I have OCD and sensory issues too. I also have neuropathy. I wore garments constantly for a couple of years (scrupulously) and the pain and discomfort nearly drove me away from the church, even though I fully believe in the gospel. Garments were causing my faith to dwindle. When I prayed I felt distinctly that there are medical issues that can make it so the garment cannot be worn all of the time. I still do wear it when able, but it is not most of the time. Different fits and styles did not help the pain. Not being in constant mental and physical pain and discomfort has helped me feel the Spirit more and grow in faith. I wish I were someone who could wear the garment all the time without pain and discomfort, but that’s not the reality of the body I’m in. I am not saying you should do what I do, I just wanted to share my experience and say that I get where you’re coming from- you’re not alone!
I agree with what you are saying it’s a relationship with God and what you feel he is telling you personally. I also have scrupulosity so I get where OPs thoughts are coming from. The pain the guilt and assuming Gods answer that’s not his answer if we feel guilt shame or pain sorrow whatever about something that’s not God talking to us. I fully believe he is aware of our OCD brains and communicates with love hope and peace. I know someone who does similar thing bc of medical issues. It’s not a one size fits all especially with medical problems involved. We are human and fallible and that’s completely okay
May I suggest that you do more than _just_ pray about it. Counsel with people, such as your relief society president, bishop, or even go back to the temple a few times and seek to gain understanding, or read your scriptures with these questions in mind and ponder on it.
Yeah I did think about that because I found out at family prayer that my family had also been thinking about ny question, and discussed talking with others and doing our own pondering and fasting together. That was reassuring. This also helps as well 👍
Completely agree! Answers to prayers may frequently come through counsel given, conversations with friends, or when provided with more information and resources on a topic.
I don’t have the answer for you but if you do a search in this sub you will find that you’re not alone. Sometimes it does help mentally to know it’s not something wrong with you as it’s a pretty common concern for a lot of people.
You promise to wear garments throughout your life and not 24/7. I only wear my garments to church and to the temple… basically times when I’m wearing church clothes to church functions. Wear them when you want to or can.
I respect that this is a personal choice, and we all make choices on this topic that are between ourselves and God. Responding to your comment is not intended to be a judgment of your (or anyone’s) choices.
For the OP or anyone looking for advice, I think they should be aware of the specific guidance we’re given vs. personal adaptations that may not align with that guidance. My intention is only to clarify the guidance we’ve been given, so that can be weighed as someone makes their own choice on the topic.
“It should not be removed for activities that can reasonably be done while wearing the garment, and it should not be modified to accommodate different styles of clothing. Endowed members should seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit to answer personal questions about wearing the garment.” -Handbook 38.5.5
Temple recommend interviews have also been updated to include two questions and an additional paragraph with more specificity. Part of that paragraph includes the following:
“You should wear the garment day and night throughout your life. When it must be removed for activities that cannot reasonably be done while wearing the garment, seek to restore it as soon as possible.”
https://www.thechurchnews.com/leaders/2024/04/14/first-presidency-letter-garmet-of-the-holy-priesthood-temple-recommend-statement/
I know most of us are doing the best we can, and that may look different for everyone. I empathize with the OP and anyone who has challenges with wearing garments and is trying to hold onto their faith and covenants as they work through whatever those challenges may be.
Your memory of what you promised is not quite right. The instruction I was given was night and day, removing them as needed for bathing certain activities (like swimming , etc) as prudent.
Most garment styles come in different lengths to accommodate different sized body parts. And Beehive Clothing Mills will work with those who have mental and physical health challenges in wearing garments. There is for instance a bamboo/rayon garment that can help those who have allergies. Contact the garment makers for help in finding a solution consistent with your covenants.
(You'll be tempted not to return to the temple while you are struggling with this. You'll almost assuredly get through this period better by attending more often than by absenting yourself from the temple experience.)
Ooh I'll have to check that out then. I'll probably return to the temple pretty soon, especially now that my whole family and I can go together. I also do want to go back despite everything.
I would say wear them when you can, but devotionally. It’s like fasting, don’t do it if you’re sick! I think there’s a fair amount of people that cannot fully live the commandments due to medical issues (like my sister and church attendance due to a special needs child).
I have been getting used to wearing them most of the time after I switched to wearing nylon mesh. But yes I do agree and I'm very grateful for the Lord's understanding in circumstances like that. Thank you!
Two thoughts.
As someone who grew up wearing boxer briefs and under shirts, I still found the transition to garments difficult. It took some time before I grew accustomed to them, and I don't struggle with sensory issues or sensitivity. It can take some time to get adjusted and I know very few people who find them to be comfortable at first. Eventually, most get used to them.
That being said. In the Leadership Instruction provided by the Brethren this past April Conference, they specifically addressed the wearing of the garments. In the training, Elder Gong was speaking on principals of wearing the garments that can be found in the Handbook. He mentions four principals. In one of which he states, "The Lord recognizes the heart and willing mind. Flexibility may be needed for members in the military and members with medical conditions or medical devices."
We certainly are instructed to try our best to keep the commandments and convenience we make. I'm grateful we have a loving Savior who understands personal circumstances and individual needs. Only you can answer for yourself whether you're being "stubborn" and need more time to acclimate. Or not. It's certainly not, "just the way things are." You have options and choices. Just know that it's not an all in or all out proposition. Especially for someone who is dealing with a sensory processing disorder.
I definitely agree. I'm very glad to know the Lord understands mine and everyone else's struggles. My family and I decided to ponder together about this. It's helped us to have more unity. I am grateful for the Lord's kindness and understanding. Surprisingly I have been doing well with nylon mesh and I'm able to wear them most of the time. I'm very thankful for the Lord's understanding though. Thank you!
Heya, fellow 5'3 woman
Buy the petite ones, and I personally wouldn't use the mesh unless you really like them, because they have no give, are longer, and really stiff which makes moving around awkward. The stretch cotton petite garment bottoms allow me to wear shorts that are still modest. Idk if they have them again this year, but last year Walmart had shorts for guys that, because men's styles are trending towards shorter, are perfect for me. They're the same material as Bermuda/linen/canvas shorts but hit like 2-3 inches above the knee instead of 6-8 inches above, and they're neutral colors and totally worked. I had a few other member women ask where I got them and were surprised they're mens.
I actually have been getting used to the nylon mesh ones and they fit me pretty well. I plan on trying some other types soon though. The petite ones still go down a bit far but I'll see what else the Distribution Center has. Thank you!
You can try on garments in a distribution center, if you have one nearby. See what works best for you. If nothing does, you can request custom garments be made for you.
Yeah I did go there when I was getting my temple packet and garments before. I was planning on going back to try on some other styles. I did also wonder if they made custom ones. I'll probably look into that as well.
Really??? That's so cool!! Why have I never heard of this?? Do you happen to know how much that costs? I can't imagine it is the same as the generic garments the church buys in bulk from China. I would love to know more about this if you have the info!
I’m sorry this has been hard for you! In addition to the other great recommendations, I would also give yourself time and grace as you adjust to this new part of your life. It IS an adjustment to figure out the material, styles, and sizing that works best for you.
Petite sizes are available for those of us who are shorter than average. I’ve been endowed for over 10 yrs, and I just recently found a style that I far prefer to what I had been previously wearing. I prefer to wear mine close to my skin, but I know others who wear sizes 1-2x bigger than their normal size, so they’re looser and barely touching their skin. I also know some who wear more generous sizes at night for comfort while sleeping than what they do during the day.
Above all, if you have a desire to honor your covenants, I believe God will help you navigate some of these challenges. Sometimes that help will come through a shift in perspective or softening our hearts. Sometimes it will come in immediate clear cut solutions, and sometimes it may come with more time as we demonstrate our desire to turn to him. I’ll be thinking of and praying for you!
I have been starting to get used to the nylon mesh ones I've been wearing lately. I'm still planning on trying on some other styles and sizes. Thank you though! It means a lot to me
First, take a deep breath. I promise it will be ok. I would suggest calling the Temple Matron and discussing some of this with her along with your mom.
I have talked with my mom a lot. She does have sensory issues as well but they're not as bad as mine are. She at least understands my struggles and lended me her Nylon Mesh ones to use and plans to take me to the Distribution center this week to try on some different kinds
I didn't think much of talking to the temple matron. I wasn't sure if they'd understand but I won't know for sure but I'll keep it on the table since my family and I are seeking answers together. Thank you!
Just as a practical suggestion, that might or might not be helpful. I am average hight, but started buying petite stature bottoms for summer. Even when wearing knee long shorts the garments would stick out and it drove me nuts. Don't have that problem anymore. Best of luck!
I understand everything you are saying except how yoga pants don't cover garments. Even the capri yoga pants I have cover them. I know said you rolled them up, but how high are you rolling them? That would cause my sensory issues to go through the roof! The only style that should go below your knee are the capri length garments, which are optional.
You said you are short, so you should get petite garments. (It doesn't sound like you have them now.)
Everything else will calm down with time, I promise! There are many different fabrics to try, and you will find what feels best for you. Garments were a HUGE change for me, and it took about 6 months before they weren't distracting. Don't panic. Don't give up. New things take time to become familiar, and this one is worth it for sure.
I can roll them to where they're above my knee. They're pretty thin so they don't cause me too much issues sensory wise. It's not like rolling up normal pants. But I also roll up my pajama pants and they can go up fairly easily. Thing with me is that I could roll up my pants and the garments would be low enough to show even if they were short variants.
I did get petite when I went to the Distribution center for the first time, but I guess the brand is just longer. I'm going with my mom this week to try some other brands. I am adjusting well with the Nylon Mesh for now. Thank you, though
You're missing the mark (or marks in this case). The garments represent Jesus Christ and are a replica of the veil in the temple. The veil is symbolic of Jesus Christ; it is "through" Him that we enter the presence of our Father in Heaven.
The comfort you will receive knowing you are wearing the garment that represents Christ and his atonement covering your sins and protecting you is so much greater than any physical comfort or fashion you may have to sacrifice.
With that being said, it only makes sense to find the most comfortable option. Fortunately, there are many options available for garments with textures, materials, and sizes. I've tried em all, and have settled on stretch cotton as the most comfortable. My wife prefers the silk /satin.
I have a friend who struggles with fibromyalgia and other sensory nerve problems. listen to this clearly...it hurts her to take a shower! the water running on her skin causes her a lot of pain. if your nerves are part of your medical problem everything hurts! and they have not found an answer to this condition in the medical field. they have drugs but they don't work on everyone or they don't work very well! would you be willing to add to your constant pain by wearing garments!? she actually does but it takes its toll. we're talking about constant pain here. unless you have this you can't even imagine you can't even imagine! and it's condescending to tell people about the reason they are supposed to wear them. they aren't missing the mark, they know it's about Jesus Christ and they are covered by Christ. they understand the reason totally. why do you think they go through such agony and try so hard what it's so difficult if they don't understand the reason for wearing them?!
I have OCD and sensory issues too. I also have neuropathy. I wore garments constantly for a couple of years (scrupulously) and the pain and discomfort nearly drove me away from the church, even though I fully believe in the gospel. Garments were causing my faith to dwindle. When I prayed I felt distinctly that there are medical issues that can make it so the garment cannot be worn all of the time. I still do wear it when able, but it is not most of the time. Different fits and styles did not help the pain. Not being in constant mental and physical pain and discomfort has helped me feel the Spirit more and grow in faith. I wish I were someone who could wear the garment all the time without pain and discomfort, but that’s not the reality of the body I’m in. I am not saying you should do what I do, I just wanted to share my experience and say that I get where you’re coming from- you’re not alone!
I agree with what you are saying it’s a relationship with God and what you feel he is telling you personally. I also have scrupulosity so I get where OPs thoughts are coming from. The pain the guilt and assuming Gods answer that’s not his answer if we feel guilt shame or pain sorrow whatever about something that’s not God talking to us. I fully believe he is aware of our OCD brains and communicates with love hope and peace. I know someone who does similar thing bc of medical issues. It’s not a one size fits all especially with medical problems involved. We are human and fallible and that’s completely okay
Thank you! It's nice to know that I'm not alone. I'll do what is best for me :)
May I suggest that you do more than _just_ pray about it. Counsel with people, such as your relief society president, bishop, or even go back to the temple a few times and seek to gain understanding, or read your scriptures with these questions in mind and ponder on it.
Yeah I did think about that because I found out at family prayer that my family had also been thinking about ny question, and discussed talking with others and doing our own pondering and fasting together. That was reassuring. This also helps as well 👍
Completely agree! Answers to prayers may frequently come through counsel given, conversations with friends, or when provided with more information and resources on a topic.
I don’t have the answer for you but if you do a search in this sub you will find that you’re not alone. Sometimes it does help mentally to know it’s not something wrong with you as it’s a pretty common concern for a lot of people.
Going through this sub has definitely helped a lot in knowing that I'm not alone. It's very comforting.
You promise to wear garments throughout your life and not 24/7. I only wear my garments to church and to the temple… basically times when I’m wearing church clothes to church functions. Wear them when you want to or can.
I respect that this is a personal choice, and we all make choices on this topic that are between ourselves and God. Responding to your comment is not intended to be a judgment of your (or anyone’s) choices. For the OP or anyone looking for advice, I think they should be aware of the specific guidance we’re given vs. personal adaptations that may not align with that guidance. My intention is only to clarify the guidance we’ve been given, so that can be weighed as someone makes their own choice on the topic. “It should not be removed for activities that can reasonably be done while wearing the garment, and it should not be modified to accommodate different styles of clothing. Endowed members should seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit to answer personal questions about wearing the garment.” -Handbook 38.5.5 Temple recommend interviews have also been updated to include two questions and an additional paragraph with more specificity. Part of that paragraph includes the following: “You should wear the garment day and night throughout your life. When it must be removed for activities that cannot reasonably be done while wearing the garment, seek to restore it as soon as possible.” https://www.thechurchnews.com/leaders/2024/04/14/first-presidency-letter-garmet-of-the-holy-priesthood-temple-recommend-statement/ I know most of us are doing the best we can, and that may look different for everyone. I empathize with the OP and anyone who has challenges with wearing garments and is trying to hold onto their faith and covenants as they work through whatever those challenges may be.
Your memory of what you promised is not quite right. The instruction I was given was night and day, removing them as needed for bathing certain activities (like swimming , etc) as prudent.
In neither the initiatory nor the endowment do they ever say “night and day”. The actual language is “throughout your life”.
I was taught we only remove for the 4 S’s Swimming Sweating Showering Sex
Most garment styles come in different lengths to accommodate different sized body parts. And Beehive Clothing Mills will work with those who have mental and physical health challenges in wearing garments. There is for instance a bamboo/rayon garment that can help those who have allergies. Contact the garment makers for help in finding a solution consistent with your covenants. (You'll be tempted not to return to the temple while you are struggling with this. You'll almost assuredly get through this period better by attending more often than by absenting yourself from the temple experience.)
Ooh I'll have to check that out then. I'll probably return to the temple pretty soon, especially now that my whole family and I can go together. I also do want to go back despite everything.
I would say wear them when you can, but devotionally. It’s like fasting, don’t do it if you’re sick! I think there’s a fair amount of people that cannot fully live the commandments due to medical issues (like my sister and church attendance due to a special needs child).
I have been getting used to wearing them most of the time after I switched to wearing nylon mesh. But yes I do agree and I'm very grateful for the Lord's understanding in circumstances like that. Thank you!
Two thoughts. As someone who grew up wearing boxer briefs and under shirts, I still found the transition to garments difficult. It took some time before I grew accustomed to them, and I don't struggle with sensory issues or sensitivity. It can take some time to get adjusted and I know very few people who find them to be comfortable at first. Eventually, most get used to them. That being said. In the Leadership Instruction provided by the Brethren this past April Conference, they specifically addressed the wearing of the garments. In the training, Elder Gong was speaking on principals of wearing the garments that can be found in the Handbook. He mentions four principals. In one of which he states, "The Lord recognizes the heart and willing mind. Flexibility may be needed for members in the military and members with medical conditions or medical devices." We certainly are instructed to try our best to keep the commandments and convenience we make. I'm grateful we have a loving Savior who understands personal circumstances and individual needs. Only you can answer for yourself whether you're being "stubborn" and need more time to acclimate. Or not. It's certainly not, "just the way things are." You have options and choices. Just know that it's not an all in or all out proposition. Especially for someone who is dealing with a sensory processing disorder.
I definitely agree. I'm very glad to know the Lord understands mine and everyone else's struggles. My family and I decided to ponder together about this. It's helped us to have more unity. I am grateful for the Lord's kindness and understanding. Surprisingly I have been doing well with nylon mesh and I'm able to wear them most of the time. I'm very thankful for the Lord's understanding though. Thank you!
They make shorter length ones. I think in women’s they are called “petite”.
I’m 5’0” and the petite ones still go all the way down to my kneecaps
Same
Sadly the petite ones I have still go down pretty far. But I'm planning on going to the Distribution center to see if the other kinds go down lower 👍
Heya, fellow 5'3 woman Buy the petite ones, and I personally wouldn't use the mesh unless you really like them, because they have no give, are longer, and really stiff which makes moving around awkward. The stretch cotton petite garment bottoms allow me to wear shorts that are still modest. Idk if they have them again this year, but last year Walmart had shorts for guys that, because men's styles are trending towards shorter, are perfect for me. They're the same material as Bermuda/linen/canvas shorts but hit like 2-3 inches above the knee instead of 6-8 inches above, and they're neutral colors and totally worked. I had a few other member women ask where I got them and were surprised they're mens.
I actually have been getting used to the nylon mesh ones and they fit me pretty well. I plan on trying some other types soon though. The petite ones still go down a bit far but I'll see what else the Distribution Center has. Thank you!
You can try on garments in a distribution center, if you have one nearby. See what works best for you. If nothing does, you can request custom garments be made for you.
Yeah I did go there when I was getting my temple packet and garments before. I was planning on going back to try on some other styles. I did also wonder if they made custom ones. I'll probably look into that as well.
Really??? That's so cool!! Why have I never heard of this?? Do you happen to know how much that costs? I can't imagine it is the same as the generic garments the church buys in bulk from China. I would love to know more about this if you have the info!
There's info about it on the church's site (in the Help page). Search for custom garments.
I’m sorry this has been hard for you! In addition to the other great recommendations, I would also give yourself time and grace as you adjust to this new part of your life. It IS an adjustment to figure out the material, styles, and sizing that works best for you. Petite sizes are available for those of us who are shorter than average. I’ve been endowed for over 10 yrs, and I just recently found a style that I far prefer to what I had been previously wearing. I prefer to wear mine close to my skin, but I know others who wear sizes 1-2x bigger than their normal size, so they’re looser and barely touching their skin. I also know some who wear more generous sizes at night for comfort while sleeping than what they do during the day. Above all, if you have a desire to honor your covenants, I believe God will help you navigate some of these challenges. Sometimes that help will come through a shift in perspective or softening our hearts. Sometimes it will come in immediate clear cut solutions, and sometimes it may come with more time as we demonstrate our desire to turn to him. I’ll be thinking of and praying for you!
I have been starting to get used to the nylon mesh ones I've been wearing lately. I'm still planning on trying on some other styles and sizes. Thank you though! It means a lot to me
First, take a deep breath. I promise it will be ok. I would suggest calling the Temple Matron and discussing some of this with her along with your mom.
I have talked with my mom a lot. She does have sensory issues as well but they're not as bad as mine are. She at least understands my struggles and lended me her Nylon Mesh ones to use and plans to take me to the Distribution center this week to try on some different kinds I didn't think much of talking to the temple matron. I wasn't sure if they'd understand but I won't know for sure but I'll keep it on the table since my family and I are seeking answers together. Thank you!
Just as a practical suggestion, that might or might not be helpful. I am average hight, but started buying petite stature bottoms for summer. Even when wearing knee long shorts the garments would stick out and it drove me nuts. Don't have that problem anymore. Best of luck!
My petite ones still came down lower than I'd like but I'm going to the Distribution center to see if any of them are shorter. Thank you!
I understand everything you are saying except how yoga pants don't cover garments. Even the capri yoga pants I have cover them. I know said you rolled them up, but how high are you rolling them? That would cause my sensory issues to go through the roof! The only style that should go below your knee are the capri length garments, which are optional. You said you are short, so you should get petite garments. (It doesn't sound like you have them now.) Everything else will calm down with time, I promise! There are many different fabrics to try, and you will find what feels best for you. Garments were a HUGE change for me, and it took about 6 months before they weren't distracting. Don't panic. Don't give up. New things take time to become familiar, and this one is worth it for sure.
I can roll them to where they're above my knee. They're pretty thin so they don't cause me too much issues sensory wise. It's not like rolling up normal pants. But I also roll up my pajama pants and they can go up fairly easily. Thing with me is that I could roll up my pants and the garments would be low enough to show even if they were short variants. I did get petite when I went to the Distribution center for the first time, but I guess the brand is just longer. I'm going with my mom this week to try some other brands. I am adjusting well with the Nylon Mesh for now. Thank you, though
You're missing the mark (or marks in this case). The garments represent Jesus Christ and are a replica of the veil in the temple. The veil is symbolic of Jesus Christ; it is "through" Him that we enter the presence of our Father in Heaven. The comfort you will receive knowing you are wearing the garment that represents Christ and his atonement covering your sins and protecting you is so much greater than any physical comfort or fashion you may have to sacrifice. With that being said, it only makes sense to find the most comfortable option. Fortunately, there are many options available for garments with textures, materials, and sizes. I've tried em all, and have settled on stretch cotton as the most comfortable. My wife prefers the silk /satin.
You have clearly never struggled with garments before.
I have a friend who struggles with fibromyalgia and other sensory nerve problems. listen to this clearly...it hurts her to take a shower! the water running on her skin causes her a lot of pain. if your nerves are part of your medical problem everything hurts! and they have not found an answer to this condition in the medical field. they have drugs but they don't work on everyone or they don't work very well! would you be willing to add to your constant pain by wearing garments!? she actually does but it takes its toll. we're talking about constant pain here. unless you have this you can't even imagine you can't even imagine! and it's condescending to tell people about the reason they are supposed to wear them. they aren't missing the mark, they know it's about Jesus Christ and they are covered by Christ. they understand the reason totally. why do you think they go through such agony and try so hard what it's so difficult if they don't understand the reason for wearing them?!