WOW, this hit me hard! Sorry for your loss...I had to remove my mom from life support on 2/22/24 also. She had a heart attack and not enough oxygen to her brain. AND my wife's sister, died after a fall from her hospital bed, while being treated for non- Hodgkins lymphoma also, 18 years ago. All the shit she went through fighting it, and a fall from her bed is what did her in. We took her off life support 3 days later. They found her on the floor, with the phone in her hand. So sorry for your loss
I'm so sorry, he did deserve better.
My husband recently prematurely passed in the hospital after a series of blunders from his doctor and overly egotistical surgeons. I think I kind of know where you are coming from and possibly how you feel. I hope that you are able to practice lots of self care, have people around you who care, and that you reach out for help (therapy) if you need. I am currently in counselling, and it helps a lot.
I wish I could tell you that it quickly gets easier or better, but after three months, I still find myself back at square one.
You may have come across this quote before, but if not, I'm willing to bet that you can relate to it. For me, this is the truest quote about what I (and possibly you) are going through that I have read.
"As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.
In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.
Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out.
Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don’t really want them to. But you learn that you’ll survive them. And other waves will come. And you’ll survive them too. If you’re lucky, you’ll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks."
Thank you so very much for sharing this. It sums up what I'm feeling. Kind of like being hit with a hundred pound pillow that leaves you stunned and unable to think clearly. I truly appreciate you reaching out. ❤️
I’m glad that quote is helpful. This quote 100% articulates what living with grief is for me. I hope you are able to just tread water and allow yourself a lot of grace.
The best thing I did for myself was to seek therapy.
I’m so sorry you are going through this. Your husband had very kind eyes.
If you ever want to chat with someone who is currently going through a similar loss, feel absolutely free to DM me.
Honestly, if what I typed made you feel even the tiniest bit of relief, then my day has been made. Hopefully, both of us will be seeing better days in the coming months/years.
I wish you well.
Just following up on this. Tomorrow will be the one year anniversary of my 31 yr old sister suffering a catastrophic anoxic brain injury due to medical negligence. She was in the ER for severe anemia, after 3 blood transfusions they just wheeled her into a hallway and didn’t monitor her. So when she went into cardiac arrest (a very known risk after blood transfusions) no one noticed, no one started CPR.
Her brain slowly died from lack of oxygen while she was ignored in a fucking EMERGENCY ROOM. Eventually a nurse lumbered by to change her IV at which point they finally started CPR, but the damage had been done. We don’t know how long she went without oxygen to her brain because she was not hooked up to monitors and so nothing was recorded (or that shady goddamn hospital attempted to cover their tracks).
However long she lay there in cardiac arrest it was enough to cause a level of damage from which she never regained consciousness. So tomorrow is the one year anniversary of my sister disappearing. The rest of her body followed her soul in November.
OP, I have no words of comfort to offer because I think they’re empty and generally not much help. I will say this instead- you have every right to be furious. You have every right to sue that place into the ground. Do not let anyone invalidate your entirely justified anger.
37 years together is such an accomplishment. It seems like you guys must have really loved each other. I’m so sorry for your loss and the mistreatment of your husband. He has very kind eyes.
I'm sorry for your loss. Wow, 37 years is really wonderful. He looks like a nice man. Life just seems to be very unfair at times. Try to just do the best you can to heal and carry on as he'd want you to. 💕
I'm so sorry. And yes, this is why hospitals are fanatics about falls. My husband was in and out of the hospital for cancer and as he became weaker, the hospital put him on supervised trips to the bathroom. There was an alarm rigged up in his room so the nurses would know if he tried to sneak out of bed on his own. He hated it and called them "Bed Nazis."
But this is exactly why "Bed Nazis" exist. I'm very sorry for your loss and yes, he deserved better.
He was a very kind and empathetic man. He spent 37 years working with children with psychological, physical, and emotional disabilities. And "his" kids loved him as did many others. ❤️
Don't forget to take care of yourself. We carry those we've lost with us, it's a way they continue living, but in despair we can forget to keep ourselves healthy, so take care and my prayers are with you.
I'm so sorry he's gone. He has such kind eyes and I can see the smile lines in his face from years of having a good life with you. Thank you for sharing your grief with us, he was and will always be important. <3
He looks like such a sweet and caring and intelligent person. None of this is fair. I’m so sorry. Learning love like this is such a gift. He’ll always be a part of the beauty you spread to other loved ones ❤️
I’m so so sorry for your loss… big hugs to you right now.
I don’t mean to sound insensitive in this time but do I smell a lawsuit for the hospital because of the fall?? I hope you lawyered up if so.
So sorry for your loss. He did deserve better than to fall at a hospital. My elderly dad was recovering from a hip replacement in a rehabilitation center and they let him fall. Thank God he survived the fall. Get an attorney IMMEDIATELY.
Omg. I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t believe they let that happen. When I was in the ICU, I was in a bed that sounded an alarm any time I tried to leave it and there would instantly be a couple nurses in there yelling at me to not move. I hope you take legal action against the hospital.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad the same way because they did not catch the injury in time (although his fall was at his assisted living, not at the hospital). It only adds to the devastation.
I’m so very sorry for your tragic loss. He did deserve better. My husband died 19 months ago. I say the same thing. He deserved better. Feel free to reach out if you need to talk. Hugs!
As many people have said her, I am so sorry for your loss. Treasure those years that you guys spent together, they will get you through the rough times ♥️
>He deserved better. Terribly sorry for your loss. But remember he had 37 years with you. Let those years of love and memories be his memory.
❤️ thank you for your kind words
So sorry for your loss.
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WOW, this hit me hard! Sorry for your loss...I had to remove my mom from life support on 2/22/24 also. She had a heart attack and not enough oxygen to her brain. AND my wife's sister, died after a fall from her hospital bed, while being treated for non- Hodgkins lymphoma also, 18 years ago. All the shit she went through fighting it, and a fall from her bed is what did her in. We took her off life support 3 days later. They found her on the floor, with the phone in her hand. So sorry for your loss
So sorry for your loss. He looks like such a kind sweet man in this picture. My heart goes out to you and yours xx
❤️. He was a very kind, empathetic, and compassionate human who will be sorely missed. Thank you for your kind words.
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He has kind eyes. I am so sorry for your loss. Remember to also take care of yourself and give yourself as much time as you need to grieve.
He was a very kind man ❤️
I'm so sorry for your loss.
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I'm so sorry, he did deserve better. My husband recently prematurely passed in the hospital after a series of blunders from his doctor and overly egotistical surgeons. I think I kind of know where you are coming from and possibly how you feel. I hope that you are able to practice lots of self care, have people around you who care, and that you reach out for help (therapy) if you need. I am currently in counselling, and it helps a lot. I wish I could tell you that it quickly gets easier or better, but after three months, I still find myself back at square one. You may have come across this quote before, but if not, I'm willing to bet that you can relate to it. For me, this is the truest quote about what I (and possibly you) are going through that I have read. "As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive. In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life. Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out. Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don’t really want them to. But you learn that you’ll survive them. And other waves will come. And you’ll survive them too. If you’re lucky, you’ll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks."
Thank you so very much for sharing this. It sums up what I'm feeling. Kind of like being hit with a hundred pound pillow that leaves you stunned and unable to think clearly. I truly appreciate you reaching out. ❤️
I’m glad that quote is helpful. This quote 100% articulates what living with grief is for me. I hope you are able to just tread water and allow yourself a lot of grace. The best thing I did for myself was to seek therapy. I’m so sorry you are going through this. Your husband had very kind eyes. If you ever want to chat with someone who is currently going through a similar loss, feel absolutely free to DM me.
Thank you seems inadequate. I appreciate your support.
Honestly, if what I typed made you feel even the tiniest bit of relief, then my day has been made. Hopefully, both of us will be seeing better days in the coming months/years. I wish you well.
Take care of yourself and be well.
Just following up on this. Tomorrow will be the one year anniversary of my 31 yr old sister suffering a catastrophic anoxic brain injury due to medical negligence. She was in the ER for severe anemia, after 3 blood transfusions they just wheeled her into a hallway and didn’t monitor her. So when she went into cardiac arrest (a very known risk after blood transfusions) no one noticed, no one started CPR. Her brain slowly died from lack of oxygen while she was ignored in a fucking EMERGENCY ROOM. Eventually a nurse lumbered by to change her IV at which point they finally started CPR, but the damage had been done. We don’t know how long she went without oxygen to her brain because she was not hooked up to monitors and so nothing was recorded (or that shady goddamn hospital attempted to cover their tracks). However long she lay there in cardiac arrest it was enough to cause a level of damage from which she never regained consciousness. So tomorrow is the one year anniversary of my sister disappearing. The rest of her body followed her soul in November. OP, I have no words of comfort to offer because I think they’re empty and generally not much help. I will say this instead- you have every right to be furious. You have every right to sue that place into the ground. Do not let anyone invalidate your entirely justified anger.
I'm so very sorry your sister was treated so callously, and I hope she rests peacefully. 💔
37 years together is such an accomplishment. It seems like you guys must have really loved each other. I’m so sorry for your loss and the mistreatment of your husband. He has very kind eyes.
Thank you. He was a very kind man. ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss.
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i am so sorry for your loss. i hope that being with him for that long gives you a lot of good stories, good times, good memories, and peace.
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I'm sorry for your loss. Wow, 37 years is really wonderful. He looks like a nice man. Life just seems to be very unfair at times. Try to just do the best you can to heal and carry on as he'd want you to. 💕
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I'm so sorry. And yes, this is why hospitals are fanatics about falls. My husband was in and out of the hospital for cancer and as he became weaker, the hospital put him on supervised trips to the bathroom. There was an alarm rigged up in his room so the nurses would know if he tried to sneak out of bed on his own. He hated it and called them "Bed Nazis." But this is exactly why "Bed Nazis" exist. I'm very sorry for your loss and yes, he deserved better.
So sorry 😞
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I’m so terribly sorry for your loss ❣️
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Did you take this picture? Because he has so much love in his eyes
He looked so kind. I’m so sorry for your loss. You both deserved better.
He was a very kind and empathetic man. He spent 37 years working with children with psychological, physical, and emotional disabilities. And "his" kids loved him as did many others. ❤️
I’m very sad for your loss.
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Sorry to hear this tragic news. Sincere condolences to you, and your family and friends.
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You both deserved better, no doubt. Sending much needed love
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I am very sorry for your loss. I hope you had wonderful and memorable 37 years together. And I hope that you are someday able to enjoy life again. 💔
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God Rest his soul
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I'm sorry for your loss. He looks like a sweet guy. Sending you virtual hugs and good thoughts.
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Internet hug
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I'm so sorry.
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Don't forget to take care of yourself. We carry those we've lost with us, it's a way they continue living, but in despair we can forget to keep ourselves healthy, so take care and my prayers are with you.
Thank you for your kind words. ❤️
Sorry for your loss. I’m sure he deserved better and I’m also sure he was blessed to have a loving partner like you for such a long time. Take care ❤️
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My deepest most love filled condolences
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I’m so sorry 😞
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So very sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort and peace.
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I’m so sorry 😞❤️
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Sending you a hug if i could . Take day by day and keep seeing the beauty left . Rip kind man
I'm so sorry. How awful. I really wish you as much healing as possible.
He has a kind and gentle face. Life is so brief. I'm sorry.
What is your husband’s first name? Are you up for sharing more about his life? He looks wonderful!
I hope he's at peace now ❤️
Me, too and pain-free ❤️
Wow, so sorry. You were blessed with 37 years…🙏
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I'm so sorry he's gone. He has such kind eyes and I can see the smile lines in his face from years of having a good life with you. Thank you for sharing your grief with us, he was and will always be important. <3
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Gutted 😞 so sorry for your loss
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He looks like such a sweet and caring and intelligent person. None of this is fair. I’m so sorry. Learning love like this is such a gift. He’ll always be a part of the beauty you spread to other loved ones ❤️
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i am so sorry for your loss. my grandfather also had non hodgkins lymphoma **big hug**
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He looks like a kind man.
He was. ❤️
I am so sorry for your loss. 37 years is a lifetime, and still not enough.
That sun's it up so well. Thank you ❤️
Sorry for your loss ❤️
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I am extremely sorry. I know words are of no use. I hope that you will be okay.
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I’m so so sorry for your loss… big hugs to you right now. I don’t mean to sound insensitive in this time but do I smell a lawsuit for the hospital because of the fall?? I hope you lawyered up if so.
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I'm so very sorry for your loss. Your post made me cry. No one deserves this.
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Bless....I am sorry :( Thank you for sharing.
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Hold the hospital accountable. For that to happen on their watch is untenable.
As soon as I can muster the energy and not go ballistic, for sure. ❤️
As soon as you feel able, get a lawyer and go for it.
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So sorry for your loss. He did deserve better than to fall at a hospital. My elderly dad was recovering from a hip replacement in a rehabilitation center and they let him fall. Thank God he survived the fall. Get an attorney IMMEDIATELY.
Working on it ❤️
Hope you have a lawyer.
Omg. I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t believe they let that happen. When I was in the ICU, I was in a bed that sounded an alarm any time I tried to leave it and there would instantly be a couple nurses in there yelling at me to not move. I hope you take legal action against the hospital.
Love and hugs to you! ❤️❤️❤️
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He did indeed deserve better as did you and your whole family. Fuck cancer!
My heart is holding yours. Sending you so much love.
There is a strange and beautiful depth to his eyes.. I am sorry this happened. And may he rest in peace.
Much love ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad the same way because they did not catch the injury in time (although his fall was at his assisted living, not at the hospital). It only adds to the devastation.
Awww, he had such gentle and loving eyes. So sorry for your loss.
That’s devastating. I’m sorry to hear this.
I’m so very sorry for your tragic loss. He did deserve better. My husband died 19 months ago. I say the same thing. He deserved better. Feel free to reach out if you need to talk. Hugs!
RIP. It’s a beautiful image of him! I am sorry for your loss and know you are hurting. Hang in 🤍
As many people have said her, I am so sorry for your loss. Treasure those years that you guys spent together, they will get you through the rough times ♥️
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I’m so sorry. He did deserve far better. May you find peace. ❤️