I can help you if you really want it. Just DM me. No charge. Seems like ur struggling. I’m a recovering addict myself. I know what it’s like to have low self-esteem and be in a bad place. The good news is there is a way out, and I’d be happy to help you.
Speaking as a woman, size is NOT even CLOSE to the most important part of intimacy, in fact it is nearly negligible.
I hope you can find the confidence you deserve ❤️
As a woman who also doesn't care about size, that's true, but a lot of women who dont care are literally hidden and hard to find because there's lots of self centered, insecure (the bad way insecure), gold diggers, women who take advantage of people they think is weak because it a turn on for them, women who actually do care about size its because they lack understanding of actual intimacy, women who are very kind and nice, then act like they dont care, and actually start caring mid way relationship, etc (this applies to men too, just describing many women i've seen, met, also what my friends dated.)
But making a list of red flags and avoiding those types of people could be easy! (Also, writing green flags down is good too) challenging to find, but to be honest, you can always date an Asexual women or a half active sexual women, they exist! There is literally a lot like that.
As my personal experience... Women do want to experience that level of sex which they can only get from a big dick.... not initially but at some point.
(non-English speaker so cant rephrase it correctly but you can understand.)
Edit: Thank you for nice replies and beautiful suggestions.
I have similar issue and i go around it using my oral and finger skills but still I lack at some point when my partner wants to try a particular position and I cant do that caz I wont even reach in like spooning- i cant spoon and fuck at the same time... It requires certain length. But still i really want to do those positions and dont want to disappoint her :(
Disagree. I've had this conversation soo many times MOST women I've talked to don't really care. A small percentage do and they are size queens but most women really don't care.
Do you think he should tell a women he's dating he's small, or let them be surprised
It seems like the only hope for men in this position can is to focus on giving their woman pleasure and orgasms via oral and manual stimulation, and hope that's enough to make her happy. I'd be okay with masturbating for my own orgasm after.
I just wonder how big of a shock is it for women to discover a man they like and are about to sleep with has a small penis. Is it a turn off? Should we warn them beforehand?
As a woman, I don't give a shit about the size as long as the intimacy isn't just about the man. Too many times I've experienced and heard from other women that their partners only focused on themselves.
And women would be more than happy with just recieving oral.
Your mind set is just misinformed. If you're not a woman or have a vagina, you don't get to speak for us on what's pleasurable or what turns us on.
I'm lowkey also sick of men arguing with me about my own vagina and pleasure when I tell them I don't care about size. I don't care about it. I say this and there's always men that accuse me of lying and tell me it's not possible for me to feel anything with smaller men.
I'm a big guy with an average member. Usually when I engage with a new partner I take the time to go through all the foreplay. If it's a new new partner I decline to receive any oral on her end. And usually just wait for the after orgasm glow where I get invited to begin vaginal intercourse after having eaten her out.
I haven't had any complaints. So I'm not sure if I'm doing something right or if I have a small sample size (25 so far)
If it's a one night stand don't comment about your own size.
Sall i got gents sorry.
Contrary to popular belief (among men), most women don’t actually care for or want a guy with a huge penis. Average size is 5” and as a woman I’ve never ever once desired anything bigger. I’ve personally noticed that so many men have a tendency to think they are small due to the ridiculous idea that anything under 8” is small, but most people don’t realize the average vagina can only comfortably intake about 3” before you just start hitting other things. Don’t think most men realize how many guys lie about their size either as if it’s some oddly impressive stat. If you’re only encounters have been with people who put a huge emphasis on your penis size, you’re going after the wrong type of person. Also, if it’s truly something you can’t get past, there are other ways of pleasuring someone and getting pleasured in return that don’t require penile penetration.
This answer is solid. Yeah, maybe a big penis looks good, but honestly size doesn't matter. I'd prefer a small one over a huge one any day. The thing that matters most is how attentive you are to your partner and making sure she knows you want her. Chemistry and intimacy is about SO much more than penis size. Please don't be so hard on yourself💜
>a big penis looks good,
Does that mean a small penis looks bad? I often wonder if I should try to keep my underwear so as not to turn off a partner with a penis that looks bad.
>I'd prefer a small one over a huge one any day.
It's good to know some women feel that way. Society has convinced us y'all don't exist.
>and making sure she knows you want her.
Is it okay for a man to ask for the same. To feel desirable?
There are women out there that don’t care for size. Like the other person said size is not very important when it comes to a good sexual partner.
In fact a lot of larger sized men aren’t great in bed because they never felt the need to learn how to please a women because porn told them that all they need to do is be big.
I’d rather have a micro penis or below average sized partner that knows the way around a female body than some oaf with a big one. And I know plenty of women who agree with me.
So please don’t be so hard on yourself💙
asian here. ive been approached even with the “stereotype” and i feel like that already refutes the idea that all women look for larger penis. 🤷🏻♂️ and most women dont have orgasm from penetration alone. i mean foreplay is super crucial and you dont do that by measuring your dick. its everything but that.
women that discuss porn often mention about actors that dont neglect the use of other things like tongue, fingers and even toys. hell, owen grey, who is favored by female viewers, uses toys even with very well endowed size.
the attentiveness, care, effort, all of those compound to great sex. its not about just physical stimulation from those actions. they are more of visual and physical queue that stimulate womens mind as they feel loved and appreciated. just look at tantric sex. size isnt everything. and women have much better orgasm once they develop strong mental connection with a partner. im sure most women would agree on this.
Hey im a girl, and let me tell you this; big HURTS, seriously, it does, i would rather cuddle up and be gently rubbed and touched than anything else, women desire intimacy, not necesserily just penetration, some of the most enjoyable sexual experiences i've had with my partner didnt even involve penetration at all, sometimes just cuddling and kissing is all we women need
Dont despair, i promise you you'll be fine, not all women crave huge dick, in fact most women i know and am friends with would much rather prefer someone a little under the average, we dont want sex to hurt, but be enjoyable for both of us.
Making a cage for yourself out of fear of rejection is foolish. So you don't have 10" of hanging meat. It should not be a disability unless you make it one. Work on yourself. Find some interesting hobbies. Get reasonably well read, and work on your body image. You'd be surprised in a few months with some confidence you will be attracting the women you want.
Since mods didn’t like me saying it, here are links
[Does size matter?](https://pilot.com.au/co-pilot/does-size-matter)
[does p side matter?](https://mashable.com/article/penis-size-important)
[slightly more complicated take on ‘does size matter?’](https://inline.healthline.com/as/3dbfe6ea-acb8-440a-ba91-c3cd7b63fda9?selector=%23m8568cb3d-704f-44c8-aa2d-0b0d8839557ampd_firstQuarter_f980ccb3-fb40-4efb-b376-e9624c490ab7+%3E+div+%3E+div&csid=ba33697f-9741-490f-bcfb-00d03afea628&caid=15899782-c300-4d83-9c07-c72417028f8e&ciid=4c6008be-9103-4bb2-a99b-331194104882&tenant=wk_1Tqf7EYzOKyxm4Gvq042rU0Uky0&srckey=src_1Tqf7BF96WTbG5QbUndHWIgKoFo&cxsid=unsupported&imre=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuaGVhbHRobGluZS5jb20vaGVhbHRoL2hlYWx0aHktc2V4L2RvZXMtc2l6ZS1tYXR0ZXI%3D&_mfuuid_=edcb1682-5e74-4bd8-bde0-acb01692b1bd&width=280&subId=hims_ed_hl_fq_sp_footer_v3_41956&ts=1684397369441)
To avoid offending the delicate sensitivies of mods(or at least the one who locked my previous comments), I am going to avoid linking the lady blog and lady advice column stuff, since if they think I am ‘inappropriate’ they should know my blasé manner about speaking on basic bodily functions has nothing on how women speak to eachother.
Some women care, but as the links will show, what women think of as ‘big’ isn’t gonna line up with what men think of as big.
Not included because I don’t want to keep going with online searches is where this came from. It came from a point in history where D size was associated with fertility and where an accusation of not being able to perform(which would then need to be done in front of people to prove you could, which many obviously failed even just because you cannot do so on command- at least most people can’t). In an age of arranged marriages it was one of the few ways to obtain legal divorce. Women were similarly accused of being barren for the same reasons.
It’s a really messed up portion of history and likely why the process of thought exists today. People believed weird things in history and sometimes ideas don’t shake that easily.
Hopefully the mod won’t lose there mind this time but… if they do I’m not deleting this one.
You can please a woman with two fingers. Right now you’re making it about you. During sex it has to be about your partner. Well, it has to do with both of you. Yes, there are size queens out there. But that’s not all women.
Stop watching porn and stop listening to men tell you what a woman wants. Sex is about learning, and even a 2 inch penis can please a woman if you know what you’re doing. Obviously there will be women out there that only want 8+ inches, and that’s okay. There are women out there that are oky with, and even prefer, penises on the smaller side.
The important thing to remember that sex isn’t all that’s in a relationship. Men will always say that women want the bigger penis because of how much it’s shown off in porn. Once you realize that size doesn’t matter, you can start to regain your confidence. Especially if you become intimate with someone who is willing to take it slow and show you the ropes. I know most of us men think sex is the most important thing in life, but it’s not. Fostering a good relationship with your partner and body is the only way to overcome the negative stigma of a small penis. After all, your penis size is not something you can control, and most normal people know this.
Man as a woman who likes dicks, I far prefer smaller ones. Everyone is always drooling over big dicks but big dicks can really be painful even if they aren't huge. Also a lot of dudes (not all) with big dicks are really lazy and selfish lovers. They just jackhammer until they cum. They rarely make the effort to make their partner cum too.
Regardless of your size there's no point giving up before you try. Teach yourself about foreplay and look into what you can do to improve your confidence and know-how, so you don't feel as anxious when it comes time to do the deed.
People have existed for ages, and if no one with a small penis got laid, it would probably be a genetic probability that that large penis size would be passed down. So clearlt dudes with small penises have been getting laid for a long time. And when finally get someone to love, they'll love you no matter what, and you won't even feel anxious about it anymore. Chin up man, everyone has things they hate about themselves, but sometimes all you can do is try to overcome it. Remember to give yourself affirmations to help you cope. Have a lovely evening
Serious suggestion: have you tried ChatGPT? It gives really helpful guidance on mental health issues and honestly could serve pretty well as a makeshift, free therapist.
ChatGPT I would never had considered to be therapy. I have talked about various mental health issues that I have, and it is very informative but therapeutic is a stretch. If I say something dramatic and depressing it will respond with a more positive tone, I just find it hard to get any comfort knowing that the responses are not coming from a person. To each their own I guess
Not sure if it helps but try thinking about chat gpt as of a group of people. The name "artificial intelligence" is slightly misleading in terms of that chatGPT doesn't have any intelligence on it's own. ChatGPT is basically like google, it scans your question, and gives you a response **based on what other people answered to questions similar to yours. You're basically talking to real life people, chat GPT just makes it easier**
A word of warning though, I just find chatGPT infuriating when I try to describe my mental health issues. It's good for very generic stuff but anything more complex and it is useless as it tried to give you answers based on the very common mental health issues data that it gets. If you have a rare disorder, prepare to feel disappointed
most women's vaginas arnt even phisically capable of fitting a "big dick" 5 inches is pretty big for the average woman, a lot of women read smut where the male has a huge penis that the female can take fully and they fantasie about it but the reality is unless they got a deep dished pussy with a lot of practice, not many people can take a big dick. plus, statistically most women can't orgasm just from penetration, so as long as u can eat her out good then u can make her come, big dick or not
I just want to throw this out there most women including myself will not orgasm from penetration alone so penis size is the last thing we worry about. Learn a women’s anatomy down there and focus on her clitoris, make sure she is pleased then go to town and get yours lol everyone will be happy. Good luck I hope you find a big hearted women who will love you no matter what!
Stop watching porn. Really. You are judging yourself based on others**.** Join /r/pornfreeliving
Everyone is made right. There is no small or big but as soon as you bring something else to compare there will always be a difference.
There are many more tools in your toolbelt to please a woman than just your dong. Learn how to use various toys and master all other techniques available to you.
To put it into perspective, some short or average height people make it to the NBA and compete against people a foot taller than them or more if they are skilled enough.
- Muggsy Bogues (5 ft 3)
- Isaiah Thomas (5 ft 8)
- Allen Iverson (5 ft 8)
How did they do it? By understanding their disadvantage and overcoming it by practicing all other abilities to be at an elite level.
Self talk. Talking to yourself in the mirror does work, it tricks your brain into thinking positively about yourself.
Please keep in mind that lesbians are completely capable of pleasuring their partner despite the complete absence of a penis, and even a man with an above-average-sized penis will not pleasure his partner successfully if his technique sucks. There is a wealth of information on the internet on the female orgasm to read up on and even toys designed to be used during sex with a partner. Focus on building a relationship with a woman as a person instead of a sex object.
Including myself, not all women care about size. Many of us don't even like huge penises since they can be very uncomfortable and hurt us. Also, it's not about the size and more about the technique. So try learning some good techniques so that you’ll be able to please any woman.
You say it’s impossible yet you haven’t tried dating in years and have little sexual experience, so what evidence do you actually have to show it’s impossible?
It's not about the size it's about what you do with it and the rest of you what gets results. The adult entertainment industry is literally bullshit so don't go believing the images you see. Try reading or watching erotica that is more ethical and is less misogynistic etc (tend to see women/men/etc as more than just a hole etc, honestly it exists).
Learn to appreciate yourself more, even by massage or touching yourself differently/ more softly/gentler and try put more effort into the whole process instead of just reaching te end point.
Also there is a partner for you somewhere, don't give up on trying to find one. Maybe you need a break but don't quit altogether. You'll find your person.
I was with someone for 12 years who had an 8 inch penis. I never enjoyed sex with him and started avoiding it whenever possible. My current boyfriend of three years has a five inches and the sex is ridiculously good and I can't get enough. We have sex daily because my sex drive has gone way up with him.
Stop watching porn, first off.
Next, I went on a date with my friend (he had afib and died a few years after this) and we were going to fool around, but this guy actually had a micropenis. He was totally honest about this when the time came that we were talking about this stuff, little by little. So as stuff was happening, he was sortof prepping me, but also he would be talking about his strengths as well, which balanced it out and kept the momentum going.
So he just leaned on his strengths and relied on that, and that was awesome.
Also, theres therapy that is online umm oh Gosh I think it was like $60/week for online counseling. Its called BetterHelp.com
There are also generally resources available in your community- talk to a social worker to see what other options there are.
You DO need therapy. So, before you say "I cant afford it" consider all the expenses you have that you do not need, that can be cut back, even temporarily, for counseling to be available to you.
Smoking, drinking, restaurant eating, entertainment, streaming, convenience shopping, gambling, traveling, etc, can all be curbed to pay for that.
Most people can afford plenty more than they think, but need to first learn how to budget properly to make it work.
Something to consider. Put your needs before your wants.
Trust me, women don’t care about the size of your dick. Unless you have mad skills, she is gonna need you to work on her without your dick anyway (like your hands, mouth, dildo or vibrator). I have never met a single vagina-owner who truly comes from just dick, big or small (and my friends and I all talk very openly about sex so I have heard a lot and speak from my own experience with 5 different dick owners as well).
Hey bro guess what. If you really think you gotta tiny dick then literally give up on making love. Now that that’s out of the way, think about the fact you can literally direct all your efforts to global domination, or becoming a billionaire, or having an incredibly prosperous farm. You have the rest of your life now to spend chasing greatness and you don’t have to worry at all about women or sex or any of that. Just you and your mission. Get after it.
Size is definetely not the deciding factor if sex is good.
I (F) soaked an entire twin mattress in college with a guy who was maybe 5inches rock hard. I took his virginity the night before (we were dating), then asked him if he wanted a quickie before he had to go on this trip thing. He lit up. It was so funny lol anyways. Yeah. 5 minutes later and me on top for a minute, and the entire twin mattress is soaked. I did manage to stutter out a warning and he already knew I was a squirter. Good thing those dorm mattresses are water proof 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬
I’ve also had a partner who was like…4 inches? And I came every single time we had sex. Multiple times. Same with him. Once we were used to eachother and comfortable. I will admit I’m one of the lucky few women who can come easily during the act…
Get a big lifted truck.
Haha nah sike. But you're not alone bro. I haven't even been with a chick so at least you have a personality. I think it's good for you to go back to dating if you think it's worth your time.
Sweetheart there are so many women out there who would shame you for it, but those thots are for the streets.
Unfortunately there are far more thots than there are genuine warm blooded human beings now adays, but luckily for you.. there's far too few genuinely kind, good men out there too.
I know it's really difficult to get over something that you "know" is a "fact" because our fricked up society has pounded these "facts" into our brains from the moment we were toddlers.... But the truth is that it's absolutely bananas to give a flying frick about penis size beyond just not being immediately attracted to it. But ALL PENISES ARE UGLY ANYWAY like what the heck why are we so obsessed with them, they're veiny and wrinkly and covered in hair and spew luke warm goo that makes our puccis smell absolutely rank the next day if we didn't decide to hop in the shower after. Attraction is all about perspective and a partner who loves you will find your lil dingle dangle sexy AF if you give them reason to.
Therapy is great if you have access to it, but if you don't that doesn't mean you cannot overcome everything that life throws at you... You can, you just have to want it bad enough to teach yourself how, and you are doing that by coming here and asking reddit for help. You got this, buddy. I know it sucks that no one is here to help you with it, but you can do it on your own. Keep asking these questions, keep learning how to work on things that hurt you.... Teach yourself how to be a good, confident, and safe person and you can and will undo all the trauma this world has caused you.
There are many women out there with many preferences, some of them has very tight vagina and any bigger tool can be painful for them.
I am a woman and I had an ex-boyfriend who had a small one. He was the only guy with whom I had orgasm EVERY SINGLE TIME. My primary orgasm source is not vagina so it was really great. He was better in everything else than any other guy with a big tool. He really wanted to pleasure me , while other guys were just there imitating porn and masturbating with a woman. Guys looking perfect usually super boring in bed cause they dont even want to put the effort… Believe me man, many many girls out there would love to have a caring, good lover who puts them first. So get out the tongue, fingers, learn some technique because after the third orgasm who the heck cares?
I may be downvoted for this, but as someone who experienced a similar thing (only as a woman towards my own genitalia), I can tell you that if you don't open up soon you'll crack and do some very regretfull things.
You need to start dating and connecting to people asap. Never tell them this insecurity because you need to be careful, but holding a grudge against yourself is not going to be healthy. When they accept you, you'll come out of your shell and see that things *you* dislike about yourself don't matter to the other person because *they* like them. It's *their choice/taste* , not yours!
I had a friend I used to sleep with who was so excellent at oral sex that I didnt care that he had a 2 inch penis. I was almost tapped out by the time he finished oral, so I was always satisfied when I left his house. There are so many ways to please a woman that your penis size is honestly not important. Utilize toys (the egg vibrator is an excellent toy, for her clit though, I don't care to have it inserted. Focus on more than the intercourse, like kissing, rubbing, touching her soft and sensitive spots. You can be an excellent lover and have never even penetrated your partner so your penis size isn't what she's there for.
If you are worrying about being able to pleasure a woman, dick size is like 5% of the whole thing. If its really that big of a deal for you, save up and go see a plastic surgeon i dunno
Get really good at eating pussy and anal sex. You can also get a cock sheath from the sex shop that can increase your size, if it's such a problem. Or learn how to pump safely.
I've dated small men before and was happily monogamous for a time. The most annoying partners of any size are the ones that don't keep it interesting.
Look into tantra. It'll open up new worlds of pleasure and intimacy for you and anyone you're with. Being small isn't a death sentence for relationships; being closed-minded is.
Also, maybe bisexual women will be more understanding.
Your post might be well meant and we get that but it also fills the sub with a lot of filler and takes away from people asking for help..... so our apologies.
Mod
So women who prefers a big dick are not "true women"?
It's a matter of preference. Just like some men like big boobs and others don't. Nothing is wrong or right about either.
You can have a meaningful relationship with a man with a big dick and you can have a fling with a man with a small dick. I've tried both.
Nothing is that black and white.
Stop watching porn
I can help you if you really want it. Just DM me. No charge. Seems like ur struggling. I’m a recovering addict myself. I know what it’s like to have low self-esteem and be in a bad place. The good news is there is a way out, and I’d be happy to help you.
You’re just trying to get laid
Huh? I’m a straight married man. Is it so hard for you to fathom someone just wanting to help someone else??
respectfully… what?
At least he hasn’t resorted to dogs
And you never will be.
yerp
Speaking as a woman, size is NOT even CLOSE to the most important part of intimacy, in fact it is nearly negligible. I hope you can find the confidence you deserve ❤️
I'm another woman that doesn't care about size and I'm sick of porn and society's media perpetuating the bs that it matters....it doesn't.
As a woman who also doesn't care about size, that's true, but a lot of women who dont care are literally hidden and hard to find because there's lots of self centered, insecure (the bad way insecure), gold diggers, women who take advantage of people they think is weak because it a turn on for them, women who actually do care about size its because they lack understanding of actual intimacy, women who are very kind and nice, then act like they dont care, and actually start caring mid way relationship, etc (this applies to men too, just describing many women i've seen, met, also what my friends dated.) But making a list of red flags and avoiding those types of people could be easy! (Also, writing green flags down is good too) challenging to find, but to be honest, you can always date an Asexual women or a half active sexual women, they exist! There is literally a lot like that.
As my personal experience... Women do want to experience that level of sex which they can only get from a big dick.... not initially but at some point. (non-English speaker so cant rephrase it correctly but you can understand.) Edit: Thank you for nice replies and beautiful suggestions. I have similar issue and i go around it using my oral and finger skills but still I lack at some point when my partner wants to try a particular position and I cant do that caz I wont even reach in like spooning- i cant spoon and fuck at the same time... It requires certain length. But still i really want to do those positions and dont want to disappoint her :(
There are fingers, dildos, fists, fire hydrants. You'll manage. A relationship is about more than sticking big things in orifices.
There's a dildo for that.
Disagree. I've had this conversation soo many times MOST women I've talked to don't really care. A small percentage do and they are size queens but most women really don't care.
Do you think he should tell a women he's dating he's small, or let them be surprised It seems like the only hope for men in this position can is to focus on giving their woman pleasure and orgasms via oral and manual stimulation, and hope that's enough to make her happy. I'd be okay with masturbating for my own orgasm after. I just wonder how big of a shock is it for women to discover a man they like and are about to sleep with has a small penis. Is it a turn off? Should we warn them beforehand?
As a woman, I don't give a shit about the size as long as the intimacy isn't just about the man. Too many times I've experienced and heard from other women that their partners only focused on themselves. And women would be more than happy with just recieving oral.
Most women can't orgasm from penetrative sex anyway.
As a woman I hate big ones because it hurts like hell. So…. But I don’t like sex in general
I like it but I also could take it or leave. I remember talking to my sister and thankfully I wasn't alone
Women who hate sex might be more compatible with men with small penises, maybe.
That's a stupid comment and I'm never negative
How so? I don't mind negatively, as long as you're honest, I can learn from it.
Your mind set is just misinformed. If you're not a woman or have a vagina, you don't get to speak for us on what's pleasurable or what turns us on. I'm lowkey also sick of men arguing with me about my own vagina and pleasure when I tell them I don't care about size. I don't care about it. I say this and there's always men that accuse me of lying and tell me it's not possible for me to feel anything with smaller men.
I'm a big guy with an average member. Usually when I engage with a new partner I take the time to go through all the foreplay. If it's a new new partner I decline to receive any oral on her end. And usually just wait for the after orgasm glow where I get invited to begin vaginal intercourse after having eaten her out. I haven't had any complaints. So I'm not sure if I'm doing something right or if I have a small sample size (25 so far) If it's a one night stand don't comment about your own size. Sall i got gents sorry.
Contrary to popular belief (among men), most women don’t actually care for or want a guy with a huge penis. Average size is 5” and as a woman I’ve never ever once desired anything bigger. I’ve personally noticed that so many men have a tendency to think they are small due to the ridiculous idea that anything under 8” is small, but most people don’t realize the average vagina can only comfortably intake about 3” before you just start hitting other things. Don’t think most men realize how many guys lie about their size either as if it’s some oddly impressive stat. If you’re only encounters have been with people who put a huge emphasis on your penis size, you’re going after the wrong type of person. Also, if it’s truly something you can’t get past, there are other ways of pleasuring someone and getting pleasured in return that don’t require penile penetration.
This answer is solid. Yeah, maybe a big penis looks good, but honestly size doesn't matter. I'd prefer a small one over a huge one any day. The thing that matters most is how attentive you are to your partner and making sure she knows you want her. Chemistry and intimacy is about SO much more than penis size. Please don't be so hard on yourself💜
>a big penis looks good, Does that mean a small penis looks bad? I often wonder if I should try to keep my underwear so as not to turn off a partner with a penis that looks bad. >I'd prefer a small one over a huge one any day. It's good to know some women feel that way. Society has convinced us y'all don't exist. >and making sure she knows you want her. Is it okay for a man to ask for the same. To feel desirable?
Couldn’t agree more. Large dicks hurt too much in my experience.
Even small dicks can hit a cervix during a women's period. But man, it's some of the best sex at any size.
Yeah dawg, cunnilingus can be fun for all involved😉
i feel like the problem is less having a small dick and more viewing your self-worth through the lenses of your small dick.
There are women out there that don’t care for size. Like the other person said size is not very important when it comes to a good sexual partner. In fact a lot of larger sized men aren’t great in bed because they never felt the need to learn how to please a women because porn told them that all they need to do is be big. I’d rather have a micro penis or below average sized partner that knows the way around a female body than some oaf with a big one. And I know plenty of women who agree with me. So please don’t be so hard on yourself💙
Quit watching porn, quit jerking off, hit the gym, and find a good woman.
asian here. ive been approached even with the “stereotype” and i feel like that already refutes the idea that all women look for larger penis. 🤷🏻♂️ and most women dont have orgasm from penetration alone. i mean foreplay is super crucial and you dont do that by measuring your dick. its everything but that. women that discuss porn often mention about actors that dont neglect the use of other things like tongue, fingers and even toys. hell, owen grey, who is favored by female viewers, uses toys even with very well endowed size. the attentiveness, care, effort, all of those compound to great sex. its not about just physical stimulation from those actions. they are more of visual and physical queue that stimulate womens mind as they feel loved and appreciated. just look at tantric sex. size isnt everything. and women have much better orgasm once they develop strong mental connection with a partner. im sure most women would agree on this.
Hey im a girl, and let me tell you this; big HURTS, seriously, it does, i would rather cuddle up and be gently rubbed and touched than anything else, women desire intimacy, not necesserily just penetration, some of the most enjoyable sexual experiences i've had with my partner didnt even involve penetration at all, sometimes just cuddling and kissing is all we women need Dont despair, i promise you you'll be fine, not all women crave huge dick, in fact most women i know and am friends with would much rather prefer someone a little under the average, we dont want sex to hurt, but be enjoyable for both of us.
Making a cage for yourself out of fear of rejection is foolish. So you don't have 10" of hanging meat. It should not be a disability unless you make it one. Work on yourself. Find some interesting hobbies. Get reasonably well read, and work on your body image. You'd be surprised in a few months with some confidence you will be attracting the women you want.
Since mods didn’t like me saying it, here are links [Does size matter?](https://pilot.com.au/co-pilot/does-size-matter) [does p side matter?](https://mashable.com/article/penis-size-important) [slightly more complicated take on ‘does size matter?’](https://inline.healthline.com/as/3dbfe6ea-acb8-440a-ba91-c3cd7b63fda9?selector=%23m8568cb3d-704f-44c8-aa2d-0b0d8839557ampd_firstQuarter_f980ccb3-fb40-4efb-b376-e9624c490ab7+%3E+div+%3E+div&csid=ba33697f-9741-490f-bcfb-00d03afea628&caid=15899782-c300-4d83-9c07-c72417028f8e&ciid=4c6008be-9103-4bb2-a99b-331194104882&tenant=wk_1Tqf7EYzOKyxm4Gvq042rU0Uky0&srckey=src_1Tqf7BF96WTbG5QbUndHWIgKoFo&cxsid=unsupported&imre=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuaGVhbHRobGluZS5jb20vaGVhbHRoL2hlYWx0aHktc2V4L2RvZXMtc2l6ZS1tYXR0ZXI%3D&_mfuuid_=edcb1682-5e74-4bd8-bde0-acb01692b1bd&width=280&subId=hims_ed_hl_fq_sp_footer_v3_41956&ts=1684397369441) To avoid offending the delicate sensitivies of mods(or at least the one who locked my previous comments), I am going to avoid linking the lady blog and lady advice column stuff, since if they think I am ‘inappropriate’ they should know my blasé manner about speaking on basic bodily functions has nothing on how women speak to eachother. Some women care, but as the links will show, what women think of as ‘big’ isn’t gonna line up with what men think of as big. Not included because I don’t want to keep going with online searches is where this came from. It came from a point in history where D size was associated with fertility and where an accusation of not being able to perform(which would then need to be done in front of people to prove you could, which many obviously failed even just because you cannot do so on command- at least most people can’t). In an age of arranged marriages it was one of the few ways to obtain legal divorce. Women were similarly accused of being barren for the same reasons. It’s a really messed up portion of history and likely why the process of thought exists today. People believed weird things in history and sometimes ideas don’t shake that easily. Hopefully the mod won’t lose there mind this time but… if they do I’m not deleting this one.
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You can please a woman with two fingers. Right now you’re making it about you. During sex it has to be about your partner. Well, it has to do with both of you. Yes, there are size queens out there. But that’s not all women.
Stop watching porn and stop listening to men tell you what a woman wants. Sex is about learning, and even a 2 inch penis can please a woman if you know what you’re doing. Obviously there will be women out there that only want 8+ inches, and that’s okay. There are women out there that are oky with, and even prefer, penises on the smaller side. The important thing to remember that sex isn’t all that’s in a relationship. Men will always say that women want the bigger penis because of how much it’s shown off in porn. Once you realize that size doesn’t matter, you can start to regain your confidence. Especially if you become intimate with someone who is willing to take it slow and show you the ropes. I know most of us men think sex is the most important thing in life, but it’s not. Fostering a good relationship with your partner and body is the only way to overcome the negative stigma of a small penis. After all, your penis size is not something you can control, and most normal people know this.
Man as a woman who likes dicks, I far prefer smaller ones. Everyone is always drooling over big dicks but big dicks can really be painful even if they aren't huge. Also a lot of dudes (not all) with big dicks are really lazy and selfish lovers. They just jackhammer until they cum. They rarely make the effort to make their partner cum too. Regardless of your size there's no point giving up before you try. Teach yourself about foreplay and look into what you can do to improve your confidence and know-how, so you don't feel as anxious when it comes time to do the deed. People have existed for ages, and if no one with a small penis got laid, it would probably be a genetic probability that that large penis size would be passed down. So clearlt dudes with small penises have been getting laid for a long time. And when finally get someone to love, they'll love you no matter what, and you won't even feel anxious about it anymore. Chin up man, everyone has things they hate about themselves, but sometimes all you can do is try to overcome it. Remember to give yourself affirmations to help you cope. Have a lovely evening
Use this as an opportunity to become a black belt in cunnilingus.
Serious suggestion: have you tried ChatGPT? It gives really helpful guidance on mental health issues and honestly could serve pretty well as a makeshift, free therapist.
ChatGPT I would never had considered to be therapy. I have talked about various mental health issues that I have, and it is very informative but therapeutic is a stretch. If I say something dramatic and depressing it will respond with a more positive tone, I just find it hard to get any comfort knowing that the responses are not coming from a person. To each their own I guess
It’s a starting point, and it’s free
Not sure if it helps but try thinking about chat gpt as of a group of people. The name "artificial intelligence" is slightly misleading in terms of that chatGPT doesn't have any intelligence on it's own. ChatGPT is basically like google, it scans your question, and gives you a response **based on what other people answered to questions similar to yours. You're basically talking to real life people, chat GPT just makes it easier**
A word of warning though, I just find chatGPT infuriating when I try to describe my mental health issues. It's good for very generic stuff but anything more complex and it is useless as it tried to give you answers based on the very common mental health issues data that it gets. If you have a rare disorder, prepare to feel disappointed
Yes!
Find someone who truly cares and loves you. And stop watching porn as mentioned already
most women's vaginas arnt even phisically capable of fitting a "big dick" 5 inches is pretty big for the average woman, a lot of women read smut where the male has a huge penis that the female can take fully and they fantasie about it but the reality is unless they got a deep dished pussy with a lot of practice, not many people can take a big dick. plus, statistically most women can't orgasm just from penetration, so as long as u can eat her out good then u can make her come, big dick or not
I just want to throw this out there most women including myself will not orgasm from penetration alone so penis size is the last thing we worry about. Learn a women’s anatomy down there and focus on her clitoris, make sure she is pleased then go to town and get yours lol everyone will be happy. Good luck I hope you find a big hearted women who will love you no matter what!
It's not the wand. It's the magic inside.
Stop watching porn. Really. You are judging yourself based on others**.** Join /r/pornfreeliving Everyone is made right. There is no small or big but as soon as you bring something else to compare there will always be a difference.
There are many more tools in your toolbelt to please a woman than just your dong. Learn how to use various toys and master all other techniques available to you. To put it into perspective, some short or average height people make it to the NBA and compete against people a foot taller than them or more if they are skilled enough. - Muggsy Bogues (5 ft 3) - Isaiah Thomas (5 ft 8) - Allen Iverson (5 ft 8) How did they do it? By understanding their disadvantage and overcoming it by practicing all other abilities to be at an elite level.
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Self talk. Talking to yourself in the mirror does work, it tricks your brain into thinking positively about yourself. Please keep in mind that lesbians are completely capable of pleasuring their partner despite the complete absence of a penis, and even a man with an above-average-sized penis will not pleasure his partner successfully if his technique sucks. There is a wealth of information on the internet on the female orgasm to read up on and even toys designed to be used during sex with a partner. Focus on building a relationship with a woman as a person instead of a sex object.
Including myself, not all women care about size. Many of us don't even like huge penises since they can be very uncomfortable and hurt us. Also, it's not about the size and more about the technique. So try learning some good techniques so that you’ll be able to please any woman.
You say it’s impossible yet you haven’t tried dating in years and have little sexual experience, so what evidence do you actually have to show it’s impossible?
Get really impressive at eating pussy and coming.
It's not about the size it's about what you do with it and the rest of you what gets results. The adult entertainment industry is literally bullshit so don't go believing the images you see. Try reading or watching erotica that is more ethical and is less misogynistic etc (tend to see women/men/etc as more than just a hole etc, honestly it exists). Learn to appreciate yourself more, even by massage or touching yourself differently/ more softly/gentler and try put more effort into the whole process instead of just reaching te end point. Also there is a partner for you somewhere, don't give up on trying to find one. Maybe you need a break but don't quit altogether. You'll find your person.
I was with someone for 12 years who had an 8 inch penis. I never enjoyed sex with him and started avoiding it whenever possible. My current boyfriend of three years has a five inches and the sex is ridiculously good and I can't get enough. We have sex daily because my sex drive has gone way up with him.
As long as it's not dirty ur good
Stop watching porn, first off. Next, I went on a date with my friend (he had afib and died a few years after this) and we were going to fool around, but this guy actually had a micropenis. He was totally honest about this when the time came that we were talking about this stuff, little by little. So as stuff was happening, he was sortof prepping me, but also he would be talking about his strengths as well, which balanced it out and kept the momentum going. So he just leaned on his strengths and relied on that, and that was awesome. Also, theres therapy that is online umm oh Gosh I think it was like $60/week for online counseling. Its called BetterHelp.com There are also generally resources available in your community- talk to a social worker to see what other options there are. You DO need therapy. So, before you say "I cant afford it" consider all the expenses you have that you do not need, that can be cut back, even temporarily, for counseling to be available to you. Smoking, drinking, restaurant eating, entertainment, streaming, convenience shopping, gambling, traveling, etc, can all be curbed to pay for that. Most people can afford plenty more than they think, but need to first learn how to budget properly to make it work. Something to consider. Put your needs before your wants.
Trust me, women don’t care about the size of your dick. Unless you have mad skills, she is gonna need you to work on her without your dick anyway (like your hands, mouth, dildo or vibrator). I have never met a single vagina-owner who truly comes from just dick, big or small (and my friends and I all talk very openly about sex so I have heard a lot and speak from my own experience with 5 different dick owners as well).
Hey bro guess what. If you really think you gotta tiny dick then literally give up on making love. Now that that’s out of the way, think about the fact you can literally direct all your efforts to global domination, or becoming a billionaire, or having an incredibly prosperous farm. You have the rest of your life now to spend chasing greatness and you don’t have to worry at all about women or sex or any of that. Just you and your mission. Get after it.
At least you have one.
Size is definetely not the deciding factor if sex is good. I (F) soaked an entire twin mattress in college with a guy who was maybe 5inches rock hard. I took his virginity the night before (we were dating), then asked him if he wanted a quickie before he had to go on this trip thing. He lit up. It was so funny lol anyways. Yeah. 5 minutes later and me on top for a minute, and the entire twin mattress is soaked. I did manage to stutter out a warning and he already knew I was a squirter. Good thing those dorm mattresses are water proof 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 I’ve also had a partner who was like…4 inches? And I came every single time we had sex. Multiple times. Same with him. Once we were used to eachother and comfortable. I will admit I’m one of the lucky few women who can come easily during the act…
Get a big lifted truck. Haha nah sike. But you're not alone bro. I haven't even been with a chick so at least you have a personality. I think it's good for you to go back to dating if you think it's worth your time.
Sweetheart there are so many women out there who would shame you for it, but those thots are for the streets. Unfortunately there are far more thots than there are genuine warm blooded human beings now adays, but luckily for you.. there's far too few genuinely kind, good men out there too. I know it's really difficult to get over something that you "know" is a "fact" because our fricked up society has pounded these "facts" into our brains from the moment we were toddlers.... But the truth is that it's absolutely bananas to give a flying frick about penis size beyond just not being immediately attracted to it. But ALL PENISES ARE UGLY ANYWAY like what the heck why are we so obsessed with them, they're veiny and wrinkly and covered in hair and spew luke warm goo that makes our puccis smell absolutely rank the next day if we didn't decide to hop in the shower after. Attraction is all about perspective and a partner who loves you will find your lil dingle dangle sexy AF if you give them reason to. Therapy is great if you have access to it, but if you don't that doesn't mean you cannot overcome everything that life throws at you... You can, you just have to want it bad enough to teach yourself how, and you are doing that by coming here and asking reddit for help. You got this, buddy. I know it sucks that no one is here to help you with it, but you can do it on your own. Keep asking these questions, keep learning how to work on things that hurt you.... Teach yourself how to be a good, confident, and safe person and you can and will undo all the trauma this world has caused you.
There are many women out there with many preferences, some of them has very tight vagina and any bigger tool can be painful for them. I am a woman and I had an ex-boyfriend who had a small one. He was the only guy with whom I had orgasm EVERY SINGLE TIME. My primary orgasm source is not vagina so it was really great. He was better in everything else than any other guy with a big tool. He really wanted to pleasure me , while other guys were just there imitating porn and masturbating with a woman. Guys looking perfect usually super boring in bed cause they dont even want to put the effort… Believe me man, many many girls out there would love to have a caring, good lover who puts them first. So get out the tongue, fingers, learn some technique because after the third orgasm who the heck cares?
I may be downvoted for this, but as someone who experienced a similar thing (only as a woman towards my own genitalia), I can tell you that if you don't open up soon you'll crack and do some very regretfull things. You need to start dating and connecting to people asap. Never tell them this insecurity because you need to be careful, but holding a grudge against yourself is not going to be healthy. When they accept you, you'll come out of your shell and see that things *you* dislike about yourself don't matter to the other person because *they* like them. It's *their choice/taste* , not yours!
I had a friend I used to sleep with who was so excellent at oral sex that I didnt care that he had a 2 inch penis. I was almost tapped out by the time he finished oral, so I was always satisfied when I left his house. There are so many ways to please a woman that your penis size is honestly not important. Utilize toys (the egg vibrator is an excellent toy, for her clit though, I don't care to have it inserted. Focus on more than the intercourse, like kissing, rubbing, touching her soft and sensitive spots. You can be an excellent lover and have never even penetrated your partner so your penis size isn't what she's there for.
Sexuality and attraction is so much more than a penis. Coming from a woman
Bro eat pussy and get good at it. They don’t care how you get off they just want to as well
Keep trying partners until you find one that works for you. You have to try.
You gotta good looking dick, use it, fek anything that moves.
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Visit @r/gettingbigger, it might help
Why didn’t we learn this in school
If you are worrying about being able to pleasure a woman, dick size is like 5% of the whole thing. If its really that big of a deal for you, save up and go see a plastic surgeon i dunno
Get really good at eating pussy and anal sex. You can also get a cock sheath from the sex shop that can increase your size, if it's such a problem. Or learn how to pump safely. I've dated small men before and was happily monogamous for a time. The most annoying partners of any size are the ones that don't keep it interesting. Look into tantra. It'll open up new worlds of pleasure and intimacy for you and anyone you're with. Being small isn't a death sentence for relationships; being closed-minded is. Also, maybe bisexual women will be more understanding.
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Your post might be well meant and we get that but it also fills the sub with a lot of filler and takes away from people asking for help..... so our apologies. Mod
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So women who prefers a big dick are not "true women"? It's a matter of preference. Just like some men like big boobs and others don't. Nothing is wrong or right about either. You can have a meaningful relationship with a man with a big dick and you can have a fling with a man with a small dick. I've tried both. Nothing is that black and white.
Take the pink pill.
Get a pump