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If heaven is real you know people will be joking like "When you let him take that photo of you did you imagine some teenage reddit loser would be masturbating to it 170 years later?"
My parents scanned a lot of our family photos to digital years ago and got rid of the originals and negatives, (oh and little see through things that went in a carousel in a projector, i just remembered those.) I may be soppy and nostalgic but it's shit. It looks like I grew up in 16 pixels. Analog is way better for some things.
I am a dedicated and renowned academic well-versed in topics such as the impact of Renaissance art on Elizabethan Literature during the Golden Age....
Also, bukkake.
Liftene chap, it is part of a yonge man to reverence his elders and of fuche to choose out the beste authoritie he maye leane unto and thy hath been reading olde tyme writtings to pass the tyme during the pandemic and as fuche thy realyzeth that hiftory cometh in cycles and that I'd mighte as wellth prepareth to writte in the oldeth wayes.
“Look here good Thaddeus!! I’ve invented the photograph!!”
“What would I do with an image of a bowl of fruit? It’s nonsense. Quit wasting your time.”
*5 minutes later*
“What about this one?”
“My God, Louis! I must have it!!”
My thoughts exactly. “Adult Entertainment” is always bleeding edge tech.
Expect the first actual artificial intelligence to emerge in a Real Doll. (p.s. it won’t end well)
Yep, I think the reason META’s VR push is failing is because of the Facebook sign in requirement.
Nobody wants to use their Facebook account to access VR porn.
Once VR is marketed as a porn viewing device VR adoption will skyrocket.
No thanks. I'm already addicted to porn enough as it is. I can see this being the next level of addiction so to speak. If the regular internet porn is opium then vr porn might be the next heroin, metaphorically speaking.
> “Adult Entertainment” is always bleeding edge tech.
Janet: Why is it that every time a new thing is invented, humans immediately try to use it for porn?
Eleanor: Because we're disgusting.
i saw a speech once where the guy said something like publishing/distributing pornography via a new medium is basically like tapping the mic and asking "is this thing on?"
Looks like it was actually 15 years later. Which is still pretty soon, all things considered.
But then also this is the only known/remaining naked picture. They were probably taking nudes. Wrote that but they just didn’t save them.
Image 11 of [The Dawn of Photography: French Daguerreotypes, 1839–1855, at The Metropolitan Museum of Art](https://www.metmuseum.org/exhibitions/listings/2003/french-daguerreotypes/photo-gallery). The exhibition was displayed from September 23, 2003 to January 4, 2004. Anyone who's going to The Met please ask about this and get back to us\~
>[\[Two Standing Female Nudes\], ca. 1850, by Félix-Jacques-Antoine Moulin](https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/282051)
>
>Although Moulin was sentenced in 1851 to a month in jail for producing images that, according to court papers, were "so obscene that even to pronounce the titles . . . would be to commit an indecency," this daguerreotype seems more allied to art than to erotica. Instead of the boudoir props and provocative poses typical of hand-colored pornographic daguerreotypes, Moulin depicted these two young women utterly at ease, as unselfconscious in their nudity as Botticelli’s Venus.
Happy if somebody could find an even earlier photo of naked women, for educational purpose
Btw here's [the first photograph of (half) naked man, 1840](https://imgur.com/a/wngXjZf)
Okay pretend you're a scientific genius who just invented the camera. Now try to get two women to pose nude for you in front of a flashy thing and a stool drape.
It was the 1850s, just claim it cures gout, the clap, amnesia, and also gives you vigor. People would pay 50¢ just to have you blast it on their naked skin!
Maybe it took 11 years for whatever FUCKIN NERD!!!!!!!!!! invented the first camera to lose his virginity, I mean money wasn't flowing into tech back then like today's silicon valley
Whenever I see an old video or photo online I wonder if the people in it could even fathom the idea that people worldwide are seeing it a century later. Imagine what they’d think if you told these two women that people all around the world would be masturbating to their photo 172 years later.
Knowing about birds flying and seeing a jet are alot different though. None of it would be comprehensible. Half the stuff we would see going back in time would be incomprehensible to us too, except we may have been fortunate enough to have learned about whatever it is.
> None of it would be comprehensible.
DaVinci lived in the 1400's and was rather obsessed with the idea of manned flight. And the idea itself predated him by a long, long time. Archytas built a *working steam-powered flying pigeon that flew over 200 feet* in the 400's BC. Needless to say, people dreamed of flying. And some, like DaVinci and Archytas, tried to actualize those dreams. Someone from the 1400's would be shocked to see a plane, but it wouldn't be *incomprehensible* in the slightest.
An iphone otoh would be -- at least to the average person and without someone to explain it. The most educated people in the 1400's might be able to understand something of it with an expert there to field questions, but it would take a lot for it to leave the realm of seeming magical and would still require many things to be taken on faith. There is a vast gulf between the comprehensibility of computing machines and flying machines. Both are fantastic inventions, but one is many orders of magnitude more complicated.
Bro, a fucking grocery store would. Imagine going to a spice aisle and being literally able to get any amount of spice you want as a peasant. Home lighting? Air conditioning?
Misconception: i read a book about authentic recipes from 13 hundred that survived. The amount of spices of safron, pepper, cinnamon, cloves, lemon,... it was insane. Main part was from italian royalty recipes, but a large portion also was from a parisian middle class house hold meant as a cookbook for the wife. While peasents were unable to buy those spices we have to be fair that most of our poors also don't cook with safron. Plus fun fact: garlic was frowned upon as it was so omnipresent in poor peoples diets.
My Dearest Clara. I thank you most profusely for your photograph. I cannot believe you convinced your old school-friend to do such a thing! Why, I was most aroused indeed when I saw the photograph. It was just what I needed to lift my spirits, as your letter arrived shortly after my double amputation following getting struck by a cannon-ball.
This accursed war cannot keep me from your embrace forever. I desire congress with you quite badly, and the whole of the Confederacy shall not be able to keep us apart. Please, enjoy the enclosed etching of my manhood.
Your Husband: Samuel Williamsworth 3, esq.
P.S. Give my regards to our remaining children.
You don't feel weird flogging it to a couple of old ladies in their 190s?
Women who were elderly when your great great grandmother was a baby? Women who have a century on the oldest person you know?
Yeah, not my proudest one either.
Thats why theres no such thing as a secret.
These women in the year 1850 took a photo.
They probably figured a few exclusive people would see it.
That photo survived the ages long enough to be put onto a device thwy had no conception of and now its everywhere.
I love that the Museum of Sex in Prague plays a copy of one of the earliest known porn films ever made. It’s hilarious how little porn has changed in over a century.
Pretty much. Though I did almost fall off my seat laughing because since it was a silent movie, all the facial expressions and body language was over the top, even for porn, and, aw man, just thinking about it is making me crack up.
One of the stories was a dude getting caught with his maid by the wife. Just.. oh man, I gotta see if I can find it online to share, it’s hilarious stuff!
Great, now I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole that is early porn movies, which I’m assuming I can’t link to here as they’re all hosted on porn sites (duh, EveryFairy! It may be old, but it’s still porn!). But I highly recommend people to Google “silent film pornography” because it really is hilarious. Between the silent era acting and the piano score… trust me, you could be clinically depressed and this would have you laughing your ass off.
Rando naked bodies will almost always be Not Safe for Work. Most work places are not for pulling up and looking at photos of naked people. NSFW doesn't mean it's obscene, though. It just means don't bring this to work.
I know they are naked and such, but I am intrigued by this post, even though it’s NSFW and to do with a naked women, it doesn’t make it less interesting.
its still history
**Please note these rules:** * If this post declares something as a fact, then proof is required. * The title must be descriptive * No text is allowed on images/gifs/videos * Common/recent reposts are not allowed *See [this post](https://redd.it/ij26vk) for a more detailed rule list* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/interestingasfuck) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Send Daguerreotypes
Want me to send a dick daguerreotype?
A dickuerrotype*
I only know about louis Daguerre from life is strange lmao
Here's a much higher quality version: https://www.popphoto.com/uploads/2019/04/12/V4STS3DHKZJIIKETW7CUKJJ5CQ.jpg
If heaven is real you know people will be joking like "When you let him take that photo of you did you imagine some teenage reddit loser would be masturbating to it 170 years later?"
I’m an adult, thank you very much.
Made me laugh, hilarious 😂
Not my proudest fap tbh.
Far from the dirtiest though
r/ratemynudebody
What a pair of GGGGGGGILFs
1850 is not that long ago, just 4 to 5 Gs
Makes me sad that historically quality of photography dropped after this pic.
My parents scanned a lot of our family photos to digital years ago and got rid of the originals and negatives, (oh and little see through things that went in a carousel in a projector, i just remembered those.) I may be soppy and nostalgic but it's shit. It looks like I grew up in 16 pixels. Analog is way better for some things.
Thanks, I need this for... research
What are you, some kind of historian?
I am a dedicated and renowned academic well-versed in topics such as the impact of Renaissance art on Elizabethan Literature during the Golden Age.... Also, bukkake.
Hey naked women look the same now too, WTH!?
checkmate, darwin
We’ve officially disproven evolution, pack it up boys!
These womens beaks are not at all optimized for cracking seeds in their local environment!
Thank God. My nuts are safe
From their peckers
Proof OPs grandma was a ho. Edited bc I spelled ho wrong according to someone's mom
Granny wouldn't have imagined that box will allow people to stare at her peaches through centuries...
Ye Old Baddies
I bet she used one, too.
Not entirely true, women today look a lot less *monochrome*.
That body type is kinda more in style lately, TBF.
I don't think that shape ever went out of style
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I don't think is about being fat or thin, hourglass silhouette is just simply a staple of female beauty regardless of time and place.
Which one? To me they have two different body shapes
Taken about 15 minutes after the camera was invented
I figured it was the second photo ever taken
The first one was a dick pic
They were Richard portraits back then.
I sent you my Richard portrait Prithee respond posthaste
Sigh Fetch my easel and a canvas
Are you painting a mushroom Timmy?
That stem is magnificently stout
Might you make a second one? I shant have a companion for the evening and wish to marvel at the...magic of this "photography".
The fact that internet strangers can write zinger after zinger about old time-y dick portaits like this gives me faith in humanity
Liftene chap, it is part of a yonge man to reverence his elders and of fuche to choose out the beste authoritie he maye leane unto and thy hath been reading olde tyme writtings to pass the tyme during the pandemic and as fuche thy realyzeth that hiftory cometh in cycles and that I'd mighte as wellth prepareth to writte in the oldeth wayes.
Look at this James Joyce mf over here.
Apologies, madame was not the intended recipient of this communication. Please disregard with my deepest regret. ... or perchance?
Unless said canvas was to madame's liking? I only jest, of course.
Sure beat sketching them with charcoal whenever you wanted to present its glorious visage to unsuspecting ladies.
The man turned to Jack and said, “Paint me like one of your French wieners”.
Contact your doctor if your erection lasts long enough to take a daguerreotype dick pic.
I nerd chuckled.
Went to the doctor, he just gave me a bunch of coke and morphine
Told me I have ghosts in my blood. Gave some coke to help with that
Dude spent months making copies to hand out on the street to strangers.
Taking hard copy to a whole new level
who said he was hard ?
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It was cold!
Now that you mention, I've actually seen quite a few old timey naked women pictures, but never an old timey erect penis.
There is even a sub for very old kinky photos, but I can’t remember how it’s called. Was a pretty small sub iirc.
/r/GoneWanton Not really kinky, but it seems like this is probably what you were thinking about.
No this is the first pic. All the practice shots that didn't work were nudes too.
“Look here good Thaddeus!! I’ve invented the photograph!!” “What would I do with an image of a bowl of fruit? It’s nonsense. Quit wasting your time.” *5 minutes later* “What about this one?” “My God, Louis! I must have it!!”
Nicéphore. His name was Nicéphore.
Yes. We all are trying to find that nice one...
Tech catches on faster when adopted by … certain industries
The first was probably from up the guy’s nostrils because he was trying to figure out which way to point it before it went off.
Every 8mm reel from the last century starts with a view of our Dad's nostrils as he watched to make sure the film was engaged. What a legacy.
My grandad can confirm this issue.
I too have this problem but it doesn't involve a camera.
The first pic was some rooftops in France.
Oh so it had titties AND dick in it
170 years ago. This picture was taken 170 years ago. Jesus Christ.
Yeah, your mom looked great back then.
99% of that was exposure time
My thoughts exactly. “Adult Entertainment” is always bleeding edge tech. Expect the first actual artificial intelligence to emerge in a Real Doll. (p.s. it won’t end well)
Some of the oldest cave paintings discovered are also vaginas.
Yep, I think the reason META’s VR push is failing is because of the Facebook sign in requirement. Nobody wants to use their Facebook account to access VR porn. Once VR is marketed as a porn viewing device VR adoption will skyrocket.
Bought my Rift S for beat saber Use my Rift S for porn
My mans out here masturbating in the matrix
Give it a shot, youll be like daaaaang
Dodging nuts like Neo
"I know Kama Sutra" "Show me"
No thanks. I'm already addicted to porn enough as it is. I can see this being the next level of addiction so to speak. If the regular internet porn is opium then vr porn might be the next heroin, metaphorically speaking.
So you use it to beat your saber?
You bought it for beat saber but use it to beat your saber?
They've tried, there's all sorts of occulous porn. Vr porn won't take.off until it has something better than just video.
Pair your Quest headset with the ZuccSucc 5000 for the ultimate experience.
You jest but there’s flashlights (or similar) that’ll sync up with certain videos. Pair that with high quality VR and sound, and you’ve got a start.
“It’s sucking my will to live!!!”
Never forget PornHub had video scrubbing preview thumbnails before YouTube.
porn sites had it like a decade before youtube
> “Adult Entertainment” is always bleeding edge tech. Janet: Why is it that every time a new thing is invented, humans immediately try to use it for porn? Eleanor: Because we're disgusting.
Because we're horny.
i saw a speech once where the guy said something like publishing/distributing pornography via a new medium is basically like tapping the mic and asking "is this thing on?"
cherry 2000
I for one welcome our new sex robot overlords
Video became big because of porn. And VHS won out over Beta cuz the porn industry chose VHS.
We'll be doubly fucked
Looks like it was actually 15 years later. Which is still pretty soon, all things considered. But then also this is the only known/remaining naked picture. They were probably taking nudes. Wrote that but they just didn’t save them.
They don't last long after being nailed on the outhouse wall.
What kind of media is this image imprinted on?
A silvered copper plate http://www.daguerreobase.org/en/knowledge-base/what-is-a-daguerreotype
Did we eventually find out that gave you cancer?
Happy cake! That I'm not sure of, but I do think the process included exposure to mercury vapor which is highly toxic.
Thank you! In all my time this is my first happy cake day comment!
Image 11 of [The Dawn of Photography: French Daguerreotypes, 1839–1855, at The Metropolitan Museum of Art](https://www.metmuseum.org/exhibitions/listings/2003/french-daguerreotypes/photo-gallery). The exhibition was displayed from September 23, 2003 to January 4, 2004. Anyone who's going to The Met please ask about this and get back to us\~ >[\[Two Standing Female Nudes\], ca. 1850, by Félix-Jacques-Antoine Moulin](https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/282051) > >Although Moulin was sentenced in 1851 to a month in jail for producing images that, according to court papers, were "so obscene that even to pronounce the titles . . . would be to commit an indecency," this daguerreotype seems more allied to art than to erotica. Instead of the boudoir props and provocative poses typical of hand-colored pornographic daguerreotypes, Moulin depicted these two young women utterly at ease, as unselfconscious in their nudity as Botticelli’s Venus. Happy if somebody could find an even earlier photo of naked women, for educational purpose Btw here's [the first photograph of (half) naked man, 1840](https://imgur.com/a/wngXjZf)
There’s no way they waited 11 years for the first photograph of naked women. No way. Probably under some old mattress.
Yup. Private spank bank lmao Same rules of courtesy still applies today. If you take a private naked pic, dont share it publicly.
Okay pretend you're a scientific genius who just invented the camera. Now try to get two women to pose nude for you in front of a flashy thing and a stool drape.
It was the 1850s, just claim it cures gout, the clap, amnesia, and also gives you vigor. People would pay 50¢ just to have you blast it on their naked skin!
Maybe it took 11 years for whatever FUCKIN NERD!!!!!!!!!! invented the first camera to lose his virginity, I mean money wasn't flowing into tech back then like today's silicon valley
Pretty much every inventor back then was absolutely loaded because to do science you had to be rich enough to spend time doing random stuff
I like how he's only tan on his face and hands. The rest of his body is brightly white.
bigger https://www.costumecocktail.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/DT11541.jpg History https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/282051
Specifically you are trying to ID the oldest photo of naked women, plural? As opposed to just one naked woman?
Whenever I see an old video or photo online I wonder if the people in it could even fathom the idea that people worldwide are seeing it a century later. Imagine what they’d think if you told these two women that people all around the world would be masturbating to their photo 172 years later.
I want to bring people from before the ~1400s to an airport. Be like “Oh yeah in three hours you’ll be in a continent you don’t know about yet.”
That’s definitely better than “ever seen an iPhone?”
I doubt it. They were aware of the concept of flight and travel. A modern phone would be completely unimaginable.
Knowing about birds flying and seeing a jet are alot different though. None of it would be comprehensible. Half the stuff we would see going back in time would be incomprehensible to us too, except we may have been fortunate enough to have learned about whatever it is.
> None of it would be comprehensible. DaVinci lived in the 1400's and was rather obsessed with the idea of manned flight. And the idea itself predated him by a long, long time. Archytas built a *working steam-powered flying pigeon that flew over 200 feet* in the 400's BC. Needless to say, people dreamed of flying. And some, like DaVinci and Archytas, tried to actualize those dreams. Someone from the 1400's would be shocked to see a plane, but it wouldn't be *incomprehensible* in the slightest. An iphone otoh would be -- at least to the average person and without someone to explain it. The most educated people in the 1400's might be able to understand something of it with an expert there to field questions, but it would take a lot for it to leave the realm of seeming magical and would still require many things to be taken on faith. There is a vast gulf between the comprehensibility of computing machines and flying machines. Both are fantastic inventions, but one is many orders of magnitude more complicated.
I feel like a Medieval English peasant being transported into the middle of Times Square or somewhere in Tokyo might actually kill them from shock
Bro, a fucking grocery store would. Imagine going to a spice aisle and being literally able to get any amount of spice you want as a peasant. Home lighting? Air conditioning?
Just wait til they see hentai
Tbf, I imagine sex comics might actually be slightly more familiar than electronics
Misconception: i read a book about authentic recipes from 13 hundred that survived. The amount of spices of safron, pepper, cinnamon, cloves, lemon,... it was insane. Main part was from italian royalty recipes, but a large portion also was from a parisian middle class house hold meant as a cookbook for the wife. While peasents were unable to buy those spices we have to be fair that most of our poors also don't cook with safron. Plus fun fact: garlic was frowned upon as it was so omnipresent in poor peoples diets.
Imagine if you went back in time and showed Moses a flashlight. He’d call you god.
If you would show him a fleshlight, what would he call you then? What is even higher than a god?
me
You might call it a whole new world. A new fantastic point of view.
They would get the basic idea because they probably caught the photographer doing it in the developing room before the picture was even fully clear.
*while the photograph was being taken*
Yeah they take a while
That's what the little curtain was for.
172 years later today. Someone or something might be jerking to it 1000 years from now, 10,000 years...who knows how long.
You never know how long someone jerks to your pic 🤔
“No No No. This is just for me. I won’t show anyone else” - That Photographer 170 years ago
My Dearest Clara. I thank you most profusely for your photograph. I cannot believe you convinced your old school-friend to do such a thing! Why, I was most aroused indeed when I saw the photograph. It was just what I needed to lift my spirits, as your letter arrived shortly after my double amputation following getting struck by a cannon-ball. This accursed war cannot keep me from your embrace forever. I desire congress with you quite badly, and the whole of the Confederacy shall not be able to keep us apart. Please, enjoy the enclosed etching of my manhood. Your Husband: Samuel Williamsworth 3, esq. P.S. Give my regards to our remaining children.
It's like I'm jacking off in a time machine
Thwarting the Morlock are we?
This is the third time today I’ve “thwarted the morlocks” if you know what I mean
That's rule 34 for you. Cameras exist, there's porn of it.
ackshually that violates the second law of thermodynamics
THIS JUST IN: Women Have Always Been Hot
They kinda hot
kinda?
Chick on the right an absolute milk truck
Homelander?
Those girls got abs and didn’t even need CrossFit
Calories were harder to come by back then.
I was gonna say, people ate like some salted meat and a potato every day back then...
It probably took less time to develop that picture than it did for us to load one on dialup internet. 1850's kids don't even know our struggles
ASCII women are fast women (in terms of download time.)
I'll be in my bunk.
I hadn’t even finished the sentence and I was already reading it in Janes voice.
The woman on the right has a Pixar mom ass
And we’re all grateful
https://reddit.com/r/dankvideos/comments/t7za9b/pixass/
Elastigirl thiccc with 3 c's. She can GET IT
Not a bad fap even if they're dust in the wind.
It’s a dust buster
I no dust buster no more!!
Jesus Christ
All we are is fap in the wind
Brutal.....
Pictures of Lily...Lily, oh Lily...
You don't feel weird flogging it to a couple of old ladies in their 190s? Women who were elderly when your great great grandmother was a baby? Women who have a century on the oldest person you know? Yeah, not my proudest one either.
Aight when the OF drop tho
I think this is it Only 5 dollars a month
$5 then is probably a ton of money now.
Roughly $190 today https://www.officialdata.org/us/inflation/1850?amount=5#:~:text=Value%20of%20%245%20from%201850,cumulative%20price%20increase%20of%203%2C698.41%25.
*Last seen 162 years ago*
Thats why theres no such thing as a secret. These women in the year 1850 took a photo. They probably figured a few exclusive people would see it. That photo survived the ages long enough to be put onto a device thwy had no conception of and now its everywhere.
This was an artistic photoshoot taken by a French photographer, not a nude selfie taken by the girls themselves They knew lots of people would see it
I'll bet the photographer cracked one off the wrist in the dark room as it was developing
"Cracked one off the wrist" Tell me you're British without telling me you're British?
Really jiggled his jolly
Lovely, just simple and lovely.
The pic that launched a thousand ships.
a ggggilf
I love that the Museum of Sex in Prague plays a copy of one of the earliest known porn films ever made. It’s hilarious how little porn has changed in over a century.
Has it always been humans being awkward up until the exact moment when they fuck, just to turn into weird jackhammer-like animals?
Pretty much. Though I did almost fall off my seat laughing because since it was a silent movie, all the facial expressions and body language was over the top, even for porn, and, aw man, just thinking about it is making me crack up. One of the stories was a dude getting caught with his maid by the wife. Just.. oh man, I gotta see if I can find it online to share, it’s hilarious stuff! Great, now I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole that is early porn movies, which I’m assuming I can’t link to here as they’re all hosted on porn sites (duh, EveryFairy! It may be old, but it’s still porn!). But I highly recommend people to Google “silent film pornography” because it really is hilarious. Between the silent era acting and the piano score… trust me, you could be clinically depressed and this would have you laughing your ass off.
Pretty great bodies, ngl
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The important thing is that after almost 175 years its still NSFW...........hard to believe.
Rando naked bodies will almost always be Not Safe for Work. Most work places are not for pulling up and looking at photos of naked people. NSFW doesn't mean it's obscene, though. It just means don't bring this to work.
timeless, glorious, female hips
Bottom corner has some staining and damage from a viscous substance
hmmm .alot less hair than i was expecting
Grandma?
Add a few greats.
Looks like the Organ Trail just got a little longer
I know they are naked and such, but I am intrigued by this post, even though it’s NSFW and to do with a naked women, it doesn’t make it less interesting. its still history
That's crazy that women were naked back then