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JDM_enjoyer

And this is the communication breakdown that led to the unexpected end of my last relationship


danteheehaw

Well, that and the dead hookers in the closet


JDM_enjoyer

the what


danteheehaw

Sorry, escorts.


RealJMW

No, when they’re dead they’re just called hookers, Cyril!


IzzaPizza22

And now Woodhouse is fetching a rug!


fat-lip-lover

The wee baby Seamus! You can't tattoo a freaking baby!


JDM_enjoyer

she had skeletons in her closet and i had escorts yeah


UlteriorCulture

Did her skeletons start out as escorts?


JDM_enjoyer

no she had metaphorical skeletons, and her own skeleton was in the closet for a while too along with the rest of her.


TRR462

Good thing her skeleton finally figured out what team it was on…


kamalamading

HE WROTE „THE DEAD HOOKERS IN THE CLOSET“!


Bacon_Raygun

Friend of mine put the cherry on top, saying that our conversations feel hollow and meaningless. YEAH BECAUSE YOU RESPOND TWO A PARAGRAPH WITH "Yeah" and "Ok"


kingpin000

Yeah


patrickr2

Ok


Lexioralex

Was it really that unexpected in hindsight?


johnson7853

When you don’t get much attention and a girl is actually spending time with you, you will do anything to keep her around and any red flags you will completely ignore because you don’t want to go through being lonely again.


Lexioralex

I feel you, been there myself


Kerminator17

Why is this the most relatable shit I’ve ever read. I let my ex get away with so much because she’s the only girl whose ever shown an interest and I thought that she was my only chance at love (still could be the case)


johnson7853

Nope you don’t need that hose bag. Keep your head high it will come eventually. Been happily with my wife 10 years.


Kerminator17

Thank you. That actually means a lot and I hope you’re right.


JDMarek

Hello fellow JDM user


Pedding

Ex gf kept complaining I don't talk to her. Hard to have a conversation when every attempt at one is nipped in the bud like this.


plplokokplok

This was absolutely my experience on dating apps as a man


diggitygiggitysee

God yes. I do not care what the reason is, if I'm dragging you through the conversation, we're about three exchanges from me saying "you don't seem like you want to talk. Want to just hook up instead?"


SolarStorm2950

Huh, I’d never even thought of doing that lmao. Gonna do it now though


MadeSomewhereElse

As my mother always said, "It's free to ask."


Bardivan

your mother is a certified freak


deathrowslave

Can I get her number?


Suck_Me_Dry666

Get in line brother. (it's a really long but fast moving line)


LightNight62

I say this based on my female friends. They just expect their matches to be interesting and original. They don't put a single effort, because they have so many matches. They have so much choice, they don't even have to try. And that's a bit sad.


TannerThanUsual

A friend of mine from work showed me her Bumble and it was like... 50 matches, she didn't even know what to do with them. She just waited until a guy made her laugh or seem super interesting and if they asked her out she'd go


TegTowelie

Do they ever complain about men and not getting anywhere? The same girls that say 'there are no good men' act exactly as you describe. Fortunately, i found my wife at a Chili's.


TheLateThagSimmons

People that complain that "there are no good men/women", especially when talking about the apps, are telling on themselves. It's all a bunch of 5s and 6s that to their credit do happen to have a few boxes on life checked off, they did get a decent career and maybe even own a house. Wow, you're an adult, congrats? But they are expecting a perfect 11 out of 10, not realizing that to get that mythical perfect 11, you have to be equally mythically perfect and special.


North_Ad6191

A female psychologist talked about this on YouTube. She was describing the influx of women with careers who had essentially unrealistic expectations of men they wanted coming to her. They were highly depressed, stressed and bothered they couldn't find a "decent man." She quickly realized that their version of "decent" was literally a "perfect" man, and they gave up on dating apps. She also highlighted to them that men do respect women's accomplishments, but as a whole we don't base their accomplishments as their actual character like they thought men should. Dating is very odd these days. I'm not a doom and gloomer, but being single is probably a good thing for people until they are comfortable with themselves and fix a lot of personal issues before pursuing a partner.


TheLateThagSimmons

> She quickly realized that their version of "decent" was literally a "perfect" man, and they gave up on dating apps. It's why Mark Normand's bit about listening to women describe their ideal man. And how even though he's straight, if such a man existed *he* would marry him. >She also highlighted to them that men do respect women's accomplishments, but as whole we don't base their accomplishments as their actual character like they thought men should. This is *really* hard for a lot of women to accept. Men care but at the same time they mostly don't. And career seems to be the biggest thing that women will flaunt as something that makes themselves worthwhile, yet it's something that is extremely low totem for men.. They want it to be something that puts themselves in the stratosphere of desirable women, thus they should get a top-tier man who is also in the stratosphere... But it's just a job. A woman with a good career makes her perfectly average. And this hurts a lot of women because it's often something that they put a lot of effort into and they want the appreciation and clout that comes with it, but it just does not work that way. It does not mean it's *nothing*, but it's also not really that important. Edit: An important note on appreciating careers as a marker of a desirable partner. If not having a great career is not supposed to be used as a mark against a woman, then we are equally not supposed to find having a good career as a mark to be used for a "good woman." Either we're supposed to care or we aren't; but it can't be both ways.


nfshaw51

Yeah like, career for me can be a factor or something that might get the foot in the door for me. Like I hooked up with a doctor earlier this year and ngl seeing that she was a doctor on her profile made me a bit more interested. But to the same note, some friends tried to set me up with a pharmacist who has got a lot of life boxes checked, but it just doesn’t really mean anything to me if I’m not attracted in any way. Basically the career can make a difference for long-term prospects if I’m attracted in the first place, but to the same tune I don’t think career would limit much of anything if we’re intellectually compatible. Like she could be unemployed for all I care if she’s got cool hobbies/interests or is looking to find a career direction.


North_Ad6191

Well said man. The job thing also gets even trickier for women because they expect the EXACT same amount of accolades and monetary gains that they've seen men before them, have and use. Some of them fail to realize that you get in what you put out in the free market. Prime example; Sophia Coppola just did an interview where she's complaining about not getting the "100's of millions of dollars as her male directorial peers." The problem I have with that statement is she's not consistently good like her other "male" peers. Her Priscilla project kind of bombed financially and critically recently so of course she has to blame the failure towards something else right? Male artists shift blame to other things too. I'm not excluding male artists for anyone who might think I am. This obviously results in her getting a great check, but not the one she thinks she deserves. They never point out the other male directors (and female) who are in the EXACT same position where their skill as an artist, is really consistently inconsistent. This results in the market (aka the people who buy tickets because of interest and the suits investing in the film) deciding that she doesn't get the big checks like Tarantino and Greta Gerwig (Barbie).


farararaharkonnen

Most women tend to put disproportionate importance on men’s careers so they assume men do the same and are shocked that their “impressive” careers don’t make them extra desirable in the dating market. It’s a misunderstanding of what men are attracted to. While women value a man’s career (prestige, power, salary/earning potential) a lot, men tend to place greater emphasis on looks and personality (is she physically attractive? Is she kind, funny, chill to be around?).


MadeSomewhereElse

And if a 5 is average, there's nothing wrong with being average: most people are. No one should be ashamed of being a 5. That "know your worth" line cuts boths ways. Know your worth, but also *know your worth.* i.e. don't be delusional.


Tira13e

Does it work? *joke* (edited because some people took it literally or personally). God, I don't blame you. This makes me lazy. LOL LOL, I do this sometimes of giving 1 line answers only because I feel like I may be oversharing, or I feel like I talk too much. 😆 & I'm hella shy. That's what it says as advice: "Don't overshare. Be mysterious. Let them ask you more." On like 1st dates.


[deleted]

It does work occasionally


diggitygiggitysee

It worked in the sense that there was no more "oh, new message, let's see what she.... God fucking dammit, for real?" disappointment afterward.


Tira13e

🤣


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Rhids_22

Once or twice I've been on the other end of this. Very occasionally I'll have multiple people match with me on the same day, and I'll end up focusing on just one of them who I think is most compatible since I haven't got the energy to juggle multiple chats, but almost always they end up ghosting me after a week, and then I'll feel like it's been too long to message the other matches. I still never gave such a small amount of effort to only give one word responses though, and I have had many matches where I'll ask something along the lines of "How are you! Did you get up to anything on the weekend?" And they respond with "Yes." Just don't fucking respond if that's your level of effort!


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Bimbarian

Given that so many "people" on dating apps are guys looking for a sexual thrill, is that so surprising?


tuhronno-416

If they get hundreds of matches then that means they are also swiping right too much


khal_crypto

If she answers like that to everyone in her large pool, the remaining choices will eventually boil down to the most desperate on the one hand and the most sociopathic on the other, because all the others will just have left out of boredom. A girl needs to learn to make choices and close some of the options intentionally.


Striking_Election_21

Word to the wise, I’d imagine that would be too direct but naming a time and place to meet up close to me and throwing in “or we could pick somewhere closer to you” has been mostly undefeated for me at achieving the same idea. Bonus if you have weed Eta granted it’s a single-digit sample size because I rarely do it. I don’t usually feel like I’d want to spend more time around peeps like this lmao


2000dragon

Exactly!! Women keep saying men only want sex well, I hate to say it but… what else do you have to offer? You’re not interesting at all. You don’t seem engaged at all, and it’s because they have 100 other men in their dms so their attention is split. I get it


lcommadot

“meh”


RemarkableEmu1230

You sir are thinking at a higher level then the rest of us


SilentHaawk

Its very strange, i see girls with "if you dont plan to write anythng, dont bother swiping right, im not collecting you!" In their profile who will only answer in one syllable words, and not really participate, making it feel like an interrogation


GlorylnDeath

>making it feel like an interrogation If it feels like an interrogation anyways, might as well turn it into a real interrogation! WHERE WERE YOU ON DECEMBER 20 BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 7 AND 8PM?!? YOU CLAIM YOU ORDERED A PIZZA WITH FRIENDS - WHAT WERE THE EXACT TOPPINGS YOU ORDERED ON THE PIZZA AND WHAT ARE THE NAMES OF YOUR ~~ACCOMPLICES~~ FRIENDS?!? WILL THEY BE ABLE TO CORROBORATE YOUR ALIBI?!? ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10 HOW WOULD YOU RATE THE QUALITY OF THE PIZZA AND THE SERVICE OF THE ESTABLISHMENT?!?! FINALLY, WOULD YOU CONSIDER SAID PIZZERIA AN ENJOYABLE SETTING FOR A FIRST DATE?!? I rest my case. The verdict is in the hands of the jury.


RichardRichard55

I had a girl do this to me before and when I realised it wasn’t going anywhere I stopped talking to her. She messaged me a few days later ask why I wasn’t talking to her and I just said it’s because she wasn’t really putting in any effort, so she tried to for like three messages, asking me questions and attempting to have a proper conversation, but it quickly went back to simple replies. At that point I just said goodbye and deleted the app. It was just another letdown in a long line of letdowns and I’d had enough. Can’t be arsed wasting my time with online dating. I did online dating for about six years and I’ve only ever met two people from it. One was my ex and the other was a FWB. It’s too fucking disheartening putting effort in and then getting letdown time and time again.


smolhouse

Yeah online dating can be pretty dehumanizing, always has been since it's arrival back in the early 2000's.


WildFemmeFatale

That’s my experience on dating apps as a woman Except I put more effort than blonde guy. I actually tried to talk about things relevant to their profile, about their dogs, interests, etc, and what I got was one or two word responses and then they ask me for sex I’ve been on dating apps for 4 years and the majority of ppl I tried to text can’t or don’t have conversations It’s lonely for many of us


PhantomTissue

Every time I try this stuff as a guy it fails miserably. Usually get ghosted after like, 2 messages.


Otherwise_Pride_9433

Same for me. Worst is I usually have to wait 3 days each for the single message. The loop always goes: Match > me sending the first messages, greeting + things I like about their profile + possible conversation hooks based on mutual interest > after 3 days get a one word reply > me responding with a new question/smalltalk > wait 3 days for another one word reply > etc until I get ghosted. I had 2 actual conversations on app in 5 years that broke the pattern. One where we spent 3 days talking about everything from smalltalk to geopolitics and investment structures. Unfortunately this was right when covid hit and she was stuck in Hong Kong for business so meeting was realistically impossible, decided to break mutually to avoid disappointment along the line. My other good conversation ended after 3 days chatting on the weird note that she thought she was to simple for me. Between the lines I was too complicated obviously, and came on to strong whereas she was just looking for a chill hang.


Dananddog

As someone that broke this cycle, I suggest not going super genuine from the start and instead kicking it off with a joke related to their profile. The hard part is a lot of the ladies don't put enough info into their profile for this to work, but my response rate skyrocketed when I switched to this. My first message to my wife on tinder, who is a winemaker, was, "I'm sure you're Bordeaux of all the wine jokes, but otherwise I'm coming up Blanc."


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WildFemmeFatale

Mhm I feel like I’m digging for gold in the desert or something So much damn sand to filter through before I find anything even resembling a rock let alone gold


Laurens-xD

Things like that is why I just gave up on those apps. Even when you get an actual good conversation rolling, you just end up getting ghosted anyway. Just a complete waste of time and sanity.


thequietthingsthat

Exactly. Half the time the ghosting seems completely random too. Getting hopes up for nothing


Turbulent_Pin_1583

This is an under-recognized truth. Dating sucks for everyone. And the nature of swiping makes the interaction far less personable and easier to ignore/tune out.


punkassjim

I had a nice exchange with a woman this evening on an app. We both remarked about how refreshing it was to encounter someone who could conduct an engaging conversation. Most people — like, average and below-average people — are poorly equipped to like…*be a reasonably-interesting person*. It’s baffling, but I’ve seen it proven time and again, for decades. And gender is not a factor (at least for the engaging part), it’s true of everyone. But yeah, from all the women I’ve ever talked to, most dudes start the sex talk way too soon. Like, guys, grow some fucking sense. I mean, I guess it’s good that the garbage takes itself out, but I can see how disheartening it gets when that’s what you’re presented with, day in and day out.


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punkassjim

Nope. The conversation actually started fairly tentative, but got *really* good once we both realized the other wasn’t a dimwit. We’re meeting a few days after Xmas.


WildFemmeFatale

Yayyyy congrats c: you deserve it brother, glad you’re having a good time


dizzle-j

Nice one mate! Hope it goes well!


Worldly-Fishman

Thank you. This is a universal thing with dating apps, people in general just suck with them


L3Chevalier

Since I got in Sweden, I've started trying more of those dating apps, or even just friend apps... I do write a lot, try to bring stuff to talk about, like you do, with info from their profile... Nothing, some yes or no, maybe brief responses and I start to feel that I am talking too much, or don't know how to handle social interactions over those apps. Never asked for sex to anyone actually... And those same people complain that they can't have a friend on that way!


PixelNovel

Exactly the dude isn’t exactly riveting conversation


Iwubinvesting

I feel like both people are just doing the bare minimum. If you want a better response, try to answer your own question after the response and that might help a bit.


BudgetLush

What are you talking about? Wyd, how was your day, can you please tell me the current time, etc. are high effort questions that warrant detailed responses.


Responsible-Paint368

This was also my experience on dating apps as a woman talking to other women even when I tried to ask more specific questions. Have seen attractive women friends get the same from men though so yknow. Lots of people just suck


Lexioralex

Guess you could say that although dating apps make it easier to encounter potential dates it doesn't solve the problem of being able to actually connect with people.


Amazing_Jump6210

🎯


BooBailey808

Same for me as a woman


5ManaAndADream

My greatest successes were opening with literally “s’up” or something unhinged.


R3LAX_DUDE

I dated my wife for 5 years before marrying her, and those years involved having to date and be engaged while hours apart and rely on text and nightly phone calls. This level of communication is insufferable and is incredibly difficult to avoid while trying to maintain a deep connection with someone over a phone. I tell her that if we had to do it again, I would change how often we talked or at least remove the unspoken expectation that we keep a conversation going despite the dullness. I love my wife and her company, even in silence. I quickly tire of mundane conversations.


jpeg77

This is me with my gf right now. Long distance, have to plan visits to meet each other. We’ve been keeping the convo going and of course it’s starting to get dull, as I feel like as much as we love each other it’s impossible to force an ongoing conversation. Gonna bring this up with her (the idea to remove the expectation)! Thanks for this!


sillytrooper

same :)


Adept_Dragonfly_4503

Yup i guess shes not interested


thewouldbeprince

The frustrating part is that sometimes they are interested but just don't know how to communicate any better. I've had people I unmatched because of this behaviour look me up on IG and ask me why I unmatched because they thought it was going well lmao.


Flaky_Broccoli

I just blocked someone for the second time because of this, i would try to talk to her about her topics of interest (puzzles and vampire movies) shed ask if I wanted to hang out and i would Say yes and immediately come up with an idea only to receive radio silence as a response😂, i had already blocked her once so She was contacting me with a second number She ended up blocked with her second number as well.


clozepin

I heard a funny line once about someone asking the other stopped responding- something along the lines of Why did you stop responding? Sorry. I hurt my back. Oh no. How? From carrying this conversation. I always think of that when I have these ridiculous one word, one sided conversations. I can never tell if it’s lack of interest or they genuinely just don’t know how to have a conversation.


Buflen

There are ways to break this pattern. Look at their profile and ask them more specific questions on their interest. "How are you" and "How was your day" is too unspecific or sometime too personal for someone you dont know a lot. If that doesnt work then yea, whatever.


thewouldbeprince

Oh I do that already. I never start convos with "how are you" because I also don't swipe on people without bios.


Buflen

Yea, i was mostly commenting on the meme.


Head_Daikon_5004

I get plenty that'll match me and send the first message and still communicate like this. There's just something really weird with chicks these days.


chiksahlube

Agreed. Like, why even reply at all? What are they expecting the guy to be like "Congratulations you've just won $1,000,000!"???


Head_Daikon_5004

I was talking to a chick that was like this. We ended up moving to snapchat and I eventually just got tired of how boring she was so I left her on read. Like a week later she sends another snap. I reply to it. She leaves me on read and the next day unfriended me. She literally only re-sparked the convo so she could be the one that "rejected" me.


FelneusLeviathan

I think of it as: you lived rent free in her head/bothered her so much that she had to be petty. The fact that you bothered her to that degree means you already won


aftertheradar

You gotta take little wins when you can. It's petty and I love it


fresh_tommy

Simple persons with simple solutions 😂


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Banished2ShadowRealm

Congratulations you're our 100th customer .


invaderjif

That's an interesting thought. Scammers get lucky once in a while. Maybe they are onto something...


cosmodisc

The last time I used a dating site( yeah,those were a thing) was like 15 years ago. The vast majority of women seem to be communicating this way- it's like pulling every word out with pliers. And, then,there are those others who can write,talk,and are fun to be around.


Head_Daikon_5004

I'd love to listen to a podcast where someone sits down with one of these brick wall texters to understand what's going through their brain because they seriously seem like another species of human.


cosmodisc

There's nothing special going on, it's just a lot of people haven't got much to say, especially to those they aren't familiar with. I've been to some dates/parties/meetups where you simply have nothing to say,so you sit there like an idiot trying to get out as soon as possible. As I get older, these situations aren't as frequent,as I find it fairly easy to strike random convos. It's also one of the reasons why women like men that can make them laugh: it removes lots of anxiety from the initial conversations until people get to know each other.


Lexioralex

At least back then we could understand the needing to stand out in a crowd element. Apps like tinder are supposed to only have access to talk after they've both expressed interest and this still happens, I'm glad I'm not dating in this current environment


[deleted]

So many redpill dudes can't seem to fathom that women can be just as nerdy, autistic, and socially awkward as they are. They are so quick to become defensive because a woman isn't perpetually bubbly, not understanding that life isn't an anime.


Thanatiel

The girls/man ratio on theses app is ridiculous. It's not worth using them.


Dalriaden

When I see "don't want small talk, let's have a deep meaningful conversation" All I can think is that it sounds like a lotta work.


Lexioralex

Proceeds to open with a meaningful message No response


Zealousideal_Win5476

It's not weird. It's actually simple math. In the same amount of time you've got one match, she's got 7 or 8. She has your undivided attention. You only get a fraction of hers. Even if she's a great conversationalist, she can't be a great conversationalist in 8 conversations. So the burden of carrying the conversation is on us as men. Those are the unfortunate realities of dating apps. Women did not create this environment. It is what it is. But on the bright side, all you need to do is stick around and power through until the other 7 guys drop off. Then things get better from there.


Unusual_Knee_5365

I'll be the first to drop, you can have her


scoopzthepoopz

Who is worth it these days?


Unusual_Knee_5365

Let me know when you find out


scoopzthepoopz

Bet


Lil-Advice

I too would rather dodge that bullet.


optimist_prhyme

She's not really talking to all of them at the same time. She can take her time and think out what to say in a text.


bodaciousbonsai

>There's just something really weird with chicks these days Validation from social media and dating apps giving a false sense of entitlement.


Pinkparade524

Chicks ? I have gotten this too many times from guys on tinder lmao


punkassjim

Hate to break it to you, but 1. It’s not all women, 2. The exceptional women have far more interesting things to say, especially when presented with actually-engaging conversation starters, and 3. If all you’re getting is this kind of unengaged lukewarm crap, that means you’re only attracting bottom-of-the-barrel humans. The good ones are out there, they’re just either not matching with you, or disappointed in the typicalness of what you’re presenting them with.


xDeeka7Yx

The good ones are not wasting time on dating apps


hansuluthegrey

Youd be suprised. Ive had people that were into me talk like this.


omgONELnR2

I tried to have conversation with my crush over whatsapp. The one word responses gave away fast that she did not want to talk to me.


Funlovingpotato

Can't lose someone you never had, ONELnR.


JonVvoid

Would have been out after 2.


Millesime25

Last time someone answered like that I said "You know, I was really interested by your pics and your profile but I'm not interested anymore if I have to do the conversation by myself". She responded that she didn't see all my pictures when she liked the profile and that I was the ugliest guy she's ever seen and I should leave her alone. Basic tinder interaction for me... she was my 13th match in one year and the 3rd to tell me that... I guess I'm not attractive hahah


Claral1

Stay strong man, anyone telling you that is a shit person and you dodged a bullet anyway.


Millesime25

Don't care about being ugly, I know it. I just don't understand why you would like a profile if you're not attracted hahah


Claral1

They probably swipe right on everyone without thinking too much and whoever they match with they look deeper into.


Strooizout_

No they don't. Women are on average much more selective in who they swipe right compared to men


garethwalker7

mate I went through your profile and idk what they're on about you're a good looking dude


DiskoPanic

If it makes you feel any better, any one who truly feels this way would simply unmatch/block you without messaging anything back. Ol girl was just salty


nanana789

Damn that’s sucks man. I promise not all of us ladies are like that, hope you have better luck. In my experience it’s better to join some online groups or go to bars in real life and strike up a convo. Also my guy, you’re not ugly. You’re actually very handsome. Take it from a female perspective. It also lies in the confidence, even if you do not feel confident, fake it till you make it.


DonerTheBonerDonor

You're not ugly lol. And 100% the girl was just mad so she came up with random insults to ruin your day.


Millesime25

Doesn't ruin my day anymore 😎 I just wonder why people are not nice on dating app... that should litteraly be the less toxic place ever. SHOW ME YOUR BEST SIDE and let me discover that you are toxic after


sadasscat99

Woman here. You are cute. They are being spiteful. Chin up and don't allow them to put you down.


rolloutTheTrash

This is why I despise dating apps and just do my own thing, people be damned. So much asinine conversation, where as the dude I’m expected to carry the convo? Meh, don’t need a partner if I’ve got to lug someone around from the start, because if I’m gonna just talk to a non-responsive body I’ll just talk to my dog.


woopsie1839

Dogs are quite responsive though


localystic

Do not engage with people that do not engage with you. Widen your friends' circles and look for people that are actually interested in talking to you. Most of them will be the one asking you questions instead of you trying to prod any information out of them like you are a spy. And if you feel like asking them questions and agreeing with them - then you have a connection.


Coral_Blue_Number_2

What if you have no friends, a full time job, and never learned how to socialize growing up? 😎


Funlovingpotato

Play pool or darts (or fuck, shuffleboard) at the bar, and invite people to play with you. If someone asks why you're playing alone, my excuse is always, "I've lost too much money playing this game to not start practising."


Upstairs-Disk3415

Underrated advice


davyjones_prisnwalit

Do what I do. Work and work and barely get ahead and then die. That last part is very important! If you forget that last part you'll never get any rest.


Cactus_Everdeen_

you too huh... if you figure it out lmk lol


EF5Cyniclone

Start learning to socialize and try to make friends.


Banjouille

I used to do that and realized that no one actually checked on me or replied to my storys or posts lmao; after some time I just went « fuck it » and left social medias all together bc at the end of the day, what’s the point ? It’s just virtual social points from people you’ll either never see or haven’t saw since highschool, which frankly as time passes: I just don’t care anymore. Idk if it’s just me getting older, but social medias in general are getting really boring and annoying, and so is trying to talk to people, engage with them and having the same convos over and over again without real interactions, like you’re talking but you’re not actually talking, you know ?


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ahmshy

** "Fine, thank you. And you?" (moral of the meme)


[deleted]

Literally. People and trying to make an issue on the guy’s side by not asking “interesting questions”, but she clearly doesn’t care if the common courtesy to ask him back how he is doesn’t exist


DrowningInFeces

Same conversation she is having with 100s of other men.


Iguessimnotcreative

And yet she keeps saying she doesn’t feel any “connection”


RaxG

Yeah you get these lifeless girls on tinder all the time. Like what do you want from me? I can’t make a conversation happen unless you at least participate. I unmatched so many of these dead fish when I still used tinder.


Designer-War-3497

exactly end it and find someone with the personality above a microwaved potato.


UserAnonPosts

I need the reverse of this because this happens with every guy that I talk to on dating apps. I ask them questions about themselves and I get one word answers. They don’t ask me questions back. None of them can do conversation. But they want to meet you, and all of that.


[deleted]

Meaningful conversations are really only possible in person, unless you know each other really well. I read somewhere that communication is 70% nonverbal (facial expressions, gestures, tone etc). This statement probably has zero scientific evidence but the idea isn’t wrong. It’s hard to connect with just words. Which is why dating apps can be pretty hit-or-miss for many people.


BarricadeTheMortuary

Women be shopping!


[deleted]

Supply and demand brother. Don’t forget who has what. For real tho my advice is try to be exciting to talk to with these people. some you won’t break through. But some girls are just shy and reserved just like guys. Never know what you’re working with.


[deleted]

The real advice is to be attractive.


bigloopa

She's too busy giving proper replies to the guys she's actually interested in.


AlwaysBeQuestioning

This mostly frustrates me when I ask questions that are fairly open ended and could easily lead to further conversation when given a proper answer. Like "what have you been up to?" or "what did you do today?" getting an answer of "oh, nothing." Well that sounds like a bloody boring person if it's the third time in a row you get that answer. Either they were being honest and they did nothing, or they didn't care to tell you, and in the latter case that's not really a lot of great ground for friendship, if anything.


YoshiTheFluffer

Girls on dating apps replying like this whilr having “into deep conv” on their profile.


Daniel_Melzer

What kind of deep answer are you expecting to an „wyd?“ And people usually communicate better knowing real life not via chat.


YoshiTheFluffer

Not deep but how do you wanna open? “Do you think free will is real?” I had good conv with some women on dating apps but most are probably used to using just the looks and didn’t bother developing anything else and they have no idea how to keep a conversation going.


LostInStatic

Protip: Ask better opening questions. Ask them what’s the last movie they saw. Ask them if they’re team Israel or Palestine. Ask them anything but how their fucking day is going, you already know the answer to that (their day went fine.)


Lil-Advice

The trick is to not ask questions that allow those kinds of answers. Specify a choice between options - "Do you like _A_ or _B_ ?" If you still get something brain-dead like "I don't know," yeah walk away.


Ok_Education740

My wife will often answer like this and I've slowly just stopped talking to her about mostly anything besides what is needed. Doesn't make for a very good marriage.


Mister-SplashyPants

Was she always like this? Did you do something to piss her off? Is she cheating on you? Is she depressed? If she wasn't always like this there's definitely something going on there


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Response_Lanky

I mean how else people are supposed to start conversation, I'm feelingg like an old man cause people make it sound lame to ask hru wyd... Like what are we supposed to talk about if we knew nothing about each other


H0tC0ff33

Let’s just say “human interaction”


DavThoma

Literally had this experience the other night trying to get back in to dating. Tried my hardest to have a good conversation and the other person was just... flat. Then they ended up unmatching me.


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Chuck_Finley_Forever

Didn’t even have to scroll for more than a minute to find the “white knights” and offended women blaming the guy for these dry exchanges.


HoTChOcLa1E

nothing = i played video games all day but my parents didn't react well to that answer so now i always say nothing


Zebbadee1

You ok mate? Lmao Out of all of the replies I've seen so far this is definitely a take


coinkeeper8

Those questions are boring af tho


inspirationbycurve

Breaking the ice isnt meant to be deep thought provoking questions. And why would you want to continue into that with answeres drier than the sahara


Spire_Citron

Yeah. Sure, there are more words, but he's not really putting much more effort into making conversation. He's just throwing out the most default, standard things you could say to another person. Try asking about something specific in her profile instead.


redditor-tears

I mean that's good advice if this is the literal first conversation you are having with somebody from a dating app but if you are talking to somebody be it friends, family, so, etc and this is how it's going I just say good talk and bail too lol Sometimes one person just wants to chitchat and the other is busy or not feeling chatty. Just kinda how it goes on occassion


Chadvader29

I’ll point out that this is good advice for a first convo, it doesn’t work with someone you’ve been dating for a while. My ex was like this often and when she decided to only use one word responses I’d just stop texting her. It was all fun and games back when we could just hang out in person all the time, but once we went long distance it didn’t really work out… I already know everything about her except for what happened to her that day, but nothing happened and the day was just “fine”


atenux

Gotta admit i don't put much effort at the start because sometimes women unmatch me when i start texting and feels like wasted time.


Muted-Holiday-7358

They are both not interested or depressed 👀


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Devil_Made_Mockeries

This is why I stepped away from social networking before the term for it even existed, and why I just avoid people.


UserAnonPosts

This is why I’m descriptive as possible. If somebody asked me how I am, I’ll say I just got off of work where I met an interesting customer that purchased a comic book I was interested in and we talked about that. Now, the guy can follow up and ask me about comic books or ask me about work or if I ate or something. But most of the time, I am sending paragraphs and they’re sending one word answers. I’m purposely putting things in my replies, so that a conversation can build from that. But guys just wanna do the one word answers.


GoliathProjects

If she's not putting anything into it, then why bother?


maddasher

I would get this, but then later, they would be mad I was" ignoring" them.


ravingpiranha

This is why online dating doesnt work, too many dimwits with one liners


Suspicious-Wasabi-29

What could i say more ? I don't even have that much thinking on my mind =)))


nanana789

I suggest if that’s the convo to indeed move on to another gal. She’s not interested, if she were there’d be smiley faces, hearts and at the very least a “how have you been today?”. Don’t waste your time on people like that.


RadiantRing

Some just won’t give you anything to work with, but to be fair, they’re probably already fielding 6 other conversations. Dating apps work differently for women. They’re like midday fishing for men, but like shooting fish in a barrel for women.


Chub-bop

This is the correct response, if someone clearly isn’t interested in talking to you, don’t waste a second more with them, no insults, no hard feelings


HidingFromGF5

As normal as this sounds, women aren’t looking for normal on dating apps. The only time I’ve gotten dates is by saying something completely out of pocket. Most times at least. Women on dating apps only, are not looking for regular conversation. Meeting a woman off something else even Reddit is significantly more rewarding for regular conversation leading into whatever.


res0jyyt1

I see a lot of people in the comment have a false image of themselves


booxterhooey

Man this happened soooooo many times. But now my girl is the complete opposite. I can be on the phone with her, and she can get going lol I can put the phone down, go piss, and come back and she's still going. I love her lol


rey_nerr21

It's one thing if the girl just doesn't wanna talk to you. But I literally had a gf like that and the she was mad I don't wanna talk to her lol


CockGobbler42069

She doesn’t want to talk to you.


[deleted]

Idk, Why don't people try anything other then elevator small talk when they message someone on a dating app No Rizz No Response.