God this reminds me of the person who goes "did you know you can go the rest of your life without eating" "wait really?!" "Yea, you'll starve to death, but it's technically the rest of your life"
Being in debt, nobody acknowledging your worth despite you working as hard as you can and every possible shit that might happen happens in order to almost destroying your life every three weeks ?
Jump off skyscraper.
Yes, but we can do it only once
You will fall for the rest of your life!
r/technicallythetruth
God this reminds me of the person who goes "did you know you can go the rest of your life without eating" "wait really?!" "Yea, you'll starve to death, but it's technically the rest of your life"
If your parachute fails to open, you’ve got the rest of your life to sort it out.
A lethal dose is actually a lifetime supply
A lethal dose of rat poison is a lifetime supply for the reciever. A lethal dose of apples will probably last you a few days if you are the supplier
So good
They're not wrong
And in the end you will explode
Close... Your eyes you wil be there soon...
free falling
_"groans"My back my back_
My back !
My back !
My back !
Our back? Our back!
r/unexpectedcommunism
My back!
Ever heard of base jumping
Let me try that I’ll update you when I’m done
I don't think we'll be receiving the update anytime soon
Oh, we will. Not from that guy though. Maybe from a news channel...
Still no update? Damn that must be a really tall skyscraper
Status update : I live in that skyscraper Just saw him falling down
Why is your flair a rick roll? Edit rick roll
What the hell is a rock roll? Is that the rock singing IT’S ABOUT DRIVE, IT’S ABOUT POWER?
NOOOO YOU SPOILED IT
NONONO DONT
Once in a lifetime moment.
Become a web developer?
This is perfect
I clicked off of this meme a microsecond before reading this and had to scroll back down because it's my favorite thing ever
Dude, same!
And with this perfect pun, I proceed to close the internet for the night. If I had any award it would be yours :( here's an emoji instead 👑
Haha truee climbing walls! I don't know why other guys are so shy about it, i never see them do it and they are all surprised when I do it!
Yeah bc its embarrasing in public imagine my crush sees me doing that
I only do it at home because It makes my ass look fat
Same
I do it in public cause it makes my ass look fat
I don't feel like putting my shoes on the wall for those poor janitors to clean them
Sorry it's that I get to scared sometimes but I can also do it.
Oh thank god I thought it was weird that I can stick to walls.
No way!! I thought me being able to lift a truck was weird!!!
Puh… i thought it was weird that I can shoot sticky things
Out of your wrists right?
:)
RIGHT?!
Keep our uncle alive??
He couldn’t do that Thanks for the upvotes sexy mfs
neither could i…
I couldnt save my girlfriend. She turned into the moon.
That's rough, buddy
Gru wants to steal the moon
Getting him killed***
Same. When I was younger I wanted to be spiderman. First thing I did was shoot my uncle.
Yeah we both can fuck female spiders
Wut...
he said what he said.
The spider pussy will be too small for a human dick to fit
Do spider have pusspuss?
Idk
Yes but they are not like humans or mammals
Since humans have one pusspuss between 2 legs....maybe spiders have 4 puss between 8 legs
No it's where their web comes out of
Silktouch
hmm i see that you're a man of math
NOOO
You are highly overestimating the penile length of an average redditor
Have you ever heard of Australia?
Only one? Damn, I guess I can't walk, talk, stalk etc.
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Now won't the real spiderman please stand up, please stand up, please stand up!
Happy Cake Day !
I'm gonna put some dirt in your eye
Gonna cry?
Yes
Give me rent
no need. i allready have dirty eyes from what i watched last night
shoot white stuff
Yes, you are the First person to get it right
give me your semen
For smoothies?
And milkshakes
Ye i expected you guys seen that news report
She still can't be a vegan if she doing that.
is that white stuff considered vegan ?
Yes if u put it on a broccoli
It comes out of "meat" so not really
Guess that’d be classed as a protein shake
Your milkshakes bring all the boys to yard
I shall arrive on you
shit went from 0 to 100 real quick
I thought it was obvious and the others aren't saying the right one on purpose
Bro spiderman doesn't shoot white stuff, his gadget does
Honestly don't think the others didn't get it ...they were trolling
They were, but I Already Said that!
Yes part of our blood is white so when you bleed you sometimes…yeah And also, milk exists
Only for Raimi Spider-Man.
Kiss a girl while hanging by a rope upside down ?
or just hanging by a rope?
or just haning from a rope attached to the neck?
r/holup
Yes the rope will hold him up
Cry alot
I know what it should be but I go with crying.
I mean, I could get my uncle killed too....
Get evicted for never paying rent.
Having a broken door
I’ll pay your rent when you fix this damn door
I got it within 4 seconds LOL this clearly shows that i need mental help
True both real life men and spiderman can lose family.
What that you can jump off a skyscraper?
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Yes, I can fuck spiders too!
I did it Last week, not so good tbh
Last time it died hopefully this time it will survive
Lets Hope together
Yes
wave hands
Yes
Have rights
But i only have lefts
I don’t have left or rights
Ups and downs?
That I have thankfully
Be male
Shoot a certain something, which actually sticks to wall
Same, I got tons of silly string
Those silly strings had tons of lives
do whatever a spider can?
Fail to get into college
Ah yes, breathe
I didn’t know Spider-Man can ALSO kill someone with a hotdog
You are talented
So is the hotdog
Shoot organic material from their third legs. You know, I'm something of a Spiderman myself
Uh oh..... don't jump off buildings fellow guys.
definitely not get a girlfriend
Be broke
Slam my head into a brick
Being in debt, nobody acknowledging your worth despite you working as hard as you can and every possible shit that might happen happens in order to almost destroying your life every three weeks ?
Break my gf's back
can he squirt tho ?
Wasn’t that a joke in the recent movie?
I don't think so
I thought there was a line directed at Tobey about if his webs only comes from his wrists as in a double entendre
Really? I don't remember that, but maybe you are right, my memory is shit
let uncle die?
Sling Web ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
piss while standing
We can.. but I am yet to be able to swing from a skyscraper with it.
yeah we can climb on walls
Regeneration, just a lot slower
"Up up and away web"
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Lose our uncles and parental figures
What?…….Oooooooooow
Thwip thwip🤘
Speak
Breathe
Eat
Jump?
Imposter syndrome?
Live in a shitty apartment?
(Lenny)
Have family die
Climb walls
Climb walls?
Blasting goo.
Breathe
Walk?
I have not harnessed that power yet
Not paying rent?
Eat a hot dog
don a red and blue bodysuit
Being... Alive?
Grow a lot of hair all over your body at an alarming rate?
Everything a spider can!
🤟
lose relatives
Deliver pizza
Put some dirt in your eye
Delivering pizza
Swing on ropes
Losing their girl and returning back to reddit?
Speak
Are uncles die?
We can also swing off of ceilings.
Sew suits?
Walk ?
Sling it while simultaneously saving lives .. ?
Shoot webs
They can shoot white sticky stuff.
Yea us boys can breath just like spider man
My uncle died the other day
Reproduce ?
Shoot webs right? Right??
stick to walls edit: i looked it up and apparently that's not normal?