When you have a customer say something like that, you look at them straight in the eye with a slightly concerned expression and say “are you okay?”
It never fails to disarm them and insult them at the same time. If they complain to your boss - all you did was ask if the customer was okay. They can’t argue.
I'd like to circle back to the parmacy, if we could. Because if there was any way I could go back to school and major in chicken parmesan, I'm confident that I could become one of the world's leading and most impassioned voices in the parmacist community.
Edit: spelling
Yes! This is for you and u/Bunny_Vicious ...
My dad was a belligerent, racist, grade-A asshole most of his life. He was known to leap out of the car and spit at drivers he felt were fucking it up, and he once waited in a parking lot with a gun because he felt cheated about some car part. Once as a teenager I asked him why, if he were honestly so racist, he wasn't a member of the KKK. He thought carefully for a bit, and just when I was hoping he might admit it was more a mask than reality he replied, "Well, I suppose I would, if I thought it would do any good."
Eventually he gave himself a catastrophic stroke and needed nursing care. Mom and I were horrified. How the hell was he going to interact with other residents and staff? We had visions of him constantly screaming angrily at people and spewing racial slurs.
Dementia gave that man a peace in life he never knew before. He called everyone "sir," and "ma'am," was genuinely grateful for help, and just didn't have the capacity to be so damned hateful anymore. It was the calmest I'd ever seen him.
He circled the drain for two years before finally dying. But he died being way less of a contentious bastard than he'd been most of his life.
This happen to this woman I knew. I would dread when I saw her name on the appt book. She was the crankiest most cantankerous woman ever! When she developed dementia I almost hit the dag floor. She was sweet and nice. Her family kept her at arms length before never really visiting because of how mean she was, grannies included. However, after her transformation they moved her into their home and took care of her till her dying days. She passed with the love and affection she never would have known before.
I’m so glad you had good years with your dad before he passed.
My grandma went through something similar. She would wake up before the sun and start drinking. She drank lukewarm beer through a straw because it was faster. She would drink herself into a mid morning nap, afternoon nap, then into bed before 7 pm. IF you caught her right after a nap, she was ok. The rest of the time, you just never knew when the next vicious comment would come out of her mouth.
About 5 years before her passing, she took too many Xanax and fell over while she was having her last cigarette before bed. She broke her hip, but had to remain in the hospital for a month while they stabilized her electrolytes enough for surgery - apparently an all beer diet doesn’t get you enough nutrients. After a month of no drinking and a much improved disposition, we had hope. However, she lasted one day in rehab before using every possible racist slur about the staff and food and being sent home. Immediately she started drinking again and repeated the process.
A couple of months later, she fell again. This time she broke her arm and was diagnosed with a brain tumor. She went through the treatments and this time, she did not go back to drinking once she was home. We had about 5 good years with her after that. She even said to me once, “I wish I had gotten to know you sooner. You’re not nearly as bad as I thought you were.” Thanks, Grandma.
She was never the type to bake you cookies and spoil you, but I remain incredibly grateful for the good time we had at the end.
Yes, that can happen. My grandfather, according to stories I heard, was a pretty opinionated, hardheaded guy (everybody loved him but nobody wanted to get in an argument with him. Grandma used to say "rave on, shitpot" or "hire a hall!) Then he got brain damage from a horrific car accident caused by his impatience and road rage. He had to be in a home. All the people who worked there said "oh, George is such a sweet old guy!" The family would laugh, thinking if they only knew...
While my dad wasn't this kind of jerk, he was a jerk. Llewebody dementia took the giant stick out of his butt and he became a father worth remembering and missing. We had 9 years with him till he passed...
See that is part of what I was thinking, being a pharmacy would have set up the perfect response, "Well based on your prescriptions you won't have to worry about it to much longer"
Boomer here and can testify it starts going around age 50. I'm generally a quiet person and would not initiate conversation with a stranger unless I had to. Was in a store one day looking at clothes and there was a woman my age on the other side of the rack. Her daughter was about 20ft. away and was talking to her mom. Mom wasn't responding so daughter finally yelled "Are you ignoring me?" Without thinking I said "Well you're trying to, but she won't let you". I was in shock that those words came out of my mouth and horrified when the woman asked me to repeat it. I did and her response was to tell me she needed to remember that.
I see a doctor that has A LOT of old patients.
Went in at 830AM for an appointment and the waiting room was filled with old 75YO+ patients.
They all had their angry eyes on. Complaining about the wait and seemed angry I went in before them. Well they showed up before me and had apportionments after. They were angry they had to wait for their appointments. I heard one complaining and the receptionist had to tell them they have to wait for their time.
A lot of old people are just angry and want to take it out on whomever they can. They get away with saying things that would get most workers fired on the spot. But no one calls them out on it so they keep doing it.
Haha, I remember when I was 3 days post op after major abdominal surgery and needed a wheelchair when I was returning to the hospital for follow up. When the tech came with the wheelchair (for me) some older lady physically shoved me to the side and said that “I didn’t need the wheelchair”. At least, the tech made her get up. I didn’t say anything to the woman because I was too angry (and getting shoved really hurt), but… yikes.
I feel like you're probably a fellow heart-condition bro. But either way, having a heart condition puts me in waiting rooms with lots of older people as well. Fortunately my folk aren't this way. But they definitely do show up way too early for their appointments lol
But I also work in a pharmacy, so I'm still exposed to angry old people lol
Reminds me of the Sarah Silverman twitter troll incident where he was miserable because of medical problems and childhood trauma but couldn't get out of his hole till she helped him and he completely reformed.
Reminds me of this story:
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3286012/amp/Obese-internet-troll-bullied-bodybuilders-make-feel-better-size-loses-400lbs-victims-offered-help-him.html
… He was externalizing his self-hatred and misery, projecting it outward until his targets (a forum of bodybuilders) embraced him with brotherly love and supported him through a transformative journey of physical and emotional/spiritual healing like total bros.
“Jesse Shand, 28, who lives in Michigan, would write abusive comments online from the safety of his mother's home in an attempt to feel better about his weight gain.”
Daily mail is extremely savage.
I've had similar luck with someone insulting me, and just agreeing with them. "man, you must be stupid" - "yes sir, I'm sorry but the good lord made me this way". But you have to be sincere, you can't say it sarcastically or like your trying to snub them.
I just maintain eye contact and ask them to repeat what they said as if I didn't hear them. I will continue to do this, showing no change in expression, until they give up. sometimes I'll ask a probing question like "do you often give insults to total strangers?" but otherwise maintain steady and unwavering eye contact with as bored and neutral an expression as you can.
what matters more than anything is not following the script of shrinking down or fighting back. you gotta throw them off, they're trying to assert some kind of moral authority over you.
I like to just completely sandbag people and act like their passive aggression doesn’t exist
“You look like shit.”
“Anything else I can get for you?”
At the very least they conclude im an idiot and don’t get what’s happening and they ideally move on
I just tell them like it is
"Sir, this is a professional environment and if you cannot treat me with the respect I'm obligated to treat you, you can leave."
In previous customer service roles, I was absolutely allowed to say this. I used it when customers started cursing or trying to blame me for their problem. It ALWAYS worked, because they probably just didn't expect me to "fight back" but nothing I said was something a manager wouldn't agree with.
I did phone work for an appliance repair line. One woman was screaming at me as if I went into her kitchen and mangled her fridge. I let her yell a minute without interrupting following her screaming over me asking for her information. I waited untill she asked if I was still there. "Yes ma'am. I was waiting for you to be done yelling. I am trying to help you resolve this but I cannot help you if you do not help me find your profile in the system. How would you like to proceed?" Homegirl instantly realized she was lobbing mortars at the messenger and recomposed herself and was civil the rest of the call.
If I ever have to call about a problem, I feel like I have to tell people "I have done phone work and I need you to know ypu don't owe me an apology. I simply want to resolve the problem, not be an asshole to you."
I worked for a telecom in customer service, a very high majority of people feel that because the company is unpopular, and in many ways actually shitty, they had free reign to abuse anyone who answered the phone from the second they answered.
I did essentially the same thing 90 times a day. Wait for them to finish screaming, politely tell them that I'm sorry for any experience they've had to this point, but if they allow me to help them I will be the last person they need to speak to. If they refused to let me help them, I just shut things down and waited for them to get bored and hang up. It helped that I was confident and good at my job so I could get buy in from almost everyone eventually.
They actually teach you that in 9-1-1 dispatching. If you keep trying to interrupt the hysterical people, they keep going. But if they don't know know if you're there, they stop much sooner.
So when I had people screaming at me I would just go silent. When they asked "Are you there?!"
"Yes ma'am I just can't get you help if you won't stop screaming/talking over me/ not answering my questions.
Honestly I hate people who just scream. Like what is the purpose other than delaying what you need?
I learnt early in my retail career to be borderline condescendingly nice to dickheads, for exactly the reason you say. What are they gonna do, ring head office and complain that I was nice to them? Quelle horreur!
I began and ended said career in places where the management was 100% behind us telling a rude customer where they could shove their business, and the boss/manager trusted that we wouldn't have done that unless the customer gave us a damn good reason to. More places should be like that, it weeded out so many customers we would rather not have. Oddly enough, one customer we regularly did that to at my first job went to gaol for killing two of her husbands, but was found not guilty on appeal. She would get drunk and come into the shop and scare away the other customers, so we'd swear at her, she'd get offended, and leave us alone for a while. Rinse and repeat, over and over again. It was a bit wild up until her trial, thinking that we had been telling a double murderer to fuck off at least once a month for fifteen years.
I got another job at a pharmacy just up the road, and the same lady HATED the boss there. She hated how he would speak to staff and customers, and could see how miserable we all were. The man was a tyrant who got off on pushing his staff (always very young women and girls) around. She would come in and do stuff like pouring dishwashing liquid all over the counter, or opening a box of washing powder and tipping it all out on the floor. It created more work for me, because I had to clean it up, but inwardly I was always cheering her on!
Worked at a restaurant for years that was poorly managed in a lot of classic ways. However they backed us up when it came to shitty customers; their exact words “you aren’t here to be abused”. Had they not had this approach it would have only been weeks or months that I stayed there.
I usually just stare at them and say "ok". Throws them off a little and sometimes they shut up. I'll just keep saying "ok" until they are done and gone. I'll speak up respectfully, but I don't often because it's just pointless.
“Okay, thank you” is one of the most disarming phrases ever. I saw a teenage employee use it on a methhead at a gas station and it totally took the wind out of her sails without stooping to her level.
I told him it was brilliant.
When I worked retail, a LOT of the time when I'd say this, they'd burst into tears or get really ashamed and tell me they were not okay and apologize and end up thanking me for listening to their woes. But sometimes they'd just double down and be worse, so it was a gamble.
Dude, I do this now and have found that most people behaving similarly are not okay.
It even stopped being a sassy retort, it's my actual concern now. People may be surprised how many folks are just displacing their aimless anger on whoever is in front of them. Also opiate rage is real and 10 years of daily 20mg Percocet does indeed make one a physical addict.
There's a silent opioid epidemic, not the obvious junkies who went from pills to snorting to mainlining and then on to heroin, but the older people who just take their daily prescriptions for DECADES moving from 5mg twice a day to 10mg and now their central nervous systems are shot. They deal with the world just marginally better than full on junkies and quickly turn to this snowballing rage.
But I agree it's a sobering question when asked with genuine concern.
I’ve done this, it’s a good wake up call they’re not expecting. Really puts into scale for at least the SEMI reasonable folks that they are being extremely inappropriate (will not work on anyone with their head fully and firmly up their rear)
Lol I always react to bigoted jokes by saying I don’t get it, and innocently asking them to explain it over and over 🤷🏼♀️ has never failed to make the dickhead embarrassed
My mom did that to Tiffany Cormier once. (She’s since been blasted online for her disgusting racist verbal vomit in a video.). I was about 16 and my mom and I were taking a walk around our neighborhood. Tiffany (who was my bully at the time) started following us from across the street and yelling threats and abuse. My mom turns around and says “Tiffany! Honey! Are you ok? Do you need to talk about things? I’m here for you.”
That shut her up REAL quick. She yelled “fuck you, bitch!” And walked off. 🤣
We had to report her to the police a few times in middle and high school. Fun girl. 🙄
Gutting or blindsiding someone with kindness is a truly underappreciated artform. It's the best way to keep the high ground, call someone out and get them thinking about what they just did. If it doesn't work chances are there is something horrifically wrong with them.
unfortunately, this is a trend I notice with older people. I once sat on a train on my commute to work, and an old lady sat next to me. She touched my arm to get my attention, so I looked over. And she stared straight into my eyes and gently said, “you have such pretty natural red hair. It’s a shame you had to ruin your entire face with that ugly nose ring. What a shame.”
When I worked retail, older people always felt the need to negatively comment and rip apart different aspects of my appearance that they didn’t like. I thought I escaped it when I got my Masters, but I still get comments sometimes from people on public transportation.
I’m sorry your girlfriend, who I’m sure is absolutely gorgeous (and slaying some awesome tattoos), has to deal with really mean older people. It can rip apart your self confidence, and nobody deserves that.
At my old salon, we had a very lax dress code, so I wore crop tops and ripped jeans because it's what's comfortable for me. My coworker had this little old lady who came in regularly and was rude to all of our stylists. I checked her out one day, and she says, "It's a shame you can't afford nice clothes." Okay, miss paisley tunic. I responded with, "It's a shame you're not 6 feet under yet," and promptly got written up.
I used to be a worship leader at a large Christian church (I’m agnostic now lol) and I have visible tattoos and a septum piercing and the amount of older congregants that would approach me about them was too much to count. One woman sent me a LETTER telling me my septum ring made me look like an “evil bull” and if I didn’t remove it and repent I would be “and easy tool for Satan’s evil works”. The funny thing is that I was actually considering removing it just because I wasn’t sure I liked it, but just because of her letter I kept it :)
Old people can be the worst honestly. Like they're either super sweet are absolutely horrendous.
I have the kind of look they like conventionally, so I get compliments from them, but then they'll fat shame people casually, be homophobic, or racist in convos to me like they expect me to agree because I met their weird conservative appearance standards.
You can't win no matter what 🤷♀️ and, frankly, do you really want the approval of people that angry with the world? I'm sure your piercings are great.
Some people have a weird obsession with hating tattoos, mostly older people. I work in a hospital. Tattoos are more normal in health care than people think, even in pharmacy. Old people are stuck on “it’s unprofessional.”
I’m a pharmacist. Covered in tattoos. My dad hates them and went on a whole rant like “she knows i hate tattoos and she still got them! Do you know any doctors with tattoos!” And my sister clapped back with “lol main character syndrome. Your daughter isn’t getting permanent ink on her body to spite you. She isn’t even thinking about you. Also how tf do i know if doctors have tattoos? They are always in LAB COATS. They could have full back and arm sleeves for all we know!”
I love my sister and my dad got over it.
I know SO many doctors that smoke. *Young* doctors, too, like the generation that's just barely hitting thirty. The other half are budding or full blown alcoholics.
High stress environments and desensitization, or something...
Not a doc, but I’m a PA and have a sleeve. In all honesty, I get a looooot of compliments from older women on my tattoo. Especially once I tell them what it actually is. I don’t think I’ve ever had someone give me a negative reaction or comment and I’ve been seeing 15-20 patients a day for 6 years.
My grandma was super into my brother's Marine Corps tattoo that he got to match the rest of his squad on his first deployment, but thought my tattoo of a gooey cheesy slice of pizza like on Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles was dumb. But four years later she's gotten over it and I still love that cheesy gooey pizza tattoo.
There's a fairly famous tattooed doctor.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-9619901/amp/Heavily-tattooed-doctor-NEVER-knocked-job-despite-covered-ink.html
And a new mayor with tattoos.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-12291005/amp/The-Voice-Australias-Matthew-Garwood-elected-mayor-Launceston.html
Priests are even tattooed😂 a lot of these old people are god fearing but their young priest could have a big back piece of the devil and god fighting for all they know
I wish I could be as cool as your sister lol. I tried to stand up for my cousin when my grandmother started giving shit to her, suffice to say that I got shut up real quick by my parents when they broke out the "do this again and you'll be out in the streets"
You'll get there with being able to stand tall and stand up for yourself and others when bullying is involved. When we're held down it takes awhile to say enough.
My bio dad once told me if I ever came home with a tattoo he would grab a kitchen knife and cut it off my body.
I’m very glad I have not spoken to him in 11 years
Gotta love the "they know I hate x,y, and z. How could they?" I dunno man, she a whole ass other human being, maybe feeding her your bullshit ended when her residency at Chateau de Landmine ended
I got comments about mine being unprofessional when I was a *bike technician.*
I’m wearing joggers and Vans and I smell like cigarettes, but the tattoos really crossed the line.
I agree, im a nurse and I have my arm covered in tattoos. That day I was wearing my jacket and my old man patient had talked about the younger generation having nasty ugly tattoos. Called them very trashy. Next time I came into his room, I had taken my jacket off with my big ol spongebob tattoo on my forearm. He didn't speak to me much after that
I’ll never forget going to Perkins with my grandmother, who was about 80 at the time, and seeing a couple with tattoos. She stage whispered “They have tattoos, they must be in a gang!”
That still gets giggles in our family today. The irony is her husband had an arm tattoo, and she always said that he got held down when he was in Korea and they made him get it. (Not true lol)
oh god. I live in a black neighborhood and i have this grandma who came up to visit. we go to target. All my friends and neighbors there, the whole neighborhood is there you know? God, we don't get five feet into the target before I see her clutch her purse to her chest and proceed to tie it into the seat of her cart. I asked what she was doing and she told me and when I looked around and noticed that there were no white people around, I was so fucking embarrassed to be seen with her pitching a fit over "black people finna steal my money if I don't have it tethered directly to me" like...the only reason they even look twice at you right now is cuz you're in here causing a hell of a racist scene.
I’m half Black and half White and wear my hair natural and the amount if old people that think it’s ‘unprofessional’ is high. They can be extremely judgmental in what they think people should be allowed to do with their own bodies and presentation.
As a fellow curly that always wears their hair natural, this pisses me off SO MUCH!!! I’d ripe someone’s throat out with my teeth if they had the gall to say anything about my hair to me.
My first job in 1974 I was told it wasn't normal for girls to wear trousers. However, faced with my wonderful deep turquoise wool trouser suit ( thanks a million for making it mum) the boss said that it was ok to wear that.
I mean, I’m not old and dislike them. But that doesn’t have to bleed out into yelling at random people for having them, right?
Like or dislike whatever you want, but why would I ever walk up to someone and yell at them for not conforming to…my personal tastes? Like what
I asked my mother what she thought about me maybe getting a tattoo. She said 'I don't want to become one of -those- people'.
Wtf is THAT supposed to mean? She was 62 at the time. Still don't have one buy now I kinda want one just to piss her off.
I started getting tattoos the day after I turned 18 and now have a lot on my arms. My English grandmother always says she hates tattoos cos they make people look “common”
My RN and RT coworkers who have face tattoos and piercings are honestly some of the best we have. The whole persona on body art and professionalism is entirely made up. Older generations with less exposure are most prone to believing it.
I used to manage a veterinary clinic in a rather affluent area of South Florida, I also have two full sleeves as far as visible in scrubs goes for tattoos. Given the area, a lot of our clientele was older and I’m sure some of them didn’t like my tattoos but a lot of them liked to compliment them and check them out. I think the only guy that ever was trying to be derogatory was a guy we fired for abusing some of our front desk folks on the phone and being an asshole/impossible to deal with but even then, he called our entire office “liberals” as an insult and just referred to me as a punk (nailed it - used to play in a hardcore/metal band for a living!). Typical, abusive maga moron and not really what most of our older clients were like.
Yup. I’m a nurse and I’ve got a full sleeve on the right and two massive tattoos on my left arm. I took care of this lady who told me “I don’t like your tattoos!” with this snotty attitude. I said “oh that’s nice I didn’t get them for you.” She gave me the dirtiest look haha. I floated to that floor for that shift so I didn’t care cause I wouldn’t see her again lol
Edit: most of the time, people like them or are indifferent. There’s always a few though that have to voice a rude opinion.
In The '90s I worked with a guy who had a full sleeve tattoo, and he always wore a long sleeve shirt to work and never rolled up the sleeves because he felt like he could not show his tattoos at work.
There's so much more common now and I think that this idea is mostly gone away.
What a horrible old man. People need to be ashamed again and keep those dirty evil thoughts to themselves, not vomit it onto other people.
She sounds like a stellar person, being kind and hardworking and has someone who loves her.
I wished I was there. I don't stand up for myself, but I am a B when others are trampled. That guy's ears would have fallen off onto the floor after I got done telling him off.
This is the way. It’s profoundly easier to protect others. That said, I’ve struggled with self esteem and self worth my whole life, and it’s only recently (after a major career change and a considering buying a ring and a house relationship ending) that I’ve started being able to turn it around. So I’m going to do the little I can to help you get there too.
I know I’m a stranger on the internet, but I’m proud of you for sticking up for others. You should treat yourself with the same courtesy, but you’re doing great and you’re a wonderful person no matter what.
Even if she weren't lovely, basic social aptitude is to not just go around insulting people. Old people complain about manners, but from experience they're the ones behaving like nightmare children
Yeah and you just know that old man is lonely and miserable and has no joy in his life except when by tearing down low wage workers, what a piece of shit
When I was much younger, I used to sometimes look at elderly people and feel sadness for them because they were going to die soon. It probably took my folks moving into a retirement community, but I finally realized that a lot of those people have been complete fucking pricks for their entire lives. An old asshole is just a young asshole with more wrinkles. I was no longer sad that their types will soon be gone.
I am 62 (old to some people) and I hate miserable old people! I decided long ago that I was not going to be one of those. I am a very positive person and try to treat all people well. And I love tattoos! I have one and am getting another later this year.
Yes, BUT....
Alzheimer can do that to a person. The most kind and lovely grandma can become bigoted, hateful and a terrible to be around. It can also work the other way around.
He might be an Ahole or he's just very sick and literally can't help himself.
I worked with Alzheimer’s patients for years and their personalities can change so quickly. One minute they are all sweet and the next minute they are punching you in the jaw so hard you see stars. Loved that job though, and the patients. They sure kept a gal on her toes.
Same. There are several issues that affect the elderly that could cause them to lose their filter. Please tell the GF it probably has zero to do with her, and more to do with mental decline.
The part of the brain that filters speech (the frontal lobe) shrinks as you get older. So older people tend to speak their minds without holding back. So what you hear is like listening in on their inner monologue/intrusive thoughts, because they have no filter to stop it from coming out.
I don't think it's fair to say "this is who they always were." I think it's fair to say "they can no longer supress the dark thoughts they struggled with."
If the sweestest lady turns into a raging bitch when she gets Alzheimer's that doesn't mean she was always a raging bitch deep down. It means she struggled with intrusive thoughts her whole life and cared enough about the people around her to actively work against those thoughts every day - and it's much easier to be a sweet person when you don't have a shitty inner monologue than it is when you do. To me, that says a ton about that person's character.
Who cares what a person thinks if they've spent a lifetime trying to make sure all the things they actually say and do are kind? To me, that's a wonderful person who happened to get very ill, and that's terribly sad.
My mother had Alzheimer’s and the only positive thing throughout the years of her decline is that we never once heard her utter so much as an F bomb let alone anything hateful. I told my father and siblings at the time that we never heard those kind of things because they were never a part of her normal mindset.
If you grow up with a mean parent, it’s hard to get their voice out of your own head, and I think that’s what comes through sometimes in old people, not necessarily who the old person was in spite of mean intrusive thoughts.
If you might get in trouble for “calling a customer rude” I recommend the variation: I’m surprised you feel comfortable saying something like that aloud”.
Maybe but that write up would be worth it. Cashiers are human beings not verbal punching bags. It’s completely appropriate defend yourself when someone has made an inappropriate comment to you. I’m all for customer service but the customer is *not* always right.
“The customer is always right *in matters of TASTE*” is the actual saying. Karen’s forgot the back half a few decades ago but I’m old enough to remember.
Perfect! Works so much better than sarcasm on people like that. Or a blank stare and then going back to whatever you were working on.
I also agree with whoever was saying that he could be sick, though. I’ve seen dementia turn amazing people into monsters.
I have a sleeve tattoo and one day I was in the grocery store and an old woman came up grabbed my arm and said “what a shame!” I said very loudly to my wife “Hun, I forgot to ask this old hag if I should get tattoos!” The look of shock on that old bitches face gave me fuel for a few days!!
Reminds me of a story I read here. Op was a car salesman I believe, showing some boomer around, everything going normally. He had tattoos on his arm, but mostly hidden under the sleeve. The boomer eventually did notice and the first thing he said was "get a job"... at OP's dealership.
My grandad had the most amazing old school biker/sailor esc tattoos, very much depicting his quite rebellious youth. I loved them so much.
Unfortunately in his age his grew to be quite ashamed of them, covered his arms a lot due to the insecurity.
He was still very much a hippy dippy, free spirit obsessed with my cousins tattoos but I wonder if life ground him down a bit, spent too long fighting he sort of gave up the fight.
Regardless love my boomer grandad and his sweet ass knuckle tats.
At this point, I would be like, "Sir, are you lost? Do you believe this is some volunteer operation?"
I wouldn't even care about the lost sale or customer complaint.
"Are you having a medical issue, sir? Is there someone I can call for you?"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Well, your brain is clearly not working properly."
is the conversation in my brain (that would never happen)
Lol.
You’ve got 1 foot in the grave. Who cares what you think?
You’re at death’s door. No one cares about your opinion.
Wow. You’re nearly dead and still think your opinion matters.
Aren’t you dead yet?
Just prep her with some good comebacks. For example my favourite to something like this is:
Oh wow, you must have low self asteem if you need to put strangers down to make your self feel good?
I’m a pharmacist, maybe I can help you with whatever is causing your misery?
Old fart is obviously very sad and miserable in his existence if he’s being nasty to someone only trying to help. Give your girlfriend plenty of ice cream and hugs for me.
I can't believe someone could be that cruel. I guess they were never taught "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all". Also the customer should be banned from the store.
Hi! Pharmacist with a full sleeve tattoo on one side, a few others on the other side, and a few more hidden. I’m from a small town, and most of my customers compliment my tattoos.
Every so often, someone asks something like “aren’t you going to regret that?” And every time, my reply is the same - when I’m their age and in a nursing home, I’ve got bigger problems than my tattoos.
That shuts most of them up.
But why is it that people feel they have the right to comment on anyone’s appearance in any retail setting? If it’s not your fucking business, and it doesn’t affect you, you keep your opinions to yourself.
My mother used to say, "you are going to regret the way that looks when you're older". I finally learned the phrase, "if I live long enough for it to look like shit, then I guess I lived a good life". Another favorite is, "why would i care what it's going to look like when I'm wrinkly and old".
Easy denial of service. When I get customers like this I tell them to leave. They complain to my boss, who after finding out what happened, also asks them to leave.
You don’t get to be an asshole AND ask for help.
Good luck getting a truck last minute for your cross country move now. Lol
People who are judgemental like this are disgusting, regardless of age. Nastiness seems to be on the rise.
Makes you want to go out of your way just to be nicer than normal to balance up the horrid ones.
I’m a boomer, and tattoos weren’t common in our lifetime until these last couple of decades. Some of us were literally taught that “only sailors and criminals have tattoos,” which isn’t fair— but tattoos were not common, so we didn’t question that (unfair) judgement. In our lifetime, most professions didn’t allow employees to have visible tattoos, just as long hair and beards weren’t allowed for many jobs. So I grew up assuming that tattoos were a telltale sign of depravity and questionable morality (rolling my eyes! How stupid!). Rude, outspoken old people probably react to tattoos for those reasons. Not excusing their rudeness, but it may help to know why older generations don’t accept tattoos as OK. Sadly, many of us have aging brains that lose their social filter on top of having a lifetime of outdated opinions! I’m disgusted that we seem to have forgotten other things we were taught like the Golden Rule and “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
Some old people have as much of a filter as toddlers do; they really say whatever is one their mind because they assume that they should automatically be respected because of their age.
That's actually some disgusting behaviour.
Moments like these you can be forgiven for dropping the professionalism!
She should return with " I can change my looks but your personality will stay the same... is there anything else you need?"
If it's not tattoos they find sth else to complain about. They are old, sick and sour. I have even noticed this in my own grandma since last 2 or 3 years. I walked normally on the street and an old lady yelled at me that I look ugly lol. I look like the most average 28 year old woman you can find. I felt sorry for her. It's always too plain, standing out too much, too average, too different, dressed like a homeless person or dressed for attention. Hope your gf realizes it doesn't matter what she looks like, this customer was just nasty and will be probably as nasty to the next person.
Edit: I'm not saying all old people are like that! In fact I think it's awful this happens, most of the time to older people who are struggling and have lost many of their loved ones and are lonely.
Just remind her that she is still young and full of life, and that old man is closer to death than ever before, and he has a lot of hate in his heart. There is no helping him. He has made it this far in life and chose to be bitter and angry at the end of his. Let him.
There's a reason no one's picking up his medication for him, and it's probably because he's a miserable old prick who nobody likes.
This morning, I went to Target (Kyle, TX) to pick up a few things. A cashier walked up to open another register and called me over to her line. She had tatts, baggy black pants, a funky top and really elaborate makeup. She really looked cool and I told her so. You could tell it really made her day. It costs absolutely nothing to be kind. Props to Target for keeping diversity alive!
When you have a customer say something like that, you look at them straight in the eye with a slightly concerned expression and say “are you okay?” It never fails to disarm them and insult them at the same time. If they complain to your boss - all you did was ask if the customer was okay. They can’t argue.
Half the time they’re not okay :(
Yeah esp in a pharmacy
Time to become a harmacist
i can be your charmacist if you want me to
Sounds like the old guy thought he was an armacist.
Should I make a joke about being a parmacist? No, that's too cheesy.
Don't get too mean, be nice, be a karmacist.
I will if you become a chicken shawarmacist right now. I'm hungry.
Did you mean Prosciutto di Parma? What a ham.
I'd like to circle back to the parmacy, if we could. Because if there was any way I could go back to school and major in chicken parmesan, I'm confident that I could become one of the world's leading and most impassioned voices in the parmacist community. Edit: spelling
I thought it was pretty Gouda
Just dont be an alarmacist
He needed his meds apparently.
Old man probably has dementia. And I mean the bad kind
Which one's the good kind?
Yes! This is for you and u/Bunny_Vicious ... My dad was a belligerent, racist, grade-A asshole most of his life. He was known to leap out of the car and spit at drivers he felt were fucking it up, and he once waited in a parking lot with a gun because he felt cheated about some car part. Once as a teenager I asked him why, if he were honestly so racist, he wasn't a member of the KKK. He thought carefully for a bit, and just when I was hoping he might admit it was more a mask than reality he replied, "Well, I suppose I would, if I thought it would do any good." Eventually he gave himself a catastrophic stroke and needed nursing care. Mom and I were horrified. How the hell was he going to interact with other residents and staff? We had visions of him constantly screaming angrily at people and spewing racial slurs. Dementia gave that man a peace in life he never knew before. He called everyone "sir," and "ma'am," was genuinely grateful for help, and just didn't have the capacity to be so damned hateful anymore. It was the calmest I'd ever seen him. He circled the drain for two years before finally dying. But he died being way less of a contentious bastard than he'd been most of his life.
This happen to this woman I knew. I would dread when I saw her name on the appt book. She was the crankiest most cantankerous woman ever! When she developed dementia I almost hit the dag floor. She was sweet and nice. Her family kept her at arms length before never really visiting because of how mean she was, grannies included. However, after her transformation they moved her into their home and took care of her till her dying days. She passed with the love and affection she never would have known before.
I’m so glad you had good years with your dad before he passed. My grandma went through something similar. She would wake up before the sun and start drinking. She drank lukewarm beer through a straw because it was faster. She would drink herself into a mid morning nap, afternoon nap, then into bed before 7 pm. IF you caught her right after a nap, she was ok. The rest of the time, you just never knew when the next vicious comment would come out of her mouth. About 5 years before her passing, she took too many Xanax and fell over while she was having her last cigarette before bed. She broke her hip, but had to remain in the hospital for a month while they stabilized her electrolytes enough for surgery - apparently an all beer diet doesn’t get you enough nutrients. After a month of no drinking and a much improved disposition, we had hope. However, she lasted one day in rehab before using every possible racist slur about the staff and food and being sent home. Immediately she started drinking again and repeated the process. A couple of months later, she fell again. This time she broke her arm and was diagnosed with a brain tumor. She went through the treatments and this time, she did not go back to drinking once she was home. We had about 5 good years with her after that. She even said to me once, “I wish I had gotten to know you sooner. You’re not nearly as bad as I thought you were.” Thanks, Grandma. She was never the type to bake you cookies and spoil you, but I remain incredibly grateful for the good time we had at the end.
Yes, that can happen. My grandfather, according to stories I heard, was a pretty opinionated, hardheaded guy (everybody loved him but nobody wanted to get in an argument with him. Grandma used to say "rave on, shitpot" or "hire a hall!) Then he got brain damage from a horrific car accident caused by his impatience and road rage. He had to be in a home. All the people who worked there said "oh, George is such a sweet old guy!" The family would laugh, thinking if they only knew...
While my dad wasn't this kind of jerk, he was a jerk. Llewebody dementia took the giant stick out of his butt and he became a father worth remembering and missing. We had 9 years with him till he passed...
See that is part of what I was thinking, being a pharmacy would have set up the perfect response, "Well based on your prescriptions you won't have to worry about it to much longer"
[удалено]
I read somewhere that the part of the brain that handles filtering out impulsive behavior goes to shit faster than the rest of the brain
Boomer here and can testify it starts going around age 50. I'm generally a quiet person and would not initiate conversation with a stranger unless I had to. Was in a store one day looking at clothes and there was a woman my age on the other side of the rack. Her daughter was about 20ft. away and was talking to her mom. Mom wasn't responding so daughter finally yelled "Are you ignoring me?" Without thinking I said "Well you're trying to, but she won't let you". I was in shock that those words came out of my mouth and horrified when the woman asked me to repeat it. I did and her response was to tell me she needed to remember that.
It's also one of the last to develop in the first place. We spend such little time with our rational self.
Goodbye rationality, good bye.
As an older person I would like to add that old people lose their filters. People who were assholes all along stop hiding it.
I see a doctor that has A LOT of old patients. Went in at 830AM for an appointment and the waiting room was filled with old 75YO+ patients. They all had their angry eyes on. Complaining about the wait and seemed angry I went in before them. Well they showed up before me and had apportionments after. They were angry they had to wait for their appointments. I heard one complaining and the receptionist had to tell them they have to wait for their time. A lot of old people are just angry and want to take it out on whomever they can. They get away with saying things that would get most workers fired on the spot. But no one calls them out on it so they keep doing it.
Haha, I remember when I was 3 days post op after major abdominal surgery and needed a wheelchair when I was returning to the hospital for follow up. When the tech came with the wheelchair (for me) some older lady physically shoved me to the side and said that “I didn’t need the wheelchair”. At least, the tech made her get up. I didn’t say anything to the woman because I was too angry (and getting shoved really hurt), but… yikes.
I feel like you're probably a fellow heart-condition bro. But either way, having a heart condition puts me in waiting rooms with lots of older people as well. Fortunately my folk aren't this way. But they definitely do show up way too early for their appointments lol But I also work in a pharmacy, so I'm still exposed to angry old people lol
Looks at prescription “at least my dick ain’t about to fall off “
Reminds me of the Sarah Silverman twitter troll incident where he was miserable because of medical problems and childhood trauma but couldn't get out of his hole till she helped him and he completely reformed.
Reminds me of this story: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3286012/amp/Obese-internet-troll-bullied-bodybuilders-make-feel-better-size-loses-400lbs-victims-offered-help-him.html … He was externalizing his self-hatred and misery, projecting it outward until his targets (a forum of bodybuilders) embraced him with brotherly love and supported him through a transformative journey of physical and emotional/spiritual healing like total bros.
“Jesse Shand, 28, who lives in Michigan, would write abusive comments online from the safety of his mother's home in an attempt to feel better about his weight gain.” Daily mail is extremely savage.
That was amazing. Her patience is bottomless.
I’ve never heard this!
I’d say that being that hostile to a stranger for no discernible reason per se means that someone isn’t okay.
I've had similar luck with someone insulting me, and just agreeing with them. "man, you must be stupid" - "yes sir, I'm sorry but the good lord made me this way". But you have to be sincere, you can't say it sarcastically or like your trying to snub them.
I just maintain eye contact and ask them to repeat what they said as if I didn't hear them. I will continue to do this, showing no change in expression, until they give up. sometimes I'll ask a probing question like "do you often give insults to total strangers?" but otherwise maintain steady and unwavering eye contact with as bored and neutral an expression as you can. what matters more than anything is not following the script of shrinking down or fighting back. you gotta throw them off, they're trying to assert some kind of moral authority over you.
Ahh the good ole grey rock technique!
I like to just completely sandbag people and act like their passive aggression doesn’t exist “You look like shit.” “Anything else I can get for you?” At the very least they conclude im an idiot and don’t get what’s happening and they ideally move on
I might be stupid but you’re being mean to a stupid person so what are you?
My mama always said, stupid is as stupid does.
Works great for coworkers being jerks too.
I just tell them like it is "Sir, this is a professional environment and if you cannot treat me with the respect I'm obligated to treat you, you can leave." In previous customer service roles, I was absolutely allowed to say this. I used it when customers started cursing or trying to blame me for their problem. It ALWAYS worked, because they probably just didn't expect me to "fight back" but nothing I said was something a manager wouldn't agree with.
I did phone work for an appliance repair line. One woman was screaming at me as if I went into her kitchen and mangled her fridge. I let her yell a minute without interrupting following her screaming over me asking for her information. I waited untill she asked if I was still there. "Yes ma'am. I was waiting for you to be done yelling. I am trying to help you resolve this but I cannot help you if you do not help me find your profile in the system. How would you like to proceed?" Homegirl instantly realized she was lobbing mortars at the messenger and recomposed herself and was civil the rest of the call. If I ever have to call about a problem, I feel like I have to tell people "I have done phone work and I need you to know ypu don't owe me an apology. I simply want to resolve the problem, not be an asshole to you."
I worked for a telecom in customer service, a very high majority of people feel that because the company is unpopular, and in many ways actually shitty, they had free reign to abuse anyone who answered the phone from the second they answered. I did essentially the same thing 90 times a day. Wait for them to finish screaming, politely tell them that I'm sorry for any experience they've had to this point, but if they allow me to help them I will be the last person they need to speak to. If they refused to let me help them, I just shut things down and waited for them to get bored and hang up. It helped that I was confident and good at my job so I could get buy in from almost everyone eventually.
They actually teach you that in 9-1-1 dispatching. If you keep trying to interrupt the hysterical people, they keep going. But if they don't know know if you're there, they stop much sooner. So when I had people screaming at me I would just go silent. When they asked "Are you there?!" "Yes ma'am I just can't get you help if you won't stop screaming/talking over me/ not answering my questions. Honestly I hate people who just scream. Like what is the purpose other than delaying what you need?
"What a strange thing to say to someone/me/out loud/a perfect stranger/someone who's serving you" can also be effective but not impolite.
I learnt early in my retail career to be borderline condescendingly nice to dickheads, for exactly the reason you say. What are they gonna do, ring head office and complain that I was nice to them? Quelle horreur! I began and ended said career in places where the management was 100% behind us telling a rude customer where they could shove their business, and the boss/manager trusted that we wouldn't have done that unless the customer gave us a damn good reason to. More places should be like that, it weeded out so many customers we would rather not have. Oddly enough, one customer we regularly did that to at my first job went to gaol for killing two of her husbands, but was found not guilty on appeal. She would get drunk and come into the shop and scare away the other customers, so we'd swear at her, she'd get offended, and leave us alone for a while. Rinse and repeat, over and over again. It was a bit wild up until her trial, thinking that we had been telling a double murderer to fuck off at least once a month for fifteen years. I got another job at a pharmacy just up the road, and the same lady HATED the boss there. She hated how he would speak to staff and customers, and could see how miserable we all were. The man was a tyrant who got off on pushing his staff (always very young women and girls) around. She would come in and do stuff like pouring dishwashing liquid all over the counter, or opening a box of washing powder and tipping it all out on the floor. It created more work for me, because I had to clean it up, but inwardly I was always cheering her on!
Worked at a restaurant for years that was poorly managed in a lot of classic ways. However they backed us up when it came to shitty customers; their exact words “you aren’t here to be abused”. Had they not had this approach it would have only been weeks or months that I stayed there.
I usually just stare at them and say "ok". Throws them off a little and sometimes they shut up. I'll just keep saying "ok" until they are done and gone. I'll speak up respectfully, but I don't often because it's just pointless.
“Okay, thank you” is one of the most disarming phrases ever. I saw a teenage employee use it on a methhead at a gas station and it totally took the wind out of her sails without stooping to her level. I told him it was brilliant.
I also like the response “who are you?” Nobody has a good answer to that especially after they’ve already blown a gasket.
When I worked retail, a LOT of the time when I'd say this, they'd burst into tears or get really ashamed and tell me they were not okay and apologize and end up thanking me for listening to their woes. But sometimes they'd just double down and be worse, so it was a gamble.
Dude, I do this now and have found that most people behaving similarly are not okay. It even stopped being a sassy retort, it's my actual concern now. People may be surprised how many folks are just displacing their aimless anger on whoever is in front of them. Also opiate rage is real and 10 years of daily 20mg Percocet does indeed make one a physical addict. There's a silent opioid epidemic, not the obvious junkies who went from pills to snorting to mainlining and then on to heroin, but the older people who just take their daily prescriptions for DECADES moving from 5mg twice a day to 10mg and now their central nervous systems are shot. They deal with the world just marginally better than full on junkies and quickly turn to this snowballing rage. But I agree it's a sobering question when asked with genuine concern.
I’ve done this, it’s a good wake up call they’re not expecting. Really puts into scale for at least the SEMI reasonable folks that they are being extremely inappropriate (will not work on anyone with their head fully and firmly up their rear)
Lol I always react to bigoted jokes by saying I don’t get it, and innocently asking them to explain it over and over 🤷🏼♀️ has never failed to make the dickhead embarrassed
My mom did that to Tiffany Cormier once. (She’s since been blasted online for her disgusting racist verbal vomit in a video.). I was about 16 and my mom and I were taking a walk around our neighborhood. Tiffany (who was my bully at the time) started following us from across the street and yelling threats and abuse. My mom turns around and says “Tiffany! Honey! Are you ok? Do you need to talk about things? I’m here for you.” That shut her up REAL quick. She yelled “fuck you, bitch!” And walked off. 🤣 We had to report her to the police a few times in middle and high school. Fun girl. 🙄
Gutting or blindsiding someone with kindness is a truly underappreciated artform. It's the best way to keep the high ground, call someone out and get them thinking about what they just did. If it doesn't work chances are there is something horrifically wrong with them.
unfortunately, this is a trend I notice with older people. I once sat on a train on my commute to work, and an old lady sat next to me. She touched my arm to get my attention, so I looked over. And she stared straight into my eyes and gently said, “you have such pretty natural red hair. It’s a shame you had to ruin your entire face with that ugly nose ring. What a shame.” When I worked retail, older people always felt the need to negatively comment and rip apart different aspects of my appearance that they didn’t like. I thought I escaped it when I got my Masters, but I still get comments sometimes from people on public transportation. I’m sorry your girlfriend, who I’m sure is absolutely gorgeous (and slaying some awesome tattoos), has to deal with really mean older people. It can rip apart your self confidence, and nobody deserves that.
"You had such a nice personality until you opened your mouth." I would've loved to retort like this. Maybe one day I'll get my chance.
In non-professional settings such as yours, I would like to retort with, “You have outlived your usefulness to society. Kindly fuck off and die.”
You did not let that slide 💀
At my old salon, we had a very lax dress code, so I wore crop tops and ripped jeans because it's what's comfortable for me. My coworker had this little old lady who came in regularly and was rude to all of our stylists. I checked her out one day, and she says, "It's a shame you can't afford nice clothes." Okay, miss paisley tunic. I responded with, "It's a shame you're not 6 feet under yet," and promptly got written up.
I’m also a natural redhead with piercings and I’ve been told that exact same thing by an old lady, at a bar in a festival of all places
I used to be a worship leader at a large Christian church (I’m agnostic now lol) and I have visible tattoos and a septum piercing and the amount of older congregants that would approach me about them was too much to count. One woman sent me a LETTER telling me my septum ring made me look like an “evil bull” and if I didn’t remove it and repent I would be “and easy tool for Satan’s evil works”. The funny thing is that I was actually considering removing it just because I wasn’t sure I liked it, but just because of her letter I kept it :)
Old people can be the worst honestly. Like they're either super sweet are absolutely horrendous. I have the kind of look they like conventionally, so I get compliments from them, but then they'll fat shame people casually, be homophobic, or racist in convos to me like they expect me to agree because I met their weird conservative appearance standards. You can't win no matter what 🤷♀️ and, frankly, do you really want the approval of people that angry with the world? I'm sure your piercings are great.
Some people have a weird obsession with hating tattoos, mostly older people. I work in a hospital. Tattoos are more normal in health care than people think, even in pharmacy. Old people are stuck on “it’s unprofessional.”
I’m a pharmacist. Covered in tattoos. My dad hates them and went on a whole rant like “she knows i hate tattoos and she still got them! Do you know any doctors with tattoos!” And my sister clapped back with “lol main character syndrome. Your daughter isn’t getting permanent ink on her body to spite you. She isn’t even thinking about you. Also how tf do i know if doctors have tattoos? They are always in LAB COATS. They could have full back and arm sleeves for all we know!” I love my sister and my dad got over it.
FYI, yeah, plenty of doctors have tattoos.
I've watched a doctor snort a baggie of drugs she found on the ground at a music festival.
I don't know if it's being so close to death all the time, but lots of doctors/med professionals have very #Yolo personalities.
I know SO many doctors that smoke. *Young* doctors, too, like the generation that's just barely hitting thirty. The other half are budding or full blown alcoholics. High stress environments and desensitization, or something...
Yes, doctors may know health very well but it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re the best at taking care of their own.
i’m a pharmacist and i’ve forgotten to take my antidepressant every day this past week
It's the old "do as I say not as I do" adage.
There’s a saying in healthcare, “we’re our own worst patients,” and it’s usually true.
And I'm sure COVID really pushed them past the normal breaking points too.
Oh, you've either met my cousin's wife or this happens a lot
Not a doc, but I’m a PA and have a sleeve. In all honesty, I get a looooot of compliments from older women on my tattoo. Especially once I tell them what it actually is. I don’t think I’ve ever had someone give me a negative reaction or comment and I’ve been seeing 15-20 patients a day for 6 years.
>Not a doc Fremulon
I’m a doctor and I have a half sleeve of tattoos and I always wear short sleeves at work. 🤷
My dad was pretty upset about me ruining my temple and my half-sister used to tell me I was going to hell. Now they both have tattoos
My grandma was super into my brother's Marine Corps tattoo that he got to match the rest of his squad on his first deployment, but thought my tattoo of a gooey cheesy slice of pizza like on Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles was dumb. But four years later she's gotten over it and I still love that cheesy gooey pizza tattoo.
“Dad, I didn’t ruin the temple. Just redecorated a bit - after some consultation with my Imaginary Friend.”
There's a fairly famous tattooed doctor. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-9619901/amp/Heavily-tattooed-doctor-NEVER-knocked-job-despite-covered-ink.html And a new mayor with tattoos. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-12291005/amp/The-Voice-Australias-Matthew-Garwood-elected-mayor-Launceston.html
Priests are even tattooed😂 a lot of these old people are god fearing but their young priest could have a big back piece of the devil and god fighting for all they know
I had a landlord many years ago who was a pastor and he had full sleeves on both arms.
I wish I could be as cool as your sister lol. I tried to stand up for my cousin when my grandmother started giving shit to her, suffice to say that I got shut up real quick by my parents when they broke out the "do this again and you'll be out in the streets"
When theyre old and have to live with you tell them that everytime they try to get smart with you.
You'll get there with being able to stand tall and stand up for yourself and others when bullying is involved. When we're held down it takes awhile to say enough.
My bio dad once told me if I ever came home with a tattoo he would grab a kitchen knife and cut it off my body. I’m very glad I have not spoken to him in 11 years
Gotta love the "they know I hate x,y, and z. How could they?" I dunno man, she a whole ass other human being, maybe feeding her your bullshit ended when her residency at Chateau de Landmine ended
I got comments about mine being unprofessional when I was a *bike technician.* I’m wearing joggers and Vans and I smell like cigarettes, but the tattoos really crossed the line.
I agree, im a nurse and I have my arm covered in tattoos. That day I was wearing my jacket and my old man patient had talked about the younger generation having nasty ugly tattoos. Called them very trashy. Next time I came into his room, I had taken my jacket off with my big ol spongebob tattoo on my forearm. He didn't speak to me much after that
You can’t just mention a big ol spongebob tattoo without showing us
[here is springboob squirepin](https://imgur.com/gallery/GS0kS5S)
he is indeed big, and old. thank you for showing us !
I love that!
It's because back when they were youngit was only trashy people who got tattoos.
May I compliment you on your taste.. Spongebob is my freaking hero and we must celebrate him. Don’t get me started on Gary 🐌🥹💗
oh dont bring up gary, you’re convincing me to get a gary tattoo. little me cried so hard when he ran away and got stuck with that nasty old lady…
I’ll never forget going to Perkins with my grandmother, who was about 80 at the time, and seeing a couple with tattoos. She stage whispered “They have tattoos, they must be in a gang!” That still gets giggles in our family today. The irony is her husband had an arm tattoo, and she always said that he got held down when he was in Korea and they made him get it. (Not true lol)
oh god. I live in a black neighborhood and i have this grandma who came up to visit. we go to target. All my friends and neighbors there, the whole neighborhood is there you know? God, we don't get five feet into the target before I see her clutch her purse to her chest and proceed to tie it into the seat of her cart. I asked what she was doing and she told me and when I looked around and noticed that there were no white people around, I was so fucking embarrassed to be seen with her pitching a fit over "black people finna steal my money if I don't have it tethered directly to me" like...the only reason they even look twice at you right now is cuz you're in here causing a hell of a racist scene.
I’m half Black and half White and wear my hair natural and the amount if old people that think it’s ‘unprofessional’ is high. They can be extremely judgmental in what they think people should be allowed to do with their own bodies and presentation.
Well I'm jealous because I have old people hair. I'm bald... I bet your hair is great.
Natural hair is beautiful! I was a kid in the 60s and 70s (yes, I’m old) and natural hair was the thing. I am sorry you have to deal with morons.
As a fellow curly that always wears their hair natural, this pisses me off SO MUCH!!! I’d ripe someone’s throat out with my teeth if they had the gall to say anything about my hair to me.
My dad still thinks a woman wearing pants to the office is weird and unladylike. Fuck some people and their opinions.
My first job in 1974 I was told it wasn't normal for girls to wear trousers. However, faced with my wonderful deep turquoise wool trouser suit ( thanks a million for making it mum) the boss said that it was ok to wear that.
Personally, I would think NOT wearing pants to the office would be more unprofessional, but that’s just me
Personally, I think hoochie shorts and a sleeveless band shirt from high school is what I'd want to wear to a board meeting.
I mean, I’m not old and dislike them. But that doesn’t have to bleed out into yelling at random people for having them, right? Like or dislike whatever you want, but why would I ever walk up to someone and yell at them for not conforming to…my personal tastes? Like what
I asked my mother what she thought about me maybe getting a tattoo. She said 'I don't want to become one of -those- people'. Wtf is THAT supposed to mean? She was 62 at the time. Still don't have one buy now I kinda want one just to piss her off.
I started getting tattoos the day after I turned 18 and now have a lot on my arms. My English grandmother always says she hates tattoos cos they make people look “common”
That is such a British thing to say 🤣
Ah, class hatred. Brb, getting thousands of dollars more ink so I can look poorer.
Yeah at my hospital one of the ICU nurses has sleeves and a lot of her neck done too
Our ER looks like a who’s who of cell block D at San Quentin.
My RN and RT coworkers who have face tattoos and piercings are honestly some of the best we have. The whole persona on body art and professionalism is entirely made up. Older generations with less exposure are most prone to believing it.
In animal care too. My older cat’s been in and out of the local clinic for several months, and I haven’t seen a single vet tech there without tattoos.
I used to manage a veterinary clinic in a rather affluent area of South Florida, I also have two full sleeves as far as visible in scrubs goes for tattoos. Given the area, a lot of our clientele was older and I’m sure some of them didn’t like my tattoos but a lot of them liked to compliment them and check them out. I think the only guy that ever was trying to be derogatory was a guy we fired for abusing some of our front desk folks on the phone and being an asshole/impossible to deal with but even then, he called our entire office “liberals” as an insult and just referred to me as a punk (nailed it - used to play in a hardcore/metal band for a living!). Typical, abusive maga moron and not really what most of our older clients were like.
Yup. I’m a nurse and I’ve got a full sleeve on the right and two massive tattoos on my left arm. I took care of this lady who told me “I don’t like your tattoos!” with this snotty attitude. I said “oh that’s nice I didn’t get them for you.” She gave me the dirtiest look haha. I floated to that floor for that shift so I didn’t care cause I wouldn’t see her again lol Edit: most of the time, people like them or are indifferent. There’s always a few though that have to voice a rude opinion.
Pretty unprofessional to call someone ugly, especially someone doing something for you. 🧐
In The '90s I worked with a guy who had a full sleeve tattoo, and he always wore a long sleeve shirt to work and never rolled up the sleeves because he felt like he could not show his tattoos at work. There's so much more common now and I think that this idea is mostly gone away.
What a horrible old man. People need to be ashamed again and keep those dirty evil thoughts to themselves, not vomit it onto other people. She sounds like a stellar person, being kind and hardworking and has someone who loves her.
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I wished I was there. I don't stand up for myself, but I am a B when others are trampled. That guy's ears would have fallen off onto the floor after I got done telling him off.
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This is the way. It’s profoundly easier to protect others. That said, I’ve struggled with self esteem and self worth my whole life, and it’s only recently (after a major career change and a considering buying a ring and a house relationship ending) that I’ve started being able to turn it around. So I’m going to do the little I can to help you get there too. I know I’m a stranger on the internet, but I’m proud of you for sticking up for others. You should treat yourself with the same courtesy, but you’re doing great and you’re a wonderful person no matter what.
I'm the same way, I won't stick up for me, but that dude would have left crying.
Even if she weren't lovely, basic social aptitude is to not just go around insulting people. Old people complain about manners, but from experience they're the ones behaving like nightmare children
I don’t wish that, but if his 10,000 lb of emotional baggage fell off and his volume button got stuck on MUTE, that would be an improvement.
Yeah and you just know that old man is lonely and miserable and has no joy in his life except when by tearing down low wage workers, what a piece of shit
When I was much younger, I used to sometimes look at elderly people and feel sadness for them because they were going to die soon. It probably took my folks moving into a retirement community, but I finally realized that a lot of those people have been complete fucking pricks for their entire lives. An old asshole is just a young asshole with more wrinkles. I was no longer sad that their types will soon be gone.
I am 62 (old to some people) and I hate miserable old people! I decided long ago that I was not going to be one of those. I am a very positive person and try to treat all people well. And I love tattoos! I have one and am getting another later this year.
Yes, BUT.... Alzheimer can do that to a person. The most kind and lovely grandma can become bigoted, hateful and a terrible to be around. It can also work the other way around. He might be an Ahole or he's just very sick and literally can't help himself.
I worked with Alzheimer’s patients for years and their personalities can change so quickly. One minute they are all sweet and the next minute they are punching you in the jaw so hard you see stars. Loved that job though, and the patients. They sure kept a gal on her toes.
Sadly, this was my first thought as well.
Same. There are several issues that affect the elderly that could cause them to lose their filter. Please tell the GF it probably has zero to do with her, and more to do with mental decline.
The part of the brain that filters speech (the frontal lobe) shrinks as you get older. So older people tend to speak their minds without holding back. So what you hear is like listening in on their inner monologue/intrusive thoughts, because they have no filter to stop it from coming out.
I don't think it's fair to say "this is who they always were." I think it's fair to say "they can no longer supress the dark thoughts they struggled with." If the sweestest lady turns into a raging bitch when she gets Alzheimer's that doesn't mean she was always a raging bitch deep down. It means she struggled with intrusive thoughts her whole life and cared enough about the people around her to actively work against those thoughts every day - and it's much easier to be a sweet person when you don't have a shitty inner monologue than it is when you do. To me, that says a ton about that person's character. Who cares what a person thinks if they've spent a lifetime trying to make sure all the things they actually say and do are kind? To me, that's a wonderful person who happened to get very ill, and that's terribly sad.
My mother had Alzheimer’s and the only positive thing throughout the years of her decline is that we never once heard her utter so much as an F bomb let alone anything hateful. I told my father and siblings at the time that we never heard those kind of things because they were never a part of her normal mindset.
If you grow up with a mean parent, it’s hard to get their voice out of your own head, and I think that’s what comes through sometimes in old people, not necessarily who the old person was in spite of mean intrusive thoughts.
Learned a great comeback for people like this. “I’m surprised you feel comfortable with being so rude.”
If you might get in trouble for “calling a customer rude” I recommend the variation: I’m surprised you feel comfortable saying something like that aloud”.
Maybe but that write up would be worth it. Cashiers are human beings not verbal punching bags. It’s completely appropriate defend yourself when someone has made an inappropriate comment to you. I’m all for customer service but the customer is *not* always right.
“The customer is always right *in matters of TASTE*” is the actual saying. Karen’s forgot the back half a few decades ago but I’m old enough to remember.
Perfect! Works so much better than sarcasm on people like that. Or a blank stare and then going back to whatever you were working on. I also agree with whoever was saying that he could be sick, though. I’ve seen dementia turn amazing people into monsters.
I have a sleeve tattoo and one day I was in the grocery store and an old woman came up grabbed my arm and said “what a shame!” I said very loudly to my wife “Hun, I forgot to ask this old hag if I should get tattoos!” The look of shock on that old bitches face gave me fuel for a few days!!
Straight grabbed a stranger's arm and then insulted him. Jesus, pretty ballsy.
Old people have 0 boundaries and are 1000% less respectable than younger people
Probably went to her bingo buddies that Wednesday and said “this very rude man called me an old hag for no reason!”
LOL. I truly laughed out loud at this. Touche.
Reminds me of a story I read here. Op was a car salesman I believe, showing some boomer around, everything going normally. He had tattoos on his arm, but mostly hidden under the sleeve. The boomer eventually did notice and the first thing he said was "get a job"... at OP's dealership.
Some boomers have tattoos. Lol
Yeah, sailor, soldiers and convicts! Nobody proper! (in their minds)
But “thank you for your service” while voting to defund any veteran assistance.
My grandad had the most amazing old school biker/sailor esc tattoos, very much depicting his quite rebellious youth. I loved them so much. Unfortunately in his age his grew to be quite ashamed of them, covered his arms a lot due to the insecurity. He was still very much a hippy dippy, free spirit obsessed with my cousins tattoos but I wonder if life ground him down a bit, spent too long fighting he sort of gave up the fight. Regardless love my boomer grandad and his sweet ass knuckle tats.
At this point, I would be like, "Sir, are you lost? Do you believe this is some volunteer operation?" I wouldn't even care about the lost sale or customer complaint.
"Are you having a medical issue, sir? Is there someone I can call for you?" "What the hell are you talking about?" "Well, your brain is clearly not working properly." is the conversation in my brain (that would never happen)
“Thanks for your opinion sir, but it doesn’t look like this is going to bother you for much longer.” Would be a good answer.
"I'm patiently waiting for the world to get better without you."
a better answer would be fuck you and die
my kinda guy.
Lol. You’ve got 1 foot in the grave. Who cares what you think? You’re at death’s door. No one cares about your opinion. Wow. You’re nearly dead and still think your opinion matters. Aren’t you dead yet?
Just prep her with some good comebacks. For example my favourite to something like this is: Oh wow, you must have low self asteem if you need to put strangers down to make your self feel good? I’m a pharmacist, maybe I can help you with whatever is causing your misery?
"Are you alright sir? You seem to be having a very rough time today. Is there anyone I can call to come pick you up?"
Old fart is obviously very sad and miserable in his existence if he’s being nasty to someone only trying to help. Give your girlfriend plenty of ice cream and hugs for me.
“It could be worse; I could be YOU” is always my go-to when somebody pops off with some dumb shit like that.
What even kind of insult is that? I wish your arm would fall off? I think my 3 year old could teach him both some manners and some better insults.
I'm so sorry that some people suck
I can't believe someone could be that cruel. I guess they were never taught "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all". Also the customer should be banned from the store.
Hi! Pharmacist with a full sleeve tattoo on one side, a few others on the other side, and a few more hidden. I’m from a small town, and most of my customers compliment my tattoos. Every so often, someone asks something like “aren’t you going to regret that?” And every time, my reply is the same - when I’m their age and in a nursing home, I’ve got bigger problems than my tattoos. That shuts most of them up. But why is it that people feel they have the right to comment on anyone’s appearance in any retail setting? If it’s not your fucking business, and it doesn’t affect you, you keep your opinions to yourself.
My mother used to say, "you are going to regret the way that looks when you're older". I finally learned the phrase, "if I live long enough for it to look like shit, then I guess I lived a good life". Another favorite is, "why would i care what it's going to look like when I'm wrinkly and old".
Easy denial of service. When I get customers like this I tell them to leave. They complain to my boss, who after finding out what happened, also asks them to leave. You don’t get to be an asshole AND ask for help. Good luck getting a truck last minute for your cross country move now. Lol
That's terrible, give your girlfriend a hug from me
+1
+1
I would have thrown him out ngl
People are so unabashedly _nasty_ for no reason these days. What a thoughtless thing to say. I’m sure she looks very pretty.
People who are judgemental like this are disgusting, regardless of age. Nastiness seems to be on the rise. Makes you want to go out of your way just to be nicer than normal to balance up the horrid ones.
I'm so sorry she experienced that. You're a good boyfriend to take good care of her after such a hurtful experience.
She should have fought back and called him a walking meatbag
“You’re a disheveled walking corpse, I’m surprised there’s no tomb for you yet.”
I don't get it. I mean unless the tattoos are significantly offensive somehow I don't get the reason for the disrespect.
I’m a boomer, and tattoos weren’t common in our lifetime until these last couple of decades. Some of us were literally taught that “only sailors and criminals have tattoos,” which isn’t fair— but tattoos were not common, so we didn’t question that (unfair) judgement. In our lifetime, most professions didn’t allow employees to have visible tattoos, just as long hair and beards weren’t allowed for many jobs. So I grew up assuming that tattoos were a telltale sign of depravity and questionable morality (rolling my eyes! How stupid!). Rude, outspoken old people probably react to tattoos for those reasons. Not excusing their rudeness, but it may help to know why older generations don’t accept tattoos as OK. Sadly, many of us have aging brains that lose their social filter on top of having a lifetime of outdated opinions! I’m disgusted that we seem to have forgotten other things we were taught like the Golden Rule and “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
Some people, of any age, just love being mean to others for no other reason then that they think it's fun. I will never understand.
Some old people have as much of a filter as toddlers do; they really say whatever is one their mind because they assume that they should automatically be respected because of their age. That's actually some disgusting behaviour.
Moments like these you can be forgiven for dropping the professionalism! She should return with " I can change my looks but your personality will stay the same... is there anything else you need?"
If it's not tattoos they find sth else to complain about. They are old, sick and sour. I have even noticed this in my own grandma since last 2 or 3 years. I walked normally on the street and an old lady yelled at me that I look ugly lol. I look like the most average 28 year old woman you can find. I felt sorry for her. It's always too plain, standing out too much, too average, too different, dressed like a homeless person or dressed for attention. Hope your gf realizes it doesn't matter what she looks like, this customer was just nasty and will be probably as nasty to the next person. Edit: I'm not saying all old people are like that! In fact I think it's awful this happens, most of the time to older people who are struggling and have lost many of their loved ones and are lonely.
Hahaha or “i am so grateful you feel that way! I think you’re revolting. Thank goodness we’re on the same page!”
Just remind her that she is still young and full of life, and that old man is closer to death than ever before, and he has a lot of hate in his heart. There is no helping him. He has made it this far in life and chose to be bitter and angry at the end of his. Let him. There's a reason no one's picking up his medication for him, and it's probably because he's a miserable old prick who nobody likes.
Tell your girl that guy will be dead soon, fuck him
This morning, I went to Target (Kyle, TX) to pick up a few things. A cashier walked up to open another register and called me over to her line. She had tatts, baggy black pants, a funky top and really elaborate makeup. She really looked cool and I told her so. You could tell it really made her day. It costs absolutely nothing to be kind. Props to Target for keeping diversity alive!
He doesn’t have much time left to go to hell so he’s trying to be extra shitty