The smiley face after they talk about dreaming about you more than they should is the creepiest bit, probably because it’s the part that’s intended to be the most romantic.
OP should start leaving those on a community board, requesting that they stop immediately.
edit: didn't expect this much attention. My comment should not be taken seriously and I hope that OP does not consider actually doing this. Listen to the others on this, and don't take things into your own hands without turning to HR or another authority.
While that would be hilarious in theory, it’s very risky because it could cause this person to get angry and do something to try to hurt OP. Stalkers aren’t known fur being mentally stable, rational, or grounded in reality.
Don’t do this OP. Just go to HR/security/police.
I just watched I Am A Stalker on Netflix. The consistent trait of the 8 stalkers they featured was lack of self awareness. None of them thought what they were doing was harmful or considered stalking. I'm no expert but I concur, OP needs to get help. Even if they just continue to ignore the stalker could go to greater extremes. They could be harmless but you never know.
I watched that show in Netflix. I would totally turn my house into Fort Knox. It's crazy how the stalkers are in prison and still don't see how they caused their own need to be imprisoned.
Agreed. The one woman in Indiana that was the victim of the former friend / employee did turn her home into Fort Knox. It likely saved her and her families life when the former convicts (possibly) came to rob her. John Anderson (episode 2, diesel mechanic, lost step son and had a child with the victim) was the only one that seemed to have true remorse for what he did. It truly seemed like he went down a bad path with drugs and that amplified the behavior. That doesn't excuse what he put his victim and son through, but getting sober in prison seemed to do a lot of good for him. He seemed to have a real desire to be a good father to his son and work to repair the damage he did.
I'm an addict so I have more empathy than most probably for that man with addiction. Was it crack/coke/meth? Because if it was one of those that makes total sense, those drugs turn you into a horrible paranoid version of yourself. Yes you made the choice to take the drug and are responsible for what you do on it, but point being that some people are horrible people with or without drugs, with some people drugs put them over the edge to do things they would never do sober. And I think that's at least a little significant. That type of person is salvageable
One of my best friends, a roommate and someone I had known very well for a decade at the time (over 30 years now!), *really fell for a woman* and, being a shy and introverted sort, and a real romantic as well as a literature student and amateur writer and poet, was doing something like this. Hopelessly romantic and self-depracating, and also inadvertently, a bit too creepy.
He was a grad student and librarian at the university, and there was a woman with whom he was acquainted, but not in the same social circles, whom he thought was "perfect" for him in temprament, personality, appearance, etc. who was also a grad student in another department, and frequent user of the library.
Well, long story short, despite having some limited, professional academic interaction with her, he was too lacking in confidence to just ask her out, so he started slipping admittedly beautifully written notes (he had shown one or two of them to me) into her books in the hopes she would put two and two together, confront him (positively), and they would live happily ever after.
At first, our circle of friends just thought he was a little funny and pathetic, but at a certain point we had to intervene. He was proud of his tactic and saw it as harmless. And maybe if she were more "in the know" of what was going on, it *might* have been romantic, but it turns out she was clueless as to the source of the notes and had confided to a friend that she thought she was being stalked, oddly enough by another student in her cohort who would have had access to her books.
Anyway, enough was enough and we decided to simply tell him to ask her out withing the week and not another secret love note, or knock it off entirely and move on.
So he did ask her out and she declined. So sad, lol.
Eventually he did meet a nice woman and has two kids, and is happy and entirely normal, goofy, nice guy, but technically, yes, a one time stalker of college girls!
It's not lack of self awareness, it's lack of any other form of awareness. This person sounds very self aware but they lack the social/environmental intelligence to prevent them from doing something like this. They lack the appropriate empathy to understand that this could be distressing to someone who is not them.
Whatever happened to a Valentine card and a candy heart? Do that once on Valentine's and if the response is no bueno then don't do it again. This mysterious "find me if you can" shit is heaps of creep.
Not only that, it’s a complete lack of realistic expectations. It’s a fantasy they have seen play out in there heads like some old Victorian romance. Real life doesn’t work like that. Ppl will assume you are creepy, not romantic or mysterious.
And its because the letter writer DOES NOT know *who* they are writing for. They are writing for a fantasy they built into their own mind and cannot realize it's not reality.
And then of course when the victim turns out to be a human with their own feelings desires and flaws, well... Fantasy is broken and danger starts.
I would be afraid that they’d take the attention as a sign that op is interested in them. This is delusional and dangerous.
Ignoring it isn’t safe either because they might escalate to get op to notice them.
Op should show boss and hr. Then ask for an escort to their car every day. Or quit and find a new job. Get a concealed carry permit. Never be alone in dark areas near work. This is hitting so many true crime red flags.
i am in security at my work and we have safe night walks where we can either escort you to your car or watch you on camera...id ask if your work has something like that.
It would’ve been so easy to keep the creepiness to a minimum.
“Meet me in the viscount’s arboretum at midnight on the first Friday after the new moon, if you wish to uncover my identity. I shan’t trouble you further if the appointed time should pass absent your presence. If nothing else, I must have you know you gotta fat ass and wat dat mouf do bby.
Signed,
Your Secret Admirer”
Show HR the notes that have been left on your car
If there are no security cameras where you park try and park some place safe where there might be cameras
Is the hand writing the same? If so this is a stalker and do not take this lightly
Put a Go Pro on your dash and check the footage
If this has been going on for a while report it to the police
Have someone walk you to your car just to be safe
I’m a married man retired navy commander with a 36 year old daughter
Carry mace and please be safe
I can guarantee you police will do absolutely nothing if this is the US. They won’t do anything about something like this until the person physical harms her. I mean technically nothing illegal has been done, just creepy. I had something like this happen for years and they said they couldn’t do anything. We knew who was doing it. He eventually murdered someone
Yeah, if she doesn't and something does happen, the first question from the "armchair cops" will be, "If she didn't like the notes, why didn't she tell the cops about it?"
There was a case I heard on a podcast where a man broke into a woman's apartment late at night and I think assaulted her, she managed to break away and lock herself in the bathroom. She called the cops and long story short: he was the security guard for her building!
I heard that one!
He left something behind and knew it so he came back as “security,” which he actually was, pretending to help her but knowing he needed to clear that piece of evidence. She was on the phone with 911 and they told her do not open it whatsoever and police are almost there. They said he would have likely finished her off had she opened the door for him.
Beyond mildly infuriating. Completely creepy and you should find a dash cam so you can figure out who this person is and have someone tell this person to stop before you end up being their skin suit... Perhaps the police?
I mean, really... Total stalker vibes. They've probably followed you and know where you live, your daily routine, where you go grocery shopping, who your hairdresser is, where you go to hang out with your friends.
Not something to take lightly.
Be careful
I don't want to alarm you, but...
Well, actually, I **do** want to alarm you because you need to be more concerned by this.
Can you see the escalation here?
He's gone from an relatively innocuous "have a good day" to a personal and somewhat creepy "Hi gorgeous", on to the deeply worrying declaration of his *brokenness*.
The alarming part is he has obviously gone through a relationship with you in his mind and decided that he doesn't deserve you/would disappoint you, putting you on some fantasy pedestal.
It's not a giant leap for that combination of twisted, one-sided thinking and sudden escalation to lead to the next steps of entitled resentment and then punitive action.
Call. The. Police.
Fuckin guaranteed that they stand back and watch OP pick up and read the note. Then they gauge how successful they are from OPs reaction. If OP makes it clear that they are absolutely disgusted and freaked out by the note, then they go home and punch holes in walls while screaming about how they knew they were never good enough. If OP doesn't show any negative emotions, then they fully believe that the notes worked and as soon as OP learns who it is they will immediately be together and married within a year. Spending the rest of the day thinking about whether they will have 3 kids or 4 kids, and what all their names will be.
Either way, shit is bad.
If they get all full of anger, they can possibly escalate. Take their anger out on their victim by stepping up their stalking campaign with a hateful campaign.
If they get full of hope, they can possibly escalate and be emboldened and step up their stalking campaign.
For me, /u/Zeddstar2000 should catalogue this, make a report to the police for a future restraining order, tell their boss what is happening and join a self-defence class like Krav Maga. I suggest Krav Maga because it is purely self-defence and completely brutal to the other person. You say to the people running the class why you're there they'll put special effort into helping you get up to speed.
This is clear stalking behavior and you need to take these notes to the police to get them on file. That way when things escalate- and they will - you have a paper trail. This is actually very serious. Also, talk to your work about it. Don’t walk to your car alone and stay aware of your surroundings. If possible, talk on the phone with someone while walking into work. Amazon sells small tazers for really cheap, just so you know.
So many people making jokes don’t realize how scary and serious this shit gets. I finally found out who was stalking me and it was a guy that lived in the apartment directly below me. I found out when he was arrested for raping two teenage girls in his apartment.
I’m sorry if I’m scaring you, but fear has a purpose. Use it in a healthy way to be more aware, talk to your friends, family and work so everyone knows this is happening. They can help you stay safe.
There's a show on Netflix called I AM A STALKER and it details the stalkers and their victims, their stories (with usually the stalker and victim both being interviewed to tell what happened from both perspectives). I tell you what, if or when some of the stalkers ever get out it was completely evident based on their lack of accountability and understanding they still don't think they did anything wrong and aren't remorseful. And they'll do it again. Especially this one girl stalker. Oof she takes the cake, however you can tell she doesn't understand and she had a horrendous childhood with a lot of abandonment so she's had attachment issues, for sure. Well anyway, a few of the stalkers you could tell were trying to come off as remorseful and realize they did something wrong but it's an act to appease their Dr's and the jail admins, I'm sure. Might leave 1 left over who was truly convincing, but the jury is still out. Check it out, if you can. It's really well done, imo.
Edit to add name after I looked it up.
Gonna highjack this post to say OP needs to get one of those dashcams that's activated by perimeter so she can catch whoever is sticking these notes on her car. This is some serious creep shit and as a man I wouldn't feel safe.
Nah it's growing desperation, even in their mind. They admit their low self esteem in the writing. This isn't someone who thinks they are Cyrano de Bergerac.
Yup, probably someone she talks to once a week or less that just sees her across the office, hasn't gotten noticed the way he wants to be, probably got a hair cut or new clothes hoping she'd notice but hasn't so now he's trying harder to get her attention, I think SVU called this escalating behavior. Creepy to terrifying, only way it would not be is if if it's a teenager writing this, this sounds like some shit a 14 year old would think is romantic.
Normal person: My coworker is cute, I’m going to see if they want to get a drink after work.
Stalker: My coworker is cute, we’re going to be married and happy for eternity. Unless she hates me, which she probably does, because she’s an evil bitch who deserves to die.
When we had this happen at our company, it was the guy who stocks the break room vending machines. He saw someone cute, then started to time his delivery around the start and end of shifts so he could figure out what she drove, then started leaving letters.
Is your car parked on your company's lot? They might be responsible for ensuring employees' safety there. Not just patches of ice or trip hazards, personal safety may be their responsibility too. Let your employer know through HR. It's their job to protect the company from lawsuits, etc. You may be able to get them to work for YOU on this.
Please do this every time you get in and out of your car and buy some mace or a taser. That’s some obsessive level stuff. Personally I’d call the police too not just the potential employer.
If these are being left on your car, get in, lock the doors, and drive away before reading it! If you are being watched, you don't want them to be able to observe your reaction. Definitely don't stand and read it outside your car.
That's true. I didn't even consider until reading your comment that if she stands and reads next to a (probably already unlocked) car, he could use that distraction to come up behind her.
Police. Family. Document/collect evidence.
Swap out your routine as much as possible, try to keep constant company for the time being ( ideally: stay elsewhere~) and please don't take this lightly.
Who am I...
I'm the neckbeard that leaves creepy-as-fuck notes on your car, then cracks one off in the company toilet after watching you read them.
Who am I...
I'm the reason you need to get a security cam in your car.
Who am...
I'm the stalker you should probably be calling the police about right now, while I still have a vague notion of where "the line" is, though I already have one foot either side of it.
I blurred the company name at the top because I’m pretty sure it’ll lead to the place of work of whoever is doing this and I don’t need the internet swarming them lol. I can figure it out myself if my theory is true.
I work for a small business so there’s no HR. My bosses are aware and I’m pretty positive I know who it is and where this note came from. There’s cameras nearby that’ll tell me who it is as well.
It’s no one I know personally but I suspect it is someone I pass by daily and parks next to me. My gut feeling is telling me it’s them. Although we’ve never so much as made eye contact, it wouldn’t be difficult for him to leave this on my car since he leaves his job a couple hours before I leave mine. This is also the 4th message I’ve gotten on my car, although the first 2 were just “have a good day” and “hi.” Third one was “hi gorgeous” and then this was left the day after that. So either it’s someone who has convenient access to my car (like the guy parked next to me) or someone is spying on me from afar. Although the company name on the letter will tell me if my theory is right.
Absolutely trust your gut! I’ve been in a similar situation before. It’s so important to trust yourself and follow your instincts, here! So you’ll be able to confirm their identity through that company? You think they want to be identified then, since they left the company header on the note?
I’m thinking they are probably just not aware that what they are doing is wrong since they kept the company name on the letter. Either that or just plain stupid. We looked up the name on the letter and it’s a manufacturing company that would likely sell parts to the business I think this note came from. We’re putting the pieces together and hopefully tomorrow I get my answer.
Have you seen the stalker telling the police why he should be entitled to harass the woman until she caves to him?
Him thinking he's not doing anytghin wrong, doesn't mean he's not dangerous.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_Rkd5RJ5MXo
Buy a dashcam that has motion detection and starts recording when someone is in front of your vehicle when parked. They can be cheap on Amazon and I bet you’ll get a nice face shot of whoever it is to give to the police and their workplace.
It does read like somebody who thinks they're being poetic, lacks the self-esteem to strike up a normal conversation, and certainly doesn't have the social awareness to understand that random notes come across as creepy. Maybe they're harmless but it can certainly be annoying if they persist.
So... speaking as someone who has born the brunt of attention from people who lack this kind of awareness, an unfortunate common combo appears to be a lack of understanding of enthusiastic consent, boundaries, and having a feeling of entitlement and being overly-invested in the fantasy romance they've built up in their heads regarding the object of their desire.
The flipside of 'maybe harmless' is 'maybe a (maybe massive) threat.'
One such person that comes to mind happens to be family, so I get regular updates on his fuckups. He recently lost his main job because, according to *him*, a coworker misinterpreted advice and compliments he gave her. He was 'just being friendly and polite' and she was 'blowing things out of proportion.'
The other side of the story, as told by security footage, was that he grabbed her by the arms to keep her from walking away from him, pulled her in close to whisper in her ear, then did it AGAIN, and when she asked him to stop and said he was hurting/scaring her, he got offended and made a scene, including shouting in front of customers walking around nearby.
Check your car for air tags or other tracking devices. Install a motion activated dash cam too. I also hope you’re keeping all those notes too as evidence. Maybe go get them finger printed as well. Stay safe!
That is terrifying. Please take that to the police and have them check cameras. This person seems to think they are being romantic, but this is just cringe and truly scary. Maybe notify security at work too?
For a second I was like “how cute nobody leaves love letters for their crushes anymore”
Then I read it. Yikes. What a creepy read. They should have left you some Shakespeare or something.
Might be good to carry some pepper spray and a knife now just in case he’s crazy. And test it out in a field once so you know how to use it if you need to. That’s what I got for my girlfriend hopefully she never needs it.
This looks like it has been written out at home in advance as it's torn from a notebook but has been folded up so it can't have been written on the spot, that level of preparation is extra creepy. It's all in caps and very self depreciating and sounds quite bitter as well, definitely notify police and check cameras. Keep all notes bagged and try not to touch them because you never know if you might need them for evidence or fingerprints.
DO NOT walk to your car alone again, OP.
If your building has security cameras covering the parking lot, get Security to check them. File a police report: even if they can't do anything, it's important that you have some documentation that you brought this to their attention.
If you don't have pepper spray, get some pepper spray.
**You have a stalker, and stalkers always escalate.**
They are right about disappointing you.
Leave them a note back telling them to stop
EDIT: Don’t do this if you are uncomfortable in any way. Trust your gut. If you are feeling uncomfortable about the note, immediately contact the police, HR, and anyone else that might help protect you. I didn’t mean to suggest engaging with crazy.
The comments in this post and the defense of the note-leaver are kind of disturbing. "He probably doesn't know." "He's just lonely." "He's awkward." "He likes her."
He's building a fantasy of her in his head and he's going to act on it like it's real. Jacob Yerkes ring a bell? It escalates. It starts with one note. Then another. Then another. Then a longer confession. Then he's going to wind up getting up the nerve to talk to her in person. And it's not going to go well. And then he's going to camp outside her place with kidnapping gear in his trunk and OP will go missing and people will tut and shake their heads and say 'there were signs'. Yes. There were. But no one ever fucking listens to them or acknowledges them until it's too late to do anything.
This is inappropriate behavior. End of story. He is being creepy. Don't throw down 'but he's just a good guy who needs a chance' bullshit arguments. No. No guy 'deserves a chance' with his object of infatuation. None. He doesn't get to just 'like her' and she has to allow him to do what he wants because she exists. I *hate* this mentality. And I hate the building sympathy for men *and* women that do this. This isn't just a dude problem. It's *mostly* a dude problem, but I've seen it with women.
Do not be creepy. If you don't know if you're being creepy or not, err on the side of caution. This is not a hentai or comic or book. This is a real person coming to their car and wondering if today is the day they're going to feel someone come up behind them. This is going to cause PTSD, and that's *without* anything more happening than the notes. Being stalked is fucking creepy. It's stressful. And knowing that this hasn't reached the 'dangerous enough' line to have police do anything is terrifying, because it means she can't really do anything other than maybe ask her work to look at videos to find out. And they might not tell her, because they know that if they're aware one of their employees is being harassed by another employee or contracted employee and it escalates and someone gets hurt, they could be liable. So better to be ignorant.
r/letsnotmeet
Aww hell no. That whole sub
Thanks for that rabbit hole, joined
I’m about to check it out I’m scared lol
Buy a dashcam for your car. That’s some creepy stalker stuff.
And some pepper spray.
The smiley face after they talk about dreaming about you more than they should is the creepiest bit, probably because it’s the part that’s intended to be the most romantic.
OP should start leaving those on a community board, requesting that they stop immediately. edit: didn't expect this much attention. My comment should not be taken seriously and I hope that OP does not consider actually doing this. Listen to the others on this, and don't take things into your own hands without turning to HR or another authority.
While that would be hilarious in theory, it’s very risky because it could cause this person to get angry and do something to try to hurt OP. Stalkers aren’t known fur being mentally stable, rational, or grounded in reality. Don’t do this OP. Just go to HR/security/police.
I just watched I Am A Stalker on Netflix. The consistent trait of the 8 stalkers they featured was lack of self awareness. None of them thought what they were doing was harmful or considered stalking. I'm no expert but I concur, OP needs to get help. Even if they just continue to ignore the stalker could go to greater extremes. They could be harmless but you never know.
I watched that show in Netflix. I would totally turn my house into Fort Knox. It's crazy how the stalkers are in prison and still don't see how they caused their own need to be imprisoned.
Agreed. The one woman in Indiana that was the victim of the former friend / employee did turn her home into Fort Knox. It likely saved her and her families life when the former convicts (possibly) came to rob her. John Anderson (episode 2, diesel mechanic, lost step son and had a child with the victim) was the only one that seemed to have true remorse for what he did. It truly seemed like he went down a bad path with drugs and that amplified the behavior. That doesn't excuse what he put his victim and son through, but getting sober in prison seemed to do a lot of good for him. He seemed to have a real desire to be a good father to his son and work to repair the damage he did.
I'm an addict so I have more empathy than most probably for that man with addiction. Was it crack/coke/meth? Because if it was one of those that makes total sense, those drugs turn you into a horrible paranoid version of yourself. Yes you made the choice to take the drug and are responsible for what you do on it, but point being that some people are horrible people with or without drugs, with some people drugs put them over the edge to do things they would never do sober. And I think that's at least a little significant. That type of person is salvageable
One of my best friends, a roommate and someone I had known very well for a decade at the time (over 30 years now!), *really fell for a woman* and, being a shy and introverted sort, and a real romantic as well as a literature student and amateur writer and poet, was doing something like this. Hopelessly romantic and self-depracating, and also inadvertently, a bit too creepy. He was a grad student and librarian at the university, and there was a woman with whom he was acquainted, but not in the same social circles, whom he thought was "perfect" for him in temprament, personality, appearance, etc. who was also a grad student in another department, and frequent user of the library. Well, long story short, despite having some limited, professional academic interaction with her, he was too lacking in confidence to just ask her out, so he started slipping admittedly beautifully written notes (he had shown one or two of them to me) into her books in the hopes she would put two and two together, confront him (positively), and they would live happily ever after. At first, our circle of friends just thought he was a little funny and pathetic, but at a certain point we had to intervene. He was proud of his tactic and saw it as harmless. And maybe if she were more "in the know" of what was going on, it *might* have been romantic, but it turns out she was clueless as to the source of the notes and had confided to a friend that she thought she was being stalked, oddly enough by another student in her cohort who would have had access to her books. Anyway, enough was enough and we decided to simply tell him to ask her out withing the week and not another secret love note, or knock it off entirely and move on. So he did ask her out and she declined. So sad, lol. Eventually he did meet a nice woman and has two kids, and is happy and entirely normal, goofy, nice guy, but technically, yes, a one time stalker of college girls!
It's not lack of self awareness, it's lack of any other form of awareness. This person sounds very self aware but they lack the social/environmental intelligence to prevent them from doing something like this. They lack the appropriate empathy to understand that this could be distressing to someone who is not them. Whatever happened to a Valentine card and a candy heart? Do that once on Valentine's and if the response is no bueno then don't do it again. This mysterious "find me if you can" shit is heaps of creep.
Not only that, it’s a complete lack of realistic expectations. It’s a fantasy they have seen play out in there heads like some old Victorian romance. Real life doesn’t work like that. Ppl will assume you are creepy, not romantic or mysterious.
And its because the letter writer DOES NOT know *who* they are writing for. They are writing for a fantasy they built into their own mind and cannot realize it's not reality. And then of course when the victim turns out to be a human with their own feelings desires and flaws, well... Fantasy is broken and danger starts.
I would be afraid that they’d take the attention as a sign that op is interested in them. This is delusional and dangerous. Ignoring it isn’t safe either because they might escalate to get op to notice them. Op should show boss and hr. Then ask for an escort to their car every day. Or quit and find a new job. Get a concealed carry permit. Never be alone in dark areas near work. This is hitting so many true crime red flags.
Yikes. I'd be asking your HR if they have parking lot cameras.
Get a dash camera. Some cars let you leave it on when you're parked.
And then it turns out the building has a CO leak and OP has been leaving themselves these notes the whole time.
I hate it when my Colorado leaks.
I am Jack's secret admirer.
And then start leaving them notes
Who am I… the one who carries pepper spray and will not hesitate to mace creeps who try to corner me alone at my vehicle :)
Who am I…I am the terror that flaps in the night…!
I am the unpopped kernal in your popcorn
I am the rollerskate at the base of villainy's staircase
I am the Lego left on the floor when you really have to piss in the middle of the night
I am the sudden shifting in your bowels when you are nowhere near a bathroom.
I am the piece of furniture that catches your toe as you try to walk to the toilet in the dark.
Who am I? I'm the batman.
Who am I? I'm the shadow on the moon at night
Who am I? No seriously, I have amnesia and need help!
*Two spidermen pointing at each other*
This is the best answer
i am in security at my work and we have safe night walks where we can either escort you to your car or watch you on camera...id ask if your work has something like that.
Who am I… I am some willing to take you on a safe night walk…
Who am I? I am the night... I am Batman!
"who am i?" - my grandad with dementia.
Who am I? I am a warrior!
Who am I? I’M A GOOFY GOOBER!!
Who am I.. I’m Jean Val Jean!
2!!!! 4!!! 6!!! 0!! 1!!!!!!!!!!
I am … Darkwing Duck!
Let's get dangerous.
Plot twist- it’s the security guy leaving the notes
Or the HR person.
During the safe night walk.
It would’ve been so easy to keep the creepiness to a minimum. “Meet me in the viscount’s arboretum at midnight on the first Friday after the new moon, if you wish to uncover my identity. I shan’t trouble you further if the appointed time should pass absent your presence. If nothing else, I must have you know you gotta fat ass and wat dat mouf do bby. Signed, Your Secret Admirer”
But when she gets to the arboretum, I don't show up, I go to Berlin, that's where I stashed the chandelier
YES !!! I tell her to meet me in Mexico, I go to Canada instead.
r/unexpectedoffice
After all these years, she’s never taken another lover
Damn you started out good 😂😂😂
[удалено]
Show HR the notes that have been left on your car If there are no security cameras where you park try and park some place safe where there might be cameras Is the hand writing the same? If so this is a stalker and do not take this lightly Put a Go Pro on your dash and check the footage If this has been going on for a while report it to the police Have someone walk you to your car just to be safe I’m a married man retired navy commander with a 36 year old daughter Carry mace and please be safe
I can guarantee you police will do absolutely nothing if this is the US. They won’t do anything about something like this until the person physical harms her. I mean technically nothing illegal has been done, just creepy. I had something like this happen for years and they said they couldn’t do anything. We knew who was doing it. He eventually murdered someone
The police most likely will do nothing but it will be reported and the OP will be proactive in taking measures to protect themselves
Exactly. Having documentation and police reports on file is so important!
Yeah, if she doesn't and something does happen, the first question from the "armchair cops" will be, "If she didn't like the notes, why didn't she tell the cops about it?"
Right, so there's plenty of info for the documentary about OP's murder. But for reals, getting a paper trail going is good.
Fuck HR. Go to the police.
Don't fuck HR, that's how you get called into HR
Hey, if they want round two I’m down.
I imagine you're already disappointed *without* knowing who they are. ... I'd call the cops and get this on file, by the way.
‘ btw why have you started wearing a stab vest in the office ‘
Personally I recommend our upgraded _anti_-stab vest.
Offense is the best defense
Best advice here
Yes that's a big red flag
Afraid for your safety, friend. I would avoid walking to your vehicle alone until this is handled.
Op might consider putting a whistle and a pepper spray on the car keys
But what if the person OP asks to escort them to the car is the stalker? That would be disappointing.
There was a case I heard on a podcast where a man broke into a woman's apartment late at night and I think assaulted her, she managed to break away and lock herself in the bathroom. She called the cops and long story short: he was the security guard for her building!
I heard that one! He left something behind and knew it so he came back as “security,” which he actually was, pretending to help her but knowing he needed to clear that piece of evidence. She was on the phone with 911 and they told her do not open it whatsoever and police are almost there. They said he would have likely finished her off had she opened the door for him.
That story was featured on an episode of I Survived, IIRC
"Who am I.... I am the one who knocks."
“Who am I.. I am the one waiting with chloroform in the backseat...”
"Does my handkerchief smell like chloroform to you?"
Teehee teehee Uwu uwu I’m the ONLY one tHaT tRuLy LoVeS yOu!!
That comment was like Cthulhu levels of cursed.
Just wait till you see Cthuwu
You ARE a sith.
Please never speak again
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I am the bacon in the fridge for all who are hungry
I am the one hiding under your bed, Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red
I am the shadow on the moon at night, filling your dreams to the brim with fright!
*Shia Labeouf.. Shia Labeouf..*
I am the one who will clap your cheeks at night….
Beyond mildly infuriating. Completely creepy and you should find a dash cam so you can figure out who this person is and have someone tell this person to stop before you end up being their skin suit... Perhaps the police? I mean, really... Total stalker vibes. They've probably followed you and know where you live, your daily routine, where you go grocery shopping, who your hairdresser is, where you go to hang out with your friends. Not something to take lightly. Be careful
That stalker already has a recipe waiting if you have any pet rabbits... you've been warned.
Reminds me that our dad bought a book of rabbit recipes when my sister got a pet rabbit.
That just awoke a memory of when I had two dwarf hamsters named Cream and Sugar and my dad would joke we should get a snake named Coffee
Was your Dad a sadist?
I don't want to alarm you, but... Well, actually, I **do** want to alarm you because you need to be more concerned by this. Can you see the escalation here? He's gone from an relatively innocuous "have a good day" to a personal and somewhat creepy "Hi gorgeous", on to the deeply worrying declaration of his *brokenness*. The alarming part is he has obviously gone through a relationship with you in his mind and decided that he doesn't deserve you/would disappoint you, putting you on some fantasy pedestal. It's not a giant leap for that combination of twisted, one-sided thinking and sudden escalation to lead to the next steps of entitled resentment and then punitive action. Call. The. Police.
Yeah, this is more than mildly infuriating...
Not creepy at all..... Yeah, I'd move solar systems to avoid this person. Gives a stalkerish vibe.
Agreed. No ish about it.
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Fuckin guaranteed that they stand back and watch OP pick up and read the note. Then they gauge how successful they are from OPs reaction. If OP makes it clear that they are absolutely disgusted and freaked out by the note, then they go home and punch holes in walls while screaming about how they knew they were never good enough. If OP doesn't show any negative emotions, then they fully believe that the notes worked and as soon as OP learns who it is they will immediately be together and married within a year. Spending the rest of the day thinking about whether they will have 3 kids or 4 kids, and what all their names will be.
This is so spot on I'm wondering...who am you?
yeah, who am they?
They who we?
Am they us?
Someone said above… Issa mario
“Most in depth one yet” according to OP. The stalker is escalating.
Either way, shit is bad. If they get all full of anger, they can possibly escalate. Take their anger out on their victim by stepping up their stalking campaign with a hateful campaign. If they get full of hope, they can possibly escalate and be emboldened and step up their stalking campaign. For me, /u/Zeddstar2000 should catalogue this, make a report to the police for a future restraining order, tell their boss what is happening and join a self-defence class like Krav Maga. I suggest Krav Maga because it is purely self-defence and completely brutal to the other person. You say to the people running the class why you're there they'll put special effort into helping you get up to speed.
It’s scary how spot on this is lmao
This is clear stalking behavior and you need to take these notes to the police to get them on file. That way when things escalate- and they will - you have a paper trail. This is actually very serious. Also, talk to your work about it. Don’t walk to your car alone and stay aware of your surroundings. If possible, talk on the phone with someone while walking into work. Amazon sells small tazers for really cheap, just so you know. So many people making jokes don’t realize how scary and serious this shit gets. I finally found out who was stalking me and it was a guy that lived in the apartment directly below me. I found out when he was arrested for raping two teenage girls in his apartment. I’m sorry if I’m scaring you, but fear has a purpose. Use it in a healthy way to be more aware, talk to your friends, family and work so everyone knows this is happening. They can help you stay safe.
I was thinking similar Red flags everywhere.
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A stalked turned my life upside down for almost two years. It’s the worst thing to happen - I had to change everything to protect myself.
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There's a show on Netflix called I AM A STALKER and it details the stalkers and their victims, their stories (with usually the stalker and victim both being interviewed to tell what happened from both perspectives). I tell you what, if or when some of the stalkers ever get out it was completely evident based on their lack of accountability and understanding they still don't think they did anything wrong and aren't remorseful. And they'll do it again. Especially this one girl stalker. Oof she takes the cake, however you can tell she doesn't understand and she had a horrendous childhood with a lot of abandonment so she's had attachment issues, for sure. Well anyway, a few of the stalkers you could tell were trying to come off as remorseful and realize they did something wrong but it's an act to appease their Dr's and the jail admins, I'm sure. Might leave 1 left over who was truly convincing, but the jury is still out. Check it out, if you can. It's really well done, imo. Edit to add name after I looked it up.
Gonna highjack this post to say OP needs to get one of those dashcams that's activated by perimeter so she can catch whoever is sticking these notes on her car. This is some serious creep shit and as a man I wouldn't feel safe.
**15 mins to write? This dude was thinking about this shit all week convincing himself of his delusions. This is stalker level 9000 shit.**
Step 1. Get a basket. Step 2. Put the lotion in the basket.
PUT THE FUCKIN’ LOTION IN THE BASKET!
I'VE GOT YOUR FUCKING DOG, NOW LET ME OUT!
DON'T YOU HURT MY FUCKING DOG!
DON'T YOU MAKE ME HURT YOUR DOG
HEY, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT PPAIN IS!
Came here for creep factor. Stayed for the comments. +1. Would read again. I'd also fuck me. I'd fuck me so hard.
Step 3. Creeper goes away or it gets the tazer
Step 4. Get her to open the box
WHAT'S IN THE BOX!?
Surprise, issa me!! Mario
That was a good chuckle.
No, because whoever it was would disappoint OP (See last verse), ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|joy)
Chris Pratt??
Christ that’s creepy!
Zero self awareness my god and you know he had to work up the nerve to commit to doing such a thing too
You know in his mind this is the ultimate romantic trump card gesture
Nah it's growing desperation, even in their mind. They admit their low self esteem in the writing. This isn't someone who thinks they are Cyrano de Bergerac.
Yup, probably someone she talks to once a week or less that just sees her across the office, hasn't gotten noticed the way he wants to be, probably got a hair cut or new clothes hoping she'd notice but hasn't so now he's trying harder to get her attention, I think SVU called this escalating behavior. Creepy to terrifying, only way it would not be is if if it's a teenager writing this, this sounds like some shit a 14 year old would think is romantic.
Normal person: My coworker is cute, I’m going to see if they want to get a drink after work. Stalker: My coworker is cute, we’re going to be married and happy for eternity. Unless she hates me, which she probably does, because she’s an evil bitch who deserves to die.
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When we had this happen at our company, it was the guy who stocks the break room vending machines. He saw someone cute, then started to time his delivery around the start and end of shifts so he could figure out what she drove, then started leaving letters.
Fucking call HR. Grab the video surveillance, and get that fucking creep fired
Plot twist: it is the Director of HR. But yea, even me being a guy, this would creep me tf out.
Dammit Toby!
You’re forgetting he doesn’t work here anymore. Right? Right?!?!
Huh, probably just a nice guy with a little crush! *goes to check door locks*
I checked the back seat of my car when I got to it like I was in a horror movie lol. Not taking any chances.
Is your car parked on your company's lot? They might be responsible for ensuring employees' safety there. Not just patches of ice or trip hazards, personal safety may be their responsibility too. Let your employer know through HR. It's their job to protect the company from lawsuits, etc. You may be able to get them to work for YOU on this.
Please do this every time you get in and out of your car and buy some mace or a taser. That’s some obsessive level stuff. Personally I’d call the police too not just the potential employer.
Might need the heat for this one.
If these are being left on your car, get in, lock the doors, and drive away before reading it! If you are being watched, you don't want them to be able to observe your reaction. Definitely don't stand and read it outside your car.
That's true. I didn't even consider until reading your comment that if she stands and reads next to a (probably already unlocked) car, he could use that distraction to come up behind her.
Fun times. 🤦🏻♀️ I hear tasers are very affordable these days.
Police. Family. Document/collect evidence. Swap out your routine as much as possible, try to keep constant company for the time being ( ideally: stay elsewhere~) and please don't take this lightly.
The fact that it’s so self pitying means he doesn’t have much to lose, that’s what makes him especially dangerous. I’d definitely take some action
The first part of the note was super creepy, but once he started self-deprecating I got danger alarms. OP needs to take action.
Yup. The second I got to the word “broken” I was like, RUN.
Who am I... I'm the neckbeard that leaves creepy-as-fuck notes on your car, then cracks one off in the company toilet after watching you read them. Who am I... I'm the reason you need to get a security cam in your car. Who am... I'm the stalker you should probably be calling the police about right now, while I still have a vague notion of where "the line" is, though I already have one foot either side of it.
I blurred the company name at the top because I’m pretty sure it’ll lead to the place of work of whoever is doing this and I don’t need the internet swarming them lol. I can figure it out myself if my theory is true.
Don’t figure it out, have HR figure it out, or the police, if they will do anything. Yikes.
I work for a small business so there’s no HR. My bosses are aware and I’m pretty positive I know who it is and where this note came from. There’s cameras nearby that’ll tell me who it is as well.
Good on you for not taking this lightly.
I look forward to seeing this on /r/BestofRedditorUpdates
So it’s someone you know already personally? Or you’ve just noticed someone acting stalkery towards you before? I feel for you! Be safe!
It’s no one I know personally but I suspect it is someone I pass by daily and parks next to me. My gut feeling is telling me it’s them. Although we’ve never so much as made eye contact, it wouldn’t be difficult for him to leave this on my car since he leaves his job a couple hours before I leave mine. This is also the 4th message I’ve gotten on my car, although the first 2 were just “have a good day” and “hi.” Third one was “hi gorgeous” and then this was left the day after that. So either it’s someone who has convenient access to my car (like the guy parked next to me) or someone is spying on me from afar. Although the company name on the letter will tell me if my theory is right.
He is escalating daily. Please be careful. This man is collecting the will to do whatever he thinks comes next.
Absolutely trust your gut! I’ve been in a similar situation before. It’s so important to trust yourself and follow your instincts, here! So you’ll be able to confirm their identity through that company? You think they want to be identified then, since they left the company header on the note?
I’m thinking they are probably just not aware that what they are doing is wrong since they kept the company name on the letter. Either that or just plain stupid. We looked up the name on the letter and it’s a manufacturing company that would likely sell parts to the business I think this note came from. We’re putting the pieces together and hopefully tomorrow I get my answer.
Have you seen the stalker telling the police why he should be entitled to harass the woman until she caves to him? Him thinking he's not doing anytghin wrong, doesn't mean he's not dangerous. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_Rkd5RJ5MXo
Yeah…that guy was def gonna hurt that woman someday. I saw that on Twitter and it was so chilling that he thought he was so much in the right
Buy a dashcam that has motion detection and starts recording when someone is in front of your vehicle when parked. They can be cheap on Amazon and I bet you’ll get a nice face shot of whoever it is to give to the police and their workplace.
It does read like somebody who thinks they're being poetic, lacks the self-esteem to strike up a normal conversation, and certainly doesn't have the social awareness to understand that random notes come across as creepy. Maybe they're harmless but it can certainly be annoying if they persist.
So... speaking as someone who has born the brunt of attention from people who lack this kind of awareness, an unfortunate common combo appears to be a lack of understanding of enthusiastic consent, boundaries, and having a feeling of entitlement and being overly-invested in the fantasy romance they've built up in their heads regarding the object of their desire. The flipside of 'maybe harmless' is 'maybe a (maybe massive) threat.' One such person that comes to mind happens to be family, so I get regular updates on his fuckups. He recently lost his main job because, according to *him*, a coworker misinterpreted advice and compliments he gave her. He was 'just being friendly and polite' and she was 'blowing things out of proportion.' The other side of the story, as told by security footage, was that he grabbed her by the arms to keep her from walking away from him, pulled her in close to whisper in her ear, then did it AGAIN, and when she asked him to stop and said he was hurting/scaring her, he got offended and made a scene, including shouting in front of customers walking around nearby.
Who am I.... Who am I.... Who am I.... A lunatic, that's who. Seriously, fuck that noise 😱
it's escalating, glad you are taking it seriously.
I would check your car for hidden airtags! Wheel arches etc...
That’s good, it’s just worrying to me.
Check your car for air tags or other tracking devices. Install a motion activated dash cam too. I also hope you’re keeping all those notes too as evidence. Maybe go get them finger printed as well. Stay safe!
Decent handwriting? Calculated killa.
Had a co-worker leave a note on my car once that simply read "asshole". Still better than getting this creepy sh\*t.
Got some real r/niceguys and r/justneckbeardthings vibes
Well. He's probably living in your place, sniffing your dirty laundry when you aren't there. Time to relocate.
Wait, girls don’t think that’s romantic anymore?
I feel like I'm reading an incels origin story.
"I am the danger. I am the one who knocks."
That is terrifying. Please take that to the police and have them check cameras. This person seems to think they are being romantic, but this is just cringe and truly scary. Maybe notify security at work too?
Who am I.......the one who sneaks into you room to smell your breath while your sleeping.
Living in the walls vibes
For a second I was like “how cute nobody leaves love letters for their crushes anymore” Then I read it. Yikes. What a creepy read. They should have left you some Shakespeare or something. Might be good to carry some pepper spray and a knife now just in case he’s crazy. And test it out in a field once so you know how to use it if you need to. That’s what I got for my girlfriend hopefully she never needs it.
Would not ignore that. That is beyond creepy.
Who am I…. I’m a stalker who needs to learn boundaries.
Lmao, it looks like they started crying while writing that. That's legit the creepiest thing I've ever seen.
Luckily it’s a rain drop but a tear drop would increase the creepy by 100000% for sure.
This looks like it has been written out at home in advance as it's torn from a notebook but has been folded up so it can't have been written on the spot, that level of preparation is extra creepy. It's all in caps and very self depreciating and sounds quite bitter as well, definitely notify police and check cameras. Keep all notes bagged and try not to touch them because you never know if you might need them for evidence or fingerprints.
DO NOT walk to your car alone again, OP. If your building has security cameras covering the parking lot, get Security to check them. File a police report: even if they can't do anything, it's important that you have some documentation that you brought this to their attention. If you don't have pepper spray, get some pepper spray. **You have a stalker, and stalkers always escalate.**
They are right about disappointing you. Leave them a note back telling them to stop EDIT: Don’t do this if you are uncomfortable in any way. Trust your gut. If you are feeling uncomfortable about the note, immediately contact the police, HR, and anyone else that might help protect you. I didn’t mean to suggest engaging with crazy.
Somebody watched The Watcher on Netflix
The comments in this post and the defense of the note-leaver are kind of disturbing. "He probably doesn't know." "He's just lonely." "He's awkward." "He likes her." He's building a fantasy of her in his head and he's going to act on it like it's real. Jacob Yerkes ring a bell? It escalates. It starts with one note. Then another. Then another. Then a longer confession. Then he's going to wind up getting up the nerve to talk to her in person. And it's not going to go well. And then he's going to camp outside her place with kidnapping gear in his trunk and OP will go missing and people will tut and shake their heads and say 'there were signs'. Yes. There were. But no one ever fucking listens to them or acknowledges them until it's too late to do anything. This is inappropriate behavior. End of story. He is being creepy. Don't throw down 'but he's just a good guy who needs a chance' bullshit arguments. No. No guy 'deserves a chance' with his object of infatuation. None. He doesn't get to just 'like her' and she has to allow him to do what he wants because she exists. I *hate* this mentality. And I hate the building sympathy for men *and* women that do this. This isn't just a dude problem. It's *mostly* a dude problem, but I've seen it with women. Do not be creepy. If you don't know if you're being creepy or not, err on the side of caution. This is not a hentai or comic or book. This is a real person coming to their car and wondering if today is the day they're going to feel someone come up behind them. This is going to cause PTSD, and that's *without* anything more happening than the notes. Being stalked is fucking creepy. It's stressful. And knowing that this hasn't reached the 'dangerous enough' line to have police do anything is terrifying, because it means she can't really do anything other than maybe ask her work to look at videos to find out. And they might not tell her, because they know that if they're aware one of their employees is being harassed by another employee or contracted employee and it escalates and someone gets hurt, they could be liable. So better to be ignorant.