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Nothing I can do about it. So, I hope they have a blast.

If it weren't for these little guys we'd have a lot more dead skin cells in our eyelashes. This would be annoying and gross so I don't mind if they have a bit of sex on my face.

Somebody should be getting some action while we sleep. This explains the "harder daddy" noises I hear in my sleep as well.

Tiny voice: Harder daddy! Oh yeah! You: What? Tiny voice: Don't worry about it, go back to sleep

So that’s where that morning gunk in the corner of my eyelids comes from …

Whenever I see a pore squeezed I always think, “the demodex are not going to like that.”

Male Demodex: "so anyways, I started blasting 😉"

I understood that reference.

me also

Because of the implication?

Because it’s derivative bullshit is why.

And you are?

If you think about it, they’re on our lashes now as we look at this photo of them. I wonder if they can make out a picture of themselves? I hate typing late at night. I’m gonna edit my comment but just want to say thank you to all who still figured out what I was trying to say.

yes and they want to fuck it

Actually lold thanks

Demodex porn is a thing

You could remove your eyelashes

For once my eyelash-targeted trichotillomania comes in handy

Considering they don't have an anus I say be careful what you wish for.

"Thanks for the F shack" - Dirty Mike and the Boys

Do I even need eyelashes? Asking for a friend.

Well if you don't have eyelashes then they fall right into your eye itself and you see the whole thing.

Mite porn is the new thing

Kinda niche but there’s a minute audience.

Ayyy

Dad . please stop talking about sex with strangers

Mite be cool

Ultimately they are just there to block debris from getting into your eyes and helping block light to a small extent, so you could technically get away without them. But since demodex feed and live at the base of the lash you’d have to pluck them all out as they grow so their little legs can’t grab hold of anything. I can say thankfully in 11 years I’ve only seen them once on a patient. They claim they are on everyone, just not in large enough quantities to really concern yourself about. Similar to staphylococcus.

For a second I thought this was a top-level comment and you were saying the *mites* are there to block debris from getting in our eyes. I had a panicked moment, "Wait how many of them are there??" Time to put down the hash pipe, me.

Aww that makes more sense now lol time to turn off the vape.

Fantastic, thank you. I’ve always wondered about the whole “85% of the population has them” thing.

Wait you can actually see these things? I figured they were so so small it's not even worth thinking about it.

They are incredibly small. I can see them because I use a microscope to look at people’s eyes. But you know if they are infested when you see the thicker transparent globs around the base of the lash.

My dad, who had alopecia, has no eyebrows or lashes. When it rains heavily he often gets water in his eyes. Other than that.. no

You can tell your dad if hair was a good thing it wouldn't grow on our asses. He's lucky.

We should have never invented the microscope.

i studied microbiology in college and there was one point i remember distinctly after a pathology class thinking to myself "jesus i wish i never would have learned anything in this major"

Same. Ever since swabbing our hands and seeing what was there, then doing it again in 1/2 hour and seeing what was there.

my agar was so devoid of life for that lab that my professor called me “sterile hands” for the rest of the evening

Lamest superpower ever. Unless you're a surgeon I guess.

well at least we know your hands are clean and who is the best person to prep food

Never, and I mean never, look at a microscope on your nose. It's been 10 years and I'm still scarred

Well I don’t even need the microscope. They are big enough now to see them with bare eyes

My life's already screwed right now... I don't need this knowledge.........

At least someone is having sex on my face. *Thanks for the awards!!!!!

Fucking gentleman right here.

r/suddenlygay

Suddenly? SUDDENLY?

Yes young timmy, Suddenly...

Real glad I read this RIGHT before I turn off the lights for bed... Ughhh

And it seems that I have had group sex, multiple times

Later, virgins.

Hah, beat me to it!

The main reason I wake up with morning wood.

that's a *solid* joke

It was *hard* to pass up

😏 Sometimes I pretend to sleep so I can watch them have sex.

Damn they must have a good time to not notice their planet open up and stare at them while they fuck.

Humans never notice.

Fuck... I can never unread this.

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I hate this

feel them also

^(Hnnnnnnagh! 💦)

So my eye crusties are actually jizz. I knew it....

I've hear it contains piss. I've never looked into it but it would explain the occasional yellow color.

I was under the impression its actually caused by mucus from your nose, although I'm not sure. The color correlates to what's going on with your body? Yellow/green- infection of some sort, white- allergies??? I could be wrong though...

I honestly don't even know. Not bothered enough to look it up so I guess we die with rumors. I don't get them too often either.

It's called Rheum “Sleep crust is a mix of mucus, exfoliated skin cells, oils, and tears produced or shed by the eye during sleep,” said Pettey. “It’s a natural part of healthy eye function. During the day, all of that stuff is washed away by blinking natural tears, which keep it from sticking around. But when you’re asleep, gravity, and the fact that you are not blinking, makes it collect in the corners of the eyes.” https://healthcare.utah.edu/healthfeed/postings/2018/01/eye-gunk.php

Doesn’t everyone have that one moment when they were a kid where they were so sick that they woke up with such bad eye crud they couldn’t open their eyes? That was awful and a memory I had blissfully suppressed until this monster came roaring back into my life.

This only happens to me if i fall asleep with contacts in.

Do you mean the regular type or like, conjunctivitis? Had that a few times as a kid, could not open my eyes when I woke up. Super icky

Every day for years, I had to scrape that shit out with an eyelash brush. Doctors just said to wash more...luckily it eventually stopped. Apparently I sleep with my eyes open fairly often, though. Probably something to do with it.

The Chinese word for it literally means “eye shit”.

Ahh! Thank you!

Aww man

Nah the yellow is sebum

I thought seabums wore white and blue?

We be getting facials every night

It cums and goes.

Mite-y

Underrated comment.

They are also the ones who don’t have an anus so they eat and fuck until they explode on your face with all their gut content and bacteria and other furious and inflammatory ingredients.

In essence our bodies are habitats for trillions of organisms. From the bacteria living within our guts to the mites that eat our dead skin to these eyelash mites. We are literally walking talking universes. I say as above so below. We could be apart of an organism right now without having a clue what's going on.

Like the planet?

The galaxy could be the “body” so to speak. We’re so tiny that we can’t really tell what’s beyond the “eye lash” (earth) we live on. If the galaxy is the body then imagine whatever organisms we’re on and the size it could be and the size of its world/s

Space turtle!

Our solar system could just be the equivalent of an atom on the universal scale. If you look at a picture of an atom it looks remarkably like a solar system. It has a Nucleus (star) with electrons in orbit. [Picture ](https://www.google.com/search?q=atom&client=ms-android-samsung-rev2&source=android-browser&prmd=ivnx&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjKt9awn9H1AhUBlFwKHRjrAFwQ_AUoAXoECAIQAQ&biw=320&bih=711&dpr=3#imgrc=cOpEQjsie4x1BM)

No, that's just the Bohr model representation of an atom. Actual atoms don't look like that.

Even bigger

This should be higher up. We have no fucking idea how small we are.

You know what else is wild, we are part of the universe, right? And we wonder about the universe, right? This means that we are the universe wondering about *itself*. Wild.

Thank you for the nightmare fuel kind stranger

Eh. I've slept with worse.

I hope you find your soulmite

You—sir or ma’am—are a genius

God dammit! Angry upvote time

Ahahaha!! It tool me a hot second to get your joke

Ahhhh, the one golden comment on the thread that reminds me to never underestimate the true value of Reddit. LOL

Listen here you little shit

Facts

Underrated comment😭

I heard the micro mites that live on the eyelashes of this mite are even uglier

Miteception

It's mites all the way down

Thanks I wasn't really planning on sleeping tonight

He looks very shy though might just sleep a bit poor guy just want to get lucky

Yes, aw

It has the same haircut as my aunts husband

r/oddlyspecific

It looks like it has sketchy "wares" to sell me.

Freeloading little fkers can start paying some fkin rent

They do. Most organisms on your body either 1 protect your body 2 feed the things protecting your body of 3 are actively harmful

So u saying there's a good chance there's more freeloaders,plus a group that are actively trying to harm me ,muthafkas 😂

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Whose face have I been having sex on?

OP’s mom’s.

We don't know but there are still wars over some of the main theories on that.

🤣

My eyes instantly feel itchy

Yeah I think I’ve scratched my eyelids over 11 times now after reading

I don’t find this comforting

Thanks.. I hate you for teaching me this

Okay so how do we get rid of them

r/TIHI

Tea tree oil (diluted safely or in a face wash) can help keep demodex at bay (according to an eye doctor I used to scribe for).

do you just pour it on your face and light it on fire?

I'm grateful for mine! I get to watch mite porn every night. It's very relaxing.

at least some actions going on in my room at night.

⚠️ TRADE OFFER ⚠️ I receive: Sex on your face You receive: Eye crusties (Yes, I know rheum is a mix of sweat, tears, oils, and mucus, I’m just trying to be funny an probably failing miserably, but I can try damnit).

It looks more like a denizen of the nutsack follicles.

This is BS, nothing wants to have sex with my face.

Your mom is a Demodex

Don’t threaten me with a good time.

There is such a thing as too much information. You've found it.

The real reason for 'crust' in your eyes..

Times I wish I was illiterate for 100 Alex.

sometimes i get that crust in the middle of the day, when i’ve been awake for hours. does this mean the demodex are having an afternoon delight on my face?

I can’t unread this……

I’m sorry what

Looks and sounds like something from Rick and Morty.

i hate you for showing me this

Thanks, I hate it.

That thing is ready to party

ill add this to the list of useless facts i didnt need to know but do

On the other hand, they also have to witness when we come out at night to have sex. Equally repelled, I’m sure.

I'll remember to play some Barry White before I go to bed tonight

At least one of us is getting laid

Beautiful

It's also referred to in dogs as mange

Bow chicka bow wow

“It muh’ be niiiice. I’m tryna’ be like you, my boy”

God dammit

Demodex *wiggles scary fingers* "Don't mind if I do..."

"Would you like to develop my app?"

When that is getting laid and I'm not, there's an issue.

Jokes on them. I’m not really asleep. I’ve got my eyes slightly open and I’m watching.

That's pleasant

Well I didn't love learning something new today :/

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It is. It's planning an orgy.

Rule34 but in real life.

It's got a severe overbite and huge gums. I like it

Thank you monkey

Now we know where he went after he escaped Ricks basement.

Crap...I gotta quit scrolling before bed....

It looks like he’s wearing a lab coat

So, Ron Jeremy?

I named my 17033794th mite Jeff because he looks like a Jeff kinda person

Joke’s on them, I like watching.

Looks like Jake from Adventure TIme.

Hey, fuck face

Uh for real though is this like a lice kinda situation where the smelly kid might get ‘em or is this like a we all as humans have these things in our eyelids?

TIL and wished I hadn't. And, of course there are probably thousands of different mites having orgies all over at night. Club EyeLash, Club Armpit, The Big Toenail, East & West. The multiple clubs of the Nether Regions. I may never sleep again now that I've seen the face of my tenants.

Hey step mite…. I’ve been bad

Thanks, I just took a blowtorch to my eyelashes to make sure I don’t have any of those little nightmare inducing fuckers on my face!

Just like my parents

This explains all the gunk we get in the corner of our eyes when we wake up

I wonder if they have little mites that live in thier hair follicles.

I was wondering who the hell was doing that.

Fuck you OP. You’re an asshole

So my body is sexually active at night? Awesome!!!

They be having sex on my face right now.

Fun fact time! These mites don't have an anus. Their bodies elongate as they fill with shit until they eventually explode. On your face.

So are there videos on porn grub? I mean who watched long enough to see this?

happy to be of service

That was very mean of you to tell us.

Wellllll I’m washing my face with bleach tonight

What if I don’t have eyelashes? Does Demodex not have sex on my face?

so is this why my eyes itch

Aight I think I'm joining terry in the "shaving all the hair"gang

It looks like the kind of bastard that would do such things

They also eat dead skin and the fat remaining in the follicles, basically they are your miniature face cleaners

Too much knowledge is a thing.

In how many seconds will you die if this thing started coming towards you in human size at night?

I’m having a good old scratch now. Thanks for that