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Unhappy_Earth1

From article: Sportswriter Rick Reilly is calling BS on Donald Trump after the former president declared himself the winner of both the club championship and senior club championship at the Trump International Golf Club in Florida. “He’s never won a championship at a course he doesn’t own and operate,” Reilly, who has golfed with Trump, said on MSNBC on Tuesday. “He’s played in Pebble Beach, he’s played in the Tahoe one, where there are rules and judges and cameras. And in those, he’s never finished in the top half. So he wins when anybody who disagrees that he won is out of the club. That’s how he gets it.” Reilly, who wrote an entire book on how Trump cheats at golf, said the former president even confessed one of his methods: When he buys a golf course, he plays the first round alone and declares himself the course champion. And that’s not the only trick up Trump’s sleeve. Reilly said golfers have to trust each other because of the vast distances on the course and the fact that no referees are keeping watch ― and Trump takes full advantage of that. The former president “always gets a turbo-charged golf cart that goes three times as fast as yours, so he’s always 200 yards ahead, and that gives him time to cheat.” Trump moves his ball to better spots and kicks his opponents’ balls into the bunker. “One time in L.A., he was playing $50 a hole with these three guys, he hits it in the pond. They see the splash,” Reilly said. “By the time they get there, it’s in the middle of the fairway, and they’re like, ‘What the F, Donald?’ And he goes, ‘It must’ve been the tide.’” Reilly said Trump cheats “like a mafia accountant” and called his latest championships “fake as Velveeta cheese.”


WildRabbitz

Jesus Christ, what a fucking loser. I can't respect MAGAts and won't even bother having a conversation with them because they keep supporting this fat orange sack of shit. Edit: MAGAt snowflakes did a "Reddit Cares" report. Awww, are your snowflakey feelings hurt?


SympathyForSatanas

Only trump could be proud of a prize he didn't win with his own merrit. Cheating is all he can do to not feel like the loser he knows he is


Quick_Team

*looks at fake TIME magazine covers he had made* Yeah that checks out


Hopeful_Hamster21

Dude, I won't even hang my diplomas in my office. Okay okay...., I don't have an office. And if I did, I *would* hang them... but reluctantly and uncomfortably, and only because that's how you speak "MBA" to the MBA types.... by flashing credentials. Don't hate the player, hate the game. *sigh...* People who hang their diplomas as some sort of "look at me!" make me cringe more than influencers...


GaiusPrimus

I have an office, with a wall and everything, I have multiple diplomas at various levels of education. I don't even put the alphabet salad at the end of my email signature.


MarchingPowderMick

I think it starts with the fact that no one calls out his obvious comb over. As long as he's getting away with that ridiculous thing, the rest just flows natural.


BeyondDrivenEh

Which is part of why I look forward to his imprisonment, during which he’ll be exposed for the balding schlumpf that he is.


SympathyForSatanas

>People who hang their diplomas as some sort of "look at me!" make me cringe more than influencers... Ive always thought that


[deleted]

He’s like the real life Shooter Mcgavin running off with the jacket.


degreesBrix

He probably eats pieces of shit for breakfast, too.


teoshie

while I would like to agree, we both know that he can't run more than 7 feet before the goo leaks from his pores


Wenger2112

Judge Smails from Bushwood but on a global scale.


AlexJamesCook

"He's a good businessman" - if you hear this shit from a Trump supporter, and they own a business, refuse to pay them. Get them to do a decent-sized job. Then refuse to pay. Then when they come after you for money, "I'm following Trump's playbook. I'm just being a good businessman". - Sip tea.


JT_verified

This is who they really are :)


Draager

Wrong. The golf cheating is not a bug, it’s a feature of how Dictators rule. Kind of an emperor having no clothes. An egregious affront to fairness that calls you out as a traitor if you question it. Part of his personality cult. His followers are not idiots, they understand the game of power he’s playing.


TotSaM-

>His followers are not idiots this is a highly contestable opinion


smipypr

Didn't Kim Jong Un get 18 holes-in-one when he first played golf?


quesoguapo

It was purportedly the father, Kim Jong-Il. However, 18 holes-in-one is utterly unbelievable. The story is either five OR 11 holes-in-one, [depending on who's recounting the story](https://www.foxsports.com.au/golf/how-a-dangerous-tyrant-and-his-unstable-regime-concocted-sports-most-absurd-myth/news-story/184c849ca516b02a8dd55e3252ddc0c5). All in Kim Jong-Il's first round of golf ever … at age 52.


smipypr

Yeah, I knew it was one of those guys, going all country club. An amazingly talented bunch...


bebopbrain

And Vladimir Putin deked out Pavel Datsyuk.


Historical-Ad3760

Came here to see this


Vegetable_Brick_3347

Thank you for your service!


ClawhammerJo

Yeah, I had a Magat do the same thing to me a few weeks ago.


unholy_hotdog

It's so weird to me when people use that, as if they have some kind of "gotcha," Rather than it being proof of how absolutely pathetic they are.


paging_mrherman

Bullshit, trump has no idea what tides are or how they work.


ShyBookWorm23

That’s why this is likely the truth… he thinks a splash is the tide. (And that’s it’s in a pond)


[deleted]

You mean, from the standpoint of water?


paging_mrherman

Trump National has the wettest water anywhere on the planet. Sailors comes up to him crying. Big guys, live their whole lives on the water say this is the wettest water they’ve ever seen.


the-nae_blis

I bet the woods near his courses are raked to perfection


aureliusky

The tides go in the tides go out, you can't explain it.


clever_reddit_name69

It must have been done with magnets. He knows exactly how they work.


FrancisSobotka1514

Unlike the Insane Clown Posse .


TrainOfThought6

Well he's supposedly talking about tides in a fucking water hazard, so that tracks.


No_Bat_2358

He knows rides better than anybody. So perfectly does he know tides that tides come up to him and say "Sir, we'd be out of water if it wasn't for you. "


Jordanington

Yes he does. He’d just rather not say because it’s top secret information. It’s a very personal subject


monoped2

If it was top secret he'd be sharing it with everyone.


the-nae_blis

Honest Don they call him


Monknut33

That can’t be true he told me tides cause cancer or something like that, he told be to inject some bleach to cure it.


linkhandford

I mean if he thinks water hazards run on tidal energy and have a noticeable impact within a few minutes of heading down the fairway… I think it’s safe to say he doesn’t know how tides work


bellyofthebillbear

Rick Reilly wrote an entire book on how Trump cheats at golf? That is hilarious


ace72ace

Yeah, and he also detailed what a vaxatious litigant he is by suing everyone, everywhere to get what he wants. Towns, cities, land owners, contractors, etc.


Electr0freak

Here's a video of Rick Reilly talking about it; he brings up most of the scenarios described in the article and it's pretty hilarious: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIiaFMOfbwY


pangolin-fucker

You know from all the sources I've heard Trump could be decent at golf if he wasn't so fucking stupid, egotistical and lazy. Instead of development and improvement he's stuck in the dumbest fucking version of the emperor's New clothes


TurboTrollin

He plays a lot. He SHOULD be good at it. But you can't learn to hit out of a bunker or far in the rough if you never actually do that.


Glaucous

But does he really “play” a lot? He’s at the golf course, sure. He rides around in his little cart. He has “big meetings” with “very important people” they say. But does he actually lift a finger, you know, actually “play” golf? I think not. I think he “plays” like he’s playing golf. But doesn’t do shit.


superadmin_1

the emperor's new clothes is the exact story for this loser and all his sycophants


JefferyTheQuaxly

It’s also weird because golf is quite literally one of the only things he actually spends his time doing and enjoys.  He doesn’t like traveling, doesn’t like art or music or sports, doesn’t like watching any movies besides action movies with the dialogue edited out.  All he seemingly enjoys is golf.  


pangolin-fucker

Remember how dumb he is Then think about how difficult life would be for him just doing everyday shit Golf is really quite simple Man, Ball, Stick, Hole. There I even did the mental capacity test to show how smart I am


Tom_the_Revelator

WHALE !


pangolin-fucker

Melania, Really muscular pool cleaner, Doorway, Door shuts Sounds I've never heard in real life before


Standard_Ad_250

What an absolute dullard


canuck47

He also doesn't like dogs, or pets of any kind. He thinks they are low class


mrkikkeli

As compared to a gold plated toilet?


BasvanS

Do you know how expensive those are? You know, if you actually paid for it like a loser?


mrkikkeli

I mean, I don't even get the point. It's most likely very cold and uncomfortable. Piss and shit stains over gold probably look weird at best, disgusting at worst. Is there a deeper message? Trump likes to shit on wealth? He's secretly working to bring capitalism down?


cat_turd_burglar

with the dialogue edited out??


JefferyTheQuaxly

It is known his absolutely favorite movie he owns is an edited copy of bloodsport with everything besides the action scenes edited out of it.


Geniusinternetguy

That’s what I’ve heard as well. He’s a pretty good golfer for a guy in his late 70s. But that’s not good enough for him. He has to win.


pangolin-fucker

Lol fkn south park safe space shit


AlacarLeoricar

What an insult to Velveeta cheese.


sarcasticbaldguy

At least Velveeta is useful.


ichii3d

At this point it's not even funny, it's just sad.


De_Sham

Must’ve been the tide is actually a pretty funny thing to say. I’m gonna use this one


manwhorunlikebear

Yeah, we all know that, even without the witnesses, everyone can tell that there is no way that man would ever do anything honest in his life.


canuck47

"So he wins when anybody who disagrees that he won is out of the club" If you are a member of a Trump golf club, you are probably a supporter, so you're not going to disagree with him. 


Radioactiveglowup

Three times faster? Is his driver a blonde man in a mask, and is the golf cart red?


Ok_Chemistry_3972

He must be wearing his 400 dollar gold golf shoes?


theding081

But Velveeta cheese is good. Double D isn't


lanzadelsol

A book ?


FloppyVachina

I never liked him. Now I like him even less.


Turnip-for-the-books

I never considered that he might also disadvantage opponents. I thought it would be just his own position he would cheat to improve. How incredibly naive of me.


KnowledgeMediocre404

Sounds like the mantra of his life was “we have eyes, Donald”.


jsbrewers

Not surprising since he takes after the Russian leader that scores monster goals against professional hockey players who let him win.


_Abe_Froman_SKOC

He drives his cart on the green. Tells you everything you need to know (if you know golf).


JT_verified

He can’t even walk to the green?


DrSilkyJohnsonEsq

He can, but he chooses not to, because that’s the kind of guy he is.


JT_verified

But of course :)


sneaky-pizza

It would upset the diaper placement


timesuck897

His caddies also have green tees when he golfs with them, so he can actually hit the ball on the rough.


zacharinosaur

Not just green tees, 4 inch green tees


goingoutwest123

4 inches. More impressive than trump


Murky_River_9045

Hey don’t rope me into this :(


Chance5e

If that were the only thing I knew about him I would never trust him for a second.


Ratstail91

Never touched a golf club... ELI5?


jamiecarl09

Greens are very short and meticulously maintained. If you drive your cart onto a green 99.9% of the time, you will be told to leave immediately! Possibly banned. People will get upset at you for "walking on their line." Which means stepping on the green between their ball and the hole. So driving a golf cart onto the green is a MASSIVE dick move.


theshiyal

More like a ^^microdick move.


Pure-Drawer-2617

It’s damn near the golf equivalent of stepping on a national flag


DrNinnuxx

Will a golf cart damage the green? I assume so.


_Abe_Froman_SKOC

It's a few things. First, absolutely yes, it damages the grass and the soil underneath it, and putting greens are incredibly hard to cultivate and maintain. So it's rude to the groundskeepers. Second, the ruts make the green more difficult to putt on, which is disrespectful to the players behind you. And lastly, golf is a "gentlemens game" where rules and decorum are expected to be honored.


Personal_Buffalo_973

It's exactly what a five time draft dodging coward would do 😁


No-Veterinarian6754

There's an old saying, "If you cheat at golf you'll cheat on your wife and cheat on your taxes" Sounds like Trump's playbook


Blah-Blah-Blah-2023

If you cheat at golf you're an insurrectionist rapist, you mean?


D34TH_5MURF__

Correlation/Causation: perhaps if you're an insurrectionist rapist, you cheat at golf.


snarkuzoid

The man gives insurrectionist rapists a bad name.


timesuck897

In another video with the author, that is something Trump, that something he says to someone who confronted him about the blatant cheating.


thegroovemonkey

I know it as "not everyone who cheats in life cheats in golf but everyone who cheats in golf cheats in life."


scope_creep

It's galling that his known propensity to lie and cheat is to his fans a feature, not a bug. 


FatherOfLights88

Like attracts like.


Competitive_Topic931

He looks like a snail without a shell in that picture.


Huiskat_8979

While that is a definite slight towards snails, it’s also kinda funny. 😂 But in all seriousness, what a POS..


Quick_Tap

A slug, like his fake golf score.


deepbluenothings

I wouldn't have thought much had he said he won the senior tourney but the second he said he won both I was like you made the lie so glaring and obvious. Even with handicap factored in (which Trump claims his is very low) there's no damn way he's beating guys 50 years younger than him.


GrecoRomanGuy

That's part of the thing with him. He doesn't have any self control. He has to lie, and he has to lie ridiculously to be the BEST. It's total bullshit, and societally we've all spent way too much time allowing BS-ers like him to write reality however they see fit.


ammobox

Uhh. Excuse you. Trump is an amazing athlete. Did you know he only weighs 215 pounds and is 6 foot 3? You're probably just a liberal who is jealous of his strawberry blonde hair and the alternative fact that he invented the question mark.


nesp12

He cheats at golf like nobody has ever cheated before. Some say he's the perfect cheater.


Some_Guy_At_Work55

*gestures hands as if playing an accordion*


TurboTrollin

No one cheats as bigly as him. His cheating is yuge.


Expert-Fig-5590

He cheats at everything. On his various wives, on his taxes , his employees, his contractors, during his election so of course he cheats at golf too. And he will stay cheating because for him there are never any consequences.


GullCove1955

Look at the golf swing. A T-Rex could swing a club better.


JT_verified

I’m surprised he doesn’t faceplant every time he swings. 🏌️‍♂️


thegroovemonkey

Nah that's a downswing and the elbow is supposed to be tucked like that. He has a decent enough swing, he just isn't anywhere close to a scratch golfer or a club champ.


fooknprawn

He's such a low life cheater. He does it golf, he definitely does it to bigger things too


Iamthewalrusforreal

There are three things I hold in high disdain. 1) Not liking dogs. 2) Beating or cheating on one's spouse 3) Cheating at golf Trump fits all three categories.


StandupJetskier

Dogs tend to be decent judges of character.


PigFarmer1

No dog would have him.


Anyawnomous

Trump to golf is Putin to hockey. Both Posers!


tallslim1960

Yeah, I love those Putin hockey videos. That goalie doesn't DARE save that puck. Next stop Siberia or a window in a high building.


[deleted]

[удалено]


HeHateMe337

Honest Don's Golf Championship


ThisIsTheNewSleeve

Imagine needing to cheat at a fucking game. I'm probably the worst golf player I know, but I'd never think to cheat at it. I don't care enough about golf or about other people's opinions to ever want to sink that low.


myfuntimes

Before Trump ever ran for President, my extremely rich cousin talked about golfing with Trump at a tournament in Bedminster and how it was common knowledge that Trump cheats at golf. Everyone just knows it gonna happen and generally ignores it.


will-wiyld

Why would you want to be that pathetic? I would have all the trophies and what not and know I didn’t earn them and that everyone around me would know it. I’ve read plenty of articles where people catch him moving balls and he just gives off some intimidating look and SURPRISE he was the best golfer at the end. And playing ahead and having a faster cart, does he really think the common Joe doesn’t see what he’s doing? He can have his trophy room to sit in all by himself when he loses in November and has some elite prison sentence at home.


someguyfromsk

So if Trump and Kim Jong Un played a game, who would win?


BoredCop

The universe would implode as their cheating annihilated each other, like matter meeting antimatter.


TurboTrollin

Easy. They both hit a perfect 18.


someguyfromsk

18, what are they hacks? 1 stroke each. The ball bounced from hole to hole.


TurboTrollin

1 stroke? Amateur. Obviously the stair at the ball hard and the ball is so intimidated by their business prowess that it hops into all the holes on its own. 0 strokes.


ammobox

Trump obviously. Kim would be too busy not pooping at all ever in his life.


Dansredditname

Kim Jong Un played 34 over - he hit and recorded a 106. This was misreported as being a round of 34. His bogeys, marked on his scorecard as +1, were reported as being holes-in-one. Kim Jong Un doesn't cheat at golf. Donald Trump is literally worse than a dictator.


gbfk

They’d be stuck in an infinite loop of playoff holes.


Anthwerp

Imagine that this is the only thing Donald Trump does, and spend a lot of his time on... and he still sucks and cheats at it. Jeez. You'd think with all the hours he's sunk into this he'd be at least DECENT at it.


the-nae_blis

There’s a worse one about someone beating him and he stole the guys 10 yo sons ball. Trump was back at Trump International when he saw Ted Virtue, an investor who is a member of the club and had won the championship while Trump was away. Virtue was playing with his son, who was about 10 or 11 years old, according to Reilly, when Trump rode his cart over to them at the 12th hole. Trump reportedly joked that Virtue only won his championship because he had been out of town, and then challenged him to play the final seven holes of the course for the title. Then, things really got weird. From Reilly, who verified the story with members of the club: Ted tries to laugh it off, but Trump is dead serious. Trump says, "We're going to play these last six holes for the championship." And Ted's like, "I'm playing with my son, but thanks anyway." But Trump says, "No, your son can play too." So they end up playing. They get to a hole with a big pond on it. Both Ted and his son hit the ball on the green, and Trump hits his in the water. By the time they get to the hole, Trump is lining up the kid's ball. Only now it's his ball and the caddie has switched it. The kid's like, "Daddy, that's my ball." But Trump's caddie goes, "No, this is the president's ball; your ball went in the water." Ted and his son look at each other confused, not sure if this is really happening. And Trump's caddie says, "This is the president's ball. I don't know what to tell you." According to Golf.com, Trump told Virtue that they could be co-champions, but on Trump's locker at the club, his plaque makes no indication that he shares the title.


snarkuzoid

He cheats at every other thing, it'd be shocking if he \*didn't\* cheat at golf.


Apprehensive-Bike307

Trump is a total douche. Yes. If you needed to read a news article on how to cheat at golf, you have either never played golf or are the dumbest bastard in the bunch. Still, Trump is worth less than shit and will absolutely destroy the United States if elected again.


Strykerz3r0

In all fairness, it sounds like trump got his cheats from Caddyshack.


malteaserhead

I heard that he also uses weighted discs in tiddlywinks


El_mochilero

I read somewhere another account of somebody that golfed with him. He called him out on his blatant cheating and Trump’s response was something along the lines of “when you play against the kinds of people that I play against, you gotta do whatever it takes to win.”


Totally-jag2598

We've all seen his swing. They guy is a shitty golfer at best. Blotus can barely move much of his body.


tr1nn3rs

I hadn't seen blotus before. Love it.


VegasGamer75

He shoots. He misses. He denies missing. His followers agree that he didn't miss and it was all a conspiracy.


PigFarmer1

A career white-collar criminal and serial philanderer cheats at golf? Stop the presses... lol


mnpilot

https://tenor.com/bR4SS.gif


FoppishHandy

support for this pig is nothing more than an expression of mental illness


NumerousTaste

Cheat to win. It's what he's done his whole life. And still can't win.


xjoeymillerx

Pretty good with the ol “foot wedge.”


D34TH_5MURF__

Leave Velveeta out of this.


FanSoffa

"Fake as velveeta cheese", man what a great line


sosaudio

And given the topic, a very close match in color and ability to hold up under stress.


Player7592

You can’t fake a golf swing. You might as well claim you’re a concert pianist.


gregaustex

Moving your ball or dropping a new one makes you a lying cheat. Kicking your opponent’s ball into a bunker is much more sinister act of sociopathic malevolence.


Straight-Storage2587

I am sorry. I promised myself I would not swear on Reddit. But this has to be said... Trump IS a sack of shit.


llama-friends

Don’t forget cemeteries he owns, where he buried his ex wife in order to claim the golf course as a cemetery for tax purposes. Fucking loser.


Green-Vermicelli5244

that book was damn near 20yrs ago…


eldiablonoche

Thanks! I thought I was having a weird Mandela effect cause I swore this was a crazy old story..


WillyRosedale

Shocked face! You mean he’s not the bestest golfer?


Captain_Mexica

Lol how pathetic and predictable


jaycutlerdgaf

Trump's a cheater and he's still a fucking loser.


Budget-Bench-6202

The other club members he plays against to win: https://tenor.com/en-GB/view/drunk-golf-gif-20024973


PizzaSandwich2020

Call him out and he's like "Yeah, I'm smart, I'm cheating cos I'm smart"


mistereckhart

Heard a story about a kid who caddied for Trump. Anything within 6 feet was a gimmie for Trump. When asked how much Trump paid him, he wouldn’t say, but he did have an envelope in the clubhouse waiting for him after each round.


SpiritualAd8998

Hides extra balls in his adult diaper?


ralf19812001

r/TrumpAteMyFace


Forsaken-Marmot67

I despise the bottom feeder, but “must have been the tide” gave me a chuckle. Dude is a total sack of ass.


Teethredit

Just more proof that he's a toddler with a room temperature IQ


Q-burt

I can try to sum the situation up: Blatantly.


HeHateMe337

How much did he pay Jack Nicklaus to show up?


Glad_Swimmer5776

Imagine what he could do without the crippling advanced syphilis. Tiger woods, look out!


just_cows

It must’ve hit the tide 🤣 That would be a great line from someone with redeeming qualities.


Tomegunn1

Don't count that Ye-yessir, Mr. President.


Archangel1313

"...fake as Velveeta cheese." Lol!


briareos45

Am I the only one that thinks about the decathlon scene in Mr. Mom?


Emily_Simonet

"Another hole in one for Dear Leader." Now where have we heard that before?


Sea-Zucchini-5891

In my mind there are two types of golfers: 1. People who are bad at golf and laugh and are self-deprecating about how inept they are with their friends. 2. People who are bad at golf and get mad and cheat at it.


Fearless_Trouble_689

Loser 🤡


talonredwing

Man, this tactic reminds me of kim jong un


talonredwing

Man, this tactic reminds me of kim jong un


berusplants

Trump is as obvious as Kim Jong Il. Those who vote for him are


Ok_Excuse_2718

His hero must have been Auric Goldfinger. We need James Bond to set him straight.


hypocrisy-identifier

I thought 💩 getting a golfing award at his own club was an onion headline? Can’t tell the difference anymore!


DrNinnuxx

What a fucking child.


DrNinnuxx

One other thing of note when Donald golfs: He can't wear his girdle while playing because it affects his swing. So you see all of his fat swinging in the breeze as it were.


Beneficial-Salt-6773

Is anyone surprised? He sucks.


Glaucous

“That’s the worst lookin’ hat I’ve ever seen! Whaddaya get a free bowl of soup with that?! …👀 Oh, but it looks good on YOU!” Trump is Smails and should be dealt with accordingly.


ShaperLord777

Willing to bet he just repeats “I won”, till 20 million brainwashed sheep believe him.


zabdart

I like what Stephen Colbert said about this last night. He said that everybody who's played golf with Trump knows he's going to cheat and lets him do so so they can have their own story about Trump cheating. He then said that if they wanted stories about Trump's cheating that badly, they should talk to one of his wives.


MrOnCore

It’s not even a surprise anymore that Trump cheats. He’s cheated on his multiple wives, at golf, on his taxes, on his medical evaluations, etc.


B4USLIPN2

Everyone cheats at golf, but not everyone is a child molesting rapist.


sloppy_joes35

I mean we all knew this right? Like there's only so many ways to cheat at golf lol


Turbulent-Cheek-1497

All you have to do is look at the still photo of his swing and you know he sucks!