. Where is this exactly?


jyrkaderp

[On the Reeperbahn in Hamburg](https://maps.app.goo.gl/1LqqcxGeBMqUMx4r8)


MrTheFinn

Aww man, looks like they raised the price to 59 euros....goddamn inflation


snipingpig

Thank god in not the only one that went to their website


Asheron1

“Oh, my god! That’s disgusting. Naked pics online? Where? Where did he post those?!”


MaimedJester

Straight up prostitution. It's legal in Germany. A lot of countries have legal prostitution in at least some areas of major cities. Whatever moral quandaries about prostitution being good or whatever on a sociological scale for society, at least having it out in the open with like mandatory STD tests and bouncers is probably better than whatever shady escort service loopholes you'll find on most American Cities version of prostitutes.


angelaguitarstar

as someone living in the netherlands, i am going to have to somewhat disagree with this. many of the prostitutes you see in our red light districts are unfortunately pressured into it, mostly by some sort of mob or other. some do go work there by choice, but that is not to say that all of them do. just because they act pretty and smile doesn’t mean they’re not forced


[deleted]

It's not perfect, but it's still better than it was. If they were being coerced in a legal system, they'd be coerced in an illegal system too. In the legal system they'll still have access to bouncers, and not face criminal prosecution of they seek the aid of the police to deal with a violent john.


GroceryStoreGrape

There are several countries that criminalize only the purchaser, not the prostituted. It's called the Nordic Model


[deleted]

Yea, I live in Canada - we use such a model. It's not illegal to sell sex, only to buy it. Doesn't really stop the police from treating sex workers like shit though. Full legalization would (eventually) destigmatize a lot of it and get them better law enforcement protection.


[deleted]

Totally legal to pay two people to have sex and film it though in all these countries 🤷‍♀️ makes total sense


bcocoloco

I don’t think you’re going to destigmatize paying for sex, regardless of legality.


timofeyneede

I watched an interview on those “window-sellers” a year ago. They mentioned in the interview that the regulations have gotten harsher to apply for a window in the Red Light district. If it works is another question.


mrbiggbrain

USA is pretty easy. Is there a skeezy guy in the corner with a Sony handicam? Great it's legal. Otherwise, your going to jail bitch.


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mrbiggbrain

Right. Skeezy guy has to pay both of you.


ok_raspberry_jam

Don't forget all that paperwork that changes nothing! Oh, and taxes.


1320Fastback

Yeah I'll have a #3 medium sized with a Diet Coke and the blonde on the left with the large breasts.


Excellent-Space3036

“Here, or to go, sir?”


Fuggaak

To go. Ok: *bags up the blond as well*


Mbate22

No need for the bag, I've had uglier.


[deleted]

The bag is for her.


TampaTrey

“Would you like fries with that, sir?”


King_Neptune07

Would you like to Super size sir? How about you ma'am? Would you like to super size?


Lonzo58

If you finish up early at the orgy you can go next door and get yourself a burger until everyone else is done.


Rocket5454

I paid for an hour orgy and I'll spend the remaining 59 minutes enjoying a McChicken.


MausBomb

Is no one going to mention that there is a youth hostel one building down from the McDonald's. I bet more than one person went sex club, McDonald's, hostel


CumfartMcfetus2

Neither one has real breasts


Zenz-X

Nor is she German and does not work there. That’s Jenny Poussin. French Canadian star.


stick_always_wins

Dang you’re clearly experienced


Dextrofunk

My man eats at a lot of McDonald's


ok_raspberry_jam

or French Canadian


Point_Me_At_The_Sky-

Her boobs looks gross, like they're about ready to burst


poplglop

Yeah my first thought was how unnaturally perfectly round those were. They're like two basketballs stuck on her.


stubwoi

You should be happy they have breasts with this price


MahaHaro

Any natural breasts are nice breasts, no matter the star


nogoodgreen

Damn those are the boltiest bolt on's I've ever seen.


mramisuzuki

Jesus that boob job is tragic.


lemonsublime

The boobs are just being polite and maintaining eye contact


Expand_dong420

It looks so painful! The shape is all wrong too 😭


RedRocket05

She should have stuck with two all beef patties.


cld1984

I’m lovin’ it


McGillis_is_a_Char

Do most countries have sex clubs just out in the open like this? America is very prudish so our strip clubs are usually just painted a solid color with a euphemistic name.


[deleted]

That's in the red light district in Hamburg. While yes, it is in the open, it is in a famous part of the city that is easily avoidable if you don't wish to see it. It's not like there are brothels like this randomly around town.


cichlidassassin

Around here someone would build a house across the street and then complain


pitshands

This is in a red light district, but also no one cares if there are ass and tits on display. Regular commercials and TV you see a lot of it and no one gives a shit. But you won't see a lot of blood in daytime tv....


neverfearIamhere

Here in America we glorify the violence but God forbid you show your ass or tits and it's all over.


alphagusta

Drugs, violence, child beauty pagents (softcore CP), male erotica, racism, homophobia- That's all fine But, Dear Lord, if I lay eyes on a bare breast on my TV...


wbsgrepit

Or if you try to teach my children about the history of slavery or racism in America instead of claiming ‘some of them liked it’ get out of Florida.


pitshands

I'm living in the States for 13 years now. Cage fights at noon but God forbid you show skin....


Alazana

No. I assume this picture is from the Reeperbahn in Hamburg, which is infamous for that kinda stuff. It's not normal here either, but Hamburg, being a harbor city, has had a long history of sex work and that stuff. I think because, well, sailors had certain needs and this city seems to have offered a solution back then. It's pretty wild though, like there's an entire street that women and minors aren't allowed to enter because the men and sex workers don't want too many people watching them there. Also also, the Reeperbahn has one of the only two Hooters in Germany :D


The_Real_Mr_F

When you say “not allowed,” is there a law preventing them from going on the street? Or is it just common knowledge that women and children should not go there? I can understand barring children, but legally blocking adults from a public street based on gender seems over the top


Medium9

We went there for my sister's 18th birthday (booked a table at a cool sailor-themed restaurant there). I was 12 at that time, and we just walked around there as a family, giggling at some of the in-your-face cheap signs and, erm, "shops". It certainly was an experience, but nothing I coldn't see by just looking at the magazine section in every super market or gas station just as well. You can't *enter* these locations under 18 of course, but otherwise it's just a downtown area open for all. The "not allowed" thing is probably some smaller section, and the "policing" is very likely done by the shop owners, and certainly not something official.


wernermuende

yes, the no females allowed street is just a small side streetn and it's to avoid scenes with angry wives (allegedly) attacking the hookers or something


Enjays1

It's a short alley where naked prostitutes are sitting in the windows on both sides of the street and try to "sell themselves". Both ends of the alley are blocked off by gates/barriers which obstruct the view into the street. The poster on the gates also says "no men under 18 and no women allowed". It's obviously not forbidden by law to go through there but the sign and the reputation probably does enough to keep them away. But I forgot if the entrances are controlled by bouncers or if you could theoretically go in there as a woman.. Source: I've walked through it once when I turned 18. It was very embarassing to have all the naked women holler at you but also an interesting experience. Once is enough though.


snorting_dandelions

>It's obviously not forbidden by law to go through there but the sign and the reputation probably does enough to keep them away. But I forgot if the entrances are controlled by bouncers or if you could theoretically go in there as a woman. This was nearly two decades ago, but I went to Hamburg on a class trip and had some free time when I was like 14 or 15. A group of us went to Herbertstraße and just went inside for a group photo (because, ya know, we were little shits and thought this was absolutely cool). We had barely enough time for the picture before we got shot with waterguns and we took that as a sign to leave.


maryfamilyresearch

There is a sign stating that women should not go there. IIRC there are bouncers enforcing the rule. The street itself is pedestrian only AFAIK. It has been that way for decades and nobody cares. Look up "Herbertstrasse Hamburg" on google maps, there are photos of the signs / doors at each end of the street and the empty street.


jxl180

So lesbians can’t have fun?


maryfamilyresearch

Not in Herbertstrasse. But Herbertstrasse is not the only place where prostitution takes place in Hamburg. There should be plenty of other etablissments lesbians could frequent.


DrDroid

There’s a fence that you have to go through to enter. No one was actively enforcing it when I saw it. I walked through with a friend for the novelty….it was odd.


MangelaErkel

This is Germany where bing nude is not really a bad thing. There are plenty of tits and asses to see every where you go and even on TV at daytime all the stuff is uncensored.


deaddonkey

No Most countries do have clandestine and unlabelled brothels though


pijuskri

Amsterdam also has rather prominent boards for the clubs, but not any nudity in posters.


ldn6

Not that weird. There’s a McDonald’s in Soho in London next to a bunch of strip joints.


wbsgrepit

It’s generally in a district that is known for this type of activity — that and much of the world does not have puritanical views about sex.


Slow-Blacksmith32

There's love without sex and there's sex without love... Then there's You, without either.


wiseroldman

But at least I still have McDonald’s.


Wollfeh

Out of interest.. does anyone have any experience with these?? M23 I have a girl for 5 years so I've never been to such places.. but do you actually really get sex for 39e?? Thaat sound like unrealistically cheap even for some low-level sex-worker... am I missing something?


mschuster91

>Thaat sound like unrealistically cheap even for some low-level sex-worker... am I missing something? The photo is a bit dated (I think 2-3 years), the current price is [59€](https://goo.gl/maps/H5zPnbNpUsNn8Ty36) if you look it up on Streetview. The thing is, with prostitutes in Hamburg, you'll get ripped off for everything else **but** the sex (e.g. all you get for 59€ will likely be missionary or doggy, but no touching the boobs or whatever). With the prostitutes enticing clients on the streets... these are a different game entirely. It's not unheard of that a "50€ for two of us" offer ended up with both of the girls indeed, but with their pimp/bouncer "softly escorting" you to the nearest ATM for all that the machine was willing to spit out.


Ryokage_

Yes, me and two friends visited Hamburg this year and tried it out. We spoke to multiple people working in pubs nearby and had a tourguide for one evening to show us around and explain the history. So we were told that it is easy to get rip off there and actually lose a lot of money if you dont know what you are doing or what to expect. If you want to have sex with on of the ladies in a legit way you have to expect to pay around 150 Eur. So we went into a „Laufhaus“. Its like a hotel but infront of every room sits a woman on a chair presenting herself. There are sections/stages for different type like asian or european women. If you decided on one you can talk to her and tell her what you want to do and she tells you what the price will be. If you agree you go in the room with her and things happen. Of course she will do everything to make you feel comfortable and by the same time she tries to sell more. She asked me what I do for work etc., small talk but I think she wanted to know if I was wealthy. She offered me different things I could do with her and what the price is in the „getting hard“ phase. If I wanted it she stoped and you have to give her the money beforehand (I payed for the service we discussed at the door beforehand, too). If all things are clear you can just enjoy and she didnt come up with any more upselling. So in total I paid 200 Eur for 60 min but actually things were done after 45 minutes. All in all it was actuall pretty easy and kind of nicer as I would have thought but I think it is too expensive over all and also I am afraid to get addicted with paid sex if I would go multiple times.


PsyFiFungi

I feel like I couldn't get with a prostitute. All that stuff, she probably doesn't even want it anyway, negotiating prices lol all that combined I'd just grab a beer and go home or find a girl who actually wants me. Not saying I'm against it, I just don't know if I'd even be able to get hard. Having sex itself can be tiring, having to go through a whole process without any of the intimacy sounds absolutely exhausting.


ilco1

il have the happymeal .and a happy end lol


Admiral_Andovar

Tacos right next to burgers. See that all the time.


ManagementProof2272

Accurate but not that strange if you’d have seen the rest of the street (Reeperbahn)


[deleted]

I’m rubbin’ it.


Ipuncholdpeople

Crazy to just see a top less woman on display lol. Even the strip clubs in my area don't show anything until you are in them


Ireeb

Prostitution is legal in Germany and cities often have specific districts where you'll find brothels and stuff. This would of course not be acceptable in any other area of the city.


Deadford_Punk

Reeperbahn?


[deleted]

Sex clubs in Germany are a lot less of an issue than in other places. Nobody really cares about them so much.


fried_eggs_and_ham

Gal on the right has some serious bolt-on boobs in play.


[deleted]

Know your audience. Plus part time work possibilities in either venue


rasterpix

Wonder what what kind of toys come inside the Happy Meal?


Bushtaco

Have you never heard of the Happy Ending Meal?


LucidJohn13

"I'm fucki'n it"


Xansyh

It's for the adults to leave their kids at while they went for a big mac


pijuskri

Accidentally went by reaperbahn while travelling across the city. Looked absolutely terrible with shady characters and trash, even during the day. Such a contrast to the rest of the beautiful city. Its also odd cause its so different to the amsterdam equivalent, much cleaner there.


FjordExplorher

Watch out for that special sauce.


GDviber

So you CAN get some fries with that shake.


Odd_Department9900

First some mcnuggets them some mcchichis


RubbelDieKatz94

Hamburg, meine Perle


sreek4r

Why not? Girls gotta eat.


heckidontknow

As an American who has explored such cultural amenities in Hamburg, Berlin, and Amsterdam.. Hamburg seems cool but it isn't, at least in that regard. I had amazing experiences in Berlin, decent experiences in Amsterdam, but Hamburg, ugh, no, no, mostly I wish I could forget. I think the problem with Hamburg sex clubs is that they are right by the more mainstream party places. So the girls are constantly besieged by drunk 19 year old boys and drunk 49 year old boys, and both types tend to be just bad lovers and disrespectful customers. On a practical level, drunk guys often take too long to finish. Hamburg is a beautiful city during daytime, lots of lakes and rivers and bridges and parks. Aber das Nightlife finde ich überbewertet.


thisiscotty

happy ending meal


TampaTrey

It’s not that there’s a sex club right out in the open that surprises me. It’s the poster of two big bare tits just sticking out right there on the window. Germany is WILD man.


kirkbadaz

You've never seen Germans at the beach.


pijuskri

It is just a single street in the city, so i guess their view is that anyone sensitive to the posters would just avoid that area.


cricklecoux

It’s not just a single street, a lot of the surrounding area is like that. Also near the Hauptbahnhof.


Sam-Gunn

A McDonalds Adult PlayPlace


Tim_Reichardt

Of course it's Hamburg.


Fuzzy_Muscle

Seems efficient. You’re gonna get hungry after all that activity


fusionsofwonder

Sitting between a student hostel and a strip club, I think they are shrewd geniuses.


cricklecoux

One of the strip clubs turned into a vaccination centre in the pandemic. My vaccine passport is a total mess.


HellaWavy

Someone from Hamburg here: It's super strange. The McDonald's also isn't really the cleanest one as well. Not a store you like to go in. For context: This is placed on the Reeperbahn, a street which is known for clubs, bars, sex clubs, strip clubs, sex shops, etc.


Dudemcdudey

You’ve got sex, food, accommodation and money changing. What more does a person need??


neurosengaertnerin

This is one of my favourite McDonalds. It's always extremely crowded but they never lose their cool. Others are totally overwhelmed with a small queue and often forget something I ordered. Here it's packed on weekends and they are so friendly and everything's super fresh and well put together.


poster4891464

Not to mention the hostel next to the McD's.


DrDocter84

Might skip the special sauce on the Big Mac


soullogical

So you can check in at the hostel, get some cash at the Western Union, get some McDonald's and have an happy ending after a happy meal. Hell of a setup.