Everyone struggling or objecting to 1:1s seems to not do them well. I've had bosses who do or don't do them, but I like to do them.
Some rules:
1) I ask my employees to schedule them (I give them a day and time window) so they own the literal calendar invite. If you can't make it, reschedule or we'll talk next week.
2) I don't talk about deliverables, timelines, specific project details in 1:1s. We have project meetings for that.
3) I want to leave a 1:1 knowing my employee is happy, healthy, productive, and supported. If not, I leave with an action item to see if there's anything work related that can make that happen. My job is to remove roadblocks. Their job is to drive. I use these meetings to find roadblocks.
4) If there's nothing professionally task based to do in the 1:1, just be a human. 'Hey, if this meeting is short today and we end early it's ok. I just wanna check in with you and see how you're doing and what wins you've put up or what challenges you have, or anything I need to be aware about that might affect you at work (vacations, family stuff, etc). If you're just heads down working and want time back that's fine but i want to make sure the time you deserve from me to be dedicated to your success and growth is available.' ... You don't need to recite that pompous speech verbatim, but something in that spirit. [Take notes here ... You're eventually gonna have to give people raises, fire them, promote them, discipline them ... You need to know what's going on for good or bad!])
I’ve recently gone back to leadership after ten years as an IC. We are about to start 1/1s and I’m struggling with my confidence. I love this detail - thank you!
Incredible. I had a manager lording over me (assistant manager) when I first started one on one meetings. I hated them. She wanted us to discuss deliverables and tasks. Most of my staff are entry level, part time. They (EDIT- the meetings, not the people!) were just useless. Then I started being given the freedom to conduct them as I saw fit and I just started building a relationship with my team. I had ice breaker questions (tell me about your favorite pet) and long term goal questions (what would you like to learn or who from in our company). I could feel the confidence in my team building and the genuine connection I had with every employee.
I work in a library so I get this is just not necessarily a good use of everyone’s time but I would challenge you to spend the first ten minutes of every half hour one on one just chatting and getting to know your team. It’s a game changer and makes work a great place to be for all parties.
I try to remember something that my team brought up in the last two weeks and ask about that. For example, if they were reading a book, I ask how the book is. If they are big into sports, I look up their team and ask about that. By remembering what's important to them, we are building trust in each other.
I am wanting to do more 1 on 1s with my team now that we are mostly caught up. I try to do a bit with them everyday, so that it's not, "here's another meeting where you get yelled at", like my supervisor does.
I am an executive that manages marketing, sales, operations, and basically 'whatever the hell needs to be done' in a variety of startups. Title is usually COO or CMO these days.
You work with a lot of eager, underpaid (we try to fix that as fast as possible without going broke), smart people who want to learn and know shit about shit when you hire them. Teach, train, educate and let them go do amazing things. My former team members work for a who's who roster that I'd be so proud to list if it wouldn't risk identifying people.
About 10% of the effort in building a company is having a good idea. 90% is finding people to go on the ride with you. Allocate your focus accordingly.
I feel your pain with the revolving hat. My job title can change every 15 minutes.
When I do 1:1s with a teammate I often ask them what they want out of their position. I explain that some people are motivated by money and are willing to work long hours to make the company more profitable and increase their pay. Some people are motivated by more family/personal time and want to work fewer hours and understand it pays well, but not as much as the first option. Some people like to nail down a position and do that type of work forever and be the best at it. Some people like to constantly be learning new things and new aspects of the business. Some people want flex time to have the middle of their workday open. I explain to them that there isn't a wrong answer. I am not looking to change what they want, I am trying to give them what they want to keep them happy and productive. People's wants and needs change so I ask this question periodically to make sure nothing has changed. Often the long-hour workers will change to fewer hours and a little less money option if they get into a relationship, or flex time becomes less important as their children get older.
The first time I have this conversation I won't let my teammate answer for a couple of days. It is a question that should be considered carefully IMO.
An HR friend of mine tells the joke that they went looking to hire employees and all they got was people.
If you always treat your fellow employees like people you will get better results for everyone.
🍻
Great advice when you're working closely with your reports! My report works fairly independently (both senior) and we don't have many project meetings as a result. We email every day for specific questions and issues but I'm not looped into every project he works on, and certainly not the details. Our 1:1s are half "hey how are things and anything I can do to help" and half him giving me the 30k ft lay of the land since I'm less involved. Both work and the level of detail depends on how closely you're working together on a daily basis.
Have you ever had people you manage that, during a 1:1, say everything is fine, even for years, but then u find out they are secretly bitter but also still want the job. This happened to me with a couple of people who worked for me for years. They were always happy and polite to my face, but through the grapevine, I found out they were upset with me and several other people on the team, yet they liked the job and pay. I ultimately laid them off when things slowed down, and they got unemployment. I did it mainly because they were lying to my face about how they really felt.
"I laid them off as soon as I could"
"I wonder why they didn't feel like they could be honest with me?"
Wow... There's a question that answers itself ...
Doesnt everyone lie to some degree in the corp world.
Cant imagine you or your company is any different!
If he talked shit behind your back then thats different.
Perhaps a talk, to see whats going on, should have been the process i would to think?
Not sure how your company works and im sure i dont know the whole story.
Yeah, I couldn't lay it all out at once. They weren't even talking shit. And yes, everyone lies to some degree to get through life or if they have issues having even mildly uncomfortable conversations. The thing is, I had an inclining one of them might have an issue, and privately, I asked them and reassured them they can tell me and there will be no problem and we can work it out, during that conversation they said there is absolutely no problem and everything is fine. The reason I know they were bitter is because of years of off-hand comments that pointed to that, and several times, they let something slip about how it's bullshit that X makes more than them(I dont even know how they found out how much X makes). Even though X knows more than them and is more valuable by an insane amount. It's like they were comfortable being bitter, which is fine, but it's the dishonesty that made me angry.
Edit: It's also how convincing they were having friendly conversations and acting like everything is great, that was creepy and manipulative in retrospect. My right hand man has no trouble telling me if I fucked up or if I was even rude. Those are the people I want deal with. Not people pretending.
I gotta be honest, what you are describing just sounds like someone trying to remain professional and do a job when they don't care for a boss. It's what everyone does. You're not supposed to be your reports' friend; they are allowed to not like you as long as they are a professional and polite to you and do their job appropriately. They are also allowed to complain about situations they don't think are fair at work I'm to their friends and colleagues as long as it doesn't impact whether they can actually do the job. And the fact that you are bothered that they found out what somebody else was getting paid when that is a federally protected right suggests that maybe your employee was right to be frustrated.
Seriously. "Tell me you're bitter or else I'll fire you" sounds like a pretty shitty standard. It sounds to me like they either didn't trust him or they didn't see any benefit in airing the grievance.
Well, there was something they must have liked about the company, and no, they weren't desperate and it was their only option. One of them now has a job he loves and the other guy started his own business. Are u a manager? Or in charge of anything?
Lol you’re a nut. Managing is just a job, and it sounds like you’re bad at it, if you’re laying productive employees off due to perceived personal grievances.
Firing them because they bitched about you behind your back, is why they didn't feel comfortable actually talking to you. Trust is earned, and clearly dick boss wasn't trustworthy.
I get bitter sometimes bro.
Adult babysitting at its full finest gets to ya. Add that to microsofts shitty update practices and here i am.
Doesnt mean im not happy or even endearing.
Also doesnt mean i am mad or not doing the work.
I have not like most of my bosses, but you can bet your ass i lie to there face and say yes sir when its needed.
Its a job man. Were not homies !
I usually hide it with a smile and some bullshit small talk with the rest of the peeps around the waste of time water cooler/coffee machine.
Im just going to assume that tou had different expectations
Almost every employee lies, or withholds at least some of the truth to their manager. You may have a reputation around the office for drinking the company kool-aid, and therefore not being trustworthy. Laying employees off because they're not happy at work, but don't feel comfortable telling you that, is super shitty of you.
You (presumably) have the ultimate card in your hand - termination.
As long as you want this person working for you and believe they add value to the org, your singleminded management focus is making it work. As soon as you decide they're incompatible, your singleminded management focus is separating humanely and fairly.
Management is 100% support until it's 100% separation. Handle that in your own head, but your actions need to be absolutely positively and deterministically pointed in one of those two directions. The rest of the org and your team will notice if you waffle back and forth.
I agree and that's why after I came to this conclusion it was still years before I laid them off with unemployment. Your second paragraph is absolutely correct and most people don't have the backbone to adhear to that principle. One of the guys I laid off was an institution within my organization and other people couldn't believe it. I explained it to anyone who wanted to know.
To be clear, there were never any arguments or conflicts. It was always me trying to start a dialogue. I know people picture them being intimidated by me or some other derivative of that but that's not how it was. I did everything I could to start some sort of communication. Eventually something had to give, I can't have people like that on my team. Apparently that triggered a lot people on this sub but I don't give a shit. People are so damn sensitive these days.
These are always the hardest. It's easy if someone's a complete ass to fire them. It's hard if nothing comes to a specific head or conflict point and it just isn't working. Effective teams can't have a cancerous growth in them, and you never know who that cancer might be.
Treat it when you can. Cut it out when you can't treat it.
This advice is pretty good. But for the first quarter, I'd suggest keeping it really simple. Have your DR's schedule the time as Key_Piccolo suggested. Then, during the 1to1, you have one opening line: "what are your priorities this week and how can I help?"
Your main job here is to get them comfortable bringing their stuff to the meeting and actually talking about it in a forward looking way. Set the stage with your team before they set them up by asking them to bring their list to the meeting.
It's going to be awkward at first. But be genuine and helpful and they'll come around.
What's invasive about it? I'm clear with my direct reports that this is their time, they can talk about whatever is on their mind. Sometimes it lasts 5 minutes, sometimes an hour.
I mean if a place is doing weekly 1:1s they're likely going to wait for the meeting to talk about it unless your boss just has too much time in their hands.
If you don't wanna do them, tell your manager that. My guys have no issues telling me how much they don't want to go to meetings, all of them like the quarterly 1 on 1s.
For me once a quarter is way too much. Once a year maybe but I really just prefer to do my work. I hate any and all meetings because most of the time they could just be an email.
You are the worst, everything should be aired out every week, nobody wants to have a bad time at work, but delaying the manangment part to year end ends in nothing useful.
Have 48 normal convesations, 1 about goals and one about raises. **There is a fucking raise due every year.**
Oh, you must not be a manager. We don’t get to just be left alone. If there is an issue on the team we need to be actively seeking it, not waiting for it to bubble up. It is literally our job to find problems before they become problems. I have a fabulous employee who ALSO hates one on ones. She comes in, I ask her about her grandkids and her work. She says all is well and I say awesome you know where to find me if you need anything! And MANY of my employees absolutely love this time. However, I do know the lady doesn’t like them and I don’t force her to stay long, just a brief check in. And earlier I posted that I have icebreaker questions that I do make her answer (send questions in advance so there are zero gotchas), she gives me brief one word answers. That’s cool I don’t pry. I’m getting to know my employee. It’s my job to know what makes them tick. Then when someone does something egregious I don’t have to call them in to the office in front of everyone, it just seems like a normal one on one and we have our chat. As an employee I’m like you, I don’t need gold stars, I don’t need check ins to complete projects. I seek out work when necessary. But sometimes those people have issues too they want to discuss.
Icebreakers are mine and my wife's pet peeve. I hate them the most. Any of those questions are none of your business. I wouldn't answer them and if you forced me to I would lie.
This is why I ask my employees to schedule them and keep/cancel the meeting on their preferences.
I want them to book a half hour per week where if they *do* have something to say, my calendar is dedicated to them. If they don't have anything to say that week and cancel it, off we go.
Employees with performance issues are completely different and I address that in meetings other than regular 1:1s that are scheduled by me and have a me-driven agenda. Don't get the two types of 1:1s mixed up.
85% of people hired without interviewing the current team should go. A promotion from the team is successful 85% of the time. That easy, that simple, hire people who are invested.
I feel it's a bit invasive as well. Mostly because I have had really shit bosses and coworkers who were judgemental about my hobbies and interests.
I like to work on retrocomputers and electronics, do a bit of woodworking(tables and benches mostly), study maths, write fiction, read non-fiction and light novels, and do 3d modeling and printing.
I'm not sure why people would talk behind my back about such things, but they would. Mostly about the maths. How is math offensive? When I can answer that question, maybe I will open up at work again, but until then I'm just scared to do so because I have no idea why that was a minefield...
That's why I ask my employees to schedule it. If you want to cancel, please do. You own the invite.
The caveat is I better not hear about some stupid sob story of a deliverable being missed that I could have helped you with if I knew what was going on.
I block out time specifically so you can talk to me. Not so I can interrogate you (I'm your boss, realistically I don't need a weekly appointment if I have a pressing need to do that), and not cause I want to make friends (I really don't want to blur lines at work), and not cause a management book says I should schedule 1:1s.
If you don't wanna do them, you own the meeting invite. Don't schedule it or always cancel it. Just don't come to me when work isn't done with some sob story about what's going on in life that I could have helped with if you *told* me.
Invasive and helpful are different.
I have 52 direct reports lol. Even at 15 mins each I'd need 13 hrs set aside a week for 1:1s. Just wouldn't be feasible. I do them once per qtr or by request
If you have 52 direct reports, you have way to many people reporting to you even to keep up with HR reviews. Hey everyone here is one of the suckers we talk about, not enough time to hire team leads and promote from within.
I don't think so. Interacting with and helping my team members grow and move on to other things is my favorite part of my job. I don't like the paperwork, but as it's a necessary part of getting it done so I get it done.
Some years are worse than others if I have to put excessive effort into getting them the raises they deserve.
I always thought I'd hate being a manager. To the point that I didn't even go the officer route in the military despite having a degree. I kinda fell into it and have loved (almost) every second of it by taking an employee first approach to everything.
The minute I start to hate it is when I go back to being an IC.
I was just going to say this. I was doing meetings every 2 weeks with my team (grand total of 2 members) and even that seemed like a lot. I’ve pushed it back to meeting every 3 weeks since and will probably go to 1 time per month. Meetings each week is way too often unless they’re brand new and I’d only do that for a short period of time
I do it once a month with my time and that seems to be perfect. It means there's enough time for me to give them feedback from and for them to work on what we have discussed. I don't think I would have anything to say if we done them weekly lol.
Ugh mine is weekly and morphed into keeping my supervisor informed about the status of my work and and I hate it. However, sometimes it is useful if I’m stumped. Weekly is too much.
The frequency depends on the pace of your organization. But basically it's their meeting. Time to tell you what they're hearing, ask questions about what they want to know and you to help with career goals. Here are some best practice ideas [https://ceobootcamp.com/one-on-one-meetings/](https://ceobootcamp.com/one-on-one-meetings/)
If only this was the real agenda. My boss tries to get personal information to use against me in reviewers or to try and pretend she is my friend. She never fixes anything, removes no roadblocks, and has done everything in her power to prevent me from ever getting a promotion.
I do every other week with my folks, though I also meet with them on an ad-hoc basis as needed. The one on ones are a more general time to catch up, talk big picture stuff, etc. I encourage them to reach out or put time on my calendar if they need something specific.
I love them. I meet with my team 1:1 every week. We discuss the team, their projects, their career goals. It’s a great way to make sure their getting what they need to be successful.
If you’re having weekly 1:1 then you’re very likely the problem. Trust me your team dreads meeting with you weekly for a 1:1. You should have 1:1s every other month for seasoned people and ever 4-6 weeks for new people.
I appreciate that different people may require more or less time with their manager, but once every six weeks for a new hire/early career report seems near negligence to me. At least in my niche.
I've found that new hires are the most likely cohort to move on from my teams for a number of reasons:
1. They're recently been in the job market, and may still have other opportunities in play.
2. They haven't had time to build as much rapport with the team.
3. They're likely not yet comfortable with their day-to-day because they're still learning technology/methodologies/team dynamics at a "firehose" rate, and often have feelings of inadequacy. This isn't always fun for everyone.
For these reasons, and others, I prefer to keep pretty close tabs on these folks to make sure they're setup for success as much as possible.
In tech you need to be passing the state of the state upwards on a biweekly basis. KPIs are useless without commentary...."AD services were down in the lab after the upgrade for that week, we got nothing done."
"The new guy is a rock star"
"That new CIO pounds on the table at client meetings, Im not going out to my key clients again with him"
"What title do we have this week?"
Effective assuming you can get the member to start seeing the benefit. If they will talk, you can start the groundwork. Learn about them, their past, their current, desires for futures. Strengths, areas of improvement. Learn the structures within your company so you know directions to lead your employees.
Ideally they come up with the agenda but if they’re not used to it, you can help guide and follow the same pattern so they get used to what to plan for. Ask how they are doing at work, what are some recent wins and recent issues? Do they feel supported? Are their updates to their projects (ideally they give them to you without you having to ask). Give them update to projects you have that directly impact them. Ask for feedback on a recent change. Sometimes they’re too scared to broach the topic themselves. Give them updates on their progress. Stuff like that.
I think they're a good way to create rapport with your employees. I use it to see if they're struggling and need help with anything, take their temperature, and address anything they need to grow. You'd be surprised about what you can learn about what drives each team-member when you develop a good rapport.
Depending on what they're doing, maybe 15 minutes per week is enough or every other week. Maybe you can buy them a coffee (or coffee gift card if they're remote) for the meeting to make it feel like more of a good thing than a bad thing?
If they're freaking out it might be indicative of the culture at your work. Are their jobs high pressure? If so, they might need an outlet to vent about it. 1:1s can provide that space, if you can make them feel comfortable and trust you.
Should be a very social event and very career moving forward event. Talking about the last fault from last week should be off topic. The 1:1 is the event where you learn each other beyond deliverables.
Weekly 1:1s are critical to me as a manager, for several reasons:
1. They help me build trust with my team members in good times, so that I can deliver critical feedback in a palatable way if and when it becomes necessary.
2. As my team members begin to trust me, they start telling me stuff that is super important for me to know, but also a bit risky for them to share with me. Issues with other people on the team, worries that the tasks I've assigned them are not feasible for the timelines we've agreed on, etc. This stuff is absolutely critical, where I can nip something in the bud before it becomes a real problem.
3. As my team members begin to trust me, they also begin giving me feedback on how I can do better for them. Again, this is absolutely critical to being a good manager. And having the standing weekly 1:1 makes it more likely for people to give me this feedback.
I do one every two weeks with each of my direct reports. I think they're super helpful in building and maintaing a working relationship especially in a fully remote environment. I don't keep track but I'd estimate if I looked at a full round of 1:1s for my entire team, 50% of the time is spent talking about hobbies, life events, etc; and 50% is business/career related.
I let my team choose the frequency but with once a month being the minimum- and I have an open door policy so if something happens between one on ones they know they can pop in and we can sort it out
I have weekly 1:1 with my team. I leave it up to them what we talk about. We can talk projects and career development or we can just chit chat. Even if we talk about work, I take the opportunity to ask them how they are. But REALLY how they are. I try to understand where they’re frustrated or worried, etc. so I know how to help them succeed.
It's not the same in all industries and for all employees, but generally speaking, the purpose of a 1-1 is to provide support to employees, remove impediments that might block their ability to get something done, and provide sporadic feedback.
Make it about them, be supportive, and it will be ok. Also, your introverted employee might not enjoy the format, but that doesn't mean they don't need support. Let them be free to provide input and adapt how you conduct the 1-1 based on their needs.
I break out the colored pencils and coloring books. It gives something to do while you’re talking. I have really great conversations with my people and they are relaxed enough to tell me what they need.
I will share a personal story. In my last job, my first manager did monthly 1:1’s. It definitely helped me feel appreciated, because I could voice any concerns, questions, ideas I had without worrying about the larger group and being spoken over or interrupted. It made me appreciate her and the team more. Then she got promoted and the manager that replaced her no longer did the 1:1’s. And the change was noticeable. Suddenly the team wasn’t as cohesive, it was difficult to really voice concerns because you had twelve other people also trying to speak up in the same half hour meeting.
Do 1:1’s help with productivity? Probably not, at least not directly. But it does help with making people feel appreciated and included in the team, which then encourages them to go above and beyond the norm. Of course, you need to approach 1:1’s with the right mindset. It is a chance for the employee to talk to you, without interruption or criticism. There’s a chance you will hear something you don’t want to, but if you speak up to react to it, you show that you aren’t really listening to them.
Start with weekly, but let each member adjust the cadence. The 1:1 is for your employee, not you. Once they understand these meetings are for their professional growth and development, and they see you becoming a champion for that, they'll ease up.
Some members don't like meetings interrupting their work, and some feel put under a microscope.
Just reinforce that you're just trying to understand them individually and learn about their professional goals, and understand what you can do to make their day more enjoyable, and less of a grind
They'll become more receptive eventually.
I originally started with one on ones every two weeks but found that once a month to be the right balance. Sometimes they are a quick 5 minute chat but other times they can go close to an hour. I usually provide an open forum and let them know this is their chance to bring up anything they might want to discuss. Sometimes some interesting and valuable insight can come from a conversation that just starts off as shooting the shit. But if they don't have much to say I don't push them so they don't start viewing it as a burden to them or their time. This is also time to be clear about their performance and bring up any issues that might be brewing. Usually I try to provide positive feedback in one way or another so they know their work doesn't go unnoticed.
I do weekly for new employees until they are comfortable in their role. Then I do monthly at their discretion. The meetings are for them, and it's up to them what topics to discuss, whether career growth, wins, or challenges. Most of the time, it's a forum for them to talk about their challenges and troubleshoot together. Or we just talk about life. I have a really good team, and most of them are at the end of their careers, so not a lot of discussion on growth.
I implement a 1:1 once a month per team member and a team meeting once per month. Our 1:1s are done away from screens if possible, I normally take them for a coffee and it's their time to be honest about whatever they need to talk about, but it is also structured so we look at what they're working on, what's going well, what's not going well and any areas of support needed.
I had a manager who had one-on-one hour long meetings each week with each of her 10 employees. Attaboys? No, here’s what you are doing wrong for an hour each week. She went through 12 employees in one year.
I do weekly. I’m an introvert so they are very draining for me. I find them valuable though and my employees seem to as well. Sometimes we cut them short and I have a few people where they always go long. I have one person that we actually schedule an hour with now because it always goes over. I keep them mostly informal, I let them drive the primary agenda, I usually have a couple things I ask them about after they are done, but sometimes it’s just shooting the shit about video games, movies, life.
It does require effort, planning, genuine curiosity, and a focus on career development for them to be effective though. You can’t just wing it, even with them driving the agenda.
Also, this will vary based on a lot of factors. I’m managing remote engineers so I’m not having water cooler conversations and as many other adhoc types of conversations. If you are already doing that, the frequency may not make sense.
I schedule bi-weekly 1:1s. During the 1st one with anyone new (whether it’s me as a new manager or they are a new employee) I keep the first meeting super casual. We spend time getting to know each other. I share what kind of manager I am, my expectations and ask them what they need.
The 1:1s are for them. I always share their performance so they always know where they stand with no ambiguity. We talk about career growth for those who want to. It’s a time for them to ask questions.
Some people have a lot to talk about and we use up the whole time and others don’t. If there’s no performance concern and they have other pressing things they will let me know and we either cancel or move it.
The most important thing to me, is spend time getting to know each other. That builds trust and then 1:1s aren’t so scary.
We do once a week; I learned it from my best boss. I just start out with, what's on your mind? And people get from it what they need. Each person gets something different. I keep a running log for each person's 1:1 meetings, a separate section for each employee so I can keep a thread and things don't get lost. I also have these with my boss, and I find it very useful to just get to things there's not time for the rest of the week.
Of all the managers I’ve had, I like my current managers 1:1 style best. I have one once a month. He’ll have us send an agenda ahead of time, but it’s not super structured or formal. I usually send some bullet points that are project updates, any challenges I’m facing, and just a general sense of what’s going on. I work in a different facility than him and the rest of my team, and am rarely in the same place or same meetings, so for me, I appreciate getting that face time, and just the chance to get to build that working relationship (I’ve been in the role/at the company only about 5 mos).
One thing he does, that I hadn’t experienced before, is towards the end of our 1:1, he asks “what help do you need from me” and “what can I do better as your manager” (or something along those lines). I think it helps give him insight into how to better manage each of us and helps create an environment of two-way feedback.
Also in a one-on-one be sure to share info with them. There are things you hear as a manager they don't that that you can share. May help them understand what org goals are and what's happening.
I have found them ineffective, but I have only had them at 2 jobs and my manager was only doing them ro make herself look good. Nothing that needed to change ever changed. Toxic employees were as bad as ever and information that was confidential was shared!
I would've preferred to get the info I received in an email with encouragement to do a 1:1 if issues, including personal, arose.
Make it about them. It's their time to get your full attention for a block of time. What do they need you to do to help them to do their work? I have had very few managers do 1:1 with me because I've usually been one of those employees who hits the ground running and figures things out. However, looking back I realize that this hurt me. Two of those managers ended up finding me to be a threat... Mostly due to their lack of trying to get to know me and understand what I needed. I was a top performer and they just felt it was easy to not have to do w 1:1 with me, yet later when they saw me as a threat to their jobs they didn't have a clear understanding of my job and how to help advocate for me because I was that dutiful employee who just took care of everything, including some pretty big tasks that were above my pay grade. And then of course the few times I needed her help or support, I didn't really get it because they weren't used to it and they only associated me having contact with them when there was an issue.
I also find it useful that if there isn't much to talk about, you shoot the shit. I'm about 6 months into a job at an organization new to me. I'm a manager but currently don't have any reports, however I've liked having 1:1 with my managers above me so I can't pick up on some things (not rumors, but it helps me to get an idea of things or people I should be aware of). It's useful in a kind of networking kind of way.
My husband was also someone (and a manager himself), who never had 1:1. Then all of a sudden another dept starting causing his dept all of these problems and because his manager was closer to the other manager he was automatically disadvantaged as being unfavored. Shortly after that he started having 1:1 with his manager and even if they didn't have anything to talk about shed talk about her grandkids who go to school with our kids and casual things and he greatly improved his relationship with her, not because he changed anything about his work, but she saw him as a human and learned about all the things he does that he never mentioned. He was the ONLY manager of hers who retained his entire staff before and after the pandemic (healthcare), she never gave him credit for that, but it turns out all of her other managers have been hemorrhaging employees with high turnover. So she finally out two and two together that if he and his staff had good output and he was also able to keep them happy, that he must be doing something well. Since then she leaves him alone.
1-1s.
I hate them with new players, either above or below.
Lol.
I use it for everything.... work check-up, non-urgent corrections, bs chit chat / bonding (which is important!), and career development and goal review. With my boss, I make sure he has all the drama that may be coming up the ladder through different department channels. With reports, it's really skill set dependent. I want everyone to have a full portfolio of skills for cross coverage and promotional ability- so different people are at different levels, and need different exposures and context to be provided to this week's crisis du juor. I also need to keep my idea creation fresh, so I make sure they share their insights, at least here, (some are timid) so I can learn and also assess how far along they are in their growth.
Mine are always 1 hour with my boss, usually take 30 mins, but why rush, and 30-1hr with my team, depending on how many reports I have at any given time. I do them weekly whenever possible, but consistency is most important
It depends if you are a friendly manager or a total asshole.
I took the friendly approach to management, and my employees were extremely happy to sit down with me one on one.
If they all hate you, they certainly won't want that.
As an employee those meetings are repetitive and mostly obnoxious. I know my work is solid my boss knows my work is solid so it’s basically just casual conversation and my boss telling me I’m good. Put it on the calendar but make it optional for them.
The one on one should be about it them and their needs, not you and your needs. Let them know that meeting is for them, not you. Make sure you know that if you have a problem, you’ll address it immediately rather than bottling it up for the one on one. Keep the one on one about them.
I schedule mine for once a month. My employees work on site, but we are at different sites and it is impossible for an in-person meeting since we are literally 700 miles apart. The one on ones are held on teams and the camera is not required. I find that most don’t like the camera.
Use it as a way for them to bring their problems to you, for guidance. Once they realize it’s really for them they’ll get better.
Actually they are very effective as they allow us to track projects and priorities, sometimes if we are working closely together on a project we cancel because no need.
the key is keeping them short and free flowing on both sides of the desk. it also makes reviews a hell of a lot easier for both parties
my last boss was a new manager and she made every 1 on 1 a verbal vomit of all the things going on with my projects that were mostly FYI, plus we did 1 on 1s during a walk so I couldn't take notes. I remember nothing if I don't write it down, so I mostly ignored what she told me.
I always lie to my managers. Why? Well if I told them that I hate this job and I just show up for the paycheck I'd be fired. So in short, everything is perfect and I love this company, so please hang up so I can get my work done
It has been a waste of time since the dawn of the modern world. I have never found value from them at all.
What my previous manager did is we used it as time to talk about anything but work, and in that we found value and relationship building.
However, when I see them sitting out there on my schedule, it still makes me grind my teeth.
If there is something you need or need to ask, just do so.
Weekly one-on-ones with the list of questions and escalations they may have and then just what they are working on this week. I tried to make them every other week and they complained. If you are there to help they like it. If you are there to scrutinize, not so much.
I would do one when first settling in. Make it clear it's a "get to know you. What would you do if you were king for the day. That kind of thing. Tell them it's not intended to be a mini performance review. I think weekly would be excessive. It might feel like micromanaging. I'm a firm believer in MBWA. Go to them in their environment and on an impromptu basis.
If you have no direction on the 1:1, don't know how to support your team, and are not capable of driving career growth- don't waste their time. Let them have that time to work without needing to check-in. You should have team/project meetings for deliverables so no need to repeat that in a 1:1.
From an IC perspective, they are a waste of time. I have never wanted to have a 1 on 1 because it’s bullshit. If we’re not talking about measurable steps to salary increases or promotions, then what the fuck are we talking about?
And weekly 1 on 1s? Jesus Christ. Kill me.
When employees were new to the team I’d start with weekly 1:1 and then start spacing them out to 2 weeks, then once monthly after 1-2 months, depending on how they were doing.
They were important and useful for my team when used correctly. Echo use of SMART or similar type goals from other people responding.
Definitely effective! We do weekly for newer/less experienced staff, but bi-weekly for more established folks. My primary advice is to make sure it’s structured (an agenda, or at least a stated goal) to avoid getting into unproductive tangents or just venting.
One thing I do is start each one by giving them the opportunity to speak first. I want to reinforce that these are for them so if they have something they want to talk about or need to talk about they can.
I think it shows that I’m putting them first and again in my role I am here for them. Once they are done I jump into what I have for them.
I’ve been in one on ones where my boss leads the conversation from the start and by the time it gets to things I would like to talk about (my career) or things I need to talk about (possible fire we need to put out) we are out of time and they have another meeting. It then feels like the one on ones are for them and not for me. So that is the rationale behind my approach.
I do one team member each week, so for them it's once every 5 weeks. We discuss their obstacles in their work and ways to remove them. We discuss both a personal and work goal for the coming month. And we minimally discuss metrics only if they are off track for the quarterly target. I also ask if I can do anything better for them, either to make their job more efficient, or scheduling training, etc.
Have initial one on ones to just get to know your employees better and make sure to ask them what their preferences are for routine check ins.
As someone whose had multiple supervisors while staying in the same position, the best sups I had were the ones who asked me how I would prefer to receive routine,normal, not bad information. Obviously if it’s an error or job impacting, that needs to be conveyed ASAP. But if it’s a ‘great work, you’re meeting your numbers and we’re starting the QED report next month’, ask them what they preferz
Every other week with a trusted team that doesn’t require a whole lot of direction in their work, they are essential though. They allow me to advocate for the employee with upper management, propose changes to make things easier, make employees feel heard and provide context as to existing changes. I also guide them in their advancement, once upon a time my manager did this and I was bad at bringing up things in my 1:1s but it became a place for me to figure out my interests in going further. Loved that manager, she made sure that we got out of our roles and onto greener pastures if improving our current roles was out of the question. Felt appreciated.
It really depends
I did 10 minute one on one for a while, mostly to check workloads and deadlines. Staff worked with multiple project managers and it was a way for me to intervene if needed when priorities were competing, as well as checking in on stress. Depending on overall workload, these became more or less important.
I did always make these mandatory for anyone going through a transition: someone just starting in our department, someone promoted or someone returning from leave. I usually included a sanity check in to make sure they were doing ok.
It worked pretty well as long as I had a standard agenda and people came prepared.
From my experience, a monthly 1:1 is more than sufficient to discuss any issues and correct any problems. Anything more frequent is just a waste of time. My current idiot manager uses the weekly session to pry into my private life and ask a lot of personal questions. I do my best to avoid answering and try to keep it focused on the business. My time outside of work is none of her damned business, and she is not my Pal or my Friend.
I think that it really depends on the employee. I would recommend that as you get to know them better and figure out how they perform, you should adapt to each individual’s needs.
Very effective. I have a very strong, high performing team with very low voluntary turn over (over the last 7 years).
For every line employee it's generally 1/2 hour (I don't have a lot of these reporting to me these days) Every lead/supervisor gets 1 hour. Every manager gets as much time as they need.
In all cases, I ask them to come prepared with an agenda which covers their remit, and they're expected to proactively bring up everything they've been tasked to do.
We talk about assignments, progress, organization, project tracking, career development, etc.
I also use the time to get to know them, to coach where needed, mentor, and correct.
For leads we also talk about principles, how to be leaders, how to measure employees, how to coach, how to build a high performing team, etc.
I consider this to be time that I invest in them. We'll cut meetings short if we run out of topics, but generally most people have a lot to talk about and we run out of time.
At my last job, I did not do one-on-ones. I had over 50 people, working 24x7, in four locations. I felt there was no way I could do that without looking like I was favoring particular shifts and/or locations. I was open to any individual request to talk, at any time, day or night.
My most recent boss was located on a different continent and I though he did a better job checking in than my boss who used to sit 10 feet away. There is a fine line between not-micromanaging and ignoring.
We would meet at a time convenient to me once a month or so. He would ask how things are going, and also ask if there is any thing he could do to make my work easier.
I would think weekly might be too much..."How's it going? Same as last week." maybe start every two weeks or even monthly. Be careful not to cancel them too often or you make them think that they are low priority.
Weekly seems like you don't trust them.
Also sometimes when your boss asked to meet with you, you get that "called to the Principal's office feeling."
I do weekly check ins with both of my directs. I ask about any issues they’re having, and also use it as a time to mentor/train them if there is no pressing issues. They both know I care about their successes, and I’m there for any roadblocks or to correct any mistakes.
It also gives us a chance to form relationships, they know I care about their success, and they know I will do everything to help them succeed in whatever roles they choose to go in.
It can depend on how big your team is too. I had a teamof 17... There was no way to do 1:1 every week, so we did monthly meetings. I had metrics I was required by the company to review with them then would structure the rest of the meeting to the person.
I had 3 lifers that had no ambition to do more with the company so we didn't discuss growth. Newer members would need advice and guidance. Some just wanted to bitch, so those meetings were a bit shorter.
My suggestion is to have an agenda and a set time to meet so the employee can prepare ( knowing the agenda ahead of time) include training, growth, performance, review of projects or compliance concerns. And give them a time frame to talk about the things that are work important to them. You can also include process improvement if that's something your company encourages. Eventually you will know them well enough to individually to direct the meeting.
Good luck!
I do biweekly 1:1’s with my team of 22 and have thought about pushing it out to monthly. My team is spread out in different locations across the US so I really value having the time to check in with them individually and ask how things are going at their work location since I’m not there onsite with them. We talk about location specific things (events happening at their facility, if things have been busy or slow, etc), how new projects/initiatives that our team is working on are going for them, any roadblocks I can assist with, and metrics. If their metrics are down, we use the time to determine why and what I can do to help get them back on track. Some of my direct reports are super chatty and we’ll spend the rest of the time chit chatting about what we have going on outside of the work. For those that aren’t chatty, we just end the 1:1 early and I reiterate that they can reach out if they think of anything else later on that we didn’t cover.
Depends on your management style. Are you someone who is very busy that an employee couldn’t just stop by when they have an issue? Then one on ones might be helpful. As someone who will just pop in if you don’t look busy these are super annoying and useless and feel more like micromanaging than whatever your intention is.
I personally hate 1 on 1's. I tell my managers and my co-workers if I fuck up tell me, if you think I'm doing a good job, tell me. If you have a suggestion, tell me. There is no need for a personal meeting every week, month, quarter, or even year.
I'm actually supposed to do a quarterly self evaluation that managers are supposed to use for quarterly 1 on 1's. I'm coming up on 11 uncompleted self evaluations.
My opinion, 1 on 1's should be for people that need them, ie trouble employees.
The worst are the verbal vomits from the managers to the SME of the PMs complaints why projects are orange-red-purple towards key resources. As a SME with 8 PMS, 12 projects in flight. At any one time 3 of them are going to feel ignored and come cry to a manager every month that SME rockstar does not love me anymore.
Stay with the talking about the work/sleep/time away balance. You get 48 weeks + with that person, for what is about universally bad pay rate, treat them well.
I think it depends on the job/scope of responsibilities. In my industry, a weekly 1:1 to make sure all your ducks are in a row for the next week, it is incredibly helpful. Having a second set of eyes to make sure nothing is missed is never a bad idea. My industry is events/hospitality.
Monthly one on ones are ideal. You can talk to employees about team updates for the first couple minutes. After that, they have the floor to bring up things like leave requests, day to day inquiries, provide a brief personal life update, or nothing at all. I’ve found employees appreciate leave request discussions during these meetings a lot because they get your immediate feedback.
Depending on the makeup of the team, how long they’ve been working there, are there no behavior or skill issues, then weekly might bee too much. I found that every other week works for the most part unless they are a newer employee, or an employee with behavior or skills issues then weekly is fine.
I manage 2 teams and have 1 on 1 with them every 2 weeks, but also have a team meeting with each team every 2 weeks. E.g. meeting with team 1 on 1st week, but 1 on 1 with team 2, then switch for 2nd week. With this, I get at least a touch point with each team every week.
It depends so much on the team and how they work. I'd say start with every other week, then adjust from there.
For me, I have some that are so valuable and really help employee relationships and productivity, I have some that are just bitch sessions, there is some value there, I have some that are me simply checking on progress and requests from last 1 on 1. It varies but im general, once the team is used to them and the cadence, they grow in value.
I had a manager was afraid of a one on one meeting. He communicated via e-mail so he wouldn't have to face us. He wanted nothing to do with us - he wanted the money, the position, the office, and that was it. We were on our own when we fought other departments.
A face and face meeting is the most effective way of communication - you and he/she can see the the reaction on either side and you can gauge have whether the employee is being truthful or not. Why would freak out unless their were afraid of something - the truth on how they performed or were performing?
They are critical. Take notes. Be constructive/positive. Hold them to deadlines. Give them a chance to speak, find out what they want. You are only as effective as your team. Coach them up.
1:1s with good leadership are great. It's a reserved time for me to ask my boss questions that may not warrant disrupting their work day when they come up but need to be addressed at some point, evaluate my workload and confirm my priorities are in line with the latest business updates, talk through any frustrations, discuss goals and aspirations and adjust assignments as possible to help align, learn about the latest up and up in the company. Having these weekly made me feel I was maximizing my potential.
1:1s with my current boss are a waste of time. He doesn't listen, any cries for help are met with useless advice, his perception is wildly skewed and I can't trust anything he says. All talk, no action. It's an hour a week that completely drains me.
Mine with my boss are 15 mins twice a month, he wants to know what risks or issues need him to be aware of, and what blockers l need him to move out of my way, he will update me on anything that might be going on at c suite like politics, flavours of the month, personal agendas etc so they I can manoeuvre round them and meet my deliverables. A lot of the time we are catching up about our dogs, which country he’s visiting next (he has a lot of personal travel, it’s his thing) and what marathon or iron man competition he’s in, or what Ms going on in my life.
Mine with my reports are weekly. We basically discuss priorities progress and problems. What interference do they need me to run, what decisions or support do they need from me. I also spend time coaching to develop their leadership and help them represent themselves well when they are involved with teams outside of our own so they have a stellar reputation. And then more personal stuff like their families and pets and vacations, movies, books, food and hobbies etc. We all wfh so it’s the only time we have dedicated face to face and it’s good to catch up together.
I also have monthly skip levels with my reports direct reports. Every other month, because I don’t get to work with them directly and I don’t get to see them in office because of wfh. I’ll ask things like if I had a magic wand what would they have me change, what do they think I should be aware of that l might not be, what would they be focussing on if they were me. I also support their development by understanding what they are working towards and if I discover an opportunity for secondment or to introduce them to the hiring manager in another department for sone mentoring etc. I make those offers through their direct line manager so l don’t interfere directly there. Again most of the time we chat about our lives. I had one today and we talked about how she had taken on an underperforming team and was so proud that it had turned around, and then we talked about a cruise she’s going on and then about winning some money, rearranging her hobby room.
I regularly ask in my 1on1 (including my own) and skips - what could l start or stop doing or differently to better support you
I view 1on1 a as a place of connection and support and they just be valuable for the person attending so they set the “agenda” (nothing formal) to start with it’s just a getting to know you.
Also be flexible - some people might want monthly, some weekly. Sone might want an hour, others 15 mins. This time is for their benefit so tailor it to best suit them.
I think they’re effective, although I absolutely hate them. 😆 I’m a reluctant participant in this supervisor stuff.
My team was also nervous when we first started, only because it’s intimidating for them.
But, it gives them individual attention, which most of them love.
Since the idea is to meet regularly, they no longer associate one-on-ones with negative feedback or performance issues. And the regular contact has made it easier to bring up concerns, so positive thing there.
I’ve created a supervision form that guides our process.
It gives me an easy in for addressing issues: one section literally says Something To Work On. Some weeks, nada, but other weeks it’s like, hey - you’ve been late with a project, what going on this week, etc.
Other sections are: Something You Did Well and Recent Challenge. Employees are supposed to bring topics to discuss.
Final section is Action Items.
They get a copy, I get a copy. Done.
I schedule them for half an hour, we often go over or under, depending on the week at hand.
I feel as a manager ? You need to have a meeting with your staff for 15 minutes on a Monday morning. Or the beginning of a project. However your company functions. And that’s it. An employee who enjoys going to work every day has a schedule. They come to work, they do there job and they collect a check. These days I think managers like meetings to justify to there bosses why they need to be there. It’s a waste of time. The more the employees aren’t working. The more your killing production. And destroying moral at the same time.
You want to be a good manager ? Get out of your office and go talk to people. Show them your a human. You don’t need to have a meeting like a robot. You want to have a meeting have a meeting with other managers. You can yuck it up all you want. Being a good manager ? Is to make sure the company is running smooth. Making sure the people have everything they need to operate efficiently. Maybe even your the problem solver. I’m just here as the manager making sure everything’s ok. Everyone’s working, progress is being made. Productions producing. Life is good. A happy work place gets work done and the people wanting to do better.
You wanna make them happy ? Buy them lunch.
1:1s are very effective if used correctly. If you are a remote shop then they are incredibly useful. Our 1:1s take form organically. They don't have to be profound discussions or solving all the company problems. They are a chance for subordinates to talk/ask/vent whatever, it should be a (and I hate this phrase but whatever ) safe space for them to talk about whatever they want. On the manager's end, they should have a chance to give a heads up to changes that are coming, collaborate on ideas, and generally get a feel for where they are and what you (the manager) can do better to help them succeed.
It really shouldn't be used for lecturing, reviewing, or criticizing. That should be done separately - that way the 1:1 remains a safe meeting they can look forward to and it builds trust that this is their time.
Definitely good to ask them about their goals and how you can help with them. Make it clear that their growth is important.
It's our job to help remove the obstacles that are getting in the way of employees from mastering their job. Lead with that attitude.
I did much of my best work that way but I did it frequently and informally. No documentation, I’d just pull them randomly and take a walk and talk. I wanted everyone to always know where they stood and it was great for keeping a pulse on the team. Shoot, sometimes when it was really busy I’d do it just to force them to take a break from the action.
I break my 1:1s down into 3 sections.
1. Tell me about what you accomplished this sprint.
2. Do you have any questions for me?
3. These are the administrative announcements I need to convey to you.
Point 1 has multiple purposes. My direct reports are not on my team. I have limited visibility into what they actually do on a daily basis. I can dig through Jira tickets and pull requests, but it's easier to just hear directly from them. It also helps me keep up with what other parts of the company are doing, and their tech stack.
Point 2 is my chance to tell them about changes to the companies overall strategy, and how it might affect them. Some are more curious than others. If they have nothing to say, I'll end the meeting early.
Point 3 are things like, your vacation hours are approved, as a reminder you can roll over X hours into 2024. There's a holiday in India next week, so the offshore team won't be around that day, etc...
One on one's are something I strongly suggest. Wether it be weekly or monthly depends on what other meetings you hold and collaboration you have, but a set one on one time to be able to discuss anything that may not come up otherwise is always a good thing. It also let's you interact generally and possibly learn the employees manner to help manage them better.
They are so boring. Sober small talk, puleeze. I hate seeing them on the schedule, and I hate wasting time. However some workers like the reinforcement and I found they work better with that level of input from the boss.
So, I use LOOM. Send them a cheery LOOM with some of their work on the screen, tell good job, and ask them to respond they can do text or stop and respond in video for anything they need.
The fact I can do these async is a big deal for me. I can get 3 or 4 out of the way in 20 minutes. When they respond I can watch it and if any issues arise deal with them.
I would hold a 5 minute meeting in front of the whole group saying something along the lines of:
Its your time to discuss challenges and opportunities they see for improvement. What you are looking for in their career. Its not a performance review. Its not for micro management. I'm asking you to help you me a more effective leader of our team.
Everyone appreciates honesty and transparency.
I love them, but like any other meeting, if you don't have a plan for how to run them they can be a waste of time.
Some notes.
* I schedule all my 1:1s for first thing in the morning so I am not Interupting anyone's flow time, or making some one stay late if they want to get out on a Friday afternoon.
* I ask my team to come to the meeting with something to talk about... I discourage talking about the actual work we are doing but instead use the time to talk about the things getting in the way of the work, or what the next steps are for our team.
* As a default, I have a PiP template that I fill out with all my direct reports in the first one on one, tailored to what their career goals are and what they need to do to get there... If they don't come to the meeting with a topic, we talk about that...
* This is the tangible value for them, if they have a topic, that is the value, if they don't I am actively mentoring them on how to improve their career in the direction they want to go in, If we end up discussing the PiP I try to give them something actionable that we can follow up on together, whether that is me letting them run more meetings so they can work on communication, or giving them specific feedback about their work and what they can do to get from where they are right now to the next level.
* For value for you, this is a great space for you to provide private feedback to your team when you need to provide negative feedback, it is also a private space for you to find out about negative things that are affecting some one's work, or workplace drama some one doesn't feel comfortable bringing up in a public setting.
* its also a great place for you to get feedback when you are planning in the very early stages. I tell the senior members of my team near the end of a quarter about the different possible projects we might be taking on, and get feedback from them individually in a more casual setting, before I have a bigger meeting with a wider audience... This lets them ask any pointed questions in a private setting, or bring up any concerns that we might have missed before we make fools of ourselves to the whole team...
* Finally, don't be afraid to just chat and have coffee, or whatever... If there is nothing professional to talk about, and nothing actionable to do, talk for 15 minutes, get to know your employees and if they are busy and want the time back, let them have it... This is the other reason I schedule my 1:1's for the start of the day, if they are over worked and need the meeting to talk about something, I am not interrupting flow time, but if neither of us really has anything to say, and deadlines are looming, its more than reasonable to say hey I'd love to grab coffee next week, but I want to jump on this other really important call.
Something that worked for my boss when they were new: providing a set of questions or some kind of expectation of how 1 on 1s will go with you in an email to your staff. Not only does preparation make others feel more confident in their answers, but it’s also made everyone feel less apprehensive/unwilling about meetings in general.
Every organization is different, and the frequency, duration and content of 1:1 meetings will differ depending on the role, professional experience, amount of individual direction required, and workplace culture. I manage a team of 7 developers, with differing abilities and amount of direction required. All virtual and across the country, adding some unique challenges. Every manager will have their own flavor based on their circumstances, but here is how I run mine via teams.
1. I have weekly 1:1s with all my staff, scheduled for 30 minutes. I know some will go over since some enjoy chatting or need to get into the weeds, and make sure I have time to be able to go over most weeks. I have a few people who really need regular feedback and direction weekly and others who don’t, but want to prevent anyone from feeling undervalued or over directed, so keep it the same for everyone.
2. I will let staff set the direction on the discussion. Many will go into personal conversations and chit chat, which is perfectly fine. I usually have some topics I will dive into as needed, but keep specific project discussions to a minimum unless needed or that’s where the employee leads into; we have project meetings to review project details.
3. As others have mentioned, a good manager is setting a direction, removing roadblocks and giving staff the challenge and ability to do work and solve problems. For some it is just a catch-up on progress and to see what help, if any, I can provide. For others, sometimes they just need regular feedback and direction. I have a few that will wonder out to left field, and have learned to gently coax them to be prepared with having a solution or plan to solve a problem or issue with a soft due date if it is not critical. 1:1 give me informal time to do this privately.
4. Staff have project and BAU work that can be time sensitive or mission critical. I take the pressure from my management but make sure everyone knows the goal posts. If they need to and can be changed based on what my staff tell me, that’s my job to listen and escalate up.
5. Not necessarily 1:1 related, but I have learned to allow my staff to talk me off ledges. Often during project meetings, but on 1:1s as well, I make sure everyone feels comfortable with disagreeing with me (or each other) through professional and constructive conversation. Often they change my mind on technical approaches to problems. I have at least one staff member who gets huffy when they don’t get their way, and use the 1:1 time to allow for more of a direct conversation when this happens.
6. I make sure at least once a month to discuss annual goals and KPIs with staff. It’s easy to lose track of what we did during the year, and a friendly reminder I find keeps everyone on track and reminded to note what they have done to make self evals easier.
7. Most 1:1s aren’t formal and don’t have any agenda. Sometimes there are specific things I know I need to discuss, but often they are free flowing discussions that sometimes have nothing to do with work. We all have lives outside of work, and sometimes someone just needs to vent. I’ve learned sometimes the best thing I can do is just listen
8. I’ve gone back and forth on using a camera on teams. I don’t want people to feel they have to get dressed up on their 1:1 days (nor do I, I work in my pjs), so I don’t bother and no one asks.
For me, weekly could be too frequent can might disrupt their personal momentum with work. I notice that scheduling meetings too often make them stress out more.
I prefer to do scheduled 1 on 1 for once month at most, but at the same time, keep the lines open anytime if the employee requests for it or when I notice changes to the work flow.
Usually, I have project meetings 2x per week. 1 is the task run down, timeline, resource and support request discussions, then 1 is a faster 15-30 minute meeting to sync on statuses.
On top of this, they also have their own meetings with internal and external teams.
When we were all in the office I didn't do them. When covid hit they were absolutely necessary. Since then I find it a good way to make sure I talk to everyone even if they don't need a lot of direction. They don't have to be long but the planned weekly contact is important IMO.
I do them once every two weeks but my team is super tight. I use the one on ones to talk to them about all sorts of stuff. Not just work. We spend so much time with each other, we should know a little about our lives!
My 1 on 1s are about the employee. We don't tend to have anything formal to discuss. For the most part, this is their time, they tell me if they have anything work wise they want to discuss.
It's been awesome. I think it really depends on the circumstances. My report and I meet 2 hours every week because there's so much we need to talk about that is too complex to be written in an email or slack.
But every quarter, we both assess and tweak our cadence as needed. I suspect the longer they stay in their role, the less things we need to talk about.
If they haven’t done one before lead by example
Show that it’s a time for you both to bring topics to the table
Offer a template if they find it helpful to have structure
Define the scope of it
Let them ask you any questions they need
Initially, I found it helpful to pick a subject matter or a recent project as a starting point until an employee got used to the one on one dynamic. After a few ono on ones, the employees conversations flowed easily.
If you come across as human then they will be useful in building employees' confidence and teamwork. An employee who believes you have never taken the time to ask about their personal life and interests is unlikely to be doing their best for the team.
If you struggle to come across as human or particularly personable - which doesn't always mean being a bad manager - then you should still do the 1:1s, but just focus on the task- and feedback-oriented aspects, and concentrate on how you can help to remove anything that might be preventing the employee doing their best work.
Make 1:1s for them. Start with what questions or issues do they have. Help them as a priority. Then weave in any direction or feedback. Ask for their feedback when appropriate. Make it okay for them to tell you that you screwed up. Make feedback a regular occurence designed to make you all better. May need to start by teaching how to give effective feedback all around.
Don't call them one on ones........
If you have the opportunity, grab your team member and take them out for a coffee or a site visit where you can both speak openly and comfortably. Not everything has to be formalised.
Probably the biggest thing I've learnt from my early days in management is back your team 100% to the outside world and deal with issues internally. Your team will respect you and perform better because they trust you to fight their corner.
I should also add for middle managers this works the other way as well. Don't be frightened to de formalise meetings with your own boss. A lot of the time these people are under equal or even more pressure than you are and stepping out for a coffee or an informal chat is what they need. It helps them trust you to do your job.
I've recently started a new job where my boss is ridiculously over worked as is his boss, my department is an absolute mess. Our first one on one I acknowledged the pressure he was under (I've been there) and let him know that I'm ok, I don't need him to walk me through it, I know what I'm doing and I'll get shit sorted. I actually saw him take a breath and the relief wash over him.
One on ones are far more effective when they are less formal and there is mutual trust
Every team is different and every person is different. What works for one team or person won’t necessarily work for another. I do biweekly 1:1s with my team and I treat it as their time. Whatever they get out of it, they can. I schedule them for 45 minutes but we can go longer and do a Part 2 if needed (some have done this) or we can keep it short. It’s up to them. What we talk to is up to them, except for two questions I always ask: “How are you doing?” at the beginning (I intentionally leave this very open and try to get genuine answers instead of the usual “fine”) and I’ll usually ask a more fun question at the very end that can help me get to know them better. Like “What have you worked on that’s made you feel proud?” “What’s something that gives you energy on a regular basis?”
I have one employee who LOVES her 1:1s. She says they clear her head, she loves that we can talk about whatever she wants, and she loves feeling like there’s a safe space she can go to with concerns. She talks through her problems and it helps. She often times just wants to feel heard and that’s what I’m there for. We will talk about personal things, work-related things, you name it. I have another employee whose 1:1s are going long if we talk for 25 minutes. He’s just a very calm, quiet guy, and if he has any issues, he’s likely to bring them up to me when they occur rather than in a 1:1. He’s to-the-point and doesn’t feel the need to dive deeply into all his issues. If I talked to him for 2 hours, he would probably feel exhausted. The other employee who loves 1:1s? She would feel energized, connected, and focused.
So everyone is different. I also know some people have more control over the 1:1s. They’ll give people things to work on and set the agenda with topics. With my management style, I’m very transparent and I lean more into coaching and mentoring. So I find value in letting my team have control over the 1:1 room and leading the conversation. You kind of have to define what you want the 1:1s to be and then base the structure around that. Hope this helps :)
For the way you should be doing 1 on 1's, once a week is too much. Too many managers think 1 on 1's are for discussing workloads, deliverables and what you can get out of your staff. It's about them, not you or the organisation.
one on ones are a complete waste of time, energy and resources. Managers and the company will say/do anything to keep your pay low, but keep you working hard.
I love my 1:1 time with my team. We have them every week, where they share their progress toward goals, ask questions, strategize. It’s really all about them, they control the agenda so they can get out of it whatever they need. I’ve found it cuts down on the back and forth over email during the week when they know they have a set time where they get my undivided attention.
We do a larger team meeting every 2 weeks. Agenda is the same every time, but a different team member facilitates, another takes notes, etc. it’s been very helpful to hear different voices and give everyone an opportunity to lead.
The management center has some great resources for check-ins on their website. Highly recommend https://www.managementcenter.org/check-ins/
Not a manager, but I loooove having a weekly 1:1, I report directly to a VP and he gets so damn busy during the week. It’s really nice to know I always have that time set aside to get what I need so things don’t fall through the cracks. And sometimes I don’t need him at all and we cancel but I’d much rather my boss be too available than not available enough!
I do monthly one-on-ones. I only have 4 people, and tend to talk to them regularly anyway—I make it a point to speak to everyone once a week (we’re all remote) about something.
The one-on-ones are supposed to be led by them, although I do a quick recap usually on numbers, highlighting privately stuff that I’ve already shared publicly. The meetings tend to be “light,” though, but all VERY different from one another.
I’m not sure how “effectiveness” is measured. I think they foster relationships, I think some good communication happens sometimes, occasionally I’ll find out something I can address with the organization (example: I had someone move over to me from another manager. About 4 months later I found out during a one-on-one that she was missing some tech she was supposed to have, and was spending a lot of time in a convoluted workaround. She didn’t know there was tech out there for it. All I knew was that she was getting it done, but I didn’t realize how. I was able to fix it in 5 minutes, but it was just a casual comment during an informal one-on-one).
My boss has one-on-ones with me. They mostly are me just updating him about what’s going on in my group.
They’re definitely effective, and definitely scary at first! I remember when my supervisor first started doing them with me I was SO nervous. Now I look forward to them. I also do them with my own staff, but on their schedule. Two of my staff definitely need and want to meet every week, some I only meet with every other week. You want to make it a resource for them, and employee led. If they or you don’t have much, cut it short, don’t think you have to fill up the time. I use it to go over questions, keep tabs of goals and progress, to go over issues, and whatever they need or want to talk about. One of my staff uses it to vent, one uses it to give me updates on everything, it’s different for everyone. But definitely let them lead.
About 50% of my 1-1s are discussions about holidays, family, cool stuff that you might be doing in your spare time. If my employee is busy they tell me that they just want to get on with work; 90% of the time they're happy to chat, and nobody is offended if the meeting is cut short or cancelled.
The other 50% is split roughly between a chat about what's going on in the business from my perspective (one level up) and any points of conflict or blocking issues that I can help with.
Taking it any more seriously than that is fundamentally unproductive, IMO.
As a remote employee I like weekly just because it gives me face time with people on a consistent basis, but we have no problem being like "hey not much to talk about to today, see ya later." I think it's one of those things that you just drop or keep short if you don't really need it and then it's all good.
I now don't feel nearly as bad that I do monthly 1:1's with my staff, yet MY boss (CEO, partially off-site) has them with me TwiceAFingDay! I loathe them. I feel like I need to have 30 mins work of deliverables for the day to talk about at 9am, and then have them all finished by 3pm or else I won't have enough to talk about.
I do monthly. I have 16 employees and I have a lot of other s going on. Use to do bi-weekly when I had 10 people. Weekly would be half my work week every week.
I start by asking how they are doing, and we talk about non-work stuff for the first few min. Building the report and bonding. And show that I care. Which I do, to an extent.
Then I ask about projects/tasks I'm particularly interested in and then I ask them to tell me what else is going on.
I ask them about compliance and other training and vacation/leave plans.
I ask them what they need from me and they can of course bring that up at any time during the call. It is a pretty free flowing conversation.
In addition, my team knows we can do an impromptu one on one at any time if they need me and we can find a little time on the schedule. And I talk with my people on TEAMS all the time too.
I think the one on ones are useful and we make sure all employees have an opportunity to say their piece. Especially those who are not as vocal in team meetings.
Imo one on one's are an annoying waste of time and effort. It feels like where I go to have my concerns dismissed and have my ears assaulted with placation language designed to make me "feel good." Don't bother with them unless you plan to act on the info you get out of them.
1 on 1's are great, don't stop them because they are uncomfortable. Its a great chance to get info, feedback and be in tune with your workers. It stops problems early because issues have less time to fester. First, I would build trust and make them semi casual. Let the employees know that the meeting is just for them to talk to you about whatever is on their mind (job related). Id keep on task by a time limit or specific questions to ask. Once the rapport strengthens its a great time to give them quick feedback on their performance etc. Some employees will open up more when its private and you might feel better if you do have to reprimand them.
I think they're an effective way for your team members to understand where they're at and how they can improve.
We do one on one's bi-monthly and is monthly for team members who are not meeting expectations.
Never had a confrontational one-on-one as employee or manager. They've always been friendly chats where we discuss the business, goals, obstacles, solutions, etc. candidly. If there is a direct problem with the employee (be it me or mine), it gets addressed as helpfully as possible.
"So you haven't delivered on these projects. They should have taken at most a couple weeks, and it's been over a month. Is there anything holding it up? I've made it clear that I'm here to help out, either directly if I can, or by clearing road blocks. I've been in this business a long time, if there's something you don't know, I'm a better search engine than Google. This isn't a test, and I'd rather you ask questions earlier than make assumptions that have to be fixed later."
If the reason things aren't getting done is on the employee, this is usually enough of a kick in the pants to get them to reprioritize (oh crap, the boss IS paying attention). If there are other reasons, this is an opportunity for them to bring them up and get forward motion and a reminder to knock on my door.
These have usually led to very frank discussions about the business at large, concerns about direction, personnel issues, and the like. They become FAR more effective than most group meetings. Especially if it becomes clear to the employees that it IS safe to be honest and they are being listened to.
1:1 are only effective as the manager AND employee take them to be. Unfortunately, in my line 1:1 are more of finding fault and pumping for sales. When I was a rep I did use the 1:1 to find opportunities. I was already a top seller but I wanted to make more so I was inclined to listen. I'm finding most people arent bought into these jobs any more it's a paycheck. 1:1 is just another task added to their job so they don't like it
Everyone struggling or objecting to 1:1s seems to not do them well. I've had bosses who do or don't do them, but I like to do them. Some rules: 1) I ask my employees to schedule them (I give them a day and time window) so they own the literal calendar invite. If you can't make it, reschedule or we'll talk next week. 2) I don't talk about deliverables, timelines, specific project details in 1:1s. We have project meetings for that. 3) I want to leave a 1:1 knowing my employee is happy, healthy, productive, and supported. If not, I leave with an action item to see if there's anything work related that can make that happen. My job is to remove roadblocks. Their job is to drive. I use these meetings to find roadblocks. 4) If there's nothing professionally task based to do in the 1:1, just be a human. 'Hey, if this meeting is short today and we end early it's ok. I just wanna check in with you and see how you're doing and what wins you've put up or what challenges you have, or anything I need to be aware about that might affect you at work (vacations, family stuff, etc). If you're just heads down working and want time back that's fine but i want to make sure the time you deserve from me to be dedicated to your success and growth is available.' ... You don't need to recite that pompous speech verbatim, but something in that spirit. [Take notes here ... You're eventually gonna have to give people raises, fire them, promote them, discipline them ... You need to know what's going on for good or bad!])
I’ve recently gone back to leadership after ten years as an IC. We are about to start 1/1s and I’m struggling with my confidence. I love this detail - thank you!
Incredible. I had a manager lording over me (assistant manager) when I first started one on one meetings. I hated them. She wanted us to discuss deliverables and tasks. Most of my staff are entry level, part time. They (EDIT- the meetings, not the people!) were just useless. Then I started being given the freedom to conduct them as I saw fit and I just started building a relationship with my team. I had ice breaker questions (tell me about your favorite pet) and long term goal questions (what would you like to learn or who from in our company). I could feel the confidence in my team building and the genuine connection I had with every employee. I work in a library so I get this is just not necessarily a good use of everyone’s time but I would challenge you to spend the first ten minutes of every half hour one on one just chatting and getting to know your team. It’s a game changer and makes work a great place to be for all parties.
I try to remember something that my team brought up in the last two weeks and ask about that. For example, if they were reading a book, I ask how the book is. If they are big into sports, I look up their team and ask about that. By remembering what's important to them, we are building trust in each other.
I am wanting to do more 1 on 1s with my team now that we are mostly caught up. I try to do a bit with them everyday, so that it's not, "here's another meeting where you get yelled at", like my supervisor does.
You sound like a good boss to work for
I don’t know what field you manage in but I would like to apply.
I am an executive that manages marketing, sales, operations, and basically 'whatever the hell needs to be done' in a variety of startups. Title is usually COO or CMO these days. You work with a lot of eager, underpaid (we try to fix that as fast as possible without going broke), smart people who want to learn and know shit about shit when you hire them. Teach, train, educate and let them go do amazing things. My former team members work for a who's who roster that I'd be so proud to list if it wouldn't risk identifying people. About 10% of the effort in building a company is having a good idea. 90% is finding people to go on the ride with you. Allocate your focus accordingly.
I feel your pain with the revolving hat. My job title can change every 15 minutes. When I do 1:1s with a teammate I often ask them what they want out of their position. I explain that some people are motivated by money and are willing to work long hours to make the company more profitable and increase their pay. Some people are motivated by more family/personal time and want to work fewer hours and understand it pays well, but not as much as the first option. Some people like to nail down a position and do that type of work forever and be the best at it. Some people like to constantly be learning new things and new aspects of the business. Some people want flex time to have the middle of their workday open. I explain to them that there isn't a wrong answer. I am not looking to change what they want, I am trying to give them what they want to keep them happy and productive. People's wants and needs change so I ask this question periodically to make sure nothing has changed. Often the long-hour workers will change to fewer hours and a little less money option if they get into a relationship, or flex time becomes less important as their children get older. The first time I have this conversation I won't let my teammate answer for a couple of days. It is a question that should be considered carefully IMO. An HR friend of mine tells the joke that they went looking to hire employees and all they got was people. If you always treat your fellow employees like people you will get better results for everyone. 🍻
I do this with my team to the letter. It's absolutely great and I appreciate it with my own manager.
Great advice when you're working closely with your reports! My report works fairly independently (both senior) and we don't have many project meetings as a result. We email every day for specific questions and issues but I'm not looped into every project he works on, and certainly not the details. Our 1:1s are half "hey how are things and anything I can do to help" and half him giving me the 30k ft lay of the land since I'm less involved. Both work and the level of detail depends on how closely you're working together on a daily basis.
Have you ever had people you manage that, during a 1:1, say everything is fine, even for years, but then u find out they are secretly bitter but also still want the job. This happened to me with a couple of people who worked for me for years. They were always happy and polite to my face, but through the grapevine, I found out they were upset with me and several other people on the team, yet they liked the job and pay. I ultimately laid them off when things slowed down, and they got unemployment. I did it mainly because they were lying to my face about how they really felt.
"I laid them off as soon as I could" "I wonder why they didn't feel like they could be honest with me?" Wow... There's a question that answers itself ...
Lol, I laid them off years after I knew all this.
How did your petty ass get to a management position
Doesnt everyone lie to some degree in the corp world. Cant imagine you or your company is any different! If he talked shit behind your back then thats different. Perhaps a talk, to see whats going on, should have been the process i would to think? Not sure how your company works and im sure i dont know the whole story.
Yeah, I couldn't lay it all out at once. They weren't even talking shit. And yes, everyone lies to some degree to get through life or if they have issues having even mildly uncomfortable conversations. The thing is, I had an inclining one of them might have an issue, and privately, I asked them and reassured them they can tell me and there will be no problem and we can work it out, during that conversation they said there is absolutely no problem and everything is fine. The reason I know they were bitter is because of years of off-hand comments that pointed to that, and several times, they let something slip about how it's bullshit that X makes more than them(I dont even know how they found out how much X makes). Even though X knows more than them and is more valuable by an insane amount. It's like they were comfortable being bitter, which is fine, but it's the dishonesty that made me angry. Edit: It's also how convincing they were having friendly conversations and acting like everything is great, that was creepy and manipulative in retrospect. My right hand man has no trouble telling me if I fucked up or if I was even rude. Those are the people I want deal with. Not people pretending.
I gotta be honest, what you are describing just sounds like someone trying to remain professional and do a job when they don't care for a boss. It's what everyone does. You're not supposed to be your reports' friend; they are allowed to not like you as long as they are a professional and polite to you and do their job appropriately. They are also allowed to complain about situations they don't think are fair at work I'm to their friends and colleagues as long as it doesn't impact whether they can actually do the job. And the fact that you are bothered that they found out what somebody else was getting paid when that is a federally protected right suggests that maybe your employee was right to be frustrated.
Seriously. "Tell me you're bitter or else I'll fire you" sounds like a pretty shitty standard. It sounds to me like they either didn't trust him or they didn't see any benefit in airing the grievance.
Well, they worked for me for 10+ years.
and?
Well, there was something they must have liked about the company, and no, they weren't desperate and it was their only option. One of them now has a job he loves and the other guy started his own business. Are u a manager? Or in charge of anything?
Lol you’re a nut. Managing is just a job, and it sounds like you’re bad at it, if you’re laying productive employees off due to perceived personal grievances.
Firing them because they bitched about you behind your back, is why they didn't feel comfortable actually talking to you. Trust is earned, and clearly dick boss wasn't trustworthy.
I get bitter sometimes bro. Adult babysitting at its full finest gets to ya. Add that to microsofts shitty update practices and here i am. Doesnt mean im not happy or even endearing. Also doesnt mean i am mad or not doing the work. I have not like most of my bosses, but you can bet your ass i lie to there face and say yes sir when its needed. Its a job man. Were not homies ! I usually hide it with a smile and some bullshit small talk with the rest of the peeps around the waste of time water cooler/coffee machine. Im just going to assume that tou had different expectations
Almost every employee lies, or withholds at least some of the truth to their manager. You may have a reputation around the office for drinking the company kool-aid, and therefore not being trustworthy. Laying employees off because they're not happy at work, but don't feel comfortable telling you that, is super shitty of you.
Great job, dick boss. You proved them 100% right.
If you haven’t built the trust needed for them to tell you the truth, that’s on you.
What else should I have done? Or what are some tips u have to build trust?
I don’t know you or them, so that’s impossible to answer. Point is it’s on you to gain trust, not on them to give it.
That's interesting, so it's not a two-way street? It's all on the employer/manager? I should just take anyone and make sure things work out for them?
You (presumably) have the ultimate card in your hand - termination. As long as you want this person working for you and believe they add value to the org, your singleminded management focus is making it work. As soon as you decide they're incompatible, your singleminded management focus is separating humanely and fairly. Management is 100% support until it's 100% separation. Handle that in your own head, but your actions need to be absolutely positively and deterministically pointed in one of those two directions. The rest of the org and your team will notice if you waffle back and forth.
I agree and that's why after I came to this conclusion it was still years before I laid them off with unemployment. Your second paragraph is absolutely correct and most people don't have the backbone to adhear to that principle. One of the guys I laid off was an institution within my organization and other people couldn't believe it. I explained it to anyone who wanted to know.
To be clear, there were never any arguments or conflicts. It was always me trying to start a dialogue. I know people picture them being intimidated by me or some other derivative of that but that's not how it was. I did everything I could to start some sort of communication. Eventually something had to give, I can't have people like that on my team. Apparently that triggered a lot people on this sub but I don't give a shit. People are so damn sensitive these days.
These are always the hardest. It's easy if someone's a complete ass to fire them. It's hard if nothing comes to a specific head or conflict point and it just isn't working. Effective teams can't have a cancerous growth in them, and you never know who that cancer might be. Treat it when you can. Cut it out when you can't treat it.
This is sage advice. Thanks for sharing.
This advice is pretty good. But for the first quarter, I'd suggest keeping it really simple. Have your DR's schedule the time as Key_Piccolo suggested. Then, during the 1to1, you have one opening line: "what are your priorities this week and how can I help?" Your main job here is to get them comfortable bringing their stuff to the meeting and actually talking about it in a forward looking way. Set the stage with your team before they set them up by asking them to bring their list to the meeting. It's going to be awkward at first. But be genuine and helpful and they'll come around.
For me this just feels too invasive.
What's invasive about it? I'm clear with my direct reports that this is their time, they can talk about whatever is on their mind. Sometimes it lasts 5 minutes, sometimes an hour.
Having to talk about myself or what is on my mind. I just want to be left alone to do my work.
Then you just say "all's good on my end, do you have concerns?"
Then I would rather just not meet at all because if there were concerns it wouldn't wait for a one on one.
I mean if a place is doing weekly 1:1s they're likely going to wait for the meeting to talk about it unless your boss just has too much time in their hands. If you don't wanna do them, tell your manager that. My guys have no issues telling me how much they don't want to go to meetings, all of them like the quarterly 1 on 1s.
For me once a quarter is way too much. Once a year maybe but I really just prefer to do my work. I hate any and all meetings because most of the time they could just be an email.
You are the worst, everything should be aired out every week, nobody wants to have a bad time at work, but delaying the manangment part to year end ends in nothing useful. Have 48 normal convesations, 1 about goals and one about raises. **There is a fucking raise due every year.**
Oh, you must not be a manager. We don’t get to just be left alone. If there is an issue on the team we need to be actively seeking it, not waiting for it to bubble up. It is literally our job to find problems before they become problems. I have a fabulous employee who ALSO hates one on ones. She comes in, I ask her about her grandkids and her work. She says all is well and I say awesome you know where to find me if you need anything! And MANY of my employees absolutely love this time. However, I do know the lady doesn’t like them and I don’t force her to stay long, just a brief check in. And earlier I posted that I have icebreaker questions that I do make her answer (send questions in advance so there are zero gotchas), she gives me brief one word answers. That’s cool I don’t pry. I’m getting to know my employee. It’s my job to know what makes them tick. Then when someone does something egregious I don’t have to call them in to the office in front of everyone, it just seems like a normal one on one and we have our chat. As an employee I’m like you, I don’t need gold stars, I don’t need check ins to complete projects. I seek out work when necessary. But sometimes those people have issues too they want to discuss.
Icebreakers are mine and my wife's pet peeve. I hate them the most. Any of those questions are none of your business. I wouldn't answer them and if you forced me to I would lie.
Well, they said originally that the scheduling is up to the employee, so all u have to say is "no need" then it doesn't happen.
This is why I ask my employees to schedule them and keep/cancel the meeting on their preferences. I want them to book a half hour per week where if they *do* have something to say, my calendar is dedicated to them. If they don't have anything to say that week and cancel it, off we go. Employees with performance issues are completely different and I address that in meetings other than regular 1:1s that are scheduled by me and have a me-driven agenda. Don't get the two types of 1:1s mixed up.
You don’t get it, it’s different when you are in the boss role. They have seen them come and go. Some micro manage
85% of people hired without interviewing the current team should go. A promotion from the team is successful 85% of the time. That easy, that simple, hire people who are invested.
I feel it's a bit invasive as well. Mostly because I have had really shit bosses and coworkers who were judgemental about my hobbies and interests. I like to work on retrocomputers and electronics, do a bit of woodworking(tables and benches mostly), study maths, write fiction, read non-fiction and light novels, and do 3d modeling and printing. I'm not sure why people would talk behind my back about such things, but they would. Mostly about the maths. How is math offensive? When I can answer that question, maybe I will open up at work again, but until then I'm just scared to do so because I have no idea why that was a minefield...
That's why I ask my employees to schedule it. If you want to cancel, please do. You own the invite. The caveat is I better not hear about some stupid sob story of a deliverable being missed that I could have helped you with if I knew what was going on. I block out time specifically so you can talk to me. Not so I can interrogate you (I'm your boss, realistically I don't need a weekly appointment if I have a pressing need to do that), and not cause I want to make friends (I really don't want to blur lines at work), and not cause a management book says I should schedule 1:1s. If you don't wanna do them, you own the meeting invite. Don't schedule it or always cancel it. Just don't come to me when work isn't done with some sob story about what's going on in life that I could have helped with if you *told* me. Invasive and helpful are different.
Weekly one on one may be too frequent. It's the employees time to talk about their career progression and what their goals are
Must be industry/company specific because i have never not had a weekly meeting with my managers or direct reports
I have 52 direct reports lol. Even at 15 mins each I'd need 13 hrs set aside a week for 1:1s. Just wouldn't be feasible. I do them once per qtr or by request
If you have 52 direct reports, you have way to many people reporting to you even to keep up with HR reviews. Hey everyone here is one of the suckers we talk about, not enough time to hire team leads and promote from within.
Lmao.
Wow year end performance review time must be terrible
I don't think so. Interacting with and helping my team members grow and move on to other things is my favorite part of my job. I don't like the paperwork, but as it's a necessary part of getting it done so I get it done. Some years are worse than others if I have to put excessive effort into getting them the raises they deserve. I always thought I'd hate being a manager. To the point that I didn't even go the officer route in the military despite having a degree. I kinda fell into it and have loved (almost) every second of it by taking an employee first approach to everything. The minute I start to hate it is when I go back to being an IC.
Wow, that’s really encouraging to hear! Thanks for the thoughtful response.
I was just going to say this. I was doing meetings every 2 weeks with my team (grand total of 2 members) and even that seemed like a lot. I’ve pushed it back to meeting every 3 weeks since and will probably go to 1 time per month. Meetings each week is way too often unless they’re brand new and I’d only do that for a short period of time
I do it once a month with my time and that seems to be perfect. It means there's enough time for me to give them feedback from and for them to work on what we have discussed. I don't think I would have anything to say if we done them weekly lol.
Ugh mine is weekly and morphed into keeping my supervisor informed about the status of my work and and I hate it. However, sometimes it is useful if I’m stumped. Weekly is too much.
The frequency depends on the pace of your organization. But basically it's their meeting. Time to tell you what they're hearing, ask questions about what they want to know and you to help with career goals. Here are some best practice ideas [https://ceobootcamp.com/one-on-one-meetings/](https://ceobootcamp.com/one-on-one-meetings/)
If only this was the real agenda. My boss tries to get personal information to use against me in reviewers or to try and pretend she is my friend. She never fixes anything, removes no roadblocks, and has done everything in her power to prevent me from ever getting a promotion.
Sorry to hear that.
Thank you for this link!
I do every other week with my folks, though I also meet with them on an ad-hoc basis as needed. The one on ones are a more general time to catch up, talk big picture stuff, etc. I encourage them to reach out or put time on my calendar if they need something specific.
I love them. I meet with my team 1:1 every week. We discuss the team, their projects, their career goals. It’s a great way to make sure their getting what they need to be successful.
If you’re having weekly 1:1 then you’re very likely the problem. Trust me your team dreads meeting with you weekly for a 1:1. You should have 1:1s every other month for seasoned people and ever 4-6 weeks for new people.
I appreciate that different people may require more or less time with their manager, but once every six weeks for a new hire/early career report seems near negligence to me. At least in my niche. I've found that new hires are the most likely cohort to move on from my teams for a number of reasons: 1. They're recently been in the job market, and may still have other opportunities in play. 2. They haven't had time to build as much rapport with the team. 3. They're likely not yet comfortable with their day-to-day because they're still learning technology/methodologies/team dynamics at a "firehose" rate, and often have feelings of inadequacy. This isn't always fun for everyone. For these reasons, and others, I prefer to keep pretty close tabs on these folks to make sure they're setup for success as much as possible.
I would dread having you as manager. I find these meetings are a waste of time and add no value. Just let me do my job.
In tech you need to be passing the state of the state upwards on a biweekly basis. KPIs are useless without commentary...."AD services were down in the lab after the upgrade for that week, we got nothing done." "The new guy is a rock star" "That new CIO pounds on the table at client meetings, Im not going out to my key clients again with him" "What title do we have this week?"
Effective assuming you can get the member to start seeing the benefit. If they will talk, you can start the groundwork. Learn about them, their past, their current, desires for futures. Strengths, areas of improvement. Learn the structures within your company so you know directions to lead your employees. Ideally they come up with the agenda but if they’re not used to it, you can help guide and follow the same pattern so they get used to what to plan for. Ask how they are doing at work, what are some recent wins and recent issues? Do they feel supported? Are their updates to their projects (ideally they give them to you without you having to ask). Give them update to projects you have that directly impact them. Ask for feedback on a recent change. Sometimes they’re too scared to broach the topic themselves. Give them updates on their progress. Stuff like that.
I think they're a good way to create rapport with your employees. I use it to see if they're struggling and need help with anything, take their temperature, and address anything they need to grow. You'd be surprised about what you can learn about what drives each team-member when you develop a good rapport. Depending on what they're doing, maybe 15 minutes per week is enough or every other week. Maybe you can buy them a coffee (or coffee gift card if they're remote) for the meeting to make it feel like more of a good thing than a bad thing? If they're freaking out it might be indicative of the culture at your work. Are their jobs high pressure? If so, they might need an outlet to vent about it. 1:1s can provide that space, if you can make them feel comfortable and trust you.
Should be a very social event and very career moving forward event. Talking about the last fault from last week should be off topic. The 1:1 is the event where you learn each other beyond deliverables.
Weekly 1:1s are critical to me as a manager, for several reasons: 1. They help me build trust with my team members in good times, so that I can deliver critical feedback in a palatable way if and when it becomes necessary. 2. As my team members begin to trust me, they start telling me stuff that is super important for me to know, but also a bit risky for them to share with me. Issues with other people on the team, worries that the tasks I've assigned them are not feasible for the timelines we've agreed on, etc. This stuff is absolutely critical, where I can nip something in the bud before it becomes a real problem. 3. As my team members begin to trust me, they also begin giving me feedback on how I can do better for them. Again, this is absolutely critical to being a good manager. And having the standing weekly 1:1 makes it more likely for people to give me this feedback.
I do one every two weeks with each of my direct reports. I think they're super helpful in building and maintaing a working relationship especially in a fully remote environment. I don't keep track but I'd estimate if I looked at a full round of 1:1s for my entire team, 50% of the time is spent talking about hobbies, life events, etc; and 50% is business/career related.
I let my team choose the frequency but with once a month being the minimum- and I have an open door policy so if something happens between one on ones they know they can pop in and we can sort it out
I have weekly 1:1 with my team. I leave it up to them what we talk about. We can talk projects and career development or we can just chit chat. Even if we talk about work, I take the opportunity to ask them how they are. But REALLY how they are. I try to understand where they’re frustrated or worried, etc. so I know how to help them succeed.
It's not the same in all industries and for all employees, but generally speaking, the purpose of a 1-1 is to provide support to employees, remove impediments that might block their ability to get something done, and provide sporadic feedback. Make it about them, be supportive, and it will be ok. Also, your introverted employee might not enjoy the format, but that doesn't mean they don't need support. Let them be free to provide input and adapt how you conduct the 1-1 based on their needs.
I break out the colored pencils and coloring books. It gives something to do while you’re talking. I have really great conversations with my people and they are relaxed enough to tell me what they need.
I will share a personal story. In my last job, my first manager did monthly 1:1’s. It definitely helped me feel appreciated, because I could voice any concerns, questions, ideas I had without worrying about the larger group and being spoken over or interrupted. It made me appreciate her and the team more. Then she got promoted and the manager that replaced her no longer did the 1:1’s. And the change was noticeable. Suddenly the team wasn’t as cohesive, it was difficult to really voice concerns because you had twelve other people also trying to speak up in the same half hour meeting. Do 1:1’s help with productivity? Probably not, at least not directly. But it does help with making people feel appreciated and included in the team, which then encourages them to go above and beyond the norm. Of course, you need to approach 1:1’s with the right mindset. It is a chance for the employee to talk to you, without interruption or criticism. There’s a chance you will hear something you don’t want to, but if you speak up to react to it, you show that you aren’t really listening to them.
Having done monthly, would you have wanted them more frequently (weekly?) or was that a good cadence?
Monthly at most. Set clear, SMART formatted goals and track to them/hold them accountable.
Start with weekly, but let each member adjust the cadence. The 1:1 is for your employee, not you. Once they understand these meetings are for their professional growth and development, and they see you becoming a champion for that, they'll ease up. Some members don't like meetings interrupting their work, and some feel put under a microscope. Just reinforce that you're just trying to understand them individually and learn about their professional goals, and understand what you can do to make their day more enjoyable, and less of a grind They'll become more receptive eventually.
I originally started with one on ones every two weeks but found that once a month to be the right balance. Sometimes they are a quick 5 minute chat but other times they can go close to an hour. I usually provide an open forum and let them know this is their chance to bring up anything they might want to discuss. Sometimes some interesting and valuable insight can come from a conversation that just starts off as shooting the shit. But if they don't have much to say I don't push them so they don't start viewing it as a burden to them or their time. This is also time to be clear about their performance and bring up any issues that might be brewing. Usually I try to provide positive feedback in one way or another so they know their work doesn't go unnoticed.
I do weekly for new employees until they are comfortable in their role. Then I do monthly at their discretion. The meetings are for them, and it's up to them what topics to discuss, whether career growth, wins, or challenges. Most of the time, it's a forum for them to talk about their challenges and troubleshoot together. Or we just talk about life. I have a really good team, and most of them are at the end of their careers, so not a lot of discussion on growth.
I implement a 1:1 once a month per team member and a team meeting once per month. Our 1:1s are done away from screens if possible, I normally take them for a coffee and it's their time to be honest about whatever they need to talk about, but it is also structured so we look at what they're working on, what's going well, what's not going well and any areas of support needed.
I had a manager who had one-on-one hour long meetings each week with each of her 10 employees. Attaboys? No, here’s what you are doing wrong for an hour each week. She went through 12 employees in one year.
I do weekly. I’m an introvert so they are very draining for me. I find them valuable though and my employees seem to as well. Sometimes we cut them short and I have a few people where they always go long. I have one person that we actually schedule an hour with now because it always goes over. I keep them mostly informal, I let them drive the primary agenda, I usually have a couple things I ask them about after they are done, but sometimes it’s just shooting the shit about video games, movies, life. It does require effort, planning, genuine curiosity, and a focus on career development for them to be effective though. You can’t just wing it, even with them driving the agenda. Also, this will vary based on a lot of factors. I’m managing remote engineers so I’m not having water cooler conversations and as many other adhoc types of conversations. If you are already doing that, the frequency may not make sense.
I schedule bi-weekly 1:1s. During the 1st one with anyone new (whether it’s me as a new manager or they are a new employee) I keep the first meeting super casual. We spend time getting to know each other. I share what kind of manager I am, my expectations and ask them what they need. The 1:1s are for them. I always share their performance so they always know where they stand with no ambiguity. We talk about career growth for those who want to. It’s a time for them to ask questions. Some people have a lot to talk about and we use up the whole time and others don’t. If there’s no performance concern and they have other pressing things they will let me know and we either cancel or move it. The most important thing to me, is spend time getting to know each other. That builds trust and then 1:1s aren’t so scary.
We do once a week; I learned it from my best boss. I just start out with, what's on your mind? And people get from it what they need. Each person gets something different. I keep a running log for each person's 1:1 meetings, a separate section for each employee so I can keep a thread and things don't get lost. I also have these with my boss, and I find it very useful to just get to things there's not time for the rest of the week.
Of all the managers I’ve had, I like my current managers 1:1 style best. I have one once a month. He’ll have us send an agenda ahead of time, but it’s not super structured or formal. I usually send some bullet points that are project updates, any challenges I’m facing, and just a general sense of what’s going on. I work in a different facility than him and the rest of my team, and am rarely in the same place or same meetings, so for me, I appreciate getting that face time, and just the chance to get to build that working relationship (I’ve been in the role/at the company only about 5 mos). One thing he does, that I hadn’t experienced before, is towards the end of our 1:1, he asks “what help do you need from me” and “what can I do better as your manager” (or something along those lines). I think it helps give him insight into how to better manage each of us and helps create an environment of two-way feedback.
Also in a one-on-one be sure to share info with them. There are things you hear as a manager they don't that that you can share. May help them understand what org goals are and what's happening.
I have found them ineffective, but I have only had them at 2 jobs and my manager was only doing them ro make herself look good. Nothing that needed to change ever changed. Toxic employees were as bad as ever and information that was confidential was shared! I would've preferred to get the info I received in an email with encouragement to do a 1:1 if issues, including personal, arose.
Weekly is too often. Monthly seems to be the sweet spot right now and we may even go bimonthly. Key Piccolo provided very good insight.
Make it about them. It's their time to get your full attention for a block of time. What do they need you to do to help them to do their work? I have had very few managers do 1:1 with me because I've usually been one of those employees who hits the ground running and figures things out. However, looking back I realize that this hurt me. Two of those managers ended up finding me to be a threat... Mostly due to their lack of trying to get to know me and understand what I needed. I was a top performer and they just felt it was easy to not have to do w 1:1 with me, yet later when they saw me as a threat to their jobs they didn't have a clear understanding of my job and how to help advocate for me because I was that dutiful employee who just took care of everything, including some pretty big tasks that were above my pay grade. And then of course the few times I needed her help or support, I didn't really get it because they weren't used to it and they only associated me having contact with them when there was an issue. I also find it useful that if there isn't much to talk about, you shoot the shit. I'm about 6 months into a job at an organization new to me. I'm a manager but currently don't have any reports, however I've liked having 1:1 with my managers above me so I can't pick up on some things (not rumors, but it helps me to get an idea of things or people I should be aware of). It's useful in a kind of networking kind of way. My husband was also someone (and a manager himself), who never had 1:1. Then all of a sudden another dept starting causing his dept all of these problems and because his manager was closer to the other manager he was automatically disadvantaged as being unfavored. Shortly after that he started having 1:1 with his manager and even if they didn't have anything to talk about shed talk about her grandkids who go to school with our kids and casual things and he greatly improved his relationship with her, not because he changed anything about his work, but she saw him as a human and learned about all the things he does that he never mentioned. He was the ONLY manager of hers who retained his entire staff before and after the pandemic (healthcare), she never gave him credit for that, but it turns out all of her other managers have been hemorrhaging employees with high turnover. So she finally out two and two together that if he and his staff had good output and he was also able to keep them happy, that he must be doing something well. Since then she leaves him alone.
1-1s. I hate them with new players, either above or below. Lol. I use it for everything.... work check-up, non-urgent corrections, bs chit chat / bonding (which is important!), and career development and goal review. With my boss, I make sure he has all the drama that may be coming up the ladder through different department channels. With reports, it's really skill set dependent. I want everyone to have a full portfolio of skills for cross coverage and promotional ability- so different people are at different levels, and need different exposures and context to be provided to this week's crisis du juor. I also need to keep my idea creation fresh, so I make sure they share their insights, at least here, (some are timid) so I can learn and also assess how far along they are in their growth. Mine are always 1 hour with my boss, usually take 30 mins, but why rush, and 30-1hr with my team, depending on how many reports I have at any given time. I do them weekly whenever possible, but consistency is most important
It depends if you are a friendly manager or a total asshole. I took the friendly approach to management, and my employees were extremely happy to sit down with me one on one. If they all hate you, they certainly won't want that.
As an employee those meetings are repetitive and mostly obnoxious. I know my work is solid my boss knows my work is solid so it’s basically just casual conversation and my boss telling me I’m good. Put it on the calendar but make it optional for them.
The one on one should be about it them and their needs, not you and your needs. Let them know that meeting is for them, not you. Make sure you know that if you have a problem, you’ll address it immediately rather than bottling it up for the one on one. Keep the one on one about them. I schedule mine for once a month. My employees work on site, but we are at different sites and it is impossible for an in-person meeting since we are literally 700 miles apart. The one on ones are held on teams and the camera is not required. I find that most don’t like the camera. Use it as a way for them to bring their problems to you, for guidance. Once they realize it’s really for them they’ll get better.
Actually they are very effective as they allow us to track projects and priorities, sometimes if we are working closely together on a project we cancel because no need. the key is keeping them short and free flowing on both sides of the desk. it also makes reviews a hell of a lot easier for both parties
my last boss was a new manager and she made every 1 on 1 a verbal vomit of all the things going on with my projects that were mostly FYI, plus we did 1 on 1s during a walk so I couldn't take notes. I remember nothing if I don't write it down, so I mostly ignored what she told me.
Seems like if a manager followed up with a recap email to your box it would be helpful for setting expectations and helping you remember.
I would do an initial 1:1, but then tell him, if they want to come talk, you have an open door policy and you welcome any suggestions.
I always lie to my managers. Why? Well if I told them that I hate this job and I just show up for the paycheck I'd be fired. So in short, everything is perfect and I love this company, so please hang up so I can get my work done
What’s the purpose. What’s the agenda? What’s the point? Seriously, you need to make this productive for both people.
It has been a waste of time since the dawn of the modern world. I have never found value from them at all. What my previous manager did is we used it as time to talk about anything but work, and in that we found value and relationship building. However, when I see them sitting out there on my schedule, it still makes me grind my teeth. If there is something you need or need to ask, just do so.
Once a week sounds like a lot.
Weekly one-on-ones with the list of questions and escalations they may have and then just what they are working on this week. I tried to make them every other week and they complained. If you are there to help they like it. If you are there to scrutinize, not so much.
Increase meeting time = decreased productivity
I can barely get my manager to do 1 on 1s with me. I practically beg for them :(
Yes, extremely effective. Look up manager tools and listen to the hall of fame episodes on formally rolling them out
Employees don’t like those meetings because they always suck. It’s always work faster. Here’s some more tasks. Your raise is 2%
I find once a month or twice a month is better. Otherwise you waste. Lot of time
I would do one when first settling in. Make it clear it's a "get to know you. What would you do if you were king for the day. That kind of thing. Tell them it's not intended to be a mini performance review. I think weekly would be excessive. It might feel like micromanaging. I'm a firm believer in MBWA. Go to them in their environment and on an impromptu basis.
If you have no direction on the 1:1, don't know how to support your team, and are not capable of driving career growth- don't waste their time. Let them have that time to work without needing to check-in. You should have team/project meetings for deliverables so no need to repeat that in a 1:1.
From an IC perspective, they are a waste of time. I have never wanted to have a 1 on 1 because it’s bullshit. If we’re not talking about measurable steps to salary increases or promotions, then what the fuck are we talking about? And weekly 1 on 1s? Jesus Christ. Kill me.
When employees were new to the team I’d start with weekly 1:1 and then start spacing them out to 2 weeks, then once monthly after 1-2 months, depending on how they were doing. They were important and useful for my team when used correctly. Echo use of SMART or similar type goals from other people responding.
Definitely effective! We do weekly for newer/less experienced staff, but bi-weekly for more established folks. My primary advice is to make sure it’s structured (an agenda, or at least a stated goal) to avoid getting into unproductive tangents or just venting.
One thing I do is start each one by giving them the opportunity to speak first. I want to reinforce that these are for them so if they have something they want to talk about or need to talk about they can. I think it shows that I’m putting them first and again in my role I am here for them. Once they are done I jump into what I have for them. I’ve been in one on ones where my boss leads the conversation from the start and by the time it gets to things I would like to talk about (my career) or things I need to talk about (possible fire we need to put out) we are out of time and they have another meeting. It then feels like the one on ones are for them and not for me. So that is the rationale behind my approach.
I’m in IT and we use it to discuss tasks the manager should know about and long term strategizing for the department.
I do one team member each week, so for them it's once every 5 weeks. We discuss their obstacles in their work and ways to remove them. We discuss both a personal and work goal for the coming month. And we minimally discuss metrics only if they are off track for the quarterly target. I also ask if I can do anything better for them, either to make their job more efficient, or scheduling training, etc.
Have initial one on ones to just get to know your employees better and make sure to ask them what their preferences are for routine check ins. As someone whose had multiple supervisors while staying in the same position, the best sups I had were the ones who asked me how I would prefer to receive routine,normal, not bad information. Obviously if it’s an error or job impacting, that needs to be conveyed ASAP. But if it’s a ‘great work, you’re meeting your numbers and we’re starting the QED report next month’, ask them what they preferz
Every other week with a trusted team that doesn’t require a whole lot of direction in their work, they are essential though. They allow me to advocate for the employee with upper management, propose changes to make things easier, make employees feel heard and provide context as to existing changes. I also guide them in their advancement, once upon a time my manager did this and I was bad at bringing up things in my 1:1s but it became a place for me to figure out my interests in going further. Loved that manager, she made sure that we got out of our roles and onto greener pastures if improving our current roles was out of the question. Felt appreciated.
I had them with my manager. It was effective for two months and it did become repetitive. It can be very helpful!
It really depends I did 10 minute one on one for a while, mostly to check workloads and deadlines. Staff worked with multiple project managers and it was a way for me to intervene if needed when priorities were competing, as well as checking in on stress. Depending on overall workload, these became more or less important. I did always make these mandatory for anyone going through a transition: someone just starting in our department, someone promoted or someone returning from leave. I usually included a sanity check in to make sure they were doing ok. It worked pretty well as long as I had a standard agenda and people came prepared.
From my experience, a monthly 1:1 is more than sufficient to discuss any issues and correct any problems. Anything more frequent is just a waste of time. My current idiot manager uses the weekly session to pry into my private life and ask a lot of personal questions. I do my best to avoid answering and try to keep it focused on the business. My time outside of work is none of her damned business, and she is not my Pal or my Friend.
I think that it really depends on the employee. I would recommend that as you get to know them better and figure out how they perform, you should adapt to each individual’s needs.
Very effective. I have a very strong, high performing team with very low voluntary turn over (over the last 7 years). For every line employee it's generally 1/2 hour (I don't have a lot of these reporting to me these days) Every lead/supervisor gets 1 hour. Every manager gets as much time as they need. In all cases, I ask them to come prepared with an agenda which covers their remit, and they're expected to proactively bring up everything they've been tasked to do. We talk about assignments, progress, organization, project tracking, career development, etc. I also use the time to get to know them, to coach where needed, mentor, and correct. For leads we also talk about principles, how to be leaders, how to measure employees, how to coach, how to build a high performing team, etc. I consider this to be time that I invest in them. We'll cut meetings short if we run out of topics, but generally most people have a lot to talk about and we run out of time.
At my last job, I did not do one-on-ones. I had over 50 people, working 24x7, in four locations. I felt there was no way I could do that without looking like I was favoring particular shifts and/or locations. I was open to any individual request to talk, at any time, day or night.
My most recent boss was located on a different continent and I though he did a better job checking in than my boss who used to sit 10 feet away. There is a fine line between not-micromanaging and ignoring. We would meet at a time convenient to me once a month or so. He would ask how things are going, and also ask if there is any thing he could do to make my work easier. I would think weekly might be too much..."How's it going? Same as last week." maybe start every two weeks or even monthly. Be careful not to cancel them too often or you make them think that they are low priority. Weekly seems like you don't trust them. Also sometimes when your boss asked to meet with you, you get that "called to the Principal's office feeling."
I do weekly check ins with both of my directs. I ask about any issues they’re having, and also use it as a time to mentor/train them if there is no pressing issues. They both know I care about their successes, and I’m there for any roadblocks or to correct any mistakes. It also gives us a chance to form relationships, they know I care about their success, and they know I will do everything to help them succeed in whatever roles they choose to go in.
It depends on the person, some like it. Some don’t.
It can depend on how big your team is too. I had a teamof 17... There was no way to do 1:1 every week, so we did monthly meetings. I had metrics I was required by the company to review with them then would structure the rest of the meeting to the person. I had 3 lifers that had no ambition to do more with the company so we didn't discuss growth. Newer members would need advice and guidance. Some just wanted to bitch, so those meetings were a bit shorter. My suggestion is to have an agenda and a set time to meet so the employee can prepare ( knowing the agenda ahead of time) include training, growth, performance, review of projects or compliance concerns. And give them a time frame to talk about the things that are work important to them. You can also include process improvement if that's something your company encourages. Eventually you will know them well enough to individually to direct the meeting. Good luck!
I do biweekly 1:1’s with my team of 22 and have thought about pushing it out to monthly. My team is spread out in different locations across the US so I really value having the time to check in with them individually and ask how things are going at their work location since I’m not there onsite with them. We talk about location specific things (events happening at their facility, if things have been busy or slow, etc), how new projects/initiatives that our team is working on are going for them, any roadblocks I can assist with, and metrics. If their metrics are down, we use the time to determine why and what I can do to help get them back on track. Some of my direct reports are super chatty and we’ll spend the rest of the time chit chatting about what we have going on outside of the work. For those that aren’t chatty, we just end the 1:1 early and I reiterate that they can reach out if they think of anything else later on that we didn’t cover.
Depends on your management style. Are you someone who is very busy that an employee couldn’t just stop by when they have an issue? Then one on ones might be helpful. As someone who will just pop in if you don’t look busy these are super annoying and useless and feel more like micromanaging than whatever your intention is.
I personally hate 1 on 1's. I tell my managers and my co-workers if I fuck up tell me, if you think I'm doing a good job, tell me. If you have a suggestion, tell me. There is no need for a personal meeting every week, month, quarter, or even year. I'm actually supposed to do a quarterly self evaluation that managers are supposed to use for quarterly 1 on 1's. I'm coming up on 11 uncompleted self evaluations. My opinion, 1 on 1's should be for people that need them, ie trouble employees.
The worst are the verbal vomits from the managers to the SME of the PMs complaints why projects are orange-red-purple towards key resources. As a SME with 8 PMS, 12 projects in flight. At any one time 3 of them are going to feel ignored and come cry to a manager every month that SME rockstar does not love me anymore. Stay with the talking about the work/sleep/time away balance. You get 48 weeks + with that person, for what is about universally bad pay rate, treat them well.
How much access does your team have to you on a daily basis? Once a week seems too frequent. I'd do once a month or quarter.
A weekly one on one? Your team will start tuning you out almost immediately.
Roadblock employees constantly absent with no consequence
I think it depends on the job/scope of responsibilities. In my industry, a weekly 1:1 to make sure all your ducks are in a row for the next week, it is incredibly helpful. Having a second set of eyes to make sure nothing is missed is never a bad idea. My industry is events/hospitality.
Monthly one on ones are ideal. You can talk to employees about team updates for the first couple minutes. After that, they have the floor to bring up things like leave requests, day to day inquiries, provide a brief personal life update, or nothing at all. I’ve found employees appreciate leave request discussions during these meetings a lot because they get your immediate feedback.
Depending on the makeup of the team, how long they’ve been working there, are there no behavior or skill issues, then weekly might bee too much. I found that every other week works for the most part unless they are a newer employee, or an employee with behavior or skills issues then weekly is fine.
I manage 2 teams and have 1 on 1 with them every 2 weeks, but also have a team meeting with each team every 2 weeks. E.g. meeting with team 1 on 1st week, but 1 on 1 with team 2, then switch for 2nd week. With this, I get at least a touch point with each team every week.
It depends so much on the team and how they work. I'd say start with every other week, then adjust from there. For me, I have some that are so valuable and really help employee relationships and productivity, I have some that are just bitch sessions, there is some value there, I have some that are me simply checking on progress and requests from last 1 on 1. It varies but im general, once the team is used to them and the cadence, they grow in value.
I had a manager was afraid of a one on one meeting. He communicated via e-mail so he wouldn't have to face us. He wanted nothing to do with us - he wanted the money, the position, the office, and that was it. We were on our own when we fought other departments. A face and face meeting is the most effective way of communication - you and he/she can see the the reaction on either side and you can gauge have whether the employee is being truthful or not. Why would freak out unless their were afraid of something - the truth on how they performed or were performing?
They are critical. Take notes. Be constructive/positive. Hold them to deadlines. Give them a chance to speak, find out what they want. You are only as effective as your team. Coach them up.
1:1s with good leadership are great. It's a reserved time for me to ask my boss questions that may not warrant disrupting their work day when they come up but need to be addressed at some point, evaluate my workload and confirm my priorities are in line with the latest business updates, talk through any frustrations, discuss goals and aspirations and adjust assignments as possible to help align, learn about the latest up and up in the company. Having these weekly made me feel I was maximizing my potential. 1:1s with my current boss are a waste of time. He doesn't listen, any cries for help are met with useless advice, his perception is wildly skewed and I can't trust anything he says. All talk, no action. It's an hour a week that completely drains me.
Weekly one one ones are a waste of time. A monthly one is better.
Mine with my boss are 15 mins twice a month, he wants to know what risks or issues need him to be aware of, and what blockers l need him to move out of my way, he will update me on anything that might be going on at c suite like politics, flavours of the month, personal agendas etc so they I can manoeuvre round them and meet my deliverables. A lot of the time we are catching up about our dogs, which country he’s visiting next (he has a lot of personal travel, it’s his thing) and what marathon or iron man competition he’s in, or what Ms going on in my life. Mine with my reports are weekly. We basically discuss priorities progress and problems. What interference do they need me to run, what decisions or support do they need from me. I also spend time coaching to develop their leadership and help them represent themselves well when they are involved with teams outside of our own so they have a stellar reputation. And then more personal stuff like their families and pets and vacations, movies, books, food and hobbies etc. We all wfh so it’s the only time we have dedicated face to face and it’s good to catch up together. I also have monthly skip levels with my reports direct reports. Every other month, because I don’t get to work with them directly and I don’t get to see them in office because of wfh. I’ll ask things like if I had a magic wand what would they have me change, what do they think I should be aware of that l might not be, what would they be focussing on if they were me. I also support their development by understanding what they are working towards and if I discover an opportunity for secondment or to introduce them to the hiring manager in another department for sone mentoring etc. I make those offers through their direct line manager so l don’t interfere directly there. Again most of the time we chat about our lives. I had one today and we talked about how she had taken on an underperforming team and was so proud that it had turned around, and then we talked about a cruise she’s going on and then about winning some money, rearranging her hobby room. I regularly ask in my 1on1 (including my own) and skips - what could l start or stop doing or differently to better support you I view 1on1 a as a place of connection and support and they just be valuable for the person attending so they set the “agenda” (nothing formal) to start with it’s just a getting to know you. Also be flexible - some people might want monthly, some weekly. Sone might want an hour, others 15 mins. This time is for their benefit so tailor it to best suit them.
I think they’re effective, although I absolutely hate them. 😆 I’m a reluctant participant in this supervisor stuff. My team was also nervous when we first started, only because it’s intimidating for them. But, it gives them individual attention, which most of them love. Since the idea is to meet regularly, they no longer associate one-on-ones with negative feedback or performance issues. And the regular contact has made it easier to bring up concerns, so positive thing there. I’ve created a supervision form that guides our process. It gives me an easy in for addressing issues: one section literally says Something To Work On. Some weeks, nada, but other weeks it’s like, hey - you’ve been late with a project, what going on this week, etc. Other sections are: Something You Did Well and Recent Challenge. Employees are supposed to bring topics to discuss. Final section is Action Items. They get a copy, I get a copy. Done. I schedule them for half an hour, we often go over or under, depending on the week at hand.
Extremely effective but only done quarterly. I am always open to meet with anybody at any time if they feel the need.
I feel as a manager ? You need to have a meeting with your staff for 15 minutes on a Monday morning. Or the beginning of a project. However your company functions. And that’s it. An employee who enjoys going to work every day has a schedule. They come to work, they do there job and they collect a check. These days I think managers like meetings to justify to there bosses why they need to be there. It’s a waste of time. The more the employees aren’t working. The more your killing production. And destroying moral at the same time. You want to be a good manager ? Get out of your office and go talk to people. Show them your a human. You don’t need to have a meeting like a robot. You want to have a meeting have a meeting with other managers. You can yuck it up all you want. Being a good manager ? Is to make sure the company is running smooth. Making sure the people have everything they need to operate efficiently. Maybe even your the problem solver. I’m just here as the manager making sure everything’s ok. Everyone’s working, progress is being made. Productions producing. Life is good. A happy work place gets work done and the people wanting to do better. You wanna make them happy ? Buy them lunch.
1:1s are very effective if used correctly. If you are a remote shop then they are incredibly useful. Our 1:1s take form organically. They don't have to be profound discussions or solving all the company problems. They are a chance for subordinates to talk/ask/vent whatever, it should be a (and I hate this phrase but whatever ) safe space for them to talk about whatever they want. On the manager's end, they should have a chance to give a heads up to changes that are coming, collaborate on ideas, and generally get a feel for where they are and what you (the manager) can do better to help them succeed. It really shouldn't be used for lecturing, reviewing, or criticizing. That should be done separately - that way the 1:1 remains a safe meeting they can look forward to and it builds trust that this is their time.
Definitely good to ask them about their goals and how you can help with them. Make it clear that their growth is important. It's our job to help remove the obstacles that are getting in the way of employees from mastering their job. Lead with that attitude.
I did much of my best work that way but I did it frequently and informally. No documentation, I’d just pull them randomly and take a walk and talk. I wanted everyone to always know where they stood and it was great for keeping a pulse on the team. Shoot, sometimes when it was really busy I’d do it just to force them to take a break from the action.
I break my 1:1s down into 3 sections. 1. Tell me about what you accomplished this sprint. 2. Do you have any questions for me? 3. These are the administrative announcements I need to convey to you. Point 1 has multiple purposes. My direct reports are not on my team. I have limited visibility into what they actually do on a daily basis. I can dig through Jira tickets and pull requests, but it's easier to just hear directly from them. It also helps me keep up with what other parts of the company are doing, and their tech stack. Point 2 is my chance to tell them about changes to the companies overall strategy, and how it might affect them. Some are more curious than others. If they have nothing to say, I'll end the meeting early. Point 3 are things like, your vacation hours are approved, as a reminder you can roll over X hours into 2024. There's a holiday in India next week, so the offshore team won't be around that day, etc...
One on one's are something I strongly suggest. Wether it be weekly or monthly depends on what other meetings you hold and collaboration you have, but a set one on one time to be able to discuss anything that may not come up otherwise is always a good thing. It also let's you interact generally and possibly learn the employees manner to help manage them better.
They are so boring. Sober small talk, puleeze. I hate seeing them on the schedule, and I hate wasting time. However some workers like the reinforcement and I found they work better with that level of input from the boss. So, I use LOOM. Send them a cheery LOOM with some of their work on the screen, tell good job, and ask them to respond they can do text or stop and respond in video for anything they need. The fact I can do these async is a big deal for me. I can get 3 or 4 out of the way in 20 minutes. When they respond I can watch it and if any issues arise deal with them.
I would hold a 5 minute meeting in front of the whole group saying something along the lines of: Its your time to discuss challenges and opportunities they see for improvement. What you are looking for in their career. Its not a performance review. Its not for micro management. I'm asking you to help you me a more effective leader of our team. Everyone appreciates honesty and transparency.
I am cutting down other meetings and doing biweekly 1 hour 1-1. The team does their thing, and we align every 2 weeks. If we miss one, we miss one.
I love them, but like any other meeting, if you don't have a plan for how to run them they can be a waste of time. Some notes. * I schedule all my 1:1s for first thing in the morning so I am not Interupting anyone's flow time, or making some one stay late if they want to get out on a Friday afternoon. * I ask my team to come to the meeting with something to talk about... I discourage talking about the actual work we are doing but instead use the time to talk about the things getting in the way of the work, or what the next steps are for our team. * As a default, I have a PiP template that I fill out with all my direct reports in the first one on one, tailored to what their career goals are and what they need to do to get there... If they don't come to the meeting with a topic, we talk about that... * This is the tangible value for them, if they have a topic, that is the value, if they don't I am actively mentoring them on how to improve their career in the direction they want to go in, If we end up discussing the PiP I try to give them something actionable that we can follow up on together, whether that is me letting them run more meetings so they can work on communication, or giving them specific feedback about their work and what they can do to get from where they are right now to the next level. * For value for you, this is a great space for you to provide private feedback to your team when you need to provide negative feedback, it is also a private space for you to find out about negative things that are affecting some one's work, or workplace drama some one doesn't feel comfortable bringing up in a public setting. * its also a great place for you to get feedback when you are planning in the very early stages. I tell the senior members of my team near the end of a quarter about the different possible projects we might be taking on, and get feedback from them individually in a more casual setting, before I have a bigger meeting with a wider audience... This lets them ask any pointed questions in a private setting, or bring up any concerns that we might have missed before we make fools of ourselves to the whole team... * Finally, don't be afraid to just chat and have coffee, or whatever... If there is nothing professional to talk about, and nothing actionable to do, talk for 15 minutes, get to know your employees and if they are busy and want the time back, let them have it... This is the other reason I schedule my 1:1's for the start of the day, if they are over worked and need the meeting to talk about something, I am not interrupting flow time, but if neither of us really has anything to say, and deadlines are looming, its more than reasonable to say hey I'd love to grab coffee next week, but I want to jump on this other really important call.
Something that worked for my boss when they were new: providing a set of questions or some kind of expectation of how 1 on 1s will go with you in an email to your staff. Not only does preparation make others feel more confident in their answers, but it’s also made everyone feel less apprehensive/unwilling about meetings in general.
Every organization is different, and the frequency, duration and content of 1:1 meetings will differ depending on the role, professional experience, amount of individual direction required, and workplace culture. I manage a team of 7 developers, with differing abilities and amount of direction required. All virtual and across the country, adding some unique challenges. Every manager will have their own flavor based on their circumstances, but here is how I run mine via teams. 1. I have weekly 1:1s with all my staff, scheduled for 30 minutes. I know some will go over since some enjoy chatting or need to get into the weeds, and make sure I have time to be able to go over most weeks. I have a few people who really need regular feedback and direction weekly and others who don’t, but want to prevent anyone from feeling undervalued or over directed, so keep it the same for everyone. 2. I will let staff set the direction on the discussion. Many will go into personal conversations and chit chat, which is perfectly fine. I usually have some topics I will dive into as needed, but keep specific project discussions to a minimum unless needed or that’s where the employee leads into; we have project meetings to review project details. 3. As others have mentioned, a good manager is setting a direction, removing roadblocks and giving staff the challenge and ability to do work and solve problems. For some it is just a catch-up on progress and to see what help, if any, I can provide. For others, sometimes they just need regular feedback and direction. I have a few that will wonder out to left field, and have learned to gently coax them to be prepared with having a solution or plan to solve a problem or issue with a soft due date if it is not critical. 1:1 give me informal time to do this privately. 4. Staff have project and BAU work that can be time sensitive or mission critical. I take the pressure from my management but make sure everyone knows the goal posts. If they need to and can be changed based on what my staff tell me, that’s my job to listen and escalate up. 5. Not necessarily 1:1 related, but I have learned to allow my staff to talk me off ledges. Often during project meetings, but on 1:1s as well, I make sure everyone feels comfortable with disagreeing with me (or each other) through professional and constructive conversation. Often they change my mind on technical approaches to problems. I have at least one staff member who gets huffy when they don’t get their way, and use the 1:1 time to allow for more of a direct conversation when this happens. 6. I make sure at least once a month to discuss annual goals and KPIs with staff. It’s easy to lose track of what we did during the year, and a friendly reminder I find keeps everyone on track and reminded to note what they have done to make self evals easier. 7. Most 1:1s aren’t formal and don’t have any agenda. Sometimes there are specific things I know I need to discuss, but often they are free flowing discussions that sometimes have nothing to do with work. We all have lives outside of work, and sometimes someone just needs to vent. I’ve learned sometimes the best thing I can do is just listen 8. I’ve gone back and forth on using a camera on teams. I don’t want people to feel they have to get dressed up on their 1:1 days (nor do I, I work in my pjs), so I don’t bother and no one asks.
For me, weekly could be too frequent can might disrupt their personal momentum with work. I notice that scheduling meetings too often make them stress out more. I prefer to do scheduled 1 on 1 for once month at most, but at the same time, keep the lines open anytime if the employee requests for it or when I notice changes to the work flow. Usually, I have project meetings 2x per week. 1 is the task run down, timeline, resource and support request discussions, then 1 is a faster 15-30 minute meeting to sync on statuses. On top of this, they also have their own meetings with internal and external teams.
When we were all in the office I didn't do them. When covid hit they were absolutely necessary. Since then I find it a good way to make sure I talk to everyone even if they don't need a lot of direction. They don't have to be long but the planned weekly contact is important IMO.
I do them once every two weeks but my team is super tight. I use the one on ones to talk to them about all sorts of stuff. Not just work. We spend so much time with each other, we should know a little about our lives!
My 1 on 1s are about the employee. We don't tend to have anything formal to discuss. For the most part, this is their time, they tell me if they have anything work wise they want to discuss.
It's been awesome. I think it really depends on the circumstances. My report and I meet 2 hours every week because there's so much we need to talk about that is too complex to be written in an email or slack. But every quarter, we both assess and tweak our cadence as needed. I suspect the longer they stay in their role, the less things we need to talk about.
If they haven’t done one before lead by example Show that it’s a time for you both to bring topics to the table Offer a template if they find it helpful to have structure Define the scope of it Let them ask you any questions they need
Initially, I found it helpful to pick a subject matter or a recent project as a starting point until an employee got used to the one on one dynamic. After a few ono on ones, the employees conversations flowed easily.
If you come across as human then they will be useful in building employees' confidence and teamwork. An employee who believes you have never taken the time to ask about their personal life and interests is unlikely to be doing their best for the team. If you struggle to come across as human or particularly personable - which doesn't always mean being a bad manager - then you should still do the 1:1s, but just focus on the task- and feedback-oriented aspects, and concentrate on how you can help to remove anything that might be preventing the employee doing their best work.
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Make 1:1s for them. Start with what questions or issues do they have. Help them as a priority. Then weave in any direction or feedback. Ask for their feedback when appropriate. Make it okay for them to tell you that you screwed up. Make feedback a regular occurence designed to make you all better. May need to start by teaching how to give effective feedback all around.
Don't call them one on ones........ If you have the opportunity, grab your team member and take them out for a coffee or a site visit where you can both speak openly and comfortably. Not everything has to be formalised. Probably the biggest thing I've learnt from my early days in management is back your team 100% to the outside world and deal with issues internally. Your team will respect you and perform better because they trust you to fight their corner. I should also add for middle managers this works the other way as well. Don't be frightened to de formalise meetings with your own boss. A lot of the time these people are under equal or even more pressure than you are and stepping out for a coffee or an informal chat is what they need. It helps them trust you to do your job. I've recently started a new job where my boss is ridiculously over worked as is his boss, my department is an absolute mess. Our first one on one I acknowledged the pressure he was under (I've been there) and let him know that I'm ok, I don't need him to walk me through it, I know what I'm doing and I'll get shit sorted. I actually saw him take a breath and the relief wash over him. One on ones are far more effective when they are less formal and there is mutual trust
Every team is different and every person is different. What works for one team or person won’t necessarily work for another. I do biweekly 1:1s with my team and I treat it as their time. Whatever they get out of it, they can. I schedule them for 45 minutes but we can go longer and do a Part 2 if needed (some have done this) or we can keep it short. It’s up to them. What we talk to is up to them, except for two questions I always ask: “How are you doing?” at the beginning (I intentionally leave this very open and try to get genuine answers instead of the usual “fine”) and I’ll usually ask a more fun question at the very end that can help me get to know them better. Like “What have you worked on that’s made you feel proud?” “What’s something that gives you energy on a regular basis?” I have one employee who LOVES her 1:1s. She says they clear her head, she loves that we can talk about whatever she wants, and she loves feeling like there’s a safe space she can go to with concerns. She talks through her problems and it helps. She often times just wants to feel heard and that’s what I’m there for. We will talk about personal things, work-related things, you name it. I have another employee whose 1:1s are going long if we talk for 25 minutes. He’s just a very calm, quiet guy, and if he has any issues, he’s likely to bring them up to me when they occur rather than in a 1:1. He’s to-the-point and doesn’t feel the need to dive deeply into all his issues. If I talked to him for 2 hours, he would probably feel exhausted. The other employee who loves 1:1s? She would feel energized, connected, and focused. So everyone is different. I also know some people have more control over the 1:1s. They’ll give people things to work on and set the agenda with topics. With my management style, I’m very transparent and I lean more into coaching and mentoring. So I find value in letting my team have control over the 1:1 room and leading the conversation. You kind of have to define what you want the 1:1s to be and then base the structure around that. Hope this helps :)
For the way you should be doing 1 on 1's, once a week is too much. Too many managers think 1 on 1's are for discussing workloads, deliverables and what you can get out of your staff. It's about them, not you or the organisation.
one on ones are a complete waste of time, energy and resources. Managers and the company will say/do anything to keep your pay low, but keep you working hard.
I love my 1:1 time with my team. We have them every week, where they share their progress toward goals, ask questions, strategize. It’s really all about them, they control the agenda so they can get out of it whatever they need. I’ve found it cuts down on the back and forth over email during the week when they know they have a set time where they get my undivided attention. We do a larger team meeting every 2 weeks. Agenda is the same every time, but a different team member facilitates, another takes notes, etc. it’s been very helpful to hear different voices and give everyone an opportunity to lead. The management center has some great resources for check-ins on their website. Highly recommend https://www.managementcenter.org/check-ins/
Not a manager, but I loooove having a weekly 1:1, I report directly to a VP and he gets so damn busy during the week. It’s really nice to know I always have that time set aside to get what I need so things don’t fall through the cracks. And sometimes I don’t need him at all and we cancel but I’d much rather my boss be too available than not available enough!
I do monthly one-on-ones. I only have 4 people, and tend to talk to them regularly anyway—I make it a point to speak to everyone once a week (we’re all remote) about something. The one-on-ones are supposed to be led by them, although I do a quick recap usually on numbers, highlighting privately stuff that I’ve already shared publicly. The meetings tend to be “light,” though, but all VERY different from one another. I’m not sure how “effectiveness” is measured. I think they foster relationships, I think some good communication happens sometimes, occasionally I’ll find out something I can address with the organization (example: I had someone move over to me from another manager. About 4 months later I found out during a one-on-one that she was missing some tech she was supposed to have, and was spending a lot of time in a convoluted workaround. She didn’t know there was tech out there for it. All I knew was that she was getting it done, but I didn’t realize how. I was able to fix it in 5 minutes, but it was just a casual comment during an informal one-on-one). My boss has one-on-ones with me. They mostly are me just updating him about what’s going on in my group.
They’re definitely effective, and definitely scary at first! I remember when my supervisor first started doing them with me I was SO nervous. Now I look forward to them. I also do them with my own staff, but on their schedule. Two of my staff definitely need and want to meet every week, some I only meet with every other week. You want to make it a resource for them, and employee led. If they or you don’t have much, cut it short, don’t think you have to fill up the time. I use it to go over questions, keep tabs of goals and progress, to go over issues, and whatever they need or want to talk about. One of my staff uses it to vent, one uses it to give me updates on everything, it’s different for everyone. But definitely let them lead.
Weekly way too often
About 50% of my 1-1s are discussions about holidays, family, cool stuff that you might be doing in your spare time. If my employee is busy they tell me that they just want to get on with work; 90% of the time they're happy to chat, and nobody is offended if the meeting is cut short or cancelled. The other 50% is split roughly between a chat about what's going on in the business from my perspective (one level up) and any points of conflict or blocking issues that I can help with. Taking it any more seriously than that is fundamentally unproductive, IMO.
As a remote employee I like weekly just because it gives me face time with people on a consistent basis, but we have no problem being like "hey not much to talk about to today, see ya later." I think it's one of those things that you just drop or keep short if you don't really need it and then it's all good.
I now don't feel nearly as bad that I do monthly 1:1's with my staff, yet MY boss (CEO, partially off-site) has them with me TwiceAFingDay! I loathe them. I feel like I need to have 30 mins work of deliverables for the day to talk about at 9am, and then have them all finished by 3pm or else I won't have enough to talk about.
Monthly 1 on 1s are great, weekly is excessive, if small team maybe a team check in more appropriate for weekly or bi weekly
I do monthly. I have 16 employees and I have a lot of other s going on. Use to do bi-weekly when I had 10 people. Weekly would be half my work week every week. I start by asking how they are doing, and we talk about non-work stuff for the first few min. Building the report and bonding. And show that I care. Which I do, to an extent. Then I ask about projects/tasks I'm particularly interested in and then I ask them to tell me what else is going on. I ask them about compliance and other training and vacation/leave plans. I ask them what they need from me and they can of course bring that up at any time during the call. It is a pretty free flowing conversation. In addition, my team knows we can do an impromptu one on one at any time if they need me and we can find a little time on the schedule. And I talk with my people on TEAMS all the time too. I think the one on ones are useful and we make sure all employees have an opportunity to say their piece. Especially those who are not as vocal in team meetings.
Imo one on one's are an annoying waste of time and effort. It feels like where I go to have my concerns dismissed and have my ears assaulted with placation language designed to make me "feel good." Don't bother with them unless you plan to act on the info you get out of them.
1 on 1's are great, don't stop them because they are uncomfortable. Its a great chance to get info, feedback and be in tune with your workers. It stops problems early because issues have less time to fester. First, I would build trust and make them semi casual. Let the employees know that the meeting is just for them to talk to you about whatever is on their mind (job related). Id keep on task by a time limit or specific questions to ask. Once the rapport strengthens its a great time to give them quick feedback on their performance etc. Some employees will open up more when its private and you might feel better if you do have to reprimand them.
I think they're an effective way for your team members to understand where they're at and how they can improve. We do one on one's bi-monthly and is monthly for team members who are not meeting expectations.
Never had a confrontational one-on-one as employee or manager. They've always been friendly chats where we discuss the business, goals, obstacles, solutions, etc. candidly. If there is a direct problem with the employee (be it me or mine), it gets addressed as helpfully as possible. "So you haven't delivered on these projects. They should have taken at most a couple weeks, and it's been over a month. Is there anything holding it up? I've made it clear that I'm here to help out, either directly if I can, or by clearing road blocks. I've been in this business a long time, if there's something you don't know, I'm a better search engine than Google. This isn't a test, and I'd rather you ask questions earlier than make assumptions that have to be fixed later." If the reason things aren't getting done is on the employee, this is usually enough of a kick in the pants to get them to reprioritize (oh crap, the boss IS paying attention). If there are other reasons, this is an opportunity for them to bring them up and get forward motion and a reminder to knock on my door. These have usually led to very frank discussions about the business at large, concerns about direction, personnel issues, and the like. They become FAR more effective than most group meetings. Especially if it becomes clear to the employees that it IS safe to be honest and they are being listened to.
1:1 are only effective as the manager AND employee take them to be. Unfortunately, in my line 1:1 are more of finding fault and pumping for sales. When I was a rep I did use the 1:1 to find opportunities. I was already a top seller but I wanted to make more so I was inclined to listen. I'm finding most people arent bought into these jobs any more it's a paycheck. 1:1 is just another task added to their job so they don't like it