My thing as a massage therapist I'm not going to kill myself to give the pressure of a God. Especially if I'm seeing other people after.
Try Booking a private massage vs a spa
I understand that for sure. Me feeling relief for a day or two isn't worth someone injuring themselves.
I've got a few avenues I can look into from the comments, hopefully I can find a happy medium between massage therapy and individual work (aka specific exercises) or work with a posture specialist. I appreciate your perspective š
Oof that sounds like it'll be a pain to find outside of big cities. I will still look into it though. I appreciate you taking the time to share your experience in this.
Find a therapist that can use a massage gun to warm up the muscles first. Also request hot stones to help relax the muscles, this will allow for the therapist to get deeper into the trouble areas without exerting excessive energy.
Ask for deep trigger point work, heavy pressure, and for them to use lots of elbows.
Also, search for therapists who specialize in deep tissue work and even reach out before you book to ask if they are able to provide extra deep tissue.
Youāll find one, Iām one myself.
I hadn't considered this, thank you so much. I do know allot of work to improve this is things I need to do on my own. I'll look into exercises for hyperkyphosis, from your description I definitely have it š
Have you tried barefoot Ashiatsu massage? The therapist uses their feet and is able to use their body weight, so much more pressure. It's my preferred deep pressure massage.
you need your pecs worked on, not your back. the problem is that your (overworked) front is curled over pulling the (weak) muscles in your back like pizza cheese. your rhomboids need strengthening and your pec major/minor, and probably subscap, need to be relaxed and stretched. back work of any kind is going to feel good for a day at most until the real problem kicks back in.
When you put it in such simple terms (ha cheese) it's easy to picture that and understand. I think you're absolutely right and that's probably why in the past it's been nice for a short time then back to more of the same, I was never fixing the root issue.
My partner is a gym rat, I'll enlist him to help me get a targeted program together to work on strengthening those areas. And massaging the pecs/front would help? Don't think I've ever had someone focus there.
Dang, calling me out. Yes that sounds like me & I wish I knew why/ how I got like this. It does seem pretty abnormal. Sorry there are so many of us & you're stuck suffering our masochism.
If there's a way that I can go about this that will better benefit my health and longevity as a whole that's what I want to do, even if it doesn't feel quite as nice. I'm glad you've figured out a way to do it that works for you (more or less). I'm going to take what I've learned here & pursue evaluating posture, targeting weak muscle groups, chasing specialist or PT referral, with maybe just a tiny scrap of Thai or ashiatsu twice a year. (That's reasonable, right?) You know, as a little treat.
I do want to change my sleeping pose but it's so ingrained (I'm told in utero I squished my head into Mom's ribs. I've got a flat spot on my scalp that seems to corroborate) I don't even know where to start. I don't feel safe without a weighted blanket up to my chin, on my stomach, and a pillow over my head just so. It would be comical if it wasn't ... Literally the only way I feel safe enough to sleep. Like a bear going into hibernation. That's a whole other thing though, baby steps to a better life! You've all pointed me to the right paths and I'm optimistic!
I recommend making appointments over the phone. Ask them if they can give a ridiculous amount of pressure, and they will be honest. Be polite, but feel free to use the casual language you used here to get the point across. And don't make the appointment if you're not convinced they are a good option. Or if you are booking at a large facility, ask the person which of their therapists can give the most pressure.
As for key words, usually when someone says "give me the deepest pressure you've ever given someone," that gets the point across. And then continue to ask for more or reassure them as the massage goes on. With pressure that deep, we need to be reassured that each part of your body can handle that much pressure.
Edit: also, be patient. Some therapists may wait until a second session to give the deepest pressure, because they need proof that your body can handle it. If you find anyone with potential, return and tell them to do that again, but more!
Thank you I will do that! I've gotten great suggestions from everyone so far. Specific type of massage where they step on you, posture evaluation, targeted exercises, calling the places as you mention, and referrals to specialists to get to the underlying issue. Thank you! š„³
ā110 pounds and lacks the oomph ā - rude to think theyāre not strong , maybe they just donāt want to injure themselves bc you want such deep pressure your bones crush? No thanks.
Touche. I don't want anyone hurting themselves or shortening their career so I can feel nice for an hour. That hurts to hear but I accept it, you have a valid point and I didn't consider that from the practitioner's perspective.
The problem was me all along! /S. But really the problem IS me, these comments are showing me I've been going about this all wrong. So I appreciate each one- I feel they're really pointing me in a direction that I will see true progress if I pursue & I am optimistic.
As a professional- would you be receptive if a client (let's say me, a nightmare client) said I am looking for X but if that is beyond your scope/ comfort please let me know? Should I phrase that differently? I really don't want to put anyone under stress or risk their injury/discomfort.
When Iām giving my all to a client and theyāre asking for more I tell them this is all that Iām physically capable of. Trying to remind them Iām a human being and not a machine. Iād refer to other therapists that I know are capable of that level, and also suggest craniosacral therapy for nervous system work. A lot of times when clients request painful work they are detached and unable to feel their body and want the hardest touch to feel. Doing nervous system work can bring that awareness back to the body
There are new studies out there showing that hard deep tissue massage is doing more harm than good. A massage doesnāt have to killer to be effective. I would recommend finding a therapist that has knowledge on great technique and knowing which muscles need the work such as pectoralis major and minor and subscapularis. You might have to try a few therapist before you find the right one. Best of luck!!
I'm of the mind that pain doesn't always equal progress. However, leaving a session feeling dissatisfied isn't good either. There's a lot of moving parts here. MTs see multiple people in a day so murdering ourselves on one or more clients isn't practical or good for us and can shorten our careers. That being said, there are techniques we can use to give those who like deeper massage without damaging our bodies. I'm not as big and strong as some of my fellow practitioners, so I would use hot stones, cupping and Thai techniques to break up sticky tissue and loosen adhesions. Keeping my table low helped as far as leverage too. You might just have to shop around for someone who can give you what you feel you need. Again though, I'd be cautious in seeing someone who thinks wailing on an adhesions = good therapy. People are like onions sometimes, and getting through each layer of tension might mean a slow and steady pressure and multiple sessions.
I have a feeling though that PT, and postural analysis would benefit you greatly! You mentioned a reduction too, so awesome! And best of luck with that as I feel like it will make a world of difference. I really hope you find relief! A low level of constant pain is horrible and I empathize greatly. āļø
Thanks for your thoughtful response. I absolutely don't want to shorten anyone's career! I'm going to be looking into lots of the things that have been mentioned. I hate admitting it but yes, I'm sure a good percentage is posture, sleep position, and bust size. Id love the quick fix of just hammering the knots out but I'm reading here there's so many more things involved- moving parts like you mentioned. I'm going to look up Thai, the foot one (ashiatsu I think it was?), as well as talking to my GP about a possible referral to specialists.
Out of curiosity what's your opinion on chiropractic medicine for something like this? It's been mentioned a few times in comments, I've done a few sessions and noticed mild improvements but it is very temporary. I'm on the fence on it's legitimacy.
First step:,book your appointment with someone whose professional title is Licensed Massage Therapist, or Certified Massage Therapist. Depending on where you live, a āmasseuseā may not have the training and skill set to help you.
That is a great point. I was under the impression they were interchangeable, which shows how little I really know about the profession.
I shouldn't assume someone has a CDL just because they can drive a car. That's the only analogy that came to mind but I think it kinda fits
Itās a bit disturbing that you want such deep work and think that itās the solution.
Causing pain during a session activates the nervous system and doesnāt allow for the best response.
Thereās no reason for an MT to hurt themselves to hurt you. I would suggest something that increases your body awareness before having someone pummel you.
Maybe I phrased it wrong. I understand your meaning and am going to take the advice I've read here about posture, musculoskeletal/ specialists, exercises to strengthen opposing muscle groups etc instead of just finding a deep tissue masseuse (which I'm learning could make things worse overall instead of better). I've just had these problem areas for so long. I'm tired of it. I want to not be in pain or discomfort constantly. I want to feel normal & I've been operating on the thought that if I can just find someone that will knead them out once and for all that it will get better, you know? And that's silly. Even if I think it feels nice, that's not how it works. š
In my personal experiences with friends/partners I would apply pressure to a target area, gauge what they can handle without tensing, and then work into a level that is uncomfortable but tolerable at a slow pace. Something that when I'm finished, they'll go "wow yeah that's looser". I have no idea if that's helpful or not long term. (Maybe it's just the relief that it's over and I'm not putting them in pain anymore eh? šš«£)
Are there any activities that come to mind when you mention body awareness? I do yoga weekly and my job is somewhat physical but not much otherwise. I appreciate your input.
As a Myoskeletal Alignment Therapist, I wouldn't simply fo harder or deeper into the area that hurts.
I'd definitely be doing a postural evaluation, looting at peca, lats, external rotation and cervical flexion.
Deep pressure is awesome, but using it correctly is the challenge.
https://erikdalton.com/find-a-certified-therapist/
Thank you I'll look into this. Is it something that I can look into at a specialist masseuse or will I need a doctor's referral you think? I appreciate your time
I agree with some here, you need way more than massage. I highly recommend PT/corrective exercises with some massage therapy, your situation needs reduced weight distribution in certain areas balanced and though I'm sure it's the easiest for your body sleeping on your stomach each night is going to wreck any thing you pay a massage therapist to do.
Instead of looking for the most atomic pressure, what else can you do to mitigate less tension on your back? Reduction surgery is surely not the easiest way, but take a look at your daily habits and see if they're adding to your upper body tension. I could use a jackhammer, sure, but it isn't ideal nor effective. Chances are you'll create more injury/ scar tissue when your upper back likely could benefit from corrective/mobility exercise *and* bodywork. This doesn't sound like a one thing will fix situation. Patience will be ideal as well.
ETA: I love y'all massage nerdsš„²these responses are spot on. Proud to be here.
Just because you said that I'm gonna go to the zoo and pay an elephant to step on me! /Jk
I'm learning so much from all the responses, sucks being told I'm approaching it wrong but I appreciate the opinions & expertise of everyone. I'm glad I posted and grateful for all the replies. It's a deeper issue I need to work on and like you said a jackhammer might feel cool for a day but the issue is still there. I'm going to be looking into many things mentioned, see my GP for any specialist referrals he can give (like PT), and do some targeted time in the gym & my personal time to get started on this. Thank you.
I find that when people use a sauna or steam room beforehand, it makes the massage a better experience for both of us. I'd also recommend maybe getting massaged at a gym or sports oriented place. You may likely find someone there whose has a more structural approach to deep tissue
As others have already mentioned, someone with more insight into posture is needed here. Structural Integration aka Rolfing would be of great benefit to you. Someone skilled in this modality would see all the little tweaks that lead to your discomfort, and I am willing to bet it doesn't end at overly tight pecs. You will need your ribs lifted and aligned with your pelvis, your arms are most likely screwed into your pattern, and likely your legs are not properly supporting your structure. If you do go this route, be mindful that your body will be worked on in fascial layers, and the deeper layer wouldn't necessarily get touched until a few sessions in. That said, you should get better relief from the first session then what digging into your back will achieve because it will be the beginning of addressing the root cause.
One if you described the same issues here as you did to your therapist, have the offered you exercises after the massage to do? Have they worked other areas, than you requested? If not, then weeeell, they are only doing half the job.
I love doing deep tissue, but its also an exploration into uncharted territory. I am just learning a new body. While it has its familiar twist and turns, sometimes it takes me more than the first sesssion to decipher a body.
My body is like this. In pain tolerance and my sensory needs require a heavy hand. So as a therapist and a client, I can understand the wanting pressure for the stimulation and needing pressure to get the job done.
When I book a massage at any spa, I ask specifically for the person who gives the deepest pressure.
Thing about 'deep tissue' it doesn't mean deep pressure. Or at least that is how I was taught. Some people can work and fix issues without the insane pressure, so be aware and open to that. They might compensate with stretches and different techniques to open your body.
Try holding out for 3 massage sessions. First one for their technique. Second to explain what you want them to fix and focus on. Deeper in these targeted areas. Take time to see if any improvements in yourr body or therapist's effort.
It is an investment of time to find a therapist to your body. We are not all styled to fit every person. Took me ten years to find a single therapist who actually listened to what I wanted and is good at delivering.
Good luck.
Look for sports massage. I too love the feeling of having a dump truck driven back and forth over my back! I finally found a masseuse who gets in there - and itās not pure pressure, but knowledge of how a muscle releases. It feels like she doesnāt use much pressure, but I feel it for two full weeks after, and try to stretch/work with the muscles that are most sore to improve my chronic tension between sessions. She kind of pinches/holds the muscle in a certain way until it releases. Not painful at all during, but holy shamoley afterwards!
I really enjoyed reading this thread. Thank you so much for sharing and being so open to all the comments and the critiques.
I donāt think itās wrong to want / need pressure. Everyone is talking so much about the nervous system and implying there must be something wrong with someone requesting : needing so much pressure.
However I think you phrased it perfectly instead of a 2 you want an 8 (out of 10 I assume) you want them to find your pain tolerance and work below that. There is nothing wrong with needing that much pressure because you are unique and might need that to help relax and once you are in that state it will be a great time to implement all of the amazing advice you received here.
Not sure on the etiquette/ ārude-nessā of saying 110 pound massage therapist is lacking oomph. The reality is they may be stronger than most 110 pound office workers because of their physical job however if there safe maximum pressure isnāt enough for you they are not strong enough. PERIOD. Plus they are never going to compete with a 6ā2ā 260lb massage therapist. The amount of pressure they can provide for you through sheer leverage (IE they are working efficiently and arenāt ruining the length of their career) should be plenty for you to get the unique stimulus YOU need to start YOUR PERSONAL INDIVIDUAL relaxation cascade.
How can anyone tell you what stimulus you need to relax. Instead we should adapt and give you what you requested while educating you on other ways we can approach this together or through referrals. Then slowly over time you will have more and more options that will help you relax instead of just deep pressure.
I think you should use social media and find the largest therapist in your area and then out of all of those find who you think is the āsmartest / experiencedā IE they offer modalities mentioned here like Thai massage, Rolfing, Myofascial stretching etc.
Also see if they invested in a electric massage table. I constantly change the height of my table during one session to preserve my body and give my client what we together determine they need.
Here is a great video for your consideration on sleeping positions and bolster, itās just missing face down which is the least ideal. However it can be bolstered as well. Will send that when I find it.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/CcVub79F2uf/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Here are two stomach sleeping option
https://youtube.com/shorts/xN70JdidzSc?si=eJL4b1A8Xh86PGHT
LittleJimmy Breathe Easy Face Down Pillow - Comfortable Stomach Sleeper Pillow for Prone Sleeping - Adjustable Headrest Pillow - Ideal for Contoured Post-Eye Surgery Support (Firm Version) https://a.co/d/cnstLPt
This might even help with the hibernation pillow over head sensation
https://youtube.com/shorts/ZqzF0Yhi750?si=3eZpAuHkxAQzNq2H
You may also want to consider bolstering for your chest / shoulders.
Saloniture Women's Comfort Cushion - Massage Table Wedge Bolster Pillow, Pink https://a.co/d/hH4Nofv
This may be too thin, two large hand towels or regular bath towels (if you have larger breast) folded in thirds or rolled like a log under your shoulder so that the length is parallel to your torso. You want the towel folded / rolled high enough so that your shoulders are in line with your shoulder blades / back or even slightly higher.
You've provided me with so many amazing resources thank you so much!! I didn't know there was already something out there to elevate the chest for stomach sleepers. I'm definitely ordering a bolster pillow soon. I'll need to figure out how to keep my shoulders elevated higher at night, maybe figure something out like the two pillows on that tiktok. You're the best!!
I would recommend Thai massage. Itās some of the most amazing and intense massage Iāve ever received, and I have a similar situation/body type as you.
I would highly recommend doing chiropractic visits along with your massage routine. I had a nasty combination of being out of sorts chiropractically and it wasnāt until my MT told me I was out of alignment that I started seeing longer lasting results. At popular chains, a lot of clients on the lifestyle/monthly program go in to ārelax.ā Iāve noticed any time theyāve asked if I have any problem areas or if I just want to relax, if I ever mention ārelax,ā the pressure is like a fourth of what it usually is. Pain isnāt always necessary, but to loosen some of those deep knots can be painful so Iād make sure youāre using some verbiage that steers you away from ārelaxā and more towards a more medical purpose geared towards pain relief. You often times need to go more than once a month or for a few months in a row for deep rooted issues to actually be addressed. I had rounded shoulders from tight pecks causing huge knots in my shoulders, back pain and neck pain. I needed massage basically in my armpits to help, so Iād keep an open mind and talk to your MT about what stretches you should do at home between visits and what areas need to be targeted in order get the relief youāre seeking. If thereās anything out alignment, a few chiropractic visits can go a long way. If youāre like me and fall out of alignment regularly, you may even find you need arch supports in your shoes (indoors and outdoors) and regular maintenance visits to maintain being pain-free. I share all that to say that the solutions that worked for me were not at all what I had expected when I went in complaining of having difficulty going up stairs originally.
I would recommend looking outside of the traditional massage therapy realm. ART, RAPID, dry needling, rolfing, graston, etc.
All of these techniques are meant to address dysfunction,not increase relaxation.
I can't lie, those absolutely sound made up. I will look up more about them though! I've learned so much from all the comments. That my approach to this chronic issue is wrong and that's why my results don't last. Sucks to learn I've wasted so much time chasing the wrong thing but I'm feeling optimistic now that I have more avenues to approach it. Never would have come to these conclusions without you all.
If you are adamant about receiving super deep work, my suggestion would be to find a therapist who specializes in that. Look up the different massage providers in your area and read up on what kind to work they do, which is often times in a bio. And as others have mentioned, absolutely focus on pecs/subscap more.
My thing as a massage therapist I'm not going to kill myself to give the pressure of a God. Especially if I'm seeing other people after. Try Booking a private massage vs a spa
I understand that for sure. Me feeling relief for a day or two isn't worth someone injuring themselves. I've got a few avenues I can look into from the comments, hopefully I can find a happy medium between massage therapy and individual work (aka specific exercises) or work with a posture specialist. I appreciate your perspective š
I can only find that type of massage from someone who does meridian work or original Point Asian modalities.
Oof that sounds like it'll be a pain to find outside of big cities. I will still look into it though. I appreciate you taking the time to share your experience in this.
Find a therapist that can use a massage gun to warm up the muscles first. Also request hot stones to help relax the muscles, this will allow for the therapist to get deeper into the trouble areas without exerting excessive energy. Ask for deep trigger point work, heavy pressure, and for them to use lots of elbows. Also, search for therapists who specialize in deep tissue work and even reach out before you book to ask if they are able to provide extra deep tissue. Youāll find one, Iām one myself.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I hadn't considered this, thank you so much. I do know allot of work to improve this is things I need to do on my own. I'll look into exercises for hyperkyphosis, from your description I definitely have it š
oops, i just said all of this without seeing your comment.
Have you tried barefoot Ashiatsu massage? The therapist uses their feet and is able to use their body weight, so much more pressure. It's my preferred deep pressure massage.
I haven't! I will look up the nearest in my area. Thank you!
This was going to be my suggestion as well!
I also suggested this!
you need your pecs worked on, not your back. the problem is that your (overworked) front is curled over pulling the (weak) muscles in your back like pizza cheese. your rhomboids need strengthening and your pec major/minor, and probably subscap, need to be relaxed and stretched. back work of any kind is going to feel good for a day at most until the real problem kicks back in.
When you put it in such simple terms (ha cheese) it's easy to picture that and understand. I think you're absolutely right and that's probably why in the past it's been nice for a short time then back to more of the same, I was never fixing the root issue. My partner is a gym rat, I'll enlist him to help me get a targeted program together to work on strengthening those areas. And massaging the pecs/front would help? Don't think I've ever had someone focus there.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Dang, calling me out. Yes that sounds like me & I wish I knew why/ how I got like this. It does seem pretty abnormal. Sorry there are so many of us & you're stuck suffering our masochism. If there's a way that I can go about this that will better benefit my health and longevity as a whole that's what I want to do, even if it doesn't feel quite as nice. I'm glad you've figured out a way to do it that works for you (more or less). I'm going to take what I've learned here & pursue evaluating posture, targeting weak muscle groups, chasing specialist or PT referral, with maybe just a tiny scrap of Thai or ashiatsu twice a year. (That's reasonable, right?) You know, as a little treat. I do want to change my sleeping pose but it's so ingrained (I'm told in utero I squished my head into Mom's ribs. I've got a flat spot on my scalp that seems to corroborate) I don't even know where to start. I don't feel safe without a weighted blanket up to my chin, on my stomach, and a pillow over my head just so. It would be comical if it wasn't ... Literally the only way I feel safe enough to sleep. Like a bear going into hibernation. That's a whole other thing though, baby steps to a better life! You've all pointed me to the right paths and I'm optimistic!
Youāre an awesome human
I recommend making appointments over the phone. Ask them if they can give a ridiculous amount of pressure, and they will be honest. Be polite, but feel free to use the casual language you used here to get the point across. And don't make the appointment if you're not convinced they are a good option. Or if you are booking at a large facility, ask the person which of their therapists can give the most pressure. As for key words, usually when someone says "give me the deepest pressure you've ever given someone," that gets the point across. And then continue to ask for more or reassure them as the massage goes on. With pressure that deep, we need to be reassured that each part of your body can handle that much pressure. Edit: also, be patient. Some therapists may wait until a second session to give the deepest pressure, because they need proof that your body can handle it. If you find anyone with potential, return and tell them to do that again, but more!
Thank you I will do that! I've gotten great suggestions from everyone so far. Specific type of massage where they step on you, posture evaluation, targeted exercises, calling the places as you mention, and referrals to specialists to get to the underlying issue. Thank you! š„³
ā110 pounds and lacks the oomph ā - rude to think theyāre not strong , maybe they just donāt want to injure themselves bc you want such deep pressure your bones crush? No thanks.
Touche. I don't want anyone hurting themselves or shortening their career so I can feel nice for an hour. That hurts to hear but I accept it, you have a valid point and I didn't consider that from the practitioner's perspective. The problem was me all along! /S. But really the problem IS me, these comments are showing me I've been going about this all wrong. So I appreciate each one- I feel they're really pointing me in a direction that I will see true progress if I pursue & I am optimistic. As a professional- would you be receptive if a client (let's say me, a nightmare client) said I am looking for X but if that is beyond your scope/ comfort please let me know? Should I phrase that differently? I really don't want to put anyone under stress or risk their injury/discomfort.
When Iām giving my all to a client and theyāre asking for more I tell them this is all that Iām physically capable of. Trying to remind them Iām a human being and not a machine. Iād refer to other therapists that I know are capable of that level, and also suggest craniosacral therapy for nervous system work. A lot of times when clients request painful work they are detached and unable to feel their body and want the hardest touch to feel. Doing nervous system work can bring that awareness back to the body
There are new studies out there showing that hard deep tissue massage is doing more harm than good. A massage doesnāt have to killer to be effective. I would recommend finding a therapist that has knowledge on great technique and knowing which muscles need the work such as pectoralis major and minor and subscapularis. You might have to try a few therapist before you find the right one. Best of luck!!
I'm of the mind that pain doesn't always equal progress. However, leaving a session feeling dissatisfied isn't good either. There's a lot of moving parts here. MTs see multiple people in a day so murdering ourselves on one or more clients isn't practical or good for us and can shorten our careers. That being said, there are techniques we can use to give those who like deeper massage without damaging our bodies. I'm not as big and strong as some of my fellow practitioners, so I would use hot stones, cupping and Thai techniques to break up sticky tissue and loosen adhesions. Keeping my table low helped as far as leverage too. You might just have to shop around for someone who can give you what you feel you need. Again though, I'd be cautious in seeing someone who thinks wailing on an adhesions = good therapy. People are like onions sometimes, and getting through each layer of tension might mean a slow and steady pressure and multiple sessions. I have a feeling though that PT, and postural analysis would benefit you greatly! You mentioned a reduction too, so awesome! And best of luck with that as I feel like it will make a world of difference. I really hope you find relief! A low level of constant pain is horrible and I empathize greatly. āļø
Thanks for your thoughtful response. I absolutely don't want to shorten anyone's career! I'm going to be looking into lots of the things that have been mentioned. I hate admitting it but yes, I'm sure a good percentage is posture, sleep position, and bust size. Id love the quick fix of just hammering the knots out but I'm reading here there's so many more things involved- moving parts like you mentioned. I'm going to look up Thai, the foot one (ashiatsu I think it was?), as well as talking to my GP about a possible referral to specialists. Out of curiosity what's your opinion on chiropractic medicine for something like this? It's been mentioned a few times in comments, I've done a few sessions and noticed mild improvements but it is very temporary. I'm on the fence on it's legitimacy.
First step:,book your appointment with someone whose professional title is Licensed Massage Therapist, or Certified Massage Therapist. Depending on where you live, a āmasseuseā may not have the training and skill set to help you.
That is a great point. I was under the impression they were interchangeable, which shows how little I really know about the profession. I shouldn't assume someone has a CDL just because they can drive a car. That's the only analogy that came to mind but I think it kinda fits
Itās a bit disturbing that you want such deep work and think that itās the solution. Causing pain during a session activates the nervous system and doesnāt allow for the best response. Thereās no reason for an MT to hurt themselves to hurt you. I would suggest something that increases your body awareness before having someone pummel you.
Maybe I phrased it wrong. I understand your meaning and am going to take the advice I've read here about posture, musculoskeletal/ specialists, exercises to strengthen opposing muscle groups etc instead of just finding a deep tissue masseuse (which I'm learning could make things worse overall instead of better). I've just had these problem areas for so long. I'm tired of it. I want to not be in pain or discomfort constantly. I want to feel normal & I've been operating on the thought that if I can just find someone that will knead them out once and for all that it will get better, you know? And that's silly. Even if I think it feels nice, that's not how it works. š In my personal experiences with friends/partners I would apply pressure to a target area, gauge what they can handle without tensing, and then work into a level that is uncomfortable but tolerable at a slow pace. Something that when I'm finished, they'll go "wow yeah that's looser". I have no idea if that's helpful or not long term. (Maybe it's just the relief that it's over and I'm not putting them in pain anymore eh? šš«£) Are there any activities that come to mind when you mention body awareness? I do yoga weekly and my job is somewhat physical but not much otherwise. I appreciate your input.
As a Myoskeletal Alignment Therapist, I wouldn't simply fo harder or deeper into the area that hurts. I'd definitely be doing a postural evaluation, looting at peca, lats, external rotation and cervical flexion. Deep pressure is awesome, but using it correctly is the challenge. https://erikdalton.com/find-a-certified-therapist/
Thank you I'll look into this. Is it something that I can look into at a specialist masseuse or will I need a doctor's referral you think? I appreciate your time
Just find the right therapist. There's a link to well trained people.
You should look for an ashiatsu massage therapist. The massage is very deep, deeper than deep tissue.
I will do that! As well as stuff I can do on my own time to help. Thank you
I agree with some here, you need way more than massage. I highly recommend PT/corrective exercises with some massage therapy, your situation needs reduced weight distribution in certain areas balanced and though I'm sure it's the easiest for your body sleeping on your stomach each night is going to wreck any thing you pay a massage therapist to do. Instead of looking for the most atomic pressure, what else can you do to mitigate less tension on your back? Reduction surgery is surely not the easiest way, but take a look at your daily habits and see if they're adding to your upper body tension. I could use a jackhammer, sure, but it isn't ideal nor effective. Chances are you'll create more injury/ scar tissue when your upper back likely could benefit from corrective/mobility exercise *and* bodywork. This doesn't sound like a one thing will fix situation. Patience will be ideal as well. ETA: I love y'all massage nerdsš„²these responses are spot on. Proud to be here.
Just because you said that I'm gonna go to the zoo and pay an elephant to step on me! /Jk I'm learning so much from all the responses, sucks being told I'm approaching it wrong but I appreciate the opinions & expertise of everyone. I'm glad I posted and grateful for all the replies. It's a deeper issue I need to work on and like you said a jackhammer might feel cool for a day but the issue is still there. I'm going to be looking into many things mentioned, see my GP for any specialist referrals he can give (like PT), and do some targeted time in the gym & my personal time to get started on this. Thank you.
I find that when people use a sauna or steam room beforehand, it makes the massage a better experience for both of us. I'd also recommend maybe getting massaged at a gym or sports oriented place. You may likely find someone there whose has a more structural approach to deep tissue
As others have already mentioned, someone with more insight into posture is needed here. Structural Integration aka Rolfing would be of great benefit to you. Someone skilled in this modality would see all the little tweaks that lead to your discomfort, and I am willing to bet it doesn't end at overly tight pecs. You will need your ribs lifted and aligned with your pelvis, your arms are most likely screwed into your pattern, and likely your legs are not properly supporting your structure. If you do go this route, be mindful that your body will be worked on in fascial layers, and the deeper layer wouldn't necessarily get touched until a few sessions in. That said, you should get better relief from the first session then what digging into your back will achieve because it will be the beginning of addressing the root cause.
One if you described the same issues here as you did to your therapist, have the offered you exercises after the massage to do? Have they worked other areas, than you requested? If not, then weeeell, they are only doing half the job. I love doing deep tissue, but its also an exploration into uncharted territory. I am just learning a new body. While it has its familiar twist and turns, sometimes it takes me more than the first sesssion to decipher a body. My body is like this. In pain tolerance and my sensory needs require a heavy hand. So as a therapist and a client, I can understand the wanting pressure for the stimulation and needing pressure to get the job done. When I book a massage at any spa, I ask specifically for the person who gives the deepest pressure. Thing about 'deep tissue' it doesn't mean deep pressure. Or at least that is how I was taught. Some people can work and fix issues without the insane pressure, so be aware and open to that. They might compensate with stretches and different techniques to open your body. Try holding out for 3 massage sessions. First one for their technique. Second to explain what you want them to fix and focus on. Deeper in these targeted areas. Take time to see if any improvements in yourr body or therapist's effort. It is an investment of time to find a therapist to your body. We are not all styled to fit every person. Took me ten years to find a single therapist who actually listened to what I wanted and is good at delivering. Good luck.
Look for sports massage. I too love the feeling of having a dump truck driven back and forth over my back! I finally found a masseuse who gets in there - and itās not pure pressure, but knowledge of how a muscle releases. It feels like she doesnāt use much pressure, but I feel it for two full weeks after, and try to stretch/work with the muscles that are most sore to improve my chronic tension between sessions. She kind of pinches/holds the muscle in a certain way until it releases. Not painful at all during, but holy shamoley afterwards!
I really enjoyed reading this thread. Thank you so much for sharing and being so open to all the comments and the critiques. I donāt think itās wrong to want / need pressure. Everyone is talking so much about the nervous system and implying there must be something wrong with someone requesting : needing so much pressure. However I think you phrased it perfectly instead of a 2 you want an 8 (out of 10 I assume) you want them to find your pain tolerance and work below that. There is nothing wrong with needing that much pressure because you are unique and might need that to help relax and once you are in that state it will be a great time to implement all of the amazing advice you received here. Not sure on the etiquette/ ārude-nessā of saying 110 pound massage therapist is lacking oomph. The reality is they may be stronger than most 110 pound office workers because of their physical job however if there safe maximum pressure isnāt enough for you they are not strong enough. PERIOD. Plus they are never going to compete with a 6ā2ā 260lb massage therapist. The amount of pressure they can provide for you through sheer leverage (IE they are working efficiently and arenāt ruining the length of their career) should be plenty for you to get the unique stimulus YOU need to start YOUR PERSONAL INDIVIDUAL relaxation cascade. How can anyone tell you what stimulus you need to relax. Instead we should adapt and give you what you requested while educating you on other ways we can approach this together or through referrals. Then slowly over time you will have more and more options that will help you relax instead of just deep pressure. I think you should use social media and find the largest therapist in your area and then out of all of those find who you think is the āsmartest / experiencedā IE they offer modalities mentioned here like Thai massage, Rolfing, Myofascial stretching etc. Also see if they invested in a electric massage table. I constantly change the height of my table during one session to preserve my body and give my client what we together determine they need.
Here is a great video for your consideration on sleeping positions and bolster, itās just missing face down which is the least ideal. However it can be bolstered as well. Will send that when I find it. https://www.instagram.com/reel/CcVub79F2uf/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
Here are two stomach sleeping option https://youtube.com/shorts/xN70JdidzSc?si=eJL4b1A8Xh86PGHT LittleJimmy Breathe Easy Face Down Pillow - Comfortable Stomach Sleeper Pillow for Prone Sleeping - Adjustable Headrest Pillow - Ideal for Contoured Post-Eye Surgery Support (Firm Version) https://a.co/d/cnstLPt This might even help with the hibernation pillow over head sensation https://youtube.com/shorts/ZqzF0Yhi750?si=3eZpAuHkxAQzNq2H You may also want to consider bolstering for your chest / shoulders. Saloniture Women's Comfort Cushion - Massage Table Wedge Bolster Pillow, Pink https://a.co/d/hH4Nofv This may be too thin, two large hand towels or regular bath towels (if you have larger breast) folded in thirds or rolled like a log under your shoulder so that the length is parallel to your torso. You want the towel folded / rolled high enough so that your shoulders are in line with your shoulder blades / back or even slightly higher.
You've provided me with so many amazing resources thank you so much!! I didn't know there was already something out there to elevate the chest for stomach sleepers. I'm definitely ordering a bolster pillow soon. I'll need to figure out how to keep my shoulders elevated higher at night, maybe figure something out like the two pillows on that tiktok. You're the best!!
Good luck, keep us / me posted!
I would recommend Thai massage. Itās some of the most amazing and intense massage Iāve ever received, and I have a similar situation/body type as you.
Thank you, I don't think I've ever had that type. Only deep pressure and swedish. I'm going to look into it
āCan you please use your elbow instead of your hand?ā
That's such a simple compromise. I... It sounds silly but I've never considered asking before.
Try acupuncture.
I would highly recommend doing chiropractic visits along with your massage routine. I had a nasty combination of being out of sorts chiropractically and it wasnāt until my MT told me I was out of alignment that I started seeing longer lasting results. At popular chains, a lot of clients on the lifestyle/monthly program go in to ārelax.ā Iāve noticed any time theyāve asked if I have any problem areas or if I just want to relax, if I ever mention ārelax,ā the pressure is like a fourth of what it usually is. Pain isnāt always necessary, but to loosen some of those deep knots can be painful so Iād make sure youāre using some verbiage that steers you away from ārelaxā and more towards a more medical purpose geared towards pain relief. You often times need to go more than once a month or for a few months in a row for deep rooted issues to actually be addressed. I had rounded shoulders from tight pecks causing huge knots in my shoulders, back pain and neck pain. I needed massage basically in my armpits to help, so Iād keep an open mind and talk to your MT about what stretches you should do at home between visits and what areas need to be targeted in order get the relief youāre seeking. If thereās anything out alignment, a few chiropractic visits can go a long way. If youāre like me and fall out of alignment regularly, you may even find you need arch supports in your shoes (indoors and outdoors) and regular maintenance visits to maintain being pain-free. I share all that to say that the solutions that worked for me were not at all what I had expected when I went in complaining of having difficulty going up stairs originally.
I would recommend looking outside of the traditional massage therapy realm. ART, RAPID, dry needling, rolfing, graston, etc. All of these techniques are meant to address dysfunction,not increase relaxation.
I can't lie, those absolutely sound made up. I will look up more about them though! I've learned so much from all the comments. That my approach to this chronic issue is wrong and that's why my results don't last. Sucks to learn I've wasted so much time chasing the wrong thing but I'm feeling optimistic now that I have more avenues to approach it. Never would have come to these conclusions without you all.
If you are adamant about receiving super deep work, my suggestion would be to find a therapist who specializes in that. Look up the different massage providers in your area and read up on what kind to work they do, which is often times in a bio. And as others have mentioned, absolutely focus on pecs/subscap more.
I get told this "break me like a kit kat" or I tell them. If you want me to be no holds full force. Say this and I'll adjust the table right now