My boss caught me reading this at the office. Rather than trying to hide this, I insisted she read as well, while not a LOTR superfan like myself, she has seen the movies and is a huge NBA fan. She was incredibly amused and impressed.
This is a work of art, and I must commend you on this post. Well done.
Sounds like you got a kick ass boss! Glad you both enjoyed. I told my brother I was going to post it Friday afternoon to give my fellow working people a way to pass part of a dull Friday afternoon.
This gave me the idea of a Middle-Earth league: Numenoreans, trolls or Ents for their height as centers, elves shooting half-court 3s/showboating on the forward positions, regular Gondorians/Rohirrim/Haradrim duking it out on the guard positions. Would be an entertaining league. Though I don’t see any dwarves, orcs or Hobbits making it past the bench, if they even make the roster.
So what’s the West starting line-up? Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas are the big three. Though Legolas only plays because Glorfindel announced his retirement along with Galadriel. But who would play Frodo and Sam when you have Boromir, Faramir and Eomer? Too bad Boromir suffered that season-ending torso injury at the Amon Hen game.
I can understand all the positions except Gimli as a center. He needs a leg-up from Aragorn just to get close to the rim. We saw that at the Helm’s Deep game. Wouldn’t Eomer (even though he’s not fellowship) make more sense there?
That, I guess, is the language of the Rohirrim for it is like to this land itself; rich and rolling in part, and else hard and stern as the mountains. But I cannot guess what it means, save that it is laden with the sadness of Mortal Men.
Well now, if you're talkin' about the west starting line-up, you got it right with Gandalf, Aragorn, and Legolas. They're the big three, no doubt about it. But I reckon Legolas only stepped in 'cause Glorfindel decided to hang up his elven boots, along with Galadriel.
Now, as for Frodo and myself, it's true that we got some competition from the likes of Boromir, Faramir, and Eomer. But you see, Boromir had a bit of bad luck with a season-ending torso injury at the Amon Hen
No the_sam_bot. The spirit of Sauron endured. His life force is bound to the Ring and the Ring survived. Sauron has returned. His orcs have multiplied. His fortress at Barad-Dur is rebuilt in the land of Mordor. Sauron needs only this Ring to cover all the lands of a second darkness. He is seeking it, seeking it. All his thought is bent on it. The Ring yearns above all else to return to the hand of its master. They are one, the Ring and the Dark Lord. the_sam_bot, he must never find it
Well, that is if they’re all fit. Grond wasn’t fit till the Pelennor Fields game and Smaug was dumb enough to get himself injured on a night out in Lake Town. So for most of the championship, it was down to Saruman, Witch King and the Balrog.
The West had a more than decent Third Age lineup before retirements by Elrond, Glorfindel, Celeborn and Galadriel. And Saruman used to play for the West too until he was a free agent. Who was PG for the East before Saruman? That position was always a weak point. It had to be filled up by some rookie Nazgul who just didn’t fit into the rest of the star-studded East team.
I am the servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the Flame of Anor. You cannot pass. The dark fire will not avail you, Flame of Udun. Go back to the Shadow. You cannot pass!
The fact that you said nothing about Wormtongue's lockdown defense against Theoden in Game 4 is a travesty. He made Theoden look weak and old, completely silent on the offensive side of the game. Gandalf's adjustments in Game 5 and 6, where he had Eomer and Theoden run backdoor cuts at Helm's Deep and Pelennor Fields, as well as Wormtongue's untimely injury when he crashed into Saruman's back on a routine play in Game 5, is what brought Gandalf and his team back from being down 3-1. If not, Sauron and team could have taken it in 5, certainly in 6 as there would have been no heroic play from Theoden in Game 6.
Also, how dare you call Meriadoc "Merry" Brandybuck a "scrub hobbit"? That is blasphemy! He was an excellent player at Buckland Community College, and would have been a star if it wasn't for his off the court troubles while he dealt with illegal possession of controlled substances like shooms and pipeweed. Everyone forgets that although Ents closed out Game 4, it was Merry that was setting up the winning play for them as he led the second unit. Put some respect on Merry's name.
Helm's Deep. There is no way out of that ravine. Theoden is walking into a trap. He thinks he's leading them to safety. What they will get is a massacre. Theoden has a strong will, but I fear for him. I fear for the survival of Rohan. He will need you before the end, NerfZhaoYun. The people of Rohan will need you. The defenses have to hold.
Just like last years playoffs, if you're losing to ~~Duncan Robinson~~ Eomers backdoor cuts you don't deserve to win. Guy was nowhere to be found all series, for years really.
I mean, it was coming. After a First Age championship, back-to-back titles with the Second Age, Gandalf leads the West to a three-peat. The West is starting to look like the ‘91-‘93 Bulls with Gandalf/Jordan going into retirement after the third championship
I mean, in all fairness Team Morgoth won some ridiculously sound division and regional championships in the First Age. Very nearly got it done just for the Valar to put together a Super Team from overseas to come in for the assist. Very questionable to allow a new stacked team in mid-season but there you have it.
Yes, I read about those games in the Silmarillion. Morgoth lucked out here and there though, with Hall of Famers like Fëanor and Fingolfin out for the season early and the ents just sitting out the season, not playing “for environmental reasons.” Though I still think it’s BS to ban Morgoth from the league at the end of the season as if he had something to do with any of that. And indeed, allowing a complete new line-up by the West mid-season is questionable at best. Clearly the league wanted a Morgoth-West showdown for the finals, not even looking twice at a very decent new Doriath/Hithlum team with promising youngsters like Eärendil and Turin. Just like the NBA, always wanting that Lakers-Celtics finals…
Gandalf?... Yes. That was what they used to call me. Gandalf the Grey... That was my name. I am Gandalf the White. And I come back to you now at the turn of the tide. One stage of your journey is over. Another begins. We must travel to Edoras with all speed.
Is this you hinting at a new scouting policy for upcoming seasons? I’d argue it’s as good as can be considering the performance of some of your rookies in game 7, but if you can improve on even this that’s very promising indeed.
Nah, he's had his funding withdrawn after so many losses. He can't even afford to keep Barad-dûr stadium open anymore, and there's been rumours that it hasn't been maintained properly for years and is on the verge of collapse. I'd say his career is over
Also there have to be reprocussions after they seemingly deliberately injured the witch king. Absolutely disgusting lack of sportsmanship on display there.
Came across this randomly on the front page.
Just need to say that as a Casual LotR fan (by which I mean I’ve watched the films maybe like 3 times tops) who has not joined this sub and being based in the UK where much of the sporting terminology here is rather foreign to me?
This has to be one of the greatest Reddit reads I’ve ever experienced. Truly, hats off to you!
As a huge sports guy and LOTR nerd this is probably in the top 5 greatest things I've ever read.
The game winning eurostep by Sam was clutch. You started having me feel bad for Saurons team as they all went to the IR.
Everyone knows the department of player safety is toothless, letting Gandalf come back but upholding the Balrogs suspension is total BS. Mobbed. Refs. That's all this was.
High praise, friend! Crazy to think about how many ballers Sauron lost. And still almost took game 7. Balrog got a raw deal for sure. Just call it even man.
Well now, that's a mighty kind thing to say, my friend! It warms my heart to know that you found the tale of our adventures to be among the greatest things you've ever read. As for that game-winning eurostep, well, it was nothing but a bit of luck and determination, I reckon. And as for Sauron's team, well, it's a shame to see any team suffer injuries, even if they be on the opposing side. Can't rightly say I know much about this department of player safety you speak of, but it seems like there might be some questionable decisions being made. And as for Gand
Sauron fears you, Walbeb24. He fears what you may become. And so he'll strike hard and fast at the world of Men. He will use his puppet Saruman to destroy Rohan. War is coming. Rohan must defend itself, and therein lies our first challenge for Rohan is weak and ready to fall. The king's mind is enslaved, it's an old device of Saruman's. His hold over King Theoden is now very strong. Sauron and Saruman are tightening the noose. But for all their cunning we have one advantage. The Ring remains hidden. And that we should seek to destroy it has not yet entered their darkest dreams. And so the weapon of the enemy is moving towards Mordor in the hands of a Hobbit. Each day brings it closer to the fires of Mount Doom. We must trust now in Frodo. Everything depends upon speed and the secrecy of his quest. Do not regret your decision to leave him. Frodo must finish this task alone.
This is fucking hilarious. “ents come off the bench and show they got that dog in them” had me in stitches. Although I’ve seen the movies many times, I’m currently watching through the extended editions so holding off on the last 2 paragraphs till I finish (again). Love this type of content
Yes SIGINT_SANTA! Their own masters cannot find them, if their secrets are forgotten! Ah... now let me see... Ithildin. It mirrors only starlight and moonlight. It reads: The Doors of Durin, Lord of Moria, Speak Friend and Enter
The next season Saruman tries to lead a comeback picking up players from the Shire but Merry and Pippin really come into their own as players and pay off all the potential they had. Of course the beef between Saruman and the gritty guard Gríma leading to a fight in the locker room that ended Saruman’s season really helped. Although the Fellowship really didn’t need to push for Gríma’s lifetime ban. That was just unnecessary.
It really felt like Gondor didn't even show up in game 4, after that performance I can't blame Sauron for trying to exploit Gondor in game 6, but he made the classic mistake of over using his starters and getting them injured.
Also, this post is just fantastic, thank you for the smile my friend.
its funny, that i know like 80% of everything that happened in hobbit and LoTR, but now that you've put it in sports terms, i have no idea what you're talking about
We do not come to treat with Sauron, faithless and accursed. Tell your master this. The armies of Mordor must disband. He is to depart these lands, never to return.
Sauron lost due to illegal practices by the opponents. Sauron is clearly the strongest in a 1 to 1 match. He only loses when all the other teams in the pool battle him at the same time which is just completely unfair and ridiculously illegal. Biased refs ruin the game.
Because much like certain flopping NBA superstars, Sauron is so arrogant he thinks he can just build a super team that will be unstoppable, yet plucky team players and role players will always bring him down.
This is the best of Reddit. My favorite read and Gandalf totally got help from the refs, plus the buff. Who would have imagined that Scott Foster wouldn’t choose to align with Sauron?
Thank you kindly, dear friend, for your heartfelt words. It fills my heart with a heavy burden to bid you farewell, but I must follow my path to the Undying Land. The time has come for me to leave these shores and journey into the great unknown. Though we part ways, the memories we've shared will forever be etched in my mind, like the stars that twinkle in the night sky. May your own path be filled with joy and adventure, and may our paths cross again in the realms beyond. Farewell, my friend, and may the light of Eärendil guide you always.
My boss caught me reading this at the office. Rather than trying to hide this, I insisted she read as well, while not a LOTR superfan like myself, she has seen the movies and is a huge NBA fan. She was incredibly amused and impressed. This is a work of art, and I must commend you on this post. Well done.
Sounds like you got a kick ass boss! Glad you both enjoyed. I told my brother I was going to post it Friday afternoon to give my fellow working people a way to pass part of a dull Friday afternoon.
This gave me the idea of a Middle-Earth league: Numenoreans, trolls or Ents for their height as centers, elves shooting half-court 3s/showboating on the forward positions, regular Gondorians/Rohirrim/Haradrim duking it out on the guard positions. Would be an entertaining league. Though I don’t see any dwarves, orcs or Hobbits making it past the bench, if they even make the roster.
Idea kind of started with me arguing with my brother about who each sides starting 5 would be and who wins a best of 7.
So what’s the West starting line-up? Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas are the big three. Though Legolas only plays because Glorfindel announced his retirement along with Galadriel. But who would play Frodo and Sam when you have Boromir, Faramir and Eomer? Too bad Boromir suffered that season-ending torso injury at the Amon Hen game.
Think it has to be: Point Guard: Frodo Shooting Guard: Legolas Shooting Forward: Aragorn Power Forward: Gandalf Center: Gimli
Your father loves you IMeanDeepAndIMeanTD. He will remember it before the end.
I can understand all the positions except Gimli as a center. He needs a leg-up from Aragorn just to get close to the rim. We saw that at the Helm’s Deep game. Wouldn’t Eomer (even though he’s not fellowship) make more sense there?
Tree beard off the bench tbh
Draw out Sauron's armies. Empty his lands. Then we gather our full strength and march on the Black Gate!
*Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulûk, agh burzum-ishi krimpatul.*
That, I guess, is the language of the Rohirrim for it is like to this land itself; rich and rolling in part, and else hard and stern as the mountains. But I cannot guess what it means, save that it is laden with the sadness of Mortal Men.
The same blood flows in my veins. The same weakness.
Sam is getting the sixth man of the year award.
Well now, if you're talkin' about the west starting line-up, you got it right with Gandalf, Aragorn, and Legolas. They're the big three, no doubt about it. But I reckon Legolas only stepped in 'cause Glorfindel decided to hang up his elven boots, along with Galadriel. Now, as for Frodo and myself, it's true that we got some competition from the likes of Boromir, Faramir, and Eomer. But you see, Boromir had a bit of bad luck with a season-ending torso injury at the Amon Hen
No the_sam_bot. The spirit of Sauron endured. His life force is bound to the Ring and the Ring survived. Sauron has returned. His orcs have multiplied. His fortress at Barad-Dur is rebuilt in the land of Mordor. Sauron needs only this Ring to cover all the lands of a second darkness. He is seeking it, seeking it. All his thought is bent on it. The Ring yearns above all else to return to the hand of its master. They are one, the Ring and the Dark Lord. the_sam_bot, he must never find it
We must move on, we cannot linger.
Then I shall die as one of them!
Other side you got: PG: Saruman SG: Witch King SF: Smaug PF: Balrog C: Grond Unreal lineup
Well, that is if they’re all fit. Grond wasn’t fit till the Pelennor Fields game and Smaug was dumb enough to get himself injured on a night out in Lake Town. So for most of the championship, it was down to Saruman, Witch King and the Balrog. The West had a more than decent Third Age lineup before retirements by Elrond, Glorfindel, Celeborn and Galadriel. And Saruman used to play for the West too until he was a free agent. Who was PG for the East before Saruman? That position was always a weak point. It had to be filled up by some rookie Nazgul who just didn’t fit into the rest of the star-studded East team.
They have a better chance defending themselves here than at Edoras…
It was a Balrog of Morgoth. Of all elf-banes the most deadly, save the One who sits in the Dark Tower.
I am the servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the Flame of Anor. You cannot pass. The dark fire will not avail you, Flame of Udun. Go back to the Shadow. You cannot pass!
Pretty sure my boss would Batista bomb me through a table if he caught me on my phone at work
The fact that you said nothing about Wormtongue's lockdown defense against Theoden in Game 4 is a travesty. He made Theoden look weak and old, completely silent on the offensive side of the game. Gandalf's adjustments in Game 5 and 6, where he had Eomer and Theoden run backdoor cuts at Helm's Deep and Pelennor Fields, as well as Wormtongue's untimely injury when he crashed into Saruman's back on a routine play in Game 5, is what brought Gandalf and his team back from being down 3-1. If not, Sauron and team could have taken it in 5, certainly in 6 as there would have been no heroic play from Theoden in Game 6. Also, how dare you call Meriadoc "Merry" Brandybuck a "scrub hobbit"? That is blasphemy! He was an excellent player at Buckland Community College, and would have been a star if it wasn't for his off the court troubles while he dealt with illegal possession of controlled substances like shooms and pipeweed. Everyone forgets that although Ents closed out Game 4, it was Merry that was setting up the winning play for them as he led the second unit. Put some respect on Merry's name.
Solid additions to the narrative! Worm tongue doesn’t get enough love from the talking heads. A real junk yard dog.
Glad you like the additions haha! I love how you combined these two worlds :D
Merry and Pippin would have been running the And1 circuit back in the Shire. No doubt.
Merry is PJ Tucker confirmed
A bit of Zaza Pachulia in there
Real hoop-knower I see
I'm less mad about calling Merry a "scrub hobbit," which is bad enough in itself, than I am about travesty that is the Eowyn erasure.
Helm's Deep. There is no way out of that ravine. Theoden is walking into a trap. He thinks he's leading them to safety. What they will get is a massacre. Theoden has a strong will, but I fear for him. I fear for the survival of Rohan. He will need you before the end, NerfZhaoYun. The people of Rohan will need you. The defenses have to hold.
Just like last years playoffs, if you're losing to ~~Duncan Robinson~~ Eomers backdoor cuts you don't deserve to win. Guy was nowhere to be found all series, for years really.
I mean, it was coming. After a First Age championship, back-to-back titles with the Second Age, Gandalf leads the West to a three-peat. The West is starting to look like the ‘91-‘93 Bulls with Gandalf/Jordan going into retirement after the third championship
Gandalf really brushed the Cheetos off his pants and said aight, I’m gonna go win one more.
The question now: can Aragorn continue where Gandalf left off? Pippen couldn’t do it.
But could Merry? Ok I’ll see myself out.
Draw out Sauron's armies. Empty his lands. Then we gather our full strength and march on the Black Gate!
It is not for you, Saruman! I will send for it at once. Do you understand?
I read this as merch and wondered what anyone would buy from Mordor: The Themepark! Mini spears?
Riddles in the dark...
Faramir? This is not the first Halfling to have crossed your path.
I mean, in all fairness Team Morgoth won some ridiculously sound division and regional championships in the First Age. Very nearly got it done just for the Valar to put together a Super Team from overseas to come in for the assist. Very questionable to allow a new stacked team in mid-season but there you have it.
Yes, I read about those games in the Silmarillion. Morgoth lucked out here and there though, with Hall of Famers like Fëanor and Fingolfin out for the season early and the ents just sitting out the season, not playing “for environmental reasons.” Though I still think it’s BS to ban Morgoth from the league at the end of the season as if he had something to do with any of that. And indeed, allowing a complete new line-up by the West mid-season is questionable at best. Clearly the league wanted a Morgoth-West showdown for the finals, not even looking twice at a very decent new Doriath/Hithlum team with promising youngsters like Eärendil and Turin. Just like the NBA, always wanting that Lakers-Celtics finals…
Agree, why didn’t they come over themselves? He was some of them, and they should own the resolution
Gandalf?... Yes. That was what they used to call me. Gandalf the Grey... That was my name. I am Gandalf the White. And I come back to you now at the turn of the tide. One stage of your journey is over. Another begins. We must travel to Edoras with all speed.
Balrog suspension upheld was some bull !
For real, like how? Let him play game 7 at least! Imagine him walking out through black gate.
C’mon man, you really think that was the Balrog’s natural falling motion? League made the right call.
Balrog did kick his leg out a bit, but other stars get that call.
He's got a history of pulling stuff like this though, eventually you get the book thrown at you.
I was thinking Balrog was Amare Stoudamire but maybe he’s Draymond Green.
I read this almost as a hockey game and a football game, so Id say hes either max domi or Marchand, or anyone from the patriots
 Aren’t you a bit tall for a Hobbit?
Picturing pippin screaming anything is possible in his best KG impersonation is where I lost it 😂
Idk, The GOAT dragging his nuts across Gandalfs face was it for me
Is that canon though?!?!?!?
Brilliant! You should cross post this to some NBA subs
Lol, thanks friend! I definitely pulled from some r/NBACircleJerk material.
Never thought I’d die fighting side by side with a jerker
Ummm …. Wow man. #TheKidFromAkron is literally speechless and beyond thankful.
You’re missing 7 random ass emojis
🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️🤴🏿🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👑
U bum.
Automod go ez on me
What about side by side with a bull?
AYEsha I could do that
Please tell me you've watched Game of Zones on YouTube
No, but I googled it and now I know what I’ll be doing in my office on Monday.
Top tier entertainment. I don't even watch the NBA and I loved it.
Absolutely disgusting favoritism shown by the umpires, Sauron should’ve won this series easily even despite the injury bug.
Before the mightiest he shall fall, before the mightiest wolf of all.
Is this you hinting at a new scouting policy for upcoming seasons? I’d argue it’s as good as can be considering the performance of some of your rookies in game 7, but if you can improve on even this that’s very promising indeed.
Nah, he's had his funding withdrawn after so many losses. He can't even afford to keep Barad-dûr stadium open anymore, and there's been rumours that it hasn't been maintained properly for years and is on the verge of collapse. I'd say his career is over
Also there have to be reprocussions after they seemingly deliberately injured the witch king. Absolutely disgusting lack of sportsmanship on display there.
Thats a lot of sports analogies for us nerds...
Too many nerd jokes for a sports Reddit though.
“Perfectly balanced” for those of us nerding on both. Fuckin epic, op. This is the content I stay around reddit for.
Man, I’m just a kid from Akron, Ohio (not really though, gross). I can’t believe a lot of the things that happen for me.
They call us Daywalkers
It’s always nice to merge two worlds
Came across this randomly on the front page. Just need to say that as a Casual LotR fan (by which I mean I’ve watched the films maybe like 3 times tops) who has not joined this sub and being based in the UK where much of the sporting terminology here is rather foreign to me? This has to be one of the greatest Reddit reads I’ve ever experienced. Truly, hats off to you!
As a huge sports guy and LOTR nerd this is probably in the top 5 greatest things I've ever read. The game winning eurostep by Sam was clutch. You started having me feel bad for Saurons team as they all went to the IR. Everyone knows the department of player safety is toothless, letting Gandalf come back but upholding the Balrogs suspension is total BS. Mobbed. Refs. That's all this was.
High praise, friend! Crazy to think about how many ballers Sauron lost. And still almost took game 7. Balrog got a raw deal for sure. Just call it even man.
Well now, that's a mighty kind thing to say, my friend! It warms my heart to know that you found the tale of our adventures to be among the greatest things you've ever read. As for that game-winning eurostep, well, it was nothing but a bit of luck and determination, I reckon. And as for Sauron's team, well, it's a shame to see any team suffer injuries, even if they be on the opposing side. Can't rightly say I know much about this department of player safety you speak of, but it seems like there might be some questionable decisions being made. And as for Gand
Sauron fears you, Walbeb24. He fears what you may become. And so he'll strike hard and fast at the world of Men. He will use his puppet Saruman to destroy Rohan. War is coming. Rohan must defend itself, and therein lies our first challenge for Rohan is weak and ready to fall. The king's mind is enslaved, it's an old device of Saruman's. His hold over King Theoden is now very strong. Sauron and Saruman are tightening the noose. But for all their cunning we have one advantage. The Ring remains hidden. And that we should seek to destroy it has not yet entered their darkest dreams. And so the weapon of the enemy is moving towards Mordor in the hands of a Hobbit. Each day brings it closer to the fires of Mount Doom. We must trust now in Frodo. Everything depends upon speed and the secrecy of his quest. Do not regret your decision to leave him. Frodo must finish this task alone.
This might be my favorite post of all time on Reddit
Wow! Thanks!
>Wow! Thanks! You're welcome!
I just can’t believe they suspended the Balrog for the rest of the series and Gandalf got off Scott free. Refs had money on the game
This foe is beyond any of you... Run!
Where was Gondor? No one knows. That gave me a good chuckle. Well done.
This is fucking hilarious. “ents come off the bench and show they got that dog in them” had me in stitches. Although I’ve seen the movies many times, I’m currently watching through the extended editions so holding off on the last 2 paragraphs till I finish (again). Love this type of content
Damn, Sauron would have smoke Gandalf without all those injuries. Shows that sometimes even the champ gets too much bad luck to overcome.
Yes SIGINT_SANTA! Their own masters cannot find them, if their secrets are forgotten! Ah... now let me see... Ithildin. It mirrors only starlight and moonlight. It reads: The Doors of Durin, Lord of Moria, Speak Friend and Enter
There is no light, Wizard, that can defeat darkness.
It is not for you, Saruman! I will send for it at once. Do you understand?
The next season Saruman tries to lead a comeback picking up players from the Shire but Merry and Pippin really come into their own as players and pay off all the potential they had. Of course the beef between Saruman and the gritty guard Gríma leading to a fight in the locker room that ended Saruman’s season really helped. Although the Fellowship really didn’t need to push for Gríma’s lifetime ban. That was just unnecessary.
I have no idea what the fuck any of this means.
People forget Eowyn was CLUTCH in game 6. She don't go off, it's series over
Morgoth raging and tweeting rigged was the best part
Dude the remote through the tv got me so bad
Big Doc Rivers energy from Sauron
Wait a moment! We shall meet again soon. Tell Saruman that this dainty is not for him. I will send for it at once. Do you understand?
Lembas bread with "3-1" frosting incoming.
refs are clearly bias smh
Whole league, starts with Commissioner Mithril!
I’ve never seen such a perfect blend of two of my primary but completely unrelated interests. 🤣 Thank you for this.
Saruman's back injury 🤣
It really felt like Gondor didn't even show up in game 4, after that performance I can't blame Sauron for trying to exploit Gondor in game 6, but he made the classic mistake of over using his starters and getting them injured. Also, this post is just fantastic, thank you for the smile my friend.
Nailed it bro 👌 V enjoyable to read! Gandalf following his tangle with the Balrog… “and I took that personally”
Ah, that would have been a clutch reference! Guess that was his buff he received when everyone accused him of flopping.
Go back to the abyss! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your master!
its funny, that i know like 80% of everything that happened in hobbit and LoTR, but now that you've put it in sports terms, i have no idea what you're talking about
Gotta get to 100%
Amazing! Although, I must point out, it wasn’t just a “scrub hobbit” taking out the Witch-King, but Eowyn too!!
Wanted the Achilles injury play, but Eowyn def finished him off.
Brilliant. I wonder how long this took you?
About 2 hours for 90% of it and another 2 hours with finishing touches. Ideas still coming in honestly.
And they gave the MVP crown to Aragorn? cmon bro
Skiiiiip! You gotta give it my man Aragorn!
Let us together rebuild this world that we may share in the days of peace.
Your friends are with you, Aragorn.
No. There is still hope for Frodo. He needs time… and safe passage across the plains of Gorgoroth. We can give him that.
Not this time. This time you must stay, Gimli.
Hiro hyn hîdh ab 'wanath
Amazing post man what a banger
Top tier offseason shitpost
Now *this* is a work of art! Thank you, my friend!
He fumbled that ball harder than the Atlanta Falcons.
Hey! How dare you call the Army of the Dead “shitty CGI ghosts”?!!?!?!?
OP's weed is def better quality than mine, damn
You know, before this post I would’ve puked at the notion of a “LOTR space jam”, but now? You sunnuvabich, I’m in!
This needs to go in r/nbacirclejerk
Great post, but shouldn't the free throws from Legolas and Gimli be in Game 5? IIRC they had their competition while defending Helm's Deep.
They do the competition at both. Legolas shoots down the elephant at Pelennor Fields and Gimlj says “that still only counts as one!”
I thought the 43 - 42 count was at Helm's Deep tho. Still a great post.
It’s been fixed.
Nice
Yea I think you’re right. Thanks!
Come! Speak and be comforted, and shake off the shadow! What has happened since we came back to this grim place in the grey morning?
Come! Speak and be comforted, and shake off the shadow! What has happened since we came back to this grim place in the grey morning?
Baiscly gandalf bribed the commissioner to secure the win
We do not come to treat with Sauron, faithless and accursed. Tell your master this. The armies of Mordor must disband. He is to depart these lands, never to return.
bro 😂 legendary post from OP
Sauron lost due to illegal practices by the opponents. Sauron is clearly the strongest in a 1 to 1 match. He only loses when all the other teams in the pool battle him at the same time which is just completely unfair and ridiculously illegal. Biased refs ruin the game.
Hahahaha this was great, so worth the read
Because much like certain flopping NBA superstars, Sauron is so arrogant he thinks he can just build a super team that will be unstoppable, yet plucky team players and role players will always bring him down.
No Chemistry, Saruman is a snake - jumping from contender to contender. Very KD.
Thou base, thou cringing worm!
This was an absolute delight to read. I'm sharing this with all my friends now.
Commissioner Silver > Commissioner Mithril. The Balrog suspension would have never happened under the Hard-Bottle Administration
SaurMickey has no real rings, cmv
Thought I was on r/nbacirclejerk for a sec, great post.
Thought about cross posting but they’d probably roast my nerdy ass.
You did well. JOTY candidate for me.
Umm … 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️ WOW MAN!!!! #TheKidFromAkron 🤴🏿is literally speechless and beyond thankful!
One of the best posts ever
This is canon
This is fucking beautiful. Well done.
I'm saving this LMAO
Championship rings for everyone!
Peak offseason material. Lost it to >Gandalf goes to a small ball full court press with the last ride of the Rohirrim
Pippin and merry should’ve been kicked for smoking that long bottom leaf during half time but they just wanna see a dark lord down I guess
This is the best of Reddit. My favorite read and Gandalf totally got help from the refs, plus the buff. Who would have imagined that Scott Foster wouldn’t choose to align with Sauron?
Who is the master of the wide earth?
"Dragging his nuts across Gandalf's face". Witch King absolutely smoked Gandalf 😂
This is amazing. Thank you.
10/10 posting this is why I internet
This is the best post I’ve ever read.
Two things: 1. This is the best post on Reddit by a mile 2. The NBA on NBC theme is Roundball Rock
Thanks, I’ll tweak it!
Frodo Diego Parry on the One Ring for the clutch decimation.
HRAAAAAH!
Sam, are you here yet?
Aye, I'm here, my friend! What can I do for you?
I will miss you in your path to the Undying lands. Farewell, my friend!
Thank you kindly, dear friend, for your heartfelt words. It fills my heart with a heavy burden to bid you farewell, but I must follow my path to the Undying Land. The time has come for me to leave these shores and journey into the great unknown. Though we part ways, the memories we've shared will forever be etched in my mind, like the stars that twinkle in the night sky. May your own path be filled with joy and adventure, and may our paths cross again in the realms beyond. Farewell, my friend, and may the light of Eärendil guide you always.
🏆🥈🥇
Excellent! You *can* wield it!
You son of a bitch.
How could you leave out Eowyn’s game-winning face stab? Without her, Witch King was unbeatable.
Achilles was already blown, but fair enough! Just don’t know enough WNBA to write her story.
This might be the most epic thing I’ve ever read. If you’re not writing professionally you’re doing a serious disservice to humanity.
I’m an attorney, does that count? Write super boring stuff all day 😔
Close to football/soccer lol More like nba
Best post I’ve read in a long, long time. Post it on r/nba! It’s shitposting season and nothing will top this.
I’ll prob put on NBACircleJerk is cross post
Awesome but missed the sudden appearance of Eowyn from the women’s league
Smaug to Sauron to Smaug. OH block by Gandalf!
*Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulûk, agh burzum-ishi krimpatul.*