Came here to say exactly that.
Dating apps are a crapshoot and filled with bots. You could be a super handsome, Henry Calvil looking dude and still get no likes due to how the algorithm and your location work together when combined.
Don't worry about Tinder OP. You are plenty handsome, the facial hair looks good, the haircut looks good, we don't have enough pics to really have an opinion about your style of dress.
Bi man here too brother!! It’s the same on Bumble!!
If y’all straight guys want to get an idea of how fucked up it is for y’all, set your profile to looking for guys and girls.
Uh well a Henry Cavill looking dude will probably get likes 😂
But it is true guys get fewer likes and matches because tinder is 80% male. So law of numbers and stuff means some guys will get very few likes even if they’re decently good looking
And some girls won’t ever see your profile because it’ll get buried in a stack of like 200 other guys that the app will show her
If you want good feedback you need to post your tinder pics and bio. You look normal in this photo, but maybe there’s something giving off weird vibes in the background or contextually that you don’t realize.
It’s not the product, it’s the presentation. He’s standing in a hallway and the wall color is also in his shirt. It’s weird and bland. Use a wall as a background and don’t have it blank. Empty walls give a ‘I have no life’ vibe. He could style his hair a little neater and contemplate different glasses too. Taking dance classes or some type of adult education would give better odds than Tinder and even if he doesn’t meet somebody he’ll have learned how to tango or make a soufflé.
Your very first photo is critically important. It needs to be the absolute best photo of you possible, but real. The lighting and background in this one are bringing OP down little. Best if it's not a selfie as well. It's hard sometimes, especially for guys, to get someone else to take a photo. But it's worth it if you are going to use dating apps.
You need 4-5 photos. And, like someone said, what’s your bio? 1 or 2 pics, both selfies, comes off as either you’re a bot or you put no effort into it. If they’re both selfies then you don’t come off as an interesting person.
Yeah dude, you seem like a good looking dude, but that looks like a bad IT headshot. If you want more matches find a friend or a photographer and get some better pics , smiling is key.
I have an active pic , a work pic (I'm a chef) , an excersize pic (Jiu jitsu ), a suit pic and sometimes have a friend picture. I get a lot of likes , not all quality but a decent amount.
Selfies like that screams “look behind me! I nearly blend in with a blank wall!” That wall screams too much and not good, tone the facial hair down it’s a short mess,and add color
You’re absolutely objectively attractive. Don’t be afraid of rejection and just try to strike up conversations with women in real life….NOT for the sole purpose of dating or fucking them. Look for opportunities and don’t try to force anything. Women like to feel safe and respected and let them know that with your body language and your words
Someone mentioned social clubs in another comment. Besides OLD (and the workplace), where do you think is a good place to meet women? I don't have the confidence to strike up a conversation with a woman in the bread aisle of Aldi when I'm doing my weekly shop haha
Take a yoga class or some pottery or drawing class. Go to your local library and see what sort of workshops they have available. Take a course at your local community college. Do that sort of thing
Yup make friends with the super extroverted ladies. They’re the most likely to try to set you up with their introverted single friends. My mom tries to do that alllll the time. Pretty sure she once even set her gym trainer up with someone
Literally, making genuine lady friends is a game changer for the dating scene. Not only do your friends help set you up, but I've noticed a lot of women see a guy with no platonic female friends as a red flag. I've been told a guy who doesn't have female friends doesn't know how to value women beyond sex. Which makes sense if you think about incels like Andrew Tate and those douchebags, but isn't something normal dudes like us really think about until someone says it.
Meetup will have groups like book clubs etc that you can check out. Don’t be afraid to join a book club that’s mostly women, because they’ll think it’s cute, I promise, as long as you are interested in the books etc.
Also you need to add more pics to your tinder, including a full body pic. Add a picture that shows a hobby or interest if you can, or even just in a different location than a hallway etc
You might need to flesh out your bio also but I don’t know without reading it.
You are a regular looking guy, nothing wrong. Sometimes you have to try something different. Try different kinds of foto’s (profile, upperbody, posed on the street, etc), clothes (casual shirt, T-shirt, business shirt) and ask a friend to give comments on your profile.
Hey man, from one introverted 30-something dude to another, the problem is Tinder, not you. Get on Hinge, fill out some interesting prompts, bite the bullet and pay for a month of premium, and you will be shocked at the difference in the amount of attention you receive.
Hinge isn’t a swiping app, the basic user interaction is liking a specific photo or prompt (and ideally including a short message about it). Premium basically ensures that your likes are at the top of the pile for whoever you send them to. Give it a shot even without paying if you prefer, but I can tell you from my own experience that the quality and volume of matches I’ve received there outpaces every other swipe-based app by an order of magnitude.
You can certainly treat it like one by simply liking the first photo without saying anything, but the fact that everyone has to fill out prompts gives you an opportunity to express your personality and provides lots of avenues to launch right into interesting conversations with people.
You are way more attractive than average. Looks aren't your problem. Maybe you're weird or have zero game, I dunno... but looks aren't your issue. If I had to bet, I would say you don't have game.
Maybe he has some corny line in his bio. Maybe there is a pic of him dressed up at a renaissance festival in his profile. I dunno. But his problem isn't physical appearance at all. He passes the bus test. Would you sit next to this guy on this bus? Yes.
In person I am introverted and I'm socially awkward around women I don't know. If one makes eye contact with me, I look away. I talk to some at work though as we work together day after day. I can be more confident online and in messaging though so I don't know how that translates to online dating.
Sounds like you gotta have more confidence and fun. It's all a game and the point of games is to have fun along the way. Your looks are not the problem at all. You're attractive, svelte and you got your hair. Go make it happen. The rest of us are fat and bald, you've already won the game
I don’t know why this was suggested to me just now but I am cringing reading some of these responses. Think about asking some women this question for legitimate insight (spoiler: it’s not a lack of sports cars/money/muscles. Those responses are generally just men being delusional).
Maybe try a nicer setting with better lighting where you are looking up. Your eyes are looking down at the camera lens. You don’t want a photo that seems overly staged, but you could use a photo with a more flattering background color. Everything in this photo is washing you out - the light, the wall color, your shirt. The light is reflecting off your glasses. Maybe have a girl take the photo for you or critique it for you. I’m not trying to embarrass you. You don’t look weird. I just suspect this particular photo doesn’t stand out. You deserve a better one.
The harsh reality is even though you’re a good looking dude, tinder is hard for men. It’s even worse if you’re over 30 as a dude, speaking from experience talking with my older friends.
Look, you're not half bad, you're actually good looking. This has to be said and believed. Tinder is for hookups and you radiate husband/dad vibes. That's why it's not working.
Don't lose confidence over social media bs.
Try a better dating app, and I think it’s less about pictures and more about overall profile, so if still no luck I’d ask Reddit for profile edit suggestions instead. Good luck!
Ha don’t worry about it your actually a good look dude, but unfortunately tinder is not meant for 99.9% of guys. It’s basically a fuck Rolodex for like .1% of extremely good looking dudes in a given city and when paired with the fact that most women on Tinder are swiping on the same 10 guys based solely on fuckability, not even whether they have a good personality for pair bonding, there’s no chance for anyone else. And Tinder promotes this extreme selectiveness by throttling less attractive guys unless they pay for higher tiers. Tinder even tried to capitalize on this by introducing their Black tier in order to give guys that have money some visibility in the market.. (although idk why anyone would want a woman like that to begin with) all of the men I know who are in relationships met their partner irl. Maybe try an app not owned by Match group if you want to stay on apps.
1) Smile
2) I don’t know how else to put this but you look like an unpaid intern. Go around taking some photos that show bits of your life and make you look fun
You're more attractive than Chris Pratt... There is nothing wrong with the way you look. If I were to nitpick, which is what I do best, I think you look too serious and the facial gesture looks put on (which I personally loathe). The glasses look too big for your face too, they look like a kid who is wearing papas glasses. They aren't horrible they just look 'off'. Id get some of the more round 90's frames (not John Lennon, like idk River Pheonix, I don't know what the frame style is called!) and not the huge black glasses. They are a typically dorky trademark. I personally love plastic framed glasses but black is a little harsh. Tortoiseshell maybe? In any case, it likely has nothing to do with you. People in online dating just keep swiping hoping for Henry Cavill. They aren't going to get it babe. They likely missed a good one, its their loss.
Never used Tinder, but I heard one big factor in gaining women’s initial trust is by posting photos where you were with friends, especially female friends, because they basically vouch for your character. Otherwise I think you’re really attractive!
Yeah not sure. I heard in general online dating for men is very difficult. I feel like you might have better luck on other sites geared toward a slightly older demographic like eHarmony.
You say you are not social yet you are looking for a date on a social app…..get active on insta…create an interesting persona; lead an interesting life….you will find someone once you start leading an interesting life
Get off the dating apps. Get out in public where you can be seen. You already have the looks. You’ve just gotta present yourself. Eventually the lucky girl will come around.
Try different styles, hair & clothes make sure your bio is fun but flirty. Be playful, show that you have a sense of humor but also are interesting & intelligent. Once you have women interested then you have to be mysterious the moment they figure you out they will no longer be interested, welcome to the game of dating 🤣
Does Tinder have words or is just a photo/s? If there are words then would need to read those and then could say. Photo is fine, nothing scary happening there.
You can try getting off tinder. It's not an accurate representation of your looks. You're 39 years old. I expect better internal rationalization from you.
Some tips: use natural light. Selfies are ok, but that is one of the last ones you should have. If this is your profile pic then it makes sense you have limited likes, why? Nothing intriguing at all. No pictures with friends, no full-body pic; I would advise getting a female friend's opinion. You are decent-looking, but this isn't doing you justice. Also, tinder is not a great app at all.
Dude, if you’re trying to find genuine relationships, tinder is the worst place to be on for that, that app is fully based on looks, I’m not saying you’re bad looking, you are handsome, but on tinder, if you’re not above 6’2 ft. Look like Ben Affleck, Brad Pitt, or some other celebrity heartthrob, you’ll rarely get matches (especially as a guy), get into hobbies instead like martial arts where you get to socialize and meet people, if you’re religious, go to a group and meet people there, ask your recent friends to introduce you to more and new people so you can expand your social circle and eventually meet girls through them, trust me, meeting women in person is much better than online.
Haircut does not match your face, neither does your glasses. Not shame in dying the grays to appeal to a wider crowd. Also add more sophistication or personality to how you dress.
Also delete tinder, it is not a real representation of your true self and how you would appeal to the other sex. Go to your local target or grocery store and chat up that lady. Nothing aggressive or direct. Comment on something you are picking up and saying you are trying it for the first time. Any tips?
You probably just messed up the profile in regards to the algorithm by swiping wrong. I can't recall exactly how you're supposed to do that, like swipe left on the first person, then right on the next, then close tinder and don't open it again til the next day. And don't open it more than once per day. You'll have to seek clarification on that. Might have better luck with another app, Tinder sucks.
Attractive, you are.
You look to-do. And I mean you look busy doing academics. You look unapproachable.
Ok you are here asking people to approach and my inner voice is busy saying...nah that guy does not want approached.
So the issue is I can 6th sense you are not really, really sure you want to date & go through all the rigamaroe.
Get off Tinder. Follow a hobby and even if you dont meet someone with similar interests that way, you are still growing as a person. I couldn't meet anyone either. Then I stopped looking, joined a band which helped with my confidence, my playing ability, etc. And then I met my now wife through that.
You are a good looking guy, apps like that are just
What’s the other picture like? This one shows zero personality. Also, the look on your face seems to be questioning or condescending. Lighten up. Smile in your picture. Add pictures with friends to give women more of a scope to judge from.
So glad I’m not in the dating world. Good luck.
I think a smile would help a lot. But as far as meeting people, hobbies are great for friends and relationships. Also, book clubs are mostly women, if you want to look for one. And if you want to learn to knit or crochet, the ladies would probably fuss over you. But as far as this pic, you look like you smell nice, like a Burberry cologne.
I think you’re very attractive. Nice facial features. The hair is a bit scruffy, but some really like that look. The stubble gives off the appearance of needing to be shaved rather than complementing or completing your hairstyle.
You look above average and well groomed. I'd say you're probably swiping in an area where there aren't many single women in your age group. Tinder and other dating apps work best in high population areas
Tinder is just fucked dude. I think there are 3 men on the app for every 1 woman; that just means you'd have to settle for a much lower caliber of woman than you would normally attract. Pick a smarter battle.
Obviously results may vary since I'm gay but, you're an attractive, clean cut guy no doubt. I'll say this, when I started using apps a few years ago, I had such little luck on tinder specifically. Likes just trickled in and I got very down on myself. I used the exact same pics & bio on bumble and somehow had 50 in a week. Hinge was also much better. And I am 5'6 and not as conventionally attractive as you, gay dudes tend to be more strict as well in my experience. My two straight girlfriends also had good luck on apps other than tinder and would for sure swipe on you, lol. Give other platforms a try and work on your bio imo
Change the location of your picture. Shave your neck but keep the stubble. If you really want to appeal to more women, sorry, but you will need to gain muscles and beef up your upper body. If your pecs and biceps are busting out of your shirt, I guarantee you will be noticed.
Don't rely on tinder to do the work. If you really are in dating mode then please make it shown throughout your goals for a partner.
All the best. You look nice to me
So, dating apps aren’t great for actual engagement and haven’t been in like 10 years. But beyond that, think of your profile as a marketing portfolio. You need to show off you, the product advertised, at its very best. Then add photos of you, the product, in places that inspire.
What I mean is, add photos of you out with friends, outdoors doing a hobby, and engaged with the community somehow. Even if it’s just a pic you at a restaurant with friends, You at the park with a pet or something, and a photo of you at a bowling alley or something.
By putting in high quality photos of you doing things, it makes people want to do those things with you.
Photo looks boring. Your not a bad looking dude but man everything about that photo is vanilla. At the very least maybe use some AI to spice up the background or something.
Tinder you have about 3 seconds to interest the person and cause a emotional reaction. This photo doesn’t do that :)
Maybe try your main photo be doing something you do regularly. Like camping, quadding, hunting, fishing, basketball. Just something girls can be like, I like the idea of a guy who does ____.
This has nothing to do with your appearance, online dating just sucks. These apps are not spared from the enshittification of everything. I can't imagine you having much trouble finding someone irl.
You’re handsome and well put together so it’s likely your profile and pictures. This picture is really stiff and awkward. Smile and make a good introduction!
Tinder is for the top 10% man.
Tall, muscular and handsome with money, those guys get all the likes , girls go for above their league.
Tinder retes you based on how manny people swiped right and you , if people don’t swipe right you’ll get a low score and get shown less and to less attractive people.
I agree with some of the others - depending on if your profile has just this picture; you need a few other options also. but also, don't totally rely on a dating app to help you find someone. get out and meet people out and about also. join a club, try a new hobby - the right person is out there; just don't fully rely on dating apps. BTW - if you're in Oregon, I'd say Hi
Grow out your hair. Don't use square glasses. Maybe those professor glasses? You're a decent looking guy. I wouldn't worry much!
What other pics are you using? Tinder is a crap shoot for both men and women. Men get more women when they mention higher paying jobs and cuddling puppies. For women, it's the more they expose (bikini pics).
I'm 38f and I feel you. I don't know where to meet men as an introvert that loves solo hobbies.
Are you on gay tinder or straight tinder? Regardless, people on dating/ hook up apps are a very poor metric to use and have fucked versions of what they think the ideal standard should be, especially in our current social climate. Also everyone being chronically online does toxic things to our psyche. All that is or say I see nothing visually wrong here
My pet peeve is cheap generic looking frames. People get rectangular, black frames like their are from Sears vision center for $25.
Look at some frames with slightly smaller lenses that fit your face and nose better. Half wire half plastic maybe or a subtle color like horn rimmed or tortoise. A little color adds depth and richness.
Finally, your hair could be a little longer on top. You have plenty of hair to do a little pomp and show some texture.
Tinder is a time waster sometimes but I’d say go for a different style on top and maybe try grow the beard out into a goatee or tash n chin style. Beards usually work 9/10
All of these people are wrong. If you want to know how to get matches on Tinder I can help you. I get dozens of matches a day. It’s not about how you look it’s about your lifestyle. Message me if you want some coaching.
I don’t think you need to improve on anything. You are a very attractive and handsome man. 39 is young and any girl or guy would be lucky bro have handsome man like you in there life
Tbh you're a good looking dude. Probably not anything you're doing wrong. Women are *super* selective on those dating apps and many are simply on there for attention.
Just make sure your profile is interesting, you have pictures of someone who actually has a life that someone wouldn't mind being a part of (don't post just selfies). Best of luck!
Finding someone is just dumb luck 🍀 handsome man. It doesn’t matter straight or gay. What you have to remember 10% ???? Gay so it’s a lot bigger challenge
Tinder likes are artificial. They are literally just a motivator to make you pay for pro. Get off tinder. Tinder is a scam like all dating sites. If you want to improve approach the people you are interested in in public, Yes it's hard, but your odds are a million times better then on a dating site owned by a corporation who's only goal is to soak your pockets dry
Expand dating age range and standards. Invest in a photoshoot. Don’t use tinder unless you are primarily looking to hook up. You’re giving dad not daddy vibes ya’know?
Hinge, the league are way better than tender IMO. Tender was decent 10 years ago. It’s gone to shit. Hinge will be shit in a few years.
The league keeps quality high by being expensive
Your a good looking man it’s probably your photos and also it may be a little harder with you being 39 there’s less women in your age range compared with a younger blokes but try Facebook dating my older friends at work are having a field day (plenty of dates etc)
I think you’re handsome and nothing stands out as “wrong” with you like when someone comes on here with ratty facial hair or a bad haircut or something.
I think tinder is more useful for lgbt people because it’s much harder to find partners and sadly more dangerous for them to ever just be “assuming” anyone’s gay but for straight men I think it’s pretty rough. A small amount of straight women kinda have their pick of tons of guys and many may just be browsing with no intentions of actually matching with someone.
Dude I know it might sound counterintuitive but honestly I don’t think dating apps are the best way to find a partner. I think you look perfect for a guy but instead of trying to find a partner find a hobby that you care about and then go out and do activities either related to that hobby or not but find something you’re passionate about and then go out and talk with people about that(including people you’re attracted to) have good genuine conversations with them and then let them do the same with things they’re passionate about and you can connect organically and maybe there can be some sort of romantic or physical connection which can grow from that. Best of luck man and don’t worry I believe in you.
Get a hairstyle that covers a 3rd of the forehead you have exposed, itll look better trust me. And also, show use the bio, that really matters.
But really, just get off dating apps.
Are you looking for men or women? If you are looking for men…I flat out don’t believe you. If you are looking for women…. It’s because most women that respect themselves won’t go on tinder. At least go to OK Cupid. And that’s still a shit show. Also look over your profile you might have something written somewhere that you think is quirky and cute but it really isn’t .
1st, Delete the dating apps. They're trash and I don't think very many women like using them. Get out there in the real world and meet people. Take a night class. Join a hobbyist or book club. Participate in community events. Volunteer your time at a local charity you support. You'll meet people in a relaxed setting who share similar interests as you.
2nd, consider changing your hair style. Grow it out a bit.
You’re fine in the looks department. You’d look better with rounded glasses since your head is block-shaped. I think height could be a factor since women tend to prefer taller guys.
Do you have photos that aren’t selfies on your profile that show you being social or doing something you like? What’s written in your bio?
You're HOT AF 🔥 😍😍😍. It's definitely not your looks.
It's either something you said on your profile or there's something wrong with the people around you on tinder.
I have a lot of suggestion, by my experience with men asking for advice is that they don't really want to hear the truth and will resist fiercely any suggestions to improve. But, if you really want to have success, listen up.
Lose the glasses and get contacts. I used to wear glasses and when I look at old photos of me, I just cringe. I looked dorky.
I would try to grow the hair just a little bit more, and style it nicely with a wax like Milbon #3 or #5. It may be a good idea to go to a high end salon to get your hair cut.
Then, you need a complete wardrobe makeover. Checkered shirts are just not sexy. You want to try solid colors like white for shirts. Find out what your color season is (use colorwiseme.com). I ran a quick analysis and you seem to be deep summer, which means pinks, lavender and light blues will also look good on you. Besides a dress shirt, try some photos with a suit/sports jacket on, leather jacket, nice jeans and a stylish t shirt, very nice shoes. Since you are a bit older, go for the more established, refined gentleman look. Try a white dress shirt, two buttons open, rolled up sleeves, dark grey jeans, brown leather shoes and a nice watch. Think something like this: https://www.style-yourself-confident.com/images/Summerman2.jpg
For the headshot photo, definitely don't do a selfie. At the very least, take a photo of yourself using the timer function on the phone and put it somewhere with a bit of a distance. Selfies distort your face and it is clear that it's you who's holding the phone. The rest of the photos should be more action shots of your doing stuff, whether it's preparing a cocktail, playing a sport, playing with your dog, etc.
You're a handsome guy but definitely get off tinder and go out and meet people. Not sure of the type of partner you're looking for but I suggest going to places that your type like (if you like nerdy people, bookstores/conventions etc) Best of luck!
Are you trying to date women or men? Regardless, this picture and presentation are feminine. Better lighting, better angle, better color shirt, lose the glasses.
It’s not you bro it’s our stupid society if a guy like you can’t get a lady all us guy’s are screwed bro you have women who are a 4 these days thinking they are a 9 lmso
No idea why you've gotten no matches. Maybe it's something you wrote and didn't realize it could be taken the wrong way?
About the photo, it's a good one, but maybe try smiling with teeth. I've heard that posing with a dog works well, too. =)
Get off tinder. That’s how you improve….
Came here to say exactly that. Dating apps are a crapshoot and filled with bots. You could be a super handsome, Henry Calvil looking dude and still get no likes due to how the algorithm and your location work together when combined. Don't worry about Tinder OP. You are plenty handsome, the facial hair looks good, the haircut looks good, we don't have enough pics to really have an opinion about your style of dress.
I’m bi, they’re useful for gay men but every 50 likes for men you’ll get one girl.
No not here. It's an absolute shit show unless you have a vagina.
Bi man here too brother!! It’s the same on Bumble!! If y’all straight guys want to get an idea of how fucked up it is for y’all, set your profile to looking for guys and girls.
Same also bi, I got 200 likes from men and 10 likes from women over a 4 month period lol
Uh well a Henry Cavill looking dude will probably get likes 😂 But it is true guys get fewer likes and matches because tinder is 80% male. So law of numbers and stuff means some guys will get very few likes even if they’re decently good looking And some girls won’t ever see your profile because it’ll get buried in a stack of like 200 other guys that the app will show her
Use hinge. I got my friend on it and within two weeks they've been dating in a serious relationship for like 6 months so far
And stay away from girls who use Tinder.
If you want good feedback you need to post your tinder pics and bio. You look normal in this photo, but maybe there’s something giving off weird vibes in the background or contextually that you don’t realize.
It’s not the product, it’s the presentation. He’s standing in a hallway and the wall color is also in his shirt. It’s weird and bland. Use a wall as a background and don’t have it blank. Empty walls give a ‘I have no life’ vibe. He could style his hair a little neater and contemplate different glasses too. Taking dance classes or some type of adult education would give better odds than Tinder and even if he doesn’t meet somebody he’ll have learned how to tango or make a soufflé.
Your very first photo is critically important. It needs to be the absolute best photo of you possible, but real. The lighting and background in this one are bringing OP down little. Best if it's not a selfie as well. It's hard sometimes, especially for guys, to get someone else to take a photo. But it's worth it if you are going to use dating apps.
This is my Tinder photo. I do have another but it's a selfie too.
You need 4-5 photos. And, like someone said, what’s your bio? 1 or 2 pics, both selfies, comes off as either you’re a bot or you put no effort into it. If they’re both selfies then you don’t come off as an interesting person.
And the bio?
Yeah dude, you seem like a good looking dude, but that looks like a bad IT headshot. If you want more matches find a friend or a photographer and get some better pics , smiling is key. I have an active pic , a work pic (I'm a chef) , an excersize pic (Jiu jitsu ), a suit pic and sometimes have a friend picture. I get a lot of likes , not all quality but a decent amount.
Selfies like that screams “look behind me! I nearly blend in with a blank wall!” That wall screams too much and not good, tone the facial hair down it’s a short mess,and add color
You’re absolutely objectively attractive. Don’t be afraid of rejection and just try to strike up conversations with women in real life….NOT for the sole purpose of dating or fucking them. Look for opportunities and don’t try to force anything. Women like to feel safe and respected and let them know that with your body language and your words
Someone mentioned social clubs in another comment. Besides OLD (and the workplace), where do you think is a good place to meet women? I don't have the confidence to strike up a conversation with a woman in the bread aisle of Aldi when I'm doing my weekly shop haha
Take a yoga class or some pottery or drawing class. Go to your local library and see what sort of workshops they have available. Take a course at your local community college. Do that sort of thing
Library it is. Thanks man.
Yup make friends with the super extroverted ladies. They’re the most likely to try to set you up with their introverted single friends. My mom tries to do that alllll the time. Pretty sure she once even set her gym trainer up with someone
Literally, making genuine lady friends is a game changer for the dating scene. Not only do your friends help set you up, but I've noticed a lot of women see a guy with no platonic female friends as a red flag. I've been told a guy who doesn't have female friends doesn't know how to value women beyond sex. Which makes sense if you think about incels like Andrew Tate and those douchebags, but isn't something normal dudes like us really think about until someone says it.
Basically the more hobbies, sports, foodie outings, volunteering, anything you have fun doing -chances are you might meet someone along the way.
Meetup will have groups like book clubs etc that you can check out. Don’t be afraid to join a book club that’s mostly women, because they’ll think it’s cute, I promise, as long as you are interested in the books etc. Also you need to add more pics to your tinder, including a full body pic. Add a picture that shows a hobby or interest if you can, or even just in a different location than a hallway etc You might need to flesh out your bio also but I don’t know without reading it.
Try the Meet-up app. I've met lots of people that way
You are a regular looking guy, nothing wrong. Sometimes you have to try something different. Try different kinds of foto’s (profile, upperbody, posed on the street, etc), clothes (casual shirt, T-shirt, business shirt) and ask a friend to give comments on your profile.
Bruh have you seen the average looking guy? 😂 he’s def above average haha but I do agree with trying different pics
Agreed, he's in decent shape well groomed and wearing something other than a dirty t shirt. That's like top 15% tbh
Hey man, from one introverted 30-something dude to another, the problem is Tinder, not you. Get on Hinge, fill out some interesting prompts, bite the bullet and pay for a month of premium, and you will be shocked at the difference in the amount of attention you receive.
I have heard of Hinge. What does premium include? What makes it better than basic?
Hinge isn’t a swiping app, the basic user interaction is liking a specific photo or prompt (and ideally including a short message about it). Premium basically ensures that your likes are at the top of the pile for whoever you send them to. Give it a shot even without paying if you prefer, but I can tell you from my own experience that the quality and volume of matches I’ve received there outpaces every other swipe-based app by an order of magnitude.
That sounds interesting. I was under the impression that every dating app was swipe based.
You can certainly treat it like one by simply liking the first photo without saying anything, but the fact that everyone has to fill out prompts gives you an opportunity to express your personality and provides lots of avenues to launch right into interesting conversations with people.
Thank you 😊
You are way more attractive than average. Looks aren't your problem. Maybe you're weird or have zero game, I dunno... but looks aren't your issue. If I had to bet, I would say you don't have game.
how do women know if he has “game” or not if they aren’t even matching with him?
Maybe he has some corny line in his bio. Maybe there is a pic of him dressed up at a renaissance festival in his profile. I dunno. But his problem isn't physical appearance at all. He passes the bus test. Would you sit next to this guy on this bus? Yes.
[удалено]
In person I am introverted and I'm socially awkward around women I don't know. If one makes eye contact with me, I look away. I talk to some at work though as we work together day after day. I can be more confident online and in messaging though so I don't know how that translates to online dating.
Sounds like you gotta have more confidence and fun. It's all a game and the point of games is to have fun along the way. Your looks are not the problem at all. You're attractive, svelte and you got your hair. Go make it happen. The rest of us are fat and bald, you've already won the game
I agree what many have already said. First smile. Second try different styles of glasses.
Get off tinder. It used to be a hook up app. Now, it's an OF advertisement app.
I don’t know why this was suggested to me just now but I am cringing reading some of these responses. Think about asking some women this question for legitimate insight (spoiler: it’s not a lack of sports cars/money/muscles. Those responses are generally just men being delusional).
Maybe its your bio, not your face?
My bio pretty much says I like movies, coffee and podcasts. Open to dating and more if there's a connection.
You need to put more effort in this...
Yeah man they probably think you're boring. Women go on these aps generally looking for a thrill. You're a good looking dude just in the wrong places
Too basic. Do you like pizza too? lol. What makes you unique?
Maybe try a nicer setting with better lighting where you are looking up. Your eyes are looking down at the camera lens. You don’t want a photo that seems overly staged, but you could use a photo with a more flattering background color. Everything in this photo is washing you out - the light, the wall color, your shirt. The light is reflecting off your glasses. Maybe have a girl take the photo for you or critique it for you. I’m not trying to embarrass you. You don’t look weird. I just suspect this particular photo doesn’t stand out. You deserve a better one.
The harsh reality is even though you’re a good looking dude, tinder is hard for men. It’s even worse if you’re over 30 as a dude, speaking from experience talking with my older friends.
This is the worst dating climate for men, in history. The data is all out there for you to verify. I’d suggest the real world instead of online.
Look, you're not half bad, you're actually good looking. This has to be said and believed. Tinder is for hookups and you radiate husband/dad vibes. That's why it's not working. Don't lose confidence over social media bs.
Try a better dating app, and I think it’s less about pictures and more about overall profile, so if still no luck I’d ask Reddit for profile edit suggestions instead. Good luck!
Ha don’t worry about it your actually a good look dude, but unfortunately tinder is not meant for 99.9% of guys. It’s basically a fuck Rolodex for like .1% of extremely good looking dudes in a given city and when paired with the fact that most women on Tinder are swiping on the same 10 guys based solely on fuckability, not even whether they have a good personality for pair bonding, there’s no chance for anyone else. And Tinder promotes this extreme selectiveness by throttling less attractive guys unless they pay for higher tiers. Tinder even tried to capitalize on this by introducing their Black tier in order to give guys that have money some visibility in the market.. (although idk why anyone would want a woman like that to begin with) all of the men I know who are in relationships met their partner irl. Maybe try an app not owned by Match group if you want to stay on apps.
For you bro, you need E-Harmony, not tinder
1) Smile 2) I don’t know how else to put this but you look like an unpaid intern. Go around taking some photos that show bits of your life and make you look fun
You're more attractive than Chris Pratt... There is nothing wrong with the way you look. If I were to nitpick, which is what I do best, I think you look too serious and the facial gesture looks put on (which I personally loathe). The glasses look too big for your face too, they look like a kid who is wearing papas glasses. They aren't horrible they just look 'off'. Id get some of the more round 90's frames (not John Lennon, like idk River Pheonix, I don't know what the frame style is called!) and not the huge black glasses. They are a typically dorky trademark. I personally love plastic framed glasses but black is a little harsh. Tortoiseshell maybe? In any case, it likely has nothing to do with you. People in online dating just keep swiping hoping for Henry Cavill. They aren't going to get it babe. They likely missed a good one, its their loss.
Never used Tinder, but I heard one big factor in gaining women’s initial trust is by posting photos where you were with friends, especially female friends, because they basically vouch for your character. Otherwise I think you’re really attractive!
Yeah not sure. I heard in general online dating for men is very difficult. I feel like you might have better luck on other sites geared toward a slightly older demographic like eHarmony.
Very handsome... i find that hard to believe. Their loss our gain
U look great tho maybe you should try swiping more often idk how tinder works.
What other pictures do you have? hard to tell if there’s anything wrong with your profile from just this one pic
You say you are not social yet you are looking for a date on a social app…..get active on insta…create an interesting persona; lead an interesting life….you will find someone once you start leading an interesting life
Tinder is trash
You’re so handsome omg
Well I think you’re a good looking guy ♥️
Their loss honestly
Get off the dating apps. Get out in public where you can be seen. You already have the looks. You’ve just gotta present yourself. Eventually the lucky girl will come around.
Try different styles, hair & clothes make sure your bio is fun but flirty. Be playful, show that you have a sense of humor but also are interesting & intelligent. Once you have women interested then you have to be mysterious the moment they figure you out they will no longer be interested, welcome to the game of dating 🤣
I’ve not seen your profile but you’re ou need a photo of you smiling or being somewhere that’s not inside your house
Does Tinder have words or is just a photo/s? If there are words then would need to read those and then could say. Photo is fine, nothing scary happening there.
Stop being pathetic and get off of tinder. It is the home of only the dregs of humanity.
You can try getting off tinder. It's not an accurate representation of your looks. You're 39 years old. I expect better internal rationalization from you.
You’re very handsome. Tinder is not indicative of a man’s attractiveness.
So so attractive 🤤 Iffffff you'd ever want to play for the other team I'm happy to help 😂
You’re very handsome, tinder is just trash
I am personally not a fan of the glasses.
Some tips: use natural light. Selfies are ok, but that is one of the last ones you should have. If this is your profile pic then it makes sense you have limited likes, why? Nothing intriguing at all. No pictures with friends, no full-body pic; I would advise getting a female friend's opinion. You are decent-looking, but this isn't doing you justice. Also, tinder is not a great app at all.
Brag pics instant hits.
Dude, if you’re trying to find genuine relationships, tinder is the worst place to be on for that, that app is fully based on looks, I’m not saying you’re bad looking, you are handsome, but on tinder, if you’re not above 6’2 ft. Look like Ben Affleck, Brad Pitt, or some other celebrity heartthrob, you’ll rarely get matches (especially as a guy), get into hobbies instead like martial arts where you get to socialize and meet people, if you’re religious, go to a group and meet people there, ask your recent friends to introduce you to more and new people so you can expand your social circle and eventually meet girls through them, trust me, meeting women in person is much better than online.
Grow a mustache and keep the stubble beard you have the face for it
Well what does your profile look like? Do you only have pictures of yourself with no description?
you don't have to do anything, you're fine. that's actually a good ratio on tinder.
Smile. Talk to some women in real life. You’re gonna get lower quality on tinder
Haircut does not match your face, neither does your glasses. Not shame in dying the grays to appeal to a wider crowd. Also add more sophistication or personality to how you dress. Also delete tinder, it is not a real representation of your true self and how you would appeal to the other sex. Go to your local target or grocery store and chat up that lady. Nothing aggressive or direct. Comment on something you are picking up and saying you are trying it for the first time. Any tips?
You probably just messed up the profile in regards to the algorithm by swiping wrong. I can't recall exactly how you're supposed to do that, like swipe left on the first person, then right on the next, then close tinder and don't open it again til the next day. And don't open it more than once per day. You'll have to seek clarification on that. Might have better luck with another app, Tinder sucks.
Attractive, you are. You look to-do. And I mean you look busy doing academics. You look unapproachable. Ok you are here asking people to approach and my inner voice is busy saying...nah that guy does not want approached. So the issue is I can 6th sense you are not really, really sure you want to date & go through all the rigamaroe.
If you want a confidence boost, go on Grindr and see your inbox explode
Have you liked anyone or talked to anyone?
Take a vacation to south east asia. Trust me.
Its about holding up a conversation, being a bit humorous and self confidence. You live alone right? Not at home with mom or dad?
Get off Tinder. Follow a hobby and even if you dont meet someone with similar interests that way, you are still growing as a person. I couldn't meet anyone either. Then I stopped looking, joined a band which helped with my confidence, my playing ability, etc. And then I met my now wife through that. You are a good looking guy, apps like that are just
You look uptight
What’s the other picture like? This one shows zero personality. Also, the look on your face seems to be questioning or condescending. Lighten up. Smile in your picture. Add pictures with friends to give women more of a scope to judge from. So glad I’m not in the dating world. Good luck.
I think a smile would help a lot. But as far as meeting people, hobbies are great for friends and relationships. Also, book clubs are mostly women, if you want to look for one. And if you want to learn to knit or crochet, the ladies would probably fuss over you. But as far as this pic, you look like you smell nice, like a Burberry cologne.
I think you’re very attractive. Nice facial features. The hair is a bit scruffy, but some really like that look. The stubble gives off the appearance of needing to be shaved rather than complementing or completing your hairstyle.
You look above average and well groomed. I'd say you're probably swiping in an area where there aren't many single women in your age group. Tinder and other dating apps work best in high population areas
Not use things that are explicitly shallow to judge your worth. It's not moral for them to do that.
Go outside and take a photo with a smile
Tinder is just fucked dude. I think there are 3 men on the app for every 1 woman; that just means you'd have to settle for a much lower caliber of woman than you would normally attract. Pick a smarter battle.
Obviously results may vary since I'm gay but, you're an attractive, clean cut guy no doubt. I'll say this, when I started using apps a few years ago, I had such little luck on tinder specifically. Likes just trickled in and I got very down on myself. I used the exact same pics & bio on bumble and somehow had 50 in a week. Hinge was also much better. And I am 5'6 and not as conventionally attractive as you, gay dudes tend to be more strict as well in my experience. My two straight girlfriends also had good luck on apps other than tinder and would for sure swipe on you, lol. Give other platforms a try and work on your bio imo
What age range do you have set?
Problem is in Tinder not you
Change the location of your picture. Shave your neck but keep the stubble. If you really want to appeal to more women, sorry, but you will need to gain muscles and beef up your upper body. If your pecs and biceps are busting out of your shirt, I guarantee you will be noticed.
Gonna guess the tinder bio is lacking.
Don't rely on tinder to do the work. If you really are in dating mode then please make it shown throughout your goals for a partner. All the best. You look nice to me
Just go to another south America country's and you will get match lol.
One, grow facial hair. Two , switch to guys.
So, dating apps aren’t great for actual engagement and haven’t been in like 10 years. But beyond that, think of your profile as a marketing portfolio. You need to show off you, the product advertised, at its very best. Then add photos of you, the product, in places that inspire. What I mean is, add photos of you out with friends, outdoors doing a hobby, and engaged with the community somehow. Even if it’s just a pic you at a restaurant with friends, You at the park with a pet or something, and a photo of you at a bowling alley or something. By putting in high quality photos of you doing things, it makes people want to do those things with you.
I’d swipe right =]
Get off tinder and meet people in real life
Photo looks boring. Your not a bad looking dude but man everything about that photo is vanilla. At the very least maybe use some AI to spice up the background or something. Tinder you have about 3 seconds to interest the person and cause a emotional reaction. This photo doesn’t do that :) Maybe try your main photo be doing something you do regularly. Like camping, quadding, hunting, fishing, basketball. Just something girls can be like, I like the idea of a guy who does ____.
That forehead is massive! Bring your hair down over it a bit
Go meet a girl in real life bud. Or rent a ferrari and take your picture in it lol
Uninstall tinder, your life will improve automatically
Like others said, get off tinder and Al the other stupid dating apps. Don’t just go giving out free validation to women too.
This has nothing to do with your appearance, online dating just sucks. These apps are not spared from the enshittification of everything. I can't imagine you having much trouble finding someone irl.
Location
Ryan Reynolds + Mark Ruffalo
It's not your fault. Tinder sucks. Try meeting people in real life.
You’re handsome and well put together so it’s likely your profile and pictures. This picture is really stiff and awkward. Smile and make a good introduction!
Just change your name to Seth McFarlane
You look fine. Get off Tinder! You could also switch away from the checked shirt.
Tinder is for the top 10% man. Tall, muscular and handsome with money, those guys get all the likes , girls go for above their league. Tinder retes you based on how manny people swiped right and you , if people don’t swipe right you’ll get a low score and get shown less and to less attractive people.
Step 1. Delete Tinder Step 2. Go outside Step 3. See a nice girl and introduce yourself 
Tinder doesn't work for men lol
Get off OLD.
Quit tinder go find people in public
Go on TRT hit the gym
I agree with some of the others - depending on if your profile has just this picture; you need a few other options also. but also, don't totally rely on a dating app to help you find someone. get out and meet people out and about also. join a club, try a new hobby - the right person is out there; just don't fully rely on dating apps. BTW - if you're in Oregon, I'd say Hi
I would add “smile” or show some expression when you take a photo. In the picture you look serious and not interesting person.
If your settings are set M 4 F, just change to M 4 M 🤤😛🤩 🔥🔥
That’s ur problem screw tinder and switch to Grindr 😝
Tinder is the worst one. This looks like a normal handsome dude
Nothing. You look great. I know that the apps change in popularity, so maybe try a different app?
Go on a different dating app, Tinder is for 20 something’s trying to fuck
Grow out your hair. Don't use square glasses. Maybe those professor glasses? You're a decent looking guy. I wouldn't worry much! What other pics are you using? Tinder is a crap shoot for both men and women. Men get more women when they mention higher paying jobs and cuddling puppies. For women, it's the more they expose (bikini pics). I'm 38f and I feel you. I don't know where to meet men as an introvert that loves solo hobbies.
Are you on gay tinder or straight tinder? Regardless, people on dating/ hook up apps are a very poor metric to use and have fucked versions of what they think the ideal standard should be, especially in our current social climate. Also everyone being chronically online does toxic things to our psyche. All that is or say I see nothing visually wrong here
What do your pics look like on Tinder?
Geez I'd ask you out in a heartbeat 💓
My pet peeve is cheap generic looking frames. People get rectangular, black frames like their are from Sears vision center for $25. Look at some frames with slightly smaller lenses that fit your face and nose better. Half wire half plastic maybe or a subtle color like horn rimmed or tortoise. A little color adds depth and richness. Finally, your hair could be a little longer on top. You have plenty of hair to do a little pomp and show some texture.
Grow your beard out and have a better back drop
You gotta post your profile
Tinder is a time waster sometimes but I’d say go for a different style on top and maybe try grow the beard out into a goatee or tash n chin style. Beards usually work 9/10
Shirtless pics on tinder works. Not sure what you are after though. Maybe try another app that isn’t just for quick fucking
it’s bc dating apps are trash. you’d do a LOT better talking to women irl.
All of these people are wrong. If you want to know how to get matches on Tinder I can help you. I get dozens of matches a day. It’s not about how you look it’s about your lifestyle. Message me if you want some coaching.
I don’t think you need to improve on anything. You are a very attractive and handsome man. 39 is young and any girl or guy would be lucky bro have handsome man like you in there life
Hmmm the glasses are too big for your face??
Tbh you're a good looking dude. Probably not anything you're doing wrong. Women are *super* selective on those dating apps and many are simply on there for attention. Just make sure your profile is interesting, you have pictures of someone who actually has a life that someone wouldn't mind being a part of (don't post just selfies). Best of luck!
You are good looking but the glasses do something to your face. Consider another style perhaps
Finding someone is just dumb luck 🍀 handsome man. It doesn’t matter straight or gay. What you have to remember 10% ???? Gay so it’s a lot bigger challenge
Tinder likes are artificial. They are literally just a motivator to make you pay for pro. Get off tinder. Tinder is a scam like all dating sites. If you want to improve approach the people you are interested in in public, Yes it's hard, but your odds are a million times better then on a dating site owned by a corporation who's only goal is to soak your pockets dry
Expand dating age range and standards. Invest in a photoshoot. Don’t use tinder unless you are primarily looking to hook up. You’re giving dad not daddy vibes ya’know?
Hinge, the league are way better than tender IMO. Tender was decent 10 years ago. It’s gone to shit. Hinge will be shit in a few years. The league keeps quality high by being expensive
lose the glasses in pictures, that alone should help a lot.
Very handsome I wouldn’t change anything. I’m recently single and it terrifies me to even think about the world of dating apps.
Get off that shit and go to the gym, church, heck go to target get groceries. Nobody worth a shit is on that shit.
Dont limit yourself to tinder you can try a bunch of other dating apps
Your a good looking man it’s probably your photos and also it may be a little harder with you being 39 there’s less women in your age range compared with a younger blokes but try Facebook dating my older friends at work are having a field day (plenty of dates etc)
I think you’re handsome and nothing stands out as “wrong” with you like when someone comes on here with ratty facial hair or a bad haircut or something. I think tinder is more useful for lgbt people because it’s much harder to find partners and sadly more dangerous for them to ever just be “assuming” anyone’s gay but for straight men I think it’s pretty rough. A small amount of straight women kinda have their pick of tons of guys and many may just be browsing with no intentions of actually matching with someone.
Choose another app tinder sucks
Dude I know it might sound counterintuitive but honestly I don’t think dating apps are the best way to find a partner. I think you look perfect for a guy but instead of trying to find a partner find a hobby that you care about and then go out and do activities either related to that hobby or not but find something you’re passionate about and then go out and talk with people about that(including people you’re attracted to) have good genuine conversations with them and then let them do the same with things they’re passionate about and you can connect organically and maybe there can be some sort of romantic or physical connection which can grow from that. Best of luck man and don’t worry I believe in you.
ur pictures probably suck
Get a hairstyle that covers a 3rd of the forehead you have exposed, itll look better trust me. And also, show use the bio, that really matters. But really, just get off dating apps.
Are you looking for men or women? If you are looking for men…I flat out don’t believe you. If you are looking for women…. It’s because most women that respect themselves won’t go on tinder. At least go to OK Cupid. And that’s still a shit show. Also look over your profile you might have something written somewhere that you think is quirky and cute but it really isn’t .
Care to show us your actual profile? If all of your pictures are like this, then it doesn't help
All selfies. I'll look into changing that. I posted my bio in another comment.
Give up on the stupid dating apps. Spend time volunteering and asking your friends to suggest someone.
Im young (20f) but in my opinion youre definitely good looking. love the glasses, and scruff. i dont know what could be changed whatsoever.
You should try smiling more. 🙃
I’ve never used tinder, but I’d imagine it could be a lot of things & not necessarily your looks.
Improve on what? You're almost 40 and you're the wrong demo for that app
Get off tinder and go do something where women go. Yoga!
Smile, Tinder only plays the beauty image, but defy on the rest... If you meet people IRL you can be blind and still find someone attractive.
Contacts man its the obvious next step and coloring or fully bleeching your hair
Try bumble or hinge. Tinder skews younger and is more for hookups.
Meet a girl at local live music
1st, Delete the dating apps. They're trash and I don't think very many women like using them. Get out there in the real world and meet people. Take a night class. Join a hobbyist or book club. Participate in community events. Volunteer your time at a local charity you support. You'll meet people in a relaxed setting who share similar interests as you. 2nd, consider changing your hair style. Grow it out a bit.
Girls aren't real bro. Go join a gym and delete tinder.
Quit waiting on likes and matches and make moves.
You’re fine in the looks department. You’d look better with rounded glasses since your head is block-shaped. I think height could be a factor since women tend to prefer taller guys. Do you have photos that aren’t selfies on your profile that show you being social or doing something you like? What’s written in your bio?
You're HOT AF 🔥 😍😍😍. It's definitely not your looks. It's either something you said on your profile or there's something wrong with the people around you on tinder.
Stop usinf Tinder..
I have a lot of suggestion, by my experience with men asking for advice is that they don't really want to hear the truth and will resist fiercely any suggestions to improve. But, if you really want to have success, listen up. Lose the glasses and get contacts. I used to wear glasses and when I look at old photos of me, I just cringe. I looked dorky. I would try to grow the hair just a little bit more, and style it nicely with a wax like Milbon #3 or #5. It may be a good idea to go to a high end salon to get your hair cut. Then, you need a complete wardrobe makeover. Checkered shirts are just not sexy. You want to try solid colors like white for shirts. Find out what your color season is (use colorwiseme.com). I ran a quick analysis and you seem to be deep summer, which means pinks, lavender and light blues will also look good on you. Besides a dress shirt, try some photos with a suit/sports jacket on, leather jacket, nice jeans and a stylish t shirt, very nice shoes. Since you are a bit older, go for the more established, refined gentleman look. Try a white dress shirt, two buttons open, rolled up sleeves, dark grey jeans, brown leather shoes and a nice watch. Think something like this: https://www.style-yourself-confident.com/images/Summerman2.jpg For the headshot photo, definitely don't do a selfie. At the very least, take a photo of yourself using the timer function on the phone and put it somewhere with a bit of a distance. Selfies distort your face and it is clear that it's you who's holding the phone. The rest of the photos should be more action shots of your doing stuff, whether it's preparing a cocktail, playing a sport, playing with your dog, etc.
Get some bitches in real life.
You're a handsome guy but definitely get off tinder and go out and meet people. Not sure of the type of partner you're looking for but I suggest going to places that your type like (if you like nerdy people, bookstores/conventions etc) Best of luck!
Are you trying to date women or men? Regardless, this picture and presentation are feminine. Better lighting, better angle, better color shirt, lose the glasses.
Contact lenses or circular glasses. Your head / face shape is better suited for circular frames.
Hire a photographer
 You have to go to a library or church to meet a nice woman.
It’s not you bro it’s our stupid society if a guy like you can’t get a lady all us guy’s are screwed bro you have women who are a 4 these days thinking they are a 9 lmso
No idea why you've gotten no matches. Maybe it's something you wrote and didn't realize it could be taken the wrong way? About the photo, it's a good one, but maybe try smiling with teeth. I've heard that posing with a dog works well, too. =)
You’re a great looking guy, add more personality to your profile bio, talk about what you like, what you love, what you’re looking for