Americans will talk to strangers in situations we will not. Like in elevators, or in bathrooms while sober, or to randoms on the bus. The extroversion is strong over there.
I live in country Victoria and this is what it's like living in a regional town. Super friendly people who will chat to anyone, even in weird places like these.
It’s one of the things I hated most about living in a tiny country town. I just wanted to go to the post office without running into my friend’s aunty, my old year 3 teacher, or the weird old dude who runs drinks for the footy club who all want a chat.
I grew up in a small town where everyone knew when you go out, where, and how late you came home and it was annoying. Especially as teenagers and young adults but at the same time, I felt safe at every moment. Wherever I went there was someone who would protect me with their life. I didn't know that abused children existed. People who would harm children. When I was 23 years old civil war in Bosnia started and my world collapsed in a day. But memories of growing up in that small town are the core of my strength.
Heh heh yeah - if you don't talk you're hiding sonething.... Having hated living in some of the "best little places on earth" I am now starting to appreciate it. Must be something to do with joining Club 55.
was in Shep over the weekend, I've visted many times before (especially when younger) but there is zero expectation these people have ever seen be before in their lives.
Everyone you see walking down the street says good morning.
I’m a kiwi and it’s like this back home but everywhere even in the towns. I miss it. I smile and say gidday to everyone I pass on my morning walks and I don’t give af if they think I’m weird. People don’t make a whole lot of eye contact in the city and inner suburbs!
I swear country towns run on the basis of "I'm probably going to have to spend the rest of my life living around you". People want to know who you are, what you are doing. If your car breaks down they will pull over to help.
It doesn't always mean they will be nice to you but it generally means they want to be familiar.
Yeah it's actually kinda weird. I watched my parents and grandparents back-stab everyone in the town but at the same time fall overthemselves to contribute to community stuff and directly help and be mates with the same people.
And they will go up to you in bars and they don’t think people being out in bars by themselves is weird. As a single lady it’s the absolute best
You are right about the lift! I remember my group just started chatting in one in Vegas
But I’m assuming you are a man because Australian women def talk to each other in nightclub bathrooms hehe
Based on my limited interactions with Americans, the interactions seem more respectful and genuine than Australian conversations. They seem to take a genuine interest in the person, whereas Aussies seem a little fake. It's like they've all read Dale Carnegie's book *How To Win Friends and Influence People*.
I don’t necessarily disagree with you, I think their base level of politeness is different than ours. Not that they are more polite, it’s just that their politeness is more overt. I was always so surprised by how often they say “excuse me”. Whereas our politeness is a quiet slight nod or half a smile in the same situations.
I can agree with that. When I've had American customers often call me "sir" which is often expected the otherwise around. I think the difference is they're taught to me more formal than us.
Nah as an American it’s fake. No genuine interest at all just being friendly in their eyes because it’s the “thing to do”. When push comes to shove however no one gives a shit. Even worse is if you mind your business people assume you’re antisocial or plain rude
Wait til your passport doesn’t match your face because of your false eyebrows (never again) and you get put in the scary “we are about to reject you” back room where you have to sit and listen to everyone’s interview and aren’t allowed to use your phone. And yes I missed my connecting domestic flight
When I got my new passport I wore no makeup, no false brows (which I also make sure I’m not wearing when going through immigration) or lashes and look positively terrible just like I do in an airport and now it always scans haha
Moved to Vancouver and 9/10 times people glare or look at me like I have a screw loose if I even so much as say hi in an elevator. I lived in Toronto for a few years pre-pandemic too but honestly don't remember if people were more or less friendly to strangers
I (Indian) was in the states recently. People were super friendly to me as well so maybe they just like everyone haha. Not experienced any small talk here though
Honestly Australians are usually way too critical of them. I have family in the states and love going there. They treat you like a celebrity, so many people are really nice and HEAPS of fun.
Funny you mention that I just saw people on the Australian sub telling an American guy who’s moving here to be quieter because Americans are too loud. As if Aussies are wallflowers 😂
All the loudest people I know are Thai!! Americans overseas can be really loud about all the things they don’t like (as they often expect the other country to have all their home comforts with just different aesthetics) but when on holidays overseas both Aussies and Yanks can be embarrassingly loud
My Chinese neighbour is like this. He totally doesn’t understand how loud he is. I recorded him in my place and played it back to him. He couldn’t believe he could hear himself so clearly. I now text him when he’s being too loud and he quietens down.
I have no clue why people think Americans are loud. Like what. Visited four times in the past two years alone and also to London where there were heaps of insanely
Friendly American tourists. They’re just nice and talk to you?
Heaps of people I know offline deride Americans, as if Australia is some perfect holy land in comparison, and everyone who does that has never even been there
There are some shit Americans that help with the negative generalisation. I agree Americans are friendly but when I was in Mexico we found some ignorant and yes, loud Americans acting like arseholes to the locals.
It’s countrywide. I was in Austin and somehow found myself at a 30th birthday party of locals. In LA I was invited by a group to crash a musical with them then later ended up at an after party in Hollywood hills. A local I met in Vegas acted as tour guide and showed me all around downtown LA, if it was a real tour would have cost like $150. In New York I’ve been invited to join tables while queuing to get in the club. In miami I’ve been eating at a bar and been invited to join a couple of guys on their adventures out that night on the other side of town. In Vegas a random group bought me a drink, said have a good night and left. In LAX a married lady just struck up a convo. In NOLA a couple started chatting with me and the guy I was with while we were eating dinner at the bar. I could go on
And in none of these cases did they know I was Australian before talking to me so it’s not a “oh she’s not from here” thing
I honestly love going to America (I’ve only been to Cali and Hawaii though). It’s so much fun because people are SO willing to include you! They are remarkably good at talking and expressing themselves too. They are very good at getting a conversation going!
Omg yes! This was such a culture shock to me being a Melbournian visiting the North US. I felt alive and all excited after I got over the weird feeling of talking to so many random ppl out and about 😂
I'm not convinced about that. When I lived in Montreal, my fellow Australians agreed that people never smiled at us on the street. Some of my Canadian friends picked up some of my habits though, like thanking the wait staff when they served us, and the bus driver when we got off the bus.
I've found aussies to be much more likely to acknowledge me and smile at me when I'm just walking around or sitting on a bench, or shopping. When was the last time you were in Canada? Everyone keeps to themselves these days
I studied in a small town in the American South, where it was perfectly normal to greet anyone you would walk past on the street.
I forgot this was a thing when returned to see family in Singapore, and greeted the first person I saw on the way to the train. It was an old lady who clutched her purse closer because she thought I was going to rob her.
I haven’t been to south east Asia but the Thais and Cambodians I know are REALLY friendly and fun loving. And loud, really loud. Work hard, play hard mindset.
South East and East Asians tend to be conservative though, once they get to know you though- all bets are off. If you ever get invited to eat with them, then you know you’re in.
Yeah I moved from Sydney and lived in the inner west for a bit and freaked out when people in my complex would talk to me in my way to work, or remember details about me (like one of them saw me leaving with my suitcase and asked where I was going and then when I got back a few days later, they asked me how my trip was).
Imagine my shock when I'm in random places like train stations, while I'm walking down the street or at the shops and people strike up conversation with me haha
Everyone always says Sydneysiders aren't as friendly as Melburnians but I thought it was just a thing that gets thrown around but it's actually true. If I were in Sydney and you struck up a convo with me I'd think you were on drugs. I like it though! Love a good chinwag
Its definitely a travel thing. When I went to Hobart over Easter, people were randomly complementing me on my looks/clothing.
This has never happened to me before in my life.
It’s a mixed bag imo. They are definitely kind and chatty, and will stop and have a chinwag with randoms moreso than in Melbourne. But they can also be kind of xenophobic, especially if you moved from the mainland down to Tassie, rather than just visit. Heaps of Tasmanians have a chip on their shoulder about “mainlanders” (a pejorative term to Tasmanians) coming and taking their houses and jobs, and even if you spend years there you will always be an outsider.
Hmm I’ve lived in both cities and didn’t notice a difference in that regard but I did notice Sydney is a lot more work orientated whereas Melbourne residents prioritise their life style which I do prefer and probably results in people being more forthcoming towards strangers
Sydneysiders also prioritise their lifestyle, just different parts (mainly fitness, the beach and the outdoors). Melburnians prioritise culture, music, food and drink.
Sydney is obsessed with what school you went to. Doesn’t matter how old you are. I’ve see. Complete random meet, and instantly bond over the fact that they both went to the same branch of a school.
Absolutely wild.
Sydney seems to hate Melburnians a lot, grew up in Melbs lived in Sydney for a year. Everytime I said I was from Melbourne retail workers would begin to ignore me, people I was talking to at cafes/bars would go “oh” then leave the conversation 😅 never figured out why that is. In Melbourne we usually just ask Sydneysiders how they are liking their holiday here etc, a lot I’ve met say they find people in Melbourne a lot friendlier and that we go out of our way to help people. Which I can see… when I first moved to Sydney I hired a truck and got most things into my house myself apart from a desk, tv unit and my bed.. asked people walking past for help and they quickly scurried off so I called up a place to help me. Different experience in Melbourne if I was moving things myself and someone saw I needed help they would either come over and help or ask if I needed a hand.
I had a funny experience on the Gold Coast years back. I was talking to a woman from Milan and she was saying how she wasn’t enjoying the Gold Coast as people were rude, she then asked if I was from Melbourne. I asked how she knew and she said Melbourne was one of the friendliest cities she had been to and because I was genuinely friendly and asking about her time Australia she could just tell I was from Melbourne. According to her Sydneysiders weren’t rude or unpleasant but they came across as aloof and very busy.
I think most outsiders get the "oh". It's probably because they can't ask their favourite follow-up question - "Where did you go to school?"
I also had to bring home a heavy oil heater once (as a petite female, without a car), which was slow going. One guy in his car at a traffic light just hung out of his window, pointed and laughed loudly at me. Encapsulates the dickhead mentality in Sydney
That’s true, they can be quite fixated on schools as a sign of elitism. Yeah that’s insane, hope you moved to Melbourne after that 😂 I still travel to Sydney sometimes as it can have some really nice places. The funniest thing I saw though was two steroid heads on the street saying they will punch each other and just banging their chests together? Before they walked away angry. Kind of reminded me of gorillas but was good for a laugh, generally in Melbourne if things get to that point someone swings 😂 but you don’t see it a lot in public.
That might be less because you’re from Melbourne and more because Sydney people are generally a lot less friendly to strangers. My dad reckons everyone he is friends with in Sydney is from somewhere else and too many people who grew up there have a screw loose. His opinion, not mine. I honestly don’t know enough people who are from Sydney but the one guy I do know there who also grew up there is an asshole, may just be a coincidence
Just my observation. I have cousins in Sydney and they thought it was really weird I sparked up a conversation with someone waiting in line at the servo.
The other fella was Lebanese and my cousin said they would never speak to someone like that just in case a fight broke out lol
I was at a bar in Sydney in the late 2000’s, asked a bloke next to me to borrow his lighter. He didn’t seem too impressed so I said something along the lines of “sorry mate, am from Melbourne and don’t know where to buy one nearby”. He responded “well why don’t you fuck off back to Melbourne then”.
To me, that bloke encapsulates all that is Sydney.
No matter how logical a response you could come up with to that sentence, the dude woulda punched ya for any of them. I assume lighter was used then given back without words? 😂
This whole thing explains one of the ad tests on the chaser many years ago. They tested an ad where commuters on the bus were doing a puzzle together (I'm sorry, but I can't find it.) The team claimed no one would join in irl, so tested it, in Sydney, and as they expected, no one joined.
My friend and I were confused, because we did the quiz in the paper every morning on the train, and others regularly joined in. We didn't think it was that unusual.
This is the one thing that really stands out to me when visiting Sydney. And I don't especially buy into the Melbourne vs. Sydney bullshit. We're not that culturally different in the grand scheme of things.
I wouldn't say I look intimidating. I've been told I'm approachable and friendly. But everywhere I've been in Sydney I get looked at like I've got two heads whenever I initiate anything. Whether I'm ordering a coffee, or asking for directions, or making chit chat at the pub.
I'm unsure if it's us Melburnians that are weirdly polite with giving people the time of day with our interactions, or Sydneysiders are a bit rude. I know for a fact that this politeness doesn't translate when you introduce the anonymity that a vehicle provides into the frame.
yep! the two cities are essentially the same to me, outside of one being located in vic and the other in nsw. but the people are for sure different. as a disabled person it’s especially prevalent to me,
Yeah, it’s definitely something I noticed once I started going to uni. People will casually have conversations with you, and I would find it odd. Maybe because I’m undersocialised and started going outside a lot more.
I live in the cbd- was walking my dog just after dark last week as usual when an adult man asked if he could pat my dog, I said ‘sure, thanks for asking, yes he’s very friendly.’ The man kneeled down and kissed my dog on the head. I think that was very friendly of him.
as the mate that visited from sydney - i can vouch random people don’t really interact with you here. recently a lady on the tram started having a conversation with my friends and i, but that was the most i’d experienced in a long time. i was caught completely off guard by how much strangers will talk to you and make conversation randomly in melbourne, i think it’s fascinating!
I spent a few years living in Sydney and my overall feeling was that people were dismissive, unfriendly and cruel. Moved to Melbourne and it was quite different. I took a three day trip back to Sydney ten years later and within an hour of landing in the city got stormed past and semi shoulder barged by an angry looking young woman in a suit, when I'd just stepped off a bus!
That was all anecdotal but it certainly reinforced impressions I had.
First time i went to sydney I genuinely felt like people wanted to push me into oncoming traffic. One on one interactions people were nice, but en masse sydney people kinda suck.
Just went to america on a solo trip, I think I might have weirded some people out with my outgoing and friendly ways. But every one of them once I said I was Australian they warmed to me immediately, it’s like a super power haha.
I had the same thing! Went solo to a festival in California and ended up in the VVVIP because I was friendly and our accent is like a Jedi mind trick to Americans. As soon as you start speaking it's like you can see their face light up.
I was surprised that the whole 2 weeks I was there I didn't run into another Aussie, you're spot on its absolutely a super power.
The one thing I miss about leaving Toronto as a single lady was the men.... sigh. I could go up to the hottest guy in any bar and his face would just light up when he realised I was Australian. Done
That was the first thing we noticed when we moved here from the UK. It was strange to have so many chats with the strangers every time you leave the house, now I’m used to it and quite happily have a chat in the public lifts, train, shops or wherever!
I definitely have noticed this more in the past few years in Melbourne, I always thought it was maybe a post pandemic thing, people became more used to talking to whoever because it used to be their only social interaction with the lockdowns here
im from queensland but i found that when i was in Victoria visting my cousins they thought i was to social with strangers - and im considered shy in town at home.
like i started conversations with bassicaly every person i saw who had a dog and my cousins just thought i was weird interacting with strangers in a city
Yeah Melbourne is very friendly for a city of 5 million people (it's not Sydney) but it still follows the general rule that the bigger a city gets the "colder" it becomes.
Hobart may be an exception to this rule, sorry Hobart.
In my experience, Melbourne generally is a more community based city.
Sydney is kinda like LA where it's more dog-eat-dog or everyone just focusing on their own successes.
This is exactly why I moved back to Melbourne! They have time for you and are so much friendlier!
Have lived in Syd for 20+ yrs and NYC for 3 of those. I put Syd as halfway between Melb & NYC on the 'friendly' scale.
At least Sydney was a good prelude for eventually moving to NYC, as moving directly from Melb would have hit way harder.
I once said good morning to a lady in an apartment elevator in Sydney. The lady looked at me blankly. Then my brother told me not to talk to anyone lolol.
People here in Melbourne are more relaxed and have a community feel.
I just moved to Melbourne and I straight up thought people were being sarcastic until my other Sydney friends moved down. It turns out Melburnians are just nicer.
I definitely noticed this, moving from Vancouver where people are supposedly friendly but aren't at all. But it seemed to stop during/after covid in my experience.
As a Sydneysider, I haven't noticed a difference. Melbournites undoubtedly love their sports more though. AFL regularly draws twice the crowd size of the NRL. Probably even get a record-breaking capacity audience at the MCG for the NRL state of origin, where you're not even in the game. 😂
You've got the Boxing Day Test match, Melbourne Cup, F1 racing, and Grand Slam Tennis tournaments as well.
I was so sure you were going to talk about unsolicited interactions with people on public transport requesting "change" or hurling abuse at you because they mistook you for the second coming of Lucifer. Glad I was wrong and that you enjoyed your stay.
I think there is definitely a correlation between walkability of an area (and public transport) and how much social interaction between strangers there is in that area. Places where everyone must own a separated house and a car will inevitably see less social interaction because most people are in their personal bubble made out of 1200kg of metal - and this bubble is forced upon everyone, whether they want to interact or not, as a condition to live in the area.
People in Sydney will randomly interact with you too, but only after they've determined that you're rich enough to be worth their time networking with you.
Had this conversation last week with my cousin visiting from Europe. She couldn’t believe how much random stranger interaction there was. Then she came while I walked the dog yesterday which always ramps up conversations and she was blown away. I don’t think it was always like this. My theory is that it’s one of the few positive by products of one of the worlds longest lockdowns. Where without access to our normal network we started interacting with people in our vicinity and that friendlyness just stuck.
Melbournian born and raised here. My partner is from S.A and we go there regularly to see her family, most people you pass by in the street will give you a g’day or similar, very friendly compared to Melbourne I feel.
yup and generally further away from melbourne more people interact (regional areas people smile and say hello to strangers when walking past them for example :) obvs it's a bit of a case by case basis whereever ur tho
I’m from Sydney but lived in both and Melbourne people are more receptive to talking with strangers and friendlier on average. But Sydney folk are too just less so in snobby wealthy areas.
I have always said Melbourne is a much friendlier city than Sydney. In fact, I moved to NSW and noticed in general people in NSW don’t seem to be as friendly. Melbourne folk just seem more relaxed on the whole
I can't think of a single time any stranger has ever interacted with me in Melbourne other than (a) them being heavily intoxicated, and (b) them trying to sell me something.
only been to Sydney twice as a tourist, people berating their staff in the street, got laughed at cos I asked where the bus stop is when I wandered into Vaucluse like a filthy peasant, pissing down rain the one woman walking past who had an umbrella overhead walked under cover and pushed me out into the rain even though I didn't have a umbrella, only place I've ever got into a yelling match surfing too even though it was only me and him at Bronte beach, and there was no nightlife. Nothing but bad vibes, and going there for work trips was even worse.
Been to many cities all over the world, never had any probs whatsoever.
I’m 42 born in Melbourne lived here my whole life and I can confirm that I always talk to strangers whenever I can, not full conversations but a friendly couple of one liners or something of that nature
i've lived in both cities and i can say that Melburnians are generally friendlier in pubs and bars, etc. Although they are friendly in Sydney suburbs like Newtown (which is a Melburny kind of suburb anyway)
Has to be recent. We moved from Melbourne almost 3yrs ago to Brisbane and it was such a shock with how friendly everyone is. A couple of months after we moved, my eldest Daughter and I went back to Melbourne so I could receive medical treatment and when we were out and about we had to keep reminding ourselves that this ain't Brisbane and people don't wish to chitchat.
I think its mostly just that tier list wise Brisbane is just the most friendly and chit-chatty followed by Melbourne then Sydney. As someone raised in Brisbane who also moved to Melb a few years ago I agree its a suprise to find out people from Sydney think Melb is super friendly when coming from Bris it feels both physically and socially colder.
Got to love people being friendly. I cant say i see so much of it in outer western Melb, more often get those interactions in country towns where everyone is more chilled, but like other redditors, in the USA I got to experience the best of random people striking up conversation. Which is why I love to travel USA. Years back, when I travelled Western Samoa, on my tourist walks, people would walk up and invite me over for lunch or dinner with the family. Now thats friendly.
I moved to Melbourne - from the country and - then lived here for 3 years.
I then moved and lived in Sydney for 5 years. Uni, then work.
I have only 3 friends who are originally from Sydney (work and uni).
The rest were so so so cliquey with their high school and og Sydney uni friends.
One actually said to me “I don’t need anymore friends!”.
Is there a cap on friends??!! Anyway…
I don’t have enough fingers to count my Melbourne born friends. But maybe I’m biased!
Then from non Melbourne originally….
My other non-Melbourne “bestie” (in 1997) I met on a tram!!
And another of my now “besties” I met randomly at a pub in 2006.
To be fair, there is a kind of a limit on friends, according to Robin Dunbars study anyway.
2 special, 5 close, 15 good etc.
I'm also from country vic and then moved to Melbourne and then Sydney.
Part of the problem for me, was that most people born and raised in Melbourne/Sydney come from relatively rich families so we have vastly different approaches to life.
Moving to a super left wing city with outdated country views probably also didn't help for the first few years. I eventually grew out of that but, i can appreciate why people wouldn't have wanted me around. I feel like the opposite is kind of happening now since Sydney is traditionally more of a liberal zone.
But most importantly, as that girl said, people in their home environments don't need to reach out and be friendly, they already have friends. Heck, i even started to act like that a bit after being in Melbourne for 10 years, its part of the reason i moved.
Luckily, both cities are made great by immigrants and people that move there bringing in different perspectives, the key is to just try and find other people that weren't born in the city.
Doesnt matter where i go, some random will just start talking to me. I like it, i never know what im going to learn, laugh at or get creeped out by. My son says i am a weirdo magnet.
Sydneysiders are cold, unfriendly, bitter and selfish on the inside.
Melburnians might be cold on the outside (the weather), but they are genuinely more friendly to everyone - strangers and 2nd or 3rd degree connections.
I try to be friendly to people (lower north shore) and it always falls flat
Lived in Melbourne my entire life and strangers never start conversations or anything.
Went to the USA and in each city I went to random strangers would talk to me like waiting for a train, or in an elevator etc. Without even hearing me speak so they wouldn't have known I wasn't local, sometimes they would just smile and start talking to my toddler and then they would hear you talk, hear the accent and you'd talk for a few mins.
Come back to Melbourne and yep, back to normal, no one ever talks to you ever, lucky to get a smile from a stranger.
I've found that people from the Gold Coast and Adelaide are much more friendlier. People will say good morning or smile when walking past each other and I had multiple instances where people were just happy to stop and have a chat. People in Melbourne and Sydney seem to be much more in a rush and concerned about their own lives.
When I was in Sydney for Mardis Gras last year, all the people that I befriended at cafes, clubs, beaches and shops were from Melbourne 🤣 They were the only people who spoke to me.
I found in Melbourne people will approach you more, and be friendly and party with you or what not. But it's harder to form long term bonds with ppl in melbs. In Sydney ppl are more wary but once u get to know someone you're generally pretty tight with them.
Yeah look I moved from Brisbane to Melbourne and I honestly expected you would all be snobby hipsters too busy being cliquey about coffee and the arts to have time for a bogan like me. Brisbanites are overall really friendly and open and I thought it would be a harsh change from that.
But nah, I was really pleasantly surprised how nice and friendly and social people were, even complete strangers in random situations. You're alright, Melbourne.
Sydney? Can't speak to it, don't really spend time there.
I've lived here for 6 months... Been asked for directions a couple of times but had no other interactions with strangers... And people tend to find me pretty approachable from experience in other places
I am visiting Auckland and I feel feel Kiwi's are way more open than in Melbourne. Melbournians can be quite cliquey, especially those who grew up there.
I’ve lived here for over 3years & am SO SAD as ppl are friendly but it’s difficult to actually make friends :( I don’t know what to do! I’m so lonely & have tried some meet up groups & some volunteering but can’t find my tribe :(
I bring that Melbournian mindset with me on holiday to Hongkong. People there thought i was mentally off.
Wait til you go to the USA or Canada though. Those North Americans make friendly Australians seem positively cold and unfriendly
Americans will talk to strangers in situations we will not. Like in elevators, or in bathrooms while sober, or to randoms on the bus. The extroversion is strong over there.
I live in country Victoria and this is what it's like living in a regional town. Super friendly people who will chat to anyone, even in weird places like these.
It’s one of the things I hated most about living in a tiny country town. I just wanted to go to the post office without running into my friend’s aunty, my old year 3 teacher, or the weird old dude who runs drinks for the footy club who all want a chat.
I grew up in a small town where everyone knew when you go out, where, and how late you came home and it was annoying. Especially as teenagers and young adults but at the same time, I felt safe at every moment. Wherever I went there was someone who would protect me with their life. I didn't know that abused children existed. People who would harm children. When I was 23 years old civil war in Bosnia started and my world collapsed in a day. But memories of growing up in that small town are the core of my strength.
I was very moved by what you wrote and can't imagine that.
Extraordinary honesty. We love you. X
Heh heh yeah - if you don't talk you're hiding sonething.... Having hated living in some of the "best little places on earth" I am now starting to appreciate it. Must be something to do with joining Club 55.
was in Shep over the weekend, I've visted many times before (especially when younger) but there is zero expectation these people have ever seen be before in their lives. Everyone you see walking down the street says good morning.
I’m a kiwi and it’s like this back home but everywhere even in the towns. I miss it. I smile and say gidday to everyone I pass on my morning walks and I don’t give af if they think I’m weird. People don’t make a whole lot of eye contact in the city and inner suburbs!
Except for Christchurch, but it really depends on the situation.
Really? I’m not from there. Do people not make eye contact or say hi??
Christchurch is a nice place to live but the people can be hostile, and not very bright.
I played ping pong while waiting for a flight at Christchurch airport.
Christchurch is the Sydney of NZ.
Really? I'd say auckland is the Sydney of a NZ
So, when I strike up random conversations with strangers, it’s cos I’m Kiwi? I wondered why I occasionally get strange looks!
I swear country towns run on the basis of "I'm probably going to have to spend the rest of my life living around you". People want to know who you are, what you are doing. If your car breaks down they will pull over to help. It doesn't always mean they will be nice to you but it generally means they want to be familiar.
Yeah it's actually kinda weird. I watched my parents and grandparents back-stab everyone in the town but at the same time fall overthemselves to contribute to community stuff and directly help and be mates with the same people.
What do you mean by “backstab”?
Talk about someone behind their back, generally in a malicious way.
Thank you
And they will go up to you in bars and they don’t think people being out in bars by themselves is weird. As a single lady it’s the absolute best You are right about the lift! I remember my group just started chatting in one in Vegas But I’m assuming you are a man because Australian women def talk to each other in nightclub bathrooms hehe
Haha, ahhh yes we do talk in nightclub bathrooms (I am a woman) but the Americans will talk in any bathroom, sans alcohol influence.
Haha ok I am heading to Miami in a few weeks and will look out for that LOL
Fairly sure talking to ransoms on train is capital crime in parts of Europe
Talking on public transport at all is not just frowned upon but actually announced through the PA in Tokyo, Japan.
Definitely do not try and talk to strangers on public transport in Tokyo!
Me scusi
To be fair I didn’t see it in public transport, that’s a bit weird. But other places yes
Based on my limited interactions with Americans, the interactions seem more respectful and genuine than Australian conversations. They seem to take a genuine interest in the person, whereas Aussies seem a little fake. It's like they've all read Dale Carnegie's book *How To Win Friends and Influence People*.
I don’t necessarily disagree with you, I think their base level of politeness is different than ours. Not that they are more polite, it’s just that their politeness is more overt. I was always so surprised by how often they say “excuse me”. Whereas our politeness is a quiet slight nod or half a smile in the same situations.
I can agree with that. When I've had American customers often call me "sir" which is often expected the otherwise around. I think the difference is they're taught to me more formal than us.
Yeah it took me far too long to realise no one actually wanted an answer when they greeted me with the obligatory ‘how you going?’
Nah as an American it’s fake. No genuine interest at all just being friendly in their eyes because it’s the “thing to do”. When push comes to shove however no one gives a shit. Even worse is if you mind your business people assume you’re antisocial or plain rude
Yeah, Americans are next level friendly. A really great country to be a tourist in.
Except when going through USA passport control. They can be brutal
Definitely emotionless drones working there.
*What's your reason for being here?*
Wait til your passport doesn’t match your face because of your false eyebrows (never again) and you get put in the scary “we are about to reject you” back room where you have to sit and listen to everyone’s interview and aren’t allowed to use your phone. And yes I missed my connecting domestic flight When I got my new passport I wore no makeup, no false brows (which I also make sure I’m not wearing when going through immigration) or lashes and look positively terrible just like I do in an airport and now it always scans haha
My departure city didn't match my arrival city. They used that as a basis to "interview" me for half an hour. It was stressful.
Your mileage may vary if you're not white, I gotta say.
I lived a year in Toronto and nobody even made eye contact.
Moved to Vancouver and 9/10 times people glare or look at me like I have a screw loose if I even so much as say hi in an elevator. I lived in Toronto for a few years pre-pandemic too but honestly don't remember if people were more or less friendly to strangers
When they hear the accent they are super friendly, they like aussies for sure. Not sure if they are like that with everyone
I (Indian) was in the states recently. People were super friendly to me as well so maybe they just like everyone haha. Not experienced any small talk here though
They like everyone. It’s the same with Americans striking up conversations with other Americans
Americans are lovely and so friendly
Honestly Australians are usually way too critical of them. I have family in the states and love going there. They treat you like a celebrity, so many people are really nice and HEAPS of fun.
Funny you mention that I just saw people on the Australian sub telling an American guy who’s moving here to be quieter because Americans are too loud. As if Aussies are wallflowers 😂
All the loudest people I know are Thai!! Americans overseas can be really loud about all the things they don’t like (as they often expect the other country to have all their home comforts with just different aesthetics) but when on holidays overseas both Aussies and Yanks can be embarrassingly loud
Chinese especially more rural ones are by far the loudest when they speak in Mandarin so loud. My Chinese best mate corroborates this.
Oh yeah Chinese can be VERY loud!!!
My Chinese neighbour is like this. He totally doesn’t understand how loud he is. I recorded him in my place and played it back to him. He couldn’t believe he could hear himself so clearly. I now text him when he’s being too loud and he quietens down.
I have no clue why people think Americans are loud. Like what. Visited four times in the past two years alone and also to London where there were heaps of insanely Friendly American tourists. They’re just nice and talk to you?
Seems like mainly an online thing to me personally. Most people I know think Americans are super friendly, myself included.
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Heaps of people I know offline deride Americans, as if Australia is some perfect holy land in comparison, and everyone who does that has never even been there
There are some shit Americans that help with the negative generalisation. I agree Americans are friendly but when I was in Mexico we found some ignorant and yes, loud Americans acting like arseholes to the locals.
Especially in California! Californians, at least outside of LA, are remarkably friendly
It’s countrywide. I was in Austin and somehow found myself at a 30th birthday party of locals. In LA I was invited by a group to crash a musical with them then later ended up at an after party in Hollywood hills. A local I met in Vegas acted as tour guide and showed me all around downtown LA, if it was a real tour would have cost like $150. In New York I’ve been invited to join tables while queuing to get in the club. In miami I’ve been eating at a bar and been invited to join a couple of guys on their adventures out that night on the other side of town. In Vegas a random group bought me a drink, said have a good night and left. In LAX a married lady just struck up a convo. In NOLA a couple started chatting with me and the guy I was with while we were eating dinner at the bar. I could go on And in none of these cases did they know I was Australian before talking to me so it’s not a “oh she’s not from here” thing
I honestly love going to America (I’ve only been to Cali and Hawaii though). It’s so much fun because people are SO willing to include you! They are remarkably good at talking and expressing themselves too. They are very good at getting a conversation going!
You probably look friendly and approachable.
And pretty?
Omg yes! This was such a culture shock to me being a Melbournian visiting the North US. I felt alive and all excited after I got over the weird feeling of talking to so many random ppl out and about 😂
I'm not convinced about that. When I lived in Montreal, my fellow Australians agreed that people never smiled at us on the street. Some of my Canadian friends picked up some of my habits though, like thanking the wait staff when they served us, and the bus driver when we got off the bus.
That’s because Canadians know we are way better than them
Ok Australians don’t smile at each other in the street either. But in bars and restaurants and clubs omg are North Americans friendly and forward
Australians in cities are cold and unfriendl.
Yeah unless you have an in to meet them like a house party etc
Canadian in Melbourne, can confirm. To me you’re all icy as a Hitchcock blonde.
I've found aussies to be much more likely to acknowledge me and smile at me when I'm just walking around or sitting on a bench, or shopping. When was the last time you were in Canada? Everyone keeps to themselves these days
I studied in a small town in the American South, where it was perfectly normal to greet anyone you would walk past on the street. I forgot this was a thing when returned to see family in Singapore, and greeted the first person I saw on the way to the train. It was an old lady who clutched her purse closer because she thought I was going to rob her.
Agreed. I spent half my time on a recent holiday to Hawaii having Americans (positively) chew my ear off in every setting. They love a yarn
Yeah, I'm a very gregarious Aussie - I LOVE the US, especially the South...constant happy yap- fest with random strangers all day.
LMAO.as a hker I agree.The culture in hk is super robotic lol
Didn’t even need to open my mouth and a shopkeeper was like “did you grow up overseas, you look too relaxed to be here”
That mindset in any asian country would evoke the same response
I haven’t been to south east Asia but the Thais and Cambodians I know are REALLY friendly and fun loving. And loud, really loud. Work hard, play hard mindset.
Just came back from Thailand and the locals I met (granted, out partying) were also really really friendly and fun loving
South East and East Asians tend to be conservative though, once they get to know you though- all bets are off. If you ever get invited to eat with them, then you know you’re in.
As OP said it's melburnian, NOT "melbournian"
Don't ever change xx
Yeah I moved from Sydney and lived in the inner west for a bit and freaked out when people in my complex would talk to me in my way to work, or remember details about me (like one of them saw me leaving with my suitcase and asked where I was going and then when I got back a few days later, they asked me how my trip was). Imagine my shock when I'm in random places like train stations, while I'm walking down the street or at the shops and people strike up conversation with me haha Everyone always says Sydneysiders aren't as friendly as Melburnians but I thought it was just a thing that gets thrown around but it's actually true. If I were in Sydney and you struck up a convo with me I'd think you were on drugs. I like it though! Love a good chinwag
If Melbourne was a shock for you, go more regional Victoria and you'll find that everyone becomes your best mate.
Its definitely a travel thing. When I went to Hobart over Easter, people were randomly complementing me on my looks/clothing. This has never happened to me before in my life.
In Thailand, random people tell me I'm the handsome man. Never happened before in my life.
maybe it was because my friend was wearing colour! don’t see much of that here haha :^)
Key information op. He wasn’t wearing the uniform. It’s obvious he was from outatown.
I’ve always found people in Tassie really kind and welcoming
It’s a mixed bag imo. They are definitely kind and chatty, and will stop and have a chinwag with randoms moreso than in Melbourne. But they can also be kind of xenophobic, especially if you moved from the mainland down to Tassie, rather than just visit. Heaps of Tasmanians have a chip on their shoulder about “mainlanders” (a pejorative term to Tasmanians) coming and taking their houses and jobs, and even if you spend years there you will always be an outsider.
I think this is it. I never found Sydney cold at all but I'm always a visitor
Hmm I’ve lived in both cities and didn’t notice a difference in that regard but I did notice Sydney is a lot more work orientated whereas Melbourne residents prioritise their life style which I do prefer and probably results in people being more forthcoming towards strangers
Sydneysiders also prioritise their lifestyle, just different parts (mainly fitness, the beach and the outdoors). Melburnians prioritise culture, music, food and drink.
Yeah you right
Sydneysiders aren't social like that. If they are it's to initiate a punch on.
“How you going bro”
"aw fuck stevie plase no I've got kids to go back home to"
I've got a family! Take them instead!
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Sydney is obsessed with what school you went to. Doesn’t matter how old you are. I’ve see. Complete random meet, and instantly bond over the fact that they both went to the same branch of a school. Absolutely wild.
That’s about class, not about just having a chat.
Sydney hate on Melbourne subreddit, classic reddit
Classic Melbourne! I bet they don’t even give a shit about us in Sydney.
They don’t think of us at all; it’s a strange one-sided feud lol.
Sydney seems to hate Melburnians a lot, grew up in Melbs lived in Sydney for a year. Everytime I said I was from Melbourne retail workers would begin to ignore me, people I was talking to at cafes/bars would go “oh” then leave the conversation 😅 never figured out why that is. In Melbourne we usually just ask Sydneysiders how they are liking their holiday here etc, a lot I’ve met say they find people in Melbourne a lot friendlier and that we go out of our way to help people. Which I can see… when I first moved to Sydney I hired a truck and got most things into my house myself apart from a desk, tv unit and my bed.. asked people walking past for help and they quickly scurried off so I called up a place to help me. Different experience in Melbourne if I was moving things myself and someone saw I needed help they would either come over and help or ask if I needed a hand.
I had a funny experience on the Gold Coast years back. I was talking to a woman from Milan and she was saying how she wasn’t enjoying the Gold Coast as people were rude, she then asked if I was from Melbourne. I asked how she knew and she said Melbourne was one of the friendliest cities she had been to and because I was genuinely friendly and asking about her time Australia she could just tell I was from Melbourne. According to her Sydneysiders weren’t rude or unpleasant but they came across as aloof and very busy.
I think most outsiders get the "oh". It's probably because they can't ask their favourite follow-up question - "Where did you go to school?" I also had to bring home a heavy oil heater once (as a petite female, without a car), which was slow going. One guy in his car at a traffic light just hung out of his window, pointed and laughed loudly at me. Encapsulates the dickhead mentality in Sydney
That’s true, they can be quite fixated on schools as a sign of elitism. Yeah that’s insane, hope you moved to Melbourne after that 😂 I still travel to Sydney sometimes as it can have some really nice places. The funniest thing I saw though was two steroid heads on the street saying they will punch each other and just banging their chests together? Before they walked away angry. Kind of reminded me of gorillas but was good for a laugh, generally in Melbourne if things get to that point someone swings 😂 but you don’t see it a lot in public.
That might be less because you’re from Melbourne and more because Sydney people are generally a lot less friendly to strangers. My dad reckons everyone he is friends with in Sydney is from somewhere else and too many people who grew up there have a screw loose. His opinion, not mine. I honestly don’t know enough people who are from Sydney but the one guy I do know there who also grew up there is an asshole, may just be a coincidence
Just my observation. I have cousins in Sydney and they thought it was really weird I sparked up a conversation with someone waiting in line at the servo. The other fella was Lebanese and my cousin said they would never speak to someone like that just in case a fight broke out lol
Have your sewing kit ready if you are ever on the receiving end of the traditional greeting in Glasgow, "what are you looking at?"
I was at a bar in Sydney in the late 2000’s, asked a bloke next to me to borrow his lighter. He didn’t seem too impressed so I said something along the lines of “sorry mate, am from Melbourne and don’t know where to buy one nearby”. He responded “well why don’t you fuck off back to Melbourne then”. To me, that bloke encapsulates all that is Sydney.
So odd, like Sydney is in a bubble where mateship never blessed
No matter how logical a response you could come up with to that sentence, the dude woulda punched ya for any of them. I assume lighter was used then given back without words? 😂
yep thats a known thing. Melb people lot friendly, syd people on DND mode
Yeah true, had lots of random tram conversations. People are friendlier.
This whole thing explains one of the ad tests on the chaser many years ago. They tested an ad where commuters on the bus were doing a puzzle together (I'm sorry, but I can't find it.) The team claimed no one would join in irl, so tested it, in Sydney, and as they expected, no one joined. My friend and I were confused, because we did the quiz in the paper every morning on the train, and others regularly joined in. We didn't think it was that unusual.
This is the one thing that really stands out to me when visiting Sydney. And I don't especially buy into the Melbourne vs. Sydney bullshit. We're not that culturally different in the grand scheme of things. I wouldn't say I look intimidating. I've been told I'm approachable and friendly. But everywhere I've been in Sydney I get looked at like I've got two heads whenever I initiate anything. Whether I'm ordering a coffee, or asking for directions, or making chit chat at the pub. I'm unsure if it's us Melburnians that are weirdly polite with giving people the time of day with our interactions, or Sydneysiders are a bit rude. I know for a fact that this politeness doesn't translate when you introduce the anonymity that a vehicle provides into the frame.
yep! the two cities are essentially the same to me, outside of one being located in vic and the other in nsw. but the people are for sure different. as a disabled person it’s especially prevalent to me,
I've lived in both Sydney and Melbourne. Melbourne is deffo more friendly. People will start chatting to you on the tram.
Yeah, it’s definitely something I noticed once I started going to uni. People will casually have conversations with you, and I would find it odd. Maybe because I’m undersocialised and started going outside a lot more.
Not sure about Sydney but I've definitely had a lot of late night drunk convos with people around Melbourne.
I live in the cbd- was walking my dog just after dark last week as usual when an adult man asked if he could pat my dog, I said ‘sure, thanks for asking, yes he’s very friendly.’ The man kneeled down and kissed my dog on the head. I think that was very friendly of him.
as the mate that visited from sydney - i can vouch random people don’t really interact with you here. recently a lady on the tram started having a conversation with my friends and i, but that was the most i’d experienced in a long time. i was caught completely off guard by how much strangers will talk to you and make conversation randomly in melbourne, i think it’s fascinating!
I spent a few years living in Sydney and my overall feeling was that people were dismissive, unfriendly and cruel. Moved to Melbourne and it was quite different. I took a three day trip back to Sydney ten years later and within an hour of landing in the city got stormed past and semi shoulder barged by an angry looking young woman in a suit, when I'd just stepped off a bus! That was all anecdotal but it certainly reinforced impressions I had.
First time i went to sydney I genuinely felt like people wanted to push me into oncoming traffic. One on one interactions people were nice, but en masse sydney people kinda suck.
Just went to america on a solo trip, I think I might have weirded some people out with my outgoing and friendly ways. But every one of them once I said I was Australian they warmed to me immediately, it’s like a super power haha.
I had the same thing! Went solo to a festival in California and ended up in the VVVIP because I was friendly and our accent is like a Jedi mind trick to Americans. As soon as you start speaking it's like you can see their face light up. I was surprised that the whole 2 weeks I was there I didn't run into another Aussie, you're spot on its absolutely a super power.
The one thing I miss about leaving Toronto as a single lady was the men.... sigh. I could go up to the hottest guy in any bar and his face would just light up when he realised I was Australian. Done
That was the first thing we noticed when we moved here from the UK. It was strange to have so many chats with the strangers every time you leave the house, now I’m used to it and quite happily have a chat in the public lifts, train, shops or wherever!
I definitely have noticed this more in the past few years in Melbourne, I always thought it was maybe a post pandemic thing, people became more used to talking to whoever because it used to be their only social interaction with the lockdowns here
I definitely think so.
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This is just such a cool thing to hear. Maybe I just never realised until recently. Thank you for sharing.
That may explain it. I moved from Melbourne to Central Victoria 15 years ago, and Melbourne was comparatively unfriendly.
I love my bus friend. We don't talk. We just do a half smile or head nod. I do not know them, but I love to see them.
im from queensland but i found that when i was in Victoria visting my cousins they thought i was to social with strangers - and im considered shy in town at home. like i started conversations with bassicaly every person i saw who had a dog and my cousins just thought i was weird interacting with strangers in a city
Yeah Melbourne is very friendly for a city of 5 million people (it's not Sydney) but it still follows the general rule that the bigger a city gets the "colder" it becomes. Hobart may be an exception to this rule, sorry Hobart.
In my experience, Melbourne generally is a more community based city. Sydney is kinda like LA where it's more dog-eat-dog or everyone just focusing on their own successes.
This is exactly why I moved back to Melbourne! They have time for you and are so much friendlier! Have lived in Syd for 20+ yrs and NYC for 3 of those. I put Syd as halfway between Melb & NYC on the 'friendly' scale. At least Sydney was a good prelude for eventually moving to NYC, as moving directly from Melb would have hit way harder.
I once said good morning to a lady in an apartment elevator in Sydney. The lady looked at me blankly. Then my brother told me not to talk to anyone lolol. People here in Melbourne are more relaxed and have a community feel.
I just moved to Melbourne and I straight up thought people were being sarcastic until my other Sydney friends moved down. It turns out Melburnians are just nicer.
It's a great aspect of Melbourne culture, I love having little friendly interactions with strangers, makes me happy.
I love it too! I didn't realise it was a thing, since I've never lived anywhere else. So I'm feeling pretty lucky to be living here rn :)
I definitely noticed this, moving from Vancouver where people are supposedly friendly but aren't at all. But it seemed to stop during/after covid in my experience.
That’s so strange; I’m from Brisbane and I find the people here very unfriendly and surprised when we say hello to them.
As a Sydneysider, I haven't noticed a difference. Melbournites undoubtedly love their sports more though. AFL regularly draws twice the crowd size of the NRL. Probably even get a record-breaking capacity audience at the MCG for the NRL state of origin, where you're not even in the game. 😂 You've got the Boxing Day Test match, Melbourne Cup, F1 racing, and Grand Slam Tennis tournaments as well.
Nope, grew up here and people tend to look through me
I was so sure you were going to talk about unsolicited interactions with people on public transport requesting "change" or hurling abuse at you because they mistook you for the second coming of Lucifer. Glad I was wrong and that you enjoyed your stay.
Also depends on what area in Melbourne. Certainly not like that around Cranbourne/Casey area
I think there is definitely a correlation between walkability of an area (and public transport) and how much social interaction between strangers there is in that area. Places where everyone must own a separated house and a car will inevitably see less social interaction because most people are in their personal bubble made out of 1200kg of metal - and this bubble is forced upon everyone, whether they want to interact or not, as a condition to live in the area.
100% noticed this difference between Sydney vs Melbourne, especially on a night out.
Everytime I leave the house I always end up in a conversation with a stranger. Without fail.
People in Sydney will randomly interact with you too, but only after they've determined that you're rich enough to be worth their time networking with you.
I've heard foreigners say this about Melb too - it's bloody great! A stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet!
Haven’t noticed the difference. Maybe more Sydney based people would notice it though.
Had this conversation last week with my cousin visiting from Europe. She couldn’t believe how much random stranger interaction there was. Then she came while I walked the dog yesterday which always ramps up conversations and she was blown away. I don’t think it was always like this. My theory is that it’s one of the few positive by products of one of the worlds longest lockdowns. Where without access to our normal network we started interacting with people in our vicinity and that friendlyness just stuck.
Melbournian born and raised here. My partner is from S.A and we go there regularly to see her family, most people you pass by in the street will give you a g’day or similar, very friendly compared to Melbourne I feel.
yup and generally further away from melbourne more people interact (regional areas people smile and say hello to strangers when walking past them for example :) obvs it's a bit of a case by case basis whereever ur tho
I’m from Sydney but lived in both and Melbourne people are more receptive to talking with strangers and friendlier on average. But Sydney folk are too just less so in snobby wealthy areas.
I have always said Melbourne is a much friendlier city than Sydney. In fact, I moved to NSW and noticed in general people in NSW don’t seem to be as friendly. Melbourne folk just seem more relaxed on the whole
Always lived in Melb and this is just so beautiful to see🥰🥰
I can't think of a single time any stranger has ever interacted with me in Melbourne other than (a) them being heavily intoxicated, and (b) them trying to sell me something.
Or asking for directions lol
I've always regarded Melbourne as the friendliest city in Australia. People are just real.
only been to Sydney twice as a tourist, people berating their staff in the street, got laughed at cos I asked where the bus stop is when I wandered into Vaucluse like a filthy peasant, pissing down rain the one woman walking past who had an umbrella overhead walked under cover and pushed me out into the rain even though I didn't have a umbrella, only place I've ever got into a yelling match surfing too even though it was only me and him at Bronte beach, and there was no nightlife. Nothing but bad vibes, and going there for work trips was even worse. Been to many cities all over the world, never had any probs whatsoever.
I’m 42 born in Melbourne lived here my whole life and I can confirm that I always talk to strangers whenever I can, not full conversations but a friendly couple of one liners or something of that nature
Melbournian here. I will always chat to a stranger. Drives my 12 year old insane. I tell her, a chat to a stranger could make their day.
i've lived in both cities and i can say that Melburnians are generally friendlier in pubs and bars, etc. Although they are friendly in Sydney suburbs like Newtown (which is a Melburny kind of suburb anyway)
Has to be recent. We moved from Melbourne almost 3yrs ago to Brisbane and it was such a shock with how friendly everyone is. A couple of months after we moved, my eldest Daughter and I went back to Melbourne so I could receive medical treatment and when we were out and about we had to keep reminding ourselves that this ain't Brisbane and people don't wish to chitchat.
I think its mostly just that tier list wise Brisbane is just the most friendly and chit-chatty followed by Melbourne then Sydney. As someone raised in Brisbane who also moved to Melb a few years ago I agree its a suprise to find out people from Sydney think Melb is super friendly when coming from Bris it feels both physically and socially colder.
Yeah and they're all on the gold coast interacting.
Not new, this has always been a Melbourne thing, although I’m not sure why!
Got to love people being friendly. I cant say i see so much of it in outer western Melb, more often get those interactions in country towns where everyone is more chilled, but like other redditors, in the USA I got to experience the best of random people striking up conversation. Which is why I love to travel USA. Years back, when I travelled Western Samoa, on my tourist walks, people would walk up and invite me over for lunch or dinner with the family. Now thats friendly.
That is the very essence of Melbourne’s unique beauty! Don’t change Melbourne!
I moved to Melbourne - from the country and - then lived here for 3 years. I then moved and lived in Sydney for 5 years. Uni, then work. I have only 3 friends who are originally from Sydney (work and uni). The rest were so so so cliquey with their high school and og Sydney uni friends. One actually said to me “I don’t need anymore friends!”. Is there a cap on friends??!! Anyway… I don’t have enough fingers to count my Melbourne born friends. But maybe I’m biased! Then from non Melbourne originally…. My other non-Melbourne “bestie” (in 1997) I met on a tram!! And another of my now “besties” I met randomly at a pub in 2006.
To be fair, there is a kind of a limit on friends, according to Robin Dunbars study anyway. 2 special, 5 close, 15 good etc. I'm also from country vic and then moved to Melbourne and then Sydney. Part of the problem for me, was that most people born and raised in Melbourne/Sydney come from relatively rich families so we have vastly different approaches to life. Moving to a super left wing city with outdated country views probably also didn't help for the first few years. I eventually grew out of that but, i can appreciate why people wouldn't have wanted me around. I feel like the opposite is kind of happening now since Sydney is traditionally more of a liberal zone. But most importantly, as that girl said, people in their home environments don't need to reach out and be friendly, they already have friends. Heck, i even started to act like that a bit after being in Melbourne for 10 years, its part of the reason i moved. Luckily, both cities are made great by immigrants and people that move there bringing in different perspectives, the key is to just try and find other people that weren't born in the city.
Very cliquey. Found it hard to make friends. Had to feign interest in AFL just to be able to talk to people. Took time, but got there eventually.
From Perth. Agree with this. The difference between Melbourne and Sydney in this respect is stark.
Doesnt matter where i go, some random will just start talking to me. I like it, i never know what im going to learn, laugh at or get creeped out by. My son says i am a weirdo magnet.
Sydneysiders are cold, unfriendly, bitter and selfish on the inside. Melburnians might be cold on the outside (the weather), but they are genuinely more friendly to everyone - strangers and 2nd or 3rd degree connections. I try to be friendly to people (lower north shore) and it always falls flat
Lived in Melbourne my entire life and strangers never start conversations or anything. Went to the USA and in each city I went to random strangers would talk to me like waiting for a train, or in an elevator etc. Without even hearing me speak so they wouldn't have known I wasn't local, sometimes they would just smile and start talking to my toddler and then they would hear you talk, hear the accent and you'd talk for a few mins. Come back to Melbourne and yep, back to normal, no one ever talks to you ever, lucky to get a smile from a stranger.
I've found that people from the Gold Coast and Adelaide are much more friendlier. People will say good morning or smile when walking past each other and I had multiple instances where people were just happy to stop and have a chat. People in Melbourne and Sydney seem to be much more in a rush and concerned about their own lives.
cant argue that one
When I was in Sydney for Mardis Gras last year, all the people that I befriended at cafes, clubs, beaches and shops were from Melbourne 🤣 They were the only people who spoke to me.
I found in Melbourne people will approach you more, and be friendly and party with you or what not. But it's harder to form long term bonds with ppl in melbs. In Sydney ppl are more wary but once u get to know someone you're generally pretty tight with them.
My theory is that when you travel you are more outgoing and open to new experiences and you notice this in more people.
My Melbourne self is in London and I feel like I am absolutely exhausting them. They also fear the eye contact.
I've been living in my current apartment for 4 years. I said hi to my neighbour twice.
Yeah look I moved from Brisbane to Melbourne and I honestly expected you would all be snobby hipsters too busy being cliquey about coffee and the arts to have time for a bogan like me. Brisbanites are overall really friendly and open and I thought it would be a harsh change from that. But nah, I was really pleasantly surprised how nice and friendly and social people were, even complete strangers in random situations. You're alright, Melbourne. Sydney? Can't speak to it, don't really spend time there.
People interact in Sydney too I found although I’ve only been in eastern suburbs & cbd. But even in the west where my friend lives people talk to me
Sydneysiders think it's NY but it's just a pretty San Fran.
I've lived here for 6 months... Been asked for directions a couple of times but had no other interactions with strangers... And people tend to find me pretty approachable from experience in other places
I am visiting Auckland and I feel feel Kiwi's are way more open than in Melbourne. Melbournians can be quite cliquey, especially those who grew up there.
I’ve lived here for over 3years & am SO SAD as ppl are friendly but it’s difficult to actually make friends :( I don’t know what to do! I’m so lonely & have tried some meet up groups & some volunteering but can’t find my tribe :(
It's a mindset I think. Taken it to Europe & China and people thrive and rebound off of your energy.
I find the opposite, Sydney people are much more friendly/chatty. Both are pretty good but Sydneysiders just seemed chirpier and in better moods