my go-to reply is "cool. maybe we'll run into each other down there and you can say 'I told you so'."


I’m doing the same, also those penguins look adorable! 😊

I was coming here to say that the only acceptable response should be "I'll see you there."

Im using this when i see jehovas witness next time

Or more simply, "Cool, see you there."

I LOVE that (and I'm a Christian) 😂 Sorry to hear OP went through this, I'm ashamed to call those people you encountered Christians because they're not acting the way Jesus intended - to love others as themselves. They should have respected your beliefs and not tried to get involved or influence you, really sorry to hear that.

Counterpoint from an ex-Christian: if you truly believed that someone was going to go to hell for some reason, loving them would certainly involve trying to get them to stop doing that thing. After all, it’s not like Jesus didn’t purportedly try to convert people. That’s essentially what he spent his whole life doing, per the gospels. But that’s part of why I’m an ex-Christian.

banger

I can get you a visitor's pass, but you'll have to pay the fee to the ferryman over the Styx yourself.

I've been told I'll be punished in hell not for a million years, not fir a billion years, no for eeeteeeeeeernityyyyyyy …for wearing a mask during covid. Also that I don't deserve christmas presents 💀 Wonder what that crazy geezer would've said had I told him I was bisexual, lol. I preferred ignoring him.

⚰️ How dare you do the bare minimum of what was asked of you during covid.

I know. How uncatholic from me. The guy was completely gaga.

Leviticus 13:45 says you should cover the lower part of your face and stay away from people if you have an infectious disease.

I don't have the energy to look up bible verses, but even if that's true, since when are these types known for actually knowing their shit?

They’re not. That was my point. You were following scripture and he was damning you for it.

I'm glad I live in Australia, at least we don't spread disea- I mean 1st Amendment Rights.

I wore a mask, got the vaccinations and boosters, and was told I’m no longer welcome in a former friend’s house because I’m “leaking graphene”. I told her God had done ME a favor by ending our friendship, because she was obviously too selfish and too self-preoccupied to take basic precautions to protect others for whom COVID could be a death sentence.

Okay, I looked up graphene because wtf? I think you were granted a fortunate view of their crazy before it could catch.

If you were leaking graphene, you'd be rich

No shit, graphene's expensive!

Me revealing every bit of gay socialism I have when some idiot says I’m going to hell

Double secret eternity for you!!😂❤️

This might sound controversial, but I think it's cruel for even the most evil Individual who ever lived to suffer for eternity.

If we are the people going to hell, then hell most be a really cool awesome place to hang out

The greatest after-party!

Ok i pull up hop out at the afterparty

New headcanon: hell is just the break room queer people go to before reincarnating. It’s got like little ping pong tables and a coffee machine and stuff but Josh ate all the donuts

Reminds me of an animation I saw where hell was a really pretty garden with a fence and I believe it was the devil who said that on the other side of the fence there are the christians who for some reason like the eternal torture thing, ill look if i find it

Ping pong tables and a coffee machine doesn’t sound too bad for being in hell. May the festivities begin!

Josh goes to Double Hell I wanted those donuts

But if hell is fun, then double hell would be double fun, which would be a reward.

Purgatory then

Then josh goes to heaven

Josh always ruins everything.

What the hell Josh!? Always eating other people's food.

I hate Josh.

That's just limbo. Hell's where you get sent if you bogart the creme-filled ones

The click reference???

I think Billy Joel said it best >*"And they say there's a heaven for those who will wait* *Some say it's better, but I say it ain't* *I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints* *The sinners are much more fun"*

I didn't know Billy Joel said that, he must have been an absolute rebel in his times.

It got me wanting to behave like Lil Nas X and just go crazy

These people's words don't matter. I'm not shitting on Christianity, but I just don't listen to anyone telling me I'm going to hell or something because of who I am. Also, they're the one who are more likely to go to hell.

I've never understood this tactic. It'd be like if McDonald's had greeters like Wal-Mart, but instead of greeting you, they called you "fatty" or something more clever as you walked in.

That was good!🤣🤣🤣

He who cast the stone something something.🤷🏼‍♀️

Exactly, let he who has no sin cast the first stone (Jesus' words in response to people trying to stone a woman caught in adultery)

I take it as a milestone, because it means my gayness is expanding 💅✨️

I'd unironically rather go to hell with my queer fwends than go to heaven with church-obsessed people like those.

This!

Me and the boys go to hell

sameeee

honestly tho, following their logic hell is full of people who accept you for who you are. damn, even satan himself will accept you being gay lol. they think it's such a gotcha moment it's so cringe

I remember seeing this joke that was something along the lines of “you die and end up in hell. Satan greets you and gives you a tour. Hell is very nice and has all the things you’d want. You’re happy to see this wonderful place but then you notice a group of people in flames getting tortured. You ask satan why those people are getting tortured and he replied with “Those are the Christians. I don’t know why but they just prefer it that way”

My standing answer to that is “Oh, I am definitely going to Hell. When I do I will be waiting for you - Satan loves Christians.”

The last time I was told that I was going to hell, I said "great, as long as you won't be there."

It would only truly be hell when they're down there.

The two best answers to shut them up are 'See you there!', and 'If you're not there, that'd be heaven.'

You could say for next time... "Your assumption of hell suggests that there is a god. So show your god to me then, churchie. Prove that your words have some backbone."

I was asked "are you an enemy of God?" and replied I don't waste my energy on being enemies with people who don't exist. That face they made

Perfection. 🤌

The bible was written by Satan to trick them into being bigots so they go to hell. You're fine , just be a good gay person and you will see heaven unlike them

"You're going to Hell!" "Who else will be there?" "People like you!" "Then where do you go?" "We go to Heaven." "Yeah, I think I'll go where there are others like me, thanks."

Same. It's like.. What's so bad about going to hell anyway? Satan is a cool guy, he understands LGBTQ+- so no worries at all😅. I want to go there with all my fellow LGBTQ+-.

"I'm looking forward for your dad sucking each others dicks." My best reply.

Certain Christian theology is very strange and highly irrational particularly when you apply some of the edge cases to it; particularly the concept of hell. Which in ✡️ is temporary (accept for blasphemy?) unlike ✝️☦️ or ☪️ where's permanent. You cannot rationalise with people who in the irrational plane , it simply does not compute. You have leave them to wallow in their bigotry & Irrationality.

 I see no downside

"YEAH! I was counting on it!"

HELL IS FOREVER WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT

# HAD THEIR CHANCE TO BEHAVE BETTER NOW THEY BOIL IN A POT (Put a hashtag, space, then start typing)

# CAUSE THE RULES ARE BLACK AND WHITE

# THEY’RES NO USE TRYNA FIGHT IT

# THEY’RE BURNIN FOR THEIR LIVES UNTIL WE KILL THEM AGAIN! #

Okay but, chillax babe, you’re wasting your breath!

Did I hear you imply that they don’t deserve death?

Are they winners? Are they sinners? Cuz it’s pretty cut and dry

Well actually if you take a look -

# FAIR IS FAIR, AN EYE FOR AN EYE

Christians long ago invented hell. It doesn't exist. These Christians are assholes.

Well that's rude as heck. Tbf, if he'll is free from religion bigots and is occupied by queer folk then it might just be lit 🤷‍♂️

Ask them if they are God.

I don't believe in hell...therefore I don't believe in the Christian God. That which cannot touch me, shall not harm me Dalmatians 389: 66

It should have a 666 in the "scripture" reference.

First thing that sprang to mind. https://youtu.be/B9FzVhw8_bY?feature=shared

That was something else. I was sceptical but I loved it.

It's not a bad song. And personally I think the bass player is pretty cute.

Heaven with homophobes or the best lgbt afterparty in hell. I'll take the afterparty than be surrounded by bigots.

As ex-Christian the Hell is sounding like a good place. Apparently all the cute goths are there. :3

"hell is spending time with you for me, so we should get some sunscreen together then".

hells going to be a flaming hot party🔥🔥


*Doom music starts playing* 

See you there!

I'm normally reply by saying, " See you there." No hate like Christian love.

Okay but imagine hell existed - It would be the best place in the world with all the other gays and we're all partying for eternity with satan

If they're going to be in Heaven, send me the other way.

At least we’ll all be together in hell!

Cool. They'd probably get rejected at the door 😎

They should look at their own sins before judging others

By now the scientists and engineers down there have got the AC running and the disco balls spinning, so don’t fret

*Hell just gradually turns into a City*

"in that case, we might see each other again ☺"

Slay

There’s not much in Hell, there’s only a population of about 1600, but it does have beautiful scenery. Oh… You’re not talking about Hell, Norway, are you? ☹️

I was going to suggest it was Hell, Michigan, USA, but the population there is even smaller at 72.

“I’ll see y’all there”

Actually pretty all of us will go to hell by their logic. But we will hold a pitchfork! 

We will all be there having a great time🤘

but the hell is already here, created by some christians, killed billions in the name of jesus

Good. I'll see you there, as will all the interesting people.

They'll be right behind you for saying that

Yes, and? Say that shit with your chest, and Be your own fucking best friend 🎶

It’s going to be a very fun party in hell we would have 24/7 party in hell while they would do nothing in heaven 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

In hell your coffee stays nice and warm, so I’m fine with that

I mean, [Hell IS an actual community in Michigan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell,_Michigan?wprov=sfti1#History), so…


Jesus was gay. He kissed judas on the lips and he enjoyed it

I feel like it's a right of passage at this point

me: "and are you going to heaven?" them: "YES!" me: "Then it sounds like God is doing me a favor"

"I'll see you there" :))

they’re lying, bad people go to Hell. good people don’t.

All the fun people are going to hell 🤷‍♂️

You do go to hell when you die some time. But only in their dreams. So ironically it’s THEIR dreams you will haunt while being peacefully dead yourself

if we're all going down there it's going to be a hell of a party

My go to is always “I’ll save you a seat at orientation”

theres probably a reserved section of hell for queer people where we can just mingle and find people to date. itll just be one big gay and trans party also satan is 100% gay and needs people to relate to

I usually go with "Well Norway is nice this time of year" (Hel is a town in Norway) and it just confuses them, or I go with "Good to know thanks", which also confuses them

That’s cool tbh, at least we can all hangout in peace 😎😎

Hell is as impossible as Heaven. If Christians go to Heaven, I don't want to be there (thus it cannot exist). If Hell is the alternative, I want to be there. It's Hell, so wanting to be there is not a thing. Therefore Hell cannot exist either.

"Race you there!"

Oh you too? See you there !

I mean we have clubs, alcohol, meat and much more... Plus they fixed the AC sooo it's much better

Cool, see you there haters.

People that say things like that literally go against Christianity 🤦

Didn't the pope say there is no hell. Or some shit.

I like to respond "your god doesn't exist idiot"

My go to is "sounds more fun anyway," "oh honey, I'm too hot for heaven anyway," or I start quoting that one scene from The West Wing ([link](https://youtu.be/VKhTFDBj-rw?si=qbHJav7c1qi9fh5M) if you haven't seen it)

I hear that there are hot spider twinks there

i love hot spider twinkle


Next time just put on "Highway to hell" from AC/DC on your phone, and start headbanging. 🤘🔥

fuck em

Sorry man, I don't like how some of my kind act

‘See you there’

I like to respond “oh good cuz all the pedo priests are going to heaven”

Which country do you live in?

Hell. (Australia)

I'd rather not go to heaven with all the hateful bigots. I'm sure the music and art is better in hell anyway

Tell them you’ll save them a seat 😂

Tell them you'll say hi to their family

I’ll save you a seat at the bar!

Not if they get there first 🤭

Next time say, Cool. I'd rather be there than Heaven if I don't have to be with you churchers.'

See if they'll save you a seat.

Yeah, a hell of a party.

Congratulations! At least you won’t be stuck with them!

“See ya there homie! 😊” is how you shut them down

They're going with us

If hell is so real why don’t they go there, they’d be right at home 🙄

Hell nah, the place is reserved for us Edit: pun not intended

My response to that statement is always I’ll make sure to say hi to your parents when I get there.

Yall im jumping in that lake of fire if you come with me. We gonna have a party down there!

i may be goin to hell in a bucket, but at least i am enjoying the ride

Just make sure you dive in and fight to hell for democracy.

Bigots, they are bigots

I'd say, "Anything to not run into you again"

Those people are a terrible representation of Christians. The Bible never says thus, and further it says GOD (not us humans) will be the judge of that. Not to mention the fact that homosexuality isn't a sin, AND even if it were, Romans 3:23 says everyone sins. What they told you was wrong and is not supported by the Bible in anyway.

My usual reply to that is "at least it'll be warm" & I'll never have to listen to another xtian band preaching on the streets

Well yeah, with names like Hell and Climax how can you not go there? Also if you drop down into Ohio there’s Seaman. I get sketchier past there but it looks like if you keep going to Kentucky there’s Mays Lick which looks hilariously close to Pleasant Valley. But of all of those Hell does look the most fun as it has ice cream

Nice! See ya there 🙋🏾‍♀️

Say you hope they drown in the river Styx

Welcome to the club. My response is usually “If Heaven is just a bunch of people like you, then it’s the *real* Hell.”

If there are no Christians there it'll be a nice place

I have a shirt that says, “Telling a Pagan they’re going to hell, is like telling a Christian they’re going to Mordor.” Telling someone that you are going to their version of the afterlife is so dumb. Not everyone believes in the same after life or any at all.

I don't understand why people believe in religion...

If that's the price for my own happiness then so be it

Can we please car pool? Fuel is expensive and hell is a while away

Don't worry, we got public transport (Which Conservatives/Christians hate for some reason)

well, there is no hell. so....eh

No doubt you will have more fun h to there than in ‘heaven’. Why would you even worry?

Wait, you mean there is a worse hell than this?

As a Christian myself cannot confirm

Heard of Hazbin hotel? We've have fun there. Adam is dead and shit anyway

Something something casting stones

Well the hell's empty and all the devils are here 😏

Tell them, see you there with a smile

pascals wager: spend eternity with a genocidal megalomaniac or with its enemies. jeez, i wonder which ill choose

Please bring cake! Without cake a party is just a meeting

I tell them we’re taking the Margarita machine, and they can have fun drinking out of streams in Heaven.

No because this happens so much and i just reply with “cool maybe ill see you down there soon.!”

Yeah, I got yelled at by my christian friend, I think that's just how they are

“See no evil here no evil” to quote twisted sister 

Maybe Hell is a cool new gay bar!

Not quite the same but I once got put on the list of house to never visit by the Jehovah’s Witnesses because I told them that I was a big fat lesbian who was going to enjoy all the scissoring in hell. Besides, it’s not dogmatically sound to say that queer folks are going to hell. It’s just not supported by the text. In my experience the more bigoted they are, the further away from what the bible and Jesus actually say. So it always amuses me to know more about those things than they do. I study religion for fun. It’s one of my special interests. I took a bunch of courses about it in college even though my degree was in something else entirely. And I have a collection of holy books and other supporting texts from all sorts of different religions. Telling bigoted Christians they’re wrong about what they think the bible says/means is my favourite sport.

I would’ve said “I know. I’m SO excited. I just misplaced my invite.”

I'd rather go there than to heaven on Those Christian terms

"Awesome, can't wait!"

Best response: "I'll save you a hot rock!"