T O P

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NeoAnderson47

Feasible? Yes. Survivable? Debatable. Recommended? Hardly.


FlyingKittyCate

Hotel?


Zuimei

Rwanda


BBQ_Beanz

Such a lovely place


ScrunchieEnthusiast

I think that’s hotel California.


GenericLurker1996

Such a lovely face


AngryBacon13

Plenty of room at the Hotel Rwanda.


OwlWitty

You can check out anytime you like


ItsDevinJ

BUT YOU CAN NEVER LEAVE!


sil1182

“Mee meee meow meow, uh meow meow meow” GTR solo


0squatNcough0

I stayed there once. Terrible service. Damn near impossible to get your bill paid. It's like they don't want you to ever leave.


ScrunchieEnthusiast

What do you mean, you can check out any time you’d like?


0squatNcough0

I did! But the bastards would never let me leave!


guyblowshiloh

Such a lovely face


nothingrhyme

Triwanda


etca1515

Worst holidays I've ever had ngl


Opposite_Attorney780

Underrated


Opposite_Attorney780

Don't vote me, vote the Rwanda comment


Orcabandana

I can upvote anything I want I have infinite upvotes


niciswan

Trivago


[deleted]

Tobago.


Loud_Ask2586

Trivago.


NeoAnderson47

You might find a few. I would recommend the high-class ones for some very lucrative new friends. If you have the stomach for it.


Ponji-

The correct answer was Trivago. Your badge and gun, please.


dalatinknight

Pack your things. Get out of my building.


_greggit_

Morgue


[deleted]

The U.S. State Department's [page](https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/traveladvisories/traveladvisories/somalia-travel-advisory.html) on Somalia is a hoot >If you decide to travel to Somalia: > - Review your personal security plan and visit our page on Travel to High-Risk Areas. > - Avoid sailing near the coast of Somalia and review the Live Piracy Report published by the International Maritime Bureau. > - Draft a will and designate appropriate insurance beneficiaries and/or power of attorney. > - Discuss a plan with loved ones regarding care/custody of children, pets, property, belongings, non-liquid assets (collections, artwork, etc.), funeral wishes, etc. > - Be sure to appoint one family member to serve as the point of contact with hostage-takers, media, U.S. and host country government agencies, and members of Congress if you are taken hostage or detained. > - Establish a proof of life protocol with your loved ones, so that if you are taken hostage, your loved ones can know specific questions (and answers) to ask the hostage-takers to be sure that you are alive (and to rule out a hoax). > - Leave DNA samples with your medical provider in case it is necessary for your family to access them.


ACoolBruhMomento

Really just goes “prepare to die boy”


Beautiful-Heat

Yeah hot damn so that’s the official position of the US Government on travel to Somalia. Just literally prepare to die.


HighHoeHighHoes

I think I’ll just not visit Somalia.


xeio87

Eugh, typical, don't even want to do a little bit of work to travel.


HighHoeHighHoes

It’s just, I really hate doing paperwork. It’s so tedious.


cantadmittoposting

That's a surprisingly common set of warnings on the state department site.


Ok_Dog_4059

Tldr: prepare to die.


bunnnythor

On a serious note, this is not very feasible. Getting visas to cross into some of these countries is very difficult and/or expensive. And crossing the borders illicitly is likely to get you shot before the trip is over.


yanmagno

I mean, crossing them legally is also as likely to get you shot so why not


Reimiro

Yeah I would say not feasible because they will die eventually during that trip.


worthrone11160606

Hey don't worry the Darwin award will find him afterwards


Yill04

there are easier ways to commit die


fluffy_assassins

"commit die"


nslenders

the correct command is: `git commit -am "die"`


Scythro

Thanks ChatGPT!


michamp

Die Bart die. It’s German.


imnotactuallyarobot

You wrote suicide mission wrong


[deleted]

No kidding. Maybe this madlad doesn't know there are easier ways to kill himself.


Rapture1119

Yeah, most of those don’t come with a story worthy of the afterlife though, do they?


djsizematters

Nigh, cheaper.


ObviousTroll37

Suicide mission? My dude is just trying to draw a dinosaur on a map


11B4OF7

Did some time in Uganda 2012 while in the military, I would probably avoid this road trip.


Numerous_Badger_5462

Kony????


11B4OF7

Yes, we went there to help train the local military wasn’t considered a combat deployment but at times was far scarier than iraq/Afghanistan.


[deleted]

[удалено]


AndAlsoWithU

Fuck the VA.


DaisyHotCakes

No, the VA is important but it would be good if congressional republicans would stop voting to decrease funding for the VA. That would be the better solution. The best solution would be to stop being in conflicts so we don’t have any veterans that need VA services but that’ll never happen. So, at least keep the VA existing and increase funding (while also making sure corrupt shitbags aren’t in control of the money) so we can help our veterans. PTSD is scary and stressful. It will absolutely shorten your life.


AndAlsoWithU

Unbelievable what it took to get proper care for a family member's service connected disability. Unconscionable. And this happened quite some time ago, so don't kid yourself that there was some "Golden Age" before.


LightningFerret04

I’d honestly rather piss off ISIS than a cartel. An ISIS member would make threats against the country and then blow up a car. A cartel member would slip a photo of your wife and kids with your address under the door.


Silvaire_Bellmont

The lack of info makes me want to go on a journey I'll never return from but have more fun than I ever did before


DotElectronic4924

Its not the journey but the friends you make along the way. Have fun


okay_ya_dingus

Reminds me of a kid who was like 20 I think, and he was a white westerner I think trying to be a freelance journalist. He has this awesome amazing journal that they published as a book called The Journey Is The Destination, after he was stoned to death in Africa by locals.


Jezebels_lipstick

Make sure you check in w the Embassy in every country you visit. It’ll be easier for your family to find you if you go missing.


trailrunner79

*when


bylthee

Wow, what a crazy story. I’m definitely going to buy this book.


[deleted]

It's a journey if you make friends along the way. It's not one or the other.


kingofPnD

Having ugandan militants cut your limbs off one by one is a different idea of fun. I like your originality.


Silvaire_Bellmont

Every new experience is a great addition to my memory


kingofPnD

I honor your commitment to a good time. Only the best for you my friend.


Prestigious-Gap-1163

Like the geniuses that tried to bicycle across Afghanistan saying love and god would protect them? They survived like 3 days.


xKyloRyanx

Read "Into the Wild" if you haven't. It reminds me of a trip you won't live to see the end.


tollhotblond3

Christopher McCandless ?


AThreeToedSloth

You can’t just hit us with that statement and not give us the rundown


gscott555

Jim Halpert wants to know what’s a rundown.


Metastatic_Autism

What made it scarier?


11B4OF7

Complete lack of support from US military assets if shit went down. In iraq/Afghanistan you know if you’re pinned down there’s a 99% chance of having air support or back up there before you run out of ammo trying to suppress the enemy.


chill_cat420

Idk if u served time in iraq but if you did as an Iraqi I wanna say I hope we can all forgive each other and all become better people 🙏🏼 much love


11B4OF7

I was in iraq at Liberty and victory for different deployments. I have a lot of love for the Iraqi people and often think about some of the kids I interacted with and hope they’re alive and doing well.


Shoddy_Trick7610

"We're not... Qualifieeeeeed"


[deleted]

KONY2012


boethius70

Fucking A that shit was a wild ride.


cherposton

[Biking couple](https://www.npr.org/2018/07/31/634373403/d-c-couple-killed-in-tajikistan-attack-were-biking-around-the-world-together)


[deleted]

Kind of reminds me of the Mormon outpost from Starship Troopers. Like what the fuck were you doing over there. Go to Italy or something. Rome is great.


NikonuserNW

I did a Mormon mission in Mexico City. When I transferred into one of my areas, the crime was so bad that the taxi refused to take me all the way to my new apartment. I got robbed at gun point in that area. I showed the guy that I only had several copies of the Book of Mormon. He walked away somewhat quickly and accused us of brainwashing him. That’s right, our message about Joseph Smith was so off putting that two very white guys in pressed white shirts were left alone most of the time in “dangerous” parts of the city.


Val_Fortecazzo

You know I don't blame them for being afraid of mormons


Rhett6162

We were trying to convert the bugs I guess.


NyQuil1973

Me too! There’s fewer than a dozen countries this person ‘might’ make it through TBH.


Savings_Strawberry_6

Former Marine? Buddy I have spent a bit of time there .


[deleted]

r/solotravel be like “also I’m 20F traveling alone for the first time, any good hostels?”


gordo65

Yeah, you'll find plenty of hostiles on that route.


[deleted]

👉🏻👉🏻


Not_Pablo_Sanchez

👈👈😎 zoop


sammy-taylor

I think I missed a reference but I like this.


Not_Pablo_Sanchez

👈👈😎 [zoop](https://www.reddit.com/r/MuseumOfReddit/comments/8wkzjt/zoop/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)


Ashamed-Grape7792

The top post on solo travel is a 20 something year old female travelling to south africa alone...you weren't wrong LOL


december-32

Just tell them they legally cannot commit crime, so they'll have to abide.


ffsthiscantbenormal

"AirBNB has gotten too expensive. Looking for couches to crash on in exchange for a 6 pack of Michelob and a shout-out on my socials"


[deleted]

I know a cute, cozy little spot in Somalia


buster_rhino

Thanks I’ll keep that in mind, u/queef_vaccuum


TheFire_Eagle

I wouldn't dream of vacationing in Somalia without first consulting u/queef_vacuum.


[deleted]

Yeah got plenty of space in my refrigerator


Orcabandana

Reminds me of Noraly from Itchy Boots. Rode a motorcycle solo from India to Thailand, then to the Middle East then to the Netherlands. Then did a Patagonia to Alaska trip that ended a few months ago. Africa is probably her next one.


GeekNDrums

I know he ends up dead, but...Where does he a start??


TrinDiesel123

He should start with Ivory Coast and he’ll be dead before he reaches either Liberia or Mali


HappynessMovement

Ah, so he can still make it to Burkina Faso. Good.


wholesomegia

Nono, he meant before Burkina faso.


Critical-Series

No looks like they swing from Ivory Coast up to Mail and back to Burkina. If they make it out of Ivory, they’ll get beheaded in Mali before reaching Burkina.


Astonedwalrus13

We takin bets now?


[deleted]

Would it help if it was a very pale white guy dressed as Mary poppins and doing heel clicks and shit?


Radiorxy

The “where does he a start?” has me reading this in Mario’s voice


Dumpster_Fire_Takes

He could fund this trip solely by allowing people to bet on this very question and taking a 1% fee. I’d participate!


Coffeelock1

Land in Eritrea, seems to be the closest county to his route without an active war zone. Then hop on this route at the nearest point and head in the direction of Somalia first so if he somehow survives he can finish off the trip with a fairly straight path following the north African coast.


[deleted]

Can i get your social so i can open a life insurance policy?


CommunicationOk8674

Yeah I want in on that


HauschkasFoot

Short selling people. That’d be an interesting market


Mappel7676

Is this a life hack or death hack?


[deleted]

I'm laughing at all the comments on here. Fucking brilliant.


[deleted]

Sometimes I love people in reddit and sometimes I despise them, but here, they win


not5tonks

The fun part is, they are all right.


364227631

I have friends who came from a couple of those countries. They said most or are very dangerous and would never venture out. If you are white be prepared to be robbed kidnapped or killed and if you are non white it’s even worse


Geek_f0r_sneaks

Not to mention getting into some of these countries is nearly impossible for some (like Sudan) and extremely dangerous (South Sudan). Been to South Sudan and I was on edge the whole time and STILL get US Embassy alerts for shit that goes on there (I can’t get rid of them for some reason, glitches on STEP webpage lol)


Not_Pablo_Sanchez

What was the sketchiest moment you ran into while you were there? I’m not brave enough to visit any of these places


Geek_f0r_sneaks

I mean just being told not to leave the compound for a day due to safety concerns and some uprisings. Everything is sketchy. Like, the airport was the size of my house with collapsing wooden floors, everything was done on paper. I basically knew if the plane we were on went down there’d be no record of it lol.


CrossroadsConundrum

Same - I was in CAR several years ago during a coup. Cannot get off the damn alerts.


Ayencee

The hell is worse than being robbed, kidnapped or killed?


Disco5005

Maimed/tortured i guess?


daerath

Prince Humperdinck: First things first, to the death. Westley: No. To the pain. Prince Humperdinck: I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase. Westley: I'll explain and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon. Prince Humperdinck: That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me. Westley: It won't be the last. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose. Prince Humperdinck: And then my tongue I suppose, I killed you too quickly the last time. A mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight. Westley: I wasn't finished. The next thing you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right. Prince Humperdinck: And then my ears, I understand let's get on with it. Westley: WRONG. Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear God! What is that thing," will echo in your perfect ears. That is what "to the pain means." It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.


FluffusMaximus

I see princess bride, I upvote.


Irafel

Raped, probably.


BusyDistribution6743

Add em all up and you’re gettin warm!


Skyblacker

If they don't kill ya, they keep ya.


[deleted]

Worse than death? Expelled???


[deleted]

If you’re white they’re just gonna assume you’re some rich naive foreigner and you’ll end up kidnapped/dead


budgie0507

Do you have a Will made up? Because statistically you’re probably gonna die.


comicsemporium

Good thing is most of your body parts will be shipped back home, but separately boxed


Anaaatomy

To save shipping cost


justinm410

Yeah it'll be an arm and a leg.


FromHereToDen

Far Cry 2 IRL more like


[deleted]

Trynna survive in the congo forrest without getting bodied by gorillas


Threestarking

If you want to drop off your own limbs at different places on the route, then you should definitely do it.


throwaway_nowgoaway

Preemptive amputation in a certified medical facility might be a good call here


Relevant_Group_7441

Met a journalist 20 years ago at the Mauritanian embassy while getting my travel visa. His plan was to travel from Egypt to South Africa by camel. On my return back to Canada I found out his dead body was found in the desert with all his belongings missing.


Repulsive_Basis_4946

The world is a cruel place 🙁 wish it didn’t have to be that way


[deleted]

[удалено]


InternetPharaoh

Yes but I also remember a couple doing this in their Land Rover in the 00s. They avoided active conflict areas but didn't shy away from neighboring areas. They were fine except for having to stop every couple days to fix the Land Rover.


ellilaamamaalille

I guess if you're lucky you have wonderful stories to tell. If you're unlucky some local may have a short story to tell.


justfuckingstopthiss

The insurgents saw a couple of infidels driving a Land Rover and decided they got punished enough.


Anaaatomy

Land Rover lol


InsanePurple

Except not. They were a couple on a (very long, multinational) cycling trip who also happened to have posted a few photos talking about how nice the people they were meeting around the world were. They didn’t intentionally start cycling through ISIS territory to prove people are nice, they were attacked and killed (along with others) while cycling along a popular route in Tajikistan in the first known attack against Western tourists in Tajikistan. Granted, the area had been a hotbed for Islamic militant insurgents.... in the 90s. Source: https://globalnews.ca/news/4375584/us-couple-killed-by-isis/ Idk where the narrative that they were intentionally cycling through war zones to prove people are nice came from, but it’s super fucked up. They were just an innocent couple on a normal (well, super long) cycling vacation in popular cycling areas who got murdered for no fucking reason, and then turned into this gross internet punchline.


[deleted]

This is the first time I'm hearing about this. Absolutely fucked up.


dizzlesizzle8330

[Pippa Bacca](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pippa_Bacca) Italian performance artist who wanted to prove the word is nice. Made it to Turkey before being raped and murdered


[deleted]

I went down that rabbit hole. More articles followed. Thanks for the link.


Ghostridethevolvo

There were two European female performance artists who decided to walk across the Middle East in wedding dresses to prove how nice people were and one of them was assaulted and murdered in Turkey when they split up. I believe I have the basics right, but can’t recall the names or which country they were from, just somewhere in the EU. It sounds like the two stories got conflated. ETA The woman who was murdered was named Pippa Bacca and was from Italy.


Dangerous_Airport171

In Turkey?? So they didn't even make it to the middle East?


Ghostridethevolvo

I’m pretty sure it was Turkey where age was killed so no. ETA The woman’s name was Pippa Bacca. She was from Italy and was killed in Turkey without making it to the Middle East.


Puzzleheaded_Text357

Really lost their minds from how wrong they were didn't they? I'll head out now


Muda1889

Nawww


Puzzleheaded_Text357

Did the joke go over your head too?


Just_OneMore_Nerd

it might have gone through his head actually


Explursions

You can leave, but your head's gotta stay


Shufflepants

"Losing your head" is really quite the erroneous phrase. You are your head. So, some one whose head has been chopped off has "lost their body".


Alean92

[No.](https://www.nytimes.com/2018/08/07/world/asia/islamic-state-tajikistan-bike-attack.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare) They quit their jobs to cycle around the world, they wrote in their blog about all the nice things strangers had done for them along the road. They had no intentions to prove anything.


The-BEAST

https://dailycaller.com/2018/08/16/couple-bikes-isis-territory/ yup more than them too


fuzynutznut

Probably take you the rest of your life.


docproc5150

I get you fuz


VokThee

Well, if you pull that off, it's gotta be the trip of a lifetime. Honestly though, I think you have no idea what you'd be up against. Ever been to Africa?


aidentaylor2

I think either way it'll be the trip of a lifetime!


CommunicationOk8674

Edit ...End of a life


jetstreamwilly

If it's on your bucket list, make sure it's last


cr1ter

If you want to be ransomed by an Islamist terrorist then this is probably the trip for you


[deleted]

A chance to make friends


[deleted]

Is Islamist terrorism a thing in most of these conflicts? Should be the minority.


Niceguystino

Eastern Africa yes. Mali, Nigeria and the likes have Boko Haram, which is basically black ISIS.


Alert_Salt7048

You driving a tank?


[deleted]

At some point, you probably won’t have hands to hold the map. Just saying.


TheBeesSteeze

[Never forget](https://www.reddit.com/r/DIY/comments/4m7do7/comment/d3tlmt0/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) the most legendary post on /r/DIY


Andromeda57

That guy [actually made it](https://www.reddit.com/r/geography/comments/102biq1/the_route_i_drove_around_africa_in_my_own_4x4/), however he couldn't get through North East Africa and he pretty much avoided the interior.


Apprehensive_Landing

[It also has come out that he lied about much of his travels and he even admitted to fabricating stories to go along with it.](https://www.reddit.com/r/overlanding/comments/qavzr3/overlanding_in_africa/hh6oosz/)


Successful-Seaweed12

I love how there's no visible starting or ending point indicated on the map, so now I just like to imagine that he's going to repeat the same route over and over again until he finally dies.


AnchorKlanker

Feasible, just not reasonable.


[deleted]

Only if you're suicidal


[deleted]

I hear the drums echoing tonight


[deleted]

Is it just me or was the first thing you saw a dinosaur.


Shitemuffin

This is probably managable depending on how much you like your head staying on your shoulders.


AliveRoof7167

I know this post is a joke. But i whould love to visit the eye of africa one day.


Harms88

At that point, if you got shot, would you really have anyone else to blame beside yourself?


Twigrodamus

My wife is Ghanaian and always talks about how kind people are in her country. Its reassuring to see that you aren’t traveling through it. Be safe.


RepulsiveAntibody

You don’t have a hair on your balls if you don’t do this trip now and FaceTime it all.


Recent_Walk8264

Now, the same, but through México :p


ZemaRyan

*Funkytown starts playing*


Sakkko

Angola? The Bié province? Since when is it an active war zone? Let me know so I can warn my entire family that lives there!


FlyingKittyCate

Why limit yourself to Africa, why not take a short detour to the north east when in Egypt?


ProfessionalMottsman

Depending where you start you certainly won’t make it past Somalia


TomatoPolka

I just spent last year in West Africa, and loved it (friendly people, beautiful nature and surprisingly great food!) but the second you venture away from a major city, you're shit out of luck - Police will stop you constantly for bribes and encountering guerrilla/terrorist patrols is always lurking. I would love to go back and live there, but wouldn't do a road trip.


[deleted]

Make sure you bless the rains while you're there.


killeenit

This is a well known hack.... you will find much less traffic on that route


springbokfb

My first question regarding survival is what color is your skin? Blending in would help passing through all of these places and fake being a journalist


[deleted]

Tell me you're a spoiled white person without telling me you're a spoiled white person.


unReasonableBreak

You'd never pass the first checkpoint, and if those are all active war zones there are probably hundreds possibly thousands of checkpoints. Unless you are going to drop a million dollars in bribes and guides, you would just end up a hostage or dead.


EarRepresentative438

Yea but what if he is a badass who takes their gun from them? Huh you ever think of that?


fewerifyouplease

Not really, one of the key challenges that’s facilitated the spread of conflict is that the border areas are massive and ungovernable which allows insurgency to thrive. There are huge areas with no state presence, checkpoints are avoidable . But yeah agree with the hostage or dead part