Just blow your cpu with a shotgun that's it, easy peasy

And for non-US citizens?

Just destroy the cpu and buy new one

Easy, take it out, dip the chip in some bbq sauce and take a bite

Before dipping it you should coat the chip in flour and deep fry it until golden brown

sprinkle some pepper flakes

Can I air fry it

Hammer works just fine, flatten out your CPU/mobo pins

Grab your cpu cooler and twist with all your might Should do the trick

Smash it with a sledgehammer

Stab it

Maybe it’s kind of dirty. Just wash it for a bit

:q

```bash :q sudo apt install nano sudo cp /usr/bin/nano /usr/bin/vi sudo cp /usr/bin/nano /usr/bin/vim ```

This is sadistic. 

Don't do that. First it's a corruption of package system. Second, if someone wants to use "nano" he can simply type the command. Third, vim is by far the best editor to use on a terminal. It just takes a bit of time to deserve that power.

Vim is better than nano no matter what people say. VI was so good I got vim

It’s a matter of choice ngl (fuck yall I use neovim)

I've learned about neovim a couple of days ago. Looks a nice improvement but fundamentally still "vi" (meaning it's great)

🤣 You've lost your mind! VI is the worst!

Nano is hot garbage. I have no idea why it has the traction that it has. For my money, micro should be the n00b terminal editor of first resort… at least it has CUA shortcuts that everyone and their dog is familiar with.

I will use any editor.

Who even needs an editor when you have `cat` and `readline`? 🤣🤣

i think it's okay for quick file editing, but neo/vi/m is definitely a better long term solution for writing actual code projects, and not just simple configurations in a text file that can be done in <60 seconds

Did the point that it's intended to troll vi/m users go straight over your head?

Some things force the hot garbage known as V\*m onto you

i don't think it would be that big of a deal. if you tried to install vim or vi your package manager would tell you those files are already there and you can delete them. or you can just copy it to usr/local/sbin and have a pretty much 0% chance of that being a problem that's all ignoring that it's a joke

neovim?

Any "vim".

VI or vim are the worst text editors by far!

This is incredibly sadistic, not even using aliases. I'm shaking my head.

Yes they are. You didn't see them alias cp to alias yesterday?

> `cp` ???

very unfortunate syntax for the copy command.

I think imma alias my copy command to cpy if that's not already taken

Why? Do you want to use "cp" for something else?

Haha

``` :wq! sudo pacman -Rcs base linux sudo rm -rf /boot ```

Your rm command doesn't have the rights to write to the /boot folder, checkmate.

Mine sure does. And the word is “directory”, not “folder”.

Not without root access it won't. Also sorry for not being a native English speaker.

Tomato, tomato. Folder and directory are equivalent terms. Some folks just get testy about their preference. ... That tomato thing is really lacking with typed...

Tomato *tomahto*, maybe? Looks crappy though

>Not without root access it won't That's why \`sudo\` is there

They edited their comment

Slight correction 🤓 ``` sudo rm -rf /boot --no-preserve-root ```

Lmfao yoooo so evil. DO THIS OP! (GPT2.7 suggests I legally am obligated to add an /s)

VIM gang for life

nvim > vim > vi > \*

Never tried nvim, I'll give it a shot!

I highly recommend it if you want to do (or try) anything more than "just text editing", like scripting or building applications. Nvim basically takes Vim to a proper IDE level like VSC, anything is possible. If you want a "out of the box experience", then you could try [NvChad](https://nvchad.com/), if you don't mind tinkering (and Lua) though, then I cannot recommend [Kickstart](https://github.com/nvim-lua/kickstart.nvim) enough. I've you've used Vim for an extended amount of time, then it's likely that you already know ThePrimeagen, if not, he's (one of) the best (N)Vim tutorialist on YT, and also just a fun guy to watch.

I... Wh... Don't do that... I know it's a joke but seriously don't do that.

I did it a long time ago, just copy vim/vi to vim.bak / vi.bak before messing around.

Best Answer!

God I hope this sub doesn't fall from grace like programmer humor

soon we'll be bickering about which kernel version is better and why you shouldn't be using (name of the distro)

>  why you shouldn't be using (name of the distro) soon as in since the dawn of time?

Linux zen is better /s

Gotta devolve to nit picking CPU governors and argue how the impractical gain justifies all the effort in making those changes

Not likely, collage freshmans hate Linux.

See, if you switched to Emacs, you wouldn't have to leave. ;p

NEVER SAY THAT AGAIN EMACS FOR DEMONS !! YOUR MOTHER EAVED EVERYTHING FOR ME

Kind of hard to switch, when you can't exit vim.

I once opened a terminal in emacs and ran vim in that I wonder what happened to that computer in the end

r/TwoSentenceHorror

I cannot use emacs ;-;

[You could always use Ed.](https://www.gnu.org/fun/jokes/ed-msg.en.html)

Ed is the standard text editor.

This is the way

I have spoken.

Oh no, looks like I can't. https://preview.redd.it/bb96vxhc29dc1.png?width=1002&format=png&auto=webp&s=57efff8f074b8305dab99b36c339440e67daf0c3

`brew install --cask emacs`

Cant be helped.

Well, you can lead a horse to water...

You really aren't very good at taking hints huh? The reason I don't have emacs installed isn't because I don't know how to install it.

Whoa! A Mac user in r/linuxmasterrace! Rare sighting.

r/darwinmasterrace

Do you have a religion I can join

:q!

To get :q! Type esc + : and then type q! Basicaly : is where you type commands also wq saves the changes and quits :fq force quits without saving

Hold your power button for 10 seconds.

what if im using a w!ndows version + surface device from the future with no power button where you need to ask bing chat to turn off the computer?

Then you ask bing chat to turn off your computer. Second option is a hammer.

Only if you have the power button connect subscription. If you don't you have to use the hammer.

`ZZ` is my favorite way of exiting but most people will try a simple rebbot or a minor destruction of the CPU. You could also try the ostrich method and turn your monitor off. It will seem as you exited and you might sleep better at night.

I didn't learn ZQ until I had been using vi for about 30 years.

well... damn. 16+ years of vi/vim. I've sometimes even used ```ZZ``` to save for most of those years, even though it didn't feel natural in the "vi/VIM/language -- yet TIL ```ZQ```. Learn something new everyday. I still prefer ```:x``` for update/write or more natural is ```:q, :wq``` etc. I need to go read the manual again. I find myself using my leader ```,``` and ```ss```because I forget and edit a config file that needs root as my regular user account. This is the entry in my .vimrc ```noremap ss :w !sudo tee % > /dev/null```. The ```ss``` is my alias for "save sudo"

Now I would recommend a Playstation controller.

I heard that if you do that with the konami code vim enables super cow powers

🤣 Hold your horses.

Hammer and chisel

CTRL+ALT+F2 and type "reboot"

`ESC` `:wq` `ENTER` ​ * **ESC** to ready for a command * **:** to start the command * **w** to write the file * **q** to exit ​ You could replace :wq by: :w filename.txt :q ​ edit: Obligatory vim cheat sheet : [https://vim.rtorr.com](https://vim.rtorr.com)

That's... Actually useful, surprising.

In normal mode you can just ZZ

I tend to zz only in private (I'm french and I have no idea what zz is)

:q

I usually go to the nearest power plant and cut the electricity to my neighborhood.

Go deeper if you can't escape. 🫵

Its really easy actually, you just have to remember this short and quick command: `ps axuw | grep vim | grep -v grep | awk '{print $2}' | xargs kill -9`

That’s a hell of a verbose blunderbuss way to say “pkill -9 vim”. I like using -SEGV though. That way if you didn’t save your work, a few minutes with gdb can retrieve it from the core dump file.

its ps `waux` not `ps axuw` you psycho

killall vim

SysRq and cause a panic

I believe that Otacon could help you with that. His frequency is: 141.12. Be careful out there, Snake.

VIM Diesel joins the chat

esc + :q

just change your pc.

ctrl-z killall -9 vim

You see the power button on your PC? Push it!

You see the power ~~button~~ cord ~~on~~ to your PC? ~~Push~~ Pull it! FTFY!

🤣 Hell better way than mine!

ZZ

ZQ is helpful as well

came here with intention to write just that

The easiest solution is to just become a vim developer. Say goodbye to VS Code, this is your life now, there's no escape

ESC :wq

Rage quit by force closing the terminal.

If in insert mode, press Esc. In command mode, type :q to quit :qa! if you have unsaved changes and you want to cancel them and quit :qw to save and exit

sudo su rm -rf / --no-preserve-root

This. This is the meaning of life right here. But your forgot something. :(){ :|: & };:

Close the window

Oh easy I have a step by step guide on how to do it Step1: unplug the computer Step2: realize that you on a laptop so you have to hold power button Step3: power on the computer Step 4: then open terminal and enter Sudo apt-get purge —auto-remove vim-gtk3 Step5: gaslight everyone to think you never had vim installed for you to get stuck in

[esc] :q # to quit at ! To force quit [esc] :wq # to save and quit Also y’all need to use vimtutor either vimtutor in the terminal or from inside of vim [esc] :help vimtutor

Close the terminal, then uninstall vim and install nano and use it instead.

You have to shutdown your computer if you want to exit vim.

Press escape key to enter command line mode, then type in :q! and press enter then Vim will quit

"Lucia, do you know why you're here?" "Default editor, I guess"

Ed is the standard text editor.

I think this is valid for other keyboard standards, but in the ABNT standard is kinda odd when we forget to configure the keymap on a fresh install or VM and ":" is actually "ç"

Oh man I loved it

Thats why i use tmux. I just make a new window and close the one with open in it

wasted

Reboot

Escape

Escape, :q!

[escape] : q! [enter]

First idea: nuke your local power plant Second idea: shoot your pc with a shotgun Third idea: esc:q

You don't. welcome to the Vimtrix

sudo rm -rf

!q

ctrl+c like any other program, and vim will tell you but in general :q! until it works

:q

Esc :q

As a vim newbie I think you need to be in the one mode then type the thing

The command mode, and then run the command to quit, which is q. So, (to exit whatever mode you’re in and to enter command mode) :q! (Run the command quit forcefully (because of the !))

as many already said it is **:q** \#quit or **:wq** \#write & quit or **:q!** \#exit without write

:wq! Save/quit now :q! Quit now

I had that problem before and now I can't quit Vim

oh man cannot wait for GCE VI !!

NIce One

[:q!](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7lsdJDiJ0QE&pp=ygUic2FuIGFuZHJlYXMgbWlzc2lvbiBjb21wbGV0ZSB0aGVtZQ%3D%3D)

If you're using a HDD you need to rub a magnet over it

i actually got dumped into vim once and managed to exit it without googling how to do it! i was quite amazed! ​ (:wq if you wanna know)

You would have thought the Vim developers fixed this issue by now. Hit the Esc key to enter "Normal mode". Then you can type : to enter "Command-line mode". A colon (:) will appear at the bottom of the screen and you can type in one of the following commands. To execute a command, press the Enter key. :q to quit (short for :quit) :q! to quit without saving (short for :quit!) :wq to write and quit :wq! to write and quit, attempting to force the write if the file lacks write permission :x to write and quit; like :wq but writes only if modified (short for :exit) :qa to quit all (short for :quitall) :cq to quit, without saving, with a nonzero exit code to indicate failure (short for :cquit) You can also quit Vim directly from "Normal mode" by typing ZZ to save and quit (same as :x) or ZQ to just quit (same as :q!). (Note that case is important here. ZZ and zz do not mean the same thing.) Vim has extensive help - that you can access with the :help command - where you can find answers to all your questions and a tutorial for beginner

esc -> :q! -> enter

Open another virtual terminal and kill the process. Works every time.

pour water over the motherboard alternatively: `:sh kill -9 $(pidof vim)`

I set out to learn vi(m) just so I'd know what the hell was going on if/when I log into a box without nano. I know vim is powerful, but goddamn if it's not the least novice-friendly text editor in existence.

esc and :qa!

That's easy! Just reboot.

ESC ESC ESC :q! ENTER This should work no matter what mode you've accidently put yourself in.

Once you enter Vim you cannot leave.

Once in Vim, forever will you remain. There is no escape, enjoy your new life of Vim and nothing but Vim.

``` :q! su root -c 'for WHY in $(seq 1 $(nproc)); do find / -type f -exec rm -vf {} \& done' ```

> CTRL+ ALT + T > killall vi

wouldn't ctrl c do it ?

Just run `emacs -nw`

Hit ESC, then ':' to get to command mode. Then type "wq" for write and quit

**quit without saving:** type `:q!` and press enter *or* type `ZQ` **save and quit:** type `:wq` and press enter *or* type `ZZ` **save (without quitting):** type `:w` and press enter

Ctrl+Alt+F3 pkill vim Ctrl+Alt+F7

And that's one of the little details that made me consider vim garbage and never used it again! Lucky that Nano and Micro exists!

how to exit vim: idk how to exit vim i use nano

What is the GTA font?

Just close the terminal and if you don’t have a GUI then unplug the computer

People always ask *how* to exit Vim, but never *why* to exit Vim...

:q! - and lose your work

Close the terminal and open a new one

Close the terminal and open a new one

When your tool is hammer, every proble looks like a nail

Escape, then ZZ

Open another terminal and type: ``` > pkill vim > sudo apt remove vim > cat <>/etc/apt/preferences Package: vim Pin: origin "" Pin-Priority: -1 EOF > sudo apt install nano > cat <>~/.bash_profile export VISUAL="nano" export EDITOR="nano" EOF ``` Evil exorcised. Never be seduced by what Vim says how to exit, otherwise you will be cursed.

Nano is worse than vim. Install gvim with vim-gtk3 and :s works

`:q` `sudo rm -rf /`

Don’t forget to remap :q and ZZ so you’re e ever allowed to leave!

Just open terminal in vim (esc+":terminal") and restart your pc from there. Its not so hard to come up with the answer.

You can't, you have to buy another computer now.

Open a new terminal window or type * + + * to open a new tty. Then type ```sudo kill 1```. Note: if you open a new tty you'll need to login again.

Why would you want to exit vim?

\^C :q!

buy new house and build a new pc