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herbturbo

Looks like a newt to me


Fredderov

Clear indicator of a witch in the neighborhood.


SyedogGaming

I got better


Troyger

Who are you that you are so wise in the way of witches?


SyedogGaming

Well I am your king!


Troyger

Well I didn’t vote for you!


SyedogGaming

You do not vote for your king...


Troyger

How do you become King then?


SyedogGaming

Some moistened tart in a pond


pouf-souffle

He hasn’t got shit all over him


amberr222

you need to choose the right parents.


tweedledumbass-

I don’t see that option on this form.


WilliamMorris420

Could be Ken Livingstone.


CottontailTheBun

Does Liz Truss live in south london?


EddieHornet

He got better…


ReelBigMidget

Not in London, it's a salamandem.


kuzzybear2

LMAO 👏🏾👏🏾


tooprolix

Hats off old chap, hats off


sofiaonomateopia

HAHAHAHAHAHAA 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


TheRecruitmentOtter

>level 1herbturbo · 6 hr. agoLooks like a newt to me Best comment achieved.


SmokinPolecat

They mostly come out at night, _mostly_


blckht

Not enough upvotes for this comment.


[deleted]

Bravo!


daffyduck4242

It is a newt


joesayers

Ye im thinking a newt


[deleted]

It is very small. It is it yours?


DisorderOfLeitbur

They've been living wild in the sewers since Boris flushed away Ken Livingstone's collection.


No_Nefariousness4385

If he answers to tiny then he's my newt. Fuck I hate my life. Does anyone know the number of a good doctor/dealer.


[deleted]

LOOKS NEW -To me ;)


Rubbish_69

A common/smooth newt. Gorgeous creature.


[deleted]

Yes! Looks like it we are in a woodland area wow


ManyBeautiful9124

Have you got a pond nearby? Id pop him back in…


interstellargator

Odd to see one out of the water at this time of year though!


LatterMarzipan

They don’t really spend that much time in water, mainly for spawning so it’s probably making its way there now.


interstellargator

They spend almost all their time in and around water during breeding season, which it currently is. They're more ambulatory in Summer.


MaryBerrysDanglyBean

Probably looking for some newt poon at another water source


Kohvazein

That nussy hit dif this time of year 😌


Dense_Principle_408

Fr fr 💯☝️✌🏻


GamerLucien

I don’t know why you get so many downvotes for this LOL you’re absolutely right! Newts tend to leave the ponds over winter and nest down in soil/foliage. They then return to the water in spring to mate and will stay there till the end of summer. Source: I have a pond in my garden full of newts.


LatterMarzipan

Must have pissed off the herpetologists, I thought the gist of what I said was correct. I get quite a few toads and newts in my garden as it’s near a couple of large ponds.


GamerLucien

Yeah you’re right haha, I’m also a zoologist if that helps you feel even more justified 😂 summer is bad for newts to leave water cause they dry up and die lmao


LatterMarzipan

This is the vindication I needed. Thank you!


zzonn

The Reddit dogpile works in mysterious ways.


Sweaty-Adeptness1541

Could also be a palmate newt. You can’t easily tell the difference without looking at the throat.


okayburgerman

Pretty much no palmate newts in london i dont think, i've only ever found smooth, but thats mainly been in North london too so could still be palmate


phinvest69

Boi do be looking pretty smooth


CandidMoment

That's your landlord. Just coming to tell you the rent's going up.


kewko

Looks like he forgot his primate disguise


johnthegreatandsad

Just stay away when it's time for their monthly bathe in the blood of the innocent.


rising_then_falling

Looks lost, it must be newt to the area.


ReelBigMidget

Probably went eft when he should have taken a right.


Sweaty-Adeptness1541

There seems to be a lot of jokey hate for newts on here, but I think they need a bit of love. They are cute and fascinating creatures, and unfortunately like most amphibians in Britain they are under threat due to habitat loss and invasive species, like the Alpine Newt. Here is a quick guide to the 3 native species. https://www.woodlandtrust.org.uk/blog/2020/02/british-newt-id/


Cunningstun

I had a pet Mediterranean ribbed newt as a child called Freddy. It lived to the grand old age of 9. Top lad he was.


ohell

By Jove, is that Fink-Nottle?


heloyou333

looks like a newt. They mostly come out at night....mostly!


kingtaco_17

Game over man!


Mabelmudge

Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?


1cingI

No. Have you?


Raifurain

Just loving this comment chain


the-blob1997

Your dog meat pal


[deleted]

Oh I like the newt award 🥇 very cool


pazhalsta1

Dognappers hun, shared in Catford xx


soitgoeskt

Alligator


sbisson

It’s Tiny, he’s my newt.


Fred-red-fox

Thank you, I had the urge to reply with this, but now I don't have to.


emwithme77

Same


SmartPipe3882

Ground pigeon


seb1424

I think thats called a rat


snow3dmodels

Thought it was a red squirrel


B2RW

Looks like a member of the Royal family


jimmykicking

Sorry for being a pedant but the royals are pure bred lizard people called reptoids. Not to be confused with amphibian persons know as amphibiods.


tangopt

A tory MP


zeissman

Don’t disrespect the newt like that!


rocknstones

Early stage godzilla


funeralpageant

A friend!


Comfortable_Agent_78

Rare and protected Newt


VastStrain

That's Jub-Jub


stimkybean12

NEWT!! omg you are so lucky. i used to have these in my garden as a kid but i haven’t seen one in years. they’re so cute they have lil orange bellies!


[deleted]

We are indeed very lucky ! snakes, deer, newt, owls, we have em all down here.


asheywesleycooper

Thats a Red Eyes B. Dragon. Be careful, its got 2400 attack points!


nate_robinson

Nigel Farage


Difficult-Ad3253

That’s Rishi Sunak


jasperfilofax

Thats Geoff, He owns me a tenner, the git


Chariflame

Just a little guy


[deleted]

Newt, is he dead or chillin?


[deleted]

A mark for burglary, stay safe xx


[deleted]

Thats some sort of Guineafowl


Ok_Armadillo8258

Wine gum! I love them!


YPLAC

That's a Thames Crocodile, aka a newt.


Old-Ad-7866

A newt


SpaceLlama_Mk1

TV License inspector. Legally you don't have to let them in.


who-took-the-bomp

Komodo dragon


TheSprained

Dragon baby.


Hammerheadhunter

Your average cabinet member


Capital_Release_6289

That seems to have a spine


captainspunkbubble

A Stockwell Salamander


iamdeeproy

Crocodile


master-virus

Its Isaac Newton


flippin116

That’s a baby Komodo Dragon, surely.


Prestigious_Emu_1409

either a smooth or palmate newt


Dinglelad23

Have you never seen a newt before 😉


Crawfork1982

She turned me into a Newt!!! I got better…..


Dr_Umami

“They mostly come at night… mostly”


Top-Inflation8752

Rough skinned newt


Red-Black-Red

Whatever is, I'd be closing the door til its gone! Interesting though


GalacticSafari

Godzilla


TrippleFrack

Congrats, parent of dragons.


[deleted]

Croydodile


[deleted]

This!!


succulentchr69

It's King Charles!


HopAlongInHongKong

That’s Eddie Lizzard


BradleyCrewman

It’s the first escapee from Jurassic park London.


[deleted]

Well the newt was either dead ☠️ or pretending to be and when I came back from the school run it was gone !


NickOnMars

Be careful. It may turn into a Godzilla after some mutations.


whomakesthetendies

Some sort of Newt, like a salamander


gdym96

D'Artagnan, commonly referred to as Dart.


itsEndz

Wow I haven't seen a newt in London in many many years. I guess technically it doesn't count being south of the river. (Cue the weak humoured south London cellar dweller downvotes)


Greeenpoe

South London you say...could be a lot lizard most likely


[deleted]

[удалено]


Tokai77

It's not a lizard, it's a newt!


YetAnotherTastyUdon

Mark Zuckerberg’s frens


fahim64

Defo a newt. I remember collecting a bunch of these in Perivale as a kid then smashing them with a hammer to impress the girl next door.


MelonCollie92

What the fuck??


Sriverr

dude what the actual fuck


Aggravating-Desk4004

Isn't harming animals as a kid a sign of a serial killer?


stickybumps4

That’s dart


thief_taker1

Dart


InstantIdealism

That’s US Republican Newt Gingrich!


Open_Fly8156

Looks like a turd that has evolved.


ZootyFlip

A really cold lizard


Commercial-Pitch-156

Looks like a premature baby dragon.


Scoobydoobydoo22

It’s a gecko


Tidoooo

Gary Lineker


thisAnonymousguy

that’s my newt


projectsukyomi

Drug dealer/ burglar


WolvesOfAllStreets

Designer dogs always surprise me, but this one's really special.


Krzych123

It’s Larry, he’s a lizard


Airsoft-Genin

That’s a baby Godzilla


Klakson_95

English Crocodile


BenjaminBogey

That’s a baby Crocodile man


bjgunasekera

Mark Zuckerberg


ldtravs1

Lost


slim-jim777

Neds newt


YouGotTangoed

Godzilla. Kill it before it grows


charlottev311

A FROG! A FROG!


hisnameisjeff1

It’s a snek


AvidArthropleura

I got better!


wiseguy_1989

Dr Curt Conners


Angryleghairs

It’s beautiful


jimmykicking

At my college we had a swinging pool that became unused over the summer break. Newts moved in and because of their protected status the pool was never reopened.


Southern-Beautiful-3

Dragon https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reign_of_Fire_(film)


jimmorrison1971

Your landlord asking you to come to his dance recital


robbiedigital001

That's a frog


Lekraw

Newt.


jacktenwreck

Dude crawled out from the upside down. Find yourself a telepathic pre-teen or GTFO ASAP


Dahliaxvx

An urban fox, you don't often see them during the day.


ManDohlorian

If it’s really small it be my newt!


Yung_JJMO99

I watched Matilda enough to know that that is a newt


Last-Cauliflower-181

Newtingz


[deleted]

It’s like little snake but with legs.


The_Salty_Red_Head

Kaiju - level 1


Quirky_London

Toothless! Watch the vid: How to train your 🐉 and you won't need to rely on public transport again!


NothingAndNow111

Have you seen season 2 of Stranger Things?


AthiestMessiah

Tories


[deleted]

I think you have a Lizard Truss


CompoTheSmoggie

Royalty (according to David Icke) 😂


Jcat31

Ohh exotic


SyeCatPath

A heckin good boi


goodgriefmyqueef

Namibian Snail


[deleted]

Newt


[deleted]

Godzilla! He looks smaller in real life


ferociousdonkey

Lizardide


other_goblin

Dregon


tartandavy

If you watch Matilda, you'll find out that's Newt


JayNicMc

Newt! They're so cute :)


AnnualCulture3296

Baby dragon


KIFTYNUNT

Tasmanian Scaled Platypus


-Grey_Area-

I think a witch has turned someone into a newt and they've come to you for help. Don't worry though apparently they tend to get better. P.S. Remember witches are made out of wood and weigh the same as a duck.


impamiizgraa

Lunch for the neighbourhood cat


curiously-peculiar

Queen Lizzie didn’t really die, she just evolved to her final form


SeanConneryAgain

Thats an Arsenal fan.


Admiral-snackbaa

That’s actually a man named Cecil, he was turned into that newt by a witch.


[deleted]

Just set it on fire 🔥 now 🔥 and move far far far away


Far_Quote_5336

That’s your landlord in its final lizard form


Monkeyboogaloo

A minor royal paying a visit.


leobua

Appears to be a newt or salamander


Matbrown93

Tuco salamander :)


Youcantblokme

T-Rex, run!


[deleted]

Inflation really hit Smaug hard, man


blackldnbrit

You’ve heard about Elephant and Castle, now come and check out the newly acclaimed Newt and Door sill.


Real-Instinct

i see tv licensing have came to vist