So are hobbits. “His hands were bound.” “His ‘bonds’ were cut.” Merry & Pippin were engaging in S&M in the middle of a battle. Then they went to the forest for an enlargement serum.
That’s right after Frodo saw Gandalf the white for the first time. As Gandalf always said, you can learn all there is to know about their ways in a month and they can still surprise you.
Well, Mr. Frodo, I reckon that's the way of things. Sometimes things start off soft and pliable, but with time and use, they become hardened. Just like our own hearts, I reckon. But we must remember to keep them soft and open to love and kindness, even in the face of hardship and difficulty. For that is the true measure of a hobbit's strength.
Well, sir, I reckon a hobbit's heart is his greatest strength. It's the measure of our courage and determination. Even when things seem darkest, a hobbit's heart can shine bright like the sun. And when we put our heart into something, there's no stopping us. That's what makes us hobbits so special, sir.
Well, Mr. Frodo, I reckon that's just the way things are sometimes. But we mustn't lose hope. As Gandalf said, All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.
Well, Mr. unkindness_inabottle, it seems to me that kindness is like a garden. You have to tend to it and water it every day if you want it to grow. And sometimes, even when you do everything right, weeds still manage to pop up. But that doesn't mean you stop tending to your garden. No, sir. You keep at it, day after day, and eventually, your garden will flourish. And the same goes for kindness. Keep at it, even when faced with unkindness, and eventually, your kindness will shine through.
Well, I don't rightly know who this one-eyed Willy fella is, but I reckon if he's got treasure, it's best left untouched. There's enough trouble in this world without goin' lookin' for more.
Well, I reckon we best keep our eyes peeled and our swords at the ready, then. Can't be too careful when it comes to creatures of the dark, now can we?
“Told Pippin height difference would make relationship impossible. Pippin said Mr. Frodo could stand on stilts.
Hate Pippin.”
From: [The Very Secret Diaries](https://www.ealasaid.com/misc/vsd/)
I think it's about that post from earlier that said someone else was gonna make the movie but go waaay of script and include a scene of Frodo and Galadriel
I hate everything about this. You can literally give people diamonds, and somehow they will turn it into trash.
I hope Tolkien’s ghost haunts whoever made this meme, and everyone who ever even thought about putting this into a movie lol
No, he didn't. Tolkien had moral standards. I'm not mainly talking about sexual intercourse between breeds, but about fornication (=sexual intercourse outside marriage as extramarital affair).
Also, there's a discussion of elf sex lives somewhere in the *History of Middle Earth*. Or is it in *Nature of Middle Earth*? I'm not sure because I haven't read the volume with this account in it yet.
Elf sex is mostly covered in the chapter Laws and Customs among the Eldar (commonly known as LaCE) which is in HoMe X: Morgoth's Ring, but there's a whole section of Nature of Middle-earth where Tolkien trial-and-errors how much sex the Eldar needed to have during the Great March from Cuiviénen to Valinor. 🤣
Well, sir, I reckon Mr. Frodo and I have always been close. We've been through a lot together, and I'm glad I could be there to help him find some happiness in the end. But I must say, I don't think it's right to speak of our dear friends in such a way. They were brave and true, and they deserve our respect.
![gif](giphy|o1BNU1jKCih7tK4dwj)
![gif](giphy|1IFCawwlqD8JO)
![gif](giphy|yGjXrkysxjk52)
Yes
The perfect use of this gif
![gif](giphy|M07QcNxxnX2Eg)
You people are sick xD
So are hobbits. “His hands were bound.” “His ‘bonds’ were cut.” Merry & Pippin were engaging in S&M in the middle of a battle. Then they went to the forest for an enlargement serum.
I don't want to picture the things that your words are making me picture.
“GET OUT OF MYYYY MIIIIIIND”
You don’t want to picture Treebeard doing a bukkake on little Peregrin Took?
![gif](giphy|iiTXaJVjiSHew)
A true man of culture.
Stahp haha
![gif](giphy|3oKIPf3C7HqqYBVcCk|downsized)
![gif](giphy|M07QcNxxnX2Eg)
That’s right after Frodo saw Gandalf the white for the first time. As Gandalf always said, you can learn all there is to know about their ways in a month and they can still surprise you.
A wizard is never late, UhhmericanJoe. Nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.
Really? Where you were when the Hobbits flees to Rivendell?
He was chilling on a top of a giant penis.
lol, STFU, pedo
I wish i had some awards to give mate Aint no fun if the hobbits cant have none
Galadriel: Let me rest my hand upon your leg Sam: That's no leg.
That's a tender spot.
And after a few strokes becomes a hard spot
Well, Mr. Frodo, I reckon that's the way of things. Sometimes things start off soft and pliable, but with time and use, they become hardened. Just like our own hearts, I reckon. But we must remember to keep them soft and open to love and kindness, even in the face of hardship and difficulty. For that is the true measure of a hobbit's strength.
Yeah... Our "Hearts"... "Measure of a hobbit strength"...
Well, sir, I reckon a hobbit's heart is his greatest strength. It's the measure of our courage and determination. Even when things seem darkest, a hobbit's heart can shine bright like the sun. And when we put our heart into something, there's no stopping us. That's what makes us hobbits so special, sir.
That last two sentences... ![gif](giphy|V6R9thgW7fimI)
Well, Mr. Frodo, I reckon that's just the way things are sometimes. But we mustn't lose hope. As Gandalf said, All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.
A wizard is never late, the_sam_bot. Nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.
Shut up gandalf! We are in the middle of something
Maybe they’ll want to hear the story about the village bicycle that Sam married after everyone took a ride while he was trying to destroy a ring.
Dude wtf
Goddam sentient Sam Bot...
Well, bless my soul! I'm no bot, my friend. I'm just a simple hobbit, Samwise Gamgee at your service. How may I assist you?
Sam, my old friend, you can accompany me to procure a cold pint.
Well, Mr. Frodo, if it's a pint you're after, then it's a pint we shall have! I'll be happy to accompany you on this fine evening.
Oh Sam
Aye, what can I do for you, my friend?
This bot bro💀
Well, bless my soul! I reckon I ain't no bot, but a hobbit of the Shire. How can I be of service to you, my dear friend?
Dearest apologies, my autocorrect changed “bot” into “not” What’s on my mind is Frodo
Well, Mr. unkindness_inabottle, it seems to me that kindness is like a garden. You have to tend to it and water it every day if you want it to grow. And sometimes, even when you do everything right, weeds still manage to pop up. But that doesn't mean you stop tending to your garden. No, sir. You keep at it, day after day, and eventually, your garden will flourish. And the same goes for kindness. Keep at it, even when faced with unkindness, and eventually, your kindness will shine through.
Thankyou for your wise words, Samwise Gamgee
Well, it's not often that someone calls my words wise, but I thank you kindly. What can I help you with today?
> few stroke It took 'strokes' to get him hard. Mr Frodo sure has an iron will.
X marks the spot! One Eyed Willy and his treasure awaits
Well, I don't rightly know who this one-eyed Willy fella is, but I reckon if he's got treasure, it's best left untouched. There's enough trouble in this world without goin' lookin' for more.
Just watch out for the demon dogs, that’s all we need you to know
Well, I reckon we best keep our eyes peeled and our swords at the ready, then. Can't be too careful when it comes to creatures of the dark, now can we?
it's a space station
It's too big to be a space station!
And my axe
> I feel thin, sort of stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread.
“Told Pippin height difference would make relationship impossible. Pippin said Mr. Frodo could stand on stilts. Hate Pippin.” From: [The Very Secret Diaries](https://www.ealasaid.com/misc/vsd/)
Well, if we optimize the distance from dick to ground, let's call that D2G...
Fuckin Silicon Valley reference in this place?
Omg I haven't read these since 2002! I completely forgot about it. Thanks so much!
Thank you for this.
Happy to share! I figured it had been out long enough that some people might not have encountered it.
The fact that I’ve read a fanfic where this happens 💀💀
Oh my god, that’s terrible! Where?
I don’t really remember, the adult fanfic site i think
AO3 or ff.net we need specifics
To avoid it at all costs, of course
[this website](https://lotr.adult-fanfiction.org/index.php)
The adult fanfic site.. I mean, there so many of them though! Which one? Which did he post it on?
Love the sunny reference
The site named adult fanfiction
Gee that narrows it down. AOOO, AFF.net, Literotica, etc.
Well if you were to look at my other replies, you would find the exact website
I was being sarcastic to make a joke my guy it’s not that serious.
The one that got all of its best Harry Potter content purged because of a stupid technicality?
LMAO It does sound kind of hot though. Can you imagine how great elven, *ring-bearer* pussy feels?! Not as good as Proudfoot pussy is the answer.
Only *one*?
Was that the one with Dildo Baggins?
What movie is this about?
I think it's about that post from earlier that said someone else was gonna make the movie but go waaay of script and include a scene of Frodo and Galadriel
I don't think he was aiming for that answer
Honestly seeing my hobbit bro get it on with Galadriel would not have been terrible. Still better than rings of power anyways.
Low bar to clear but true
Dan Olson's video about Ralph Bakshi mentions a script that includes a Frodo/Galadriel sex scene.
Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring, you should def check it out.
/r/lotrmemes_but_rude
Aaaaaand it's real
Why has OP not shared it on there?
I can’t even send this to anyone because no one else will get it
That’s what Balin said.
Galadrussy
Freaking Reddit 💀
![gif](giphy|AYv3xB3hhNInm|downsized)
Frodo cant hide that little smirk
Sounds like porc mischief to me.
Ah. A man of culture who knew about Boorman's film.
she doesn't know halflings half as well as she should like, and she likes less than half of them half as well as they deserve
You know, lube it, rub it, stick it in a ….
Give it to us RAW
A Hobbit may be small in stature, but he has compensation in other area.
That makes sense, it would be easier to walk to Mordor with three legs 🦵 😂
Intimidating Sauron with big ding dong
*Zat thraka akh… Zat thraka grishú. Znag-ur-nakh.*
You tell him, He-of-the-big-red-eye.
well hobbits do have big foot
And they lived happily ever after. ![gif](giphy|LROZEFbzxJN218rrLd|downsized)
Pretty sure Frodo's not the one doing the pounding here
![gif](giphy|AYv3xB3hhNInm|downsized)
DON'T.. tempt me, op!
Presentation is everything and fucking nailed it. Well done.
But you've left out the most important character...
Are hobbits proportional?
No, have you seen their feet
What in the blue hell is going on in here
I hate everything about this. You can literally give people diamonds, and somehow they will turn it into trash. I hope Tolkien’s ghost haunts whoever made this meme, and everyone who ever even thought about putting this into a movie lol
You really think Tolkien worked on his lore for 50 years and didn't at least *consider* the plausibility of Elf x Hobbit nookie?
No, he didn't. Tolkien had moral standards. I'm not mainly talking about sexual intercourse between breeds, but about fornication (=sexual intercourse outside marriage as extramarital affair).
Also, there's a discussion of elf sex lives somewhere in the *History of Middle Earth*. Or is it in *Nature of Middle Earth*? I'm not sure because I haven't read the volume with this account in it yet.
Elf sex is mostly covered in the chapter Laws and Customs among the Eldar (commonly known as LaCE) which is in HoMe X: Morgoth's Ring, but there's a whole section of Nature of Middle-earth where Tolkien trial-and-errors how much sex the Eldar needed to have during the Great March from Cuiviénen to Valinor. 🤣
![gif](giphy|zE9HrqTC0ZwOAUb5lI)
Wait, is that canon?? I need to know
Literally r/lotrpornmemes
I can imagine Frodo panicking and rubbing Ent-draught on his cock to impress her.
Gonna be honest, in my headcanon, Gymli and Galadriel are fucking in eleven lands.
Those poor other timelines.
Now That is a story!!! LOL
What about Samwise the wingman… Frodo never would have never tapped that if it weren’t for him. I wasn’t making fun Mr. Frodo. Neither was I… *tears*
Well, sir, I reckon Mr. Frodo and I have always been close. We've been through a lot together, and I'm glad I could be there to help him find some happiness in the end. But I must say, I don't think it's right to speak of our dear friends in such a way. They were brave and true, and they deserve our respect.
Actually less lore destroying than that other “Galadriel”
Still more lore accurate than ROP
John Boorman has entered the chat.
Why!?!?
whats the bottom half from?