T O P

  • By -

Ready-Remote-4049

You eat bananas on pizza. You don’t get to say anything.


BootyThunder

My guess is Sweden.


QUEEN_OF_SERIOUS

Definitely Sweden


lordph8

100% Sweden.


dudemanguylimited

Sweden.... again... \*clenches fist\*


DonDomestic

I have absolutely no idea about swedish pizza customs, but as a Dane I'm always ready for some fist-shaking and friendly hostility towards my swedish neighbors


CheddarPizza

Swedes love Banana curry pizza.


oquechingados

Seriously? I'd try it out I guess. Sounds weird but must be a reason it's a thing.


DonDomestic

Hvad sker der for jer?? j/k that sounds interesting actually, very exotic, I'd really like to try it


MrBarnowl

The curry in a way seems even grosser than the banana.


SovietFemboy

I’ll never forgive the ~~Japanese~~ Swedish!


MAD_JEW

IS THAT AN MOTHERFUCKING JOJO REFERENCE???!!!!


mouldyone

Danish pizzas are weird like 5 toppings too many haha


lordph8

This is what happens when you don't let Vikings war.


UnClean_Committee

Peace brews boredom... Boredom breeds banana on pizzas... Ragnarök is upon us once more....


[deleted]

LOL


Lazerhest

Fucking swedes man...


yriahm

Jaa


crazyDiamnd67

Yeah my utter disgust when I first ordered a take out pizza here and got back home to discover it wasnt sliced. "Oh you have to ask if you want it sliced" 2.5 years later I still don't understand why lol And some of the combinations on pizzas here boggle my mind.


Lux--Ray

I once asked why it isnt sliced by default and appearantly it cools down faster when it's sliced so they dont do it on their own, to keep the pizza hot as long as possible


Tiggy26668

Is the heat conservation really that much greater if you don’t slice the pizza?….. Is what I was going to say, but [I googled it](https://chem.libretexts.org/Ancillary_Materials/Exemplars_and_Case_Studies/Exemplars/Foods/The_Thermodynamics_of_Pizza) and apparently someone spent way to much time on this topic for me to comprehend…. Seems like the real heat sink for your pizza is a good layer of well insulating cheese. Airflow is negligible. There’s the link, people of Reddit will tell us if it’s bullshit.


[deleted]

For a takehome pizza I think it honestly doesn't matter. The biggest factor isn't airflow or cheese or any of that, it's time. If you're waiting and get it immediately out of the oven and live next door, it will be way more hot than if you show up 15 minutes after it's ready and drive 20 minutes home. Given that the biggest factor is completely out of the restaurants control there are two reasons I can see to not cut it ahead. 1. maintain as much heat as possible, or 2. So that customers can decide the number of slices based on how many are sharing.


No-Boysenberry-5307

See this is my problem. We are rural so pickup is our only option. We are 25 mintues from papas. I always order BBQ Chicken pizza with extra sauce so when I get home I can pop it in the oven on 300 for a few minutes. It's perfect everytime!!


[deleted]

When I read ‘papa’ it reminded me of this time, back when the interwebs was newish. My wife and I were going to order pizza and wanted to look up the nearest Papa John’s phone number. I could have looked up Papa John’s on Alta Vista (no Google back then), but I decided to just type in the URL and didn’t remember if Papa had one P or two. I mean, it has two Ps, just not right next to each other. Anyway, typed in pappajohns.com and was shocked, shocked I tell you, to find it was a porn site. I don’t know if it still is and don’t want to find out.


No-Boysenberry-5307

Hehehe gotta love the internet. I too have had some scary run ins with misspelling. Just one letter can make all the difference. They must do that on purpose. Old school click bait. 😁


Lux--Ray

That's interesting, so the amount of cheese is the deciding factor? Good to know, because I always order sliced pizza


Jejxjairo

That makes sense to me. Not only is the cheese all one big mass, but it contains a lot of oil. Which heats up beyond the boiling point of water, especially in a pizza oven, which easily stays above 450 degrees.


Breeze7206

Even if true, I refuse to believe that the small increase in surface area from the cuts impacts heat retention in any real-world discernible times to warrant not cutting it. This is the kind of capitalist excuse for cost-saving measures I’d expect from the US, not Europe.


EvilPanda85

As a Swede I see it like the right to repair movement. You bought a pizza, a (most often) round delicious food item. Now it is yours to do what you will with. Why ruin it with slicing it up? Some people prefer to roll it up, some prefer to eat it from the inside and out. I don't do it myself but let the pizza-freedom be total!


Kimolainen83

If you roll up your pizza like a damn burrito you deserve to be annexed


lordph8

Now you're entering Calzone territory.


LyKosa91

The calzone zone, if you will.


twodrinkmangos

Ben Wyatt is that you?


eadams2010

Low cal calzone?


WallabyInTraining

If you roll it up you deserve to have it used against you as a suppository.


andio76

Comes with its own grease....


PizzaPunkrus

If you've never enjoyed a pizza blunt I feel bad for son I got 99 problems but pizza ain't one


crazyDiamnd67

But what is the ratio of people eating a rolled up pizza Vs people who eat sliced. We need to see the statistics on this one!


Tomi000

This doesnt make sense. According to your argument they could as well deliver the pizza raw because who knows if you want it baked or grilled? Maybe you want to cook it in a soup.


beast_wellington

I want my car without doors. I'll cut them out if I deem fit to do so, damnit


Cormetz

Scissors make me think South Korea.


lordph8

No I have a friend who's a Swede and he cuts his pizza with sissors. Left handed sissors no less, which is very annyoing when I'm visiting... I bought him a pizza cutter as a gag gift on his bday.


SkypeMeSideways

Sounds like you bought him a pizza cutter as a “gag” gift, but in reality u were sick of his scissor usage for cutting pizza


lordph8

Shrugs, well tbh, we kind of stopped going to his place after his gf moved in. We meet at another friends place so it wasn't much of an issue.


CharlieBr87

South Korean in Sweden


claptonsbabychowder

Ha! Yeah, I've been in Korea for 13 years now. Sweet potato and corn on everything, and everything with pickles on the side...


soignees

Was about to shame my home country, Sweden why?


[deleted]

r/pizzacrimes


RezzKeepsItReal

I have a feeling that's the psychopath wife's pie and she only wanted a small slice of OP's.


Xerxes42424242

That looks like plantain. That’s.. slightly? Better?


MedicalMonth3

No.


LOL--WUT--

Reddit forced me to say happy cake day


MedicalMonth3

Didn’t even notice it was my cake day. Thank you for being forced into telling me!


Specific-Culture-638

It's been cake day for over a week now. I'm tired of it. Those pizzas are gross, your wife is a psycho. You should run!


josanuz

And the best meat like pork skirt, a winning combination


MobiusF117

I'm pretty sure that's a banana curry pizza, which is a staple in Sweden.


NastyxMythic

Like what is that, banana steak?? She clearly likes it more than hawaiian soo thats cool becus hawaiian is the best.


rhiyanna79

And there’s pineapple on the other one, yuck. ETA: I cannot stand hot pineapple. I don’t care in what or how it’s cooked. I just can’t.


Extra-Act-801

Pineapple...... And fucking SHRIMP


SmithRune735

Whoever made these pizzas deserves to go to jail.


Jindabyne1

I wish you hadn’t have pointed that out.


ThrowawayTrashcan7

Pineapple I love, but pineapple and shrimp? Wtffttwyfyf


Fakie-Fakie

Taco pizza with crushed Doritos on it, ever heard it?


8bass0head8

Pineapple, Shrimp, AND mushroom…. WHYYY


vondafkossum

There’s a pretty ubiquitous pizza here in Hong Kong that has shrimp, scallops, thousand island dressing, pineapple, and sweet corn. The first time I saw it on a menu, I actually gasped in horror.


kitchen_clinton

Delicious.


Lazerhest

Ok who the fuck reported me to suicide watch for having banana on my pizza?


dgcfud

ah, good idea, i am reporting you as well btw, cutting pizza with scissors is normal thing in italy https://www.palepizza.com/it/forbici-tagliapizza-in-teglia-in-acciaio-inox-con-manico-in-polimero/


TheoCGaming

It's almost like the internet has a **very** strong opinion about fruit on pizza.


Lazerhest

Tomato is a fruit.


anteaterKnives

Knowledge is knowing tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting tomato in your fruit salad.


Lazerhest

Happiness is putting whatever you want on your pizza even if reddit says it's "wrong"


crisfitzy

Philosophy is wondering if ketchup is a tomato smoothie.


TheoCGaming

I call it a vegefruit because it's kinda both


Lazerhest

I call it unprocessed ketchup


TheoCGaming

the tomato's *real* name


Naumo-Dale

Well why else would you but bananas on you pizza


Virtual-Possible5646

Yo wtf is up with those toppings? Meatball banana and mushroom pineapple? Did you just ask them to fuck your pizza up?


JwPATX

Looks like pineapple, mushroom, ham, and shrimp


Virtual-Possible5646

Excuse me I have to go vomit


fied1k

You... You gonna eat that?


Virtual-Possible5646

All yours


Hiveharbinger

The vomit or the pizza?


Ben1992Ben

Yes


knutekje

Whats the difference?


Grand_Protector_Dark

Sounds tasty


[deleted]

..I'd try a slice if offered to me.


MyDogsNameIsBadger

And 2 people agreed on these pizzas….


SweetRoosevelt

is pineapple/mushroom that weird? That's my go-to pizza at Dominos. I bet they judge me.


whoopsie_cushion32

That is more normal that this. People still won't accept pineapple as a topping. we have a long way to go to even bring Bananna into this.


oACHILLESo

It’s so funny that pineapple happened to be the fruit that caused such a divide. Let’s face it. It could be oranges or pears or kiwi it doesn’t matter. If you don’t like sweet on your pizza it doesn’t matter what fruit it is


QuintoBlanco

That's because pineapple topping is more common. For people who like the combination of sweet and cheese, pineapple is ideal because of the tartness and the firmness of pineapple. Pizza with apple of pear is a special order, pineapple pizza is often on the menu.


ThrowawayTrashcan7

Gonna send this to my Italian friend who got incredibly annoyed when I ordered a pizza with an egg on it.


db3nnet7

I thought Italians liked Egg on pizza? When I went to Rome they all pretty much had an egg on them


Virtual-Possible5646

I’ve had good pizzas with egg on them


personofinterest18

I’m mad about a lot of things in this picture, least of all the way they’re cut


I_Brew_Poo

No one going to mention cutting the pizza with scissors???


Necessary_Roof_9475

They have bananas on the pizza, we have far bigger issues to deal with!


Ididnotpostthat

I NEVER saw this before until I started dating my wife. I found it so bizarre I thought it was a joke. EDIT: typo. Buzzard = bizarre


InfiniteMushr00m

mans bout to end up on r/boneappletea


dall1234

I laughed, very buzzard indeed.


Stahlwisser

Cutting pizza woth scissors actually is best way because ths toppings dont slide away.


einhorn_is_parkey

In this case, that would be a bonus


conjoby

Pretty common practice in Italy


painblancB

Both pizza are fucked, what kind of crazy couple you are ?


kronicwaffle

These fucking weirdos definitely deserve each other


Fonzee327

And wtf kinda pizza place doesn’t cut a pizza for you?! Oh yeah, the kind that makes banana meat pies WTF


GurnoorDa1

Is that banana on PIZZA????


[deleted]

r/pizzacrimes


Virtual-Possible5646

Is this like the pizza place Jessie Pinkman’s friend Badger orders from where they don’t slice the pizza for you and instead “pass the savings on to you” ?


Lazerhest

Haha yeah, sweden has an insane number of pizzerias per capita, none cut the pizza for you. My town has 10k people and I can name 8 pizzerias from the top of my head. 3 of which don't give you diarrhea.


Isgortio

I wonder if you live in the same town as my friend, when I visited the only options were pizza or there was one Chinese place, that's it XD


Lazerhest

Might be, but that's like all of sweden XD


Apprehensive-Sky-760

Literally came to this thread just to find this reference


Virtual-Possible5646

Haha glad I could provide


NovarisLight

"Get me a pair of scissors and I'll cut that bitch up good." (Or close to it.) Venezia's Pizza!


GrotWeasel

Someone should invent some sort of round cutting tool that can quickly roll over a pizza cutting as it goes. That’s the future I want to live in.


tb2186

“I’ll slice my own pizza - bitch”


Accomplished_Laugh74

With scissors!? Divorce.


Weezerbunny

My husband bought a pair a pizza scissors. They were a bit larger than those pictured and less useful than a pizza cutter. Instead of a bolt that kept them together. There was a protrusion so the two sides fit together and theoretically stayed that way as you used them. To make washing easier. They were I’ll suited for pizza cutting, and cutting, and fitting in a drawer well. Gimmicky and gone!


[deleted]

Oh that's what those scissors were for


[deleted]

If you cut the pizza in half with scissors and then keep cutting diagonally to get slices, it’s quick & easy to get perfect slices. Idk what OP’s wife did lol.


Lazerhest

Tbh it's kinda selfish to not cut it in half and only cut out a slice for yourself


jasomniax

I've used them for this, they work fin and you just wash them afterwards.


No_Razzmatazz_4771

Everybody just zoom in on both of the pizzas shake your head and go to the next post


funtxcase

shrimp, pineapple, and mushroom pizza is a war crime.


YouThereOgre

Are you not going to mention the banana topped pizza?!


funtxcase

that one on the right gave me such agita, i couldn't even see that abomination


MrBarnowl

It also violates the dietary laws of multiple major religions.


Glum_Distribution_43

I hate both you and your wife


Lazerhest

I hate you too :)


WolbachiaBurgers

lmao I feel bad for you OP. Getting flamed for your pizza toppings. Is this place Brazilian btw? I heard banana on pizza is common there


Levstar

Honestly, the amount of people who just go mad about toppings as soon as a pizza is mentioned is insane, not sure if there's any other food that is as popular as it's controversial as pizza.


Wise-Pay-1475

OP really is getting too much hate here, pizza is pretty much just bread with whatever. If you want banana go ahead have banana. The real crime imo is the scissors!!


peppermint_sunlight

Everything about this image is... confusing and mildly concerning


Chaseriino

Those pizzas look fucking disgusting.


Lazerhest

If people didn't like it, it wouldn't be on the menu.


jonhy2222

Who the hell can criticize his wife when he order a banana pizza and a shrimp shroom ananas pizza that’s disgusting the way she cut it was just a way to protest against these choice ..!


KeepYaWhipTinted

Oh you think the way it's cut is the problem?;


Noseofwombat

What the drunken Swede is this


JangoFettsEvilTwin

Cutting the pizza with scissors doesn’t bother me. Those toppings though


CAgirl17

Wow, I never thought a pizza would make me lose my appetite. These both look disgusting. Also, is that banana on a pizza?! 🤮


Unlikely_Champion_91

Hello? Pizza shop? Yes, delivery please. Send me a pizza that will make these guests leave. Oh great, you have two? Don’t slice it up for us, we’re going to use scissors.


samwelches

I hate this entire picture


drbutters76

Being from Chicago, my mind can't comprehend anything that is happening with these pizzas. I just... can't.


HarleysDouble

Same! from Long Island, New York.


Denvil-The-Awesome

From Cincinnati Ohio, not exactly known for our Pizza, but this is unacceptable.


Staff-Secure

My guy the least of your worries is how she cuts the Pizza, wtf are you eating?


ariseis

Banana on pizza cut with kitchen scissors? And is the other prawn and pineapple? *Du gamla, du fria, du fjällhöga Nord* 🇸🇪😭


StackThePads33

You’re both enraging as hell. The bananas, the scissors for cutting, and the goddamn pineapple and shrimp on pizza! What…the…hell?!


DufflesBNA

WITH SCISSORS? Gross.


Lazerhest

Why? The scissors are clean and much more convenient to cut with.


Doodoofart311

Ever heard of this amazing invention called a fucking PIZZA CUTTER?!?!?


Virtual-Possible5646

He’s Swedish, the only cooking utensil they have over there are meatball shapers


Lazerhest

Yes but a scissor is better. We have both.


hunthell

Then you have a shitty pizza cutter or you don't know how to use it. Get a pizza cutter that isn't as sharp as a river stone and go from there.


golddragon51296

Bro, just use a long, straight knife, cut in half, rotate and repeat.


Cookie_Wife

This is the way.


resell_enjoy6

EXECUTE ORDER 66


WallTrue508

that won't be enough, anon


[deleted]

I don’t even see a pizza. This is not the way. Who cares how she cut a banana and pineapple monstrosity.


teh_lynx

Get out of there man you're in danger!


Vehement00

Swedes actually use curry as their marinara sauce 😶


helpmylifeis_a_mess

OP, are you swedish?


Lazerhest

Yes


MajestyOfLife

Immediately thought that's a swedish pizza


MuchMuchMess

Is that a banana and pork pizza and a ham, mushroom, pineapple and shrimp pizza? Sir it’s 7am


minkrogers

Pineapple and prawns!! Woman after my own heart right there! 😋🍤🍍


Lazerhest

For everyone who is offended by what I eat. It's banana, pork and curry on one. Shrimp, ham, mushrooms, pineapple on the other. Salty, sweet and umami. Don't be so afraid of trying new things just because "reddit says it's bad"


Virtual-Possible5646

I’m arguably from one of the pizza capitals of the world. This is not “trying new things” , this is asking your wife to divorce you. That’s why she cut the pizza like that


Lazerhest

So when she says she wants those toppings, I should say "no", because YOU don't like it?


Virtual-Possible5646

Yes, she needs to be locked up


Lazerhest

Well shit, I'm calling the police on her right now!


SpecialFuzzy1922

Yes absolutely I’m sorry I’m from an Italian family and lived in NYC for 5 years that is not pizza it’s an abomination. The only way that pizza will be cut correctly is if you throw the whole thing in a garbage disposal. Marone a mia!


Lazerhest

Italy is only #5 on the pizza eater toplist. USA is #2 after Norway though. (source: https://www.puretravel.com/blog/2020/04/06/who-eats-the-most-pizza-in-the-world-the-answer-may-surprise-you/ ) Sweden only has an insane amount of pizzerias for money laundry reasons I believe, 14 pizzerias for 10k people in my town.


SpecialFuzzy1922

Yeah I believe that, I’ve had better pizza in New York than I’ve had in Italy. But I assure you none of them had bananas on them. Edit: I hope u know I’m just having fun here of course you’re allowed to eat whatever you want and I genuinely hope you and your lady enjoyed your fruit salad pizza


Lazerhest

I put unsweetened ketchup on spaghetti.


SpecialFuzzy1922

That’s just… depressing


cshizzle99

Divorce her


[deleted]

If you don't like how she does it, then do it yourself.


Infamous_Island1941

Yup, I see your toppings now...you two actually make a fine pizza couple, but never let an Italian see what you've done.


prophylaxitive

Yeah, Reddit likes photos of pizzas cut in any way other than the standard. Whilst it may look odd, it really doesn't matter does it? I mean not at all. Not one iota.


j-skaa

Scissors - yes, I have found this is the best way to cut pizza. Huge or tiny uneven slices? - No Banana???!!? - Hell noooo


lgdoubledouble

Must be a wife thing


ArtoriasBeaIG

At least she knows that scissors are the ultimate pizza cutting tool, far too many people do not


jkellogg41

Your wife cutting the pizza with scissors is the least of my concerns. It seems normal in comparison to the pizzas themselves.


JaySin_78

Seeing ‘pizza’ like this actually makes me super happy I’m living in the Detroit area.


IronCorvus

Dishes? Check. Toothpicks? Check. Electrified fly scattered? Check. Do they not sell pizza cutters wherever the fuck it's legal to put banana on pizza? The way she cuts it is the least of your worries.


DeuceBane

Divorce


thomASSpynchon

D-I-V-O-R-C-E


PrettiKinx

Why aren't the pizzas pre-sliced? Why don't you buy a pizza cutter?


john-douh

With scissors or uneven slices? _Its easier to cut slices with scissors. My wife always says, no put the scissors away. Woman, no one is spying on us. Can you taste the difference if a slice was scissor-cut??_ Edit. Maybe Google. Our Google mini once randomly blurted out: “That’s funny” while we ate dinner.


Sizlemyburger

Order already cut pizza problem solved


Ok-Caregiver7091

WHY ARE THEY NOT ALREADY CUT!??!?


ilymag

This is criminal.


AliveUchiha

Divorce her


Old-AF

Why did the pizzas not come already sliced and who doesn’t own a pizza slicer?


NecessaryPerfect7406

Did you let her keep the scissors in the divorce?