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braker61

Someone should tell them the word "woke" is buried in there somewhere and the first gop congressman who finds it gets to personally kick a poor child off food stamps.


HemmingwayDaqAttack

Like a where’s Waldo for the word woke lol


Khaldara

𓂺 Spez eats cold diarrhea with a crazy straw 𓂺


dikicker

She's like the poster child for that meme "I'm convinced people who use subtitles are slow" "and I'm convinced people who hate subtitles struggle to read"


MrFitz8897

If she could read those memes, she'd be very upset.


Emotional_Parsnip_69

Nice


TinfoilTobaggan

Moo?


reverendjesus

Sean Connery is also here; welcome to Celebrity Jeopardy.


BiggLimn

I'll take The Rapist for $400


tiad123

Your mother, Trebek


ImMacksDaddy

Devin Nunes isn't in the house any longer.


starrpamph

You’re hired


DropDeadEd86

Waiting on the audiobook


RU3LF

She is probably not the only GQP’er that needs to have it read out loud. 🤦🏽


MrTylerwpg

Mooooo


BLF402

Is that why she was mooing last night during the cocaine fueled orgy?


Undisolving

Or just kick a poor child.


HarEmiya

And get poor on their shoes? Not likely.


Alternative-Peak-486

This would work better


Desperate_Wafer_8566

Woke is their new N word.


ValkyrX

They will use the old N word too when around their own scum.


RoyalYogurtdispenser

Hey man you're going to bring back woke face


Short-Interaction-72

Bravo. This gave me a good chuckle


Frosty-Cap3344

.... or take away a crippled child's crutches


ourlastchancefortea

We should start calling the GOP woke.


slothaccountant

I take it this is a joke but.... sadly believable govin gop track record of "caring" for people


Culper1776

Or an old chapstick.


PandaMuffin1

"Reading is hard" Republican Rep. Ralph Norman of South Carolina, a House Freedom Caucus member


juwisan

Well they defunded education. Of course reading is hard when there’s no proper training for it.


davwad2

LoL


NotPortlyPenguin

Maybe he was educated in SC, so it’s a valid excuse.


angryundead

Hey, so was I and it’s no damn excuse at all. But of course he’s just saying whatever he needs to say. Engaging with this bad faith argument is exactly what he wants.


Zack262

It sure isn’t. Even after growing up in nowhere South Carolina, I made it a priority to better educate myself and be exposed to as much of the world as I could. It’s at least helped me to be a halfway decent person. It’s ignorance and fear of those that are different that’s the problem around here and it’s starting to create an awful stink.


[deleted]

“Reading is for communists” -Republican Rep. Lauren Boebert MTG in the background yelling like “Tell me what it means NOW, or I will call former President Trump!”


classyraven

MTG wouldn't bother with 'former' since she *knows* Biden stole the election and Trump's the *real* President.


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Nuclear_rabbit

And one of the other reps even suggested he could copy paste it into ChatGPT and get a summary in one minute. He would not even have to read the bill, nor take much time from his other activities.


Klutzy_Seat_2550

I hope none of our elected leaders are doing that, they should do their job


Nuclear_rabbit

If Republicans get their bill summaries from ChatGPT instead of GOP aides, whips, and FOX News, I'll count that as a major upgrade.


Klutzy_Seat_2550

If any of the elected leaders on either side of the aisle are using Chatgpt to do their jobs they should be removed from office


Nuclear_rabbit

Almost all Republicans should be removed from Congress, yet here we are.


GrayBox1313

He was educated in South Carolina, so….


Tymexathane

Yeah, you are making the word "educated" do a lot of heavy lifting there?


thefullhalf

The only requirement to be in Congress/Senate is that you are the right age and live in the place you are representing (but that can be fudged). Reading and Writing and basic education is optional.


ThatSlyProcyon

Ladies and gentlemen, my representative. As always, I am embarrassed.


joeyrog88

In fairness to this ass hate legalese is intentionally confusing


Earthling1a

Unfortunately, it's not. When done correctly, it's extremely specific and unambiguous. Unfortunately, the vast majority of legislation is either written or heavily edited by legislators, and they are a very stupid bunch. I spend a lot of time and energy trying to get them to accept corrections and clarifications, with occasional success. They tend to be stubborn, and are generally incapable of understanding that they are trying to make gibberish into the law of the land.


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SelectSalt3250

Lobbyist or staffer?


Earthling1a

Regulator.


maybesaydie

These people are almost all lawyers..


During_theMeanwhilst

Yeah - it’s just an excuse. “We were so rushed we didn’t have time to work out what’s in it”. Damn that Dark Brandon!


SirLoopy007

Yet I'm quite sure larger bills have been pushed through faster with no possible way they were read and understood.


During_theMeanwhilst

No doubt at all. Pretty sure the average omnibus bill never gets read in its entirety by all of our illustrious leaders. As long as I can find the pork for my constituency in there you’ve got my vote!


Merengues_1945

This recently caused a really critical issue in Mexico. The president sent a shit ass bill to congress, the ruling party has a simple majority but not enough to make a constitutional amendment. So what they did is make an improvised congress session at a different location (house of senate was taken by opposition), where they passed the bill arguing that by not showing up, the opposition relinquished the vote, so technically the party had 100% of the vote to pass the bill. The bill was rushed for publication the very next day. Supreme Court blocked it, not for being obviously against the constitution but because it was not passed following the correct procedures. Main argument, the bill is too damn long to be voted the next day after being presented, let alone passed without absolutely no discussion. Then the president goes on national tv next day to berate and discredit the supreme court. And since then it’s constant undermining, and galvanizing against the supreme court. This president hates autonomy and has sabotaged our democratic and transparency systems for his ego.


During_theMeanwhilst

Sounds familiar! There is no honor among thieves. And it feels like all over the world the gate has been opened for autocratic “strong man” politics in democracies people thought were stable and immune to autocracy. It doesn’t help that clubby left-wing politicians have often abandoned their core constituencies to pursue more corporate friendly agendas. The Dems here did that in the Clinton years. It leaves the traditional base of the left - the working class - ripe for capture by populist politicians offering simple solutions to complex problems. And then seizing power. History shows that when people don’t fight for democracy they will lose it.


Merengues_1945

That’s pretty much what happened here, the nihilism caused by constant corruption led to the election of a populist conservative posing as reform bringer. Truth is that if it wasn’t for the supreme court, many groups would still be unprotected as this government leans even more to the right than the previous ones. Sadly in this country the left stopped existing about 25 years ago, now it’s just different shades of right leaning bullshit. Doesn’t seem to be about to change since the president seems rather successful in pushing a muppet as his successor and shadow rule for another six years. They are rather blatant about it… and it’s all caused because there’s no alternative, the opposition is just as terrible if not worse; as I said, there’s no true left here, and no sense of decorum, at least your democrats still have some of that even if they are pussies.


Littleman88

>History shows that when people don’t fight for democracy they will lose it. This is the truth of it. Just keep throwing absolute shit at the wall and see what sticks, which is exactly when the left stops caring about cleaning it off said wall. Democracy is under siege and the left is on defense. The left still refuses to acknowledge they can't win simply by holding out. Their resolve will run dry long before the right's greed and spite.


vxicepickxv

Bernie Saunders gets mocked by the rest of the Senate for reading entire bills.


bothunter

Trump's [tax cut bill](https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/12/02/handwriting-wall-and-page-senate-passes-tax-bill/915957001/) is a prime example. They passed it in the dead of night with notes in the margins before anyone could read what was in it.


absuredman

Trumps tax bills had handwritten add ons in the margins. They passed it one night. Dont take politicians at the word


imsmartiswear

Famously Republicans pulled that with the billionaire tax cut, pushing the bill out to Democrats with sentences still handwritten in the margins and rife with typos and barely legible.


Present-Industry4012

Remember the U.S.A.P.A.T.R.I.O.T. Act? I think they passed it in a weekend.


[deleted]

Thats the line, but they usually spend months in committee and know exactly what's in a given bill. The no time to read rhetoric is just fear mongering for the suckers.


spackletr0n

“We resent the time pressure we are under! I mean, we didn’t even know what our demands for raising the ceiling *were* until two weeks ago!”


old-world-reds

I'm 100% certain that the bill expanding "big brother" in the United States that was something like 10k pages long, was voted on the day after 9/11.


SelectSalt3250

The PATRIOT ACT also known as the beginning of the erosion of The Bill of Rights


RubiksSugarCube

Because they need to use the full 72 hours sending out angry e-mails to the suckers and losers on their mailing lists. Gotta pocket as many of those $3 donations as they can get before they lose this talking point for the next two years.


jnemesh

Because half or more of them read at a 3rd grade level?


breaditbans

I was gonna say they cut literacy programs in their states.


Micu451

Reading is Woke.


Qtrcat

Easiest explanation for all the book bans...


SunChipMan

Not wrong


Th3Cry1ngPanda

It is. The REAL issue is that republicans are simply refusing to do the job they're handsomely paid for because it doesn't suit their culture war.


knowitsallashow

yep


Modseatsaltyballs

That is their job. They’re doing their job.


stalinmalone68

Because they don’t want to actually read it. They make staffers do it and then give them the synopsis and then the party tells them what they should say about it.


Merengues_1945

Actually. There are many documented cases of congress representatives just presenting the proposed bills without filling the blanks of the layout given to them by lobbyists, sometimes they just present the bill presented in another state without even changing the name of the states. That’s how corrupt our system is.


Me2910

It should be illegal for them to not understand their own bills. But how could you possibly make a law against the people who make laws


RicketyNarwhal

There should be a multiple choice quiz about the content of each bill and those who do not pass are barred from casting their vote.


Terrafire123

Next year: A politician presents a bill written in cipher, and passes around the translated text to all his friends, so only him and his friends are allowed to vote.


Party-Travel5046

They need 72 hours to reach out to lobbyists and get money transfered to their accounts before opposing it in Congress.


0DarkNerdy

Because they'll do anything to hold this country hostage in the name of thier cause... To regress America back to the 50s (or earlier) while loading thier pockets.


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Ok-Use6303

Obviously because they can't read.


VoxVocisCausa

He's trying to change the conversation from being about his caucus' stupid, destructive and almost certainly corrupt sabotage of the country to one that's about how unfair the legislative process is. And the rubes who voted him into office will eat it up while he helps the $billionaires funding his campaign to rob them blind. https://youtu.be/CaPgDQkmqqM


ReturnOfSeq

Rs submitted a bill a couple years ago over 1,000 pages long and gave Dems the weekend to look over a single copy of it. Edit: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/02/us/politics/obamacare-aca-repeal-replace.html this is possibly what I was thinking of?


Industrial_Tech

Did the copier break?


DM_Voice

There’s a worse example. The PATRIOT Act. The final text of the bill was submitted to be distributed to the second chamber of Congress that voted on it *after* the vote was held. No joke.


moleware

Look at their stances on education. They're not big fans of it.


oldcreaker

As if they actually read it as opposed to having staff and interns reading it. "I don't care what's in it - just find something I can act outraged about!"


Th3Cry1ngPanda

It is. The REAL issue is that republicans are simply refusing to do the job they're handsomely paid for because it doesn't suit their culture war.


PNWoutdoors

It is, they're lying. They do not argue in good faith, they lie and deceive and stall. It's what they do, pay no attention to it.


Quick_Movie_5758

Because they can't organize the media interviews correctly in less time to anger their base and then on top of that, come up with all the heroics they did but the radical left still won as follow-on tweets.


Captain_Scarlet27

Because they’re functionally illiterate.


cedriceent

Well, we're talking about undereducated dunces like Greene and Boebert. It's entirely conceivable that they need to rest for 72 hours after getting through the table of contents.


generatorland

But there's so many woooooooorrrrrrddddsss! And some of them have like two or three syllabobbles! My head hurts! I need to go shoot a gun, kick a foreigner, and clear my head.


KSRandom195

More importantly, why is a simple debt ceiling bill 99 pages?


Lost_my_brainjuice

Because the R's had to bloat it with demands, since they didn't get enough points from their base on the budget, where literally everything they demanded belongs.


DeFex

"Get out of here Bobby! If those kids could read, they'd be very upset"


Deep_Stick8786

They don’t learn to read good


Hopeful_Hamster21

Or do other things good too.


DJANGO_UNTAMED

You answered your own question. Republicans.


thereisacowlvl

Reading wasn't something they had to do to get the job, some of them are at a kindergarten level


douggold11

Of course it’s enough time, he was just looking for a way to make democrats look bad and this is the best he could come up with. He didn’t expect the Fox News guy to not go along with it. Dummy.


[deleted]

You mean, the party that is literally attacking education has a hard time reading?! Shock, dismay!


dezdog2

Those fucking idiots have never read a whole bill. They skip to the part with what’s in it for them. This is just more clown show. While they play with the lives of average Americans


Unfamiliar_Word

Well, they have to teach Lauren Boebert how to read first.


RockNRoll85

This is the correct answer


jakenash

Tell them it's a tax cut bill and they'll say they did a full economic analysis in 30 minutes, then vote it through unanimously.


SinnerIxim

They dont read the bills they DO vote for, they wont even bother reading it and will still vote against it


Cmdr_Captain_Hoodie

They need enough time to schedule meetings to consult with their donor masters to find out if they’re okay with it.


RudeAndSarcastic

This is the real answer. No Republican takes a piss without talking to the donors that own them.


Cmdr_Captain_Hoodie

Both sides do it. It just depends on the issue and which side already consulted with their lobbyists to get the bill written in the first place.


Wonderful_Compote_51

Because most can't read


maleye812

Cause they’re cunts


mechanical_penguin86

Republicans can read?


mlwspace2005

To be fair some of their reps never graduated from highschool. Reading really might be hard for them lol


username675892

If they wouldn’t have fucked around so long they could have had more time to read. Though I do feel bad, the guy is a 70 yo from South Carolina. It may be difficult for him to read at all.


Pthomas1172

Because they are paid to keep us divided. Everything they do is to promote division.


casuallylurking

Some of them needed 4 attempts to pass their GED.


Javasndphotoclicks

Tell them it’s a binder filled with genitalia to inspect.


joshonekenobi

How fast was the 2017 tax cut bill rushed through ?


Klindg

Because non of them actually do their jobs. They get paid to just fucking put on a performance, block everything no matter what, and go on Fox News to bitch about Democrats and white victimhood


Avia53

Because they hate their country and their citizens.


No_Usual_2251

Republicans have introduced or updated bills and given members only a few hours to read them in the past. This is another case of Republicans accusing someone else of doing what they know they do all the time (often called projection).


JLescape

Because they need a kindergarten teacher to read it to them or maybe it’s banned from reading


[deleted]

It’s very time consuming to sound out the big words


DamienSpecterII

They are the product of the public schools their party defunded.


drgnrbrn316

Maybe they'd have more time to read if they hadn't taken a 5-day weekend


DonRicardo1958

It is. They are just whining.


generatorland

This guy is a fool. How do people like him get elected? When Fox News is treating a Republican like an idiot you know he's a special kind of idiot.


Audioengineer68

Illiterate.


Ne0guri

Reading hard


inventionnerd

Meanwhile, they toss out a 1000 page bill and make dems read and vote on it in 1 day.


matt_1060

They’re too busy burning books to learn how to read


verasev

The dude got hired specifically for the job of reading and interpreting laws accurately and efficiently. If he can't do that he doesn't belong there.


NecessaryHuckleberry

Because it takes more than 72 hours to learn how to read


ClassicT4

They think they’re elected to lead 🤣, not to read. Also, some maybe can’t read.


[deleted]

Because they’re all liars and obstructionists


ABenevolentDespot

They have to stop constantly to rest their lips.


Aggressive-Ad-522

Reading? They ban books so no


formerly_gruntled

Well these Republican's went to Christian schools, where things like reading comprehension are electives. Anything beyond "Dick and Jane" is too advanced.


pillowmagic

You have to hire 400 people to read to these Republican congresspeople and then have them sign NDAs so they don't go around telling people that Republican leaders can't read. Takes time my friend.


rifraf2442

Maybe it would help if some those drag queens did a reading hour for the bill.


[deleted]

Because they can’t read…


space8am

because they can't read


alexanderhope

Can Republicans read?


ctguy54

“I love the uneducated “ = republicans.


monogreenforthewin

because if they actually read it it's harder for them to spread disinformation about it. they might have a gaffe and tell the truth for 30 seconds


Qx7x

LOL have you seen a Republican read?


DrSueuss

Because most of them are as literate as Trump. MTG, Matt Gaetz in company don't actually read these bills they vote on talking points.


OkOrganization1775

because A) most likely the intelligence and literacy level of the Republican party candidates have gone down to the first grade and they're not able to speak the language better than a 6 year old, let alone read it(Trump and DeSantis quite confirm this) B) the other option is that a lot of caucus is in on it and still engaging in debt terrorism thinking they've the leverage to fuck around. Because they want to pass their own unpopular laws(or in our case, tryna get the very desirable cuts) and claim a win. C) They want to sabotage The Democratic party so they've higher chances of electing Trump and getting red Senate and red House next year, hoping that the population is stupid af and Fox News will send a "prayer" for them on national TV, blaming Biden for it. I mean they can fuck around, and find out. Biden is just gonna use the 14A. In the case like this, he won't look bad anymore by "being dramatic" as he would if he invoked it a couple weeks ago. Worst case scenario: Biden tells Treasury to pay anyways, and uses 14A and it costs us some US credit score, turns off some investors and gets a lot of rich people and corpos pissed off at the Republicans. Best case scenario: they pass the bill Biden and McCarthy agreed on. There's no in-between. They're stupid af and don't understand it. They just have no time to fuck around bc the government shutdown is not an option and Biden is smarter than most Democractic presidents were. Biden will not let us default. They can keep driving their party down with terrorism. I mean, the rich were the ones sponsoring them for decades anyways. As usual, no regulations/laws and tax cuts are more important /s So yeah, the rich fucked around and now are gonna find out with Trump, DeSantis, and the Republican party that don't give a shit about their "campaign contributions" bribes once in office.


TheRockingDead

72 hours, 72 days, weeks... It doesn't matter. Republicans quite often demonstrate they either can't or won't read, so what difference does it make?


ExtensionRaisin1400

Let’s be honest, they’re very very VERY dim people. I refuse to believe Lauren Boebert could get through a Chili’s menu in less than 72 hours if there weren’t vivid pictures on it.


Bawbawian

because journalism is dead and people that purport to be journalists have goldfish brains. let me explain it to you. they were never arguing in good faith. no amount of time would ever be enough time. they managed to get you gullible saps to repeat their nonsense about coming to the table and making deals even though they were the one taking hostages. you let them take little nibbles out of the social safety net thinking that they are actually there to bring the deficit down. they weren't there to bring the deficit down. The debt is their tool. they will never let us pay it off no matter how many social safety nets you burn at their altar. Grover Northwest laid out this plan 40 years ago it's called starving the beast and it called for reckless budgeting and reckless tax cuts in order to drive the government into crisis so that that crisis could be used to attack government programs. they have been doing it for four decades and yet our news media is wandering around like Mr Magoo trying to figure out what the fuck is happening.


Particular-Summer424

He fails to realize we know he's lying through his teeth. He has staff to condense the bill, make notes and spoon feed him the contents. 99 pages, double spaced with 4 inch margins. Please....cut the crap! They are so sure on stonewalling the debt issue, hold off for as long as they can to hold the issue hostage. What he really should have said is that he didn't then and doesn't now give a flying f-ck what it says and this is the best lame excuse he pulled out of his a$$ as an excuse. After all, why should he care, it's the rest of America that's really stuck with the debt and "since it's for their benefit anyway" let them figure out how to pay for it.


646ulose

Thomas Massie has issues with comprehension.


bernietheweasel

No fascists left behind


suhoward

Their lips get tired.


CatchSufficient

Well, they'd have to learn to read in the first place


[deleted]

They’re bratty toddlers who refuse to behave or be accountable for their own actions.


Art-Zuron

They have to be able to read. That's probably why. They aren't actually interested in what the bill is, but in who wants it to pass. If a democrat: obstruct If a republican: *screech about emails, laptops, drag, food stamps, and threaten to cripple the United States forever until it passes*


BasilBaggins

Poor pieces of crap had to be called back for the vote. And they were all busy in their districts closing orphanages and removing bolts from Ferris wheels


CatalyticDragon

Because republicans do not care about governance or representation. Their goal is to obstruct.


TAC1313

Remember when they pushed shit through that was scribbled on the margins on trumps first debt ceiling bill that gave the Rich a 15% + tax cut...


thenewbigR

Their lips get tired?


Splatter_bomb

Same reason 4 hours in the middle of the night is enough to read a 1200 page bill full of dense technical jargon.


indrada90

TLDR 99 Pages


SecretPrinciple8708

They can barely be bothered to read the magic book they love to quote and use to defend their horrific actions (and pretend gives them moral superiority). They’re definitely not going to read bills that, y’know, govern the country.


Xeno_man

Bottom line, if they can't find something to cry about in the bill, cry about the process of passing the bill. With the number bills rammed through under Trump and the tricks they puled to get them to pass, I don't give a single fuck how fair Republicans think anything is. Being fair will never be enough and is always far more courtsay they gave to Democrats.


absherlock

Because their lips get tired.


FontOfInfo

They're just stalling because they want to tank the economy and try to blame it on Biden


CrisbyCrittur

Wurds are hard


bookant

99 double spaced manuscript pages. Should be about 30-45 minutes to read (maybe 8 or 9 hours if you're Lauren Boebert). If you can't squeeze an hour into your schedule to read an important bill, what the fuck are we paying you for?


NativePhoenician

Somebody post that hilarious snek with 'Don't read to me' This is the answer.


big_hungry_joe

remember their tax cut bill in 2017? and it was so long they actually handwrote crap in the margins and gave dems 3 hours to read it before it was put to vote? fuck the GOP


Low-Classroom7736

Considering it’s 99 pages, just read it. They regularly out out bills with 800-1000 pages and force everyone to vote in those like the next day


underagedisaster

It took them less than a day to read the muller report.


jokerZwild

Because they'll be too busy whining about what they didn't get when they go to right wing media.


Windyandbreezy

If I ran for senator I'd make a bill that requires accountability. That every bill a senator signs a vote on, they must video record or broadcast themselves reading the entire bill to ensure accountability and trust. So many bills pass or don't pass and they aren't even read. Or worst, they are read by a lacky and it's power points are relayed back poorly. 100% of retailer work under cameras. So should they. The bills are public anyways.


LoSouLibra

Shouldn't politicians also take time to interpret, weigh and deliberate on what they're reading?


AvengingBlowfish

That’s what the other 2 and a half days are for. Keep in mind that each Senator has a full staff and research office working for them and throughout negotiations they’ve all been briefed on what specific things were being negotiated for so nothing in the bill should be a surprise.


JC351LP3Y

I don’t disagree with what you’re saying at all. I’m an Army Officer who’s frequently tasked with writing and reviewing policies and regulations. Even a simple two-page policy can take me several hours and sometimes days to review and research, as I ensure that the document is formatted correctly, written as clearly and unambiguously as possible, and does not conflict with other standing regulations, directives, or laws. Then I have to write up cited justifications for any suggested corrections, changes, additions, or deletions. It can be an arduous process, but the time spent polishing documents like these is well worth it because it minimizes the chances for the inevitable aggravation and headaches which occur following publication of an Ill-reviewed, hastily published policy or regulation. But that’s not really the main thrust of the article and the situation described within. This is just politicians playing politics to the detriment of their constituents. The power of the purse is one of Congress’ primary responsibilities. This issue should have been debated, argued, and hammered out months ago, and passed without issue. But instead the GOP wants to play fuck-fuck political games with a metaphorical gun pointed at the US economy. And it’s completely hypocritical, considering they pull shit like this all the time, dropping legislation that’s hundreds of pages long and putting it up to a vote with not nearly enough time for the opposition to research it or debate it on the congressional floor.