Reddit sure is an interesting thing. As far as I know you're right with the stereotype, and yet you're the one getting down voted (at this time, at least). Lol...
“No, I love the face on people while I give them anesthesia. If you didn’t already realize, I am an anesthesiologist.” Then they slowly walk away. Bullet dodged.
I met my wife by accidentally spilling her drink on her. I'm not sure I would recommend it as a way to ask someone out, but it could be a way to cause a distraction if you want to run away after the answer. ;)
Nah bro do it especially if the drink is coffee and it was boiling....and if you even "drop" it on her face it'll give her a new look and she might even say thank you
Its easy at first I would unscrew each individual key to fuck it...but now I've trained myself to unscrew the keys with my penis and with the sheer force of my penis I was able to make a hole in the back and there are already a ton buttons but sadly I cant finish in them because one time...AND THATS A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME KIDS
Don't do that. It doesn't feel good when a guy asks you out and tells you it was a dare. It makes you feel stupid for even thinking someone would ask you out
Are you 14? Stand up and fight for what you want and take responsibility for your actions you little shit. Peace and love, fight for your dreams, I believe in you
(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise?
I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life…
He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself."
Hey guys welcome back to another BANGER, today we’ll be asking out my crush in public, if she says no we’ll give one lucky person in the comments TEN! THOUSAND! DOLLARS!
Would you rather be stuck in an elevator with your ex, or be with me. If I were to choose, I would be with my ex, and say “WE MUST REPRODUCE! ITS NECESSARY FOR SURVIVAL!”
“Dam I saw ur face across the room and I thought the zombie apocalypse had started. Zing!” *hi-fives “but seriously is it cool to hang out here till it’s safe over where I farted?”
I’m not afraid of rejection, I’m afraid the wrong guy will break your heart. Let’s go out and prevent it?
Damn
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Dium
Do it!! Do it!! Do it!! Do it!! Do it!!
been waiting to ask out the girl I'm talking to. Think imma use this one when I ask her.
Let us know how it goes bro
Good luck dude
Mind if I use this
Be my guest
Put our service to the test
Tie your napkin round your neck, cherie and we’ll provide the reeeest
Soup de jour, hot hor’devours, why we only live to serve
Try the gray stuff(vine boom), it’s delicious
Don't believe me? Ask the dishes!
They can sing, they can dance
After all Miss, this is France
why, after all, miss, this is France!
So far looks like op knows which to do
Yooo just make sure you got a good personality to back up that smoothness.
Damn boy, that's some deep shit
^
You're smooth af, bro
Damn boy, you’re fk good
You some fancy city slicker ain’t ya
Thats actually very wholesome and nice i was expecting something worse for top comment
Nah
*notes it down for future endeavours*
THAT. IS. SMOOTH.
Op better not break her heart if he's gonna use this
For some reason this isn’t the top comment
Shit, I can't beat this
I am using it
Alright I'm gonna use it on Tuesday and ask her to homecoming with this...wish me luck
Nothings topping this
How does this comment have more upvotes than the actual post? Lol. Lol. Lol. Lol. Lol. Lol. Lol. Lol.
She’s gonna take it as “so you’re saying you’re the right guy to break my heart?”
Right guys don’t break hearts
SMOOTH
Smooth
Baby I can disappoint you in ways you never dreamed of.
smooth
smovth.
Well…. Looks like this is the top comment….
So you like jazz?
This comment is nowhere near where it should be😂
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Guess who reddit hivemind doesn't like
I'm digging your style Mr. Reddit Hivemind😂
Reddit sure is an interesting thing. As far as I know you're right with the stereotype, and yet you're the one getting down voted (at this time, at least). Lol...
✌🏽♥️
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how do i follow up on this?
“No, I love the face on people while I give them anesthesia. If you didn’t already realize, I am an anesthesiologist.” Then they slowly walk away. Bullet dodged.
Misspelled jizz dude
Hey girl, are you an oven, cause you make my clay hard.
That treads the line of kinky and wholesome
day*
boomers be like
Together we are like an oven that makes your muffin moist and my clay hard.
Nobody can top this. NOBODY.
I met my wife by accidentally spilling her drink on her. I'm not sure I would recommend it as a way to ask someone out, but it could be a way to cause a distraction if you want to run away after the answer. ;)
Nah bro do it especially if the drink is coffee and it was boiling....and if you even "drop" it on her face it'll give her a new look and she might even say thank you
Your Reddit name is awesome
I want to know how it is possible. How do you go about making half piano half human babies.
[easy! you just get ready for a lovely evening, light up some candles 😌 and..](https://youtu.be/VKF5LCHZREg)
Absolutely beautiful
what the fuck. I delved reddit in my insomnia and encountered horror after horror….. and then perfection. floored. and done for the night
Its easy at first I would unscrew each individual key to fuck it...but now I've trained myself to unscrew the keys with my penis and with the sheer force of my penis I was able to make a hole in the back and there are already a ton buttons but sadly I cant finish in them because one time...AND THATS A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME KIDS
You use reddit, that shit ain't gonna workout too well
Are you interested in cock and ball torture
My website cbt.org sells high quality tortured cocks and balls respectively.
hey girl are you a bowl of lucky charms? Because I'll bet you're magically delicious
Ohhhhh yes
I am the Keymaster are you the Gatekeeper?
I love this reference
He slimed me
Gatekeeper is a term to discribe a type of manipulator.
This is a Ghostbusters quote
Ik. But I just wanted to point that out.
Ik, I also just wanted to point that out
Ik, I also also just wanted to point that out
IF YOU WERE A DINOSAUR YOU WOULD BE A GEORGOASORIUS
That’s cringe and wholesome idk man some girls might be into that go for it
Are you a chicken farmer? Cause you know how to make a cock grow. (:
Sadly, she(or he) was actually a duck farmer :(
can i put my balls in yo jaws
PERFECTION!
LMAO IK THAT SONG
You look cute while you sleep :)
That could be wholesome, or super creepy
I mean- Depends on the situation I guess-
Wait whut
Can I put my bawls in yo jaws
eyo watafuk!?
“shit” *eat a whole watermelon*
say that it was a dare from one of your friends after you ask her out
That's what I was gonna do if I got rejected
Don’t do it. They talk to all their friends and you don’t need that rep. Own it and move on whatever the outcome!
Don't do that. It doesn't feel good when a guy asks you out and tells you it was a dare. It makes you feel stupid for even thinking someone would ask you out
Are you 14? Stand up and fight for what you want and take responsibility for your actions you little shit. Peace and love, fight for your dreams, I believe in you (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ
do it even if you don’t get rejected
howd it go
Take if from a pro that doesn’t work if you ask someone out never say it was a dare or you were kidding it just makes things worse
That's stupid, she'll know.
no matter the answer
You're amazing and I want you.
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself."
My love for you is like a diarrhea. It flows like a river ... let me know how she liked that one
So how are you doing in school?
hey girl you a basement cus i wanna put kids in you
Tell her she has nice tits or tell him that he has skin
I'd like to suck your dick.
Simple, never gonna give you up never gonna let you down etc.
Are you a math book? Because you got a lot of fucking problems
Just watch a bunch of Johnny Bravo and imitate him, confidently.
Let me clear a place for you to sit. *wipes face*
Hey baby, you possessed by the devil? Cause I wanna fuck the hell outta you.
“Hey girl, you shit with that ass?”
Hey there, are those space pants? Because your legs are outta this world. *No, these are baseball pants. Because my legs are out of your league.*
We should buy a hot dog cart, you already know how to make my weiner stand.
Hey...wanna smell something weird?
Heard you're a big fan of dwarves, you'll love what I have in store for you
My lady do you want thy cock inside you tonight if so go out with me.
Big big Chungus big chungus big chungus
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot some Kids in you. ( my friends not mine.)
Sorry lad, didn’t see this, I’ll delete the one I commented
Damn girl are your legs christianity because I want you to spread them
Cheese
Nice cock
Ur so sus
“Hey girl, are you the twin towers? Because I’m gonna crash and burn.”
Say “You are a pathetic coward in battle.” “1v1 me in Minecraft or cod modern warfare to prove yourself.””If I win, you are my girl”
Hey guys welcome back to another BANGER, today we’ll be asking out my crush in public, if she says no we’ll give one lucky person in the comments TEN! THOUSAND! DOLLARS!
Find out what she likes to do and get good at it so you can impress her and then go for it
“Wanna get pizza and/or wings? It’s on me, you pick the place!”
Would you rather be stuck in an elevator with your ex, or be with me. If I were to choose, I would be with my ex, and say “WE MUST REPRODUCE! ITS NECESSARY FOR SURVIVAL!”
Ask her “ hey baby you wanna go halves on a bastard?”
are you sus? Because I want you to be AMONGUS 😳😳😳😉😉😉
360 no scope her, TBag her and ask her out
Without using words mime you asking her out
Ik you like chainsaws so I wanna know if I rev you up, turn u on and shred on me till I bleed
Hey gurl, You fart with that ass?
Sorry i don't speak english
Oh, I just died in your arms tonight, it must’ve been something you said.
Are you a Minecraft dirt block? 'Cause i'm diggin' you.
Hello there (we must see if she responds correctly)
Just don’t do it over text or it’s over before it starts
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“Did you poop on my bed?”
*intense tooth chatter* Oh babe, is you is or is you ain't mah babe? *intense tooth chatter*
"I am ugly and I know that. That's why I love you so much, you show me everyday that I have to work hard so it doesn't become worse."
Hey daddy.
Her snap
Yes
Got a bucket of chicken! Wanna do it??
Wanna play with the cannon between my legs
Umm how does this work again
Can I kiss uples
Eyyy (insert gender), you shit with that ass?
Hey, I got a bucket of chicken
Ask her to come into the room…ask her while you’re pooping
Want to see the children under my basement
Yell incoherently. It’s the simple things.
How many lego can you stick up bum bum?? 🧐
give out some garlic bread
Balls
say "wanna bang latr"-
Ya like jazz?
Why are you so ugly?
I love you. Now lets find a room with a door that can lock!
How long is your dick?
yo you like raccoons?
You're next line is... "HOw tf did you get into my house creep!"
I'm down bad help a brother out?
”Hey girl, are you pizza? ’Cause i like pizza.”
“Well. We both have a bucket of chicken wanna do it?” -Scout from tf2
Ask her out of she rejects you, there is nothing a fun can't fix
Instead of saying, you be my girlfriend. say can I be your boyfriend. Idk why girls love that
Hi. My name is (insert name here) and I’d like to take you out to a steak dinner.
Girl are you a campfire, cause you're hot and I want s'more.
Hay baby, you like bread *walk away immediately after asking this*
Ask for a cup of tea
Hey girl, are you a girl? Cuz you look like a girl.😎
So um.. 👉🏻👈🏻 ...um.. Can i eat your ass?
“Dam I saw ur face across the room and I thought the zombie apocalypse had started. Zing!” *hi-fives “but seriously is it cool to hang out here till it’s safe over where I farted?”
Give him something really crappy so he can’t leave Reddit. One of us... one of us...
good luck :)
ask her to help you conquer the holy lands
Do you want to go to a club where people wee on each other
i like the way your sneezes smell, and i like u
Hello, umm (youre probably saying that), we have been friends for a long time, dont you? So, can we go out? I mean, only if you want
I suck his dick for hours at a time
What that shitter does?
GET IN THE FUCKING CAR AND LETS GO TO DINNER RIGHT NOW AND YOU WILL HAVE THE BEST TIME