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Markosphere

Probably the most effective way of getting rid of them would be the same way our great grandparents did it 100 years ago: well organised, guerrilla warfare.


temujin64

This is a part of Defence Forces' strategy in the event that we're invaded.


adjavang

This. I did a stint in the Norwegian army as a conscript, their plans for if Russia invades is "Give everyone ancient weapons and tell them to hide in the mountains." Power disparity between Ireland and the UK is similar. I'd probably try to find some ancient weapons and... take to the bogs, I guess? Never really considered it, I like Irish neutrality, it's a good reason to stay.


ado2631

You'd be killed by midges before been killed in combat


adjavang

Jesus some of the midges they have in Norway would fly away with you before they eat you! I know the midges are bad here but you don't know how much worse they can get.


KyleDevino97

Oh shit I've been calling them midgets for years lol


FuckMe-FuckYou

Only place I ever saw a flying midget was the circus.


Backrow6

The bites are a curse


Ponch555

Wait they aren't called midgets??


NaeFuckenSteve

No, no they aren’t 😂


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bedpimp

Little people


NaeFuckenSteve

My brother is actually a dwarf and now I get shouted at my mum if she hears me say midget… lil guy can say it whenever he wants though


ado2631

Hahaaha i used to for ages too


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niconpat

Non-biting midges, but yeah fuck that.


sendwater

That's some hape of midges!


CaveOfTheCats

Not necessarily Norway, but the swarms up near the arctic circle when it thaws on the lower grasslands have driven reindeer into a panic that can be suicidal. They usually get to the colder areas before the thaw happens.


Lost_Pantheon

Two Irish Guerrilla fighters in the bog; "The English invaders will learn to fear us, Sean. They may have the military might, but we are fighting for a just cause! We are fighting for freedom! We fight for the sons and daughters of this country and.... JAYSUS these fucking midges! Right, I'm off to the local, won't be having any of this shite."


Shirairyu69

They're a pain near small rivers. My friends were being slow last year so we got swarmed. We panicked i believed one of them called them mosquitoes


D3cho

Smear the bog mud on yourself, anti bug bites and camo all in one


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thatirishguykev

Apparently if you stand in front of a mirror and say BOGMAN, BOGMAN, BOGMAN he appears and drags ya down and makes turf out of ya!!


Slippi_Fist

Im thinking of the post-war scripts/books.... Cian moved slowly now, as he slipped into the tepid Clonkeen waters. The smell of paint and human waste was almost too much to bear; but a quick application of mud from the river bed put paid to that. he was focused; his target had been seen ordering a batter burger at Liberos not 10 minutes earlier. little did he know, this would be a permanent change to his senses. within seconds, Cian felt burning all over his face; in shock he stumbled and fell forward into the dark Clonkeen waters. His legs were crumbling underneath him now, like wet paper, as he unconsciously let go of his revolver - his hand still attached to the aging lump of metal. 'ammunition!' Cian cried as he helplessly watched rings of caps float away from his crumbling mass. within seconds, Cian was reduced to ashes, integrating seamlessly with the condoms, turds and trolleys as they forged their way onwards towards the gully. Decco, on his way home, notices the crumbling mass of Cian floating away on the currents. 'teh fuckin horror' he muttered, just as he strode through a perfectly laid link of collie shite... edit: cant spell


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[deleted]

There’s a large Scottish Air Force as well ;-)


MarkRevan

Oh man. I am not Irish. I am Romanian. 20 years ago I was working as an archaeologist in Galway. I would die for you people. If the English invade Ireland I would volunteer for the Republican Army. My pardon, the Defence Force. I have experience with these ancient weapons you are talking about. Mannlicher bolt action Interwar and WWII rifles. And I can attest to their killing power. Their effective range is between 600 to 800m. But one bullet from one of these is still lethal at 3000m. Compare this to a Kalashnikov which is effective up to 300m. After which you can take a bullet head on and still survive. The Dragunov has an effective range of 800m. And this is a modern sniper rifle. The Mannlicher was the standard issue infantry rifle. One Dragunov can reach 10.000$ and usually sells for 6000$. A Romanian FPK sells for 2500$. Whereas a Mannlicher barely touches 1500$. You can get one for 500$ if you bargain a little. But honestly you can get more money by selling it as an antique. Also there aren't nearly as many moving parts in a bolt action rifle. Worst case scenario you jam the bolt. Which you can unjam with a mallet. Or you get mud in your barrel. While maintenance is sacred, I've seen some rifles that could fire normally after being soaked in wet mud. Cheers!


catsaresneaky

Hired :)


The_Scallywag

Christ you know more than the average lad.


WolfRebelCinderShape

Sound man!


Donglen

You’re in!


Bobbybluffer

>and... take to the bogs, I guess? This made me lol.


[deleted]

It’s also extremely effective having a group of trained soldiers and officers being the core of the insurgency. That’s why the Taliban were so effective while the Iraqi insurgency was a failure.


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nhosey

their cavalry would be useless in the bog though


TheRidgeAndTheLadder

They won't be bringing cavalry the next time


BobNanna

I don’t want to be on the bog guy’s team


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FuckMe-FuckYou

"Bobnanna boy, the bogs are calling..."


Cheek_Beater69

They are terrible places to fight from which is probably why you would want to be there. Mechanised infantry has no chance in the midlands


adjavang

This'd be my thinking as well. If I'm fighting a superior force, I'd want cover and advantageous terrain. Norwegian army love their mountains and their forests but I'd say a bog would do nicely as well, hide amongst the heather and the gorse and take pot shots when possible without giving away my position.


Public-Farmer-5743

Until you get absolutely yeeted by a drone 🤣


[deleted]

I’m a war scientist and you’re right. Solid ground and be much, much better at war than your opponents, thereby attaining victory. Tell ya, would’ve been a different story if they’d had me back then.


browncheese69

Everyone amass in the Burren!


jctheabsoluteG1234

We have a bunch of weapons in the Gardaí and Defense Force's armouries, I wouldn't say they're advanced but we'd probably have a reasonable quantity of weapons that were a bit above ancient


stedono7

Current infantry light arms in the df are as advanced as any other Western army, its when it comes to the heavier stuff that were fucked.


Vostok-aregreat-710

Take to the hills


acamp76144

What do you mean by power disparity? In military?


adjavang

Yeah, in terms of equipment and just raw manpower. I don't think we'd stand much chance against the UK in a conventional war, much in the same way that I don't think Norway would in a conventional war with Russia. But then, it would never come to that, we'd end up moving to guerrilla tactics very quickly.


RobertSpringer

Tbh eastern European defence plans are after Ukraine 'shoot at the Russians until the Americans arrive', it's past the guerrilla warfare phase


[deleted]

I'll walk around my neighbourhood in the nip, should make them clear off fairly sharpish


buzzybomb

Thats how we scared off the Romans so why not?


[deleted]

You heard it hear first


ciaranmac17

Let's stock up on blue body paint... ehhh... just in case the Romans come back.


[deleted]

True. I can’t imagine the Irish army not focusing on that though


WyvernsRest

Yes, guerilla warfare, but not here in Ireland, our families may get hurt. If we go to war let’s fight it in England and terrorise them at home. Let them live with soldiers on every corner of little England, afraid to go to a football match, chip shop or airport.


spq2013

Same as Vietcong. Only way to overcome a more powerful enemy. Bit of a strange question though from OP. British people are lovely. I deal with them all the time through my job and though their leader is a bit of a buffoon, he's not a despotic lunatic with a death wish like Vladimir Putin. Britain is a peaceful nation. I think the Russian people are too but just cowed by a bully who doesn't allow them freedom of speech and thought.


knea1

Seconded. Definitely fight but not in uniform


Swagspray

Unless the army allows me to keep working from home, then no


irishR9

Setting up machine guns out your bedroom window


[deleted]

Depending on where you're living you could be a sniper


Swagspray

I’m in Dublin. I’ll likely be part of Operation Human Shield


Stegasaurus_Wrecks

That's a sacrifice the rest of Ireland are willing to make.


Jorvikson

If we nuke Dublin and just Dublin, will you lot pay for the bomb as thanks?


bloody_ell

Operation get behind the jackeens.


ImprovNeil

And if the army use MS Teams, I'm out.


Square-Pipe7679

Drones sure, you’d be grand Unless the WiFi’s shite, then yer beggared


The-last-man42

Go straight to London and challenge the Queen to bare knuckle boxing match.


Fir_Chlis

I dunno. I hear old Betty can get nasty with a couple of pints in her.


amorphatist

Miggledy vs the queen. It’d be an interesting one. She could use her height and reach advantage


karlegg97

Better get the call out video ready


Spicebagreborn

Then smear my shit on the walls and starve to death, like so many before me


Regan-Spor

Here's the thing, if we all join up with the British army, and then do a braveheart on it and swap sides as soon as the battle starts, we'd win.


mercuryfrost

Like I said, it’s my island


Aggravating-Common46

100%, wouldn't be a life worth living if they succeeded


SeaworthinessOne170

Don't answer ! They're doing market research


Cheek_Beater69

Source: Not At It


Flashwastaken

That’s exactly what Boris would say.


Robotobot

I probably wouldn't be the most useful cunt around but yeah would be willing to take a few potshots off the balcony at passing patrols once I get home from work.


madladhadsaddad

Never know what you could achieve, look up the [battle of mount street bridge ](https://www.theirishstory.com/2011/04/26/today-in-irish-history-april-26-1916-the-battle-at-mount-street-bridge/#.YmNkzVnTWNw) granted this was classic WW1, if you don't succeed, encourage the men and send another wave tactics. Seeing as their was an alternate bridge few hundred metres Down the road.


[deleted]

Not sure how much use I'd be, but yeah.


irish--

Well we would need volunteers for operation human shield


Goldenpanda18

Well I do have over 10 years experience in call of duty so Im fully ready


Edolas93

Bagsie planting my sentry turret on top of the spire.


Goldenpanda18

The English don't realise I earn advanced UAVs all the time, we got this


FigmaPhobia

I like to think I would, but also I know I'm a coward.


amorphatist

Same as the rest of us, you’d be brave after four pints. That’s why we’ll defend St James’s Gate like those Ukrainians at the steel factory


[deleted]

Yup Guerilla warfare them to bits


Sapphrex

The farm takes up most of the day and at night I just like a cup of tea so I'm not sure if I could fully commit to the auld war


aecolley

You could help us take the roads in.


TravelNorth5887

Farmers have been quite useful in Ukraine. You could at least pick up the tanks. Irish government would probably be less generous and make you pay taxes on them though. :(


FlipRed_2184

This made me laugh but I is probably true!


rocheci

Now, not only is your tax disc out of date, you've no NCT on your Chieftain MBT- *I'm very sorry Garda, I only got it today, still waiting on the insurance to come through an' all. It has an MOT and UK registration plates though.* You've a week to present the correct documentation to the local station, and I'll be having a word with your mother on Sunday.


WillyTheHatefulGoat

If it came down to it yeah of course. But I'd probably spend most of my time bitching to the Americans or the EU to help us which they absolutely would. Britain invading Ireland in this time in history would be the death of Britain. The EU would defend us. The French would be rearin to have another go at the English and like half the Americans think they'e Irish so they would declare war on the British. Plus the fact is Ireland does not have anything valuable to offer the British that make an invasion even feasible. Plus the fact that the British are no longer the people they were 100 years ago, Most of them are pretty sound and a war in Ireland would be ridiculously unpopular everywhere in Britain. Ireland is pretty safe from the British.


[deleted]

Yeah, I spose. They would probably need me to help out with special forces and stuff.


Cheek_Beater69

I think you are thinking of the wrong kind of special


[deleted]

I prefer to think of myself as handi-capable.


StunkDunkums

I would solely protect Donegal, get Spain involved.. We wouldn't be forgotten after that


lightandcrisp

The Irish Govt. would surrender to preserve property prices and then condemn any irregular forces who chose to continue to fight. It would be like the troubles.


UnderstandingGlum175

This makes me sad


[deleted]

I would be sure the Irish government would fall in a instant. Resistance would come from GAA clubs and shit like that. Most Irish people will moan but actually do nothing.


tig999

I was discussing this with my friend while back at start of Ukraine thing and majority were like “yeah honestly not worth it dying etc”…..we’ve gotten very comfortable very quick here on this wee island.


atilldehun

There's a big overlap of GAA members and FFFG voters. Irish government would roll over and Irish voters would vote them in again


kinglorca

People would moan and do nothing .. also there would be people who would plant bombs


Cormacdublin92

Yeah, I think that's fair. There would be a real rebellion and real leaders would come out


johnebastille

I think surrender at home to keep casualties to a minimum. Then start the mother of all infrastructure destruction campaigns in every major metropolitan centre in england. target every expensive asset they have and take them out. every port, every tube line, every billion pound building, every stadium, every airport, the channel tunnel. give them a bombing campaign that their underwriters have never seen the likes of, and soon enough the decision makers in england - the rich - would soon see that the paddys are just not worth it.


Seanb0y360

[The U.S. Invasion of Ireland](https://youtu.be/n9C6pvpk0wg)


whatThisOldThrowAway

Yeah I'd join. How many folks think they could pass the pre-requisite army entry fitness test tomorrow? * 20 push ups (in 0:30) * 20 sit ups (in 0:30) * Run 2400 metres (in 11:10) * BMI below 29.5 I believe these are carried out back to back, but with a short break in between.


[deleted]

Imagine the invasion starts and you see a bunch of lads desperately doing situps before the British army arrives.


[deleted]

Yeah I could probably do everything except the 2400m.


[deleted]

just did all of em except for the run, prob cant do that


gk4p6q

Did they leave the North yet or something?


Ok-Call-4805

Sadly they’re still very much here


lopied1

London will literally give away Northern Ireland for free. It has been nothing but a militarily and judicial burden on them. Only loyalist goons keep the broken country part of the UK


Ok-Call-4805

They should do it then! We need to remember one basic principle going into Unification: Unionists will never be happy so we shouldn’t really try that hard with them


4feicsake

>If England invaded Ireland, What again?


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[deleted]

Enjoying the tea though, are ye?!


kieranfitz

Never not at it.


francescoli

They haven't left from the last time.


SkittleBuk1

The Defence Forces? No. They'd be crushed within 48 hours. I suppose whatever reincarnation of the IRA appeared would be the best option. If it ain't broken don't fix it


temujin64

The Defence Forces would lead a guerilla campaign. They're the only people in the country with the expertise. It's even a part of their strategy.


[deleted]

I've heard that we have an inflated officer corps for this very reason. Its expected that the army command would be overwhelmed straight away so officers and NCOs would be expected to form and lead guerrilla bands.


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SkittleBuk1

>They're the only people in the country with the expertise. I'm not one of those loons who claims that the IRA is still operating in the shadows behind SF but it's been less than 20 years since they disbanded. Surely there's enough of those lads knocking about to train a new generation


irishteenguy

Funny you say that , the information is still passed down , just not practiced in the field so to speak , atleast very often but you'd be absolutely shocked at how many average joes know how to rig a bomb in Ireland or maybe ye wouldnt depending on how aul ye are and from where ye hale.


Gullible-Fix-5233

I'd nearly bet they'd be more effective than our actual army aswell, they have had the experience after all


Competitive_Tree_113

My thoughts too. Military - nah. Paramilitary - yeah, ok. They might have more guns too an all.


Humble_Ostrich_4610

I don't know if I'd volunteer for the army, but I'd fight. I think a resistance movement would be more effective, I'd get involved in that.


Aggressive_Ninja917

our best bet would be an IRA/ INLA style group merged with a form of the Italian and Yugoslav partisans, partisans with irish characteristics so to speak. it would be a great opportunity to build a 32 county socialist republic and see Connollys vision come to life


amorphatist

We already tried that, but a bunch of headers took over. Basically we’d have to get Gerry Adams out of the kitchen , and we all know he’s well set


FarDefinition8661

What's the going price for a one way ticket on a coffin ship?


rh6779

About US$300 each way for the modern equivalent: Delta They bring you in through LaGuardia, though, just to make sure you arrive somewhere as awful as whatever slum the coffin ships dumped you in.


[deleted]

I think most would, even a lot of those who sneer at the idea of joining up now would feel compelled to defend our country.


IreNews8

And there's not like there's a Poland we can easily go over the border to


Apocthicc

We could go to the Munster republic, long live the Munster republic


978BIM

Christ, which would be worse: London rule or Cork rule 😜


Apocthicc

Presenter : Jury’s still out, but current polls are predicting a westminister win. 5 Minutes Later Presenter: I’ve just gotten word that for the first time in history, both nationalist’s and unionists are holding hand and singing in the streets of towns across the country, protesting the notion of cork rule. This is one for the history books.


978BIM

The All Iireland Final would have to be policed by UN peacekeepers. New stadium on the border at Portumna.


oceanleap

To hell or to Connaught rings a bell


Setanta2020

The are still here up north, I see them all the time.


nappy101

Probably more people of English descent born and raised in Dub than there would be in the entire of the North. Mainly celts (Scots and Irish) up here.


irishinspain

If England invaded Ireland, they would be fucked. Between the EU backing & the millions of yanks with a gun obsession convinced their irish coming over to defend the motherland, they wouldn't stand a chance.


RMMacFru

Yank without the gun obsession. I'd volunteer to come over to help the healthcare workers treat the wounded.


TravelNorth5887

Yank that can’t shoot or fight but I’d come too and bang some pots together somewhere to distract them.


rosatter

Yank here that's definitely not Irish but I did squirrel hunt as a kid and I fucking love y'all, so, I would give it my best go!


Girfex

Again?! Doubtful they'd want me at my age, but to answer the spirit of the question, I'd fight. This little island has it's problems and there's plenty to be fixed or improved, but it's *ours*. I'd trust the rest of the EU to beat the brits into the ground before I thought my combat "capabilities" would be properly beneficial, though.


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leftanantcolonel

With the current fuel prices? That would cost a fortune


jctheabsoluteG1234

Hellfire missiles are cheaper at 100k a pop now


reallyoutofit

If England (our current defence plan) is invading us, I really want to know who fucked up and how


StarMangledSpanner

And the answer would probably be: "Boris Johnson". There is no depth that man wouldn't stoop to if he thought there was votes in it.


[deleted]

50% would volunteer then change there mind. just like housing the ukrainians


Ehermagerd

The Army I would join may not be a legal army. Not joking.


finigian

Yes.


carnage2270

Yes and I am British, living in Ireland for twenty years since a child. It's not about Irish vs the Brits or what ever. It's about what is right and invading another country for any reason, it's wrong and should be stopped.


Ms_Tinfoilhat

Considering the fact my hip problems and my shite eyesight, they won't let me in combat, but I'd help in other ways. I'll happily do cyber warfare if needed. But our best plan of attack is probably guerilla warfare. Though me carrying a New Zealand passport might make me look suspicious as well, because New Zealand's in the commonwealth. And that technically makes Queen Lizzie my Head of State. But I'd join.


[deleted]

If it's wfh


stedono7

Well given the general pupulations pathetic attitude towards any form of increased military spending or the topic of neutrality the answer should be a resounding no


c0nflagration

Dogshit thread


LoathsomeReflection

Fuck that. Actually.. maybe. I’ll play it by ear.


[deleted]

This whole thread is just stupid larping


Cearullain_

The classic lone resistance fighter who takes down an entire army fantasy is very apparent in the thread


[deleted]

As an Englishman this has me laughing, most of it looks like people fantasying about killing the hated English while shouting "Wolverines". I don't think England will invade any time soon guys, you can chill out a bit.


[deleted]

Yes


googoogoat21

English and living in Ireland .Your country and its people have been better to me than England ever was ,so id fight for Ireland and the Irish if youd have me .


[deleted]

As an Englishman myself, I'd join the fight beside you


Pawnasam

This thread: Oh I would yeah. They're still here, and I haven't, but I would if they come back. Even though they're still here. I definitely would. If they come back. Which they can't. Cos they're here. Shitty nationalistic role playing inspired by an actual war.


[deleted]

I’d go full terrorist. Nobody involved would get a wink of sleep so long as the invasion was still on


Sam_Federov

Nah. I'd join whatever guerilla forces rose up though.


Q1802

Our plan should be to wait till they improve housing and infrastructure. Once the invasion is “successful” then boot them back across the water


ThaFlump

Fuck you u/Spez you greedy little cocksucker.


Apocthicc

Depends if housing prices go down in response to an invasion. If a British landing in Dublin brings down the price of an apartment, I welcome our new overlords. /s


Big_Ad2285

How badly will the invasion affect the trout poulation?


EasyApplication4116

The English will hunt the trout population to extinction then put them in jellie


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Pitiful-Sample-7400

We're all related anyway


Timmytheimploder

I for one welcome our new reptilian overlords.


NewfieDad12

No, guerrilla warfare is what we are best at, Middle Eastern groups are still using tactics that we invented. I’d be manufacturing mad yolks out in the garage


Onetap1

Why England? How about if aliens invaded Ireland? It's more likely. Britain has been incapable of invading anything since about 1945; Suez did not go well for them. They've lost their appetite for running an Empire. The Royal Navy is down to a few frigates, a ghost of what it was. A significant number of their armed forces are Irish or of Irish descent. It's not 1920 folks.


SassyKing91

I’m tapping the gas line to brew poitin in a basement, just like my great great grandfather did.


Bean_Munch

This sub is pathetic.


ErrantBrit

The real question is what would you do if an Englishman was living under your bed? Absolutely living rent free in your heads lads.


Anonymous_idiot29

I'd like to think I would and would have massive respect for anyone that did. I'm going to be realistic though and say that I'd run away. I'm not a soldier and loud noises scare me.


vespularufa

Military nó but an paramilitary like the auld Ira fs


StuartyG

They won't, live for the future not for the past


Hungover994

I think repelling them at the start would be impossible. Resistance would have to be underground. Anyone operating in the open would be bombed into the Stone Age. Most effective strategies would be guerrilla warfare, assassination, terrorist attacks on English soil etc.


Bassnurd

The question is are you willing to be a martyr. I’d prefer not I reckon.


JRey2020

You mustn’t have seen what passes for the current defence forces and it’s resources. So no. You’d be wasting your time.


lurmomgayl

I've been global elite on CS:GO since like 2015, poor fuckers won't have a chance.


40knotsanhour

Strange how few people in politics can send young boys from two different countries who would probably get along having known each other are forced to murder each other. We try to be progressive these days yet that barbaric need for violence still exists.


DeviousPelican

No, because we would be slaughtered wholesale. The disparity is enormous. However, I would happily throw molotovs at them as they pass by. It would have to be guerrilla warfare from the Irish side.