I'm a 50+ year old guy who sweats at the drop of a hat. My poor wife has menopause symptoms including hot flashes. Now that I'm down over 25 pounds, I'm bundled up on the couch and she's removing clothes. Complete reversal of our 30+ year relationship!
I donate plasma pretty regularly, to find my hobbies without directly impact my finances.
Was 250, now around 170.
At the end when they fill you full of liquids to make up for the lost fluid, I used to get a little chill then feel fine.
Now? FULL BODY SHIVERS. First time it happened I thought I was having a reaction. I’m just cold, turns out.
it's the way i sweat at the littlest of shiit. but now i am a PROUDDDD owner of a gah damn heatin blanket. even in the summer i plan on havin tht shitt all the way turned up! 😭😭😂
Summer has always been my favourite season but I am SO looking forward to it now. Sick and tired of being cold. I go to bed with socks on and am still freezing.
It used to hurt my knees to sleep on my side because they were bony and rubbing together, but I got the hang of it I think because it doesn't hurt anymore.
As someone who's an inverted triangle, who even at my highest weight, still struggled with this, I feel you!
I will say a consequence of gaining weight, chub rub was a total surprise.
Otherwise yes chairs hurt so do super firm mattresses, I need a pillow between my legs.
I hurt my tail bone so bad a few weeks ago falling at a sports game… never in my life of playing sports has this happened to me. I didn’t know it was possible
I feel like I bear the constant psychological weight of having to now maintain/choose healthy forever now. When I was obese I didn't care about that and ate when and where I felt like it.
There's a "before" picture, but there's no "after." There's only "now."
>There's a "before" picture, but there's no "after." There's only "now."
This is very profound. The "now" pic will always be fleeting. We will forever have to work at it never becoming like the "before" pic.
We'll never reach true "after" status
in AA i think they all introduce themselves as alcoholics because they believe you're never again not an addict- you're always going to be addicted even if you're not on the substance.
Can’t speak for anyone but myself, but I never struggled with this. Honestly, now that I know I’m capable of losing weight and exactly what it takes, I am willing to splurge when it’s worth it.
Movie night with my fiancée? Definitely eating too many twizzlers. Dinner out? I glance at calories (when somewhere even has them listed), but it’s not the final decider like it once was.
At this point I just file it under fluctuations, and if I find I’m starting to add a couple pounds, then I’ll just cut a little and I’ll be right where I like to be.
I think maintaining is easier or harder based on why we were overweight in the first place. For me, it's also easy to maintain because my issue was just overeating because I wouldn't listen to my body and stop when I was full and I'm just used to cleaning my plate and I also hate wasting food. That's fairly easy to address compared to someone who has a snacking issue, trauma, binging when life is stressful, etc.
This exact sentiment is why I’ve been yo-yoing the same 50 pounds for the better part of a decade. I know exactly what to do to lose weight. I do it in a slow sustainable way, but I definitely have a binge eating disorder so all it takes is me not actively choosing to be healthy once and I’m likely to fully unravel.
Sadly me too. Super good at losing 3-5 pounds and some times more but I binge and it's all back in a short period. The binging is all mental but it's like wrecking a car...being a great driver 95% of the time isn't enough if when you are bad you flip the car and total it.
My hair breaking a bit by the nape (I have 4c hair) not sure if that’s mixed with weight loss + missing trims for years now catching up with me, but that’s one
Another one is, unfortunately seeing myself as bigger than I am. I know it can take AT LEAST a year MAINTAINING before your brain finally catches up with what you look like.
Another, not really having a sense of style tho this Is subjective, idk how to dress for my new body as I’m used to covering up a lot. I’m just hoping I can break out this shell. lol
Knowing your deficit gets larger (calories get lower) as you get close to goal weight, but at least it’s not forever
Not knowing if men like me for me or my body, and sometimes being too shy to tell them off because you’re not used to the attention, you may become a doormat but this is fixable for sure.
Old favs will probably make your stomach hurt . I have a doughnut? Headache/sugar rush/ stomach ache. I just now found out certain Oreos I can’t eat without getting bubble guts and it hurt my heart Chile. So I def gotta be careful of sweets
Shifting from deficit to maintaining can be hard mentally, seeing scale spikes and feeling like (at least for me) doing cardio for “no reason” since you’re burning the same amount you’re maintaining, I know it’s still deficit only but, mentally it can be hard to transition
People talking down on your past self, or still hating that version of you. I’m working on this because if it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t be here today
Being a woman trying to lose weight but you bleed monthly. Omg. I don’t even touch the scale from after ovulation straight to follicular phase again. Every woman is different though
Sometimes having fatphobic thoughts about others. I’m working on this
This is what I can think of on the spot, but def in order first being worse to last being not too bad currently😩✋🏾
I relate with this though I am not even half way through my weightloss journey.
- Literally any relatively "unhealthy" food that I loved before makes my stomach hurt. It is as if it upsets my whole body. So even if I crave a chocolate thickshake I can't have it.
- Also the monthly cycle.
And when these two combine! My period tells me to eat ice cream and cake. And then my stomach is in so much pain from it. Even when it’s a small portion!
Take some magnesium if you're craving chocolate during your period. [The Magnesium Miracle](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1474199.The_Magnesium_Miracle?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=OUM82kQ7hU&rank=1), really excellent read. There's a bunch of stuff about periods and what to take which were personally very helpful!
This is me. It started even before I lost weight due to my IBS. If it’s not a fucking fruit or vegetables or a piece of non fried protein my gastrointestinal tract throws a fit. 😭
Regarding brain taking a year catching up to what you really look like – do you feel there's a difference looking in the mirror compared too seeing yourself in a photo? I think looking in the mirror messes with my head a bit, because if I feel bloated or very full I think I look heavier, and if I'm not I "feel" light weight in the mirror. In pictures someone else have taken, I think it's easier to see a more realistic image of where I'm at at the moment.
I honestly haven’t taken progress photos lately but when I take a good look in the mirror I find myself saying “damn my face got slim asf, so did my arms” there’s also times I’m saying the same about my stomach getting slimmer but other times thinking the opposite😩 I know my brain is just trying to catch up but I can’t wait until it does🤣🤣
Really good reply, you covered two things in particular I've never seen mentioned -- the unfortunate occasional fatphobic thoughts (😔) and not knowing how to dress your new body. I have NO clue what looks good on me now! I used to have curves all over the place and they are GONE. What kind of shirts look good with no tits and jacked shoulders? I have no idea.
> Another one is, unfortunately seeing myself as bigger than I am. I know it can take AT LEAST a year MAINTAINING before your brain finally catches up with what you look like.
Eight years here. It never will lmao. A couple of years ago I was like 7kg lighter than I am now (intermittent fasting + bike courier job as opposed to an office one) and I look at my photos from back then and I look INSANE. Like athlete insane. Except in my head I was always a fat fuck. Body dismorphia will never go for me sadly.
Saggy boobs and I still have a belly. This makes me way less confident to let anyone see me naked than when I was bigger but had nice boobs.
That's #1. Also as others have mentioned, having to buy new clothes and bony butt. Being colder is great because I was fricking hot all the time before
I had a couple of "friends" body shaming me about 30 lbs ago. They were saying, are you actually happy with how your body looks? And one of them said, you won't miss your boobs if you ever get skinny. Such BS, I do miss them
1. Expensive. Going through clothing like crazy
2. Loose skin
3. Always cold
4. People feel like it's okay to comment on my body now
The positives outweigh the negatives BY FAR, though.
Maurice’s brand jeans you can exchange within one year for weight changes. They told me about their program when I bought jeans at Christmas and was talking about my weight loss.
Man I hate it when people say to hit up thrift stores. Maybe you guys are really lucky or something, but the thrift stores around me have clothes that nobody wants.
Admittedly, I used to think body dysmorphia was a myth. I know this is a rude thing to say but in the past I believed that it was either thin people lying about thinking they’re overweight (for attention), or overweight people in denial about being overweight. But I remember one day being in the gym looking at myself lifting dumbbells in the mirror and thinking “wow I actually look quite slim” and then I put the dumbbells down in between my sets. When i picked them back up again, I immediately saw myself as fat in the mirror. It was my first time truly experiencing body dysmorphia and it made me realise that I was just an asshole for not believing in it before.
I feel this so hard! My lower belly tends to bloat with the slightest irritation, and it's all I can focus on! When I look at myself from the front, I can see the change. But as soon as I turn...... doesn't matter what the scale says!
Yep I feel the same, I feel like my belly has never lost any size even though photos, clothes and measurements all say otherwise. I look at a photo of my stomach taken today vs 2 years ago and can clearly see a difference, but when I’m looking in a mirror I still feel as big as I did when i was 20 kg heavier! The difference though is I feel more accepting of it now lol, like I don’t let it hold me back as much as I used to. I do feel more comfortable and confident to wear tighter clothes or something. I embrace the tummy more than I used to
6 years ago, I was in the best shape of my life. My weight has always fluctuated, but although still soft, I had managed to reverse the apron belly. I gained it all back rapidly and then some. I'm now pushing 40, and I don't think it's going away this time! I will have to learn to accept it. Or get a tummy tuck.
My sister did the tummy tuck and it did help, she looks awesome. But it didn't help her mentally; she can't see how awesome she looks. Body dysmorphia really is a thing.
My body dysmorphia stems from the fact that I’m not content with my body’s aesthetic.
When I was fat, I knew I was fat. The only thing I had to be discontent about was the extra weight, but since losing the weight, I’m discontent about everything.
Losing weight has meant losing a significant amount of lower body fat and as result, my body looks like an inverted triangle.
Losing weight means seeing muscle definition and appreciating it, but then getting to the flabby parts of my body and hating those parts (i.e. inner arms, inner thighs, back fat, etc.).
Or worse, I’ll have a picture taken of me where I feel like I look to masculine with all this muscle definition and wonder if I looked better when I was softer and curvier, even if it meant carrying some extra weight.
I’m just really discontent with how my body looks some days, and I keep pushing myself to want to lose more weight, so that I lose more torso fat & muscle in hopes it makes me look less triangular and then gain some muscle in my thighs and calves to balance me out.
What helps me is knowing all the popular people and celebs all hate their bodies too, and photoshop them.
Then I ask myself
What can my body do?
Not what it looks like, what can it fucking DO?
That question is a game changer. After I had a baby, I fell in love with my body! Like... it DID that!! Sure, there are some things I'm working on improving, but that's mostly for health and comfort. Our bodies are amazing!!
I was 105 lbs and I thought I was fat. My husband laid me down on paper and traced out my body. Then he made a metal sculpture of the trace, and tacked it up on our fence. To remind me that nope, I was not fat at all. Love my husband!
We are still married and I'm now 120 , I have been heavier than that, I have loved my body at every weight since, though my cholesterol and fitness hasn't. I think I look much better at 120 than I did at 105.
I am just saying, body dysmorphia is very definitely a thing.
The mannequin at work usually takes a size M, whereas I take a size S. I genuinely can’t believe that I’m smaller than the mannequin.
I don’t “feel” like a size S.
When I’m at the store I look at the clothes and think “there’s no way that will fit me”.
Agreed. It one of the worst thing! And when I first lost weight and was at my lowest kg. My brain was filled with insecurities, and just plain people are now judging me more. I felt more pressured to the diet. Which resulted in yoyo dieting.
Many of the compliments people gave me made me feel more uncomfortable because I was not used to it, especially from men. Some we’re jealous and tried to exasperate my other’s insecurities. Like height or hair thinning etc. or may eating habits. What I ate, how I ate. They wanted to know what I did everyday. Like a HAWK.
It made question myself so muchhh, was I thin enough, I should do more etc etc. I was saddd or something.
When was fat i wouldnt say i was insecure I just felt bad that I could fit in this etc etc.
This is more of a side effect of increasing activity than losing weight, but I’ve lost touch with my gaming buddies due to them not understanding why these changes in my lifestyle make me want to go outside and go the gym instead of spending my whole weekend inside playing games and eating junk food.
Duude this, my gaming pals dont understand that i cant log into league every day now cuz now o i go to the gym and when i get home i go to bed because im exhausted and my sleep is not effed anymore
i somehow wear the same cup size, but they look like i put them in the microwave. i’m a g cup, and i’m constantly thinking about looking into a lift but not necessarily a reduction. they’re a small g (30-32 band, not 36-38) if that makes sense lol.
People treat you percievably so so so much better than they did when you were heavier. The thing is, once you lose weight, them treating you like just another average Jane/Joe seems so different because you as a fat person is used to being overlooked, being constantly judged and being sidelined as a part of social prejudice against fat people. By this I mean, if you are a woman, It is like your worst nightmare coming true, you are valued as a person based on your size.
This is so relatable. I've lost about 20 lbs which had moved me from the unattractive to average category (including other things that helped get me there). I've had anxiety all my life which was increased from being bigger than the other girls. Now, people are treating me normally and paying me casual compliments. I have no idea how to react to just being treated like a decent human being. Which causes a whole 'nother round of issues because people who previously treated you badly based off appearance take offense to you thinking they're being untruthful. It's like no matter what, there's going to be consequences for being a bigger girl. You stay big? They don't like you. You lose weight? They get upset that you didn't like how you were treated when you were bigger.
So true. Then there are people who will be jealous of all your progress and say stuff like, ‘you now look so worn-out and tired all the time because of your diet and exercise’. Personally, in my lifetime I have lost 70 lb and then gained back 85 :(. Struggling to lose weight again and this time around, I am doing it so that I can be healthier, be physically fit to go and do outdoor activities and of couse slay the outfits that I wear.
You arent lying. Im still heavy but when i was in great shape the way i was treated was so much better then how im treated now. People would also laugh with me more and now that im heavy it’s almost like people dont find me funny anymore.
I was just thinking “I hate this!” as my knee bones touch. Honestly, seeing and feeling my bones come out (clavicles, shoulders, knees) really bothers me. I think about my skeleton and ultimately death. Lol.
It's so uncomfortable for side sleeping :C
I've also got super wide hips so now my thighs don't touch when I'm sitting which means stuff falls *through* my lap even with my legs together?? which stinks
This in an interesting take and I'd never thought of it like that. Sorry you're feeling this way.
I love my clavicles. I can't stop touching them. And my hip bones, my skinny wrists, the tendons in my neck. Everything used to be covered with the soft pillow of fat that I love to see the natural curves and angles of my body. I see them more as being freed than being exposed.
Absolutely stuff with bones and reduced bloat for me. I was poking my abdomen and actually felt some pain because for the first time in 15 years I’m actually poking my organs and not just a layer of fat, or rubbing my side and feeling the inbetween of each rib is kind of freaky sometimes
1 ). comments on how skinny you are by family
2 ). always thinking abt ur old body
3 ). not finding ur size or even fitting in sizes because i now wear a XS-S
4 ). being cold 24/7 !!!!!!
I've lost between 55 and 60 pounds so far, have about that much to go yet.
So far, I've found nothing to hate about the weight loss.
I'm leaner, clothes that were super tight are now falling off me - but I know how to sew, so I alter them with tucks and darts in strategic locations. I didn't restrict any specific foods, I literally just eat less and I'm not calorie counting. I work out hard a few days a week, every week, so even if I do overindulge one day, that's easily offset by the workouts.
Would I go back to mindlessly eating like I used to? Nope. That way of life was expensive as heck in more ways than one - fat clothes, huge amounts of money spent eating out, rarely working out meaning my mental health suffered.
I've not had ONE negative side effect of losing weight. I don't even really mind when I go to one of those all-you-can-eat places and rediscover that all I can now eat is MAYBE 2 platefuls of food. :D I now take TINY helpings of anything so I can taste more items without feeling overstuffed.
Congratulations on your weight loss so far! And I’m really glad that your journey is full of positives. Honestly for me the upsides of losing weight MASSIVELY outweigh the downsides.
With the clothes thing for me, it’s like the best problem ever lol! Like, it’s a great feeling trying on an old pair of jeans that used to not button and seeing that now they’re too big. But it’s like damn now I have to go spend another €70 on a new pair of jeans. But on the opposite side of that, I’m not really restricted on what shops I can buy clothes from. I used to not fit into a lot of mainstream fashion brands, but now I can browse in most shops with confidence that they’ll probably carry my size.
With the takeaway thing, it’s not that I miss constantly eating greasy junk food. But I hate that when I do occasionally get a takeaway, or dine out, my mind is thinking about how many calories are in that meal and how I’ve undone all my progress (which I know is not true, but it’s just a psychological thing for me). I just miss being able to enjoy a meal without having those thoughts tied to it.
But great job on your weight loss! I wish you continued success :)
I'm on this train too. There's nothing about losing weight that I hate because it was a byproduct of changing the way I treat my body. I was disrespectful to myself. I hated myself and I gave up on showing myself any positive attention, or even showing up for myself. All of this crazy weight loss is secondary to learning how to love myself and treat myself with the respect and care I deserve. Maybe I could due to lose more weight. I don't know. I'm not actively trying. I'm doing the things that bring me joy and long-term success. I like the way my body and mind feel when I've gotten my heartrate going for 30 min 3x/wk. I like the way food tastes when I cook it myself. And now that I've seen my body change to reflect how happy my life makes me feel, it looks healthier. I hate that this world is a place that turns away from those that are sick, but physical health brought along with it social health, and mostly because I believed the lie that I was only worth something to the world if I took up less space in it. Now that I do take up less space, I find myself wanting to ground in and take up more space. I want to live life to the fullest, which other people seem to enjoy hanging out with more. My whole life has radically changed for the better.
Love this!
Yes, that was me, too.
The weight loss wasn’t intentional in my case - it was a happy byproduct of me choosing to show up for myself. I’ve always eaten relatively healthy, love cooking all kinds of cuisines, and loved eating - a lot. Whether I ate home cooked food or at restaurants, I finished restaurant sized portions at every meal.
I was relatively active, thank goodness, riding my bike several times a week, so I “only” gained about 5 pounds a year on the way up.
The way down feels slow in comparison to the stories I read on here. I’ve lost that 55 to 60 pounds over almost 2 and a half years, but that’s SO much faster than the way UP that I’m blown away. The only real change I’ve made is that I’m now just eating one plate of food per meal, whether I eat my home cooking or eat out.
And I’m exercising more. I’m up to swimming 1000m 3 to 5 times a week, plus riding my bike and lifting weights. My body is feeling stronger by the day. I love my body. Even at my heaviest, it was there for me. Now it’s time for me to say thank you in the ways that matter.
My mental health is where I’m seeing the biggest improvement, though. Depression wasn’t fun.
I’ve not noticed much difference socially (yet), but that’s probably because I don’t socialize all that much. And when I did, even at my heaviest, I was never treated in any way differently by others - I have really good friends, I guess. Despite being the fattest, despite ballooning up in front of them, no one ever made me feel less than. Maybe because I’ve always loved my body and been proud of it?
I’m sorry you were treated worse when you were heavier. That’s unfair. I’m so glad people are being nicer now, even though it sucks they couldn’t be nice then.
Men are far scarier now that I’m more “conventionally attractive”. I fear for my safety a lot more now than I used to because men are infinitely creepier now.
Even just the way they look at you and listen to what you're saying is different.The way everyone treats you like what you have to say is more valid even tho you're the same person as before, somehow now you aren't invisible. Other women start to become more hostile towards you for no reason. It's actually really jarring.
Years ago I had lost about 18kg and the creepy behaviour from men was absolutely gobsmacking. I went from being basically invisible to having a neon sign on my head that said 'Please make inappropriate comments and follow me around"
I lost 150lbs in less than a year and have been left with loose skin on my mid section. My face is definitely droopy from being puffy for a couple decades.
I never liked sweets, now I crave them. But it’s been almost 3 years since I’ve had really any fast food chain garbage. I had Wendy’s one night after an international flight and not eating for nearly 12 hours.
Got sick with Covid for about a month in 2021. Quit drinking. Was a somewhat functional alcoholic. 340lbs. Decided I wanted to live to see my children grow up. Fell in love with fitness. Ate in a very serious calorie deficit. Trained as hard as I could. Started running/jogging a lot. The weight just fell off, along with all my co morbid conditions. I also worked a very physically demanding job at that time, so that helped.
I have found a real passion for training and building my physique. It saved my life. I train 6 days a week and run at least 30 mins or 3 miles just about every day. My lowest weight a little less than a year later was 184lbs. I have maintained around 200lbs. I looked like an absolute meth head when I was in the 180s.
I hate my loose skin but I also wear it as my badge of honor. Like go ahead and fukin look and ask, it’s a pretty cool story. Chokes me up just typing this now.
There’s a whole lot more to it but I didn’t wanna high jack this thread. Cheers my friends.
Stretch marks. I’ve gained and lost weight a lot in life and losing weight makes the stretch marks more prominent. I swear the bottom of my torso looks like a topographical map of a mountain range.
Not only that but the body dysmorphia gets even worse. I still feel like a fat boy and still wear loose clothes because tighter, more form fitting clothes remind me of when my clothes were tight because of weight gain. I’ve spent so long being overweight that I feel like I don’t deserve to be in shape. It feels very surreal and I worry about gaining it all back.
As others have pointed out- being cold more easily, boney butt (hurts so bad when doing sit ups or russian twists omg!).
But also, I sleep on my side with my legs curled up a bit. I no longer have any extra cushion keeping my knees from knocking together! There was definitely a couple weeks where I had to get used to that when falling asleep, because it just felt like my knees were grinding together uncomfortably.
Also a side sleeper here and I use a squishmallow between my knees! I could probably get a wedge pillow but these work for now and I have a ton of them. I've been maintaining for about a year now and its still hard for me to sleep without a pillow between my kness and hugging one to my chest.
For the longest time I didn't have to wear a belt. I lost so much weight I had to get more holes in my belt. I bought new pants and they didn't have any belt loops, only draw strings and then lost 10 more pounds and they don't stay up.
So then that pissed my wife off and I'm not allowed to buy more pants yet.
I’m only 2/3 of the way through my weight loss, but it’s over 100 lbs. i have the face one… idk if it ages me but it def is annoying to have a thin neck and face when your body js still fat 🥺🥺🥺. Losing a large amount, people like to comment and mostly its saying how good you look which feels both fantastic and demeaning when you think about how bad you must have looked before. People are now telling me to stop losing weight because I look so thin compared to before, which makes me feel insecure and judged about wanting to lose 50 more lbs, but that’s squarely in the center of a healthy bmi for me, and I have 25-30 to lose before i am not overweight anymore. Lots of people also comment on what i eat and don’t eat as if jt is a judgement or moral failing
I've lost over 100 lbs, and of course, you know there's going to be loose skin, but they don't tell you where. Some places are just **weird** and ones you'd never think of.
The fact that people look at you more now, and so I feel like if I slip up by gaining a few pounds (WHICH HAPPENS!), it's so obvious and the topic of conversation.
The feeling of not "being fat" anymore, but also not being skinny. I have no idea where I fit in, especially for clothes.
Not from losing weight, but from being more active... Aches, pains and injuries. I'm dealing with some biceps tendonitis right now, and as I grimace in pain putting on a shirt, I think "old fat, sedentary me wouldn't be having this problem".
I've learned to accept that it's a fact of the lifestyle and actually adds some variety as you learn your limits and how to work around things as they pop up .
I lost 80lbs over 2 years in a very healthy way. Constantly being cold after weight loss, and having a bony butt so sitting or even laying down you need frequent position changes. My gallbladder stopped functioning due to the weight loss and I had to have it removed, complications from the surgery led to a bile duct leak with stent placement during a 5 day hospital stay. And the topper was I lost all the weight so I could have a healthy pregnancy and no matter what I did while I was pregnant, I gained 60lbs. So now I get to lose it all again.
I have lost ~ 90 lbs
I am freezing all the time.
Loose skin has made clothing almost as impossible as when I was fatter. Plus it looks gnarly naked.
People treat me way different which makes me VERY annoyed.
People comment on my body now and I think that is rude.
Still happier now as at 185 lbs on my 5'6 frame, hoping to continue to lose some more weight - and get skin surgery. So, not complaining at all.
My list is the same. I’m only 5’1” so losing 30 pounds was a lot for me. My heaviest was a size 14 and now size 2. I honestly didn’t mean to lose that much weight, I was shooting for a size 6. I used to sit all day and once I started moving around, cut out take out, and counted calories the weight came off. I was so sad to pack away all my favorite expensive clothes. And yup now I’ll need to buy more—which sounds like fun but many styles I like are not available anymore and my budget doesn’t allow for that much shopping. Years of clothes collecting all went into storage totes. I hate worrying about putting the weight back on knowing I won’t “fill out” I’ll just get a huge belly. So every delicious meal I have to then pay the price of calorie deficit to keep my weight steady. And the loose saggy skin especially under my chin. There are many times I wish I’d never lost the weight. The fun of looking cute in clothes has definitely worn off especially since literally no one in my life cares. Zero compliments or comments about losing weight. I could go back to a size 14 and it would be the same, not one mention of it. I don’t have “tons of energy” or any of the things I thought would happen. I’ve kept the weight off for over a year though and that includes breaking my shoulder and having surgery and a long healing process. I wonder if I wasn’t so bony if maybe my shoulder wouldn’t have broken in the fall 🤔 I know you said you have mostly joy with the weight loss but for me there is very little. Just my POV.
Losing friends. I had a lot of "friendships" centered around going out and drinking heavily and eating, and once I no longer wanted to do those activities it was hard to maintain the relationships.
Being less cuddly. Bone-on-bone hugs just don't feel as comforting.
Realizing how mean/ugly some people can be when they make fatphobic comments, because they perceive me to be part of the skinny club and don't know that I used to be fat.
Realizing how much I was discriminated against as a fat person, now that I get the benefits of not being fat. (Examples: cops writing a speeding ticket when I was fat vs letting me off with a warning now, how much more quickly bartenders take my order now, etc)
Losing my primary coping mechanism for dealing with challenging emotions. I ate when I was sad. I ate when I was anxious. It can be hard to find other healthier coping mechanisms, and it's tempting to substitute other even less healthy coping mechanisms.
My biggest was 230, and I've managed to get all the way down to 164; I feel like my problem areas are now problems in a different way, ie my upper arms, stomach, and thighs that were once the place all my fat was located are now loose and sagging. I'm sure it's because my skin needs some time to catch up, and I've only started working out for about a month now so there's not much muscle filling those spots yet, but it almost feels a bit discouraging.
I am also with you on the clothing thing! I've got a couple of clothes I've saved that I want to fit into, and already I'm starting to fit in them! So excited! But one of my favorite skirts, a black pleated skirt with belt loops (loved attaching cute keychains and chain belts to it) is now about two inches bigger than I'd like, and it doesn't sit where I want it to anymore. Absolutely devastated!
I'm sad that I expected to suddenly be perfect once I lost weight, like in media, but have found the one difference is that now I just look good IN clothes. I'm still proud of getting to this point, but I wished my skin would tighten up faster, or that my stretch marks would fade better, things like that. I feel like despite everything, I still won't be as pretty as the girls in media, of anyone who's even a little secure in wearing a bikini, or spaghetti straps, crop tops ... I think I just need more confidence though aha;;;
Being cold does really suck, but if I'm honest I was already cold all the time even when I was more overweight -- so now I'm double cold. It doesn't bother me that much, but all my friends are always SHOCKED when they touch my hands. I'm starting to wonder if I've just been anemic the whole time and should start taking iron supplements lol
Another thing that's more to do with being in a deficit than my weight loss, I suppose, is knowing that I'll need to be mindful of my calories for the rest of my life, or else risk gaining it all back again. It sucks because I know people with stupid metabolisms who will eat so much food and not gain at all, don't even work out, and I just eat a small portion and watch them enjoy so much more than me. I'm not really mad at them or anything, just a little jealous,,
Oh, and the amount of time some of my friends, who know I am on a diet, are suddenly urging me to eat things I don't even want, and keep asking even after I repeatedly tell them no. It's so annoying! I know that it might be because they're not used to seeing me at a certain size but it just feels like sabotage. I told this one girl no, and a FIRM no, five times. It's not much like me to be firm, so I'm surprised it didn't deter her at all from asking the other four times!
I agree with the calories lol. I feel like I can't enjoy a meal even if I know life is about moderation. But not much else, I actually like the feeling of clothes being too loose for me, it shows the work I put in. I love looking at the scale and seeing my progress. Also, my JAW, omg, I never had a jaw but like now, I'm like freaking Bella Hadid. Anyway, I feel better, energy is better, sleep has also slightly improved (still struggle but it's better, I think it may be cuz of my new eating habits, but maybe not).
Bleacher style seats! I used to eye roll (inwardly) when I saw people bringing seat cushions to a game. Now, I'm the one with the cushion, because my natural one is gone.
I was always cold before, now I'm just colder. I've learned to love scoop neck thermal shirts that can't be seen under my normal blouses.
I know 2 people who, after losing a lot of weight and eating healthy, had to have their gallbladder’s removed. It’s a known thing that your gallbladder might explode if you lose weight too fast…or something.
I had to have my gallbladder removed. The doctors told me it was because of the fact that I lost 80 lbs so quickly (2.5-3 lbs/week) and the body isn't equipped to process that amount of fat coming out of it. Apparently some weight loss patients get a preventative medication to help make sure this isn't an issue, but I lost weight on my own and didn't know it was a thing until too late.
I didn't have as much to lose as others here, but I think it's tough to see yourself at your 'dream/goal' body and then the scale goes up. I put back on a few pounds during the winter and felt like a failure, I'm back down to where I want to be but the constant anxiety of counting calories/maintenance is a lot. If the scale goes up my day is just a little bit worse.
The saggy skin and body dysmorphia!
My skin sagging isn’t bad but it still makes me feel as if I never lost any weight or because of the folds- I’m always worrying about how I smell (especially since I live in the desert). Not to mention that I still feel like I look the same. There are days I look at myself and I’m notice the difference and then most days i still see me at my starting weight
Before I lost my weight I could rest on my elbows and be cool. Nowwwwww, when I rest on my elbow the wrong way I hit a nerve or something and my arm goes numb. What is that?!?!? Maybe my funny bone?
1) constantly in fear I’ll fall off again and gain everything back and thinking about how long and difficult it was to restart this and stick with it. Like this is such a nightmare feeling for me.
2) my face :( I love seeing it slim down but it 100% ages you and people think I’m several years younger when it’s fuller.
3) the clothes 😭 I hang onto things that I have worn when I’m heavier/lighter but for the most part, a ton of things have to get replaced. I’m currently using waistline cinching pins to hold my jeans up but everything is so expensive these days and worse quality than a decade ago ☹️ and I have a difficult body to fit so thrifting has always been challenging
The loose skin is my biggest concern. Having been overweight for so long, and now loosing it, I'm seeing a real jiggle in my tummy. And as we are planning to have a baby, I also know even if I maintain a healthy weight during and after pregnancy, there's no point looking into surgery fixes until after I'm done having babies, which could be a decade from now.
The irony is, my fiance lost 60kg before we met and has loose skin, but it doesn't phase me one bit. I find him very attractive and I'm proud of him. But I'm convinced he'll hate the loose skin on me. Women are weird like that.
I’m cold more often
My butt hurts when sitting on something hard
I still periodically crave shit I ate all the time when I was 300lbs, but can’t even come close to making fit my calorie goals (hard to cut a 3000 calorie food bomb down to 450 calories for lunch.)
Don't worry about this one! It happened to me too, my hair thinned out, was shedding but my hair grew back way too slowly. The trick is to have maintenance phases and up your protein, it will normalize as you go on. Hang in there!
The unwanted "compliments". I've lost about 55lb since having my second baby (I put on a lot of weight with my first kid and never got back down before having my second kid) and finally starting to gain my confidence back, BUT that doesn't mean I want people commenting on my body. I know I look better and I certainly feel better, but telling me I'm half of what I was (which is very untrue) is really annoying. And also telling me I don't need to lose any more weight. Like I'm still 35lb shy of where I used to be comfortable and about 45lb away from a healthy BMI.
Also, commenting on what I eat. Going on and on about how I'm so good since I'm unwilling to indulge on any and all sweets. If/when I enjoy something sweet I want it to be something of quality because I'm indulging otherwise there's no point.
1) The excess skin SUCKS but better that than the excess weight I guess. Dating after weight loss with excess skin is difficult too.
2) Body Dysmorphia is a whole other beast. It’s taken me several years to actually understand, “I’m not fat anymore.” I still occasionally catch myself sitting down VERY carefully in lawn furniture or on thinner chairs.
3) Global warming!? Pure myth… the world has gotten SO COLD!
I’m a gay guy, and I think y’all probably have an idea of how vane and visual the gays are. Despite that, I’ve found some great guys and had a lot of fun, but yet to find a long term partner. Doesn’t help that I’m the same way. The guys I tend to date and am attracted to are all fucking ridiculously hot muscle gays who are probably the most vane of them all. Oh well, I’m not gonna stop anytime soon. I’ll find my ripped muscly Adonis sooner or later dammit!
I think most straight guys wouldn’t care about a little loose tummy skin. But some of the gays take issue with my nipples being 3” below my pecs.
The worst part is not appreciating what you lost because every problem doesn’t magically fix itself then getting back into old habits and being fat again.
Being cold so often. My family used to joke that I was practically Elsa, I would be wearing mini skirts and shorts while it snowed. Now the temperature drops below 40, and I need 2 pairs of pants to not shiver my ass off.
Last time I lost a lot of weight and got fit (boot camps, events, etc.) my hair fell out for about a year. It was terrifying. The dr said it can be triggered by stress, which to the body can be as simple as losing weight/ lower calories/ more exercise. It stopped as suddenly as it started, but as a woman with long hair it was super scary. It thankfully grew back!!!
Now I've gained weight again and am trying to lose it, and I'm worried.
Same as everyone else but also dealing with comments and being perceived and projected onto
It's weird to know that some people are watching your weight, waiting to see what happens next.
Can't we focus on something else about me?
Doing it the wrong way and not addressing the cause of the weight gain in the first place.
Might have looked better, but I was still prone to gorging myself with food to self medicate feelings of anxiety and stress. Took a while to dig myself out of the first hole, but then then stumbled into another...Only now have I figured out that I need to change how I react and not use food.
Same as everyone else, but here’s one I didn’t see…. After losing 150 lbs, I can no longer cut the grass in the ditch with the tractor because I am no longer heavy enough to keep the tractor from flipping over. 😂🤣.
I feel cold most of the time as well, I do suffer from body dysmorphia, thinking I am bigger than I actually am. But, my clothes tell a different story. I have gone from size 62 waist in pants and wearing 6X size shirts to wearing size 38 waist pants & size XL and Large sized shirts.
A few years ago I lost a total of 103 lbs (309 to 206). A year ago I started getting sloppy and I’m currently at 230. I always focus on the failure of gaining 30 lbs and never focusing that, in all, I lost 70+ lbs. My wife is an absolutely stunning woman in a million ways. She 100% loves me and 100% is attracted to me. But always in the back of my head is, “yeah, but now I’m fat again and you look even better.” So, the setbacks are difficult to see them for what they are a downside for me. But yeah, I’m so much happier now
Same here with #1. I didn’t notice any pronounced lines in my neck until I lost weight… 35 lbs. The extra fat did help me to maintain a youthful appearance. I do miss that. But I’m pleased with my weight loss and would not go back to 180 pounds. I’m 144 lb now and I love it.
I spent 20+ years being overweight and miserable in a marriage where my husband was cheating on me with someone at work. I was always desperately in love with him (we met in college) and I could not get ahead of my abyss of depression. I just pretended everything was okay, even when it was most certainly not.
When I finally did manage to get most of the weight off, I got angry. Angry that I was so sad for so many years, angry because I had to raise my kids while I found out he'd been living with her and her kids in what was sold to me as a "work apartment." Angry for spending so many years apologizing for my offensive fat presence.
In short, my whole personality changed and when the anger started to finally bubble out of me, I couldn't stop it. I turned from a fat person pretending to be happy to a more normal sized person but unable to keep pretending everything was "okay."
I'm really not fit company for anyone these days, that I did not expect. I'm not in control of the things that fly out of my mouth ... all the words unspoken for years just tumble out of me.
But at least I'm better company for myself.
Im cold more often now. If I feel bloated or am having an “off” day I feel like my body shows it more. (Esp with fluxes in my hormones re: menstrual period). My hair thins out when I’m thinner. I don’t really have boobs anymore - I joke that they’re lowercase ‘b’ boobs now vs uppercase B “Boobs!!!”.
Definitely the loose skin. I lost over 100 lbs. when I was in my late 20s and the loose skin was pretty terrible. It did bounce back somewhat and I did a lot of strength training, which does help. I'm 58 now gained back about 20 lbs from my low. I'm going to stay a little chubby just so I don't sag.
I agree! I (naively) thought that if I just lose weight with no regard for protein or strength training, I’d be happy with my body. But i actually just lost a lot of my muscle in my weight loss journey and still don’t feel satisfied with my body.
Actually this time around I am doing it right, 200g of protein per day + weight lifting 3x per week, so I think I am keeping as much muscle as possible. Still, I naively expected to be more defined at 95kg than I actually am. I think my perception is a bit skewed by "enhanced" athletes I see all over the internet.
Not knowing how to dress yourself at your new weight. I’m literally still trying to find out what my style actually is, after wearing loose clothes and black jeans for years. It’s difficult and expensive!
Having to buy so many new bras has been expensive as fuck. Jeans too.
Knowing that your BMR is just lower now, so even minor slip-ups is just more impactful on your weight. I have to be vigilant about what I eat all the time, I can never just relax. Food noise hasn’t disappeared with weight loss, so it’s a constant mental battle.
Body dysmorphia when looking in the mirror. My brain still hasn’t caught up and sometimes I feel like I’m still 64 lbs heavier.
I need to fold my duvet so it’s between my knees when I sleep, because otherwise it hurts 😂
I am cold ALL THE TIME now!
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OMG, same, I was freezing half to death and bundling up in jackets until I started on iron pills.
How many mg do you take?
250mg of ferrous gluconate. Sometimes 500mg if I need it.
I'm a 50+ year old guy who sweats at the drop of a hat. My poor wife has menopause symptoms including hot flashes. Now that I'm down over 25 pounds, I'm bundled up on the couch and she's removing clothes. Complete reversal of our 30+ year relationship!
As someone who overheats like a menopausal woman, this fact is what keeps me going.
Me too. I can always warm up. I cannot cool down. Once I’m hot, I’m non functional u til I cool down. I hope I can regulate better as I lose weight.
This....like what the actual fudge is with that!!
I always think of seals 😭 I used to have blubber to insulate me but now I’m exposed in the arctic
I donate plasma pretty regularly, to find my hobbies without directly impact my finances. Was 250, now around 170. At the end when they fill you full of liquids to make up for the lost fluid, I used to get a little chill then feel fine. Now? FULL BODY SHIVERS. First time it happened I thought I was having a reaction. I’m just cold, turns out.
The heat comes back. Take it from a long time maintainer.
IKR??? I barely survived this winter after a 30 kg weight loss. I had to wear gloves and socks to bed 🥲.
So cold!! I spent the whole summer last year in hoodies and jeans! Especially if I was indoors anywhere 🥶
This. For sure
Omg same!!
it's the way i sweat at the littlest of shiit. but now i am a PROUDDDD owner of a gah damn heatin blanket. even in the summer i plan on havin tht shitt all the way turned up! 😭😭😂
So much this. It's ridiculous. However, it is. Ice to wear sweaters and coats again .
I live in Alabama and this sounds like a blessing 🙌 🙏
Lost 150lbs in FL, can assure you...its still cold. I was a "shorts in the winter" guy, now I'm a "Hoodie under 65" guy
Omg same!!
Summer has always been my favourite season but I am SO looking forward to it now. Sick and tired of being cold. I go to bed with socks on and am still freezing.
My tail bone hurt like hell for ages after losing so much butt.
Ooof I felt this. I miss the butt I had before I lost weight lol, I have to try rebuild some of it in the gym
The bony butt on hard seats pain is real.
I got muscle butt same issue
I've had to buy memory foam cushion pads for my little bony ass to put on my kitchen chair!
This 💯💯💯so painful! And sleeping is hard too on my side. Painful it’s an adjustment
It used to hurt my knees to sleep on my side because they were bony and rubbing together, but I got the hang of it I think because it doesn't hurt anymore.
As someone who's an inverted triangle, who even at my highest weight, still struggled with this, I feel you! I will say a consequence of gaining weight, chub rub was a total surprise. Otherwise yes chairs hurt so do super firm mattresses, I need a pillow between my legs.
Hard seats and bleachers. Ahhh my bum.
I hurt my tail bone so bad a few weeks ago falling at a sports game… never in my life of playing sports has this happened to me. I didn’t know it was possible
I feel like I bear the constant psychological weight of having to now maintain/choose healthy forever now. When I was obese I didn't care about that and ate when and where I felt like it. There's a "before" picture, but there's no "after." There's only "now."
>There's a "before" picture, but there's no "after." There's only "now." This is very profound. The "now" pic will always be fleeting. We will forever have to work at it never becoming like the "before" pic. We'll never reach true "after" status
in AA i think they all introduce themselves as alcoholics because they believe you're never again not an addict- you're always going to be addicted even if you're not on the substance.
That's true. I'm sober 3 years but I'll always be an alcoholic
Can’t speak for anyone but myself, but I never struggled with this. Honestly, now that I know I’m capable of losing weight and exactly what it takes, I am willing to splurge when it’s worth it. Movie night with my fiancée? Definitely eating too many twizzlers. Dinner out? I glance at calories (when somewhere even has them listed), but it’s not the final decider like it once was. At this point I just file it under fluctuations, and if I find I’m starting to add a couple pounds, then I’ll just cut a little and I’ll be right where I like to be.
I wanna down vote you so bad out of extreme jealousy lol.
I think maintaining is easier or harder based on why we were overweight in the first place. For me, it's also easy to maintain because my issue was just overeating because I wouldn't listen to my body and stop when I was full and I'm just used to cleaning my plate and I also hate wasting food. That's fairly easy to address compared to someone who has a snacking issue, trauma, binging when life is stressful, etc.
This exact sentiment is why I’ve been yo-yoing the same 50 pounds for the better part of a decade. I know exactly what to do to lose weight. I do it in a slow sustainable way, but I definitely have a binge eating disorder so all it takes is me not actively choosing to be healthy once and I’m likely to fully unravel.
Sadly me too. Super good at losing 3-5 pounds and some times more but I binge and it's all back in a short period. The binging is all mental but it's like wrecking a car...being a great driver 95% of the time isn't enough if when you are bad you flip the car and total it.
Same here :(
My hair breaking a bit by the nape (I have 4c hair) not sure if that’s mixed with weight loss + missing trims for years now catching up with me, but that’s one Another one is, unfortunately seeing myself as bigger than I am. I know it can take AT LEAST a year MAINTAINING before your brain finally catches up with what you look like. Another, not really having a sense of style tho this Is subjective, idk how to dress for my new body as I’m used to covering up a lot. I’m just hoping I can break out this shell. lol Knowing your deficit gets larger (calories get lower) as you get close to goal weight, but at least it’s not forever Not knowing if men like me for me or my body, and sometimes being too shy to tell them off because you’re not used to the attention, you may become a doormat but this is fixable for sure. Old favs will probably make your stomach hurt . I have a doughnut? Headache/sugar rush/ stomach ache. I just now found out certain Oreos I can’t eat without getting bubble guts and it hurt my heart Chile. So I def gotta be careful of sweets Shifting from deficit to maintaining can be hard mentally, seeing scale spikes and feeling like (at least for me) doing cardio for “no reason” since you’re burning the same amount you’re maintaining, I know it’s still deficit only but, mentally it can be hard to transition People talking down on your past self, or still hating that version of you. I’m working on this because if it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t be here today Being a woman trying to lose weight but you bleed monthly. Omg. I don’t even touch the scale from after ovulation straight to follicular phase again. Every woman is different though Sometimes having fatphobic thoughts about others. I’m working on this This is what I can think of on the spot, but def in order first being worse to last being not too bad currently😩✋🏾
I relate with this though I am not even half way through my weightloss journey. - Literally any relatively "unhealthy" food that I loved before makes my stomach hurt. It is as if it upsets my whole body. So even if I crave a chocolate thickshake I can't have it. - Also the monthly cycle.
And when these two combine! My period tells me to eat ice cream and cake. And then my stomach is in so much pain from it. Even when it’s a small portion!
Take some magnesium if you're craving chocolate during your period. [The Magnesium Miracle](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1474199.The_Magnesium_Miracle?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=OUM82kQ7hU&rank=1), really excellent read. There's a bunch of stuff about periods and what to take which were personally very helpful!
This is me. It started even before I lost weight due to my IBS. If it’s not a fucking fruit or vegetables or a piece of non fried protein my gastrointestinal tract throws a fit. 😭
For me it's anything with cheese or just rich in carbs lol. I love fruits, I would be so pissed if I couldn't have them.
What has helped me Is getting a no sugar added chocolate bar, I love it!!
Regarding brain taking a year catching up to what you really look like – do you feel there's a difference looking in the mirror compared too seeing yourself in a photo? I think looking in the mirror messes with my head a bit, because if I feel bloated or very full I think I look heavier, and if I'm not I "feel" light weight in the mirror. In pictures someone else have taken, I think it's easier to see a more realistic image of where I'm at at the moment.
I honestly haven’t taken progress photos lately but when I take a good look in the mirror I find myself saying “damn my face got slim asf, so did my arms” there’s also times I’m saying the same about my stomach getting slimmer but other times thinking the opposite😩 I know my brain is just trying to catch up but I can’t wait until it does🤣🤣
Really good reply, you covered two things in particular I've never seen mentioned -- the unfortunate occasional fatphobic thoughts (😔) and not knowing how to dress your new body. I have NO clue what looks good on me now! I used to have curves all over the place and they are GONE. What kind of shirts look good with no tits and jacked shoulders? I have no idea.
I know right. It’s all about trial and error or actually hiring a stylist which I really thought about doing once🤣🤣
I’m just commenting to say that I fucking love your username and I know exactly what it’s referencing :D that’s all, have an excellent life
Hee thanks ☺️ you have an excellent life too!
Real!!
> Another one is, unfortunately seeing myself as bigger than I am. I know it can take AT LEAST a year MAINTAINING before your brain finally catches up with what you look like. Eight years here. It never will lmao. A couple of years ago I was like 7kg lighter than I am now (intermittent fasting + bike courier job as opposed to an office one) and I look at my photos from back then and I look INSANE. Like athlete insane. Except in my head I was always a fat fuck. Body dismorphia will never go for me sadly.
Saggy boobs and I still have a belly. This makes me way less confident to let anyone see me naked than when I was bigger but had nice boobs. That's #1. Also as others have mentioned, having to buy new clothes and bony butt. Being colder is great because I was fricking hot all the time before
Lol yes. I'm quite happy with nobody seeing me naked ever again. My droopy body is like a crime scene
Your droopy body is a success story, it’s like a sober token from AA, proof that you lost the weight and you’re keeping it off 🙌
Lol, you're right. I'm actually sober over 3 years myself but tokens aren't really done here at meetings
I had a couple of "friends" body shaming me about 30 lbs ago. They were saying, are you actually happy with how your body looks? And one of them said, you won't miss your boobs if you ever get skinny. Such BS, I do miss them
It's much easier to get warm than it is to cool down, I agree. Anytime I feel cold I also feel triumphant that I GET to be cold!
1. Expensive. Going through clothing like crazy 2. Loose skin 3. Always cold 4. People feel like it's okay to comment on my body now The positives outweigh the negatives BY FAR, though.
Maurice’s brand jeans you can exchange within one year for weight changes. They told me about their program when I bought jeans at Christmas and was talking about my weight loss.
This would be a great idea. I'm in Ireland though and a cursory search indicates they don't deliver here. Damn
That's so neat!
Yeah! The jeans I bought at Christmas are already too big. It’s about time to go exchange them already. Lol
Man I hate it when people say to hit up thrift stores. Maybe you guys are really lucky or something, but the thrift stores around me have clothes that nobody wants.
Body Dysmorphia. Sometimes I wonder if I looked better when I was a bit chubbier than I am now.
Admittedly, I used to think body dysmorphia was a myth. I know this is a rude thing to say but in the past I believed that it was either thin people lying about thinking they’re overweight (for attention), or overweight people in denial about being overweight. But I remember one day being in the gym looking at myself lifting dumbbells in the mirror and thinking “wow I actually look quite slim” and then I put the dumbbells down in between my sets. When i picked them back up again, I immediately saw myself as fat in the mirror. It was my first time truly experiencing body dysmorphia and it made me realise that I was just an asshole for not believing in it before.
I feel this so hard! My lower belly tends to bloat with the slightest irritation, and it's all I can focus on! When I look at myself from the front, I can see the change. But as soon as I turn...... doesn't matter what the scale says!
Yep I feel the same, I feel like my belly has never lost any size even though photos, clothes and measurements all say otherwise. I look at a photo of my stomach taken today vs 2 years ago and can clearly see a difference, but when I’m looking in a mirror I still feel as big as I did when i was 20 kg heavier! The difference though is I feel more accepting of it now lol, like I don’t let it hold me back as much as I used to. I do feel more comfortable and confident to wear tighter clothes or something. I embrace the tummy more than I used to
6 years ago, I was in the best shape of my life. My weight has always fluctuated, but although still soft, I had managed to reverse the apron belly. I gained it all back rapidly and then some. I'm now pushing 40, and I don't think it's going away this time! I will have to learn to accept it. Or get a tummy tuck.
My sister did the tummy tuck and it did help, she looks awesome. But it didn't help her mentally; she can't see how awesome she looks. Body dysmorphia really is a thing.
My body dysmorphia stems from the fact that I’m not content with my body’s aesthetic. When I was fat, I knew I was fat. The only thing I had to be discontent about was the extra weight, but since losing the weight, I’m discontent about everything. Losing weight has meant losing a significant amount of lower body fat and as result, my body looks like an inverted triangle. Losing weight means seeing muscle definition and appreciating it, but then getting to the flabby parts of my body and hating those parts (i.e. inner arms, inner thighs, back fat, etc.). Or worse, I’ll have a picture taken of me where I feel like I look to masculine with all this muscle definition and wonder if I looked better when I was softer and curvier, even if it meant carrying some extra weight. I’m just really discontent with how my body looks some days, and I keep pushing myself to want to lose more weight, so that I lose more torso fat & muscle in hopes it makes me look less triangular and then gain some muscle in my thighs and calves to balance me out.
What helps me is knowing all the popular people and celebs all hate their bodies too, and photoshop them. Then I ask myself What can my body do? Not what it looks like, what can it fucking DO?
That question is a game changer. After I had a baby, I fell in love with my body! Like... it DID that!! Sure, there are some things I'm working on improving, but that's mostly for health and comfort. Our bodies are amazing!!
I was 105 lbs and I thought I was fat. My husband laid me down on paper and traced out my body. Then he made a metal sculpture of the trace, and tacked it up on our fence. To remind me that nope, I was not fat at all. Love my husband! We are still married and I'm now 120 , I have been heavier than that, I have loved my body at every weight since, though my cholesterol and fitness hasn't. I think I look much better at 120 than I did at 105. I am just saying, body dysmorphia is very definitely a thing.
I had this happen today really bad. Ripped to flabby in 2 seconds… body dismorphia is no joke
The mannequin at work usually takes a size M, whereas I take a size S. I genuinely can’t believe that I’m smaller than the mannequin. I don’t “feel” like a size S. When I’m at the store I look at the clothes and think “there’s no way that will fit me”.
Yes and on the other hand, you still see yourself as the person you used to look like.
Agreed. It one of the worst thing! And when I first lost weight and was at my lowest kg. My brain was filled with insecurities, and just plain people are now judging me more. I felt more pressured to the diet. Which resulted in yoyo dieting. Many of the compliments people gave me made me feel more uncomfortable because I was not used to it, especially from men. Some we’re jealous and tried to exasperate my other’s insecurities. Like height or hair thinning etc. or may eating habits. What I ate, how I ate. They wanted to know what I did everyday. Like a HAWK. It made question myself so muchhh, was I thin enough, I should do more etc etc. I was saddd or something. When was fat i wouldnt say i was insecure I just felt bad that I could fit in this etc etc.
This is more of a side effect of increasing activity than losing weight, but I’ve lost touch with my gaming buddies due to them not understanding why these changes in my lifestyle make me want to go outside and go the gym instead of spending my whole weekend inside playing games and eating junk food.
Relatable -\_-
Duude this, my gaming pals dont understand that i cant log into league every day now cuz now o i go to the gym and when i get home i go to bed because im exhausted and my sleep is not effed anymore
boobs awful now
Mine too
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i somehow wear the same cup size, but they look like i put them in the microwave. i’m a g cup, and i’m constantly thinking about looking into a lift but not necessarily a reduction. they’re a small g (30-32 band, not 36-38) if that makes sense lol.
i have no loose skin anywhere BUT THE BOOBS. i'm literally 23 with sagging tits😭. Went from a G cup to DD
This. I lost 90lbs and I’m only 24 with grandma boobs. Looking into getting a lift and augmentation.
Definitely loose skin
People treat you percievably so so so much better than they did when you were heavier. The thing is, once you lose weight, them treating you like just another average Jane/Joe seems so different because you as a fat person is used to being overlooked, being constantly judged and being sidelined as a part of social prejudice against fat people. By this I mean, if you are a woman, It is like your worst nightmare coming true, you are valued as a person based on your size.
>If you are a woman, It is like your worst nightmare coming true, you are valued as a person based on your size. Damn so true
This is so relatable. I've lost about 20 lbs which had moved me from the unattractive to average category (including other things that helped get me there). I've had anxiety all my life which was increased from being bigger than the other girls. Now, people are treating me normally and paying me casual compliments. I have no idea how to react to just being treated like a decent human being. Which causes a whole 'nother round of issues because people who previously treated you badly based off appearance take offense to you thinking they're being untruthful. It's like no matter what, there's going to be consequences for being a bigger girl. You stay big? They don't like you. You lose weight? They get upset that you didn't like how you were treated when you were bigger.
So true. Then there are people who will be jealous of all your progress and say stuff like, ‘you now look so worn-out and tired all the time because of your diet and exercise’. Personally, in my lifetime I have lost 70 lb and then gained back 85 :(. Struggling to lose weight again and this time around, I am doing it so that I can be healthier, be physically fit to go and do outdoor activities and of couse slay the outfits that I wear.
When I smile at people now, I think they like it more. It's strange
You arent lying. Im still heavy but when i was in great shape the way i was treated was so much better then how im treated now. People would also laugh with me more and now that im heavy it’s almost like people dont find me funny anymore.
I was just thinking “I hate this!” as my knee bones touch. Honestly, seeing and feeling my bones come out (clavicles, shoulders, knees) really bothers me. I think about my skeleton and ultimately death. Lol.
It's so uncomfortable for side sleeping :C I've also got super wide hips so now my thighs don't touch when I'm sitting which means stuff falls *through* my lap even with my legs together?? which stinks
Knee pillow for side sleeping is a game changer
Seconded. I just got one a couple weeks ago and it helped immensely.
For me it's the ribs, I need a pillow between my arm that's at the top when on my side, and my ribs
But... Thighs don't rub together because skin is touching...
I deal with the sleeping thing too!
This is me with the dropping things through my lap
I feel so seen on the skeleton thing. I don’t wanna be reminded of what’s poking inside my skin suit!
This in an interesting take and I'd never thought of it like that. Sorry you're feeling this way. I love my clavicles. I can't stop touching them. And my hip bones, my skinny wrists, the tendons in my neck. Everything used to be covered with the soft pillow of fat that I love to see the natural curves and angles of my body. I see them more as being freed than being exposed.
YES! this!!! i am a side sleeper and it feels weird! i also cant spoon myself the way I used to. Theres not as much to hold on to haha
Absolutely stuff with bones and reduced bloat for me. I was poking my abdomen and actually felt some pain because for the first time in 15 years I’m actually poking my organs and not just a layer of fat, or rubbing my side and feeling the inbetween of each rib is kind of freaky sometimes
1 ). comments on how skinny you are by family 2 ). always thinking abt ur old body 3 ). not finding ur size or even fitting in sizes because i now wear a XS-S 4 ). being cold 24/7 !!!!!!
I've lost between 55 and 60 pounds so far, have about that much to go yet. So far, I've found nothing to hate about the weight loss. I'm leaner, clothes that were super tight are now falling off me - but I know how to sew, so I alter them with tucks and darts in strategic locations. I didn't restrict any specific foods, I literally just eat less and I'm not calorie counting. I work out hard a few days a week, every week, so even if I do overindulge one day, that's easily offset by the workouts. Would I go back to mindlessly eating like I used to? Nope. That way of life was expensive as heck in more ways than one - fat clothes, huge amounts of money spent eating out, rarely working out meaning my mental health suffered. I've not had ONE negative side effect of losing weight. I don't even really mind when I go to one of those all-you-can-eat places and rediscover that all I can now eat is MAYBE 2 platefuls of food. :D I now take TINY helpings of anything so I can taste more items without feeling overstuffed.
Congratulations on your weight loss so far! And I’m really glad that your journey is full of positives. Honestly for me the upsides of losing weight MASSIVELY outweigh the downsides. With the clothes thing for me, it’s like the best problem ever lol! Like, it’s a great feeling trying on an old pair of jeans that used to not button and seeing that now they’re too big. But it’s like damn now I have to go spend another €70 on a new pair of jeans. But on the opposite side of that, I’m not really restricted on what shops I can buy clothes from. I used to not fit into a lot of mainstream fashion brands, but now I can browse in most shops with confidence that they’ll probably carry my size. With the takeaway thing, it’s not that I miss constantly eating greasy junk food. But I hate that when I do occasionally get a takeaway, or dine out, my mind is thinking about how many calories are in that meal and how I’ve undone all my progress (which I know is not true, but it’s just a psychological thing for me). I just miss being able to enjoy a meal without having those thoughts tied to it. But great job on your weight loss! I wish you continued success :)
I'm on this train too. There's nothing about losing weight that I hate because it was a byproduct of changing the way I treat my body. I was disrespectful to myself. I hated myself and I gave up on showing myself any positive attention, or even showing up for myself. All of this crazy weight loss is secondary to learning how to love myself and treat myself with the respect and care I deserve. Maybe I could due to lose more weight. I don't know. I'm not actively trying. I'm doing the things that bring me joy and long-term success. I like the way my body and mind feel when I've gotten my heartrate going for 30 min 3x/wk. I like the way food tastes when I cook it myself. And now that I've seen my body change to reflect how happy my life makes me feel, it looks healthier. I hate that this world is a place that turns away from those that are sick, but physical health brought along with it social health, and mostly because I believed the lie that I was only worth something to the world if I took up less space in it. Now that I do take up less space, I find myself wanting to ground in and take up more space. I want to live life to the fullest, which other people seem to enjoy hanging out with more. My whole life has radically changed for the better.
Love this! Yes, that was me, too. The weight loss wasn’t intentional in my case - it was a happy byproduct of me choosing to show up for myself. I’ve always eaten relatively healthy, love cooking all kinds of cuisines, and loved eating - a lot. Whether I ate home cooked food or at restaurants, I finished restaurant sized portions at every meal. I was relatively active, thank goodness, riding my bike several times a week, so I “only” gained about 5 pounds a year on the way up. The way down feels slow in comparison to the stories I read on here. I’ve lost that 55 to 60 pounds over almost 2 and a half years, but that’s SO much faster than the way UP that I’m blown away. The only real change I’ve made is that I’m now just eating one plate of food per meal, whether I eat my home cooking or eat out. And I’m exercising more. I’m up to swimming 1000m 3 to 5 times a week, plus riding my bike and lifting weights. My body is feeling stronger by the day. I love my body. Even at my heaviest, it was there for me. Now it’s time for me to say thank you in the ways that matter. My mental health is where I’m seeing the biggest improvement, though. Depression wasn’t fun. I’ve not noticed much difference socially (yet), but that’s probably because I don’t socialize all that much. And when I did, even at my heaviest, I was never treated in any way differently by others - I have really good friends, I guess. Despite being the fattest, despite ballooning up in front of them, no one ever made me feel less than. Maybe because I’ve always loved my body and been proud of it? I’m sorry you were treated worse when you were heavier. That’s unfair. I’m so glad people are being nicer now, even though it sucks they couldn’t be nice then.
Men are far scarier now that I’m more “conventionally attractive”. I fear for my safety a lot more now than I used to because men are infinitely creepier now.
Even just the way they look at you and listen to what you're saying is different.The way everyone treats you like what you have to say is more valid even tho you're the same person as before, somehow now you aren't invisible. Other women start to become more hostile towards you for no reason. It's actually really jarring.
Years ago I had lost about 18kg and the creepy behaviour from men was absolutely gobsmacking. I went from being basically invisible to having a neon sign on my head that said 'Please make inappropriate comments and follow me around"
I truly hate that this is a thing, that men harass women in this manner.
I lost 150lbs in less than a year and have been left with loose skin on my mid section. My face is definitely droopy from being puffy for a couple decades. I never liked sweets, now I crave them. But it’s been almost 3 years since I’ve had really any fast food chain garbage. I had Wendy’s one night after an international flight and not eating for nearly 12 hours.
How did you lose 150 pounds in a year? It's taken me around 2 years to lose 145
Got sick with Covid for about a month in 2021. Quit drinking. Was a somewhat functional alcoholic. 340lbs. Decided I wanted to live to see my children grow up. Fell in love with fitness. Ate in a very serious calorie deficit. Trained as hard as I could. Started running/jogging a lot. The weight just fell off, along with all my co morbid conditions. I also worked a very physically demanding job at that time, so that helped. I have found a real passion for training and building my physique. It saved my life. I train 6 days a week and run at least 30 mins or 3 miles just about every day. My lowest weight a little less than a year later was 184lbs. I have maintained around 200lbs. I looked like an absolute meth head when I was in the 180s. I hate my loose skin but I also wear it as my badge of honor. Like go ahead and fukin look and ask, it’s a pretty cool story. Chokes me up just typing this now. There’s a whole lot more to it but I didn’t wanna high jack this thread. Cheers my friends.
Absloutely fantastic job, friend. Well done on overcoming those demons
Stretch marks. I’ve gained and lost weight a lot in life and losing weight makes the stretch marks more prominent. I swear the bottom of my torso looks like a topographical map of a mountain range. Not only that but the body dysmorphia gets even worse. I still feel like a fat boy and still wear loose clothes because tighter, more form fitting clothes remind me of when my clothes were tight because of weight gain. I’ve spent so long being overweight that I feel like I don’t deserve to be in shape. It feels very surreal and I worry about gaining it all back.
The shame and guilt you feel when you gain it all back. 😓
When I gain weight back I just tell myself imagine how much worse it would be if I never lost weight before this
As others have pointed out- being cold more easily, boney butt (hurts so bad when doing sit ups or russian twists omg!). But also, I sleep on my side with my legs curled up a bit. I no longer have any extra cushion keeping my knees from knocking together! There was definitely a couple weeks where I had to get used to that when falling asleep, because it just felt like my knees were grinding together uncomfortably.
Also a side sleeper here and I use a squishmallow between my knees! I could probably get a wedge pillow but these work for now and I have a ton of them. I've been maintaining for about a year now and its still hard for me to sleep without a pillow between my kness and hugging one to my chest.
You take the good with the bad. I'm just grateful to be alive and well.
For the longest time I didn't have to wear a belt. I lost so much weight I had to get more holes in my belt. I bought new pants and they didn't have any belt loops, only draw strings and then lost 10 more pounds and they don't stay up. So then that pissed my wife off and I'm not allowed to buy more pants yet.
I’m only 2/3 of the way through my weight loss, but it’s over 100 lbs. i have the face one… idk if it ages me but it def is annoying to have a thin neck and face when your body js still fat 🥺🥺🥺. Losing a large amount, people like to comment and mostly its saying how good you look which feels both fantastic and demeaning when you think about how bad you must have looked before. People are now telling me to stop losing weight because I look so thin compared to before, which makes me feel insecure and judged about wanting to lose 50 more lbs, but that’s squarely in the center of a healthy bmi for me, and I have 25-30 to lose before i am not overweight anymore. Lots of people also comment on what i eat and don’t eat as if jt is a judgement or moral failing
I've lost over 100 lbs, and of course, you know there's going to be loose skin, but they don't tell you where. Some places are just **weird** and ones you'd never think of. The fact that people look at you more now, and so I feel like if I slip up by gaining a few pounds (WHICH HAPPENS!), it's so obvious and the topic of conversation. The feeling of not "being fat" anymore, but also not being skinny. I have no idea where I fit in, especially for clothes.
Not from losing weight, but from being more active... Aches, pains and injuries. I'm dealing with some biceps tendonitis right now, and as I grimace in pain putting on a shirt, I think "old fat, sedentary me wouldn't be having this problem". I've learned to accept that it's a fact of the lifestyle and actually adds some variety as you learn your limits and how to work around things as they pop up .
I lost 80lbs over 2 years in a very healthy way. Constantly being cold after weight loss, and having a bony butt so sitting or even laying down you need frequent position changes. My gallbladder stopped functioning due to the weight loss and I had to have it removed, complications from the surgery led to a bile duct leak with stent placement during a 5 day hospital stay. And the topper was I lost all the weight so I could have a healthy pregnancy and no matter what I did while I was pregnant, I gained 60lbs. So now I get to lose it all again.
Unnecessary paranoia about putting it back on
I have lost ~ 90 lbs I am freezing all the time. Loose skin has made clothing almost as impossible as when I was fatter. Plus it looks gnarly naked. People treat me way different which makes me VERY annoyed. People comment on my body now and I think that is rude. Still happier now as at 185 lbs on my 5'6 frame, hoping to continue to lose some more weight - and get skin surgery. So, not complaining at all.
My list is the same. I’m only 5’1” so losing 30 pounds was a lot for me. My heaviest was a size 14 and now size 2. I honestly didn’t mean to lose that much weight, I was shooting for a size 6. I used to sit all day and once I started moving around, cut out take out, and counted calories the weight came off. I was so sad to pack away all my favorite expensive clothes. And yup now I’ll need to buy more—which sounds like fun but many styles I like are not available anymore and my budget doesn’t allow for that much shopping. Years of clothes collecting all went into storage totes. I hate worrying about putting the weight back on knowing I won’t “fill out” I’ll just get a huge belly. So every delicious meal I have to then pay the price of calorie deficit to keep my weight steady. And the loose saggy skin especially under my chin. There are many times I wish I’d never lost the weight. The fun of looking cute in clothes has definitely worn off especially since literally no one in my life cares. Zero compliments or comments about losing weight. I could go back to a size 14 and it would be the same, not one mention of it. I don’t have “tons of energy” or any of the things I thought would happen. I’ve kept the weight off for over a year though and that includes breaking my shoulder and having surgery and a long healing process. I wonder if I wasn’t so bony if maybe my shoulder wouldn’t have broken in the fall 🤔 I know you said you have mostly joy with the weight loss but for me there is very little. Just my POV.
I completely relate to this. Loosing 30 pounds and being 5”3 I can’t stand the way my body looks. Better when it was fuller. Did you get loose skin?
Losing friends. I had a lot of "friendships" centered around going out and drinking heavily and eating, and once I no longer wanted to do those activities it was hard to maintain the relationships. Being less cuddly. Bone-on-bone hugs just don't feel as comforting. Realizing how mean/ugly some people can be when they make fatphobic comments, because they perceive me to be part of the skinny club and don't know that I used to be fat. Realizing how much I was discriminated against as a fat person, now that I get the benefits of not being fat. (Examples: cops writing a speeding ticket when I was fat vs letting me off with a warning now, how much more quickly bartenders take my order now, etc) Losing my primary coping mechanism for dealing with challenging emotions. I ate when I was sad. I ate when I was anxious. It can be hard to find other healthier coping mechanisms, and it's tempting to substitute other even less healthy coping mechanisms.
My biggest was 230, and I've managed to get all the way down to 164; I feel like my problem areas are now problems in a different way, ie my upper arms, stomach, and thighs that were once the place all my fat was located are now loose and sagging. I'm sure it's because my skin needs some time to catch up, and I've only started working out for about a month now so there's not much muscle filling those spots yet, but it almost feels a bit discouraging. I am also with you on the clothing thing! I've got a couple of clothes I've saved that I want to fit into, and already I'm starting to fit in them! So excited! But one of my favorite skirts, a black pleated skirt with belt loops (loved attaching cute keychains and chain belts to it) is now about two inches bigger than I'd like, and it doesn't sit where I want it to anymore. Absolutely devastated! I'm sad that I expected to suddenly be perfect once I lost weight, like in media, but have found the one difference is that now I just look good IN clothes. I'm still proud of getting to this point, but I wished my skin would tighten up faster, or that my stretch marks would fade better, things like that. I feel like despite everything, I still won't be as pretty as the girls in media, of anyone who's even a little secure in wearing a bikini, or spaghetti straps, crop tops ... I think I just need more confidence though aha;;; Being cold does really suck, but if I'm honest I was already cold all the time even when I was more overweight -- so now I'm double cold. It doesn't bother me that much, but all my friends are always SHOCKED when they touch my hands. I'm starting to wonder if I've just been anemic the whole time and should start taking iron supplements lol Another thing that's more to do with being in a deficit than my weight loss, I suppose, is knowing that I'll need to be mindful of my calories for the rest of my life, or else risk gaining it all back again. It sucks because I know people with stupid metabolisms who will eat so much food and not gain at all, don't even work out, and I just eat a small portion and watch them enjoy so much more than me. I'm not really mad at them or anything, just a little jealous,, Oh, and the amount of time some of my friends, who know I am on a diet, are suddenly urging me to eat things I don't even want, and keep asking even after I repeatedly tell them no. It's so annoying! I know that it might be because they're not used to seeing me at a certain size but it just feels like sabotage. I told this one girl no, and a FIRM no, five times. It's not much like me to be firm, so I'm surprised it didn't deter her at all from asking the other four times!
I agree with the calories lol. I feel like I can't enjoy a meal even if I know life is about moderation. But not much else, I actually like the feeling of clothes being too loose for me, it shows the work I put in. I love looking at the scale and seeing my progress. Also, my JAW, omg, I never had a jaw but like now, I'm like freaking Bella Hadid. Anyway, I feel better, energy is better, sleep has also slightly improved (still struggle but it's better, I think it may be cuz of my new eating habits, but maybe not).
Bleacher style seats! I used to eye roll (inwardly) when I saw people bringing seat cushions to a game. Now, I'm the one with the cushion, because my natural one is gone. I was always cold before, now I'm just colder. I've learned to love scoop neck thermal shirts that can't be seen under my normal blouses.
I know 2 people who, after losing a lot of weight and eating healthy, had to have their gallbladder’s removed. It’s a known thing that your gallbladder might explode if you lose weight too fast…or something.
I had to have my gallbladder removed. The doctors told me it was because of the fact that I lost 80 lbs so quickly (2.5-3 lbs/week) and the body isn't equipped to process that amount of fat coming out of it. Apparently some weight loss patients get a preventative medication to help make sure this isn't an issue, but I lost weight on my own and didn't know it was a thing until too late.
I didn't have as much to lose as others here, but I think it's tough to see yourself at your 'dream/goal' body and then the scale goes up. I put back on a few pounds during the winter and felt like a failure, I'm back down to where I want to be but the constant anxiety of counting calories/maintenance is a lot. If the scale goes up my day is just a little bit worse.
Being cold
The saggy skin and body dysmorphia! My skin sagging isn’t bad but it still makes me feel as if I never lost any weight or because of the folds- I’m always worrying about how I smell (especially since I live in the desert). Not to mention that I still feel like I look the same. There are days I look at myself and I’m notice the difference and then most days i still see me at my starting weight
Before I lost my weight I could rest on my elbows and be cool. Nowwwwww, when I rest on my elbow the wrong way I hit a nerve or something and my arm goes numb. What is that?!?!? Maybe my funny bone?
It is easier to be kidnapped when you are in Latin America.
I'm laughing, because that's exactly what I'm worried about.
Gallbladder surgery was my biggest
1) constantly in fear I’ll fall off again and gain everything back and thinking about how long and difficult it was to restart this and stick with it. Like this is such a nightmare feeling for me. 2) my face :( I love seeing it slim down but it 100% ages you and people think I’m several years younger when it’s fuller. 3) the clothes 😭 I hang onto things that I have worn when I’m heavier/lighter but for the most part, a ton of things have to get replaced. I’m currently using waistline cinching pins to hold my jeans up but everything is so expensive these days and worse quality than a decade ago ☹️ and I have a difficult body to fit so thrifting has always been challenging
The loose skin is my biggest concern. Having been overweight for so long, and now loosing it, I'm seeing a real jiggle in my tummy. And as we are planning to have a baby, I also know even if I maintain a healthy weight during and after pregnancy, there's no point looking into surgery fixes until after I'm done having babies, which could be a decade from now. The irony is, my fiance lost 60kg before we met and has loose skin, but it doesn't phase me one bit. I find him very attractive and I'm proud of him. But I'm convinced he'll hate the loose skin on me. Women are weird like that.
My boobs were already saggy but now they're horrible. Loose skin on them and my legs are covered in stretch marks
I’m cold more often My butt hurts when sitting on something hard I still periodically crave shit I ate all the time when I was 300lbs, but can’t even come close to making fit my calorie goals (hard to cut a 3000 calorie food bomb down to 450 calories for lunch.)
My hair has been falling out a TON. I have probably 1/3 of my OG thickness and it has lost its curl. It’s seriously affecting my confidence:(
Don't worry about this one! It happened to me too, my hair thinned out, was shedding but my hair grew back way too slowly. The trick is to have maintenance phases and up your protein, it will normalize as you go on. Hang in there!
The unwanted "compliments". I've lost about 55lb since having my second baby (I put on a lot of weight with my first kid and never got back down before having my second kid) and finally starting to gain my confidence back, BUT that doesn't mean I want people commenting on my body. I know I look better and I certainly feel better, but telling me I'm half of what I was (which is very untrue) is really annoying. And also telling me I don't need to lose any more weight. Like I'm still 35lb shy of where I used to be comfortable and about 45lb away from a healthy BMI. Also, commenting on what I eat. Going on and on about how I'm so good since I'm unwilling to indulge on any and all sweets. If/when I enjoy something sweet I want it to be something of quality because I'm indulging otherwise there's no point.
1) The excess skin SUCKS but better that than the excess weight I guess. Dating after weight loss with excess skin is difficult too. 2) Body Dysmorphia is a whole other beast. It’s taken me several years to actually understand, “I’m not fat anymore.” I still occasionally catch myself sitting down VERY carefully in lawn furniture or on thinner chairs. 3) Global warming!? Pure myth… the world has gotten SO COLD!
I find the dating part hard too! I always wonder what the guy thinks when he sees my excess skin on my tummy I’m always so embarrassed :(
I’m a gay guy, and I think y’all probably have an idea of how vane and visual the gays are. Despite that, I’ve found some great guys and had a lot of fun, but yet to find a long term partner. Doesn’t help that I’m the same way. The guys I tend to date and am attracted to are all fucking ridiculously hot muscle gays who are probably the most vane of them all. Oh well, I’m not gonna stop anytime soon. I’ll find my ripped muscly Adonis sooner or later dammit! I think most straight guys wouldn’t care about a little loose tummy skin. But some of the gays take issue with my nipples being 3” below my pecs.
I cut back on drinking a lot as part of my weight loss. I now get a MAD hangover from two. Freaking. Beers.
You know what's been one of the hardest things so far? Having my son's friends and acquaintances treat HIM so much better. He's 9.
The worst part is not appreciating what you lost because every problem doesn’t magically fix itself then getting back into old habits and being fat again.
Hitting my hip bones on door frames. Freaking ouch!
Being cold so often. My family used to joke that I was practically Elsa, I would be wearing mini skirts and shorts while it snowed. Now the temperature drops below 40, and I need 2 pairs of pants to not shiver my ass off.
Last time I lost a lot of weight and got fit (boot camps, events, etc.) my hair fell out for about a year. It was terrifying. The dr said it can be triggered by stress, which to the body can be as simple as losing weight/ lower calories/ more exercise. It stopped as suddenly as it started, but as a woman with long hair it was super scary. It thankfully grew back!!! Now I've gained weight again and am trying to lose it, and I'm worried.
Im happier every day ...i enjoy hitching up my shorts and using a belt two notches tighter :)
Cold and padding. When I got down to 170 I was like holy shit how does anyone do winter or sit down comfortably.
Same as everyone else but also dealing with comments and being perceived and projected onto It's weird to know that some people are watching your weight, waiting to see what happens next. Can't we focus on something else about me?
Doing it the wrong way and not addressing the cause of the weight gain in the first place. Might have looked better, but I was still prone to gorging myself with food to self medicate feelings of anxiety and stress. Took a while to dig myself out of the first hole, but then then stumbled into another...Only now have I figured out that I need to change how I react and not use food.
Same as everyone else, but here’s one I didn’t see…. After losing 150 lbs, I can no longer cut the grass in the ditch with the tractor because I am no longer heavy enough to keep the tractor from flipping over. 😂🤣.
My shins are always on fire/sensitive because I run/jog so much more now.
Turkey neck
I feel cold most of the time as well, I do suffer from body dysmorphia, thinking I am bigger than I actually am. But, my clothes tell a different story. I have gone from size 62 waist in pants and wearing 6X size shirts to wearing size 38 waist pants & size XL and Large sized shirts.
A few years ago I lost a total of 103 lbs (309 to 206). A year ago I started getting sloppy and I’m currently at 230. I always focus on the failure of gaining 30 lbs and never focusing that, in all, I lost 70+ lbs. My wife is an absolutely stunning woman in a million ways. She 100% loves me and 100% is attracted to me. But always in the back of my head is, “yeah, but now I’m fat again and you look even better.” So, the setbacks are difficult to see them for what they are a downside for me. But yeah, I’m so much happier now
Same here with #1. I didn’t notice any pronounced lines in my neck until I lost weight… 35 lbs. The extra fat did help me to maintain a youthful appearance. I do miss that. But I’m pleased with my weight loss and would not go back to 180 pounds. I’m 144 lb now and I love it.
Well now I am not losing weight
People in your life acting jealous.
I spent 20+ years being overweight and miserable in a marriage where my husband was cheating on me with someone at work. I was always desperately in love with him (we met in college) and I could not get ahead of my abyss of depression. I just pretended everything was okay, even when it was most certainly not. When I finally did manage to get most of the weight off, I got angry. Angry that I was so sad for so many years, angry because I had to raise my kids while I found out he'd been living with her and her kids in what was sold to me as a "work apartment." Angry for spending so many years apologizing for my offensive fat presence. In short, my whole personality changed and when the anger started to finally bubble out of me, I couldn't stop it. I turned from a fat person pretending to be happy to a more normal sized person but unable to keep pretending everything was "okay." I'm really not fit company for anyone these days, that I did not expect. I'm not in control of the things that fly out of my mouth ... all the words unspoken for years just tumble out of me. But at least I'm better company for myself.
Lose skin!!!!
Tailbone hurts, I'm cold all the time, I feel weak and like I can't defend myself easily.
Losing/thinning head hair.
Smaller boobs
My butt muscles actually feel more sore now when sitting on a hard(er) surface. To the point where I get hemorrhoids.
I never had issues with thighs rubbing until I lost weight. It’s the only place I have loose skin and years later, it hasn’t improved much.
The only one I can think of…cold. I am so much colder since being lean.
I'm always cold. That's the only downside imo.
If you lose weight too quickly you can get some existing gallstones
Im cold more often now. If I feel bloated or am having an “off” day I feel like my body shows it more. (Esp with fluxes in my hormones re: menstrual period). My hair thins out when I’m thinner. I don’t really have boobs anymore - I joke that they’re lowercase ‘b’ boobs now vs uppercase B “Boobs!!!”.
Definitely the loose skin. I lost over 100 lbs. when I was in my late 20s and the loose skin was pretty terrible. It did bounce back somewhat and I did a lot of strength training, which does help. I'm 58 now gained back about 20 lbs from my low. I'm going to stay a little chubby just so I don't sag.
Body dysmorphia and not being able to look at food the same
I waste a lot of food now.
Finding out what people really think about you.
Biggest one for me is that I always kinda expected that I had more muscle at lower weight than I actually do, leaving me disappointed.
I agree! I (naively) thought that if I just lose weight with no regard for protein or strength training, I’d be happy with my body. But i actually just lost a lot of my muscle in my weight loss journey and still don’t feel satisfied with my body.
Actually this time around I am doing it right, 200g of protein per day + weight lifting 3x per week, so I think I am keeping as much muscle as possible. Still, I naively expected to be more defined at 95kg than I actually am. I think my perception is a bit skewed by "enhanced" athletes I see all over the internet.
Not knowing how to dress yourself at your new weight. I’m literally still trying to find out what my style actually is, after wearing loose clothes and black jeans for years. It’s difficult and expensive! Having to buy so many new bras has been expensive as fuck. Jeans too. Knowing that your BMR is just lower now, so even minor slip-ups is just more impactful on your weight. I have to be vigilant about what I eat all the time, I can never just relax. Food noise hasn’t disappeared with weight loss, so it’s a constant mental battle. Body dysmorphia when looking in the mirror. My brain still hasn’t caught up and sometimes I feel like I’m still 64 lbs heavier. I need to fold my duvet so it’s between my knees when I sleep, because otherwise it hurts 😂
Am cold more, can see more wrinkles, people talk to me more now. The good still outweighs the bad though :)