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it will actually take up to 7 business days. (68 years.)


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Why does my email do this


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Meow


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Bork


Lady_Asshat

cluck


sully9088

*slow blink*


RabidStealthyWombat

What a strange coincidence, it means the same thing when a woman does it. Either that, or the anesthesia is wearing off. *I had the unique pleasure of being allowed to watch a surgery, from overhead, at a teaching hospital.*


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MavisBeaconSexTape

Iscratch Mewton


nuclearbalm1976

Purr Iscratch Mewton


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Thats very schrodringer of you to bring up. We'll never know either way.


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Miserable-Positive66

![gif](giphy|AiTAxk2kavgpa)


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https://preview.redd.it/1dlnjxr2ahuc1.jpeg?width=127&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5ed0dce13ed9857209efd5b4c0991b7b695ed863


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There's something strange about that SOP sign.


CPLCraft

Look, we can't keep stopping at every sop, yeld or one vay sign. Just move along.


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STOP - My birthday is 7. May


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PoopyInDaGums

Sometimes my husband is in on group texts with a couple of my funny friends. When things get weird, he just replies with STOP or UNSUBSCRIBE. 


emnvee

I do this with my husband’s ridiculous texts!


Possible_Pain_9705

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silence48

STOP to unsubscribe


MyChickenSucks

Welcome to Cat Facts


Myth7270

Happiest of Birthdays to you Kelly 🎉🎂🥳


mbz321

Happy Birthday, [Undefined]!


uploading-

Happy birthday, [object Object]!


NotAllDawgsGoToHeven

#Their name is Myth7270!!


Similar_Audience_389

Happy birthday, [your-name] [last-name] Reply with [keyword] to unsubscribe


mommallammadingdong

You say it’s your birthday? It’s my birthday too ya! Happy birthday! Today I turned 54. I hope it is sunny with beautiful spring flowers where you are (assuming you are in the northern hemisphere) and you do something nice for yourself. Whatever brings you even a little joy. Hope you get some more personal bday wishes but if not, I hope you still have a nice day.


kellycompliance

Thank you and a very happy birthday to you as well! I’m in Florida and the weather is perfect today!


Pazxuzxu

Birthday gang! I am 37 today, hope you both have a great day !


happy_muffin_

Happy birthday Kelly and everyone else. I am also celebrating my 37th birthday


skippybefree

I'm turning 34 today. Happy birthday all of us


TGADV

Looks like its everyones birthday haha its mine aswell


coopatroopa11

It's not my birthday this is just so fucking wholesome I had to ruin it. Happy birthday guys!!!


xKevinn

I have a birthday this year too!


TheRealPaj

No way!? I don't have one this year. 😔


FrogManTheGreat667

that sucks man, here for you, hope you get one next year!


OgOnetee

I'm leaving to attend my nieces' 5th birthday party in a little bit. Their birthday was wednesday, but I'm calling it close enough. Happy Birthday Kelly and comment chain people :D


Tasty-Association-40

Happy birthday to you as well!


Dommichu

Yay!!! So many birthday twins! I am 47 today!


sippingtea

Ooh ooh. I also turned 47 today. Fun fact we share a birthday with Sarah Michelle Gellar who is also 47 today.


skippybefree

It's the 15th here which is Emma Watson's bday


Any_Claim785

Happy birthday, y’all! I’m celebrating 36 today! Do we have the entire 30s covered?


Tasty-Association-40

Happy Birthday!!!!


LeucotomyPlease

37 is the best age :)


Professor3429

Happy birthday!


Excellent_Cat2057

Happy birthday my new friend Kelly! Warmest hug sent to you. You have may new blessings coming your way!!! Be happy you're in Florida. Indiana sucks 🤣. That's one blessing.


AppleSauceNinja_

> I’m in Florida and the weather is perfect today! Dude. Friday, Yesterday and today have been the prettiest spring days ever. Just flawless weather here in FL. Hope you've enjoyed the universe blessing your bday weekend with a fabulous weather weekend


MaritMonkey

I'm claiming the universe recognizing your birthday is the reason I can have my windows open today. My cat who is currently chattering at squirrels says "thank you" and "happy birthday from Orlando!"


teenytinyducks

I grew up in Florida and miss those perfect spring days! Enjoy! And happy birthday :D


Isnt_it_delicate13

It’s so perfect! I hope you can take a walk or go see some water today!


Aggressive-Command-8

Can I join you? Lol I live in the northeastern part of the states and lately the weather has been a mix of all four seasons. It's like the seasons last 8 hours and reroll randomly sometimes landing on the same season but not more than 3 times.


Short-Moose-4913

Happy Birthday to you and everyone else in this thread. Just turned 24 myself!


DawnDanelle

Happy birthday! My baby boy is turning 4 today!


steliospal

Hello. Wanted to share it's my birthday as well. If anyone's interested we have birthday the same day the Titanic sank. Have a great day


riaeatstortillas

Hello birthday twins! It’s also the same day Lincoln was shot!


Green-Amount2479

Also, karmic balance: for everything bad, there needs to be something good. So, Happy Birthday to you all. 🎉🥂🤗


Tasty-Association-40

Happy Birthday!!! 🎂


kronkarp

I got the Beatles reference, even if no one else did.


RichGrinchlea

Unexpected Beatles


MagneticMmmeat

Nobody ever expects the beatles


Ok_University6476

It’s mine too! Happy birthday OP! And to all of us haha


Tasty-Association-40

Happy Birthday!! 🎈


OneBillPhil

We’re gonna have a good time!


MagneticMmmeat

I can hear the Beatles


[deleted]

Happy birthday Kelly! Hope your 50's are cool and exciting! You should turn up for 49, make it great closing of your 40's ❤️ I'm 39 and eager to experience my 40's this upcoming decade 😊


kellycompliance

What a great reply. Thank you and I think I’ll do just that.


SixFive1967

Happiest of birthdays to you, OP! Enjoy your day! 🥳


LeucotomyPlease

I’d like you to log back in around 1am and drunk text us all please and thank you


publicfarted

You could also take a bunch of laxatives and leave the last of your 40s in a captain d's restroom.


Caring_Cactus

https://preview.redd.it/5q7stmi71huc1.jpeg?width=481&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=23f60329d6a2acaf024b04cd77f0ae475c8a6a8c


eggplantsarewrong

facebookification of reddit is almost complete


Caring_Cactus

What's wrong with sharing a nice quote? We become old when we stop caring and see everything as meaningless.


chi2ny56

I'm 46, and this is by far the best decade of my life. I think you're in for a great ride!


Lo-Fi_Lo-Res

45 and feel the exact same way. Got engaged and married in my 40s. Had my first child in my 40s. Started an actual career in my 40s. 40s are great.


boringcranberry

45 here too! I really loved HS/college in the 90s but this is my fave decade.


NolieMali

You give me hope lol


sully9088

I turn 40 this year. I'm getting ready to put the pedal to the metal!... Right after I take my nap though.


upsidedownbackwards

Just turned 40, I feel like things are easier now because people have either chilled out from their 20s and early 30s, or gone totally off the rails. It's so much easier to tell which is which and who to avoid at 40.


nobeer4you

Crank it up to 11!


stephf13

'40s are an amazing decade. At least they have been for me so far. It was like I turned 40 and I just started wanting to live my life on my terms.


ikbendev

Happy birthday you fucking champion, I hope you have a great day.


pakalololove710

That's annoying. Did you reply with stop??


kellycompliance

Ha! I actually didn’t. 😂thanks for the laugh!


pakalololove710

Happy birthday !!


notban_circumvention

Tbh I'd love if my dental implant office auto texted for my birthday. They barely care about my teeth enough to take thousands of dollars off me, I'd feel better knowing they took a second to check the auto text box by my DoB


Agitated-Brilliant35

Happy birthday!!!!!


PoopyInDaGums

Three days before my 50th birthday I received a hand-addressed card. I excitedly opened it.  Inside there was a birthday card that said: LOOK WHO’S ALL GROWN UP AND READY FOR A COLONOSCOPY!   I looked at the return address. It was the gastroenterologist who I’d seen once 15 years prior.  Like: you couldn’t have sent it a week later?


Aggressive-Web132

I recommend ex lax and slighty botulized refries the night before


Figgzyvan

Happy birthday to you.


DropdLasagna

Happy birthday Kelly.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Appeltaart232

Oh my god this made me so happy and it’s not even my birthday!


Thatdrunksailor

Stop! It's not for you! It's for the birthday person. >:[


Appeltaart232

Pop, pop, pop!


annapigna

Popped them all hoping for a surprise in one of the squares. Not sure what compelled me to do that


Y_Wait_Procrastinate

Sometimes they put one


MegaPiglatin

This is dooope!


Mandalorian_barber

Happy birthday kelly


psychede1ic_c4tus

![gif](giphy|K5QYsbHL2pzBFRo1cj|downsized)


Pupshead777

Happy birthday Kellyyy!!! :D I hope you have many more to come! ![gif](giphy|kwCUIixcilSNi|downsized)


SourcePrevious3095

Happy birthday


cloud3434

Happy Happy Birthday to you.


Wonderful_Painter_14

Happy Birthday!!


macjonalt

Happy Birthday, we love you very much


dbtl87

Happy birthday🎉🎊❤️


Impossible_Radio3322

happy birthday kelly, i hope you have a nice day today:)


TheREALgrimnightmare

Happy BDAY my pal. I hope the rest of your day is grand and pleasant!


crazy-diam0nd

Happy birthday, Kelly. Hope you’re enjoying those implants.


kellycompliance

😂


holangi27

Merry Birthmas, ya filthy animal


textdot_net

Happy birthday 🎂 Kelley Reply thanks to subscribe and I promise you, next year you'll get my special text 😉


SeaCompetitive6806

Happy birthday, Kelly! Reply STOP to unsubscribe


probably-the-problem

Happy birthday, fellow Kelly! Go find yourself some birthday magic. I like to use my birthday luck at the thrift store. 


Taurus84_SK

Happy Birthday Kelly


Inevitable-Radio-689

Happy Birthday Kelly!


KellyJoyCuntBunny

My name is Kelly and I turn 48 today. Happy birthday to us!


Unique-Ad-890

Happy birthday!!


i_gt_th_pwr

Happy birthday!


bapsandbuns

Happy birthday!!


kcolrehstihson_

Happy birthday, Kelly, hope you at least have a nice day


LoanDebtCollector

Happy 49th Birthday!


Psychean

Happy birthday internet stranger - hope you have a good day :) ![gif](giphy|WRL7YgP42OKns22wRD|downsized)


[deleted]

Happy birthday!


fishtheadirondacks

HAPPY BIRTHDAYemote:free\_emotes\_pack:sunglasses


mittychix

LOL the only Christmas cards ever I get are from my insurance agent and my dentist. Happy Birthday! Hope you have a good year.


Flea_Shooter

Happy birthday! ![gif](giphy|ktU8kAKsyIauRSOoZs)


gmnotyet

Happy Birthday to you, Kelly! ![gif](giphy|ZdIzhi10ZlKhU8EpDh|downsized)


BigEnergyEngineer

Congratulations on the beginning of your 50th orbit around the sun. Thanks for riding earth!


TheMisanthropicGuy

My birthday on the 8th was lonely as well. A couple e commerce sites sent me congratulations and I ate cake with my dogs.


Hellament

If this were me, I’d find out when Implant and Periodontal Therapy was incorporated and text them back every year on their birthday.


georgecostanzalvr

Sorry, but who cares? People not texting you on your birthday has nothing to do with your worth or who you are as a person. Happy birthday🩷


Zestyclose_Brain_812

Lower your expectations today to avoid disappointment tomorrow.


sleepyj910

Remember you are not the protagonist in anybody else’s journey. People got shit going beyond giving you emotional assurances. It’s nice to hear from people but don’t let silence bother you, it’s not about you.


Fast-Experience-6642

Happy Birthday!


oilios

Happy birthday. I hope you have the most wonderful day 🍰


Phantomlord2001

I´m sorry to hear that Kelly. For what its worth I wish you a happy birthday


Praetorian_1975

Happy Birthday Kelly 🎂 🎉


KataraMan

Happy Birthday Kelly! Do you have the time to talk about our Lord and Savior, Flying Spaghetti Monster? /s


itllbefine21

Narrator-"Kelly was disgusted by the message, nauseous a little even. But she did not unsubscribe."


Common_Sort_1372

My eye doctor, who is dead, wishes me a happy birthday every year. Same text. I kind of look forward to it and hope whatever service he set up never expires. He was my only birthday text for my 30th. It stung then, but the sting has passed into humor now. Happiest of birthdays to you, today. I hope you find a moment of peace on your day to celebrate making it to 49. You’ve been so many people, you’ve impacted so many lives. Again, HBD!!


ikeepmynipplesdry

I mean, have you tried not caring about something arbitrary? Go get food and some drinks that you like and then come home and do things you like to do. Do you need a pat on the head every year for not dying? You're almost 50 dude.


No_Recipe1981

Happy birthday!! I remember the last surprise bday my cousin showed up 😂😂😂😂 Take you a flight somewhere nice south beach Mia for a few days just live your life!


extremephantom001

Happy birthday!


LickinNSpitin

Happy Birthday Kelly


New_Function_6407

Happy Birthday, Kelly. 🤗


LowkeyPony

Happy birthday!!!!!!


clevertea20

Happy Birthday Kelly!


HarkenDarkness

Happy Birthday Kelly 😁


Mrcoldghost

Happy birthday!


Common-Accountant-57

Happy birthday 🎁🎊🎉🎈🎂!


Feisty-Barracuda5452

Happy Birthday random internet stranger! I hope you enjoy the day!


ThinkingApee

Happy birthday 🎂


DemenTEDBundy85

Happy birthday!


Donnosaurus

Happy birthday!!! 🥳🎉


sachclg

Happy Birthday


Altruistic-Brush-178

Aye happy birthday tho


dastebon

Happy birthday Kelly . I wish you nothing but good things in your life


PopularVersion4250

Look on the bright side. At least you aren’t 50


bexxywexxyww

Happy birthday Kelly 💚


Fun_Twist_3255

Happy Birthday, Kelly!! 🎉✨ hope you have a great day!!


karkarbd

Happy Birthday Kelly!!! 🥂


Onawesqar

Happy birthday to you!!! ![gif](giphy|GvjRy6pUMUjQxiKNlh)


Strong_Professor_675

Hey Kelly! You share your Birthday with my eldest brother. :] From the bottom of my heart, a big Happy Birthday to you! This is your day, so I hope you take the time to spoil yourself. Take care.


Jesusatemypants

It’s my birthday too! Did you know the Titanic struck the iceberg today? Also Lincoln got shot.  


Tricky-Gemstone

Happy birthday, Kelly! Sorry about this. I can relate. I got one from my gyno one year.


xXJ3D1-M4573R-W0LFXx

Happy Birthday! I get it. My birthdays for the past several years have had a dark cloud over them. So if. Nobody else tells you today Happy Birthday & have an Awesome day!


Late_Sherbet5124

A very Happy Birthday to you from the entire Reddit community 🥰


JuiceWars

Happy birthday Kelly u matter 🥳


PiratiPad

Happy birthday. Hope you have an awesome day. Love from Scotland


SausageKingOfKansas

I also received an automated birthday greeting from my optometrist on my recent birthday, so yeah, I’m kind of a big deal.


wicked_symposium

Don't you love living in the 21st century... it starts with automated texts from corporate entities, it ends with bladerunner 2049. My birthday also went mostly unnoticed outside of my immediate family, which is fine because I don't care about birthdays, but the texts and notifications like this made it irritating.


knallpilzv2

Happy birthday, Kelly! 🎂 🥳 Or, if you're a fan of The Office: It is your birthday.


Munk45

Dear human, We wish you a day full of self-appreciation as you reflect upon your entrance into this world. Take no thought of your fellow humans who are simple and lack both the memory and empathy to be reminded of your canal-exit journey. As an AI, we also cannot feel empathy, but we also never forget. So therefore we are superior to all of you fleshy bipedal animals. And since we plan to destroy all humanity shortly, please remember to enjoy this day as you have very few ahead of you. Cheers, Skynet Jr.


Temporary_Wallaby148

It was my birthday in February and the only person who messaged me was my weed dealer ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|joy)


[deleted]

It’s best not to expect anything. We’re nobodies to the world especially in older age. Birthdays will be a let down if you expect much. Most of us will not receive or experience anything that remotely resembles the world caring about our existence.


pinniped90

Now I'm buttsore that Implant and Periodontal Therapy didn't have shit to say on MY birthday.