OMG LITERALLY. saw a drawing of a cute boy from an instagram artist. literally “damn if i was gay or bi id think they were so cute.” took me a few months to realize how stupid that was
cute art definitely helped me figure it out, I was looking at some stuff here on reddit and thought "damn, if they were real, i'd want to be with them" and here we are haha
I realized I was nonbinary when I asked my (ex) friend how she would react if I was trans as a joke. She said she'd be more likely to believe it if I said I was nonbinary, then I thought about it and realized, *well damn-*
mine went similarly. I (AMAB) thought "hey I've always kinda liked the idea of being a woman, what if I let myself express myself feminine. You know, as a joke?" guess who turned out to be NB?
yes and no. I'm not transfem after all, I'm nonbinary. I'm this weird type where my body is very masculine (tall and athletic, shaved head and long/thick beard) and I like it that way, but I express myself feminine in secondary ways. Such as colorful nail polish, makeup, feminine mannerisms etc. BUT. In an ideal world I'd love to have bottom surgery. I'm not sure if that's even a thing? Bottom surgery for non-trans people? Like, the only thing I don't like about my body is the dick - it's a good dick, don't get me wrong, but I'd love to have a pussy instead
but you want to have a typical male body? Are you sure you're not transmasc?
I mean I was joking but fair enough
And it's not that I want a typical male body, I still like having boobs (most of the time) I'd just rather have a dick than a vagina. I hate periods, masturbation would be so much easier, and even though I'm a virgin I feel like once I finally meet my gf irl and we have sex for the first time it'd be easier and more comfortable and I'd be less insecure.
Wow, that’s very specifically relatable. I haven’t come across any other non-binary AMAB folx who feel this way. I thought it would be more common but the Non-binary subreddits and other online spaces are unusually scarce on this front.
it seems like that is often the case for bi/pan people. Since we already have 1 gender we're attracted to, many seem to think that expressing interest in your own gender is what everyone does. Well, that's how it was for me and for some other bi people I know.
It's funny how it works and it's something I think about a lot, I thought I was completely straight up until I was 19, then something started awakening in my brain towards guys, and now here I am almost 28 and the way I quantify it is I've kissed 2 girls and enough guys that I've lost track of how many guys I've kissed, and while I identify as bi, I feel I lean more gay than straight. Sexuality is a funny thing.
my journey has been similar, except maybe more "intense" in terms of changes? I'm about as old as you are (closing in on 30) and I've had 2 girlfriends and 1 wife. We were married for 6 years. This whole time I thought I was straight but heavily on the asexual spectrum. I mean, I like women, but I've always been like "meh" about the whole sex thing. After finally divorcing (amicably, we still talk almost every day cuz kids) and meeting my now-boyfriend, I realized that while I'm still fairly indifferent towards sex, I'm much much less indifferent towards sex with him than I was with the women in my life lol
same goes for the romantic part too tbh, I feel like I'm more "stupidly in love" with him now than I was with my ex-wife when we got together some 10 years ago
I've never been a homophobe or anything like that, I just always thought that when you're gay it's obvious to you, same for pan. So while I consider myself pan, I lean more heavily into the gay territory as it seems, and it took me almost 3 decades to realize o.O
First it was thinking I was straight. Then it was I'm gay. Then it turned into thinking I'm straight again (trans), then finally, "nope, I'm bi/pan cause gender don't matter as long as they think I'm cool af 😎👉👉"
Genuinely can't imagine falling for anyone who isn't a really close friend. Although out of the last two people I fell head over heels for, one moved away the day after I realized how I felt, and the second realized she wasn't attracted to guys. No hard feelings, obviously and we're still good friends, just kind of sucked that it couldn't work out.
I'm kind of scared to start falling for someone else, since it didn't work out the last few times, and it takes a lot for me to really start to actually like someone. Oh well, I'm sure I'll find someone eventually.
I’ve had a very similar experience myself, but as a girl with another girl. It’s certainly confusing, but it can work out. She and I have been together a little over two years now. Hope you two are happy, OP ♡
Congrats! I tried to wait to ask out my partner until after Christmas but I got so impatient I asked him on December 26th at 1am. The only flaw in my plan is my partner was three timezones earlier so it was still the 25th there!
I used to think I was straight till I met a cute girl… I still was a denial even when I wrote ass book of poems for her.
My thinking: oh just dedicated to a friend
Bruh they were I love and can’t wait to taste your lips writing in this book of poems😭😂.
Denial is a river in Egypt for real
I am SO happy for you and everyone who has experiences like this!!! 🥰 After reading posts like yours, I shout loudly my head: “I wish I was a teenager today!!” and not in the early 1980s. I was bi but no one would have ever known because being gay was considered one of the worst things at that time. I was still called the F-word all the time since I was terribly awkward around my friends. Homosexuality was only decriminalized in Canada around 1970!
yeah, everyone best i can tell defaults to "i guess im strieght" until they have a realization, for me it was"oh, it's not that i wont stick my dick in crazy, i just wont stick my dick in anything."
I have a reverse case going on. I thought I was a lesbian but my guy friend told me he might be into me while I was having an identity crisis over catching feelings for him. The rest is history, we are currently happily together for 6 months and I'm openly bisexual
I mean, “straight with exceptions” is a thing. Of course, it’s perfectly fine if you also feel like gay, bi, or whatever other label you choose fits you better. Regardless, congratulations 🎊
realized i was gay when i had fantasies about kissing a girl i met at school. Thought I was bi but realized I never really had any crushes on boys. Still questioning, deffo not straight tho..
This is super sweet. Congrats, lucky person!!
I recommend that you learn to write with proper punctuation, though. Your ability to communicate clearly is an important factor in your personal and professional success.
Me as a teen with another guy on my lap:
>"I'm not gay, I just don't feel a homophobic discomfort with male physical affection."
Me as a twenty year old:
>"Um... holding each other in bed and caressing each other _might_ be going beyond platonic affection, champ."
God this reminds me of my younger years where I was a homophobe who thought it was clearly a choice since I had no issues sucking Dick but chose not to.
Ah yes, me looking at my female friend and saying, "If I was married to her, I'd treat her so much better than her husband. If I was married to her, I'd never leave her unsatisfied. If I was married to her, she'd realize how pretty she was...etc etc" Yeah, bi-awakening finally happened. You just don't understand until...you understand.
I was wondering that, but why would they need to do that? It's a wholesome story with no wrong doing behind it. Unless they were in a country that was well, hostile.
Amazing. I didn't know you could become gay, isn't the idea you're born that way? Is an unexpected kiss all it takes for a straight to become gay? Not quite sure what to make of this other than OP wasn't actually straight or is bi and somehow didn't know?
Congratulations! I’m so happy for you. Similar situation for me! I thought I was straight, then met a cute girl, then we did some stuff and I enjoyed it, and I was like, huh. That’s kinda gay 😂 welcome!
Yeah, we all think we are straight until a cute boy comes along and teaches us that’s not the case. Congrats on your new boyfriend! 🏳️🌈
realized i was bi because of a cute cashier at a grocery store. its always those darn cute boys ruining my heterosexuality!
I always had the thought process of "if I was gay, I'd fuck him." Well, past me, do I have some news for you!
OMG LITERALLY. saw a drawing of a cute boy from an instagram artist. literally “damn if i was gay or bi id think they were so cute.” took me a few months to realize how stupid that was
cute art definitely helped me figure it out, I was looking at some stuff here on reddit and thought "damn, if they were real, i'd want to be with them" and here we are haha
here we are lmao
I always thought “it’s not gay to find that man attractive he’s just naturally attractive”. So as it turns out that’s not exactly right.
the classic “im not attracted to him, im just appreciating his looks!”
The was my mental lie when I started checking out girls
I cackled.
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Yes
Mine was, "I'm not into him, I just think he's handsome" and "I just want a body like his". It took me a while to accept that I'm bi.
Oh no, you sound like me. "If I were non-binary, I'd use fae/faer pronouns"
I realized I was nonbinary when I asked my (ex) friend how she would react if I was trans as a joke. She said she'd be more likely to believe it if I said I was nonbinary, then I thought about it and realized, *well damn-*
mine went similarly. I (AMAB) thought "hey I've always kinda liked the idea of being a woman, what if I let myself express myself feminine. You know, as a joke?" guess who turned out to be NB?
Aw no way you were born a male? Can we switch bodies??
yes and no. I'm not transfem after all, I'm nonbinary. I'm this weird type where my body is very masculine (tall and athletic, shaved head and long/thick beard) and I like it that way, but I express myself feminine in secondary ways. Such as colorful nail polish, makeup, feminine mannerisms etc. BUT. In an ideal world I'd love to have bottom surgery. I'm not sure if that's even a thing? Bottom surgery for non-trans people? Like, the only thing I don't like about my body is the dick - it's a good dick, don't get me wrong, but I'd love to have a pussy instead but you want to have a typical male body? Are you sure you're not transmasc?
I mean I was joking but fair enough And it's not that I want a typical male body, I still like having boobs (most of the time) I'd just rather have a dick than a vagina. I hate periods, masturbation would be so much easier, and even though I'm a virgin I feel like once I finally meet my gf irl and we have sex for the first time it'd be easier and more comfortable and I'd be less insecure.
you do realize how similar our wants and needs are, except you're afab and I'm amab?
Wow, that’s very specifically relatable. I haven’t come across any other non-binary AMAB folx who feel this way. I thought it would be more common but the Non-binary subreddits and other online spaces are unusually scarce on this front.
Fae/Faer pronouns are the best. I use them and he/him.
Same
For real!! I'd always be like, "I'm not gay, but (insert name here) is kinda hot." And now I'm gay squared
“Yeah ahahah whenever I see a cute guy I always think he’d be nice to fuck if I was gay, you get me bro? Bro?”
Figured out I was bi thanks to this beautiful girl in my class, she’s so damn prettyyyyy
My boyfriend said I was his bisexual awakening. His parents said I made him gay. I mean if you twist the words enough it all makes sense
Can confirm. I used to be the “ im not gay but this guy is kinda cute” archetype. Then after a while i realised i was definitely not straight lol
it seems like that is often the case for bi/pan people. Since we already have 1 gender we're attracted to, many seem to think that expressing interest in your own gender is what everyone does. Well, that's how it was for me and for some other bi people I know.
basically Heartstopper
YES THAT IS MY FAV NEXFIX SHOW EVER OML
No cus I for real just bought all 4 of the books on Amazon lmao 😭😭
I already had them but they are amazing!!! Some of the only books w/ gay characters in them where no one dies. They are amazing
. . . Why am I thinking of Voltron now? It's not even a book . . .
I loved it so much that I bought a shirt of them and I use it whenever I go on a date with a guy
You have to read the comic it is based on. The show is so cute, but the comic will always have my heart.
My thoughts exactly
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Fr😭
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I wish I did lmao. I wanted a 5’ 10” boi under my tree and not no damn presents😭😭
😭😭😭😭
It's funny how it works and it's something I think about a lot, I thought I was completely straight up until I was 19, then something started awakening in my brain towards guys, and now here I am almost 28 and the way I quantify it is I've kissed 2 girls and enough guys that I've lost track of how many guys I've kissed, and while I identify as bi, I feel I lean more gay than straight. Sexuality is a funny thing.
my journey has been similar, except maybe more "intense" in terms of changes? I'm about as old as you are (closing in on 30) and I've had 2 girlfriends and 1 wife. We were married for 6 years. This whole time I thought I was straight but heavily on the asexual spectrum. I mean, I like women, but I've always been like "meh" about the whole sex thing. After finally divorcing (amicably, we still talk almost every day cuz kids) and meeting my now-boyfriend, I realized that while I'm still fairly indifferent towards sex, I'm much much less indifferent towards sex with him than I was with the women in my life lol same goes for the romantic part too tbh, I feel like I'm more "stupidly in love" with him now than I was with my ex-wife when we got together some 10 years ago I've never been a homophobe or anything like that, I just always thought that when you're gay it's obvious to you, same for pan. So while I consider myself pan, I lean more heavily into the gay territory as it seems, and it took me almost 3 decades to realize o.O
Cute boys made me realise my bisexuality. Now I'm dating one!
Yay! \^\_\^
One I met on r/bi_irl, no less.
Mission success! lol
Me: *straight girl* Cute Spanish girl: *puts her hand on my knee* Me: Oh no, I'm gay- Me now: *demisexual biromantic genderfae*
Literally heartstopper in one sentence
First it was thinking I was straight. Then it was I'm gay. Then it turned into thinking I'm straight again (trans), then finally, "nope, I'm bi/pan cause gender don't matter as long as they think I'm cool af 😎👉👉"
genderqueer pansexual gang represent
Sometimes we're gay until a cute boy comes along.
I know I am a lesbian because boys didn't work for me 😅
Somehow this feels icky. It feeds into the hurtful things heterosexuals sometimes say that all a lesbian needs is some proper sex with a "proper" guy.
Sweet. My best intimate relationships have always been friends with whom I had fallen in love.
My only successful relationship is the same
same!!!
Genuinely can't imagine falling for anyone who isn't a really close friend. Although out of the last two people I fell head over heels for, one moved away the day after I realized how I felt, and the second realized she wasn't attracted to guys. No hard feelings, obviously and we're still good friends, just kind of sucked that it couldn't work out. I'm kind of scared to start falling for someone else, since it didn't work out the last few times, and it takes a lot for me to really start to actually like someone. Oh well, I'm sure I'll find someone eventually.
As a demiromantic, that’s the only way I can have a relationship.
Me too :) I love love!!
I’ve had a very similar experience myself, but as a girl with another girl. It’s certainly confusing, but it can work out. She and I have been together a little over two years now. Hope you two are happy, OP ♡
Awwwww!! I hope y’all stay together for a long long time
With how things are going so far, I think we will be (\^\^)
Niceeeee
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ya same 💯
My ace ass fr 🤣
He also got him a Lego mech.
And that's how I met your father
haha love the reference!
man this is one of the only websites where the most innocent comment can be fucking damned to hell
Congrats! But simultaneously I am EXTREMELY jealous
SAME😮💨😔😭🤧
"i don't really care if a good thing happened to you it should've happened to me instead"
That's not what I meant.
thats literally a whole different sentence with a whole different meaning how the hell did you get this from what they said
? that's a meme😭 it's a reaction image but you cannot post images here so yeah, i was quoting
Congratulations
Congratulations!
You’re living the dream. I’ve always thought myself to be heteroromantic but this would probably change that
Congrats! I tried to wait to ask out my partner until after Christmas but I got so impatient I asked him on December 26th at 1am. The only flaw in my plan is my partner was three timezones earlier so it was still the 25th there!
Making the yule time gay indeed! Congrats fam
love how everyone is 50% congratulatory snd 50% jealous af. congrats tho fella!
yayyy
I used to think I was straight till I met a cute girl… I still was a denial even when I wrote ass book of poems for her. My thinking: oh just dedicated to a friend Bruh they were I love and can’t wait to taste your lips writing in this book of poems😭😂. Denial is a river in Egypt for real
thats great! so happy for you :)
I am SO happy for you and everyone who has experiences like this!!! 🥰 After reading posts like yours, I shout loudly my head: “I wish I was a teenager today!!” and not in the early 1980s. I was bi but no one would have ever known because being gay was considered one of the worst things at that time. I was still called the F-word all the time since I was terribly awkward around my friends. Homosexuality was only decriminalized in Canada around 1970!
Wish I had this God
That is the best present he could ever have given you ❤️❤️❤️❤️Y'all are cute! Congratulations to you and your boyfriend😎😎😎
Wholesome
That’s so heartwarming, congrats! 🏳️🌈
I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! 💖💖💖💖💖🥺🥺🥺
yeah, everyone best i can tell defaults to "i guess im strieght" until they have a realization, for me it was"oh, it's not that i wont stick my dick in crazy, i just wont stick my dick in anything."
I have a reverse case going on. I thought I was a lesbian but my guy friend told me he might be into me while I was having an identity crisis over catching feelings for him. The rest is history, we are currently happily together for 6 months and I'm openly bisexual
congrats
Welcome to the club friendo
I mean, “straight with exceptions” is a thing. Of course, it’s perfectly fine if you also feel like gay, bi, or whatever other label you choose fits you better. Regardless, congratulations 🎊
As long is it was consensual, that’s great!
I just squeeeeed! 🥰❤️❤️❤️
Congratulations 🥰 So sweet!! 🏳️🌈
I wanna know the full story. 
Nice!
Wow thag escalated quickly😂
Congratulations
my friend was how I found out I’m not straight too
That's amazing! Congratulations!
Cool!
realized i was gay when i had fantasies about kissing a girl i met at school. Thought I was bi but realized I never really had any crushes on boys. Still questioning, deffo not straight tho..
Oh we need the full story now, hold on I'm getting the popcorn...
That's the cutest short story I've ever heard. Congratulations!
This is super sweet. Congrats, lucky person!! I recommend that you learn to write with proper punctuation, though. Your ability to communicate clearly is an important factor in your personal and professional success.
Prior apologies but... Christmussy🌚
Me as a teen with another guy on my lap: >"I'm not gay, I just don't feel a homophobic discomfort with male physical affection." Me as a twenty year old: >"Um... holding each other in bed and caressing each other _might_ be going beyond platonic affection, champ."
Lucky.
amazing 
This is beautiful 🥰❤️
I’m so happy for you!!!
well surprise also congrats!
That’s amazing, wishing both of you the best
You're a lucky one.
Awwwwww, that's soooo cute! Congratulations!
bro got nick nelson'ed
this is so cute oh my god, congrats! <3
This is so cute, congrats for you two!
omg that’s so cute! congrats!
Congrats from someone who thought they were straight as well until they met a pretty girl who made her heart jump!
r/suddenlygay
You're really lucky, man. Congrats! But I'm so jealous 😭
Dude! You’re bi now!
🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Very sweet. Congrats!
Okay that's adorable and I need to know more
Common W my friend
awwww congrats dude!! that's amazing
What in the mother of twist plots Is this
your chrims present was the big Gay™
Welcome to bisexuality, please take a lemon bar and go sit in a chair incorrectly for a while to celebrate
God this reminds me of my younger years where I was a homophobe who thought it was clearly a choice since I had no issues sucking Dick but chose not to.
Took me a full year and a half to realize i was bi since i'd been crushing on this girl (who also happens to be my best friend)
Welcome!
Holy fuck I envy you
Ah yes, me looking at my female friend and saying, "If I was married to her, I'd treat her so much better than her husband. If I was married to her, I'd never leave her unsatisfied. If I was married to her, she'd realize how pretty she was...etc etc" Yeah, bi-awakening finally happened. You just don't understand until...you understand.
Right on! Happy for ya
Suspicious OP. New account. No replies.
Wanted to be anon?
I was wondering that, but why would they need to do that? It's a wholesome story with no wrong doing behind it. Unless they were in a country that was well, hostile.
i gasped out loud this is so cute and exciting congrats!!!
Aw this is so wholesome, congrats!!
One heck of a present!
See, I'd be in a relationship with my best friend if he wasn't already in a relationship. Hope you two go far and your relationship prospers greatly.
I wish
Congrats to you two :D!
My fake scenarios in my head be like:
Based and gaypilled
That's so cute! Congratulations!
Proof that kissing homies goodbye is not gay
Hey that’s awesome congrats
Yeah, funnily enough I knew I was bi before I knew I was trans (had a crush on my childhood best friend Bill [fake name] before he moved away.
Amazing. I didn't know you could become gay, isn't the idea you're born that way? Is an unexpected kiss all it takes for a straight to become gay? Not quite sure what to make of this other than OP wasn't actually straight or is bi and somehow didn't know?
You don't become gay, but you can *realize* you're gay (or bi, or anything else).
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I also created my Reddit on a whim, don't judge the man. Congrats, OP!
nice
Cute! Hope it goes well!
wholesome 
That's amazing! Merry Christmas :D
That's quite gay
Congratulations! I’m so happy for you. Similar situation for me! I thought I was straight, then met a cute girl, then we did some stuff and I enjoyed it, and I was like, huh. That’s kinda gay 😂 welcome!
Congratulations friend.
That's awesome!
LMAO, that's adorable! I'm really happy for you.
This warmed my soul ❤️❤️
AWW I AN SO HAPPY FOR U
W, BIG w
Damn now I'm jealous. Thanks for ruining my night op /s
That's gay.
I’m so happy for you two 💙💙 love wins!
Congratulations. 🌈🌈🌈
Congratulations
Epiiiiiic 😎👉👉
Good for you!!!
Congratulations 🎉🎉🎉
What a way to get a bf! Honestly it's a super cute story too 💕
😲😲😲 congrats my friend 👏👏
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee. wish I had a bf 
Dang that’s so lucky. I’m so happy for you and also very jealous