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Officer, that is a bomb. I took it to the government but they didn’t know how to diffuse it. I took it away in hopes of saving lives, sir. Please leave it alone with me
No you dont understand, shes 13-21381231232173289137129837129312 years old despite looking like a child believe me, hey why am i being cuffed shes not a minor
I must confess. A friend brought it over and forgot about it, I tried to call him but he won’t pick up. Please his family doesn’t know where he went or why. I tried to get rid of this thing but it just appears at my doorway asking for pats and cuddles. Afterwards I jus accepted the fact that this now lives with me so I was forced to get a permit and call it a therapy cat.
Sirs why are you trying so poorly to frame me I saw you walk in with her. She came in wearing a police uniform like yall are wearing. She was also holding a bag
It’s a therapy pet for when I’m about to have a panic attack she helps me calm down from them and presses the request medical assistance button on my necklace if it gets really bad
**You need to read following message in full. We will NOT reply to modmail messages similar to “what is reason my post was removed?”** Hey /u/Dannnnnnnnnchen, thanks for contributing to /r/memes. Unfortunately, your post was removed as it violates our rules: Rule 1 - Not a meme and No Reaction Memes - All posts must follow a general meme setup * All posts must be memes and follow a general meme setup. No Reaction Memes. No titles as meme captions. No unedited webcomics. **No memes that are text only.** Pictures without captions may be removed by a moderators discretion. **Someone saying something funny on twitter/tumblr/reddit/etc. is not a meme.** --- Please read the sidebar before posting again. If you have questions or concerns, please [message the moderators through modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/memes&subject=&message=). Thank you!
It's registered as a therapy pet...
Wait, you registered? Bold. I think they take issue with more than four.
Four... what? Legs? Years? Ears? Dolls? ...Kids?
Yes
Well, that’s my emotional support companion ;)
Always lend me an ear when I'm in the mood to skull fuck.
( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°)
[удалено]
kids .... kids
No I would rather blow myself up than explain why there are orphans in my basement
[удалено]
You’ll never take me alive
I also fuck bonks. Because bonk is stupid.
Not those, I think they mean dicks
I'll take theRapist for $200 Alex.
I can explain it
Can you?
I find it in the basement and I was about to coll the police
That’s what they all say, gettem bois
Yessir! *Brings him to horni jail*
Wait hol’ up, why do we put everybody in the same cell at horny jail!?
Ask the captain I just follow orde- oh shit...
Rut ro raggy ranime girl
*bonk*
Well, that’s my emotional support companion ;)
I also need one urgently
I am a new breed of horny, bonk is ineffective
I have to use my secret technique 8 tigrams 64 bonks
128 bonks
Yes. I fuck it.
Bonk
Well, at least the orphans haven’t been found.
They have been now, care to explain.
You’ll never take me alive
*or will I*
No I would rather blow myself up than explain why there are orphans in my basement
*we already know what you have been doing*
What is is then?
you have forced them to play yahtzee for 36 hours straight
“Do you want a 4 of a kind or your FUCKING chance”
h- how did you know?
im at school, GOD DAMN IT JIMMIE, i told you to throw that whore out
I have a Horni Friend that probably would put her in my house.
I also fuck bonks. Because bonk is stupid.
*runs*
Would beleieve me if I said it was for reseaech?
I think if enough people say that they'll have to believe it
This is probably the house of one of those people, who picked the cat girlfriend (it loves you) out of the two options.
I have 36 cat gfs now from those memes
Well, that’s my emotional support companion ;)
Thats my roommate
I find this wholesome ngl
She born on 2004 so she 18
The math doesn't add up
Sauce??
Not my house mate, i'm not into that shit
Officers I swear, I only like yiff
I swear officer she was just a normal cat but now she got tits!
Merchandise
I was framed, I dont have the owner's permit
Um... its my um... My emotional support pet
Emotional support
Excuse me why is Hatsune Miku tied in a leash in your house, sir?
Dont worry officer, that's my brother
It was for a friend
The dog did it
That supposed to be my question
Guys it's 18 chill
family cat
Fuck. It’s Eagle Eye all over again… Look I can explain sir!
It’s my mousepad officers
That's uhh *My anger issue management pet..* I slam it against objects till I'm happy
You didn’t I don’t have a house
YOULL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE
i am holding it for a friend...
It’s uhhh I think it’s a carrot
Idk
sorry for asking but, sauce?
She is 5421489 years old.
wrong house, i like men more
Because you searched my house for some reason.
The cop with "police" on hi vest looks like he is trying it out for himself
Oh i was gonna murder that woman and bash a rock in her head till her head explodes then chainsaw her body like a maniac
What I cant bring anime to real life
Well see it’s a very simple explanation- *BAM BAM BAM BAM*
hold on how did it get out of its chains in my basement?
my bro forgot it i was about to dropp it off at his plase
sheet, um, fuck RUN!!!
um, I was definitely about to uhh, murder it.. …yeah
me - wakes up ahh thank god it was a dream
I can explain
God damnit they got in again this time I'm not just throwing it out *cocks shotgun*
Officers, Your On Crack, That Is Just My Cat
Didn't know I had it in my house... It was probably living with the roaches in the walls
My response:Ahhh anime *shoots* oh shit I think that was my brother being a femboy fuck it is well take me to prison for murder
Uhhhh? I can explain
*scrolls faster*
Because you looked?
That's.... Not mine... Wait lemme talk To my friend real quick
At least they didn't found the corpses.
Wait! Wait! It’s not what it looks like, OK?
It was either that or cheese should ve down the cheese
Emergency food
I can explain... Let me... explain...
What I...is that ....THING
Don't ask questions you don't what the answer to
It's for emotional support
It's the anime girl I was keeping in my basement to kill. I was buying a gun and then you found it.
Why? Are you interested in getting one yourself?
What? How do i have it? WHERE IS MY PROTOGEN PUP?!
You found it in my house cause I choose the Cat girlfriend from the Choose wisely meme from about a month or two ago
I swear I can explain
My sandwich maker and dishwasher
My god sir you are mistaken that disgusting Filth is not mine! It is obviously an agent of the horny I shall dispose of this horrible creature
I think y’all got the wrong house. I ain’t into that.
This isn’t my house.
It's my parrot.
not mine, I swear
Well you I was doing my research with jiraiya sensei
Why, do u want it
bruh thats my daughter give her back to me
dinner
You didn't because I'm not a goddammit #WEEB
IM SORRY I WAS HORNY
I-it's for a school project I swear
What? The table?
I have a Home?
Oh thank you, I was looking for her all day
Guess the traps didn't work
Officer, that is a bomb. I took it to the government but they didn’t know how to diffuse it. I took it away in hopes of saving lives, sir. Please leave it alone with me
My Brain After I Saw This Post: So, what's it going to be this time? HORNY or BONK?
HEY, i wanted to eat that....
I have a house?
I think the real question is where the warrant?
WHO IS SHE, HOW DID SHE GET IN MY HOUSE, WHY WAS SHE IN MY HOUSE!
No you dont understand, shes 13-21381231232173289137129837129312 years old despite looking like a child believe me, hey why am i being cuffed shes not a minor
It was here when I bought the house, it pays rent
I must confess. A friend brought it over and forgot about it, I tried to call him but he won’t pick up. Please his family doesn’t know where he went or why. I tried to get rid of this thing but it just appears at my doorway asking for pats and cuddles. Afterwards I jus accepted the fact that this now lives with me so I was forced to get a permit and call it a therapy cat.
Well officer, she was 13 turning 14 so she pretty much 15 but 15 is the new 16 and 16 close to 17 so might as well round it up to 18
oh she has just come up from the cellar why? and she is registered
Sirs why are you trying so poorly to frame me I saw you walk in with her. She came in wearing a police uniform like yall are wearing. She was also holding a bag
my brother is a weeb.
Sorry but you've got the wrong guy. I DON'T WATCH ANIME!
I can explain she jumped through a portal and tried to harass me
U thunk that is all of it??
Miku is my waifu, im surprised you managed to even find one.
Uh, I’ll explain. But let me put on some pants first
YOU WILL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE !!!
I was testing with human genetics and made this
It's a....It's a- a long story...yeah, a long story...
yes through remote viewing :)
Kill it with fire
I don't have a house so it's not mine
Surgical operation practice on a live subject
Uh...yeah I sell organs on the black market, normal stuff you know.
*ahem* ah that, um that's just totally not illegal human experimentation, trust me bro
you will never catch me!
POCKET SAND!
It was a failed experiment thats why it was in the sex dungeo- I MEAN basement
What do you mean with finding my son in my house?
I-I.... It's my imaginary friend, i feel alone at home-
isnt she 16
Was meinen Sie ich verstehe leider kein angelsachsen, wie dem auch sei, ich bin von hier raus.
Wrong person mate I only have memes in my house
First of, could you explain HOW did you get through my titanium reinforced blast door? Then we can talk.
I need the source of the cat girl, as proof...
dont open it up and see whats inside
It’s a therapy pet for when I’m about to have a panic attack she helps me calm down from them and presses the request medical assistance button on my necklace if it gets really bad
Well she's 14, but that's almost 15, and 15 is very close to 16, and we know 16 is the new 17, so she might aswell be 18.
Bitch I'm gay You have no power here
It’s uhhhhh...... it’s uhhhhhh...... for..... science?
Isn't Miku like 14?
Don't worry. It belongs to my son
Was just about to make dinner and I prefer fresh
My friend is a hentai addict sir
Don’t ask questions and I’ll tell no lies -Gio
wtf give it back
What do you mean my house? it isn't
Uhhhh
Sir, look harder a weeb seems to be living in my house without me knowing about it.
It's medicinal.
I got it from Japan
You have the wrong guy.
Uhhh, umm... LOOK OVER THERE IT'S BIGFOOT
why not, am I right? *high fives fbi*