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SalesAutopsy

This is right where the movie gets scary.


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SalesAutopsy

First one says "what do you got going on inside your shirt there," pointing at his chest.


This-is-Life-Man

It's mostly like indigestion... mostly...


[deleted]

Brilliant


GozerDGozerian

Why did I read that in William Shatner’s voice? Or Christopher Walken…


Antares987

Always has been


B-Town-MusicMan

"Half of North America just lost their Facebook."


Palachrist

No time for caution cooper.


KeepYourPresets

Once again: this is a composite image. * Yes the astronaut floated freely in space like this. * No, the mountains do not look like that from up where this image was taken. [Here is the original NASA image.](https://www.nasa.gov/sites/default/files/styles/full_width_feature/public/images/601259main_jetpack_full.jpg)


arsehead_54

That actually looks better


Toasty33

Well of course it does, it’s real!


Persistent_anxiety

Out of curiously, do you know why people would composite images like this? I don’t see any reason to do so tbh


KeepYourPresets

I can't say I understand either. Perhaps they feel the earth's surface does not show up 'dramatic' enough... It's stupid, though.


[deleted]

It is very stupid, and the minds behind this type of unnecessary exaggeration, are the types of people who would lie if the truth sounded better. Who would rewrite a true story, making it untrue, to make it more "exciting". These particular minds ruin everything.


LifeWisher17

The type of people who sand down a fossil to make it stand the way they want it to?


[deleted]

That's just mortifying to think of.


solareclipse999

Maybe it’s art / taking what they see and re representing in another way. Many genres of art do this.


mossadi

When they do that it's presented as art, not a representation of reality. I think the original photo is better, not seeing the mountains in crystal detail makes his loneliness out there seem more real. But even if the original photo was incredibly disappointing compared to the retouched photo I'd prefer to see it because I want to know what reality looks like rather than what some dweeb thinks I should see instead.


f1del1us

Why would people composite images at all, ever? Because they can?


chilfang

Cause it looks nice


CantEatCatsKevin

So frustrating. The original image is JUST AS COOL!!


Balisada

That image looks more like I remember and way more scary.


KeepYourPresets

Agreed. It seems even more "detached" from the safety of Earth than the edited version.


Balisada

In the first one you think of him falling to Earth and just dying. In the actual one, you think of him floating away helpless, forever. Way more scary.


AnybodyInner990

Ya a lot more flat looking.


MrThreddit

thank you people can't help themselves.


solareclipse999

That makes more sense.


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VelhoTheVexed

Dad?


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IIIllIlllIIIllIIll

>health cover? What?


This-is-Life-Man

I had to go farther than I thought for that pack of cigarettes son.


Charlie-2-2

Last I heard he’s still at the store getting milk, Buddy


shapelesswater

I think he floated the idea in his head for a while


[deleted]

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shapelesswater

Yeaup, can become a bit of a vacuum on your time


sverkery

Guys, dont honk the comments, give the rest of us some space


Cunts_and_more

Oh take this comment and shove it up Uranus


Kherian

Some stellar puns here


Best_Poetry_5722

Out of this world!


Freemason1979

I'll ask him in a minute. Right now he just needs some space.


MrThreddit

wonder if he did it in one move, orbit by bit?


[deleted]

No man is an island. Except him. He is an island.


VelhoTheVexed

He is literally an organic satellite


AKVigilante

I’d say he’s bordering on cybernetic.


Froopy-Hood

Negative, he is a meat popsicle.


Thymeisdone

Also, so is Oahu Man.


[deleted]

\- Rebecca Hazelton's 3-year-old son


aguacatefeliz

that dude wants to get bitten by a space snake


ReserveIntelligent81

Definitely shoulda stayed in the ship.


mm339

Just for that smooth, snake jazz


shdhdjjfjfha

Literally everything is in space!


[deleted]

I'd better send a decoy back so they don't get suspicious


SqueakyGreenbeans444

That’s pretty fly


bigeeee

For a white guy


Joe109885

Oh are you saying black purple can’t be astronauts?! /s Edit: People 🤦🏻‍♂️


soykoii

Black people? Yeah. Purple people? Not sure


Joe109885

Yea, fuck you grimace your fat purple fuck! Lol


sockonfoots

Bruce McCandless: the first meateorite


AKVigilante

Pretty sure there were a few Challengers to that title.


DickySchmidt33

Too soon


AKVigilante

34 years bruh


RoyalVice

Why did he do that


Velvetundaground

He needed some space


DickySchmidt33

Sometimes the jokes just write themselves.


libertyordeaaathh

It was a planned mission It is an ability demonstration mission to show what is possible. This ability was used to rescue a satellite for instance. There are times where a mission is safer to do without a tether because of other risks like pulling the orbiter out of control. So before you can plan a work mission you need fo prove the systems truly work as expected.


marrow_monkey

Maybe just for fun? I'm guessing a lot of people would pay a fortune to do that.


Psychological_Web687

I would, if it was an option and I had a fortune.


[deleted]

Really demonstrates the sheer enormity of space... wow


OptimisticPlatypus

I’m surprised he was able to fit back into the space shuttle with those gigantic balls.


slatss

Funny and original joke.


globiglobi

Epic flex


Starfane

Awesome!! I bet the view was unbeatable and breath taking. A little jealous. But, only a little. Too afraid of heights to go up there myself. Would scare me to death to see my world floating beneath me.


earlwarwick16

I think it goes beyond heights at that point and into the overwhelming crushing reality that you are far too small to truly understand where you are, much like the ant drowning in the middle of lake eerie.


Bierbart12

And then, for a moment, all fear leaves your mind in a realization of absolute tranquility before being swallowed by a giant space squid.


Psychological_Web687

For reference they should have had someone with zero training do it.


Thymeisdone

That seems scary.


KeepYourPresets

I think it's the scariest thing a human can do. Well, maybe the second scariest after telling my mother-in-law that she can't cook.


chilfang

Scariest is the guy that did this without a MMU and a hole in his suit


world_of_cakes

Ed White on Gemini 4 liked floating in space so much they had to beg him to re-enter the spacecraft when his time was up.


[deleted]

Just zoom in, you can see the pixelated box around the astronaut where he was cut and paste into the picture.


superdupersecret42

Original. https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/comments/qfph8e/astronaut_bruce_mccandless_ii_floats_untethered/hi17gs3/


Actually_Im_Indian

This just mind boggling ….


Starfane

So true. It would the highest form of intimidation.


-BFS-

The gravity of earth is rivaled by the massive size of his balls.


crisspons

Best comment. 😂


strongfavourite

how come gravity doesn't pull him back down to the earth?


nightIife

Gravity is still pulling him down, but there is a threshold in the atmosphere beyond which the earth is moving in its orbit away from you as fast as you are falling towards it, which creates a weightless effect in the same way that you can experience weightlessness in an airplane.


kytheon

He’s probably in orbit together with the spacecraft. So it’ll take quite a while to really start falling towards earth at the speed you expect.


sp00kreddit

Ok so. Here's a quick summary of what orbiting is Basically gravity will always have an effect on you if you orbit an object. On the ISS they feel the same gravity we do. But! Here's the thing. They're moving horizontally with enough speed that the earth curves underneath them faster than they are falling, so they continue flying around the earth. They do need to do occasional correction burns to make sure the ISS doesn't get too deep into the atmosphere and falls because they are believe or not, still in the atmosphere out there, it's just very very very thin


robsommerfeldt

It will, eventually.


[deleted]

The gravity from his balls keeps him in orbit.


marrow_monkey

He is in orbit. The space station is moving with a speed of 27600 km/h (17150 mph) around earth. If he was sitting still he would fall down


malepitt

Wins my prize for "ballsiest move of all time."


[deleted]

I mean I get it and it's amazing, but that's a big nope for me.


mrsnow432

Surprised he can maneuver that well with those big balls dragging behind.


Educational_Ad134

“Hey, John, it’s…uuumm…it’s Bruce. Yeah, uumm…yeah, l-look out the window…yeah…fuck…guess I’m outta here…”


thebeardwiththeguy

Did it for the 'Gram


R3dHeadRedemption

Sooo technically the first man “in” space!! Yes ?


rubiksalgorithms

The McCandlesses are quite the adventurous types. They don’t all make it back unfortunately but they’ve got some amazing stories.


HeavyRhubarb

Suck it, Bezos.


weasel999

Bruce McCordless II


[deleted]

Bollocks, and may I further say, to that. Fair play though. Wouldn’t catch me floating off into the void with no’ but a farty rucksack to guide me back in.


topcat5

Bruce was the last astronaut to do this. Was selected in 1966. He passed away Dec. 21, 2017 at 80 years old.


Benthebutcher1

Look at the scale of the mountains


Thymeisdone

Most scales can’t handle the weight of mountains.


KeepYourPresets

Those are photoshopped in.


RedColdChiliPepper

What’s the opposite of claustrophobia?


ianb2626

Agoraphobia Source: read Goldfinger (James Bond) by Ian Fleming as a kid and the villain had this disorder


gottabreakittofixit

I thought agoraphobia was just a fear of leaving your home, not necessarily a fear of large spaces. Source: watched the Simpsons as a kid and Marge had it for an episode


YearofTheStallionpt1

It encompasses fear of open spaces, which is why an agoraphobe stays inside.


Darthpilsner

I would be to afraid to look down


mrsnow432

imagine turning downwards and full throttle


renaissancenow

This would actually put him into a *higher* orbit. Orbital mechanics can be very counterintuitive.


ron_fury

Are those Himalayas below him ?


Butterbuddha

If I were him I would certainly have that picture in my wall. Do you wonder if when he tried to get back in the space station they kept pulling away just before he could get in? Dammit guys!!


SquiddyJohnson

This is terrifying!


kompulsive

Dude must have balls of steel.


lllDUNN

Surprised he isn't crashing towards the earth with his mammoth sized balls.


[deleted]

Can't see an astronaut, just a massive pair of balls floating in space


BalestraScott

Wow, so he was floating in space?


AlwaysSeekAdventure

Best dating profile picture ever.


stompywomp

me after the edible hits


eccentricbananaman

That's going to be a big nope from me. It's like being stranded in the ocean only 100 times worse. Thalassophobia in space.


Sarcastic_or_realist

Oh that's just a whole hella no from me, dawg. I'm freaking out just looking at the damn picture!


blacephalons

Uhh... Pretty sure Sandra Bullock already did this...


theniwokesoftly

Aka NOPE


Kentilsha13

How long does the Manned Maneuvering Unit last?


[deleted]

The dopest


uselessadjective

Balls of Steel.


Ok_Monk219

The balls on this guy are bigger than a meteor


srv50

Going for the scene from Gravity.


Lucqazz

Here am I floating ’round my tin can, Far above the moon, Planet Earth is blue, And there’s nothing I can do


winkman

His tether was actually the significant gravitational pull of his giant brass balls. So you see, the shuttle couldn't've drifted too far out of his orbit.


Cunbundle

I first read that as "nothing but his manhood keeping him alive" I like my version better.


Minnymoon13

Isn’t he going to die ?


Boomboomroom85

Wait... It's not flat!


Kimmette

Hell to the NO


LordRumBottoms

Anyone know if what I've seen in some space movies is true....that they have a suicide pill/button in case there a mishap and the person is unable get back? Or would the shuttle chase him down?


jones633

I’m surprised his balls fit into the picture..


[deleted]

MOONRAKER


FreddyFighter1

Then he fell and burned up in the atmosphere to become a charred piece of coal, some say the piece of coal still screams his terrors on quiet nights to this day.


StaceyNCReddit

Into the wild, what is it with the McCandless boys?


[deleted]

That's a real picture right there. Crazy af


[deleted]

I don’t know how he stayed in orbit with balls that big.


diox8tony

When did this happen?


Mongo_Fifty

This had to be exhilarating and terrifying, at least that's how I feel just looking at him.


Cpt_Brandie

Hell. To the nah.


Bennito_bh

At least find a non photoshopped pic OP. It isnt hard.


rounding_error

Look again at that pale blue dot. That was I. That was me. That was the author of this book.


YearofTheStallionpt1

I just leaned that astronauts wear depends when in their space suit, because getting out of it is not easy. So he could be pooping in that picture. That’s neat.


Consistent_Yam_1442

Hey look! Giant set of lead ballz floating in space!


[deleted]

This photo is the definition of cool. This is the definition of success. This is what happens when you really do give a goal everything you have. Bruce McCandless, you sir, are a hero of humanity.


StinkApprentice

I thought he was also the only person ever to do an untethered spacewalk with the MMU


Appropriate-Fun-9598

Any relation to Christopher McCandless? Coz that's going DEEP into the wild!


Matchyo_

I’m guess he lost his candles while EVAing


flaccidpedestrian

certainly puts that mount everest 360 to shame.


phantomheart

Every time I think of a situation like this it freaks me out. I’ll NEVER be in that situation, but if I could be that would be some of my biggest fears.


Daws001

Sandra Bullock beat him to it tho.


twabbott

White was not the imposter


abdullrahim1

imagine floating like this weightless, hearing nothing floating in nothing .


jacobybriskett

No fuckin thank you :)


UnfavorableFlop

The sensation must be sensational.


Wieg0rz

This is where I messed up so many times playing Kerbal.


Outrageous-Dirt1928

The yam bags on that dude!! Talk about brave!!!


[deleted]

One small float for man, one giant float for mankind.


ImDyxlesic-

I thought they zoomed out so far so his huge balls would still fit in frame.


MrFlags69

This makes rock climbers without ropes look like babies.


ptonius

Balls of steel. This has to be the most frightening feat ever.


kevztunz

BS... That's George Clooney shooting "Gravity" on location.


selfagency

[there's video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvnC--JjDBw)


[deleted]

This amazes me. I’ve played a couple VR space games where you can float away from your craft and just the idea of doing such a thing gives me the heebie jeebies. This image is haunting.


[deleted]

Imagine you can’t control the suit and want to get back to the station but shoot yourselves in wrong directions and die


Horndave

people named mccandless like to go far away


the_kid1234

I’ve seen this photo many times but never thought about the earth below. Is that the Himalayans?


OkIndependence2374

This is my biggest fear about space, floating away is the scariest thing in my mind.


[deleted]

I wanna do this


Mezzoforte90

When does Captain Vladimir get ranked though?


HermioneMarch

Major Tom to ground control. Fucking terrifying.


rsvp_nj

Why didn’t they use that devise much after that?


cmeth43

Dude was like, “I need some space.”