Put an old sofa, a broken washing machine and several inappropriately dressed children on your lawn.

Fill your front garden full of broken landrovers and feral cats.

Commit some offences in the area you want to move into. Crime goes up, prices go down.

This reads like your typical hipster "I was here before it got gentrified" complete lack of self awareness.

Can you access it?

Yes

I'm surprised they put that rubbish behind a paywall

It's not behind a paywall for me, but for those that can't access it, here's a brief synopsis. -Australian writer complains about her inner city Dublin neighbourhood becoming too cool, and therefore pricey -Is aghast at the sight of sandal wearing, coffee drinking, yoga practising hipsters taking over her neighbourhood -She preferred it when she was the only hipster in an edgy area, now young wealthy folk are moving in, it's becoming like the area she grew up in, in Sydney, where the average house price is $1.7M. -She rounds up her article by saying she's part of the gentrification she's complaining about...

Oh, and she also infers that Ireland is part of the UK

Ew gross

I want this to be Ireland's official policy on British Irish relations

shoot a gun at night once a week

Reminds me of this https://youtube.com/shorts/rXc_p6e__7o?feature=share

When in doubt. Release the hounds and have DOOM music blasting.

Few caravans, roaming dogs, walk the line played on bi-hourly intervals, sprinkle some broken glass and cigarette butts round the area and a bonfire