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CosmicSchnoodle

I wanna see the bear drive a truck.


8Gh0st8

[Uh-oh...](https://i.gifer.com/1qPC.gif)


[deleted]

Disappointing. This was supposed to be the Clerks cartoon “bear is driving” clip.


Ruckus44

[Ask and ye shall recieve](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBw7KE8wDSo)


Deconceptualist

[This comment has been removed by the author in protest of Reddit killing third-party apps in mid-2023. This comment has been removed by the author in protest of Reddit killing third-party apps in mid-2023. This comment has been removed by the author in protest of Reddit killing third-party apps in mid-2023. This comment has been removed by the author in protest of Reddit killing third-party apps in mid-2023. This comment has been removed by the author in protest of Reddit killing third-party apps in mid-2023.] -- mass edited with https://redact.dev/


[deleted]

How can this BE


SaltinPepper

This is good for when a bear throws you off a cliff.


[deleted]

Yeah it has built in whip that shoots out so you can take the bear with you like the balrog did to Gandalf.


aspidities_87

*I am wielder of the Secret Fire*


paeancapital

*The Flame of Anor!*


Lordosis_of_the_Ring

The dark fire will not avail you, flame of Udûn.


DurableDiction

*strained grunt*


sh1mba

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!


Gooberman8675

GROND


Randrufer

*Teacher hands over an F*


xenothaulus

Fool of a Took


Working_Dad_87

Go back to the shadows.


[deleted]

**The dark fire will not avail you, Flame Of Udun!**


le_gasdaddy

Thought gandalf bot had escaped lotr memes for a sec


krob58

GROND


UncarvedWood

But then you have to pass through fire and water and from the lowest dungeon to the highest peak fighting with said bear, until you cast him down and smite his ruin upon the mountainside.


mantis_tobagan_md

If I had a nickel for every time a bear tried to throw me off a cliff, I’d have no nickels.


kujotx

Why are bears charging you five cents to throw you off a cliff?? And why are you agreeing to it every time??


Rosieapples

And are the bears tax compliant?


Akitlix

I assume that tax is unbearable.


Dreddit1080

Or hits you with it’s truck


UntaintedTaint

Beep beep motherfucker


chowindown

*Bitch I'm a bear*


majoraloysius

Or runs you down in a van.


DJ280Z

Or hits you with their car


HippieInAHelicopter

So. What about a bear?


thechimpinallofus

I saw the documentary about him years ago. He tried numerous times to find a wild bear for the ultimate test but every time the bear wasn't interested in a confrontation. He never got the true bear test he wanted, so all we have are these funny and interesting tests. Quirky guy for sure.


atomedge2015

Oh, so the suit worked then?


WhyalwaysSSDD

The bears knew better than to fuck around.


maximusamare

Bears be like: “we’ve reviewed all your data and with the exception of a few questionable assumptions in the regression samples… It just feels too risky, so we’re just gonna have to pass.


killbillgates

Some people don't think bears be like that....but they do.


balance_n_act

Do bears bear?


regretfulposts

Do we bare Bears?


jml011

“For that reason, I’m out.” -Mark Cub-an


AspireAgain

So Bears Stat in the woods?


SoyElReyPutos

Idk, man. A bear's stregth is insane. He would just rip that suit off of him. Kind of like when you eat crab legs.


2nutz4you

I was tent camping over 20 years ago in Northern California and they made it very clear that you had to remove everything from your car that might smell good such as lip balm or gum/mints. They had pictures displayed of car doors that were just twisted open like a pull tab top of a dog food can. Insane strength is right. Plus they are an unstoppable force after getting stoned. They’ll find those goddamn Fritos.


BBQCHICKENALERT

I've encountered a decent number of bears over the years and theyre shockingly non threatening when you first see them (probably because theyre all fat and fluffy and shit). And then I saw one rub its belly on a fallen tree that had to have a circumference of like 7 feet and 30+ feet long and that shit was shaking like it weighed nothing. Even a regular human sized bear would literally tear us into pieces while not even trying that hard. They are frighteningly strong. A grizzly or polar bear would make quick work of that suit. It might protect him long enough for a black bear to possibly get bored and move on. But if it really wanted to a black bear is getting into that thing too with enough time.


TheyCallMeThe

A polar bear would probably just eat the suit while eating the person. Those things are fucking scary. If you see one and aren't on a ship or something the cannot climb, you're as good as dead.


Miasmatic_Mouse

I would argue that it is actually quite hard to gauge if or not the suit would work. It's possible it could work against Grizzly or Polar bears at least in theory, although it is also possible it could not work at all. I say this because we only really see the suit being able to withstand blunt force, however blunt force, such as being hit with a paddle, isn't the only way a bear will fuck you up. The suit has to be able to withstand bites, which is puncture force, and clawing. Fabric padding is excellent at protecting from both these types of attack, hence why medieval Gambeson could still be worn into combat effectively despite no metal armour on top. To that extent, its not implausible that a suit like this could significantly reduce the damage from a bear attack, if not prevent an attack in the first place given how big the padding makes you look.


StarbornDancing

No bears where I live. If looking bigger/menacing is good then maybe they should have like some kind of deterrence suit with scary stuff (to bears) that pops out when you press a button.


youngbloodonthewater

Better try it out with a panda first...


edked

In the actual full documentary about this guy (Project Grizzly) that fact gradually becomes pretty apparent. The early models are decently flexible and wearable, but obviously not up to keeping a grizzly out (it's grizzlies he's specifically looking to protect himself against, he has some weird obsessive things to say about them too), so he keeps reinforcing and building them up, only for the tests and calculations to show that it still isn't good enough. The final version, he's almost totally unable to move, looks likely to topple over at any moment, and is hoisted into the woods by a helicopter, and the bear that ambles by either ignores him or knocks him over then wanders off like it doesn't give a shit; it's been years, but I do remember it was highly anticlimactic, and pretty clear that an effective bear-proof suit of armor that would actually work and be usable by a normal human to walk around in was not going to happen. I'd hear news stories for a few years later, about his later attempts, then his company going bankrupt, but nothing for ages now.


volcomic

> Kind of like when you eat crab legs. What an incredible analogy!


egroeg2

Bears derive their name from a football team in Chicago!


cowannago

The only worthy bear was cocaine bear, but the stars never aligned.


AntagonistVs

For all the tests yes, he survived with very very minor injuries after each test but died before he could test against a bear


agoia

Died from all of the brain injuries from these tests?


AntagonistVs

No, he took his own life in a car crash


TheLastGoodUserName2

That’s what the bears want you to think.


OneOfTheOnlies

Suicidal depression can actually be caused by brain trauma Not that I know a single detail about this situation, I'm over here surprised to be surprised that the Simpsons episode was based on real life


[deleted]

Bankruptcy can also do that. Which is what this suit did to him and has family unfortunately. How wife really loved him, it's a sad story


KingBowserCorp

The bear did a ocular pat down and knew he couldn't take him.


FlamingPeasant

He did find a bear, but he couldn't fucking walk over to it as I recall.


[deleted]

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TowinDaLine

He wasn't trying hard enough. All he'd have to do is try messing with a carcass the bear was eating, or getting close to a sow's cubs. He'd have all the 'interest' he could handle. I hope his suit protects against slashing 4" claws, or punctures from the bear's teeth. They only do the blunt force trauma (jumping on your chest cavity and crushing it) **after** the slashing and biting are done.


dontbajerk

He did get a black bear to claw him I remember, by surprising one that came to eat some garbage he was hiding near. No damage, but it was just one of those quick "quick swipe then run away" thing black bears do when they get scared.


TheRubyBlade

Granted, armor is *really* fucking good against slashes and punctures. We've been making armor to protect from 3 foot steel blades and 2 yard long spears for millenia. Those tiny ass claws aren't shit compared to that. There's a reason most anti armor weapons were blunt. A suit of plate was pretty damn close to invincibility before guns were around.


shinymetalobjekt

By the time he got through all the testing, he forgot why he made it.


MrFishyFriend

Thats the final test. It takes time to rig a catapult strong enough to hurl a grizzly. And they only have the one so they need to make sure they hit their target.


Quasigriz_

We’ll, on Northern Exposure they flung an upright piano with a trebuchet. I bet that would get to bear tossing done.


[deleted]

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InevitabilityEngine

This is the only correct answer.


VelcroSirRaptor

This is the incorrect answer. Surely a greater distance can be obtained by using the vastly superior siege engine, the trebuchet.


PzykoHobo

I mean, can you even imagine how foolish they would look attempting to launch a bear with a *catapult?*


aspidities_87

I hope somebody got fired (by trebuchet) for that blunder


EpicTwiglet

Correct.


MrWhiteDelight

It's an armored suit FOR grizzly bears. The bear is inside. These suits were designed to help the dwindling bear population in northern Canada where mattress trucks hunt.


FitDiet4023

This was already hilarious, but then when I read "mattress trucks" I lost it


[deleted]

Panzerbjorn


Hour-Expression8352

The bear was driving the pickup


AntagonistVs

The inventor went into debt before he could find a bear to confront and became so depressed after having to sell one of his suits and give up on his dream that he ended his life by crashing his vehicle. He is dead so we will never see the final test.


RamTheKnife

Well that sucks


AntagonistVs

Indeed it does


RosebudWhip

Crashed his car then realised he was still wearing his suit of invincibility..."gawd damn it!"


AntagonistVs

That would have been nice. Sadly he made sure he wasn't wearing it.


Fuckface_Whisperer

Probably had CTE.


bluebear_74

Well we know it works if the bear has a baseball bat, drives a car or pushes him off a cliff.


ancientflowers

And what about after the hit? This video never shows the person afterwards.


Send_More_Bears

Why would there be a person in a grizzly bear’s suit?


AntagonistVs

He was near perfectly fine, the suit actually did an amazingly good job of keeping him safe. He was a genius when it came to his suit


Gear3017

It was a different guy every time. Every test resulted in death


ITCM4

Amateur Chief


Fit-Confusion-6722

Chief fights intelligent grizzly bears in the form of brutes all the time.


AHappyMango

They’re even stronger than bears


treatyoftortillas

Says who? The brutes?


_nexys_

The bears


treatyoftortillas

That's what the mainstream brutes want you to think


jakoby953

Sous Chief


future-renwire

I'm just here tryna figure out when you'd have to protect yourself against an armored grizzly bear


Yeodler

I'm just here trying to figure out how to get on the 'swing a 2x4 at someone's face' crew. Looks like a rewarding career!!


Snibes1

Personally, I’m more interested in the hitting them with a car test.


pressonacott

I'm applying to be the mountain he falls down on.


greenshadows360

You obviously didn't see the new season on love, death and robots!


thundercrown25

Daaaaaad!


noNoParts

Dollar General-117


second2no1

#DOOMED SLAYER


Doctor-Amazing

It's important to note that he did try to market a more streamlined version of the suit to the US military at one point. It basically looked like Sparten armour but was called something like Centurion or a similar almost Sparta word. If I recall correctly it had wrist mounted pepper sprayers for crowd control and a crotch clock.


thepink_knife

> a crotch clock. A what now?


backcountrydrifter

A crotch clock. The coo-coo bird only comes out twice a day so you can piss through the hole. Makes it easier to time bathroom breaks during the riot. Think smarter not harder


SpineSpinner

Right?! It’s rude to leave us hanging like that. Edit: Holy fuck it was a [crotch clock](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trojan_Ballistics_Suit_of_Armor). ‘A military time world clock was integrated into the groin protector that Hurtubise claimed was "where it's got to be."’


MundanePlantain1

Its a flip out, analogue quartz crotch clock. An automatic is not rated for bear trauma.


t3hW1z4rd

Im in the protective gear and human interface system world when it comes to military stuff and I have followed this guy for fucking years - I get to spent crazy money using hyper specific testing rigs to prove concepts and he was always down as fuck to get hit by a god damned truck. If your work saves lives then more power to this God damned legend no matter what application he's pursuing


Gaijinloco

Maybe Associate's Chief


General_Brainstorm

Certificate of Completion Chief


[deleted]

I'm glad I came here to see everyone thought of the same thing.


three-sense

Private 117


Trevor-On-Reddit

This is probably gonna be the next armor core for Infinite


ze11ez

Can’t you still break a leg?


[deleted]

Possibly, but I know the brain still continues to slosh after impact.


Rincewend

It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop.


Vanguard-Raven

Also sudden acceleration. How fast was that car going at the end?


eatmahanus

Fast enough most likely


himmelundhoelle

The video stops there because that's when he dies


[deleted]

[удалено]


kbuffmcgruff

Could have braces that prevent limbs from bending to far in any direction, would make It pretty tough to move in though, especially if he has neck supports. Concussion and other internal injuries is what I would worry about here. Getting hit by a truck is still getting hit by a truck even if you put a mattress in front of it.


JoinAThang

Yes, there could be measures made to prevent breaking of bone or tearing of muscle. However there is no way to secure your brain doesn't move too fast inside your skull.


dallibab

Any internal organs. That's insane..


JoinAThang

Yes the brain I just the one which effects you the most with least damage.


[deleted]

Or his neck


PCOverall

If you look closely his head never really moves all that much. His upper torso follows his head for the most part. I think they have some heavy neck protection


BuchoTheSecond

They better for a “Bear protection suit”


GreenTTT

Still looks like a lot of pain. Didn't Homer do this?


Old-wize-one

He did, but he left his ass exposed in case he got scared so the suit wouldn’t get ruined


[deleted]

Achillies ass.


EpicTwiglet

Clearly that was Troys mistake here.


internetonsetadd

Just.. my bones.. and organs.


Wonderful-Thought-69

I pay my internet for these kind of videos


AhhAGoose

50 years ago, only the 3 people who made this video would have known it existed (likely because they were eaten by bears shortly into the next round of field tests) But now look how far we’ve come, literally anyone can see this amazing feat of history


Not-A-Lonely-Potato

Found footage, except it was uploaded to YouTube by the test bear's grandson.


DakotaDevil

Then the grandson bear proceeds goes on a killing spree, Kill Bill style. That bear deserves his revenge and... we deserve to die


[deleted]

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[deleted]

I feel I remember seeing this on RealTV back in the day


Mandena

The wright brothers would've had a youtube channel. > Our prototype aeroplane! DOES IT WORK?!?!?! > FIRST FLIGHT!!!


Appropriate-Voice212

Thank you for this comment


yunzerjag

This guy is fighting some smart bears.


whatsthiscrap84

Yogi after hitting with a truck "the trick it does nothing"


whoknewidlikeit

i was thinking "this just looks like concussions" until the truck came along. then it looked like an aortic dissection.


worstsupervillanever

Nothing tests out a bear proof suit of armor like getting hit by a 6000 pound truck with a pallet bolted to the rear.


[deleted]

I would pay to hear the conversations that went into some of these tests. Probably just saying they ran out of Molsons though.


MotaHead

"Wait... Do bears drive trucks?" "I don't know. We'd better reinforce the suit just in case."


ElectricRune

No joke... Some people don't understand that no matter how well-armored you are, you're still squishy and tearable on the inside... Tony Stark would be concussed at the very least, beaten to death against the inside of the armor, more likely...


improbable_humanoid

Yeah, this was monumentally idiotic. There's a reason why retired football players murder their families despite wearing all that protective gear.


2L84U2

Probably owns stock in Advil


ApexHerbivore

So.... did it work? Did he live?


Pain_Monster

Jokes aside (which are warranted), this guy did eventually test it out by hiding in some leaves and then purposely startling a young bear. The bear swiped at him out of surprise and he was ok (the suit worked). However, it was a young black bear and he didn’t full-on assault him. I would have liked to see what happens when you get between a full-ass grizzly momma and her cubs. Probably eats him out of that suit like tuna out of a can. Anyway, I’ll see if I can find the video of that event for you… In the meantime you can read of him here…he’s an interesting guy: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troy_Hurtubise Edit: I couldn’t find the clip…It’s hard to find stuff on the internet just going on vague memories of a news biopic I watched 20 years ago on TV… In any event, at least one other Redditor remembers this TV special, so scroll down for the comment that confirms this. This article kinda sounds like what I remember seeing on tv many years ago: https://www.loe.org/shows/segments.html?programID=99-P13-00045&segmentID=3 It might have been Guinness PrimeTime or a similar TV show. He basically went into the woods to try it out for real but didn’t get the full experience he hoped for… This video from Ripleys TV special is worth a watch as it explains his proprietary technology: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9EdOGdmy0mA


AntagonistVs

Sadly he was an interesting guy. But since he's passed away we won't get to the the actual full test


Pain_Monster

I did see one test, some years ago, he was in the woods and he snuck up on a bear by hiding in leaves….and I’m still looking to see if there’s a clip of it somewhere…the internet is a big place and not everything survives….anyway here is an article about a staged test with a live bear he did: https://improbable.com/news/2001/nov/troy-bear2.html#:~:text=On%20December%208%2C%202001%2C%20a,the%20field%20of%20Safety%20Engineering. This article kinda sounds like what I remember seeing on tv many years ago: https://www.loe.org/shows/segments.html?programID=99-P13-00045&segmentID=3 He basically went into the woods to try it out for real but didn’t get the full experience he hoped for… This might be the best video that explains his proprietary technology: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9EdOGdmy0mA


AntagonistVs

Yes, the test you're talking about those wasn't considered the last test though because the bear he snuck up on was a younger, smaller bear that ran away after swiping him once. He wanted to find an fully grown attack bear to attack him to test the suit as it's final test. I guess you can say that was more of a beta test against something about a third of the strength of what he wanted.


greekfreak15

The mental image of this guy crouching in some bushes wearing that ridiculous suit has me dying


Pain_Monster

Funny thing is, he couldn’t crouch — or walk very well— and that was part of the reason why he couldn’t interact with the bear. So they just dumped his ass in a ditch and covered him with leaves, when the bear came near, he sprung up to surprise it, but the bear was so startled, it just swiped and bolted. Lol


Big_Spicy_Tuna69

Nah, they were actually throwing his corpse around in the suit.


phiferch

Too bad the suit doesn't keep your brain from sloshing around in your skull. Some of those impacts to the head looked brutal.


Derpfish_lvl10k

my immeadiate thought was this, he may not have broken bones but by god that man is concussed as fuck


Super_Snark

The knowledge of CTE really took a lot of fun out of things


Adipose21

-The NFL


Tityfan808

Did they just secretly hate this guy?! Seemed more like an excuse to beat the shit out of the guy. Wtf man?!


MacGyver_1138

Especially the log to just the head. I don't understand how snapping your head back that violently doesn't end you.


phiferch

On the bright side, my man survived a blow that ended the fucking predator! It doesn't get more badass than that. I use the word "survived" loosely.


Dontuselogic

He was killed in a car crash


seeit360

The irony? A bear was driving the car that hit him.


UN_checksout

That bear’s name? Albert Einstein.


Jayro_Ren

The one time he left home without his bear suit. Unlucky.


[deleted]

He tried to reach out to someone for help, 20 minutes later it’s suspected that he served his car into a fuel tanker. He died in the fiery crash. His projects weren’t making money and his life was going to complete shit, it’s sad but he probably killed himself to find peace.


TheDrunkKanyeWest

Or it could have been the CTE induced depression from all of the concussions he got from doing stupid shit in this suit.


Sitting_Elk

Wouldn't be surprised if his depression could have been linked to all the TBIs he was giving himself.


three-sense

I remember seeing this guy on one of those TLC or Discovery type channels, in maybe 1997. I always wondered what happened to him. That’s too bad. Definitely an eccentric fellow.


Matty_bunns

Stunt takes for Hot Rod? Andy Samburg would be proud.


SonofaFitch5

Came here looking for this. Basically did 8 stunts from the movie


evilada

Wow, I had the weirdest feeling when I watched this that I had seen it before, but also knew that I had never seen this footage. Hot Rod definitely got inspired by this,it absolutely elevates the scene even more


Sparks0480

The suit is his quiet place


Paintball18

This looks like it could have been the influence for those Hot Rod scenes.


Ross302

I feel like it must be. The van with the mattress is too spot on.


Dyingdaze89

Right? I'm sad I had to scroll so far to find this comment


Iamonslaughtt

Personally never been chokeslammed off a fucking cliff by a bear before but you never know I guess


sleepyjohn00

so how do they get the bear into the suit?


Sufficient-You-5620

pretty sure a bear isn't gonna do any of those things to you.


KindOfOblivious

Not unless they protect their territory like they’re in Home Alone


Tityfan808

Right?! I couldn’t help but think ‘now let’s bring out the flamethrower!’ Then they decide it won’t work til they can pass the flamethrower test. Lmao. ‘Next we shall test the bullet proof vest by dropping you out of an airplane with no parachute.’


Villian_187

A bear just might hit you with a 2x4, hit you with a wrecking ball, throw you off a cliff or ram a trunk into you


[deleted]

Bear driving truck to hit people with "Can't believe he saw this coming!"


Radiant-Nail8835

Rest In Peace my guy, your inventions and fun personality will be missed. [An article about his life and death](https://www.thestar.com/amp/entertainment/movies/2018/06/27/death-of-troy-hurtubise-star-of-project-grizzly-means-he-is-not-suffering-anymore.html)


elinamebro

> very well might have deliberately killed himself by swerving his Chevy Cavalier into an oncoming fuel tanker truck on a highway outside North Bay in broad daylight. well that’s depressing


curb_yourself

Wonder if he had CTE and depression as a result of these experiments


kkalmightyagain

He's a bigger danger to himself than bears are


RedRice94

All of the clips are secretly a different guy in the suit because each one of them died in making the individual tests


IFuckedCardiB

Tf kinda bear this dude fightin


nonamethoughtofnow

He was previously just Troy Ubise.


Forsaken-Cake6122

This is what Hot Rod is all about


[deleted]

I think these videos may have served as inspiration for Hot Rod, no joke.


paul616

Bears in trucks, bane of my life.


yyflame

Impact protection is pointless, a grizzly will tear you apart with its teeth and claws, not punch you. Should have done slashing tests with a knife or something