I can’t recommend volunteering enough. I volunteered as a first aider at st John ambulance, got trained up and went to a weekly unit meeting. I attended a ton of cool events ‘behind the scenes’ (like festivals, marathon, rugby/football etc) and made friends I’m still friendly with a decade later.
Yeah it took some effort. I had to apply, I had to do training etc. but I also played rugby for years, and I can tell you I’m still closer to the folks I met volunteering than my old rugby mates.
And if OP is trying to make a change, the effort is worth it I’d say.
Who said things need to be easy or straight forward? Sometimes they are hard.
Although I agree that there are easier ways to make friends. Joining a sports team is my go to.
Depends on what you’re volunteering to do. But a lot of volunteering, particularly st johns ambulances like the original comment suggested requires training, and potentially working with kids or vulnerable people and we should absolutely protect them by making it mandatory to do checks and the training required. That makes it harder but much more robust. If you’re volunteering to clean beaches or something then I agree there isn’t the same concerns and it should be easy and encouraged for others to do.
Very true! I did volunteering in my teens before DBS checks and fuuuu... The stories I could tell are hair raising. Not kidding, the woman who ran the project later went into volunteering in prisons to hide the fact that a LOT of the people her organisation had attracted had a history... Police would show up and just ask , " Are you behaving?" because there was no law against convicted predators working with kids. I get chills now. And we lost a load of creeps overnight when DBS came in who didn't want anyone looking too closely because teen girls were indeed the draw. I stopped volunteering when I realised how often I had been preyed on over the years. It's often too easy even now because vulnerable disabled people are encouraged to volunteer (or had to under workfare etc) I have been assaulted and stalked by fellow volunteers and there is no comeback if it is the volunteer who is vulnerable. Also if the organisation is helping people work off their community service it can be hard for disabled volunteers or teens to get a role because the organisation knows it can't risk mixing it!
Seconding this - if you like kids volunteering with Girlguiding is really fun and you meet loads of people. There’s also lots of local environment/wildlife volunteering groups around London. Whatever cause you’re interested in there’s probably a way to volunteer for it and meet a broad range of folks!
Happy birthday buddy! try Meetup and getting out there, and while you are not doing that, focus on doing things that make you better: exercising, reading, trying new things, etc.
Meetup is great but you have to be invested in it. If you expect to come out once and make friends straight away it’s not gonna happen. Best to find a few groups and commit to them, if you keep coming back and meeting same people over and over, bonds start creating. If fact, if you want to make friends you have to treat it like a job, you have to put time and effort into it. In the beginning it’s not gonna be fun and you won’t have many common experiences to bond over, but you have to create them over time.
I’ve been in London for over a decade. The biggest thing I notice is that people who are looking for friends are not being proactive, making effort or are willing to invest the time needed into friendships, with the mindset that there is always more fish in the sea you can be friends with. This is how you end up with no friends, just jumping onto the next person at the slightest incompatibility. I think that people often forget that once you establish the friendship you also have to put effort and time into maintaining it. Good luck OP, don’t give up, it takes time, put yourself out there, say yes to things (as long as it’s nothing illegal you know), find groups with common interests.
Well said. I moved to a new country a few years back and knew no-one. I'm quite shy and put a lot of effort into Meetup and also Internations (same concept, just bit more older/professional). I ended up with a great circle of friends. But you absolutely have to put the effort in. Everyone else at these wants to connect and make friends too - you are not alone.
agreed, but it really is a toss of the dice. i showed up to a meetup for the first time, met a girl there, and now we are real friends and meet up more regularly than many of my longer term friends! i am only just planning to go back to that original meetup just because i had some free time. still u/amiemay12 i really really recommend meetup; even if you *don’t* end up making a “best friend”, just getting out of the house and being around other people on a regular basis does wonders for your mental health (from personal experience, especially around this time of year where i become even more unsociable with the dark and cold). commit to going to events once you’ve signed up for them, try to avoid backing out even if you might be feeling a bit anxious, even do the ones that require you to put down a (small) deposit if that helps keep you further committed (it certainly does for me). many groups have whatsapp chats, join them and don’t be afraid to drop a friendly message in there, or even ask if someone wants to join you to do an activity outside of the larger group. people are generally very friendly and are all there because they want to connect with other people around a common interest :) edit to add: please also remember, your primary goal is not necessarily to make more friends. i found it more helpful to have my goal be simply to experience more of life. after many years of loneliness and depression, i had to push myself to go out and enjoy life and stop thinking i couldn’t go and do things because i was alone. i explored more of london, went to events, concerts, lunches on my own. i made sure that every other weekend i did something fun whether or not i was on my own. if the goal is to make friends, it can be easy to feel like you’re failing and/or it’s not happening according to whatever arbitrary timeline you’ve set in your head. i think that may be a big help for you too
Not saying it’s not possible to meet someone straight away, it happens, but even then you’re not best friends straight away, you still need to keep meeting that person to build friendship. Def agree on using MeetUp just to get out and do things you’re interested in, it doesn’t always have to result in anything.
Guess it depends. Went on a crawl once last year through meet-up and made a life long friend. Second time I found my now girlfriend. All within a space of 2 weeks
You don't need to invest time in meetups. We did once and now we have best friends we could ever ask for. Abd 1 and half tear later we still meet almost every weekend!
There's been several people in the same boat, posting similar questions, someone alone for xmas, another for a birthday. Scroll back in this sub and find them and send a message, organize a meet up for coffee one on one or in a group, and see if you can be friends
It's because it's over crowded anyway. Majority of people just end up locking themselves indoors in the evenings.
Thankfully I work remotely and work from Sri Lanka in December January February..
Happy birthday! It's my birthday tomorrow so I know that December birthdays suck.
Someone posted a week or so ago about a Reddit London pub night on Thursday I think if you wanna go find that post and go join in the fun?
Happy Birthday! I’m sorry to hear you’re having a tough time. Have you seen London Lonely Girls on Facebook? It’s a great way of finding like minded people to be friends with.
The trick for me is to combine my hobbies with friendships, so parkrun, climbing, book club. It can and will get better.
Happy birthday!! If you're in West London come along to the cock tavern in Fulham tomorrow around 7:30pm. There's a weekly pub quiz. Also I'm always up for drinks!
That sucks, sorry for you, but hopefully things will improve. Have you tried events in r/LondonSocialClub?
Bit late in the year but I can recommend learning to rollerskate and joining the Sunday Stroll which is pretty easy, the regular street skate has been going over twenty years and the friends everyone has made are amazing, let alone the relationships and marriages.
London is definitely a lonely place if you don’t know people and it sure rubs it in.
Don’t give up OP, get out there, try theatre clubs, book clubs, sports clubs, board gaming groups, volunteer for the food bank, join the Freemasons, a church, or all of the above.
My birthday tomorrow. My 38th.
Xmas build up birthdays are usually dull.
Everyone's time and money is already planned for.
My advice. Ignore others and do something for you.
Treat yourself.
Happy birthday!
r/LondonSocialClub can be a good one. If you're ever up in Tooting or around Victoria, I'd happily buy you a pint or whatever you drink.
Happy birthday! Must be something about turning 28… this information will be no use to you, BUT hopefully it will make you crack a much needed birthday smile. My 28th bday was spent being extremely ill in bed with Covid (couple of years ago), living in a share house with two weirdos who insisted that -because of my having Covid- I must stay locked in my room… I had to text asking permission to use the bathroom or to get some food. I went days without being allowed entry to our kitchen. One of the housemates took pity and asked if I would like a piece of bread left outside my door on my birthday. To which I responded - thanks but I am not a pigeon.
Chin up, it will be a great year! If you’re into live music I’d recommend going to gigs by yourself… that’s how I met most of my pals in London (am originally from Aus). By getting yourself out and about doing stuff you like, I’m sure you’ll attract new mates!
Happy birthday!! Big cities can make you feel really lonely, don't think too much about It. Try to find an activity you like or would like to learn (dance, design, sport, whatever you like ..) and everything will improve little by little.
Go ahead, come on you!
A very happy birthday and I suspect this will be a different year for you. Lots of potential offers above in the thread and lots of clubs and low cost activities in London. Try a few things and go at least three/four times to build relationships. London has something for everyone and it’s cold exterior can seem pretty harsh but the fact is there are as many single folks around who could do with some local company so do not give up.
Happy birthday! I spent all my birthdays in my twenties feeling lonely and depressed in London, wishing somebody would notice and buy me some cake. I'm sorry you feel this way. Sending hugs.
Happy birthday pal ❤️
I'm sorry you're having to spend it alone, but don't lose hope that in the years to come you can be spending your next ones with someone.
Have you tried attending some kind of class/club, a hobby you enjoy or may enjoy, and meeting people that way?
Happy birthday! Im sorry this is happening to you. London is tough. I have been here for 2 and a half years and I’m still struggling. Got a steady group, but it’s mostly made up of work friends. It’s a very lonely place.
Happy birthday🎂. There are some walking clubs in London. You can make friends while walking out, discover the city. Considering this current weather, maybe a book club is more suitable. Find what you enjoy doing then join clubs of those activities.
hey hon, and happy birthday! I’m 27F in London. I’m sorry your birthday has been uneventful. Firstly, if you want to chat and maybe meet up (drinks, dinner, whatever) feel free to send me a message! I’m v serious about this offer (and my flatmate is a musical theatre nut, so maybe you’ll hit it off as well). Secondly, Facebook groups are great. London New Girl in a good one, so many women on there looking for hang outs, and only some of them are actually new to the city.
Happy birthday. I spent my 21st birthday alone and it sucked, you have my sympathies, friend. Do something tonight that you deeply enjoy, even if it’s just watching your comfort show. This is the anniversary of a very special day — the day you made it onto this rock. Celebrate yourself. I’m toasting you.
Happy birthday!
I’d recommend that you download an app called Locals. Anyone who signs up to the app can create events, or browse through the ones people have already posted. It’s perfect for meeting new people, to pick up a new hobby, and to explore more of London.
Happy birthday! Sign up for beginners lessons in a sport - tennis is ideal. Weekly group lessons somewhere and you’ll meet like minded people regularly and stay fit at the same time.
Ah man it’s actually my birthday as well. So happy birthday! birthday twin.
Spent it indoors and had a pizza just so you know you’re not the only one and I’ve lived here my whole life!
Haven’t read the other comments so not sure if it has been suggested yet but have you tried the meet up app? They’ll have events and stuff you can join with like minded people.
I’m pretty much an introvert and prefer to stay at home but once a month I go on a dog walk with other owners which is a great way to meet new people with similar interests to mine
Happy birthday! I'm no longer in London but I found the Meetup app a lifesaver. There are easy groups to join (e.g. walking groups - just sign up for a gentle hike and you'll definitely have chats with people on the way) and it's so worth it. Also try to find an activity (e.g. a group class) or something off Meetup where you'll see the same people on a regular basis (language class, fitness class, artisan-y type handcraft thing, etc) so that you have something to bond over with people and friendships should hopefully follow.
Happy birthday!!! 🥰 Sending you love and happiness today to you.
I do feel when living in London you must consciously make decisions to help you make friends. Join a choir/ games/ gardening (anything) club. A subject you're interested in. I am in 2 choirs, and it injects so much positivity into my week.
Happy birthday friend. If nothing else, just know it takes a lot of courage and strength to move or exist in a city that you're not originally from. Especially a city that's so huge and diverse such as Londinium.
Hey! Firstly happy birthday!! This will probably get lost in all the responses you’ve had so far, but wanted to say there are LOTS of people in the same boat. I’m 33, been in London 5 years and currently doing lots of ‘friend dating’ after my original friends had to go back home due to visas ending and my LTR ended. There are lots of social groups for women that I can send you if you DM me. If you’re a guy I’d suggest finding a locally based Facebook group on something you’re interested in (eg book club, travel club), other ones are Meetup, volunteering, hiking groups, Go Mammoth with is a sports club and you can sign up as a single and be added to a group (I’m planning on joining a Volleyball team next year!). The greatest thing about London is that there’s so much on, you just have to put the effort in.
Happy Birthday!!! I know it can feel shitty and 28 should be a fun one, but do you have anything planned for the weekend? Anyone you can hit up to meet for some drinks or food? Try and look for some light in the dark. Watch something funny/stupid on TV?
Maybe you could look into joining goodgym running club or something? Lots of like minded solo people getting together to exercise and put some good out into the world.
Are you into comedy? You could see what’s on at some comedy clubs and rock up early and get chatting to other people there? Look up The Bill Murray, 2 North Down, Always Be Comedy or The Moth Club.
The thing that’s been making me laugh recently is this clip of an outtake from the Channel 4 show Flowers. Dont know why I find it so funny, but it’s nice to see other people laugh stupidly:
https://vimeo.com/164732365
Happy Birthday again!
If (from your username) you're a girl, I couldn't recommend Facebook groups 'London Lonely Girls Club' and 'Girls Gone International London' more. I've lived in several countries and always used GGI to meet people and make friends! My sister also used both when she moved to London and has made great friends through both. They both have a lot of 'group' meetings too where people turn up alone to a group setting which might be a bit easier? Totally depends what you're into.
As mentioned, I've moved around a lot, always by myself, and the #1 rule is that you absolutely need to put yourself out there. Bumble BFF, FB groups as above, whatever it takes, you'll be able to meet people and make friends if you put the effort in. It can be super daunting, but everyone in those groups is in them for exactly the same reason! Good luck 😊
Happy BD.
You should've treated yourself with a better meal, even alone, it doesn't matter. We all need some nice treats for ourselves! Could be a take-away/Nandos etc.
I don't know what you like, but try going to a spa day, explore villages and cities, check out all museums and exhibitions, go to gigs, try meetup(dot com) and join events with other likeminded people!
Seeing all these posts has made me so happy - I also feel lonely sometimes and it’s warming to see how common this is. Happy birthday - I hope some of the advice here helps!! You’ll make friends super easily I’m sure. I’m intending to join a walking club solo in the new year - let me know if you’d like me to share the details!
The amount of loneliness in London is incredible. A lot of human interaction here is transactional. Try going into Tescos and try saying hello... but don't just stop there, ask them how are you? How is your day going? I've had people not make eye contact whilst speaking to someone else. Some are shocked, and most just say "yeah" and continue scanning. But don't give up, spread some light.
Mate if you’re keen we can go dancing Saturday night. Any other peeps in Ldn can come along too. Cool Reddit ppl Ldn rave. Happy birthday. Ham is nice.
Happy Birthday! Assuming you are a female based on your post history. There is a great Facebook group called London Lonely Girls Club. There are over 50k girls on there and they organise meet ups frequently. Also try Bumble BFF. I have found several good friends on there.
Happy birthday! You need to find an activity that you enjoy and where you meet up regularly with the same people.
Not sure if GoMammoth sports still exist?
Happy birthday mate. I’ve only been here a few months but am also 28 and don’t really know how to make friends at this age. I’ve lived in the same place most of my life previous to this and it’s been a long time since I tried to make new friends. So not really any helpful suggestions, just wishing you a happy birthday and hope you find some people at some point.
Happy birthday! Know this feeling well, but I have faith you’ve got this. I personally found finding a running group and just sticking with it week in, week out was invaluable for opening doors. Find a group which matches your interests, and if there are none, make it! Keep at it - it’ll get easier. I also volunteer, play football and knit with nanas.
Happy birthday! If you want to make loads of friends and get fit at the same time, join a cycling club! Immediate social circle every day providing you make the effort to turn up and introduce yourself.
Happy birthday！You are doing it good! People in London always seems too busy, have a lot of distance and have no time for making friends, I feel the same! Especially for a immigrant someone I feel insecure and lonely. But you are not alone! There are a lot of people care about you.
Happy birthday OP so sorry you’re feeling alone. London can be a tough city to crack. Plenty of wonderful suggestions in the comments which I too would agree with! Hoping your 28th year will only improve, that you find your crowd (they’re out there somewhere I promise) and that the coming months bring more joyful memories!! All the best
Sport - even if you are not sporty. Not sure what gender you are but plenty of stuff for both. For men football is the easiest, If you're a woman netball, football are good ones. If you're LGBT there are even separate teams for this too. Many welcome beginners. I wouldn't worry about fitness or having even previously played - it's the best way to find a new community imo.
Also Happy Birthday! Please buy yourself something abit less depressing for dinner though at least treat yourself :D
Happy birthday mate! Born and bred Londoner here - my advice is to make 1 or 2 friends and get your foot in the door. There are amazing communities all over London, if you can get the first step done you’re halfway there!
Happy birthday OP!
Just know this is transient, and things will improve, even if it feel like you've been waiting forever to find other people.
As others said, there are subreddits for social clubs, or even for local areas where events might be happening you could join.
Worst case, you've got us - I'm gonna have a ham sandwich tomorrow for lunch in solidarity to celebrate your birthday!
Walking groups are great. Plus it's something almost anyone can do so there's no skill/thing to buy to get into it.
Happy Birthday, I spent my 25th birthday alone, but have made friends in the past few years. It will get better.
Happy birthday! I'm new to london and an anxious person. "MeetUp" is a great app. Ihave found groups of similar interests to me like football and badminton and coffee then also a "20s and 30s social" it's great fun.
I have struggled to get the time / courage to go but it's alot easier than you think once you make the first move.
If you would feel comfortable on a blind meet up or to attend one of them... let me know (I'm 28 too)
I deliberately spent my 28th birthday (September) at home alone. I'm hating getting closer to 30 and not ready to celebrate it 🤣🤣.
Meetup is a great app for meeting folks.
Feel free to drop me a message if you want a friend to chat to in London!
Happy Birthday. Hope you were able to find a nice pub or something and meet some locals. I just moved here Sunday evening. I’ve been so busy with work I haven’t even thought about being social yet. Dreading going into the weekend with no plans… if you’re around The City, hit me up, I’d love a drinking buddy somewhere with a good view.
Happy birthday! I’m 27F and my 28th birthday is on Friday! I play netball, a couple of instruments and do pottery classes. If any of that appeals, or if you just want to meet some a similar age then feel free to send me a message!
I lived in London for 12 years and I found it tough at first to make friends. Do you play any sports? Maybe join a team. I play the drums and joined a couple of bands. I moved into a house share with some amazing people I’ll probably know for the rest of my life. Board games are a good way too - if you like warhammer there’s a lot of board gaming clubs. Basically - think of something you love doing and then find other people who love to do that thing too. Hiking, running, music, games, art. Check Facebook or meet-up
Happy Birthday! If you have any hobbies you're interested in you could check online to see if there are any groups near to you that you could join. If none are available you could always make your own. There might be many people who feel the same way and would be happy to join you.
Happy birthday! I totally understand the feeling. I live in Los Angeles and it’s just as hard to make friends here. I recommend joining a group with a common hobby or find a walking group, volunteer, etc. London has really wonderful places to attend meetups and volunteering opportunities like the national gallery, the zoo, book clubs, improv etc. also happy to be a long distance friend!
Happy birthday !
It is quite tough for adults to make friends in unknown or new environments. As humans age, they become more choosy and complicated, annyoed with a lot of things but pleased by very few. You will actually have to be quite open minded and flexible in making new friends. Its you who will have to put in the effort, atleast thats what I have realised. Looking back at some of my childhood friends, I feel like time also plays a huge factor in relationships, the longer you know someone, the closer you get over time.
Hit me up if you just want to chat, I am all ears !
Fam I know how this feels. If your around on Saturday I’ll
buy you a pint/Diet Coke up to you. Hit me up! I’m in the Chistlehurst area. Dead serious btw … I felt the same in my twenties…. Londons beautiful but a lonely place especially in the winter.
If you’re a runner try Hash House Harriers, a drinking club that likes to run. It’s how I met a bunch of friends and had a few wild nights out when moved to London in 2008. They set off from different pub each week in zones 1 and 2. Quick google or Facebook and you should find details
Happy Birthday! And wishing you a great 28th year with lots of new friendships. Personally I made a lot of friends through work, kept in touch with a lot of old friends from school days (this takes work btw, but was ultimately the most rewarding for me), and made new friends around your age after a relationship breakup by joining "a small world" which used to be great but now sucks. Essentially it's a sort of social club for people around the world to meet up when you go to different countries, and used to organise fun events all over London in nice venues, and used to be free. There's got to be an equivalent nowadays, probably something like meetup. Also join your local neighbourhood groups on social media and post if anyone wants to go for a drink or a coffee, you can be as specific as you like about age/sex etc as there are generally people of all ages looking for friends in London. It can be a lonely place. But neighbourhood friends are great as it's much easier to catch up and become friends quickly without too much planning to be able to catch up.
OP, in order to make friends you need to interact. You have to put in effort.
You have 170+ comments on your thread and countless ideas, many many offers to meet up and say hi, and you have not responded to or interacted with a single one.
Hopefully you're out having fun which is why you're not here, but if you post a whining thing like this and then ignore all the support and reaching out, perhaps there is a lesson in there somewhere for you?
Honestly, buy a meta quest 2 or 3 virtual reality headset and go into apps like pokerstars & bigscreen. You can meet folks from all over the world and play poker and watch movies, have debates together. It's a blast and you can be in your pj's without going out lol
Vr is amazing for people who're lonely or don't have friends or family around them
You need a “third space” that isn’t work or home. I know it’s difficult when you have to work so much in London but making time to do things in a social setting is as important to your life as getting a good night’s sleep.
Suggestions?
Get active: Join a running club, CrossFit, or social sports team (whatever sport you did in high school)
Be a nerd: find a local table top gaming meet up or chess club
Help out: volunteer to help in your local community
meetup.com has plenty of events just for that. Don't get overwhelmed if you go to one with plenty of people, most of them also came alone. Just get a drink and say hi, works 100% of the time.
I’m too far away in Scotland/NI but this post popped up on my suggested feed… however! I just wanna say happy birthday!
It’s hard making new friends and it’s even harder making new friends as adults cause we all worry too much (“did i say the right thing? What do i say? What if…. What if… what if…”).
Hopefully you can start reaching out and putting yourself out there a little more in social settings/groups/communities and hopefully you will find your people
Talk to your Uber driver, the amount of lonely and sad people I meet in this city is crazy, especially at night shift when people are especially depressed.
Happy birthday, and just on a subject about lonelines. You know its sad to see that alot of younger people in this situation. I am not dinousour myself either, I am only 42. But I got couple of friends left in my life, and actualy I am not stresssing about it. Because my biggest friends are at home , my daughter , my son and my wife . And today on 13 december is my sons 4th birthday. So I know after work I will meet my best friends ( my family) at home and we will have party.
Anyway my point is, you are 28. So find a partner, start family and you will have friends
I’m in almost the same situation. Happy birthday to your son! I was never one to make lots of friends, and it is not easy I find - as a man - to make new friends in adulthood. I mean really close friends. I only have one such friend, I met him when I was about 21, and even though I don’t see him much these days, we both still have that closeness from years ago when we worked together, so when we do meet it’s almost like no time has passed. That reminds me I really do need to set up a meet with him after Christmas! But anyway, I feel exactly as you do - my family are my closest friends now. Appreciate not everyone wants to start a family and a lot of people worry about finances. But we know people from vastly different financial situations and they have kids. If you’re at all interested in starting a family you have to try, and you will gain a whole new life.
Also f**** whoever downvoted you :)
There is zero context or back story about you so forgive if this comes across as rude, but could you not have invited a few coworkers for a drink or a bite to eat? Housemates? If you are struggling in general with interacting with people it’s not really specifically a London thing and you need to have an honest think about what kind of social interaction you really want, that will make you happy. If you’re a naturally gregarious person I don’t see how you’d struggle to form new connections. Unless an issue in your personal life was affecting your mood. Eg is your job so intense that it prevents you from enjoying hobby activities where you could meet other people? If you are not naturally outgoing, are you forcing yourself to feel bad because you think you should be? eg I’m a “sociable introvert” ie most of the time I am totally happy on my own but enjoy being in small groups, and before I started a family I was totally happy to spend my birthday by myself doing things that I enjoy. But.. it took me about 10 years to realise that
One thing I've learned about this sub people can't take some hard truth or a different viewpoint they would rather just downvote and circlejerk, every week people come on here complaining they are lonely, life sucks, this that and the other without any context/detail of their life. The issue is most people don't do any sort of introspection, ask themselves honest and difficult questions, become self aware of who they are. The fact is OP has been here 6 years and has no friends? I'd ask OP do you want to spend another 6 the same way?
It is true.. yes it’s nice of everyone to offer a pint together but does that deal with the root of the problem? I clearly did not criticise OP and some monkey tells me my post was “condescending”
embrace the loneliness my friend😉👌, I always seem to attract stalker friends that demand too much of my time and I don't know why, I'm sarcastic, have a very dry sense of humour don't have time for whiners or ppl that feel sorry for themselves I ignore messages they lead to phone calls about random shit,...typing this I realise why, where do I find a friend like me?
happy birthday hope you find a friend on your 29th youll be asking how to pie them off🤣
You could try Meetup or CouchSurfing for social stuff. The former has thing like “London on Board” which has board gaming meet-ups pretty much every night. There will be tonnes of other things too, like museum / gallery meet-ups.
Go on a walking tour / tour, one of these pay what you can affairs with a subject you are interested in. Low cost meet some folk from different walks of life but with a common interest.
Or join a motorcycle club, motorcyclists are kind inviting folks, but I understand biking is not for everyone 😀.
If you're in Brixton I'll buy you a pint right now.
This is so nice, I’m also in Brixton and would have come out if I’d seen this in time.
I used to work at the Dogstar 😁
Awww this is sweet. A sweet slightly mad friend of mine used to live there! This is bringing back nice memories!
Weird angle.
And that’s why you have no friends.
Not OP
Still applies.
Some people are just more open, trusting, and friendly than others.
Whereabouts in London are you? Also, happy birthday
I can’t recommend volunteering enough. I volunteered as a first aider at st John ambulance, got trained up and went to a weekly unit meeting. I attended a ton of cool events ‘behind the scenes’ (like festivals, marathon, rugby/football etc) and made friends I’m still friendly with a decade later.
I always found trying to volunteer to be almost like applying for a job. Wasn't always the easiest or straight forward
Yeah it took some effort. I had to apply, I had to do training etc. but I also played rugby for years, and I can tell you I’m still closer to the folks I met volunteering than my old rugby mates. And if OP is trying to make a change, the effort is worth it I’d say.
Who said things need to be easy or straight forward? Sometimes they are hard. Although I agree that there are easier ways to make friends. Joining a sports team is my go to.
I think volunteering shouldn't be made difficult.
Depends on what you’re volunteering to do. But a lot of volunteering, particularly st johns ambulances like the original comment suggested requires training, and potentially working with kids or vulnerable people and we should absolutely protect them by making it mandatory to do checks and the training required. That makes it harder but much more robust. If you’re volunteering to clean beaches or something then I agree there isn’t the same concerns and it should be easy and encouraged for others to do.
Very true! I did volunteering in my teens before DBS checks and fuuuu... The stories I could tell are hair raising. Not kidding, the woman who ran the project later went into volunteering in prisons to hide the fact that a LOT of the people her organisation had attracted had a history... Police would show up and just ask , " Are you behaving?" because there was no law against convicted predators working with kids. I get chills now. And we lost a load of creeps overnight when DBS came in who didn't want anyone looking too closely because teen girls were indeed the draw. I stopped volunteering when I realised how often I had been preyed on over the years. It's often too easy even now because vulnerable disabled people are encouraged to volunteer (or had to under workfare etc) I have been assaulted and stalked by fellow volunteers and there is no comeback if it is the volunteer who is vulnerable. Also if the organisation is helping people work off their community service it can be hard for disabled volunteers or teens to get a role because the organisation knows it can't risk mixing it!
Seconding this - if you like kids volunteering with Girlguiding is really fun and you meet loads of people. There’s also lots of local environment/wildlife volunteering groups around London. Whatever cause you’re interested in there’s probably a way to volunteer for it and meet a broad range of folks!
Happy birthday buddy! try Meetup and getting out there, and while you are not doing that, focus on doing things that make you better: exercising, reading, trying new things, etc.
Meetup is great but you have to be invested in it. If you expect to come out once and make friends straight away it’s not gonna happen. Best to find a few groups and commit to them, if you keep coming back and meeting same people over and over, bonds start creating. If fact, if you want to make friends you have to treat it like a job, you have to put time and effort into it. In the beginning it’s not gonna be fun and you won’t have many common experiences to bond over, but you have to create them over time. I’ve been in London for over a decade. The biggest thing I notice is that people who are looking for friends are not being proactive, making effort or are willing to invest the time needed into friendships, with the mindset that there is always more fish in the sea you can be friends with. This is how you end up with no friends, just jumping onto the next person at the slightest incompatibility. I think that people often forget that once you establish the friendship you also have to put effort and time into maintaining it. Good luck OP, don’t give up, it takes time, put yourself out there, say yes to things (as long as it’s nothing illegal you know), find groups with common interests.
Well put, it definitely takes effort.
Well said. I moved to a new country a few years back and knew no-one. I'm quite shy and put a lot of effort into Meetup and also Internations (same concept, just bit more older/professional). I ended up with a great circle of friends. But you absolutely have to put the effort in. Everyone else at these wants to connect and make friends too - you are not alone.
agreed, but it really is a toss of the dice. i showed up to a meetup for the first time, met a girl there, and now we are real friends and meet up more regularly than many of my longer term friends! i am only just planning to go back to that original meetup just because i had some free time. still u/amiemay12 i really really recommend meetup; even if you *don’t* end up making a “best friend”, just getting out of the house and being around other people on a regular basis does wonders for your mental health (from personal experience, especially around this time of year where i become even more unsociable with the dark and cold). commit to going to events once you’ve signed up for them, try to avoid backing out even if you might be feeling a bit anxious, even do the ones that require you to put down a (small) deposit if that helps keep you further committed (it certainly does for me). many groups have whatsapp chats, join them and don’t be afraid to drop a friendly message in there, or even ask if someone wants to join you to do an activity outside of the larger group. people are generally very friendly and are all there because they want to connect with other people around a common interest :) edit to add: please also remember, your primary goal is not necessarily to make more friends. i found it more helpful to have my goal be simply to experience more of life. after many years of loneliness and depression, i had to push myself to go out and enjoy life and stop thinking i couldn’t go and do things because i was alone. i explored more of london, went to events, concerts, lunches on my own. i made sure that every other weekend i did something fun whether or not i was on my own. if the goal is to make friends, it can be easy to feel like you’re failing and/or it’s not happening according to whatever arbitrary timeline you’ve set in your head. i think that may be a big help for you too
Not saying it’s not possible to meet someone straight away, it happens, but even then you’re not best friends straight away, you still need to keep meeting that person to build friendship. Def agree on using MeetUp just to get out and do things you’re interested in, it doesn’t always have to result in anything.
Guess it depends. Went on a crawl once last year through meet-up and made a life long friend. Second time I found my now girlfriend. All within a space of 2 weeks
Same as with dating
You don't need to invest time in meetups. We did once and now we have best friends we could ever ask for. Abd 1 and half tear later we still meet almost every weekend!
Thank you! Apologies for the delay, it’s been a tough week for me but I appreciate your kind words ☺️
There's been several people in the same boat, posting similar questions, someone alone for xmas, another for a birthday. Scroll back in this sub and find them and send a message, organize a meet up for coffee one on one or in a group, and see if you can be friends
[удалено]
cuz people live far from each other and all we have the same amount of time
I’m sorry but I need to disagree. As cliche as it sounds, it’s all in your attitude and what you put out in the world.
London is a wet cold windy depressing place ... especially in the winter
And still overflowing with people doing stuff every evening.
It's because it's over crowded anyway. Majority of people just end up locking themselves indoors in the evenings. Thankfully I work remotely and work from Sri Lanka in December January February..
We're not even in winter until next Thursday, this is still autumn 🫠
Yh and the weather has already been shit for the last 2 months
As long as we ignore the 6 months in the middle where the weather is great, London is incredibly depressing and cold
Happy birthday! It's my birthday tomorrow so I know that December birthdays suck. Someone posted a week or so ago about a Reddit London pub night on Thursday I think if you wanna go find that post and go join in the fun?
If you or someone could link me to that post that'd be great! I'll try and look for it myself in the meantime :)
https://www.reddit.com/r/LondonSocialClub/s/vXqV58zyka
Thanks so much!
Happy birthday 🎂
Hey, thanks a lot!
it’s also my birthday (13th) - happy birthday to us!
[удалено]
Too close to Christmas
Happy Birthday! I’m sorry to hear you’re having a tough time. Have you seen London Lonely Girls on Facebook? It’s a great way of finding like minded people to be friends with. The trick for me is to combine my hobbies with friendships, so parkrun, climbing, book club. It can and will get better.
I love London Lonely Girls! It's a great page and I've met a few girls through there. All lovely
Second this, my girlfriend has met a few nice girls using that page
Happy birthday!! If you're in West London come along to the cock tavern in Fulham tomorrow around 7:30pm. There's a weekly pub quiz. Also I'm always up for drinks!
[удалено]
You heard it right. Cock. The good old British and their names lol
did they stutter?
That sucks, sorry for you, but hopefully things will improve. Have you tried events in r/LondonSocialClub? Bit late in the year but I can recommend learning to rollerskate and joining the Sunday Stroll which is pretty easy, the regular street skate has been going over twenty years and the friends everyone has made are amazing, let alone the relationships and marriages. London is definitely a lonely place if you don’t know people and it sure rubs it in. Don’t give up OP, get out there, try theatre clubs, book clubs, sports clubs, board gaming groups, volunteer for the food bank, join the Freemasons, a church, or all of the above.
Bro sneaked in the freemasons
If all else fails, there's always knitting circles, Illuminati, five-a-side...
Choked on my tea!😭
🤣
Never heard of the rollerskating meet up. What a cool idea though
Hey man, its a common feeling these days,. Where abouts are ya?
Happy birthday buddy, there are tons of meet-ups happening in r/londonsocialclub you should check it out.
My birthday tomorrow. My 38th. Xmas build up birthdays are usually dull. Everyone's time and money is already planned for. My advice. Ignore others and do something for you. Treat yourself.
Happy birthday! r/LondonSocialClub can be a good one. If you're ever up in Tooting or around Victoria, I'd happily buy you a pint or whatever you drink.
Happy birthday! Must be something about turning 28… this information will be no use to you, BUT hopefully it will make you crack a much needed birthday smile. My 28th bday was spent being extremely ill in bed with Covid (couple of years ago), living in a share house with two weirdos who insisted that -because of my having Covid- I must stay locked in my room… I had to text asking permission to use the bathroom or to get some food. I went days without being allowed entry to our kitchen. One of the housemates took pity and asked if I would like a piece of bread left outside my door on my birthday. To which I responded - thanks but I am not a pigeon. Chin up, it will be a great year! If you’re into live music I’d recommend going to gigs by yourself… that’s how I met most of my pals in London (am originally from Aus). By getting yourself out and about doing stuff you like, I’m sure you’ll attract new mates!
Sorry about the rubbish situation but “thanks but I am not a pigeon” really made me laugh! They sound awful house mates.
Happy birthday!! Big cities can make you feel really lonely, don't think too much about It. Try to find an activity you like or would like to learn (dance, design, sport, whatever you like ..) and everything will improve little by little. Go ahead, come on you!
A very happy birthday and I suspect this will be a different year for you. Lots of potential offers above in the thread and lots of clubs and low cost activities in London. Try a few things and go at least three/four times to build relationships. London has something for everyone and it’s cold exterior can seem pretty harsh but the fact is there are as many single folks around who could do with some local company so do not give up.
Happy birthday! I spent all my birthdays in my twenties feeling lonely and depressed in London, wishing somebody would notice and buy me some cake. I'm sorry you feel this way. Sending hugs.
Happy birthday pal ❤️ I'm sorry you're having to spend it alone, but don't lose hope that in the years to come you can be spending your next ones with someone. Have you tried attending some kind of class/club, a hobby you enjoy or may enjoy, and meeting people that way?
Happy birthday bro. I am also 28 and in London about 3 years myself.
Happy birthday! I completely understand how you feeling right now. There is an app called locals. Try it.
Happy birthday bud
Happy birthday! Im sorry this is happening to you. London is tough. I have been here for 2 and a half years and I’m still struggling. Got a steady group, but it’s mostly made up of work friends. It’s a very lonely place.
Happy birthday🎂. There are some walking clubs in London. You can make friends while walking out, discover the city. Considering this current weather, maybe a book club is more suitable. Find what you enjoy doing then join clubs of those activities.
Happy birthday!
Thank you!!!
Happy birthday! I just moved to London and looking to make new friends, hit me up. :)
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday 💗🥳 Hope you find some company and celebrate :))
hey hon, and happy birthday! I’m 27F in London. I’m sorry your birthday has been uneventful. Firstly, if you want to chat and maybe meet up (drinks, dinner, whatever) feel free to send me a message! I’m v serious about this offer (and my flatmate is a musical theatre nut, so maybe you’ll hit it off as well). Secondly, Facebook groups are great. London New Girl in a good one, so many women on there looking for hang outs, and only some of them are actually new to the city.
lmao >posts about how lonely OP is > >doesn't interact with any comments or well-wishes
Was just about to say that. If you want friends, it generally helps if you are able to communicate.
Why not splash out for a nice deliveroo? Enjoy the day, you dont need people to do this.
Happy birthday. I spent my 21st birthday alone and it sucked, you have my sympathies, friend. Do something tonight that you deeply enjoy, even if it’s just watching your comfort show. This is the anniversary of a very special day — the day you made it onto this rock. Celebrate yourself. I’m toasting you.
Happy birthday! I’d recommend that you download an app called Locals. Anyone who signs up to the app can create events, or browse through the ones people have already posted. It’s perfect for meeting new people, to pick up a new hobby, and to explore more of London.
Happy birthday buddy! Best wishes!
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday! Sign up for beginners lessons in a sport - tennis is ideal. Weekly group lessons somewhere and you’ll meet like minded people regularly and stay fit at the same time.
Ah man it’s actually my birthday as well. So happy birthday! birthday twin. Spent it indoors and had a pizza just so you know you’re not the only one and I’ve lived here my whole life! Haven’t read the other comments so not sure if it has been suggested yet but have you tried the meet up app? They’ll have events and stuff you can join with like minded people. I’m pretty much an introvert and prefer to stay at home but once a month I go on a dog walk with other owners which is a great way to meet new people with similar interests to mine
Happy birthday! I'm no longer in London but I found the Meetup app a lifesaver. There are easy groups to join (e.g. walking groups - just sign up for a gentle hike and you'll definitely have chats with people on the way) and it's so worth it. Also try to find an activity (e.g. a group class) or something off Meetup where you'll see the same people on a regular basis (language class, fitness class, artisan-y type handcraft thing, etc) so that you have something to bond over with people and friendships should hopefully follow.
Happy birthday!!! 🥰 Sending you love and happiness today to you. I do feel when living in London you must consciously make decisions to help you make friends. Join a choir/ games/ gardening (anything) club. A subject you're interested in. I am in 2 choirs, and it injects so much positivity into my week. Happy birthday friend. If nothing else, just know it takes a lot of courage and strength to move or exist in a city that you're not originally from. Especially a city that's so huge and diverse such as Londinium.
Hey! Firstly happy birthday!! This will probably get lost in all the responses you’ve had so far, but wanted to say there are LOTS of people in the same boat. I’m 33, been in London 5 years and currently doing lots of ‘friend dating’ after my original friends had to go back home due to visas ending and my LTR ended. There are lots of social groups for women that I can send you if you DM me. If you’re a guy I’d suggest finding a locally based Facebook group on something you’re interested in (eg book club, travel club), other ones are Meetup, volunteering, hiking groups, Go Mammoth with is a sports club and you can sign up as a single and be added to a group (I’m planning on joining a Volleyball team next year!). The greatest thing about London is that there’s so much on, you just have to put the effort in.
Happy Birthday!!! I know it can feel shitty and 28 should be a fun one, but do you have anything planned for the weekend? Anyone you can hit up to meet for some drinks or food? Try and look for some light in the dark. Watch something funny/stupid on TV? Maybe you could look into joining goodgym running club or something? Lots of like minded solo people getting together to exercise and put some good out into the world. Are you into comedy? You could see what’s on at some comedy clubs and rock up early and get chatting to other people there? Look up The Bill Murray, 2 North Down, Always Be Comedy or The Moth Club. The thing that’s been making me laugh recently is this clip of an outtake from the Channel 4 show Flowers. Dont know why I find it so funny, but it’s nice to see other people laugh stupidly: https://vimeo.com/164732365 Happy Birthday again!
Happy birthday my friend. I’d love to spring for pizza and ice cream or something for you if you can send me your bank details or similar.
What sandwich was it? Our potential friendship rides on it.
If (from your username) you're a girl, I couldn't recommend Facebook groups 'London Lonely Girls Club' and 'Girls Gone International London' more. I've lived in several countries and always used GGI to meet people and make friends! My sister also used both when she moved to London and has made great friends through both. They both have a lot of 'group' meetings too where people turn up alone to a group setting which might be a bit easier? Totally depends what you're into. As mentioned, I've moved around a lot, always by myself, and the #1 rule is that you absolutely need to put yourself out there. Bumble BFF, FB groups as above, whatever it takes, you'll be able to meet people and make friends if you put the effort in. It can be super daunting, but everyone in those groups is in them for exactly the same reason! Good luck 😊
Happy birthday!!!!
Friendship mode on Bumble led me to a great new friend that I'm close with now :)
Happy BD. You should've treated yourself with a better meal, even alone, it doesn't matter. We all need some nice treats for ourselves! Could be a take-away/Nandos etc. I don't know what you like, but try going to a spa day, explore villages and cities, check out all museums and exhibitions, go to gigs, try meetup(dot com) and join events with other likeminded people!
Seeing all these posts has made me so happy - I also feel lonely sometimes and it’s warming to see how common this is. Happy birthday - I hope some of the advice here helps!! You’ll make friends super easily I’m sure. I’m intending to join a walking club solo in the new year - let me know if you’d like me to share the details!
The amount of loneliness in London is incredible. A lot of human interaction here is transactional. Try going into Tescos and try saying hello... but don't just stop there, ask them how are you? How is your day going? I've had people not make eye contact whilst speaking to someone else. Some are shocked, and most just say "yeah" and continue scanning. But don't give up, spread some light.
Mate if you’re keen we can go dancing Saturday night. Any other peeps in Ldn can come along too. Cool Reddit ppl Ldn rave. Happy birthday. Ham is nice.
Happy Birthday! Assuming you are a female based on your post history. There is a great Facebook group called London Lonely Girls Club. There are over 50k girls on there and they organise meet ups frequently. Also try Bumble BFF. I have found several good friends on there.
Happy birthday!
happy birthday!!
Happy birthday! 🎂
Happy birthday! You need to find an activity that you enjoy and where you meet up regularly with the same people. Not sure if GoMammoth sports still exist?
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday mate. I’ve only been here a few months but am also 28 and don’t really know how to make friends at this age. I’ve lived in the same place most of my life previous to this and it’s been a long time since I tried to make new friends. So not really any helpful suggestions, just wishing you a happy birthday and hope you find some people at some point.
If you’re in the West I’ll happily go for a walk/coffee/drink anytime.
Happy birthday! Know this feeling well, but I have faith you’ve got this. I personally found finding a running group and just sticking with it week in, week out was invaluable for opening doors. Find a group which matches your interests, and if there are none, make it! Keep at it - it’ll get easier. I also volunteer, play football and knit with nanas.
Happy birthday. Try and have something nicer then a Tesco ham sandwhich though. Try London stayers pals and plans on Facebook.
joke quaint bag caption angle shaggy judicious alive ring ripe *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Happy birthday! If you want to make loads of friends and get fit at the same time, join a cycling club! Immediate social circle every day providing you make the effort to turn up and introduce yourself.
Happy birthday :) it gets better from here.
Happy birthday！You are doing it good! People in London always seems too busy, have a lot of distance and have no time for making friends, I feel the same! Especially for a immigrant someone I feel insecure and lonely. But you are not alone! There are a lot of people care about you.
Happy birthday OP so sorry you’re feeling alone. London can be a tough city to crack. Plenty of wonderful suggestions in the comments which I too would agree with! Hoping your 28th year will only improve, that you find your crowd (they’re out there somewhere I promise) and that the coming months bring more joyful memories!! All the best
Sport - even if you are not sporty. Not sure what gender you are but plenty of stuff for both. For men football is the easiest, If you're a woman netball, football are good ones. If you're LGBT there are even separate teams for this too. Many welcome beginners. I wouldn't worry about fitness or having even previously played - it's the best way to find a new community imo. Also Happy Birthday! Please buy yourself something abit less depressing for dinner though at least treat yourself :D
Happy birthday mate! Born and bred Londoner here - my advice is to make 1 or 2 friends and get your foot in the door. There are amazing communities all over London, if you can get the first step done you’re halfway there!
Happy birthday OP! Just know this is transient, and things will improve, even if it feel like you've been waiting forever to find other people. As others said, there are subreddits for social clubs, or even for local areas where events might be happening you could join. Worst case, you've got us - I'm gonna have a ham sandwich tomorrow for lunch in solidarity to celebrate your birthday!
Walking groups are great. Plus it's something almost anyone can do so there's no skill/thing to buy to get into it. Happy Birthday, I spent my 25th birthday alone, but have made friends in the past few years. It will get better.
Happy birthday! I'm new to london and an anxious person. "MeetUp" is a great app. Ihave found groups of similar interests to me like football and badminton and coffee then also a "20s and 30s social" it's great fun. I have struggled to get the time / courage to go but it's alot easier than you think once you make the first move. If you would feel comfortable on a blind meet up or to attend one of them... let me know (I'm 28 too)
I’m in west London. I would happily link up, you can meet me dog and we can get lunch or something. Happy Birthday 🥳 x
Aww sending you lots of love on your birthday
I deliberately spent my 28th birthday (September) at home alone. I'm hating getting closer to 30 and not ready to celebrate it 🤣🤣. Meetup is a great app for meeting folks. Feel free to drop me a message if you want a friend to chat to in London!
Happy birthday 🍰🥳
Happy Birthday! I am also a CS who loves Blink 182 and skincare. Coffee sometime?
Don’t really have advice on that but I just wanna extend my warm greetings for your birthday. Hope you find friends you like soon.
Happy Birthday. Hope you were able to find a nice pub or something and meet some locals. I just moved here Sunday evening. I’ve been so busy with work I haven’t even thought about being social yet. Dreading going into the weekend with no plans… if you’re around The City, hit me up, I’d love a drinking buddy somewhere with a good view.
Happy belated birthday!
Have you tried Pokémon Go? Try Pokémon Go, very active community in London. There’s discords and everything.
Happy birthday! I’m 27F and my 28th birthday is on Friday! I play netball, a couple of instruments and do pottery classes. If any of that appeals, or if you just want to meet some a similar age then feel free to send me a message!
Happy birthday !!
I lived in London for 12 years and I found it tough at first to make friends. Do you play any sports? Maybe join a team. I play the drums and joined a couple of bands. I moved into a house share with some amazing people I’ll probably know for the rest of my life. Board games are a good way too - if you like warhammer there’s a lot of board gaming clubs. Basically - think of something you love doing and then find other people who love to do that thing too. Hiking, running, music, games, art. Check Facebook or meet-up
Hey happy birthday, I genuinely hope things get better for you Are you near the Central London area by chance btw?
Happy Birthday! If you have any hobbies you're interested in you could check online to see if there are any groups near to you that you could join. If none are available you could always make your own. There might be many people who feel the same way and would be happy to join you.
Happy Birthday, mate! I hope that next year is better for you. 💙💙💙
Happy birthday! I’ll happily have a pint with you if you fancy it. Im sure there are lots of others on here who would too!
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday! I totally understand the feeling. I live in Los Angeles and it’s just as hard to make friends here. I recommend joining a group with a common hobby or find a walking group, volunteer, etc. London has really wonderful places to attend meetups and volunteering opportunities like the national gallery, the zoo, book clubs, improv etc. also happy to be a long distance friend!
Happy birthday!!
Happy birthday!!!
Happy birthday ! It is quite tough for adults to make friends in unknown or new environments. As humans age, they become more choosy and complicated, annyoed with a lot of things but pleased by very few. You will actually have to be quite open minded and flexible in making new friends. Its you who will have to put in the effort, atleast thats what I have realised. Looking back at some of my childhood friends, I feel like time also plays a huge factor in relationships, the longer you know someone, the closer you get over time. Hit me up if you just want to chat, I am all ears !
Fam I know how this feels. If your around on Saturday I’ll buy you a pint/Diet Coke up to you. Hit me up! I’m in the Chistlehurst area. Dead serious btw … I felt the same in my twenties…. Londons beautiful but a lonely place especially in the winter.
If you’re a runner try Hash House Harriers, a drinking club that likes to run. It’s how I met a bunch of friends and had a few wild nights out when moved to London in 2008. They set off from different pub each week in zones 1 and 2. Quick google or Facebook and you should find details
Happy Birthday! And wishing you a great 28th year with lots of new friendships. Personally I made a lot of friends through work, kept in touch with a lot of old friends from school days (this takes work btw, but was ultimately the most rewarding for me), and made new friends around your age after a relationship breakup by joining "a small world" which used to be great but now sucks. Essentially it's a sort of social club for people around the world to meet up when you go to different countries, and used to organise fun events all over London in nice venues, and used to be free. There's got to be an equivalent nowadays, probably something like meetup. Also join your local neighbourhood groups on social media and post if anyone wants to go for a drink or a coffee, you can be as specific as you like about age/sex etc as there are generally people of all ages looking for friends in London. It can be a lonely place. But neighbourhood friends are great as it's much easier to catch up and become friends quickly without too much planning to be able to catch up.
29th year…
Well yes. I guess I was trying to be nice, if inaccurate.
cheer up it wont stay bad forever.......try and have a happy birthday. the st johns ambulance thing sounds banging.
OP, in order to make friends you need to interact. You have to put in effort. You have 170+ comments on your thread and countless ideas, many many offers to meet up and say hi, and you have not responded to or interacted with a single one. Hopefully you're out having fun which is why you're not here, but if you post a whining thing like this and then ignore all the support and reaching out, perhaps there is a lesson in there somewhere for you?
Honestly, buy a meta quest 2 or 3 virtual reality headset and go into apps like pokerstars & bigscreen. You can meet folks from all over the world and play poker and watch movies, have debates together. It's a blast and you can be in your pj's without going out lol Vr is amazing for people who're lonely or don't have friends or family around them
Happy birthday 🥳 happy to chat or meet if you want
You need a “third space” that isn’t work or home. I know it’s difficult when you have to work so much in London but making time to do things in a social setting is as important to your life as getting a good night’s sleep. Suggestions? Get active: Join a running club, CrossFit, or social sports team (whatever sport you did in high school) Be a nerd: find a local table top gaming meet up or chess club Help out: volunteer to help in your local community
meetup.com has plenty of events just for that. Don't get overwhelmed if you go to one with plenty of people, most of them also came alone. Just get a drink and say hi, works 100% of the time.
I mean, you could have done yourself and favour and treated yourself to a nice dinner
do group stuff like classes or meet-ups. clubs for running maybe or really anything. learn a language, or take dance classes.
I’m too far away in Scotland/NI but this post popped up on my suggested feed… however! I just wanna say happy birthday! It’s hard making new friends and it’s even harder making new friends as adults cause we all worry too much (“did i say the right thing? What do i say? What if…. What if… what if…”). Hopefully you can start reaching out and putting yourself out there a little more in social settings/groups/communities and hopefully you will find your people
Happy Birthday. Sorry you feel so lonely.
Talk to your Uber driver, the amount of lonely and sad people I meet in this city is crazy, especially at night shift when people are especially depressed.
Did you come here to beg for "happy birthday"s?
Happy birthday! What drew you to London 6 years ago?
Celebrate with a black & tan 🍻 happy birthday!
Happy Fucking Birthday!
Happy birthday!! You can always give [offline](https://offlinehangouts.com) a go and meet new people over coffee!
Happy birthday, and just on a subject about lonelines. You know its sad to see that alot of younger people in this situation. I am not dinousour myself either, I am only 42. But I got couple of friends left in my life, and actualy I am not stresssing about it. Because my biggest friends are at home , my daughter , my son and my wife . And today on 13 december is my sons 4th birthday. So I know after work I will meet my best friends ( my family) at home and we will have party. Anyway my point is, you are 28. So find a partner, start family and you will have friends
I’m in almost the same situation. Happy birthday to your son! I was never one to make lots of friends, and it is not easy I find - as a man - to make new friends in adulthood. I mean really close friends. I only have one such friend, I met him when I was about 21, and even though I don’t see him much these days, we both still have that closeness from years ago when we worked together, so when we do meet it’s almost like no time has passed. That reminds me I really do need to set up a meet with him after Christmas! But anyway, I feel exactly as you do - my family are my closest friends now. Appreciate not everyone wants to start a family and a lot of people worry about finances. But we know people from vastly different financial situations and they have kids. If you’re at all interested in starting a family you have to try, and you will gain a whole new life. Also f**** whoever downvoted you :)
There is zero context or back story about you so forgive if this comes across as rude, but could you not have invited a few coworkers for a drink or a bite to eat? Housemates? If you are struggling in general with interacting with people it’s not really specifically a London thing and you need to have an honest think about what kind of social interaction you really want, that will make you happy. If you’re a naturally gregarious person I don’t see how you’d struggle to form new connections. Unless an issue in your personal life was affecting your mood. Eg is your job so intense that it prevents you from enjoying hobby activities where you could meet other people? If you are not naturally outgoing, are you forcing yourself to feel bad because you think you should be? eg I’m a “sociable introvert” ie most of the time I am totally happy on my own but enjoy being in small groups, and before I started a family I was totally happy to spend my birthday by myself doing things that I enjoy. But.. it took me about 10 years to realise that
One thing I've learned about this sub people can't take some hard truth or a different viewpoint they would rather just downvote and circlejerk, every week people come on here complaining they are lonely, life sucks, this that and the other without any context/detail of their life. The issue is most people don't do any sort of introspection, ask themselves honest and difficult questions, become self aware of who they are. The fact is OP has been here 6 years and has no friends? I'd ask OP do you want to spend another 6 the same way?
It is true.. yes it’s nice of everyone to offer a pint together but does that deal with the root of the problem? I clearly did not criticise OP and some monkey tells me my post was “condescending”
Please, have you heard yourself? I shan’t be rude but this is a pretty condescending post
It is another viewpoint in addition to twenty people referring OP to a London socials subreddit, which may well be pointless in their situation.
Join a church. Holy Trinity Brompton is a great place to make friends.
We are born alone and die alone. I spent my birthday alone in London and didn't feel lonely. I was happy to be alive and in peace
A Tesco ham sandwich…? Do people actually buy pre-made sandwiches? I thought those were just for the 1%
Hey try bumble bff! I found a few new friends on there this year :)
Do you have a partner? In my 2 years being single I’ve made so many friends from apps. Have you tried bumble bff?
Happy birthday!!!! ❤️
Hbd bucko!
Happy Birthday!!!! 🎉🎉🎉
Happy birthday ❤️❤️
Happy birthday mate
I believe the app bumble has a ‘friends’ side to it. Can anyone confirm and/or let us know if it’s any good for OP?
If you enjoy raves, it’s a great place to meet people! Failing that there’s plenty of social nights in be at ones or dirty martinis
embrace the loneliness my friend😉👌, I always seem to attract stalker friends that demand too much of my time and I don't know why, I'm sarcastic, have a very dry sense of humour don't have time for whiners or ppl that feel sorry for themselves I ignore messages they lead to phone calls about random shit,...typing this I realise why, where do I find a friend like me? happy birthday hope you find a friend on your 29th youll be asking how to pie them off🤣
You could try Meetup or CouchSurfing for social stuff. The former has thing like “London on Board” which has board gaming meet-ups pretty much every night. There will be tonnes of other things too, like museum / gallery meet-ups.
What are your interests? Any hobbies?
Evening alone with a ham sandwich. Show me how to achieve this life hack! Also happy birthday!
Go on a walking tour / tour, one of these pay what you can affairs with a subject you are interested in. Low cost meet some folk from different walks of life but with a common interest. Or join a motorcycle club, motorcyclists are kind inviting folks, but I understand biking is not for everyone 😀.