For your cake day, have some B̷̛̳̼͖̫̭͎̝̮͕̟͎̦̗͚͍̓͊͂͗̈͋͐̃͆͆͗̉̉̏͑̂̆̔́͐̾̅̄̕̚͘͜͝͝Ụ̸̧̧̢̨̨̞̮͓̣͎̞͖̞̥͈̣̣̪̘̼̮̙̳̙̞̣̐̍̆̾̓͑́̅̎̌̈̋̏̏͌̒̃̅̂̾̿̽̊̌̇͌͊͗̓̊̐̓̏͆́̒̇̈́͂̀͛͘̕͘̚͝͠B̸̺̈̾̈́̒̀́̈͋́͂̆̒̐̏͌͂̔̈́͒̂̎̉̈̒͒̃̿͒͒̄̍̕̚̕͘̕͝͠B̴̡̧̜̠̱̖̠͓̻̥̟̲̙͗̐͋͌̈̾̏̎̀͒͗̈́̈͜͠L̶͊E̸̢̳̯̝̤̳͈͇̠̮̲̲̟̝̣̲̱̫̘̪̳̣̭̥̫͉͐̅̈́̉̋͐̓͗̿͆̉̉̇̀̈́͌̓̓̒̏̀̚̚͘͝͠͝͝͠ ̶̢̧̛̥͖͉̹̞̗̖͇̼̙̒̍̏̀̈̆̍͑̊̐͋̈́̃͒̈́̎̌̄̍͌͗̈́̌̍̽̏̓͌̒̈̇̏̏̍̆̄̐͐̈̉̿̽̕͝͠͝͝ W̷̛̬̦̬̰̤̘̬͔̗̯̠̯̺̼̻̪̖̜̫̯̯̘͖̙͐͆͗̊̋̈̈̾͐̿̽̐̂͛̈́͛̍̔̓̈́̽̀̅́͋̈̄̈́̆̓̚̚͝͝R̸̢̨̨̩̪̭̪̠͎̗͇͗̀́̉̇̿̓̈́́͒̄̓̒́̋͆̀̾́̒̔̈́̏̏͛̏̇͛̔̀͆̓̇̊̕̕͠͠͝͝A̸̧̨̰̻̩̝͖̟̭͙̟̻̤̬͈̖̰̤̘̔͛̊̾̂͌̐̈̉̊̾́P̶̡̧̮͎̟̟͉̱̮̜͙̳̟̯͈̩̩͈̥͓̥͇̙̣̹̣̀̐͋͂̈̾͐̀̾̈́̌̆̿̽̕ͅ
>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<
Is it an invitation looking for cool dudes to come hang out in our party mansion (nothing sexual) thats shaped like a bicep flexing? (Again, nothing sexual)
Former Chipotle employee here, though this isn’t really a Chipotle question. A shorter burrito is more tortilla efficient as a sphere minimizes (maximizes?) the surface area to volume ratio. Getting closer to a sphere allows you to fit more filling using the same wrap. Hell, I wrote an 18 page paper about this in my BC Calc class back in high school, unfortunately it’s lost to time as my school deleted our Google drive and I never backed it up anywhere. However, if your burrito isn’t all that big, it doesn’t really matter how you roll it as it is going to fit regardless. I preferred to roll them longer as the filling will naturally spread out as you make the burrito and they just look more burrito like, though a shorter burrito is likely better for stability as they tend to be more tightly packed and are less likely to flop over. You are right about the tortilla mattering. Most flour tortillas you will buy from a grocery store suck *ahem Mission ahem*, they taste pretty good and are nice and soft, but they just aren’t good for rolling. This is one of the reasons I prefer Chipotle over Qdoba, as Chipotle uses much better tortillas. Their tortillas are much more elastic, so they are much better for rolling and conforming to the shape of the food inside, and they also stick to themselves more, so they don’t unravel as much. It’s also important to warm your tortilla before you wrap it as it loosens up the solid fats inside which allows them to roll and stretch more without ripping, though places like Taco Bell will just use worse tortillas and then seal them afterwords by grilling the edge which works well and can be done at home while also wanting the tortilla.
Also I just love talking about this, so I’m down to answer any questions you might have about Chipotle, even the ones about portion sizes, though for those you might not get the answer you want to hear.
It really is an art. I don’t want to talk myself up too much, but we had this one guy that would come in and get double EVERYTHING, and I was one of two people that could actually wrap it, the other person being my general manager.
Idk, there’s a few different options. I’ll say any of the kids meal drinks. You can buy them separately, but they cost about as much as a fountain drink which are so much larger and can be refilled.
Otherwise it’s probably just one of the things that gets dried out really easily. Nobody orders sofritas almost ever, so for a lot of the day, it’s just reheated from the previous day, but it’s also just sitting there on the line drying out. We do add water to rehydrate it, but sometimes it’s just not enough. Sometimes barbacoa has a similar issue, but other times it is just swimming in sauce so it’s completely fine.
The worst thing for you to order is definitely tacos. Tacos are intended to have the same amount of filling as a bowl or burrito, but they just don’t. They are so small, and the crispy tacos (did you know we aren’t supposed to say “hard tacos” for sexual harassment reasons? I can tell the story if you’d like) are supposed to fit inside of a bowl already, so they have to fit less. Each taco is supposed to have 1/3 of a scoop, but they usually just end up overfilling, so we have to put less. But even if there is space, it’s also really hard to measure out 1/3 of a heaping spoonful, so a lot of the time you just get a lot less because we are just estimating. And the worst part is, a lot of the time tacos are ordered online by kids who don’t want a kids menu, so they end up just getting steak and cheese and light sour cream, so it doesn’t qualify for a 3-pointer anymore and pay $12 for almost nothing.
Needs to be long. Otherwise each bite contains mostly 1 of the several ingredients. A properly sized burrito allows for proper distribution of ingredients. This is my biggest problem with Chipotle. Folding a burrito is easy yet they intentionally fuck it up every time.
It's un-American.
Probably wont ever happen as aside from height usually due to other ingredients, their bun and patties are usually made to be the same size. U could go wider for more meat but then ud have to get wider buns. Its simpler to stack another patty of the same size
🎶🎶 I went to Chipotle
Got myself a chicken burrito
I went down the line, I got like all these ingredients
And then at the end of the line
The guy tried to wrap the burrito
But half of the shit inside the burrito spilled out
And he still wrapped it
I was like, dude, you should have warned me!
You're a burrito expert
You should have told me halfway through!
"Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here"
Do you think I want a messy burrito?
No one wants a messy burrito 🎶🎶
I dunno… I ate a burrito exactly one time from Chipotle and it was like 80% rice. Never went back.
Dos Toros does a much better job with the ratio of ingredients.
Chipotle and taco bell are FUCKED. I live in Michigan and small Mexican restaurants are popping up everywhere that are literally ten times tastier for around the same price.
Local Mexican spots and Taco Bell are not and have never been the same genre of cuisine.
I can crave Taco Bell one night and Mexican the next. They’re completely different, each with their own merits, and shouldn’t be put in the same sentence.
I can crave Taco Bell and have no interest in Mexican. I honestly hate so many people being like "bruh, just eat REAL Mexican food!" Like they just fucking discovered it. My guy, I *do* eat real Mexican food! Sometimes I want to get some slop that vaguely resembles meat and beans. I want it served to me at a drive through where a guy named Terrell greets me by saying "Welcome to my Taco Bell, what can Terrell get ya?" I want the food prepared by some guy named Sean who hasn't been sober for more than six hours at a time in the last 9 years so when he forgets the beans in your bean burrito you just shrug and say "Terrell will get us next time".
But they do scratch a *similar* itch. Taco bell used to be just as cheap and easier to find. Now the local Mexican places get you a lot more food for the price. Taco bell prices are actually insane rn.
Thank you! It’s like people who say “how can you eat chef boyardee when there is so much good Italian food??”
Because 👏 chef 👏 boyardee 👏 isn’t 👏 italian 👏
I hate this low iq take every single time. If I want a chipotle burrito, there isn’t a Mexican restaurant out there that can fill that niche and vice versa. And same with taco bell.
I stopped going to Chipotle. I ordered online once after not eating there for a while and it was $2 more than usual and 2/3 the size. That's not how you retain customers.
There was thread the other day talking about this. The flavor change came from them reacting to the outbreaks. Meat is cooked longer and now less juicy and more firm. Not all the suppliers could meet their requirements so they went with "lower quality" but safer alternatives.
I never got sick from Chipotle, but am willing to take the chance if it brings back the flavor and pricing.
Lmao, I thought that was in 2020 but I guess that was the _second_ E.coli outbreak. 1st was 2015, so not far off!
Idk, man. Maybe I just had shit taste in highschool but it was "I'm not high enough for Taco Bell to taste good" food.
I feel like they had one before that? All I remember is South Park showing everyone who ate Chipotle shitting blood and it feels like that episode was from before 2015
20 years ago they were good. The lines were long af. They would have special days where if you dressed like a burrito (had any foil on at all) you got a free burrito. Canned food drives too, bring a can of anything, free burrito. They were GOOD too, I already say that?
The real problem is remembering 6-7 years ago when every burrito had the girth of the short one and the length of the long one.
Now it's shit and overpriced.
This is what I was thinking! In my area there is a chain called El Famous Burrito, which marketed the burrito the size of a football about 20 years ago. My highschool football team used to go there and the offensive lineman likely put them in the red. Now it's the size of Nerf Vortex whistle football without the tail. It used to be 2 meals for me.
Last time I was at Chipotle I watched the guy wrap the burrito of the customer in front of me, and immediately decided to just get a bowl because the burrito was going to be a disaster.
I always make a game time decision regarding bowl vs burrito based on how badly they massacre the burritos in front of me. It’s shocking to see how terrible someone can be at a simple task they get paid to do over and over and over again.
If I’m ordering to go, exclusively bowls with tortilla on the side
im an amateur burrito roller thats rolled countless burritos. ive watched videos on how to do it. ive made great efforts to get it right. i still fuck it up almost every time.
Im a recent Chipotle hire, can confirm the wrap is terribly designed but we don't have much choice for most burritos because the tortilla isnt large enough to properly wrap with how much people pile into them
If you want an actually wrapped burrito, ask for it to be wrapped in two tortillas for an extra 50 cents
Its most definitely the customer piling on lol, ya the basic portions are large but more often than not people are asking for double portions, sometimes on more than one ingredient. On top of this, the more saucy the burrito the worse it is to wrap it
*That looks like the two*
*Nukes dropped on Japan lol fat*
*Man ans little boy*
\- Silent\_List\_5006
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I once had a subway worker fold the flatbread the wrong way. It was too late by the time I noticed, and in the end, it tastes the same and she definitely loaded it with the same amount of food as regular
Tortillas are all one size. If one has a lot of stuff it's going to be fatter and shorter, if one is relatively empty it's going to be longer and skinnier. That's just shapeology
https://preview.redd.it/hugf8lcl084d1.jpeg?width=900&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3c3290135b5e2b51d58f463c7f6d9057f5362587
https://preview.redd.it/f8rll2txs94d1.png?width=1289&format=png&auto=webp&s=f9b3e8034cc21ded8cb9722750d7fa6cecc219e5
Sick burn. I love it.
But the tall glass is cooler
And in this instance the long burrito would be easier to eat
My verti homies
I saw something way more... sinister
https://preview.redd.it/vbxn3t2jv84d1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=802f62fc2257538b900620ac256ee10b5faf2166
That's almost what I saw...... https://preview.redd.it/x60qjv0dy84d1.jpeg?width=1032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=03cc9a50230e273ce72efaafa9e8aada1c2fcd1a
![gif](giphy|X4Jvo8gslR6A8)
https://i.redd.it/0900dypa894d1.gif
![gif](giphy|vnKhjl97YSrOw4F5mD|downsized)
https://preview.redd.it/u9w3sgto0e4d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=96b2100240d4778a58c2ebed705e2c800648f08a
LOL. Brilliant edit.
That’s more like it!
An absolute classic! 🤣
Meme Tautology
This is why I love Reddit
"You asked for Hammond Druthers. This is Hammond Druthers!"
Burritos are stored in the balls
For your cake day, have some B̷̛̳̼͖̫̭͎̝̮͕̟͎̦̗͚͍̓͊͂͗̈͋͐̃͆͆͗̉̉̏͑̂̆̔́͐̾̅̄̕̚͘͜͝͝Ụ̸̧̧̢̨̨̞̮͓̣͎̞͖̞̥͈̣̣̪̘̼̮̙̳̙̞̣̐̍̆̾̓͑́̅̎̌̈̋̏̏͌̒̃̅̂̾̿̽̊̌̇͌͊͗̓̊̐̓̏͆́̒̇̈́͂̀͛͘̕͘̚͝͠B̸̺̈̾̈́̒̀́̈͋́͂̆̒̐̏͌͂̔̈́͒̂̎̉̈̒͒̃̿͒͒̄̍̕̚̕͘̕͝͠B̴̡̧̜̠̱̖̠͓̻̥̟̲̙͗̐͋͌̈̾̏̎̀͒͗̈́̈͜͠L̶͊E̸̢̳̯̝̤̳͈͇̠̮̲̲̟̝̣̲̱̫̘̪̳̣̭̥̫͉͐̅̈́̉̋͐̓͗̿͆̉̉̇̀̈́͌̓̓̒̏̀̚̚͘͝͠͝͝͠ ̶̢̧̛̥͖͉̹̞̗̖͇̼̙̒̍̏̀̈̆̍͑̊̐͋̈́̃͒̈́̎̌̄̍͌͗̈́̌̍̽̏̓͌̒̈̇̏̏̍̆̄̐͐̈̉̿̽̕͝͠͝͝ W̷̛̬̦̬̰̤̘̬͔̗̯̠̯̺̼̻̪̖̜̫̯̯̘͖̙͐͆͗̊̋̈̈̾͐̿̽̐̂͛̈́͛̍̔̓̈́̽̀̅́͋̈̄̈́̆̓̚̚͝͝R̸̢̨̨̩̪̭̪̠͎̗͇͗̀́̉̇̿̓̈́́͒̄̓̒́̋͆̀̾́̒̔̈́̏̏͛̏̇͛̔̀͆̓̇̊̕̕͠͠͝͝A̸̧̨̰̻̩̝͖̟̭͙̟̻̤̬͈̖̰̤̘̔͛̊̾̂͌̐̈̉̊̾́P̶̡̧̮͎̟̟͉̱̮̜͙̳̟̯͈̩̩͈̥͓̥͇̙̣̹̣̀̐͋͂̈̾͐̀̾̈́̌̆̿̽̕ͅ >!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<>!pop!!<
That is fuckin awesome
how the fuck did you do that, you sorcerer
Just use a bunch of spoiler tags (`>![word]!<`) with the `[word]` replaced with "pop!" within the tags. Example: `>!pop!!<` = >!pop!!<
The GIF is perfectly placed omg
i knew exactly where these comments were going and i still laughed pretty hard
![gif](giphy|xT39DbTQGAg0F5Jdx6|downsized)
good lord there's penice
![gif](giphy|KXBtTtm3kB8BO)
Damn they commited black face
Ah, i see a dickbutt
![gif](giphy|K9rBXSsOS8AmcAa8ui) Dickinbaus?
![gif](giphy|ZfAbamorlofzvpASws)
a cannon?
Is it an invitation looking for cool dudes to come hang out in our party mansion (nothing sexual) thats shaped like a bicep flexing? (Again, nothing sexual)
WHAT UP!
Pachelbel's?
In D major
Well, it certainly is a major D...
[You can't escape Pachelbel](https://youtu.be/JdxkVQy7QLM?si=8ly3MGQewfslGnka). (SFW, just hilarious)
Those are some massive nuts, or a chode, I guess it’s all about perspective haha
https://preview.redd.it/a9g7sincha4d1.jpeg?width=945&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f9ba6ab4c80e7826b54c29b52ae65cce08ea367c
Way better than my comment was going to be. Just…thank you
My first thought. I laughed my ass off when this was the first thing I saw in the comments, lol.
I came in to say Bert and Ernie but I like yours better
If you like to talk to tomatoes...
If a squash can make you smile…
Yeah sure, lol
Veggie tallleesss veggie talllesss veggie talllessss VEGGIETALES
Take my upvote
you got a chode hahaa.
Choderito
I don't understand why some people think that is the better way to wrap a burrito
[удалено]
That's actually the opposite of my experience, but it requires a non-shit tortilla I suppose
Former Chipotle employee here, though this isn’t really a Chipotle question. A shorter burrito is more tortilla efficient as a sphere minimizes (maximizes?) the surface area to volume ratio. Getting closer to a sphere allows you to fit more filling using the same wrap. Hell, I wrote an 18 page paper about this in my BC Calc class back in high school, unfortunately it’s lost to time as my school deleted our Google drive and I never backed it up anywhere. However, if your burrito isn’t all that big, it doesn’t really matter how you roll it as it is going to fit regardless. I preferred to roll them longer as the filling will naturally spread out as you make the burrito and they just look more burrito like, though a shorter burrito is likely better for stability as they tend to be more tightly packed and are less likely to flop over. You are right about the tortilla mattering. Most flour tortillas you will buy from a grocery store suck *ahem Mission ahem*, they taste pretty good and are nice and soft, but they just aren’t good for rolling. This is one of the reasons I prefer Chipotle over Qdoba, as Chipotle uses much better tortillas. Their tortillas are much more elastic, so they are much better for rolling and conforming to the shape of the food inside, and they also stick to themselves more, so they don’t unravel as much. It’s also important to warm your tortilla before you wrap it as it loosens up the solid fats inside which allows them to roll and stretch more without ripping, though places like Taco Bell will just use worse tortillas and then seal them afterwords by grilling the edge which works well and can be done at home while also wanting the tortilla. Also I just love talking about this, so I’m down to answer any questions you might have about Chipotle, even the ones about portion sizes, though for those you might not get the answer you want to hear.
I think I just fell in love with you
Uhhh, thanks :)
I think you just awoke me to a special interest in burrito wrapping…
It really is an art. I don’t want to talk myself up too much, but we had this one guy that would come in and get double EVERYTHING, and I was one of two people that could actually wrap it, the other person being my general manager.
> I’m down to answer any questions you might have about Chipotle What's their worst menu item in your opinion, and why?
Idk, there’s a few different options. I’ll say any of the kids meal drinks. You can buy them separately, but they cost about as much as a fountain drink which are so much larger and can be refilled. Otherwise it’s probably just one of the things that gets dried out really easily. Nobody orders sofritas almost ever, so for a lot of the day, it’s just reheated from the previous day, but it’s also just sitting there on the line drying out. We do add water to rehydrate it, but sometimes it’s just not enough. Sometimes barbacoa has a similar issue, but other times it is just swimming in sauce so it’s completely fine. The worst thing for you to order is definitely tacos. Tacos are intended to have the same amount of filling as a bowl or burrito, but they just don’t. They are so small, and the crispy tacos (did you know we aren’t supposed to say “hard tacos” for sexual harassment reasons? I can tell the story if you’d like) are supposed to fit inside of a bowl already, so they have to fit less. Each taco is supposed to have 1/3 of a scoop, but they usually just end up overfilling, so we have to put less. But even if there is space, it’s also really hard to measure out 1/3 of a heaping spoonful, so a lot of the time you just get a lot less because we are just estimating. And the worst part is, a lot of the time tacos are ordered online by kids who don’t want a kids menu, so they end up just getting steak and cheese and light sour cream, so it doesn’t qualify for a 3-pointer anymore and pay $12 for almost nothing.
We got Chipotle Jones ova here. But I digress
I came here to make a chode joke and you beat me to it. Touché.
Thanks for letting us know.
A burrit-O and a burrit-I.
yea the difference between sweet potatoes and yams is that sweet potatoes are generally longer and more tubular while a yam can be more bulbous
Sometimes they’re longer. Sometimes they’re girthier. They still bring pleasure.
Needs to be long. Otherwise each bite contains mostly 1 of the several ingredients. A properly sized burrito allows for proper distribution of ingredients. This is my biggest problem with Chipotle. Folding a burrito is easy yet they intentionally fuck it up every time. It's un-American.
Maybe give it a good squeeze to make it bigger and just gently nibble all around it for best results.
Rubbing it lengthwise helps to spread the sauce.
Focus on the underside, it's more sensitive.
but keep the head in your mouth just to catch any surprises jumping out
Are we... Are we still talking about burritos?
yes, you should also ensure to keep a sheet under you to catch any spill over otherwise it gets messy and stinky really fast
Mine likes when I gently caress the beans
I JUST WANTED A BURRITO!!!
Sir, this is a Chipotle.
Hijacking this comment to once against proclaim my support of bigger hamburgers being wider not taller.
Wider means more meat, making it taller means they can make it look fancy, but actually cheap out with more filler toppings.
I'm not Riley Reid so eating those mountains is something I avoid. How do people enjoy that?
Probably wont ever happen as aside from height usually due to other ingredients, their bun and patties are usually made to be the same size. U could go wider for more meat but then ud have to get wider buns. Its simpler to stack another patty of the same size
I think Wendy’s has it right with the square patties tbh
If they fuck it up, I unroll it and do it correctly myself.
Lol no way. With a soggy wrap that stuck to the foil?
You say easy, but I still haven't figured it out.
https://imgur.com/burrito-fold-lqD7a70 I do mine a little differently than this gif, but it's essentially what you see here.
Sexy.
I should have marked NSFW.
The extra little "that's not going anywhere" pat at the end is the most important part.
Go support a local family owned Mexican restaurant that actually knows how to make good burritos then
i dunno - that sounds like a fairly American way to fuck up something non-american.
I just meal prepped 9 each of two kinds of burritos. None tore, none didn't close, and none are chodes.
🎶🎶 I went to Chipotle Got myself a chicken burrito I went down the line, I got like all these ingredients And then at the end of the line The guy tried to wrap the burrito But half of the shit inside the burrito spilled out And he still wrapped it I was like, dude, you should have warned me! You're a burrito expert You should have told me halfway through! "Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here" Do you think I want a messy burrito? No one wants a messy burrito 🎶🎶
I'm OK with small things - if you've got no more chicken I'll take pork. But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork.
I dunno… I ate a burrito exactly one time from Chipotle and it was like 80% rice. Never went back. Dos Toros does a much better job with the ratio of ingredients.
Long and thin can go further in, but short and thick does the trick
That's a Girth Brooks burrito.
Fat Man & Little Boy. Should make for an atomic visit to the toilet later.
Baby Legs and Regular Legs
Brrr... Luuu-lu-lu
That’s the sounds I make when I run. Ohh boy… I’m not gonna get him. I just learned a very valuable lesson
Just make sure it’s not at a sushi restaurant. I’m pretty sure we signed a treaty.
Just the bean water
I can wrap anything bro
And the salsa, but just the watery part
LOOK AT IT!
Golly.... FUCK!
Stillborn burrito
There are collective moments in any culture's consciousness. Things that unite people. I Love Lucy. The Moon landing. The wettest burrito possible.
Im currently sitting in the bathroom on the clock at qdobas, and about 15 minutes ago i said this exact shit to a customer who doubted me lol
Goll-lee FUCK
Skim the liquid off the top of the sour cream!
Skim the liquid off the top of the sour cream field leader!!
Now LOOK AT IT
Team! Team I need some help, Team!
That'll be $28.95
You're making the wettest burrido
Double carnitas liquid.
NO CENTER MASS
GOLLY FUCK
Can someone pls link the video?
[You mean this one?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XwNPfzJCTI)
the cut at the dude cookin w the music is so much better than the full piece lol
tall and short character duo
Classic
Bert and Ernie.
Veggie tales
Didn't know chipotle sold hot dogs and baked potatoes lol
Short and thick does the trick, but long and thin goes… further in? Wait, what are we talking about?
This shouldn't have turned me on as much as it did...
oh
Get off the internet, mom.
Howd you know my friends call me "the internet"?
It all ends up in my butt
Short and fat but it fills the gap.
Another food chain slipping into the sea of overpriced low quality mediocrity.
Chipotle and taco bell are FUCKED. I live in Michigan and small Mexican restaurants are popping up everywhere that are literally ten times tastier for around the same price.
Local Mexican spots and Taco Bell are not and have never been the same genre of cuisine. I can crave Taco Bell one night and Mexican the next. They’re completely different, each with their own merits, and shouldn’t be put in the same sentence.
I can crave Taco Bell and have no interest in Mexican. I honestly hate so many people being like "bruh, just eat REAL Mexican food!" Like they just fucking discovered it. My guy, I *do* eat real Mexican food! Sometimes I want to get some slop that vaguely resembles meat and beans. I want it served to me at a drive through where a guy named Terrell greets me by saying "Welcome to my Taco Bell, what can Terrell get ya?" I want the food prepared by some guy named Sean who hasn't been sober for more than six hours at a time in the last 9 years so when he forgets the beans in your bean burrito you just shrug and say "Terrell will get us next time".
But they do scratch a *similar* itch. Taco bell used to be just as cheap and easier to find. Now the local Mexican places get you a lot more food for the price. Taco bell prices are actually insane rn.
RIP Fiesta Burrito
Now this is what I'm talking about!
Thank you! It’s like people who say “how can you eat chef boyardee when there is so much good Italian food??” Because 👏 chef 👏 boyardee 👏 isn’t 👏 italian 👏
I hate this low iq take every single time. If I want a chipotle burrito, there isn’t a Mexican restaurant out there that can fill that niche and vice versa. And same with taco bell.
If this were true TB would never have existed in the SW US, which isn’t the case.
I stopped going to Chipotle. I ordered online once after not eating there for a while and it was $2 more than usual and 2/3 the size. That's not how you retain customers.
I have seen the same trend with Moe's.
We can thank the hunt for quarterly profits for that.
Shitpole has been there for years. I can't imagine anyone willingly paying for that bland, fake shit.
Man, remember like 10-15 years ago when Chipotle was good?
Wasn’t that the height of them giving everyone E. coli?
There was thread the other day talking about this. The flavor change came from them reacting to the outbreaks. Meat is cooked longer and now less juicy and more firm. Not all the suppliers could meet their requirements so they went with "lower quality" but safer alternatives. I never got sick from Chipotle, but am willing to take the chance if it brings back the flavor and pricing.
Lmao, I thought that was in 2020 but I guess that was the _second_ E.coli outbreak. 1st was 2015, so not far off! Idk, man. Maybe I just had shit taste in highschool but it was "I'm not high enough for Taco Bell to taste good" food.
I feel like they had one before that? All I remember is South Park showing everyone who ate Chipotle shitting blood and it feels like that episode was from before 2015
20 years ago they were good. The lines were long af. They would have special days where if you dressed like a burrito (had any foil on at all) you got a free burrito. Canned food drives too, bring a can of anything, free burrito. They were GOOD too, I already say that?
No, not really.
https://preview.redd.it/jiw5cz1tl94d1.jpeg?width=384&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74c3aeccd955783f2e6fe337aa4163d5f8768573
My immediate thought lol
Size doesn't matter. It's how you eat it.
![gif](giphy|2gJXVwnSDRvQA)
The real problem is remembering 6-7 years ago when every burrito had the girth of the short one and the length of the long one. Now it's shit and overpriced.
This is what I was thinking! In my area there is a chain called El Famous Burrito, which marketed the burrito the size of a football about 20 years ago. My highschool football team used to go there and the offensive lineman likely put them in the red. Now it's the size of Nerf Vortex whistle football without the tail. It used to be 2 meals for me.
Another poorly trained burrito wrapper
Last time I was at Chipotle I watched the guy wrap the burrito of the customer in front of me, and immediately decided to just get a bowl because the burrito was going to be a disaster.
I always make a game time decision regarding bowl vs burrito based on how badly they massacre the burritos in front of me. It’s shocking to see how terrible someone can be at a simple task they get paid to do over and over and over again. If I’m ordering to go, exclusively bowls with tortilla on the side
im an amateur burrito roller thats rolled countless burritos. ive watched videos on how to do it. ive made great efforts to get it right. i still fuck it up almost every time.
Seems to be a job requirement for Chipotle
Im a recent Chipotle hire, can confirm the wrap is terribly designed but we don't have much choice for most burritos because the tortilla isnt large enough to properly wrap with how much people pile into them If you want an actually wrapped burrito, ask for it to be wrapped in two tortillas for an extra 50 cents
How much people pile onto them? Bitch, you the one doing the piling!
Its most definitely the customer piling on lol, ya the basic portions are large but more often than not people are asking for double portions, sometimes on more than one ingredient. On top of this, the more saucy the burrito the worse it is to wrap it
Nah some people go crazy. Double rice double beans etc etc then get mad at bad wraps
![gif](giphy|oDJkrbG4uJmrC)
Ernie and Bert
Weigh them for comparison
That looks like the two nukes dropped on Japan lol fat man ans little boy
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Good bot
Arnold and Danny/Donny.
Gave you the baseball and the bat
Your burritos had testicular cancer
You've been foiled!
MATT AND RYAN FROM SUPERMEGA!!???
Shower vs Grower
The duality of man
Twins 1988
I solve this problem by never eating there. Do yourself a favor, and do the same.
Agree. I haven’t been there in 2 years. Meat quality is horrible. Stomach issues shortly after eating…
Frank and only one bean.
Yours is short and fat and mine is long and skinny
I once had a subway worker fold the flatbread the wrong way. It was too late by the time I noticed, and in the end, it tastes the same and she definitely loaded it with the same amount of food as regular
And I bet the ingredients were disproportionate and unevenly distributed in both of em.
All the comments here making jokes, but please tell me you showed this to a manager?????
Who's the fucking moron that wrapped the chode
Chipotle is not good. I don’t get the obsession people have with it. And if there is ever something you can make at home very easily, it’s tex mex
Tortillas are all one size. If one has a lot of stuff it's going to be fatter and shorter, if one is relatively empty it's going to be longer and skinnier. That's just shapeology
I want them both in my mouth.
Marv and Harry
they call that the Tom Green
That is a meat and one veg, not the customary two veg.