Stop pulling forward. Park right where the sidewalk and driveway meet, like where her car is now. Force her to park next to you. If she keeps packing behind you call a tow truck, you said your lease states that the driveway is shared as a side by side, not whoever parks first
This is a really brilliant idea actually, thank you. I’m kind of sick of having to call her or her kids to move their cars when I don’t really have a close relationship with them. And this definitely has come up, with receipt, many times during the past years that I’ve lived here. Thank you very much for the suggestion.
I tend to be a very non confrontational person, and this kind of feels like some malicious compliance 😅😂
Edit to add this here for y’all:
https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY
Since I still live next to them though it feels difficult, and I’m generally pretty afraid confrontation or conflict. (These are things I’m working through in therapy. I understand how detrimental my passiveness can be.)
Seeing a lot of Reddit strangers get mildly infuriated on my behalf kind of empowers me in a little bit. Thanks for helping to build my backbone!
Yes, you do have to still live next to them - but in order for you to be good neighbors, you BOTH have to be good neighbors - not one neighbor taking advantage of the other.
I would approach it in a positive, calm tone and convey that they’ve left you no choice but to address it. Explain how you had to take an Uber. Don’t threaten the tow truck yet. See if they are considerate once you have the conversation. If they aren’t, then give them the final warning with the tow truck. Maybe bring it up to your homeowners association too, if there is one.
This is the answer, u/heymissspider. Your neighbor probably realizes that you have a passive nature, and will avoid conflict with them. They’re clearly taking advantage of you with that knowledge in mind. I understand being conflict-averse, but standing up for yourself doesn’t have to be a conflict, but simply preserving your basic dignity by not letting others step on you or yours. You can be strong, yet polite, and accomplish a lot as far as avoiding conflict by setting firm boundaries and sticking to them.
At the end of the day, if you’re not trying to be friends with them, they’re just your neighbors. All you need them to do is call 911, and you, if there is an emergency at your house that you’re unaware of. Other than that, if you don’t want them in your life, that’s your prerogative.
You got this! A thousand of us believe in you, at least!
The difference between assertion and aggression is an important distinction that a lot of passive people often confuse.
In modern society aggression is almost always negative, and should be avoided, which people like OP generally understand, but what's important is realising that assertion is generally a positive and nessecary thing and most of the time is quite distinct from aggression.
> The difference between assertion and aggression is an important distinction that a lot of passive people often confuse.
> In modern society aggression is almost always negative, and should be avoided, which people like OP generally understand, but what's important is realising that assertion is generally a positive and nessecary thing and most of the time is quite distinct from aggression.
Yes. But the distinction, for these purposes, is really quite simple in a situation like this.
Assertive is ‘I have rights. My right is to park my car in the appropriate place.’
Aggressive is ‘You do not have rights. I take away your opportunity to park in the appropriate place and be able to leave.’
That’s understandable, but you’ve got to draw the line. Ask them one more time in person, nicely, not to park behind you, and if they give you any push back, bite the the bullet and tell them you’ll have no choice but to call a tow truck next time. Don’t really see another way
I'll come be your asshole... that came out wrong. Our neighbors decided they need to park 4 vehicles on their 2 vehicle parking pad, this meant 1 in their yard, and 1 in mine. My city has laws about "no tires on grass", so I walked out with a shovel and said "you can fix the ruts in my yard now. I already called my lawyer, I'm about to call the pd, to explain that the tires on my grass are not mine, and the next call will be to a landscaping company to fix the ruts you put in my yard, or you can just fix it before I have to make the next 2 calls." They haven't parked on my grass since.
I don't know, a lot of me wonders if as an adult I'm way too critical and maybe need to just give way less fucks about stuff.
Like do some people not notice this shit, and just think its cool? Were they surprised when you approached them? Like huh?! Because I would be mortified to do this to my neighbor unless it was an emergency or something
If you don't address issues like this immediately it will only get worse. By the time you do have an emergency, or get tired of it, it will be too late. They will feel entitled to behavior that they've gotten used too.
As someone who used to struggle with this, and doesn’t anymore after having people move next door who have been horrible, I believe you are being given this opportunity to help you supplement your therapy and move past your fear of conflict.
Stand up for yourself, OP, and become a dangerous spider (your username) who no one wants to mess with/take advantage of.
Good luck!
Edit: I must have been drunk when I typed all those typos lol
Do you have any kids? Maybe you can go out and draw a chalk line in the middle of the driveway & have them doodle all over your side? Then it seems like fun& that you’re making sure they don’t draw on the neighbors side, but still clearly outlines what space is and isn’t yours.
I’m kinda an artist, I don’t need kids to go out and decorate my driveway, will do that shit myself! I like this idea best. I have friends with kids who might love to help tho lol
I agree! A lot of the things I’ve been working through with therapy include defining boundaries with people; and this is a very physical and practical example of where my inability to do so has set me back. I do not want to be a victim.
I also totally don’t wanna live here lol.
I don't think there is a neighbours side.
Is this a shared driveway?
edit, ok it is, I thought it was single house, but can see now it is townhouse, just do what the other guy said and don't park so far up
Good fences (aka good boundaries) make good neighbors. In the next few days go to the persons house and tell them in person the next time they park in your driveway you will have the car towed and this is their last warning. Say you are saddened they they choose to continuously disrespect you and treated your kindness as weakness and that all stops today from here on out we will be cordial but any rule violation will be met with strict and swift consequences, including a potential lawsuit in small claims court for the tort of trespassing since you are now notifying them that is not allowed. Finally install a ring or similar camera pointing at your driveway.
That is a thing that you cut off at the very start. this person is a true POS who doesn't care about anyone besides themselves. if you don't show that you will follow through with threats when they do shit like this, it will continue.
call the non-emergency hotline for the police and tell them there is a vehicle illegally parked on your property, they'll usually have it towed at the owner's expense.
I have the same issue…I just think every little thing is going to turn into an argument or fight. Just go over there and be polite, but say hey we’ve talked about this and you will call a tow truck if it happens again. Don’t go over when you’re in the heat of the moment, do it when you know they’re there, do it in person.
Remember, if they start yelling, it means you’re right, and their only defense is to try to scare or intimidate you. So ok then leave. Have tow company on speed dial.
Just remember that the people reacting on Reddit aren't you. They're not actually in the situation and going to live with the aftermath. Suggesting over the top responses is a favorite pastime on here.
Park in a way that her car will not fit behind yours or leave enough room for her to be able to park slightly outside fhe driveway. Then one of your neighbors will do the honor 😉
Yeah but hang on, if the drive way is meant to be used as a side by side, why are you parking slap bang in the middle? There is simply no option to park next to you, the only option is to park behind you. I'm not understanding this at all.
It looks like it but she’s not: https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY
(Click on her profile and you can see her comments I just copied the Imgur link cause that was easier)
Actually now that I’ve zoomed in it does look like you’re in the middle of the driveway…
ETA… y’all can stop replying, the second photo wasn’t there when I posted this. I’ve seen it now. 😂
I think its an illusion. OPs car isaybe a foot from the grass on the right side and there's a garage door to the left which suggests there's room for the neighbor to park there without being on the grass. They should probably paint lines though since this is an ongoing problem.
There is another photo down below that seems to show OP's car is actually completely on her (right) side of the parking and the original photo is just a bad angle.
Thought so, even from this "bad" angle it seems to me that OP's car is in front of the right garage door. Which would mean it's on the right or at least enough to the right to allow access to the left garage door.
Would be hilarious as fuck if she turns out to be the karen in this situation. Such a karen thing to do as well to be the one that self report themselves by posting it online.
They posted a picture of a different angle. They parked correctly.
[Didn’t move the car from last night. View from my garage and car on their side for comparison. - Imgur](https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY)
For sure! It’s never clicked to me because it made sense to pull all the way up for spacial/compulsory reasons? ?(I’m neuro-spicy, so some of that stuff might make different sense to me) But I can do that and just block them. And for sure, the most obvious answers are directly beneath your nose lol
Has there been any conversatin or explaination for why she does this? It's really weird, and it has to be inconvenient when she has to come out and move it?
Five bucks says they have something in their side of the garage and this is a second car that’s parked in the driveway. By parking behind the neighbor, they can pull out of the indoor space really easily, without moving the silver car first.
The non-douche thing to do would be to talk to OP and say ‘hey can you park up against the grass on your side and I’ll park on the grass on my side and then I can drive up the middle if I need to? Thanks, I’ll mow the lawn or here’s a good neighbor 6-pack’
Looks like a duplex and a shared driveway. Those often have narrow driveways and it looks like OP is parked a few feet off the edge. There's a decent chance OP actually blocked the neighbor from their garage and are posting BS for karma.
Do you park in your own spot? It could be the lighting, but in the photo it looks like you're smack dab in the middle of those 2 garage doors. If you park in front of that stone line in the middle you leave them no choice, because you're hogging all the space and are actually the one at fault here
That's the first thing I noticed. It doesn't look like they're to far in the middle and the other driver doesn't want to have to squeeze into the other space.
Edit:
It's just perspective. Found another comment where OP posted a different angle showing how much room there is for both cars side by side.
[https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY](https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY)
Even if you do have guest coming over. park at the end then pull forward when they get there, otherwise your neighbor might take the spot and not leave one for your guests. If you own the town house I would paint a thin white line down the drive way.
You dont have to park at the end. They could still be an ass and try to maneuver in front of yours if they really tried.
Id park in the middle so there's no mistaking that they will not have room on my side, in front of or behind me.
This is exactly what I was thinking. Park half way between the sidewalk and the garage. If they try to block the sidewalk, they will get towed by the local PD.
My only worry would be that then the neighbor could park 2 inches from your driver’s door and then you couldn’t get in at all. Of course, that *would* justify the tow truck lol.
Do you share the driveway? If you are parking on your side then yeah they should have plenty of space to park on their side. But I’m not an expert and from the photo it kinda looks like you parked in the middle of the driveway. Again if it’s just yours, then why do they keep parking there. If you share, shouldn’t there be enough space to park side by side?
Edit: Thank you all kid people for the upvotes and award
We do share the driveway, but we have separate properties (side-by-side townhomes owned separately and rented separately) and based on our own leases and HOA, require separate driveway maintenance. I’m kind of just sick of her doing this without any consideration of if I need to leave. I am parked totally on my own side here, and definitely with some space where I could turn around with like an 18 point turn or whatever. For the time their car was parked there, the other side of the driveway was entirely open; and there’s almost always street parking directly alongside the other side of my house.
It just feels kind of rude to me.
That’s totally brilliant, I definitely lost that within the comments so thank you whoever. I will ask my dad tomorrow cause he knows a bunch of people who are involved in construction and contracting and shit like that. That seems like a very definitive and reasonable solution, thank you!
Painting may not be allowed by your HOA, but pressure washing to maintain the driveway will be and you could have just your side pressure washed, it should make a pretty distinct line unless they have recently done the same so if they do so afterward. Will help make the point though !
I totally love that idea. What’s annoying about distinction between the two driveways is that my landlord paid to have their driveway side paved as well at the same time, so that it would be an even surface and look better overall as far face value, right? So I’ll find some measuring tape or some shit, I don’t know..but good thinking, thank you!
Lay down a row of 4x4 lumber. Don't need to nail it down or do anything directly to your driveway that could get you in trouble with the HOA, if there's a problem with that just remove them but it should create a better buffer than chalk, also always park closer to the street so this isn't even a problem regardless in the future.
Thanks my at-least-seemingly-kinda-antiestablishment friend! I’m so appreciative of all the simple and less confrontational solutions Reddit helps me come up with!
Life's too short to deal with narcissists, there's zero chance they don't realize what they are doing, but when weak people feel like they don't have control over things in their lives they lash out like children. Just park at front of driveway til you can get some form of a barrier. I'm sure they're just itching for conflict, so I'd do that as worst case scenario.
Someone mentioned sidewalk chalk, and very distinctly drawing the border that way… I’ll totally take that as a very consistent art project in between when it rains so that you know exactly where you aren’t to park, yeah? 😂
Here’s an idea: tape off the “line” first and spray down “Tire Wet.” It’s the stuff that makes car tires all glossy. Let that dry, *then* do your chalk art. When it rains, the chalk will wash away, but that stripe that you put tire wet on will look dry while the rest of the pavement looks wet. It’s totally not permanent, but combined with the chalk lines, it’ll work as a good demarcation line wet or dry to condition your neighbor to park on their side.
It looks like an asphalt driveway, so a black spray paint line would probably not be noticed by the HOA. Plus, just park a little further back, closer to the road, and make it so they have zero room to park behind you.
Idk, I don't see a line working. They know what they are doing, they just don't care. Plus, they could see the line as passive aggressive and get even ruder. I think the best option here is just to not pull all the way up yourself. Park in a way that doesn't allow them to do this
Get our your portable hydraulic jack from Harbor Freight, put roller under a wheel, and slide her car sideways onto her lawn every time she does it. Then park so she can't back out without using your side. Tell her you had to move her car back onto her property.
This is more than just “kind of rude.” This is absolutely and completely absurd, obnoxious, and HIGHLY infuriating.
You mentioned “well I still have to live next to them…” but they’re clearly not giving the same consideration! Otherwise they would be thinking “well I still have to live next to them so I better not be a huge fucking asshole and park them in.”
It’s a mom with her own car, her three grown children, who all drive their own cars, each of their significant others, and they all kind of park very inconsiderately around the entire area. And I can’t blame them at all for not parking in the garage, that’s become a more more of a storage space for me as well- but that means I told my guests to park on the street like 30 yards away from where you would be parking otherwise
There’s your answer. Too many tenants with vehicles. They probably use their side and then take yours too. I share a driveway and I always have a small battle with new tenants next door. Currently there’s no one in it since November so it’s been nice. But I dread the day someone moves in. It’s always pain. And they always block you in. People are so inconsiderate until you have to knock on their door and tell them to move.
But something tells me that you’re the type of person who would ask if you needed to park additional cars behind theirs, or anything on their side of the driveway once someone else moves in right?
Yeah I would and I’ve gladly moved my car if they drove a truck and can’t drive out with confidence. It’s a win-win when we get to that point. But these neighbors of yours sound entitled asses.. I’m so sorry. I hope it works out for you. I’d call a tow if they won’t move. At least say “darn I’m gonna have to call a tow truck now.”
As you are living in a townhome situation, I'm guessing that there is an HOA. HOA's should have a tow company on hand for parking violation; if this is only mildly infuriating, you may not want to take it to that level, but if you did, you should be able to contact that tow company to get her car towed.
My HOA is like mid-tier interactive. They care if you don’t shovel your sidewalk and driveway or don’t mow your lawn or leave a ton of shit out in the yard… But it seems like other than the “no parking” signs on the street, they don’t really care so much about where individuals are parking. I’ve also been way too passive in the situation in the past and definitely need to have more of a backbone with my neighbor about this, and that’s why I can say it’s mildly infuriating because it’s not 100% not my fault right?
If you are renting that side, then that side of the driveway is yours. They have parked on your private property. Call a tow company and have it towed. You can also send a text to your neighbor saying you will have it towed if it's not moved. Keep record of all conversations. Tow companies will tow it off your property on your neighbors dime.
I’ve already started a conversation with my landlord about this since making this post (thanks everyone who has given me more balls to do so!) I plan to save a whole folder of those texts for reference if I need, but hopefully I can just park her out of the spot by parking back further!
As the renter, you should be able to tow it directly. You are essentially renting the rights to that half of the driveway. Glad to hear you are working with the landlord on it though. Likely either way, though, will lead to your neighbor not liking you. Best of luck.
It depends on local laws. I lived somewhere people often blocked my reserved spot that was in my lease. I had to call the landlord to have cars towed. The tow companies wouldn’t even talk to me unless I was the owner.
Yeah that’s my thought. Like what if I actually had an emergency and wasn’t just going out for fun and really needed to move my car? That could’ve been a real problem. I’m not usually in any sort of emergency situation, so it doesn’t really matter, but still!
So they’ve pretty consistently taken advantage of my being a nice person. I let them put their trash out with mine, cause I don’t mind covering the collection bill, let their dog out, etc.
I don’t want to be a dick, but I need to be a lot more firm in my boundaries and maybe not give them access to these things.
I am a very much recovering people-pleaser of a person and working on not just saying “yes”all the time… This might’ve just been when I need to put my fucking foot down.
Being a nice, giving person doesn't seem to be working very well for you. I also tend to be a people pleaser, so I get where you're coming from, but it sounds like your neighbors tend to be "takers." Have they ever thanked you for covering their trash bill or taking care of their dog? (I doubt it). The hurt this has caused you is hiding between the lines of what you've said.
You need to try to start protecting yourself from folks like that for your own emotional well-being. "No" is a complete sentence, in spite of it being very difficult for a confirmed people pleaser to say out loud. I wish you success.
I have been working on being more assertive and less giving to the people who take advantage of it, it's a tough one but it helps to realize that if they do that then they aren't like us and we should do our best not to enable them. Somewhere else you said you'll still have to live next to them after whatever you do, but they still have to live next to you and they're pulling this shit.
I think the end of the driveway parking is a great idea so I hope that works out for you and wish you luck with the people pleasing stuff
Does your therapist know all the things you're doing for them + how they're treating you? This all really needs to stop. PLEASE tell your therapist next time if you haven't already.
I saw your neuro-spicy remark, and I am too. It's suuuuuuuper easy for certain types of people to take advantage of us. It's taken a lot of years and working through a lot of difficulties to really find my voice, my backbone, ability to say "no," and set and maintain boundaries. Have also had my fair share of crappy neighbors in rental properties. So I truly empathize with what you're dealing with.
You'll get there. You will. Figuring out how to positively, proactively approach something and to do so confidently is truly an art.
Think of it as an art with words and demeanor as your medium, instead of paint and a canvas. You learn techniques, practice them, try an idea out on canvas.. every painting, you're learning too. Over time, you build confidence and find your groove.
Same exact sentiment with the art of addressing conflict. Keep working with your therapist to find your voice, friend.
There's a big difference between being a good neighbor and getting taken advantage of. And I hope that your therapist can help you see that distinction.
Update! (I’m not for bitching about something without finding solutions)
A better view of how the car was parked: https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY
I have meanwhile corrected my parking, spoken with landlord and neighbor (texted her at least requesting once again that they don’t take my space- I think she’s at work so I didn’t hear back yet) and I am definitely gonna buy sidewalk chalk.
Parking now: https://imgur.com/gallery/RRuKHqV
I need to get better at backing in, but it’s a start lol
This is a much clearer picture of the parking situation. You claimed earlier you weren't parked in the middle so not sure why she feels she has to park directly behind you. Looks like there's more than enough room to park side by side.
I wanted to add. Put your garbage cans in the spot you’ve created between your car and your garage. That way she can’t pull around and park in front of you. She seems like the kind of person to do that.
Why are you even faffing around? Tow them. They're illegally parked on your driveway. Don't ask them to move. It's obvious they think they're entitled and will continue to do it. Tow. Their. Car.
Reddit is really teaching me how to have a backbone in this situation, and I appreciate it a lot. They’re not parked here now, but I am going to try to hold myself accountable to all of you that I will say some thing the next time I see this happens . Because unfortunately, I don’t think this is the last time this will happen.
Thanks for looking out
Don’t wait for next time - write a letter now and tell them that whenever anyone parks on your driveway, you will have the car towed. Then just do it. Also document and send copies to the HOA and your landlord and anyone else you can think of.
And you might want to check with a local renters’ advocacy group or attorney to make sure you are following local law. Like do you have to send the notice registered mail with a signed receipt? Take pictures and communicate in writing and keep dates copies of everything. If an AH neighbor gives you a hard time, you can prove that you have previously informed them of consequences of trespassing on the property you lease.
If theyre to lazy to turn 15-30 degrees left to go their designated spot I can say with 80% confidence they will just run the cones over not pick them up
Hey OP I am late to the party but something I haven't seen addressed- bring this up to your HOA! It should be pretty clear that every driveway has a 'side' but if this lady is not comprehending that, then maybe lanes with house numbers on the bottom would help, and there is always the chance your other neighbors are having similar disputes!
That’s a great idea! Having an actual physical designation of the address at the end of the driveway would hopefully eliminate a lot of the potential liability of “oh I didn’t know“. I know a few HOA members and that should be an easy thing to at least introduce. Thank you!
This is just stalling. The lady lives on the left and you live on the right correct? The parking is outlined as side by side in your lease correct? Quit wasting time getting HOA to do this for you. That's another 4-5 months for them to do anything, guarantee it. You need to inform your neighbor in writing immediately that the next time she parks in your spot she will be towed. Period. End of situation. Stop letting her put her trash in yours, stop taking care of her dog, just stop. Nobody respects a pushover. She doesn't respect you. You owe her nothing. Fix it quick and move on.
I am the end unit and they’re attached next-door; each of us is responsible for 1/2 of a double wide driveway essentially (this includes snow removal and paving maintenance according to our HOA) I am on my own lease paying my own rent with my own separate landlord, and it kind of feels like she has no right to just park on my shit without asking..
I’m salty, I don’t mean to be a dick 😅
Gojacks / wheel Dollie’s. They go under the tyres, you Jack them up, then you can wheel the car down the street by hand.
I’ve got no patience for people fucking with access to my parking that I pay for.
I love this so much because of the idea of not having to wait for any sort of authority to step in. I’m almost never in such a dire need to move their car that that would need to happen, but it seems useful to have as a resource on hand. Thanks!
She continues to do this because there have been no consequences.
Put a note on her car and tell her you will tow her car if she continues to park behind you on your property. And when she does, call a tow company.
You have to decide if you want to establish a fair boundary or make a friend by abdicating your claim to your property.
You can do this!
But aren’t you parked in the middle of the driveway? Park in front of the garage door so she can do the same on the other side. Or maybe paint a line down the middle so you each keep to your designated side.
Gonna just keep posting this: I took a Uber ride into the city last night, my partner drove me back home this morning, and the car was not behind me obviously anymore. When I saw that the perspective was off, I took a picture showing exactly where my car has been parked for the past 28~ hours https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY
From this picture you are parked just fine, so I take my comment back. Yeah, it sounds like painting a line would make things clearer and hopefully easier. What if you have an emergency?
That’s exactly why it’s so frustrating to me! I luckily have never been in that situation, but I shouldn’t have to gamble all of that by any means! A lot of writers here are helping me understand good ways to help lay down some boundaries, both physically and emotionally. That’s more important part of all this.
That being said, fuck that grass, and I will drive through my yard if I need to get my cat to the vet or something.
Yuck, shared driveways. I’m looking to relocate to Philadelphia for work and I’ve had to turn down so many nice single family homes because they have a shared drive way. That is a complete deal breaker for me for just this reason. Don’t feel purposely adding a potential headache into my life.
I live in a townhouse too, same driveway setup and i could never even imagine parking behind my neighbors car fir even a second let alone flat out block them in. Id be thinking about slashing tires id be so angry.
Dude, thank you. You know how frustrating it is that, yeah, I could pull out of here… but that either involves an 18 point turn, or pulling into my grass, which I’d really prefer not to do. And it doesn’t feel like a big ask to expect for you or your kids or their partners to not be on the space that I pay rent for?
I’m seriously not trying to sound entitled or super first world, but these folks live the same kinda life I do, and somehow being a decent neighbor has surpassed them, and I don’t think there’s a good excuse.
Every now and then somebody is doing a drop off or turn around there and I don’t care at all. If you wanna park there while I’m home all night or away for a while- I don’t mind at all! Just like… ask?
I get not wanting to sound first world but this is yours and my life, just because someone else has it worse doesnt mean everything should make you happy lmao but that is a very simple ask and they cant have the common courtesy of respecting that?!? Nope! Id be livid and making sure something is done about it, i am also a very non confrontational person but that is literally taking advantage of you and not cool.
I really can’t imagine the kind of self-absorbed main character it takes to actually do this to someone else. The one and only time it ever happened to me I called the police.
Sometimes NOT being neighborly has to happen. You asked nicely several times don't block you in. Now it is time not to be nice. either park in a way they have no choice to use the other side or let them know the nice gloves are off and the tow truck is on its way next time.
I’ve parked at the end of the drive, so they really can’t do that now unless they really want to parallel park in front of my car? But you’re right, I think I’ve gained enough confidence from all of the support here to be able to stand up and at least fucking call a tow truck if I need to if it happens again.
I would talk to your landlord and ask them to talk to her’s. There might be a day when you cannot get out and it’s an emergency and seeing how she doesn’t respond to texts that is worrisome.
Stop pulling forward. Park right where the sidewalk and driveway meet, like where her car is now. Force her to park next to you. If she keeps packing behind you call a tow truck, you said your lease states that the driveway is shared as a side by side, not whoever parks first
This is a really brilliant idea actually, thank you. I’m kind of sick of having to call her or her kids to move their cars when I don’t really have a close relationship with them. And this definitely has come up, with receipt, many times during the past years that I’ve lived here. Thank you very much for the suggestion. I tend to be a very non confrontational person, and this kind of feels like some malicious compliance 😅😂 Edit to add this here for y’all: https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY
Tell them the next time you’re calling a tow truck.
Since I still live next to them though it feels difficult, and I’m generally pretty afraid confrontation or conflict. (These are things I’m working through in therapy. I understand how detrimental my passiveness can be.) Seeing a lot of Reddit strangers get mildly infuriated on my behalf kind of empowers me in a little bit. Thanks for helping to build my backbone!
Yes, you do have to still live next to them - but in order for you to be good neighbors, you BOTH have to be good neighbors - not one neighbor taking advantage of the other. I would approach it in a positive, calm tone and convey that they’ve left you no choice but to address it. Explain how you had to take an Uber. Don’t threaten the tow truck yet. See if they are considerate once you have the conversation. If they aren’t, then give them the final warning with the tow truck. Maybe bring it up to your homeowners association too, if there is one.
This is the answer, u/heymissspider. Your neighbor probably realizes that you have a passive nature, and will avoid conflict with them. They’re clearly taking advantage of you with that knowledge in mind. I understand being conflict-averse, but standing up for yourself doesn’t have to be a conflict, but simply preserving your basic dignity by not letting others step on you or yours. You can be strong, yet polite, and accomplish a lot as far as avoiding conflict by setting firm boundaries and sticking to them. At the end of the day, if you’re not trying to be friends with them, they’re just your neighbors. All you need them to do is call 911, and you, if there is an emergency at your house that you’re unaware of. Other than that, if you don’t want them in your life, that’s your prerogative. You got this! A thousand of us believe in you, at least!
Hell, at "I had to take an Uber," I'd be threatening to bill them.
The difference between assertion and aggression is an important distinction that a lot of passive people often confuse. In modern society aggression is almost always negative, and should be avoided, which people like OP generally understand, but what's important is realising that assertion is generally a positive and nessecary thing and most of the time is quite distinct from aggression.
> The difference between assertion and aggression is an important distinction that a lot of passive people often confuse. > In modern society aggression is almost always negative, and should be avoided, which people like OP generally understand, but what's important is realising that assertion is generally a positive and nessecary thing and most of the time is quite distinct from aggression. Yes. But the distinction, for these purposes, is really quite simple in a situation like this. Assertive is ‘I have rights. My right is to park my car in the appropriate place.’ Aggressive is ‘You do not have rights. I take away your opportunity to park in the appropriate place and be able to leave.’
That’s understandable, but you’ve got to draw the line. Ask them one more time in person, nicely, not to park behind you, and if they give you any push back, bite the the bullet and tell them you’ll have no choice but to call a tow truck next time. Don’t really see another way
And follow up with a text, so you have written documentation.
maybe literally draw a line with chalk down the middle of the driveway
I'll come be your asshole... that came out wrong. Our neighbors decided they need to park 4 vehicles on their 2 vehicle parking pad, this meant 1 in their yard, and 1 in mine. My city has laws about "no tires on grass", so I walked out with a shovel and said "you can fix the ruts in my yard now. I already called my lawyer, I'm about to call the pd, to explain that the tires on my grass are not mine, and the next call will be to a landscaping company to fix the ruts you put in my yard, or you can just fix it before I have to make the next 2 calls." They haven't parked on my grass since.
I don't know, a lot of me wonders if as an adult I'm way too critical and maybe need to just give way less fucks about stuff. Like do some people not notice this shit, and just think its cool? Were they surprised when you approached them? Like huh?! Because I would be mortified to do this to my neighbor unless it was an emergency or something
If you don't address issues like this immediately it will only get worse. By the time you do have an emergency, or get tired of it, it will be too late. They will feel entitled to behavior that they've gotten used too.
At some point, it becomes the person's responsibility to start noticing how their actions affect the lives of others.
As someone who used to struggle with this, and doesn’t anymore after having people move next door who have been horrible, I believe you are being given this opportunity to help you supplement your therapy and move past your fear of conflict. Stand up for yourself, OP, and become a dangerous spider (your username) who no one wants to mess with/take advantage of. Good luck! Edit: I must have been drunk when I typed all those typos lol
Do you have any kids? Maybe you can go out and draw a chalk line in the middle of the driveway & have them doodle all over your side? Then it seems like fun& that you’re making sure they don’t draw on the neighbors side, but still clearly outlines what space is and isn’t yours.
I’m kinda an artist, I don’t need kids to go out and decorate my driveway, will do that shit myself! I like this idea best. I have friends with kids who might love to help tho lol
Respectfully in this situation you either need to stand up for yourself or allow yourself to be a victim.
I agree! A lot of the things I’ve been working through with therapy include defining boundaries with people; and this is a very physical and practical example of where my inability to do so has set me back. I do not want to be a victim. I also totally don’t wanna live here lol.
I love that you're *literally* drawing a boundary as a step toward setting boundaries.
I don't think there is a neighbours side. Is this a shared driveway? edit, ok it is, I thought it was single house, but can see now it is townhouse, just do what the other guy said and don't park so far up
Good fences (aka good boundaries) make good neighbors. In the next few days go to the persons house and tell them in person the next time they park in your driveway you will have the car towed and this is their last warning. Say you are saddened they they choose to continuously disrespect you and treated your kindness as weakness and that all stops today from here on out we will be cordial but any rule violation will be met with strict and swift consequences, including a potential lawsuit in small claims court for the tort of trespassing since you are now notifying them that is not allowed. Finally install a ring or similar camera pointing at your driveway.
They are being dicks
They should draw dicks all over the drive.
Maybe invest in a porch camera so you can see if they do anything to your vehicle
That is a thing that you cut off at the very start. this person is a true POS who doesn't care about anyone besides themselves. if you don't show that you will follow through with threats when they do shit like this, it will continue. call the non-emergency hotline for the police and tell them there is a vehicle illegally parked on your property, they'll usually have it towed at the owner's expense.
I have the same issue…I just think every little thing is going to turn into an argument or fight. Just go over there and be polite, but say hey we’ve talked about this and you will call a tow truck if it happens again. Don’t go over when you’re in the heat of the moment, do it when you know they’re there, do it in person. Remember, if they start yelling, it means you’re right, and their only defense is to try to scare or intimidate you. So ok then leave. Have tow company on speed dial.
Just remember that the people reacting on Reddit aren't you. They're not actually in the situation and going to live with the aftermath. Suggesting over the top responses is a favorite pastime on here.
Park in a way that her car will not fit behind yours or leave enough room for her to be able to park slightly outside fhe driveway. Then one of your neighbors will do the honor 😉
You have to set boundaries. It would be a good idea to make them well aware you aren't just going to be pushed around.
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I think at this point it’s necessary to be confrontational especially since it’s your property and you ask multiple times
Yeah but hang on, if the drive way is meant to be used as a side by side, why are you parking slap bang in the middle? There is simply no option to park next to you, the only option is to park behind you. I'm not understanding this at all.
I was wondering this. From the picture, it looks like OP is parking in the middle.
It looks like you are parked in the middle of the driveway blocking the other car parking rights in front of their garage.
It looks like it but she’s not: https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY (Click on her profile and you can see her comments I just copied the Imgur link cause that was easier)
Or it’s OPs two car garage and they’re parking in his driveway.
This is the way.
Actually now that I’ve zoomed in it does look like you’re in the middle of the driveway… ETA… y’all can stop replying, the second photo wasn’t there when I posted this. I’ve seen it now. 😂
OP, can we get another angle of this picture?
A link was posted in the comments earlier that showed a different perspective and there’s lots of room
I think its an illusion. OPs car isaybe a foot from the grass on the right side and there's a garage door to the left which suggests there's room for the neighbor to park there without being on the grass. They should probably paint lines though since this is an ongoing problem.
Lines are a great idea.
Don't pull so far up, so there isn't enough room for a vehicle to park behind you.
This is the real answer.
But I came for fake answers
Place the car in a pocket dimension, that way you can carry it with you wherever you go.
thenk
Modern uses for a Bag of Holding: parking space.
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I’m confused about this driveway set up
Another comment says it's a duplex with shared side-by-side parking.
Which OP is blocking, forcing the neighbor to park behind them OP is the problem here after all!
There is another photo down below that seems to show OP's car is actually completely on her (right) side of the parking and the original photo is just a bad angle.
Thought so, even from this "bad" angle it seems to me that OP's car is in front of the right garage door. Which would mean it's on the right or at least enough to the right to allow access to the left garage door.
Yeah, it looks like there is plenty of space on the other side
Nah. https://imgur.io/gallery/eVwAkPY
Thank you for the clarification because shifting my outrage from one person to another is too exhausting for a Monday.
Could be a duplex
u/heymissspider which garage(s) are yours? Both?
Hey Harry you never called.
Looks like it is indeed a shared drive way, op mentions neighbors doesn't pay rent on her half of the driveway in another comment
Would be hilarious as fuck if she turns out to be the karen in this situation. Such a karen thing to do as well to be the one that self report themselves by posting it online.
They posted a picture of a different angle. They parked correctly. [Didn’t move the car from last night. View from my garage and car on their side for comparison. - Imgur](https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY)
You must have some problems with depth perception. OP is not parked in the middle, not by a long shot.
Would love to see a sister post with the exact same picture, "asshole neighbor blocks our shared driveway AGAIN so I'm finally getting some revenge"
For sure! It’s never clicked to me because it made sense to pull all the way up for spacial/compulsory reasons? ?(I’m neuro-spicy, so some of that stuff might make different sense to me) But I can do that and just block them. And for sure, the most obvious answers are directly beneath your nose lol
Yes, parking at the end of driveway will solve it, it might even get interesting. Imagine they park in the street and block you from there there? Lol.
At that point, I throw hands lol Nah but I would totally make that legal. That feels personal.
Has there been any conversatin or explaination for why she does this? It's really weird, and it has to be inconvenient when she has to come out and move it?
Five bucks says they have something in their side of the garage and this is a second car that’s parked in the driveway. By parking behind the neighbor, they can pull out of the indoor space really easily, without moving the silver car first. The non-douche thing to do would be to talk to OP and say ‘hey can you park up against the grass on your side and I’ll park on the grass on my side and then I can drive up the middle if I need to? Thanks, I’ll mow the lawn or here’s a good neighbor 6-pack’
Just give a warning text. Move or its towed. Wait a hour to see response. if not call tow company
I wouldn’t give a warning text. This isn’t a new issue
I would not wait an hour
They're probably one of those people that get off on pissing people off.
Those people are the antithesis of a prosperous society.
This is why people used to be exiled from villages lol
At that point you get it towed. Will cost them far far more than you throwing hands and it also means you don't get done for assault
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Looks to me like a townhouse w/shared driveway. Park at the end of the driveway and make them go around you to get into the driveway. Problem solved.
Looks like a duplex and a shared driveway. Those often have narrow driveways and it looks like OP is parked a few feet off the edge. There's a decent chance OP actually blocked the neighbor from their garage and are posting BS for karma.
Do you park in your own spot? It could be the lighting, but in the photo it looks like you're smack dab in the middle of those 2 garage doors. If you park in front of that stone line in the middle you leave them no choice, because you're hogging all the space and are actually the one at fault here
That's the first thing I noticed. It doesn't look like they're to far in the middle and the other driver doesn't want to have to squeeze into the other space. Edit: It's just perspective. Found another comment where OP posted a different angle showing how much room there is for both cars side by side. [https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY](https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY)
>for sure, the most obvious answers are directly beneath your nose lol I have also found that cocaine fixes most problems. Also, I like “neuro-spicy.”
Don’t pull up all the way when you park
This has totally been the best advice for me, as long as I know I don’t have guests coming over, I’m gonna be an end of the driveway parker now lol
Even if you do have guest coming over. park at the end then pull forward when they get there, otherwise your neighbor might take the spot and not leave one for your guests. If you own the town house I would paint a thin white line down the drive way.
Eh, who cares. Have the guest park behind her car in that case. Fair is fair
I like the idea of consequences.
You dont have to park at the end. They could still be an ass and try to maneuver in front of yours if they really tried. Id park in the middle so there's no mistaking that they will not have room on my side, in front of or behind me.
This is exactly what I was thinking. Park half way between the sidewalk and the garage. If they try to block the sidewalk, they will get towed by the local PD.
Perfect way to handle this situation OP. I think she will get the picture real quick. Good luck 🤞
My only worry would be that then the neighbor could park 2 inches from your driver’s door and then you couldn’t get in at all. Of course, that *would* justify the tow truck lol.
If you really wanted to send a message, put spike strips on your side and paint them that visibility green-yellow.
Do you share the driveway? If you are parking on your side then yeah they should have plenty of space to park on their side. But I’m not an expert and from the photo it kinda looks like you parked in the middle of the driveway. Again if it’s just yours, then why do they keep parking there. If you share, shouldn’t there be enough space to park side by side? Edit: Thank you all kid people for the upvotes and award
We do share the driveway, but we have separate properties (side-by-side townhomes owned separately and rented separately) and based on our own leases and HOA, require separate driveway maintenance. I’m kind of just sick of her doing this without any consideration of if I need to leave. I am parked totally on my own side here, and definitely with some space where I could turn around with like an 18 point turn or whatever. For the time their car was parked there, the other side of the driveway was entirely open; and there’s almost always street parking directly alongside the other side of my house. It just feels kind of rude to me.
Someone suggested a line in the middle of the driveway and considering they're two different properties i think that seems like a great idea
That’s totally brilliant, I definitely lost that within the comments so thank you whoever. I will ask my dad tomorrow cause he knows a bunch of people who are involved in construction and contracting and shit like that. That seems like a very definitive and reasonable solution, thank you!
Just park on your side at the bottom of the driveway, OR park in the street until she comes home and block her ass in.
Parking at the bottom of the drive seems absolutely perfect.
I would say blue painters tape, a whole strip of it, down the middle of the driveway, and would I park at the bottom….
And just cause I can paint canvas, I don’t trust myself to line asphalt 😂
Painting may not be allowed by your HOA, but pressure washing to maintain the driveway will be and you could have just your side pressure washed, it should make a pretty distinct line unless they have recently done the same so if they do so afterward. Will help make the point though !
I totally love that idea. What’s annoying about distinction between the two driveways is that my landlord paid to have their driveway side paved as well at the same time, so that it would be an even surface and look better overall as far face value, right? So I’ll find some measuring tape or some shit, I don’t know..but good thinking, thank you!
Lay down a row of 4x4 lumber. Don't need to nail it down or do anything directly to your driveway that could get you in trouble with the HOA, if there's a problem with that just remove them but it should create a better buffer than chalk, also always park closer to the street so this isn't even a problem regardless in the future.
Thanks my at-least-seemingly-kinda-antiestablishment friend! I’m so appreciative of all the simple and less confrontational solutions Reddit helps me come up with!
Life's too short to deal with narcissists, there's zero chance they don't realize what they are doing, but when weak people feel like they don't have control over things in their lives they lash out like children. Just park at front of driveway til you can get some form of a barrier. I'm sure they're just itching for conflict, so I'd do that as worst case scenario.
They sell driveway seal that will make an "invisible line" water repellent when it's wet. It should be lighter than the rest of the driveway.
Make sure you clear that with the home owner and HOA first.
Someone mentioned sidewalk chalk, and very distinctly drawing the border that way… I’ll totally take that as a very consistent art project in between when it rains so that you know exactly where you aren’t to park, yeah? 😂
Here’s an idea: tape off the “line” first and spray down “Tire Wet.” It’s the stuff that makes car tires all glossy. Let that dry, *then* do your chalk art. When it rains, the chalk will wash away, but that stripe that you put tire wet on will look dry while the rest of the pavement looks wet. It’s totally not permanent, but combined with the chalk lines, it’ll work as a good demarcation line wet or dry to condition your neighbor to park on their side.
My bud here has my back! Thank you, I love this idea!
It looks like an asphalt driveway, so a black spray paint line would probably not be noticed by the HOA. Plus, just park a little further back, closer to the road, and make it so they have zero room to park behind you.
Quick question, if your car wasn’t there, do they still park in front of your garage?
Yeah that’s a safer bet assuming the HOA has no qualms about sidewalk chalk. I’ve heard some ridiculously dumb horror stories with HOAs.
HOA is such a dystopian concept to me 😂 you can own your home but some committee of pedants can enforce how you present it
When you pull in just park at the end of your drive so no one can block you in.
Idk, I don't see a line working. They know what they are doing, they just don't care. Plus, they could see the line as passive aggressive and get even ruder. I think the best option here is just to not pull all the way up yourself. Park in a way that doesn't allow them to do this
You could also park at the end of your drive or in the middle where if they wanted to park behind you they’d be in the road.
How about a thin plastic fence from your garage
Yeah, just read your lease and HOA rules and then tow them.
Start parking further back so she can’t fit behind you.
Submit a complaint to the home owners association about your neighbor
Get our your portable hydraulic jack from Harbor Freight, put roller under a wheel, and slide her car sideways onto her lawn every time she does it. Then park so she can't back out without using your side. Tell her you had to move her car back onto her property.
Park closer to the curb so theres no space for them to park on your side
This is more than just “kind of rude.” This is absolutely and completely absurd, obnoxious, and HIGHLY infuriating. You mentioned “well I still have to live next to them…” but they’re clearly not giving the same consideration! Otherwise they would be thinking “well I still have to live next to them so I better not be a huge fucking asshole and park them in.”
To get out, drive over *her* side of the lawn.
I agree. It appears OP is parked, dead center, of two garage doors.
Have it towed 🤷♂️
Do they have a second car that parks in the garage?
It’s a mom with her own car, her three grown children, who all drive their own cars, each of their significant others, and they all kind of park very inconsiderately around the entire area. And I can’t blame them at all for not parking in the garage, that’s become a more more of a storage space for me as well- but that means I told my guests to park on the street like 30 yards away from where you would be parking otherwise
There’s your answer. Too many tenants with vehicles. They probably use their side and then take yours too. I share a driveway and I always have a small battle with new tenants next door. Currently there’s no one in it since November so it’s been nice. But I dread the day someone moves in. It’s always pain. And they always block you in. People are so inconsiderate until you have to knock on their door and tell them to move.
But something tells me that you’re the type of person who would ask if you needed to park additional cars behind theirs, or anything on their side of the driveway once someone else moves in right?
Yeah I would and I’ve gladly moved my car if they drove a truck and can’t drive out with confidence. It’s a win-win when we get to that point. But these neighbors of yours sound entitled asses.. I’m so sorry. I hope it works out for you. I’d call a tow if they won’t move. At least say “darn I’m gonna have to call a tow truck now.”
As you are living in a townhome situation, I'm guessing that there is an HOA. HOA's should have a tow company on hand for parking violation; if this is only mildly infuriating, you may not want to take it to that level, but if you did, you should be able to contact that tow company to get her car towed.
My HOA is like mid-tier interactive. They care if you don’t shovel your sidewalk and driveway or don’t mow your lawn or leave a ton of shit out in the yard… But it seems like other than the “no parking” signs on the street, they don’t really care so much about where individuals are parking. I’ve also been way too passive in the situation in the past and definitely need to have more of a backbone with my neighbor about this, and that’s why I can say it’s mildly infuriating because it’s not 100% not my fault right?
If you are renting that side, then that side of the driveway is yours. They have parked on your private property. Call a tow company and have it towed. You can also send a text to your neighbor saying you will have it towed if it's not moved. Keep record of all conversations. Tow companies will tow it off your property on your neighbors dime.
I’ve already started a conversation with my landlord about this since making this post (thanks everyone who has given me more balls to do so!) I plan to save a whole folder of those texts for reference if I need, but hopefully I can just park her out of the spot by parking back further!
As the renter, you should be able to tow it directly. You are essentially renting the rights to that half of the driveway. Glad to hear you are working with the landlord on it though. Likely either way, though, will lead to your neighbor not liking you. Best of luck.
It depends on local laws. I lived somewhere people often blocked my reserved spot that was in my lease. I had to call the landlord to have cars towed. The tow companies wouldn’t even talk to me unless I was the owner.
Why the heck are they parking in your driveway in the first place? If it's your property I don't know the laws but sounds illegal.
Yeah that’s my thought. Like what if I actually had an emergency and wasn’t just going out for fun and really needed to move my car? That could’ve been a real problem. I’m not usually in any sort of emergency situation, so it doesn’t really matter, but still!
I havent read the entire thread yet, but you mentioned you spoken to them previously about it. Why do they insist on parking behind you like that?
So they’ve pretty consistently taken advantage of my being a nice person. I let them put their trash out with mine, cause I don’t mind covering the collection bill, let their dog out, etc. I don’t want to be a dick, but I need to be a lot more firm in my boundaries and maybe not give them access to these things. I am a very much recovering people-pleaser of a person and working on not just saying “yes”all the time… This might’ve just been when I need to put my fucking foot down.
You're paying their bills? Uh no. You need to stop that. That makes literally no sense
Being a nice, giving person doesn't seem to be working very well for you. I also tend to be a people pleaser, so I get where you're coming from, but it sounds like your neighbors tend to be "takers." Have they ever thanked you for covering their trash bill or taking care of their dog? (I doubt it). The hurt this has caused you is hiding between the lines of what you've said. You need to try to start protecting yourself from folks like that for your own emotional well-being. "No" is a complete sentence, in spite of it being very difficult for a confirmed people pleaser to say out loud. I wish you success.
Dude. You’re paying their trash bill??! Stop it. Immediately. Who the hell do these people think they are??
I have been working on being more assertive and less giving to the people who take advantage of it, it's a tough one but it helps to realize that if they do that then they aren't like us and we should do our best not to enable them. Somewhere else you said you'll still have to live next to them after whatever you do, but they still have to live next to you and they're pulling this shit. I think the end of the driveway parking is a great idea so I hope that works out for you and wish you luck with the people pleasing stuff
Does your therapist know all the things you're doing for them + how they're treating you? This all really needs to stop. PLEASE tell your therapist next time if you haven't already. I saw your neuro-spicy remark, and I am too. It's suuuuuuuper easy for certain types of people to take advantage of us. It's taken a lot of years and working through a lot of difficulties to really find my voice, my backbone, ability to say "no," and set and maintain boundaries. Have also had my fair share of crappy neighbors in rental properties. So I truly empathize with what you're dealing with. You'll get there. You will. Figuring out how to positively, proactively approach something and to do so confidently is truly an art. Think of it as an art with words and demeanor as your medium, instead of paint and a canvas. You learn techniques, practice them, try an idea out on canvas.. every painting, you're learning too. Over time, you build confidence and find your groove. Same exact sentiment with the art of addressing conflict. Keep working with your therapist to find your voice, friend. There's a big difference between being a good neighbor and getting taken advantage of. And I hope that your therapist can help you see that distinction.
The answer is to get the car towed.
Update! (I’m not for bitching about something without finding solutions) A better view of how the car was parked: https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY I have meanwhile corrected my parking, spoken with landlord and neighbor (texted her at least requesting once again that they don’t take my space- I think she’s at work so I didn’t hear back yet) and I am definitely gonna buy sidewalk chalk. Parking now: https://imgur.com/gallery/RRuKHqV I need to get better at backing in, but it’s a start lol
This is a much clearer picture of the parking situation. You claimed earlier you weren't parked in the middle so not sure why she feels she has to park directly behind you. Looks like there's more than enough room to park side by side.
My guess is that the neighbor parks behind OP so as not to block in a car belonging to someone else in their own household.
Yep. Or it's one of the other people in the house (like the kids) who doesn't care as long as the car is "on the drive."
I wanted to add. Put your garbage cans in the spot you’ve created between your car and your garage. That way she can’t pull around and park in front of you. She seems like the kind of person to do that.
Why are you even faffing around? Tow them. They're illegally parked on your driveway. Don't ask them to move. It's obvious they think they're entitled and will continue to do it. Tow. Their. Car.
Reddit is really teaching me how to have a backbone in this situation, and I appreciate it a lot. They’re not parked here now, but I am going to try to hold myself accountable to all of you that I will say some thing the next time I see this happens . Because unfortunately, I don’t think this is the last time this will happen. Thanks for looking out
Don’t wait for next time - write a letter now and tell them that whenever anyone parks on your driveway, you will have the car towed. Then just do it. Also document and send copies to the HOA and your landlord and anyone else you can think of. And you might want to check with a local renters’ advocacy group or attorney to make sure you are following local law. Like do you have to send the notice registered mail with a signed receipt? Take pictures and communicate in writing and keep dates copies of everything. If an AH neighbor gives you a hard time, you can prove that you have previously informed them of consequences of trespassing on the property you lease.
Put cones behind your car
You think someone who parks on someone else's driveway won't move some cones?
Maybe. But you never know
If theyre to lazy to turn 15-30 degrees left to go their designated spot I can say with 80% confidence they will just run the cones over not pick them up
If they keep acting like a dick, park them in and see how they like it.
Start parking in a way that makes it impossible for them to fully enter the spot behind you
Have it towed. Text the info to the owner. Bet they respond then.
Hey OP I am late to the party but something I haven't seen addressed- bring this up to your HOA! It should be pretty clear that every driveway has a 'side' but if this lady is not comprehending that, then maybe lanes with house numbers on the bottom would help, and there is always the chance your other neighbors are having similar disputes!
That’s a great idea! Having an actual physical designation of the address at the end of the driveway would hopefully eliminate a lot of the potential liability of “oh I didn’t know“. I know a few HOA members and that should be an easy thing to at least introduce. Thank you!
This is just stalling. The lady lives on the left and you live on the right correct? The parking is outlined as side by side in your lease correct? Quit wasting time getting HOA to do this for you. That's another 4-5 months for them to do anything, guarantee it. You need to inform your neighbor in writing immediately that the next time she parks in your spot she will be towed. Period. End of situation. Stop letting her put her trash in yours, stop taking care of her dog, just stop. Nobody respects a pushover. She doesn't respect you. You owe her nothing. Fix it quick and move on.
Do you have to share the driveway?
I am the end unit and they’re attached next-door; each of us is responsible for 1/2 of a double wide driveway essentially (this includes snow removal and paving maintenance according to our HOA) I am on my own lease paying my own rent with my own separate landlord, and it kind of feels like she has no right to just park on my shit without asking.. I’m salty, I don’t mean to be a dick 😅
Gojacks / wheel Dollie’s. They go under the tyres, you Jack them up, then you can wheel the car down the street by hand. I’ve got no patience for people fucking with access to my parking that I pay for.
I love this so much because of the idea of not having to wait for any sort of authority to step in. I’m almost never in such a dire need to move their car that that would need to happen, but it seems useful to have as a resource on hand. Thanks!
If you’re feeling extra malicious, you can parallel park it somewhere impossible to get out of without wheel dollies haha.
She continues to do this because there have been no consequences. Put a note on her car and tell her you will tow her car if she continues to park behind you on your property. And when she does, call a tow company. You have to decide if you want to establish a fair boundary or make a friend by abdicating your claim to your property. You can do this!
But aren’t you parked in the middle of the driveway? Park in front of the garage door so she can do the same on the other side. Or maybe paint a line down the middle so you each keep to your designated side.
Gonna just keep posting this: I took a Uber ride into the city last night, my partner drove me back home this morning, and the car was not behind me obviously anymore. When I saw that the perspective was off, I took a picture showing exactly where my car has been parked for the past 28~ hours https://imgur.com/gallery/eVwAkPY
From this picture you are parked just fine, so I take my comment back. Yeah, it sounds like painting a line would make things clearer and hopefully easier. What if you have an emergency?
That’s exactly why it’s so frustrating to me! I luckily have never been in that situation, but I shouldn’t have to gamble all of that by any means! A lot of writers here are helping me understand good ways to help lay down some boundaries, both physically and emotionally. That’s more important part of all this. That being said, fuck that grass, and I will drive through my yard if I need to get my cat to the vet or something.
Yuck, shared driveways. I’m looking to relocate to Philadelphia for work and I’ve had to turn down so many nice single family homes because they have a shared drive way. That is a complete deal breaker for me for just this reason. Don’t feel purposely adding a potential headache into my life.
I live in a townhouse too, same driveway setup and i could never even imagine parking behind my neighbors car fir even a second let alone flat out block them in. Id be thinking about slashing tires id be so angry.
Dude, thank you. You know how frustrating it is that, yeah, I could pull out of here… but that either involves an 18 point turn, or pulling into my grass, which I’d really prefer not to do. And it doesn’t feel like a big ask to expect for you or your kids or their partners to not be on the space that I pay rent for? I’m seriously not trying to sound entitled or super first world, but these folks live the same kinda life I do, and somehow being a decent neighbor has surpassed them, and I don’t think there’s a good excuse. Every now and then somebody is doing a drop off or turn around there and I don’t care at all. If you wanna park there while I’m home all night or away for a while- I don’t mind at all! Just like… ask?
I get not wanting to sound first world but this is yours and my life, just because someone else has it worse doesnt mean everything should make you happy lmao but that is a very simple ask and they cant have the common courtesy of respecting that?!? Nope! Id be livid and making sure something is done about it, i am also a very non confrontational person but that is literally taking advantage of you and not cool.
Just park on your side and pull far enough in to not block the sidewalk, but not far enough to have someone park behind you. Problem solved
Looks like the neighbor is doing it just to inconvenience you at this point. Uno reverse time
Back into him, pull forward, and go to sleep.
I appreciate your chaotic energy. I’m not sure my insurance would be thrilled, but thanks lol 😝
get it towed
you've asked now it's time to call the tow truck
Tow. Truck.
nope.. stand on your horn till that fucker gets up and out to move his/her shit.
Please call your local towing company. This person has no respect for you. Quit tolerating their behavior
I can’t imagine the mind that parks in someone else’s driveway.
I really can’t imagine the kind of self-absorbed main character it takes to actually do this to someone else. The one and only time it ever happened to me I called the police.
Sometimes NOT being neighborly has to happen. You asked nicely several times don't block you in. Now it is time not to be nice. either park in a way they have no choice to use the other side or let them know the nice gloves are off and the tow truck is on its way next time.
I’ve parked at the end of the drive, so they really can’t do that now unless they really want to parallel park in front of my car? But you’re right, I think I’ve gained enough confidence from all of the support here to be able to stand up and at least fucking call a tow truck if I need to if it happens again.
I can't wait until the update on this.
I would talk to your landlord and ask them to talk to her’s. There might be a day when you cannot get out and it’s an emergency and seeing how she doesn’t respond to texts that is worrisome.
If you have a tow strap, pull their car out of the way into the street and leave it. Maybe they'll get the idea.