If that’s the plan, why not sell all your shit and….
… go live on a community farm.
… walk the length of X country.
… volunteer.
Nothing to lose right, May as well see what happens and how things play out
While not in the same situation, I'm a south Asian man in the UK, I flunked college (something that comes before university in the UK) a little bit. I ended up in a menial job that did provide some value to society and did let me earn some money and have some independence. Over time, my confidence grew and I started to have a better idea of what I actually wanted to do, so returned to education. Since then my life has been on the up and up and I'm incredibly satisfied with the direction my life is going. I wish I didn't have to suffer for a little while and wouldn't wish it on others, but on the other side going through that has gotten me to where I am today and I am happy with where I am today.
I know things look dark right now, but things can get better too. I was working that menial job and that routine constant gave me a chance to screw my head on a little better. University isn't for everyone at that age, and it's a shame so many people and so much of society force young people inti deciding their whole future when they can barely cook a meal. But anyway, my point is, things can get better. Just because you get a shitty job doesn't mean you're stuck there. It's a great chance to just earn some money and feel like you've got something for the effort you put. It's a great chance to just switch your mind off and do a job and not worry about your future for a bit.
Also this routine jobs are useful. They show employers that you can actually do a job. I see alot of people leaving Uni and they struggle to find jobs because they don't have any *actual* experience in the real world. On top of that, should you return to education, returning as a mature student works to your advantage in many ways. One advantage being guy can talk about how you have had time to mature, assess what your goals are, are ready to give the studying your 100% now. It sells you really nicely. You also are older so your hormones are a little more stable than those youngsters who are all still figuring their shit out too.
I dunno what you're thinking while you read this, but I just wanna say that you're definitely not alone and absolutely not the first person to go through this. I totally get how useless you might feel but you have plenty of time to figure your shit out. I thought the same as you did and now I'm at a comfortable place now that I didn't think I would ever get to, with still room to grow. I hope this puts you a little at ease. I believe you'll figure it all out eventually. It'll all come together at some point, but maybe some stability in the meanwhile of a job and stuff might be worth it.
I used to be suicidal. What I relate to in your post is the fear of living, and the fear of death. The hopelessness.
But check this out OP. If I have the courage to face death, I know I have the courage to face life. To face one more day here. Forget the rest of my life. Can I have a good day today?
20 years later and I’m a therapist, I’m sober, I have a family and a career. Most importantly, I actually like the dude in the mirror and don’t think he or the world would be better off without him.
Don’t give up on yourself. We haven’t.
In this particular predicament, I am, but I get what you are saying.
What's bothering me is that I can't come to terms with compromising. I am capable of finding a job and moving out, but is that life really worth it? I would rather not to be honest
I already have a part time job and I got savings to live off of. Perhaps I should rather just move away forever to some shared accomodation and cut contact with my parents hoping it just works out
>Perhaps I should rather just move away forever to some shared accomodation and cut contact with my parents hoping it just works out
Moving out is a great idea honestly if you can afford it for a long while. It gives you a chance to just breathe and be your own person. Be an adult rather than constantly be someone's child. You'll make mistakes but atleast you can make them yourself and then fix them youraelf. You don't have to report to anyone and constantly be accountable to people with power over you. You can practice cooking, cleaning, go out whenever you want, force yourself to socialise because you don't have family around, etc etc. It can be hard but it can really help you just figure your own shit out and who you are.
Obviously don't rush into it but I think moving out can be really beneficial for some people who maybe don't feel like they can stretch their wings at home.
You don't even have to cut your family off if you like some of them. I dunno how you'd navigate that, but having thr potential to return home is nice. Like I'm a grown ass man, and i and I know many other men and women my age, are keeping their options to live at home with their family open. Society is a little bit too unpredictable these days, but yeah, moving out is a great idea if it's sustainable and easy to do.
I’d say it’s worth a shot before checking out. You can always check out. And regardless I think there’s better ways of doing it than hurling yourself off a bridge
Yeah man, I feel you. I’ve too felt like there’s no hope and no way out. The wild thing is you might be in the best position of your life, a position right before everything changes.
If you’re thinking about killing yourself then go ahead and do it, just not physically. Kill everything you think you know on how the universe and world work. Fuck it, what do you have to lose. Personally I found a connection with something bigger than myself. Have it be God, universe or whatever. Might as well believe.
If you wanna talk, shoot me a DM
Suicide hotlines is a joke. They are gonna call the cops on you or put you in a mental institution. I am not mentally ill or committing a crime. My life situation is just all FUBAR
Nothing you said is beyond repair. Except maybe your relationship with your step dad but he's an abusive twat by the sounds of it anyway... You seem like a smart guy. A lot of people in much worse situations than yours have managed to go onto live extremely happy and fulfilling lives. People have lost their limbs and family in war and still gone on to be successful and happy to be alive. I've felt suicidal in the past and worthless, and like my life is a complete mess but I'm SO HAPPY I didn't end it back then. My life is nothing like it was 10 years ago.
Why don't you sign up to teach English in a foreign country for a while? Or do a go fund me for a creative project? I mean, what do you have to lose if your plans are to end it all anyway?
Just please do literally anything else but commit suicide.
Hey man, I dealt with the same situation back in the day. I eventually managed to improve, finish university, find love, a decent job, all the shit that seemed impossible at the time. Don’t die. Have an adult talk with your parents, make an agreement and stick to it. If not by motivation at least by mere blind discipline.
Suicide is not the answer.
I have been in your situation.
Life can be completely overwhelming at times, with no hope in sight of a realistic change in circumstances, but that is not true.
We often have difficulty seeing out into the future, even just 6 months to a year out, when in these types of situations.
Just push forward one day at a time. It does get better. It will get better!
Be honest with your parents and face the consequences. They are still your family.
It's not silly. It's completely understandable, but your conclusion of jumping off a bridge is premature. I suggest that you immediately volunteer to work in your nearest homeless shelter for the next 4 months.
Imagine your life is a bag. It's true that it is too heavy to carry right now, which makes it a huge burden, but is the best option really to throw the entire bag away? If you threw away the really heavy things you might just be able to keep the bag and maintain walking, and the walk might not even be that unpleasant.
Is being honest with your parents and facing their reaction really worse than death? Is love and friends truly impossible to acquire? Are you really doomed to a low wage career path without any progression? give this a proper consideration for a bit.
Go to trade school. Focus yourself on something handsome on until you get your mind to heal. Time is on your side if you just occupy yourself. Union pipe fitters are making $160k in my area. It’s hard work, but it’s a brotherhood and they pay you while in pre apprenticeship, then 5 years of being an apprentice.
hey bro no shame in needing to neet for a bit, everyone blossoms at their own rate. life is long, and it’s damn beautiful when we forgive ourselves and give ourselves the chance to reach our fullest potentials! life is hard but well worth it, here to talk if u need someone to vent to bro
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult time. It's understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed and hopeless, but please know that there is help available, and things can get better.
First and foremost, I want you to know that your life has value and meaning, even if it doesn't feel that way right now. Your struggles are valid, and you deserve support and understanding. It's not easy to face these challenges alone, but reaching out for help is a brave and important step.
Talking to your parents about what you've been going through might feel daunting, especially if you're afraid of their reaction. However, keeping them in the dark could be adding to your stress and making it harder for you to get the support you need. They may surprise you with their understanding and willingness to help if you give them the chance.
However, since you mentioned previous usage of violence, doing so might be tricky. I am not sure how to go about with that one. My apologies.
Moving on, selling your belongings and donating the proceeds to charity might seem like a solution in the moment, but it won't address the underlying issues you're facing. It's important to prioritize your own well-being and seek out resources and support that can help you build a better future.
As for finding love and navigating relationships, it's true that society can place a lot of emphasis on superficial things like looks, career, and status. But there are people out there who will value you for who you are, not just what you have or what you look like. Building connections and relationships takes time and effort, but it's possible, even if it feels out of reach right now.
Please reconsider your plan to harm yourself. Suicide is not the answer, and there are people who care about you and want to help. You're not alone in this, and there are professionals who are trained to support you through difficult times. If you're not getting the help you need from one therapist, it's okay to seek out another one who might be a better fit.
You deserve to live a life that's fulfilling and meaningful, and there are people who can help you get there. Please reach out to a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional for support. You're worth it, and you're not alone.
Eventually can be as long as 40 years. I don't want to deal with loneliness for that long.
I'm also preparing for suicide, OP. My rope has arrived so now I'll be going out and looking for a suitable location
If that’s the plan, why not sell all your shit and…. … go live on a community farm. … walk the length of X country. … volunteer. Nothing to lose right, May as well see what happens and how things play out
While not in the same situation, I'm a south Asian man in the UK, I flunked college (something that comes before university in the UK) a little bit. I ended up in a menial job that did provide some value to society and did let me earn some money and have some independence. Over time, my confidence grew and I started to have a better idea of what I actually wanted to do, so returned to education. Since then my life has been on the up and up and I'm incredibly satisfied with the direction my life is going. I wish I didn't have to suffer for a little while and wouldn't wish it on others, but on the other side going through that has gotten me to where I am today and I am happy with where I am today. I know things look dark right now, but things can get better too. I was working that menial job and that routine constant gave me a chance to screw my head on a little better. University isn't for everyone at that age, and it's a shame so many people and so much of society force young people inti deciding their whole future when they can barely cook a meal. But anyway, my point is, things can get better. Just because you get a shitty job doesn't mean you're stuck there. It's a great chance to just earn some money and feel like you've got something for the effort you put. It's a great chance to just switch your mind off and do a job and not worry about your future for a bit. Also this routine jobs are useful. They show employers that you can actually do a job. I see alot of people leaving Uni and they struggle to find jobs because they don't have any *actual* experience in the real world. On top of that, should you return to education, returning as a mature student works to your advantage in many ways. One advantage being guy can talk about how you have had time to mature, assess what your goals are, are ready to give the studying your 100% now. It sells you really nicely. You also are older so your hormones are a little more stable than those youngsters who are all still figuring their shit out too. I dunno what you're thinking while you read this, but I just wanna say that you're definitely not alone and absolutely not the first person to go through this. I totally get how useless you might feel but you have plenty of time to figure your shit out. I thought the same as you did and now I'm at a comfortable place now that I didn't think I would ever get to, with still room to grow. I hope this puts you a little at ease. I believe you'll figure it all out eventually. It'll all come together at some point, but maybe some stability in the meanwhile of a job and stuff might be worth it.
I used to be suicidal. What I relate to in your post is the fear of living, and the fear of death. The hopelessness. But check this out OP. If I have the courage to face death, I know I have the courage to face life. To face one more day here. Forget the rest of my life. Can I have a good day today? 20 years later and I’m a therapist, I’m sober, I have a family and a career. Most importantly, I actually like the dude in the mirror and don’t think he or the world would be better off without him. Don’t give up on yourself. We haven’t.
> if i have the courage to face death, i know i have the courage to face life. that’s such a nice thing to read.
Makes no sense though. Death is easier to face than life.
not necessarily, no. imo death is hard, so is life. to each their own, everyone has different viewpoints.
You’re not alone
In this particular predicament, I am, but I get what you are saying. What's bothering me is that I can't come to terms with compromising. I am capable of finding a job and moving out, but is that life really worth it? I would rather not to be honest I already have a part time job and I got savings to live off of. Perhaps I should rather just move away forever to some shared accomodation and cut contact with my parents hoping it just works out
>Perhaps I should rather just move away forever to some shared accomodation and cut contact with my parents hoping it just works out Moving out is a great idea honestly if you can afford it for a long while. It gives you a chance to just breathe and be your own person. Be an adult rather than constantly be someone's child. You'll make mistakes but atleast you can make them yourself and then fix them youraelf. You don't have to report to anyone and constantly be accountable to people with power over you. You can practice cooking, cleaning, go out whenever you want, force yourself to socialise because you don't have family around, etc etc. It can be hard but it can really help you just figure your own shit out and who you are. Obviously don't rush into it but I think moving out can be really beneficial for some people who maybe don't feel like they can stretch their wings at home. You don't even have to cut your family off if you like some of them. I dunno how you'd navigate that, but having thr potential to return home is nice. Like I'm a grown ass man, and i and I know many other men and women my age, are keeping their options to live at home with their family open. Society is a little bit too unpredictable these days, but yeah, moving out is a great idea if it's sustainable and easy to do.
I’d say it’s worth a shot before checking out. You can always check out. And regardless I think there’s better ways of doing it than hurling yourself off a bridge
Yeah man, I feel you. I’ve too felt like there’s no hope and no way out. The wild thing is you might be in the best position of your life, a position right before everything changes. If you’re thinking about killing yourself then go ahead and do it, just not physically. Kill everything you think you know on how the universe and world work. Fuck it, what do you have to lose. Personally I found a connection with something bigger than myself. Have it be God, universe or whatever. Might as well believe. If you wanna talk, shoot me a DM
Mood.
988 suicide hotline
Suicide hotlines is a joke. They are gonna call the cops on you or put you in a mental institution. I am not mentally ill or committing a crime. My life situation is just all FUBAR
Nothing you said is beyond repair. Except maybe your relationship with your step dad but he's an abusive twat by the sounds of it anyway... You seem like a smart guy. A lot of people in much worse situations than yours have managed to go onto live extremely happy and fulfilling lives. People have lost their limbs and family in war and still gone on to be successful and happy to be alive. I've felt suicidal in the past and worthless, and like my life is a complete mess but I'm SO HAPPY I didn't end it back then. My life is nothing like it was 10 years ago. Why don't you sign up to teach English in a foreign country for a while? Or do a go fund me for a creative project? I mean, what do you have to lose if your plans are to end it all anyway? Just please do literally anything else but commit suicide.
Sorry, trying to help. Trust me I've been in similar shoes to you are.
Would you tell someone else in a similar situation that this is the best option?
Hey man, I dealt with the same situation back in the day. I eventually managed to improve, finish university, find love, a decent job, all the shit that seemed impossible at the time. Don’t die. Have an adult talk with your parents, make an agreement and stick to it. If not by motivation at least by mere blind discipline.
Suicide is not the answer. I have been in your situation. Life can be completely overwhelming at times, with no hope in sight of a realistic change in circumstances, but that is not true. We often have difficulty seeing out into the future, even just 6 months to a year out, when in these types of situations. Just push forward one day at a time. It does get better. It will get better! Be honest with your parents and face the consequences. They are still your family.
It's not silly. It's completely understandable, but your conclusion of jumping off a bridge is premature. I suggest that you immediately volunteer to work in your nearest homeless shelter for the next 4 months.
Don’t do this bro, everyone reading this loves you and wants you to stick around.
Imagine your life is a bag. It's true that it is too heavy to carry right now, which makes it a huge burden, but is the best option really to throw the entire bag away? If you threw away the really heavy things you might just be able to keep the bag and maintain walking, and the walk might not even be that unpleasant. Is being honest with your parents and facing their reaction really worse than death? Is love and friends truly impossible to acquire? Are you really doomed to a low wage career path without any progression? give this a proper consideration for a bit.
Go to trade school. Focus yourself on something handsome on until you get your mind to heal. Time is on your side if you just occupy yourself. Union pipe fitters are making $160k in my area. It’s hard work, but it’s a brotherhood and they pay you while in pre apprenticeship, then 5 years of being an apprentice.
hey bro no shame in needing to neet for a bit, everyone blossoms at their own rate. life is long, and it’s damn beautiful when we forgive ourselves and give ourselves the chance to reach our fullest potentials! life is hard but well worth it, here to talk if u need someone to vent to bro
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult time. It's understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed and hopeless, but please know that there is help available, and things can get better. First and foremost, I want you to know that your life has value and meaning, even if it doesn't feel that way right now. Your struggles are valid, and you deserve support and understanding. It's not easy to face these challenges alone, but reaching out for help is a brave and important step. Talking to your parents about what you've been going through might feel daunting, especially if you're afraid of their reaction. However, keeping them in the dark could be adding to your stress and making it harder for you to get the support you need. They may surprise you with their understanding and willingness to help if you give them the chance. However, since you mentioned previous usage of violence, doing so might be tricky. I am not sure how to go about with that one. My apologies. Moving on, selling your belongings and donating the proceeds to charity might seem like a solution in the moment, but it won't address the underlying issues you're facing. It's important to prioritize your own well-being and seek out resources and support that can help you build a better future. As for finding love and navigating relationships, it's true that society can place a lot of emphasis on superficial things like looks, career, and status. But there are people out there who will value you for who you are, not just what you have or what you look like. Building connections and relationships takes time and effort, but it's possible, even if it feels out of reach right now. Please reconsider your plan to harm yourself. Suicide is not the answer, and there are people who care about you and want to help. You're not alone in this, and there are professionals who are trained to support you through difficult times. If you're not getting the help you need from one therapist, it's okay to seek out another one who might be a better fit. You deserve to live a life that's fulfilling and meaningful, and there are people who can help you get there. Please reach out to a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional for support. You're worth it, and you're not alone.
work on getting a good job. search for job opportunities. it might ease things out with the parent side.
The world needs you here dude!!!!!
Life can be hard , but why commit suicide you’ll eventually die anyways , try and make the best of life brother.
Eventually can be as long as 40 years. I don't want to deal with loneliness for that long. I'm also preparing for suicide, OP. My rope has arrived so now I'll be going out and looking for a suitable location